A/N: Ok, I admit, this chapter may not be of the highest quality. I've been struggling with my writing a lot lately. However, I hope you still enjoy it. Our boys are struggling and doing so much to protect each other only it's doing way more harm than good. If you enjoy, please leave a review. Thank you so much! :)

Chapter 54

Severus' hands shot out to hold Harry's arms as the Gryffindor wavered where he stood, threatening to crash to the floor without the support. Yet, Harry was quick to wrench from his grasp, stumbling until he caught himself on the wall. Severus watched as Harry used a sleeve to swipe at the blood trickling from his nose, as his face tightened with obvious pain, and as his head jerked as though being struck. Between the boy's actions, the nearly complete lack of magic he could feel, and the growing agony in his own arm, Severus found himself angry, irrationally so.

Was it irrational when it was in response to the pure fear he felt knowing the boys he loved—his boys—were going through something and he could do nothing to help them because they wouldn't let him?

"I have had enough. Tell me what's going on."

Harry's eyes flicked to him, but quickly darted away as he wiped his upper lip again. "Nothing."

"Really?" Severus arched an eyebrow, crossing his arms. "You'll forgive me if I'm not convinced given the entirety of the last month and a half and the current situation."

Harry glared, still avoiding steady eye contact. "Believe what you want. Never stopped you before."

Severus' eyes narrowed, recognizing the anger for what it was. "You're Occluding."

"No, I'm not."

"Then look at me," Severus demanded.

He watched Harry's eyes continue to dart around as his face filled with strain, obviously fighting to decide whether to obey or not. He didn't necessarily need the boy to look at him, didn't necessarily need to Legilimize Harry to know he was symptomatic of full and constant Occlusion, but he did need to see the extent. It was obvious to him that Harry was Occluding his mind, not just memories, which was cutting off his emotional range, leaving him with nothing but rage and nosebleeds from the mental strain. However, he needed to know if there was more, needed to know what else Harry was forcibly hiding from not only the world, but himself, all of which would do nothing but hurt the boy.

When Harry didn't seem to be capable of deciding, Severus stepped closer.

"Look. At. Me," he repeated with his own barely concealed anger.

The tone and his proximity seemed to work as Harry finally looked at him with enraged defiance. As their eyes met, Severus quickly and wordlessly slipped into the Gryffindor's mind only to retreat immediately when he felt like he was viciously burnt.

"Harry, let me in."

"No!"

Severus took another step and reached out to Harry as the boy backed up into the wall he'd been holding onto, quickly realizing he had nowhere to go. Severus grasped Harry's left arm before gripping the Gryffindor's chin firmly, forcing their eyes to meet again. Prepared for the burning sensation as he entered, he pushed through until he was in Harry's mind where his eyes widened again. If he wasn't so concerned about the harm Harry was causing to himself, he would be impressed with what he was witnessing.

There was nothing but fire. Harry's wall was extraordinary, huge and blazing and encompassing everything. Harry wasn't just keeping out basic Legilimency attacks and hiding important memories. He had absolutely everything concealed behind the fire. There were no open paths to any part of Harry's mind. As he stood there, the fire was hot and the flames licked at him. Every time something tried to pass through the fire, in or out, it grew and consumed whatever it was.

"There you are."

The hissing voice of Voldemort drifting around through the crackling fire startled Severus.

"No! Get out!" Harry shouted and the fire pulsed, singeing Severus.

"Harry, stop this!" Severus demanded, wincing at the hot flames. "You can't keep doing this! You can't block your mind like this!"

"Get out!"

He could feel Harry fighting to push him out while also fighting to block Voldemort despite not knowing where the madman was intruding. Needing to see the boy's magic before leaving to confront the desperately reckless Gryffindor, he thought the spell and moved from Harry's mind to his core. The core coming into view, Severus' eyes widened again. Just like Harry's mind, flames were everywhere, completely concealing the boy's core except for two very thin strands of gold and four braided colours. The gold strand was just enough to ensure Harry could still use magic as normal while the Elemental Magic seemed to be escaping against Harry's wishes. He was clearly fighting to hide his Elemental Magic completely only Severus couldn't understand why. He watched as wispy colourful strands attempted to drift through the fire only to burn away.

"Harry, you have to stop!"

"I can't!"

A burst of hot air flung him from Harry's core and he was facing the boy once again. More blood had left Harry's nose, enough that it was beginning to drip from the chin. He was also clutching at his head again. Severus vaguely recognized an increase in the pain in his arm, but ignored it as he reached out to grasp Harry's shoulders, infinitely worried at the damage he now knew Harry was causing to himself.

"You cannot Occlude your mind and magic like this," Severus said firmly. "You know how dangerous it is."

Harry pulled away from him again, raising his head so Severus could see his bloody face and red, pain-filled eyes. "What am I supposed to do?"

"Not this! Harry, child, you are hurting yourself. You are hurting us."

"I'm saving you!" Harry cried.

"From what?" Severus retorted, needing to understand.

"From him! From me! From what he can do to you because of me!" Harry yelled.

There was a pang in Severus' heart as he realized. "What happened at Christmas was not your fault."

Tears poured from Harry's eyes. "It was you know it was! He's in my head, you heard him, and I can't keep him out! I won't let him find you!"

"Harry, you could cause a break if you keep Occluding. You could fracture your mind, your magic…the bond!"

"I'd rather break! I'd rather you be in pain than dead! I can't lose you that way! I would rather not have you if it means you're alive!"

The pure agony he could hear in Harry's voice was heart wrenching just as much as the words and their sentiment were.

"And what about you? Are we meant to live without you? Am I after all you've given me?" Severus said, tortured at the mere idea of Harry letting himself die in this futile effort to keep them from Voldemort.

Harry shook his head, tears and blood dripping from his face. "I'm not worth it. You all are."

Severus was certain he would stop breathing soon at Harry's self-hatred and defeated tone. "Harry—"

"You never should have saved me in July."

His heart definitely stopped then and Harry dashed around him, taking off running down the corridor. Severus reached out to grab him, missing as the pain in his arm increased even more.

"Harry!"

Severus was prevented from following Harry by a sharp pain slicing through his left arm, the unexpected severity causing him to stumble, followed up by a deep, cold ache in his chest that made it hard to breathe. By the time he was able to breathe through the pain enough to look up, Harry was gone.

Harry barely made it into the Gryffindor common room before he collapsed to his hands and knees under the agonizing onslaught in his skull. It was as though all the headaches from the last month and a half were hitting him at the same time. He pushed himself back until he was sitting against the wall, his fingers curling on the floor and his head falling back against the stone.

He was trembling and fighting back sobs of pain, physical and emotional, when he heard a voice and was pulled unwillingly into his own mind.

"You think you can hide them from me?"

Harry spun around desperately, searching his flame-filled mind for the source of the voice.

"Harry, Harry, Harry," Voldemort taunted.

"No, you're not here! I've blocked everything! You can't be here!" Harry yelled.

"You can't hide anything from me. Remember? I've got my own place in here."

"You can't get through. I won't let you!"

"Are you sure?"

Sharp, black strands appeared from seemingly nowhere, crawling along the air to wrap around Harry before heading for the fire. Harry flinched as pain lanced through his head when the strands touched the flames, making them flicker vigorously. As he watched, the strands burned to ash.

"I won't let you in. Not again," Harry vowed, determined.

"How do you know I haven't already gotten in?"

Harry shook his head in denial. "I won't let you have them."

"I already do."

Dread filled Harry as he remembered what had happened at Christmas.

"I got what I needed from you. I can take them whenever I want."

"No, you can't. I've sealed off my magic, our bond. I'm breaking our connection."

"Don't you remember? I have your magic now too. Besides, that's not the only way I can get to them, is it? Shall I remind you?"

All of a sudden, a scene was unfolding in front of him over his flames. Severus was hurrying through the castle corridors, jaws clearly clenched as his right hand was clasped tightly around his left forearm. Severus paused briefly, cursing quietly as the pain seemed to increase, before continuing on, arriving at a door he pounded on seconds later. The door was opened quickly and Alexei pulled Severus into his quarters. There were no words as Severus held out his shaking arm and Alexei shoved the man's sleeve up, revealing an angry, weeping, writhing Dark Mark. Misty blue eyes flew up to meet black in terror and the scene disappeared.

Fear for Severus engulfed Harry and he let out a short, desperate scream.

"Take me! I'm the one you've always wanted!" he yelled.

"Yes, you are, and I will destroy you, but not until I take everything from you first."

"I'll stop you!"

"How? You can't even find me in here and with that bond so helpfully in place, it will be so easy to hurt you with them."

"I won't let you! I'll break the bond before I let you hurt them again!"

"Or will you just break yourself?" Voldemort taunted. "I will see you soon, Harry."

"No! Leave them alone! Take me!" Harry sobbed desperately.

Alone is not the way. The bond must live for you to live.

Harry shook his head as he sobbed. "I can't be the reason they die."

Be the reason they live. Do not abandon the bond.

"I can't. I can't."

The bond must live.

As black fractals began to flood his fire, Harry screamed in agony and everything went dark.

The bond must live.

Draco frowned as he walked into the Great Hall only to find Severus wasn't there either. He'd woken and readied himself in Severus' quarters alone that morning. Not that that was strange. Severus was often gone before him and he'd been doing his best to avoid Severus, but there had been no sign the man had even returned to the rooms last night. The cup from his morning coffee was not on the kitchen table, his robe was still on its hook, and his bedroom door was open when it would normally be closed for the day. In fact, as he looked around the Hall, he found it all to be strange as none of his family was there.

Though not confident, he told himself they would all show up in a little while and made his way to Slytherin table, sitting with Blaise and the others.

"See it's started snowing?" Adelaide said and Draco glanced up at a window, spotting the light snowflakes.

"Supposed to be a pretty bad storm by dinner," Blaise added.

Draco hummed as he took an absent bite of his breakfast, more focused on repeatedly glancing at the Great Hall doors and staff entrance, expecting to see Severus, Leif, or Alexei at any minute. His gaze also fell on Gryffindor and he found Harry nowhere to be seen. He felt his concern grow ever so slightly.

"What do you mean cancelled?"

Draco turned back to his friends at Blaise's question and found Jasper Chamberlain, a sixth year, sitting nearby and talking to Simon.

"There's a sign on the door saying class has been cancelled for the day," Chamberlain told them.

"What class?" Draco asked. Classes at Hogwarts were rarely cancelled.

"Defence," Chamberlain replied and Draco's eyes flew to the empty seats at the staff table again, worry immediately skyrocketing.

It couldn't be a coincidence that his entire family was absent from breakfast and Alexei had cancelled class for the day. Glancing over his shoulder at Gryffindor table, Draco swiftly left Slytherin and headed over, coming up behind Granger and Weasley.

"Where's Harry?" Draco asked, stomach twisting at the looks of confusion he received from the Gryffindors.

"We thought he was with you and Snape," Weasley answered.

"He left the common room last night and we figured he'd gone to the dungeons," Granger explained.

Draco frowned. Harry had been acting strangely, sure, but to just disappear for so long was unlike him.

"Draco."

He turned at the call of his name and found Blaise with the others standing in the hall doors.

"Charms."

"I'm sure Harry's fine," Granger said, trying to sound reassuring, but failing miserably. "I'm sure we'll see him in class."

"Right," Draco said skeptically, but he still left the Gryffindors to join Blaise and the others. They headed to Charms, Draco only vaguely hearing their conversation as he remained lost in his own worried thoughts. He hadn't seen or spoken with his brother much since their fight in the lavatory a couple weeks earlier, but he'd remained worried. Maybe Harry was with Alexei and the vampire had figured out what had been wrong with Harry for the last month and a half.

He spent all of Charms unable to stop thinking about Harry or the absence of all his family at breakfast. A deep, cold ache that he attributed to his worry settled in his chest and stomach. When class ended, he split from Blaise and the others as they went to their next classes and he went to search for Harry. He'd become unsure Harry was with Alexei the more he thought about it. Surely he would've been told if they'd found out what was wrong and it didn't explain Severus' absence from breakfast.

He took his entire first free period to wander the castle, checking all of Harry's usual spots while periodically glancing out windows and watching the storm outside worsen. When he found no sign of Harry, he settled himself in the library to make an attempt at completing some homework despite his persistent concern. He knew he could go to Alexei or Severus, but he was still trying to be in their company as little as possible to avoid them discovering his conversations with a Lucius only he could see or the silvery lines still spreading across his torso. They were getting harder to hide as they were beginning to reach up his neck and down his arms after crawling over his shoulders.

He sighed to himself as he sat at his and Harry's usual table, pulling out the notes he'd begun making for their project on Severus' Dark Mark. There weren't many, not on the Mark itself as he'd been working off pure memory of the one time in the summer when he had seen the way the Mark was connected to Severus' core. It had become difficult to let his magic connect to his family since Christmas. He was just too terrified about what he may do whether he wanted to or not. He couldn't let go of what he'd done to his father, how he'd done it so easily, so willingly. He couldn't let it happen to Severus or Harry.

He had, however, started looking more into the theory behind crafting from the intro material Leif had gotten for him while also researching different existing bonds he could draw inspiration or aspects from. Despite his own issues and the conflict he was having with Harry, he knew this project was still important to both of them.

He opened one of the books on bonds and began reading, poising a quill over his notebook for notetaking. He didn't get far.

"Come now, Draco."

Draco stiffened and his hand tightened on his quill at the voice, gaze hard as he kept staring at the text.

"You shouldn't keep lying to yourself this way."

"Go away," Draco snapped quietly, wanting to avoid drawing attention to himself.

"I'm hurt, son. I'm only trying to help you."

Draco's eyes snapped up to Lucius who was lounging casually in the seat across from him where Harry usually sat and he glared.

"You have never done a thing to help me," he spat.

"Except make you who you are."

Draco shook his head. "I'm not what you wanted me to be. I refuse to be that."

Lucius left his casual position to lean forward on the table, lacing his fingers together. "We both know you already are. You proved it at Christmas. You need only accept it."

"I am not like you. I'm better than you. They make me better."

"Except they don't want you, do they?" Lucius replied quickly and Draco's heart stuttered as he fought not to believe the man. "At least, Harry doesn't. After all, he told you you're not his brother and we both know why. He knows what you are."

"I'm your brother and—"

"Well, maybe you shouldn't be!"

Remembering the fight, remembering Harry's awful words, was painful.

"He didn't mean it," Draco argued weakly.

"This path you think you are on is not your path. There are only two paths you can take. you can embrace who you are and return to me or you can kill me in a vain effort to escape, thereby killing yourself," Lucius told him.

"I'm more than that, more than you. I will never come back to you," Draco protested firmly, needing to believe it.

"Then I suppose you choose death for that is what you will face if you so foolishly continue to destroy your magic."

"Shut up," Draco muttered, dropping his eyes to his text again.

"Be sensible, Draco. Come back to me. I am waiting for you."

"Shut up!" he yelled and, looking up, he found Lucius was gone.

The table of Ravenclaws looked at him sharply at his shout and he jumped when the bell signalling the end of lunch echoed throughout the school. Startled that he'd completely missed lunch without realizing, he packed up his research and headed quickly for Potions, wincing and rubbing absently at the sharp pain in his chest.

Turning the corner to the Potions classroom, he found the class of Gryffindors and Slytherins crowded around the closed door, all muttering to each other. Spotting Blaise and Adelaide, he made his way over to his friends.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Snape's cancelled class," Adelaide said and Draco looked at her in surprise.

"Potions and Defence were both cancelled?" Draco clarified and when Adelaide nodded, he immediately searched the crowd of students.

"What's that on your neck?" Blaise asked. "Got some ink on you?"

Knowing it wasn't ink, Draco quickly covered his neck with a false scratch and turned away from Blaise.

"Yeah, must've," he said vaguely. "Sorry, got to go."

Before Blaise could say anything else, Draco walked away, pushing through the other students to Granger and Weasley. When they spotted him, he saw the worry that instantly filled their eyes and he had the answer to the question he hadn't even voiced yet.

"You haven't seen Harry," he said, foregoing the question, and they both shook their heads.

"He didn't come to class or lunch," Granger told him, voice sounding almost scared.

"We've no idea where he is," Weasley added.

Something was so very wrong.

Without saying another word, Draco weaved through the students and took off running. He dashed through the corridors and up staircases until he found the door to Alexei's quarters. He didn't bother knocking and he felt the wards recognize him as he pushed the door open. Entering, he found Severus on the sofa, his head leaning back with his right arm draped over his eyes. Alexei was sitting next to the Potions Master with Severus' left arm resting on his leg, the man's sleeve pulled up to reveal the Dark Mark. Alexei was dabbing and wiping at the Mark with gauze while murmuring to Severus. Leif was sitting in Severus' usual wingback, but was on the edge and sitting completely straight with his eyes closed. Draco knew that position and focus. Leif was looking at magic, trying to find something.

"What the hell is going on?" he said and all three sets of eyes flew to him. "Where's Harry?"

"Surely you can tell us and tell us why Harry has cut off his magic and end of the Life Bond," Leif replied and Draco frowned.

"Because of you."

Draco fought not to look directly at Lucius standing behind the sofa, a satisfied smirk on his face.

"I haven't seen him since yesterday, no one has," Draco told the three men, forcing himself to ignore his father. "Is that what's going on with him? He's blocked his magic and the bond?"

"As have you," Leif said shortly and Draco's eyebrows furrowed slightly, confused.

"So afraid of who you are," Lucius tutted behind Alexei and Severus.

"Which has removed the last layer of protection between Severus' Mark and Voldemort," Alexei added, dabbing at Severus' Mark again.

Draco's eyes widened, both at the idea that he was hurting their bond and at Voldemort apparently now having full access to Severus' Mark.

"Just what you want. You know it is." Lucius smiled evilly.

"What is on your neck?" Leif asked suddenly, leaving his chair to stand next to Draco.

"Nothing, just some ink. I—" he was cut off by Leif pulling the collar of his shirt to the side to reveal a silvery thread winding up his collarbone and neck.

"Draco, what do you think you're doing?" Leif snapped, obviously knowing exactly what was causing the marks.

"Making the wrong choice. Come back to me, son," Lucius said.

Draco made to give some kind of explanation or justification only for Alexei to shout in Russian as Severus began to seize.

"Whatever you think you are doing, stop," Leif ordered sharply. "Severus needs you and Harry."

"They're lying. They don't want you. Why else would Harry cut you off?" Lucius questioned.

"I…I don't know where he is," Draco stuttered.

"Find him," Leif ordered harshly.

Swallowing thickly, Draco dashed from the rooms only to pause in the corridor. He'd looked in all the usual spots for Harry, where else was there? How was he supposed to find someone in a massive castle that clearly didn't want to be found?

"Malfoy!"

He turned at the call, seeing Granger and Weasley approaching.

"Is Harry here?" Granger asked.

"No, and I need to find him," Draco told them. "I've looked everywhere he would normally be."

"The map!" Weasley exclaimed in realization. "Can't believe we didn't think of it! Come on!"

Confused, Draco ran after the two Gryffindors as they led the way up to Gryffindor Tower. The password was given and when the Fat Lady began shouting that Draco couldn't enter, Weasley released a flow of colourful language that left the portrait aghast. They hurried up the stairs to Weasley's and Harry's dormitory where the redhead pulled a fold of parchment from a bedside table.

With his wand touching the parchment, Weasley recited, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good."

Black ink slid across the page, creating words and designs. Flags with names followed moving footprints, leaving Draco amazed at the piece of magic. Weasley began unfolding the large parchment and lifting flaps, all three of them scouring the names. With every passing second, Draco grew more and more desperate. Then, Granger found him.

"There!" She pointed to a set of footprints and Harry's name, neither of which were moving. "He's outside?"

Draco didn't wait for more, taking off from Gryffindor Tower. It didn't occur to him as he ran through the castle that a late winter storm had been building all day. Meaning, when he burst outside in nothing but his uniform and he was hit by harsh, heavy snowfall and bitter cold, he was shocked. He began shivering immediately and the snow on the ground sunk into his shoes. He ignored it, however, and ran through the snow to where he'd seen Harry's name on the map. The blizzard was brutal, making it hard to move or see.

"Harry!" he yelled, unsure he could even be heard over the roaring wind.

Eventually, he was at the edge of the forest, not far from the Whomping Willow and where he had seen Harry's name. he trudged along even as his shivering increased, his fingers turned numb, and he felt his eyelashes turn to ice. Yet, when he managed to spot something dark amongst the white snow, he forgot it all.

He hurried forward, instantly knowing the form half buried in snow was Harry. He fell to his knees and dug at the snow. He pulled and tossed it away until he was staring at the blue face of his brother, blood that had flowed from the nose and closed eyes frozen on the skin, and his heart stopped.