TW: Violence.

A/N: It would be cruel for me to leave it at that for too long.

Dame Fortuna

Chapter 11: Loyalty

Edward kept his hand painfully tight around the wheel as he drove them back home. The atmosphere was silent. Tense. But only rightfully so.

He couldn't help but let his eyes dart towards his passenger. She still hadn't moved much, and her small, perfect face still hadn't betrayed much emotion. He supposed shock was fair. This was her first actual…

He knew this would happen at one point. It was the consequence for pulling her in to his life, his world. One day, there would be a tipping point that would change her forever. Completely eradicate the remnants of innocence she once had––the one he'd seen, all those years ago.

"We can talk about it," he whispered.

A long pause. Lifelessly, she murmured, "I just want to go home now, Edward."

He shut his eyes momentarily then, feeling the corners moisten. This…This was the price.

You should've known better. You could've seen a glimpse of the consequences right in front of you.

In the end, it was Carlisle who had warned him, back at that gun range. He was no better than his own father for selfishly keeping a woman––the only woman that mattered––at his side in this type of world. Sooner rather than later, it'll drain the life and love out of them.

And Edward knew he would never be able to forgive himself, just as his father never had.

Earlier

"Carlisle!" Tanya cried with horror, immediately rushing to his side and wrestling his arm to point it away from the girl. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

The man was too strong, though, and his position barely moved despite the blonde's attempts. He kept his cold eyes on Bella as he cocked the gun. "You better start talking, sweetheart."

Bella visibly trembled before him. "Talk? About––About what?"

"You know what."

"Carlisle," Tanya tried again, stepping between them this time. "I beg you to think of what you're doing. If Edward––"

"I'm doing this for him!" Carlisle snapped, his gaze flickering momentarily to his new wife. "My boy's gone soft. This is his mess." Turning back to the other woman, he said, "I knew you were going to be his downfall, Bella Swan, but I never knew it would be in this way. That you'd actually betray him. Who the fuck do you think you are?"

Tanya froze, her expression turning bewildered. Slowly, she turned around to face the brunette. "Bella, what is he talking about?"

"I really don't know," Bella managed, her voice strangled.

"Really?" Carlisle chuckled darkly. "So you're saying the Jotham Press Agency doesn't ring any bells?"

Suddenly, Bella's eyes widened with recognition. Her knees buckled more unsteadily, but she remained upright.

There was a smug glint in the blond's eyes now. He turned momentarily to Tanya. "The girl's been making draft articles with confidential information about Bluewave. From the early weeks. When you were training her."

Tanya's hands curled into fists at her sides. "Edward said…you were a journalist before."

Bella's gaze darted towards the floor, her breathing unsteady now. "They were what they were. My personal drafts, private and not meant for publishing. It was just…practice. I only applied to Club Bluewave because I was having writer's block." She looked up to Tanya, her eyes slowly brimming with tears. "But I stopped. I swear I did, once it all sunk in. I––I must've been saving my files in a common drive with Jotham. That…was where I worked before. In Arizona."

For the first time, Bella watched Tanya shoot her a sharp, furious glare. "You stupid, stupid girl."

"I don't believe a word coming out of that mouth," Carlisle said in a dangerously low tone. "Because your articles were published in conspiracy sites only a few months ago. They were immediately flagged by my legal team. I've spent months tracking and paying off and shooting all leads down. It was a tedious fucking chore. And they all led to you."

"I swear it wasn't me," Bella begged desperately. "I––I don't know who it is––"

"Tanya." The man turned to his wife, putting a hand on her small shoulder. "This is your call. I'm calling him in and it's best this is done with before he comes around."

Bella watched, horrified, as Carlisle handed over the gun to the woman before he casually walked out of the room. Her heart began to beat even more erratically as Tanya steadily raised the gun to point towards Bella's head.

They stood there in tense silence for what felt like forever, both women trembling in their positions.

"God," Tanya whimpered, her brows quivering. "You really fucked up this time, Fortuna. I––I don't know how to help you."

"Please," Bella whispered, clasping her hands together pleadingly. "I'll do anything to prove it. I'm loyal to you. To Edward. Please––anything."

"Wait."

Their heads immediately swiveled towards Carlisle, who was now walking back towards them, a strange expression on his angelic features. He looked Bella over once––as if he was reluctant––before clarifying, "Anything?"

Bella nodded once.

He narrowed his deep cerulean eyes. Slowly, he said, "You'd swear on your life, right now, that you had no intentional hand in this?"

"I swear."

"Hmm." He tilted his head. "If I gave you the chance to prove it, would you follow through? No matter what the cost?"

Bella blinked a couple of times. "I––don't know what you––"

"Yes or no, sweetheart."

She swallowed. "Yes."

Carlisle pursed his lips then, his gaze calculating. Eventually, he took the gun from Tanya's hands. "Remember today, Bella Swan, as the day I showed you uncharacteristic kindness. It'll never happen again. I only ask you pay it forward with your loyalty––at the very least, to my son. Follow me."

Both Bella and Tanya had to drag their feet to work again, struggling to match Carlisle's purposeful pace. He led them silently through the dark hallway and towards a storage room with a metal door in place.

Before Carlisle opened the door fully, he turned to Bella. "This…is my second best lead. Apart from you. And this one claimed he wouldn't talk unless he sees you."

Once they stepped inside, Bella couldn't help but immediately crumple to her knees in front of the familiar figure in the middle of the room, mouth gagged by tape, and hands and legs bound by rope. He was conscious, though, and his warm brown eyes widened as he, too, recognized Bella as soon as she came in.

"No," Bella whimpered, burying her face in her hands. "No, no, no."

"Prove it," Carlisle ordered simply, leaning against the window at the far end of the room. He pulled out a cigarette box from his pocket and lit a stick leisurely.

Tanya slowly walked over to the bound prisoner, kneeling before him and gently pulling off the tape over his mouth. "I…know this one."

"Bella," Jasper was finally able to say, his voice hoarse. "It's you."

"What did you do?" she cried, looking up at him with tears in her eyes.

"I––I had to try," he groaned, writhing uncomfortably.

"You had no obligation," Bella whimpered. "I've told you that so many times. You should've known––How––Why?"

"I tried everything, even when I got back home," he sighed, leaning his head back onto the floor. "Called everyone. Jotham mentioned you were still active in the drive, and I saw…I had to try. To take you away from this place."

Carlisle released his drag with a deep sigh.

Bella wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Is that enough proof?"

A pause. "Yes. And it's time to follow through."

She couldn't help but release a sharp wail, pulling her knees towards her as she did.

"Carlisle," Tanya murmured solemnly, standing back up. "One more kindness, sweetheart. Do it yourself. Or…even let me."

Carlisle stood up straight, tucking the cigarette between his lips as he walked over to the center of the room. He narrowed his eyes pensively at the trembling man on the floor. "Hmm. I think I remember this one, too."

Before he could point the gun to Jasper's head, however, Bella said, "Wait."

He raised a brow as the girl stood back up unsteadily to her feet, her moist face now devoid of any emotion. Her gaze was blank as she opened a palm in his direction. "This is my fault. I deserve to do it myself."

Carlisle pursed his lips. "You're not going to do anything stupid, are you?"

"I'm sure you can still easily take me down if I try," she said calmly, her gaze still fixed on Jasper's figure. "Grant me your trust this one time. And I promise I won't ever break it again."

The older man ran a hand through his hair exasperatedly before giving in and handing her the revolver. As he did, he leaned down to whisper in her ear, "Do it for Edward, if nothing else."

Bella kept her jaw painfully clenched as she slowly pointed the gun to Jasper––her first real love, the only man who mattered that way in her past life.

Despite the grave situation, the blond managed a weak smile. "I never really knew who you were, Bella Swan, did I?"

"You really didn't," she choked, pulling on the safety lock.

"Regardless," he sighed, his whole body leaning back in defeat on the ground, "I still love you."

Bella released a sharp breath. "And I really wish you didn't."

Bang.

"No!"

Bella's position remained frozen as she watched the life leave the body of Jasper Hale, his beautiful blond locks now being rapidly mixed with red. And she remembered seeing the same sight, several years ago, with a loved one in a past life––

This time, there was no sharp pain. Just…emptiness. Perhaps being the one to pull the trigger––finally being the one in full control of the cruelty of the world––made all the difference.

What did that mean, then? What did that make her?

She must've stood there, completely motionless, for more than ten minutes. She couldn't even process the physical altercation that was occurring behind her, as her loud gunshot left behind an almost unending high-pitched humming in her ears.

"––kill you, you bastard!" she eventually vaguely heard Edward cry from somewhere to her left. She couldn't really…move. It was a chore to even blink.

"––made the choice––"

"––cleaning up the fucking mess you made––"

"––never should've trusted––"

"––involved Tanya again in your––"

"––not your call anymore––"

"––fucked me over in the first place––"

"Stop."

She didn't recall moving, but she found herself between the two––alive––men in the room, her hand still limply carrying the revolver at her side. Her other hand was raised in Edward's direction.

"Bella," Edward murmured, dropping his own gun as his hands reached out to hold her gently by the shoulders. "Please…You shouldn't have––"

"I had to," she said automatically. "This wasn't your mess. It's mine. So I cleaned it up."

Bella then turned around to face the two blondes, both of which were eyeing her cautiously.

"Congratulations," she said, managing a small smile. "I hope this means I've fully regained your trust, and that we will have no more problems working together moving forward."

Carlisle's eyes turned downcast, and he said nothing.

"Bella," Edward tried again, his voice more strangled this time. "I'm so sorry––"

"Let's go home," she said simply, dropping the gun and walking out the door without another word, and without once looking back at the irreversible mess she'd made.

Present

Carlisle sat at the edge of his large bed, still wearing his dress shirt and slacks from the events earlier. He was generally motionless, apart from the slow tapping of his clasped fingers propped on his lap.

"He'll forgive you."

He didn't bother looking up at Tanya, but let her sit next to him and place a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"I know," he eventually murmured, his gaze still fixed on the carpet. "He always does in the end. No matter what I've done."

"Then what's on your mind?"

He sighed, his eyes fluttering shut as he did. "It just––fucks me up sometimes. I've always tried to deny it, to point out all the things that make us different. I call him weak and reckless. But in the end, he's no different than me at all."

Tanya's hand rubbed his shoulder soothingly.

"He may eventually forgive me, but he'll never be able to forgive himself," he said, shaking his head slowly. "He loves that woman. It's a currency we can't afford."

Her hand gradually stopped its movement, but she remained silent.

"I can't offer you what I know you seek," Carlisle continued, finally turning to face her. "I want to make that clear, at the very least."

"I know," Tanya said. "I think I have enough love for the both of us."

She stood up before him, shrugging off the sheer robe around her body, leaving her completely bare. At the very least, his eyes lighted up faintly as he regarded her. She was his favorite, after all. That was enough.

"But you've also changed, Carlisle," she murmured, placing a gentle hand on his cheek. "You had no obligation to save me this way. You could've left me to rot."

"I did for several months, as you'd pointed out," he said, pulling the girl by the waist to sit on his lap. He left a few gentle, languid kisses on her chest before saying, "But since I'm coming home anyway, I thought it best to cross out one thing from my conscience."

She lifted him by the chin to face her. There was a sweet smile on her plump lips. "There it is."

He narrowed his eyes.

"A conscience," she whispered, before she leaned down to kiss her husband.

Edward didn't come to bed that night. He sat in the chaise lounge of the living room, his eyes fixed on the metal rod across from him as he finished his fourth glass of wine.

He was surprised, then, when she suddenly came from the shower, clad in nothing but a white bathrobe. He'd assumed she wouldn't want to talk, not for a long time. That this was quite possibly their point of no return.

He couldn't even have the strength to look her straight in the eyes, and merely watched from his peripheral vision as she approached slowly, until she stood between him and the pole.

"Come to bed with me," she murmured.

Edward's gaze looked up to her then, and his heart twisted at the sight of her soft expression. Despite… "I'm sorry, Bella."

Her jaw tightened. "You didn't seem surprised enough."

"About what?"

"That––he had to die," Bella managed, her face betraying pain for a split-second. "You didn't ask a lot of questions. Like you'd…expected it."

Edward clasped his hands together and he hung his head. "I knew from the moment I let that man go all those months ago that he was going to be a problem. Eventually. He was––I knew the type. He was too angry and unrelenting."

"Then why did you let him go?"

His eyes flashed up to hers in disbelief. Her expression remained the same. "What do you mean?"

Her voice was firmer this time as she asked, "If you knew all the way back then that he was going to do something stupid, why did you hesitate?"

He couldn't help but scoff lightly. "Are you telling me I should've…killed him off earlier myself?"

Her face hardened and it seemed as if she wasn't going to respond at all. But after several long seconds, she whispered, "Was it for my sake? Or yours?"

Edward stood up swiftly then, stepping forward until he towered over the girl. His breaths came out heavy as he said, "Every decision I make has you in mind."

"That's a lie."

Edward widened his eyes, regarding her suddenly cold expression. "Excuse me?"

"You never ask," Bella said, her voice going dangerously shrill. "You never tell me anything. No matter how many times I beg. This––I'm only so fucking angry with you because you never really pulled me in.

"You could've told me about your father. You could've told me why you've been so cruel to Tanya. And you think this is better? For me to be constantly blindsided with situations where I'm forced to make a split-second decision to prove myself to you? You think this is for me?"

Bella was crying now. Edward swallowed deeply and placed his hands firmly on her shoulders. "I was only trying––"

"If you tell me this is for my protection one more time, Edward, I swear to God," she swore, her voice suddenly dangerously low. "Tonight was a clear indication that you've done a pretty shitty job doing that."

"What the fuck do you suppose I do then?" Edward snapped, his hand grabbing her by the jaw.

She released a slow breath, her eyes now wide and manic. "I want you to drag me down to hell with you, Edward Cullen."

His hand moderately tightened around her face, trembling as it did.

"To the very pits of fucking hell," she whispered, her hand reaching up to caress his. "I hope I've proved my loyalty to you tonight. I would kill anyone for you. Even die for you. So please, let me in. On all of it."

For some reason, his thoughts wandered to when he'd first crossed paths with her, so many years ago. Her innocent, wide eyes. Her meek, peaceful smile. Back when she was untainted from the cruelty of the world.

She's dead, Edward, she'd warned him.

And he'd accepted her, just as she was.

"Bella…I love you," he croaked after what felt like forever, his lips quivering as his hand left her jaw to cup the side of her face. He'd never said it before. He'd thought it would be clear regardless. But even just saying the words––It was a release. The final screw of a dam coming loose.

Bella's smile was just as sweet as it always was. "I love you," she whispered back. "Until the very end of the line."

He pulled her close to him, pressing his forehead against hers. "Forever," he agreed.