Chapter 3

Daniel escorted Steve into the base and to the observation room. As he opened the door he spoke to Steve, "We have them in here."

Steve stepped in behind Daniel. He noticed people watching from above in the observation room. He recognized Jack, Sam and Teal'c but did not recognize the General. His eyes then landed on the minions. He dropped to his knees before the other minions who stared at the stranger. He spoke, "Bello, Kevin, Stuart, Bob…" he gave a half smile to his long lost family.

Kevin cocked slightly in suspicion. He carefully approached for this man did not like a minion. Then he looked into the one aspect that did not change and that was color of Steve's eyes. Then it clicked that Steve was somehow turned into a human by the Eye. "Steve!" he greeted and wrapped his small arms around him.

Stuart and Bob followed suit and cheered his return. In short time, all twelve minions were surrounding Steve and trying to hug him. They cheered and jumped up and down excited to have their brother back even if he looked much different.

General Hammond looked at Jack standing beside him in the observation room above. "What do you make of this, Colonel?"

"Steve is a minion." he concluded. "He's one of them."

Sam wondered, "If he is one of them then why does he look like us?"

Teal'c suggested "Perhaps, Steve can answer that question."

A slight smile crept across Sam's face as she looked upon the reunion. "They are happy to see him. Look at the little one with the teddy bear. Gotta admit, minions are kind of cute."

Teal'c raised an eyebrow at the remark as Jack gave an amused look.

Daniel made his way to the observation area leaving Steve with the other minions in the room below. He spoke as he entered, "How is it going up here?"

Jack pointed out the glasses, "What is going on down there?"

Daniel came to the glass and looked below. "It turns out Steve is one of them. He's from another reality where those things exist and have existed a long time. He said he got sucked into the Eye of Horus and it spit him out here. When he emerged he was human. He said he used to look like them."

Jack cocked an eye, "Little yellow pills shaped things?"

"Minions." he nodded. "They number in the thousands and are 60 million years old. They are immortal."

"Seriously!" Jack gasped.

He nodded, "I want to see what I can find on any legends of these creatures we might have. Steve said he looked but did not find any minions here. So, I wonder why they don't exist in our reality."

Sam noted, "They are not vicious and seem pretty civilized. Maybe we can start a dialog with them and get to know what these minions are."

"Carter?" Jack asked alarmed.

"Come on, sir. Look how cute they are…And we got to know Steve. He's harmless. I bet these…minions…are just like us." she suggested.

Jack suggested, "They are called minions for a reason."

"And what is that reason?" she argued.

"I don't know yet but that's not a name you causally give out." he insisted.

Hammond stated, "I want a briefing with Steve and the leader of the minions. In 15 minutes."

"Yes sir." Jack acknowledged.

Briefing Room, 15 minutes Later

Steve walked into the briefing room behind Kevin, Stuart and Bob while the rest of the minions remained in the observation room. Upon entering the minions spied SG-1 sitting at the table with General Hammond and Dr. Janet Frasier. The three smaller minions climbed onto their chairs much like a child would and Steve, being human, sat down normally.

Kevin was the obvious leader of the group. He looked over at his host. "Bello." he greeted.

Daniel took the lead as he knew how to speak minion. "Hello. You are Kevin, correct?"

"Kevin LaMinion." he confirmed.

Stuart introduced himself, "Stuart LaMinion."

Bob didn't speak at first for he was captivated by the pretty blonde haired woman sitting across from him. His imagination ran wild and music played in his head as he day dreamed about Sam Carter running through a field of flowers in a yellow dress and blowing kisses his way.

Stuart smacked Bob upside the head.

Bob came out of his day dream and gave Stuart a dirty look. "Whaat?"

"Yeahit to suk." he told him to introduce himself.

Bob spoke to the audience, "Bob LaMinion." He then blinked and smiled ever so dreamily at Sam as he held his teddy bear tight.

Sam found little Bob most adorable. He was small and round and carried a teddy bear much like a child. In Sam's mind, Bob was a child who happened to be a minion. She had no idea what a minion truly could become. She smiled at Bob, "It's nice to meet you, Bob." She then added, "That teddy bear is so adorable."

Bob held the bear tighter as he gave a starry eyed sigh. He wasn't sure if Sam was after his teddy bear or not but being a minion he was not about to give it up.

Hammond got down to business. "What is the situation with the mirror SG-2 found, Major?"

Sam reported, "It can receive but not send. It will take time to fix it."

"Work on it." he instructed. "What is this Eye of Horus that you claim that brought you here, Steve?"

He replied, "It's a bowling ball that can suck you inside, mix you up and spit you back out in another world."

"Where did it come from?" he asked.

Steve looked to his fellow minions. They spoke in minion for a bit between themselves. Steve stated, "Ra had it back in Ancient Egypt. Ra wasn't very nice to us. He betrayed us and tried to feed us to the crocodiles. So, we got rid of Ra. He left in a ship but he left a lot of loot behind. Our best guess is it was left behind by the first humans that came here. The boring ones who built the Star Gate."

Daniel clarified, "You were in Ancient Egypt when Ra ruled?"

The minions all nodded along with Steve.

Kevin stated, "Ra jerk. Pem corro lom dak."

Jack asked, "What did he say, Daniel?"

"That Ra was a jerk and so they ran him off." he replied.

"Ra is dead." Jack informed the minions.

Steve asked, "How?"

"We blew him and his ship up." he stated as he too had no love for Ra.

General Hammond agreed, "Colonel O'Neill neutralized Ra on the first dial out. Ra is no threat anymore."

Kevin, Stuart and Bob all looked upon Jack with a gleam in their eyes. Jack destroyed Ra, one of the great enemies of the minions. They sat rather impressed.

Stuart looked to his brothers, "Boss?"

Kevin agreed, "Boss."

Jack cocked an eyebrow, "Boss? What are they talking about, Steve?"

"Minions like a leader who is tough. You defeating Ra makes you…badass…to us minions. They want you to be their boss." he explained.

Bob shook his head, "Steve be boss."

Steve refused, "I don't think I can do that. I have a job already. I'm a contractor. I've been living as a human so long, I am used to my life the way it is now." He then had to agree, "Jack would make a good boss while you guys are here."

Kevin grew alarmed, "Po bok camion." He pleaded for him to go back home with them.

"Gru won't want me around." he shook his head. "Humans don't like that kind of competition. I will have to stay here. Besides, I got Daniel as my brother now. He's my brother!"

Unbeknownst to Daniel that once a minion adopts you as a brother all the minions adopt you as a brother. He gave Steve an assuring smile, "Thanks for that, Steve."

Stuart stated, "Daniel LaMinion."

Kevin and Bob both agreed.

Daniel came to attention, "I'm not a minion."

Bob climbed down from his chair and walked over to Daniel. He asserted, "Daniel LaMinion." He then pulled out the most prized offer a minion could make to another minion, a banana from his bib overall's pocket. "Banana."

Daniel winced as he took the fruit that had been in a pocket. "Thanks," he made a face. He didn't understand that upon accepting the offer he was now a member of the tribe and a minion.

Steve explained, "For a minion a banana is the best thing ever. We don't offer a banana to just any human. You accepted it so that means, you are now a member of our tribe. You are seen as a minion by the others."

He glared, "Why didn't you tell me that before I took the banana, Steve?"

"I don't know." he shrugged it off. "You are my brother to me anyways so…once a minion, always a minion."

General Hammond's mind churned with what to do with the minions in the S.G.C.. He came up with a plan. "Colonel O'Neill. You will be taking charge of the minions. Keep them out of trouble."

He balked, "What am I supposed to do with them?"

"We served Napoleon's Army. We know basic military drills and war theory." Steve informed.

Jack huffed, "Napoleon lost."

Kevin rolled his eyes, "Sonhup miscalculation."

Jack looked to Daniel, "What did he say?"

"Slight miscalculation." he informed.

Stuart agreed, "Cannon."

Kevin shrugged, "Cannon…boom…"

General Hammond insisted, "Just keep them busy, Colonel. I'm sure you can find a way to do that."

"Yes sir." he agreed. He then looked to Steve, "Any suggestions?"

"Basic training and play games." he guessed. "Are there anymore like Ra out there?"

Daniel confirmed, "Yes! There are more Goa'uld."

"Goa'uld." Kevin made a made sour face.

"Linda vus." Bob suggested.

Jack looked to Daniel again.

"Bob wants to get them…the Goa'uld. They don't like the Goa'uld." he quickly assessed.

Jack figured, "I guess we got something in common."

Janet spoke up, "I want to run some basic medical test on one of the minions and Steve and compare them. Maybe we can figure out what exactly a minion is and how that Eye of Horus can affect people."

"Good idea." Hammond stated.

The minions all looked to Jack. He asked, "What?"

"Boss." Bob stated.

Daniel figured, "You have to pick one of them to go with Janet."

He rolled his eyes annoyed, "Oh' for crying out loud. Fine, the little one with the teddy bear can go."

"That's Bob." Daniel reminded him.

"Bob can go." he insisted.

Sam volunteered, "I can help Janet run the test."

Bob saw an opportunity to spend time with his new crush. He melted, "Okay."

Unbeknownst to Jack, the grumpier he became the more the minions liked him as the new boss. He was on course to rival Gru as the next minion master.