Summary: Why Hermione chose to teach, and another guest speaker for the students.
A/N: Cheers to CeliaEquus who suggested perhaps George Weasley would be someone good to give a talk to the students.
Chapter 12
Hermione entered Severus' lab.
"I got your Owl," she said as she came in.
He smirked at her. "I see that."
She rolled her eyes and shook her head at him.
"What's up?" she asked.
He motioned for her to sit by the nearest table. "I know it's been a couple of weeks, but I didn't forget about your scar," he said as he pointed at her wrist.
"Oh, I didn't think you had."
He nodded. "It was a bit more challenging than I expected. I found a counter curse, but it also needs a potion to be worked into it before the spell is cast."
"Wait, you found something?"
"I did just say that."
"It's just… Well, the Healers said there was nothing."
He nodded. "I know. But they aren't as experienced with Dark Magic as I am, nor do they have access to Dark texts."
He motioned to the potion on the table. It was a pearlescent yellow.
"You'll need to rub that into the scar, wait ten minutes, then re-apply it."
Hermione reached out and picked up the vial. Looking up at Severus, she smiled at him.
"Thank you for finding this," she said softly as she unstoppered the vial.
He nodded and watched her rub the potion into her wrist. Flicking his wand, a timer was set. He turned to her and asked her how classes had been.
She shrugged. "They were fine. No one hexed anyone, which is always a plus."
He smirked. "So, you didn't hex anyone either?"
"Severus! I would never hex a student!"
"Of course not," he said blandly.
She smiled at him and shook her head. "You know me better than that." She got a contemplative look on her face. "Several students have said they got a lot out of my talk at the assembly, and others have said they're thankful that the faculty is doing this. Mr. Jordan said it helped him to have a better understanding of what happened during the war." She chuckled. "He said he'd give me a chance as a Muggle-born."
Severus chuckled. "He is the cockiest sixth-year in the school. And it's not just because he's a Slytherin. I think the boy was born with a feeling of superiority and being a Pure-blood just encouraged him."
Hermione laughed. "He's definitely full of himself, but I will say, he's always been very respectful to me, even before I spoke. And the fact he's willing to try and see a different view is promising."
"Let's hope they all do that," Severus agreed.
Looking down at her wrist, she got a curious look on her face. "How did you know where to look to find this remedy?"
He regarded her thoughtfully before answering. Deciding to be frank, he told her.
"I went to the Lestrange Manor and went through their library."
"You mean anyone can just go to their abandoned home and browse their Dark texts?"
He shook his head. "No, it's carefully warded. I spoke with Draco, and he gave me license to examine the books in the hopes I could help you."
She paled. "You told him about this?"
"No. No, Hermione. I just said that I was interested in countercurses to his Aunt's bizarre spells."
Relaxing, she nodded. "Thank you for not saying anything to him. I'd rather not have him know anything about it. I mean, he was there, but it's hateful and disgusting, and I'd rather not have him know it bothers me."
He reached out and grasped her hand. "You shouldn't be embarrassed by it. It wasn't your fault."
"I know, it's just that…"
He squeezed her hand, urging her to explain herself.
"I fight being a Muggleborn every day. I don't need an epithet emblazoned on my wrist to remind me and everyone else just how inferior I am."
"Hermione, you are not inferior. If anything, you are so much more adept than your peers and those who are your elders. You are a formidable witch."
She gave him a wan smile. "I know that, but everyone makes assumptions, you know? Sure, I was involved with the war and Harry, but it isn't possible that I could have really made a difference because of my status."
"Ridiculous. Anyone who holds that opinion obviously doesn't know you, nor do they have any intelligence. They're all dunderheads."
"I agree with you, but some of those dunderheads hold high positions and are people who make big decisions."
"Is that why you chose to teach?"
Hermione frowned and looked down at the table. Severus let her hand go, realizing he'd been holding it for an inordinate amount of time.
"Partly. Right after the war, Kingsley invited Ron, Harry, and I to come to the Ministry and discuss possible jobs. I have no desire to be an Auror, so he brought me around to a couple of departments he thought I might enjoy. They did interest me, but the heads of the departments I spoke with all treated me like an imbecile."
"Tell me their names, they will suddenly come down with dragon pox."
She chuckled. "Thanks for that, but it doesn't really matter anymore. I was furious for days, though. Realizing that the Ministry wasn't the right move for me, I thought about other things I could do. Teaching seemed to be the right decision. I really do enjoy this job, Severus, and I'm kind of glad that I had such a horrid experience with the Ministry. I don't think it would have been as fulfilling as I find this to be."
"You're sure you don't want me to poison someone? It won't kill them, I promise you."
She laughed. "No, Severus! I can take care of myself."
"I have no doubt of that."
At that moment the Tempus charm rang and Hermione applied another round of the salve.
"Anyway," she continued. "It's been the right move for me."
"Idiots, all of them…"
"Severus, it's okay. I mean, of course, it isn't, but It will take some time to change ideologies. The war helped, but things just don't change overnight."
"I fell into that line of thinking in my youth. I never used that awful word after my fifth year, but the prejudice took more time to overcome."
Hermione met his gaze. "What changed your mind?"
"It's interesting. As a child–before Hogwart–I didn't think there was much difference between Muggleborns and other bloodlines. At Hogwarts, the Slytherins educated me on the right way of thinking. I didn't give Muggleborns much mind aside from Lily. Knowing her, I thought she was just an anomaly. My friends seemed to know so much about Muggleborns that I just believed everything that was said. My father didn't help. He was a Muggle bastard, enforcing the thought that anything coming from Muggles had to be foul. Aside from Lily, my early experiences with Muggleborns didn't really convince me otherwise. It wasn't until I started teaching that I realized that Muggle-borns were just as capable, if not more so, than everyone else. I'm ashamed it took me that long to figure it out, but I had been indoctrinated pretty seriously."
"I'm sorry."
"There's nothing to be sorry about. I wanted to be accepted, so I accepted false information to fit in. Once I realized how the Dark Lord really was, it was easier to open my eyes to his lies as well."
"I don't know how easy it was. I mean, your colleagues never came to that conclusion."
"That is because they aren't very smart, except for Lucius, who's just a giant bigot."
Hermione looked at him as if he'd lost his mind. He stared at her blankly before cracking a huge grin.
"Kidding. But many of them really weren't that savvy, and they ate up the idea that they were better than others."
The timer went off again, so Hermione looked at him expectantly.
"All right, let me see your wrist," he directed.
Reaching out, she let him take it. He examined what the lotion had done. The redness had virtually disappeared, but the word was still very visible.
"Good, it is supposed to look like this." He looked up at her. "I'll say the spell and hopefully it will completely remove the remnants of the scar."
She straightened and nodded. He pulled his wand out and pointed it at her wrist.
"Sana," he chanted.
Golden light shot from his wand and was absorbed into the word on Hermione's wrist. It glowed for a second before disappearing into her skin. The word disappeared, leaving only her pristine skin. Hermione gasped and pulled her hand out of Severus', running her fingers over where the evil word had been carved into her. She looked up at Severus with tears in her eyes.
"Oh, Severus. You did it. Thank you!"
She stood and raced around the table, giving him a hug. He was surprised by her overt show of emotions, but inside it warmed him. He gingerly moved his arms around her and returned her affection. She pulled back, and he saw the tears in her eyes. Lifting his hand, he carefully wiped the one that was sliding down her cheek.
"Talk to me. Why the tears?"
"I never thought I would be rid of it. It's always made me feel inferior and ugly."
"Hermione." He grasped her hand and enveloped it in both of his. "It was just a blemish. It didn't make you any different than you've always been."
"I know… it's just… that's how it made me feel. And it was a constant reminder of being tortured by her."
He squeezed her hand. "It is gone now. You can put it behind you."
She broke free of his grasp and hugged him again. "Thank you so much."
ooo
Another assembly was upon them. Minerva had reached out to George Weasley, and he'd agreed to address the school. He entered the Great Hall and made his way up to the Head table area. He rushed up to Hermione and hugged her from behind.
"Hey you! We miss you at home," he said.
Hermione stood up and hugged him fully. "George! How are you?"
He pulled back and shrugged. "Getting better–slowly."
Hermione gave him a sympathetic look. "I wish things had been different."
"Not more than I do."
Hermione motioned for him to take the seat next to her, and they began to catch up on the family.
"How's your mum and dad doing?"
"Still mourning of course, but they have other kids to worry about. They're also hoping they'll be planning a wedding soon." He waggled his eyebrows at her.
"Don't look at me! I'm not marrying into your family."
George chuckled. "I was talking about Ginny and Harry."
Hermione sighed in relief and shook her head at him. "Well, I'm sure that will happen soon if Harry has anything to do with it."
George grinned. "That will be a good thing. It will give everyone something to concentrate on other than Fred's loss."
Hermione sobered and nodded. Minerva came over to greet George at that moment.
"Oh, Mr. Weasley, so good to see you. You're looking too thin!"
"Professor!" George cried. "I hear enough of that from my mum."
"Well, she's right. Are you ready?"
George sighed. "As ready as I'm going to be."
Nodding at George, she made her way to the podium as Severus turned to him.
"It's good to see you, Mr. Weasley."
George gave him a dubious look. "Really?"
"Of course. I was saddened to hear of your brother. He was a good man, and you both were decent students until you up and left."
"Mmm, well, it worked out until the battle. Now I don't know what to do with the shop."
Severus gazed at him curiously. "You should keep it, Mr. Weasley. It brings happiness to so many. Take the time you need to mourn, but do reopen it."
"Thanks… I wouldn't expect you to say anything like that."
"Well, I don't have to be an arse anymore."
"I didn't think that would stop you."
"Now, now, Mr. Weasley."
"George, Severus has worked hard to change his persona."
"Oh, it's Severus, is it?" George asked slyly.
Hermione spluttered. "We're colleagues, you dork. Now shut up."
"Yes, ma'am."
They turned their attention to Minerva, who had tapped her wand on the stand to get attention.
"Students, today we have a former student to address us. George Weasley was a student here several years ago. He is owner of Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes in Diagon Alley. Some of you probably remember him and his twin Fred, who was sadly lost in the war. He is here to describe what it's like when a family member is lost in battle."
She nodded at George, who rose and moved to the podium. Minerva shook his hand as they switched places. George took his place and looked out over the students. He sighed and looked down before beginning.
"Those of you who know me understand that I love attention and enjoy being the life of the party. However, I dread this interaction with you because it is on a topic I've avoided speaking about since it happened."
He cleared his throat. "Many of you know I am a twin. I fought beside my brother, Fred, during the war. We thought we were invincible together. That nothing would ever tear us apart, and that we were bound to win the war and–ahem–Voldemort–would lose. Some of those things were true, but unfortunately, my brother and I weren't invincible. Fred was struck down when a wall exploded from a Death Eater attack. The thing is, I wasn't even there. I was fighting across the castle and never knew what happened until it was… too late. I didn't have the chance to even try to save him. From my understanding, there was nothing that could have been done, but I still wonder every day if I could have saved him… or taken his place."
George gulped heavily and tried to gather his emotions.
"But I'm not here to go into detail of his death. Professor McGonagall asked me to speak on living with that death and to be very open on how I'm coping. If you must know, I'm not coping. I don't know who of you lost family members in the war, but if you did, know that I understand. Words can't express the grief that I feel–the loneliness and simply feeling bereft.
"For those of you who know me, I used to always be chipper and upbeat, but since Fred was killed… It's been hard to keep that up. I smile less, I don't know that I've joked around much since then. Maybe once or twice. It's hard to feel joy now. Joy has always been wrapped up in playing off Fred. Now he's gone, and I'm all alone. Even if I do want to joke around…" he sobbed. "My wingman is gone."
He put his hand up to his eyes, wiping the tears from them, but they still came. It took him a few minutes to compose himself and go on.
"I find I'm a bit lost." His voice cracked as he spoke. "Not only do I grieve the loss of my brother, but I'm not sure what to do with our business. I haven't reopened since the war, and I question whether reopening would bring me comfort or more misery."
A hand shot up from the Ravenclaw table. George nodded at the student.
"Please, sir, reopen. Everyone loved going to your shop when they were in Diagon Alley, especially during the week we shop for our school supplies. It would be sad if we couldn't return."
George nodded at her and looked at the rest of the students. "Do you all feel this way?"
The entire room cheered. He smirked at them.
"Perhaps reopening can be to honor Fred. I'll have to think on it."
Looking down at the podium again, he gathered his thoughts again.
"I struggle daily to feel positive. I have spoken with my parents, and we have grieved together, and they have given me some lovely advice. I am also meeting with a counselor. She's helped me to see light at the end of the tunnel. But I suppose what I want to end with is advice to those who are struggling among you. It will ease, but it takes a long time. My counselor tells me to take it day by day, and I've found that to be helpful. She also says that it's okay to cry about losing Fred. It's okay to feel miserable as long as after a while I lift my head and notice the good things around me. I will admit, in those first weeks it was almost impossible to do so, but I feel it's getting better as I try to do this.
"Professor McGonagall told me you have a counselor here at school. Take advantage of him. He's there to help. It's not going to go away overnight, but he can give you some hints on how to cope.
"I will miss my brother every day for the rest of my life. I'm working to be able to function with that grief and live my life in the way he'd want. He'd probably tell me to stop feeling sorry for myself, we have a business to run. I hope that I can get to that point sometime soon."
He nodded at everyone and returned to his seat. Hermione reached out and squeezed his hand as Minerva concluded.
"Thank you, Mr. Weasley, that was very profound. To George's point, if you are struggling with the loss of a family member, or just struggling with the things that happened during the war, please seek out Counselor Barton. He is here to help. You are dismissed. As usual, take twenty minutes then report to your next class."
The students rose and filed out. Hermione squeezed George's hand again.
"You okay?"
George laughed ruefully. "No, but I'm getting better."
"I'm so sorry. Losing Fred was hard on all of us, but I can't imagine what you're going through."
George stared straight ahead and nodded. "I hope to find happiness again. It's just still so hard."
Hermione leaned in and hugged him. "I know I'm far away, but if you ever want to meet up and chat, I'm here for you."
"Thanks, Hermione. I appreciate that." He rose and nodded to Severus. He went up to Minerva and shook her hand before leaving the Great Hall. Hermione watched him, batting away tears.
"Are you all right?" Severus asked.
She gave him a half smile and nodded. "I just wish there was a way to ease his grief."
"Mmm, that would be helpful, but sadly there isn't."
"If there were, perhaps we wouldn't grow the way we do from these trials," Jonathan added.
"Perhaps. It's just so hard to see people suffering," Hermione noted.
"Indeed," Severus replied.
Hermione looked over at Severus. "I can't imagine how hard it was for you when Lily died."
"It was… difficult."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be. You were what… two at the time?"
"You know what I mean," Hermione told him.
His eyes strayed to her. "I do, and thank you. I don't want to talk about it here or now."
"Of course," Hermione acquiesced.