"Snitches get stitches," Nerissa said, continuing to stir her Polyjuice brew for 30 more counts.
"B-but boo-boos don't get smoo-smoos."
"Shut up will you? You're acting like a big dunderhead." Nerissa threw a bunch of Fluxweed stalks at her annoying, stupid brother's head. "You better not tell mum."
Edward bit his lip and nodded, but when mum called them to supper, his resolve faded and he burst into tears.
Hermione made no great fret about it in the moment, but the moment her Lord Prince-Husband Floo-d home, she was a ball of needles and pricks.
Severus Snape nodded and hung up his robes. He washed his hands for exactly five minutes, up to the wrists, ate dinner, took a long shower and poured himself a finger of Firewhiskey before settling down in his favorite chair when his Witch-Dearest burst into his library.
"Hermione." He placed one finger on his forehead. "We agreed that the household prattle will be dealt with after my reading."
That was his first mistake.
The moment that finger went down, the witch burst into an even louder and more pointed tone.
"Don't you shush me," she snarled. "Our children were called Mudbloods, no less, at their so-called Godfather's house."
"Lucius Malfoy's?"
"Do we know any others?!"
"Answer. The. Question."
Hermione harrumphed. "Yes, at the Malfoys'."
"And you have proof of this?"
"You have met the Malfoys." She rolled her eyes. "No."
"No?"
"Oh Eddie wouldn't lie about such things." Hermione came and sat by his side and stroked his arm. She knew quite well what effect that had on Severus.
And she was right! Nerissa was daddy's little devil by and by, but dear Edward was softer than a Pygmy Puff. And the amalgamation of wife and son melted Severus' stone little heart into a puddle of goo.
"You know very well how I feel about the M-Word," he said slowly.
"So, we will have a word with him?"
Severus simply kissed her head.
-x-x-x-
Up until tonight, Nerissa thought Godfather Lucius was the coolest wizard in the world. That was until her dad took her down to the basement of Spinner's End.
He waved his hand thrice around the snakes on the door and they slithered away to open the padlock.
Nerissa gasped. This room was filled with a glowing green light that illuminated a bunch of really old and really dark stuff.
"Whose is this? Not Grandpa's?!" Nerissa's grandpa was a Muggle and not a very good one, judging by the fact that he was dead well before her time.
"No, my little viper," Severus placed one hand on her shoulders. "This is all mine."
Nerissa picked up a silver mask with slits on the mouth and placed it over her face. Her dad held her hand firmly.
"Can I try it on?"
He shook his head. "The mask is fitted only to me." He walked her over to anouther chest and opened it, pulling out a long piece of fabric.
"What's that?" She slipped it on her shoulders, her body instantly vanishing. "No way! I thought only Harry Potter had one of these!"
Severus winced. "Not anymore." He handed her a werewolf head with the teeth still attached and a matching pelt. "What do you say to a bit of...guising?"
Nerissa nodded, big eyed, and slipped on the pelt. "Do we have to bring Ed?"
Severus shook his head.
He himself donned long velvet green robes and a cane. "You've finished with the Polyjuice Potion?"
Nerissa paled, but her daddy placed a hand on her shoulder. "We won't tell your mother about that."
Nerissa fetched the Potion and Severus added two mysterious hairs to the mix and downed it. The result was an odd looking pale man with white hair and a haughty expression.
"You look like Godfather Malfoy," Nerissa said, and then, she understood. Her lips curved into a clever little grin that was inbred in all Snapes.
-x-x-x-
Lucius spent the evening pacing back and forth in his study. He should not have let slip such a foul truth, not before Severus' children. The man went berserk over the mention of 'Mudbloods', even though it was the technical wizarding term for those kinds of magic folk.
The boy, Edward, wouldn't know his head from his arse, but the girl...oh he didn't trust that God-daughter of his. She was a gentle reminder that maybe Lucius should not have paid his lawyers to bail Severus out of Azkaban.
Yet, the time passed, and a Howler had not arrived at his doorstep.
Pouring himself a glass of burgundy, he settled on his favourite chaise lounge and summoned his latest House-Elf, Dobby #3, to burn his fingers in the fireplace for some infraction of his.
The smell of the fingers and the tasteless-ness of the smooth burgundy lulled Lucius into a trance. At the ring finger on Dobby #3's right hand, he just began to doze off when the shutters of his windows shook and flew open. The curtains danced in a mad fury and leaves scattered over the marble floor.
Dobby #3 yelped and disappeared out of sight.
Two figures entered the room, by backlight of the moon, both glowed like the incarnations of evil. One was a canine creature and the other...
"F-F-F-Father?!" Lucius blubbered, sliding off the chaise.
"You've disappointed me," his father said, crossing his hands over on his signature viper cane. Beside him, the werewolf growled. "Bisclavret smells filth off your robes."
The werewolf approached and sniffed him all over.
"O-Oh, just a bit of raiding."
"Please." Abraxus waved his gloved hand in the air. "You never had a stomach for that. As for your desire for flesh."
Lucius paled. "I-I married into Pureblood, l-like I promised-"
"And what of your little playthings on the side? Don't think I haven't noticed. You do know what would happen if you just...slip up and have an accident?"
Lucius swallowed. "I am very cautious."
"Choose better, son. I don't desire to see the bloodline muddled with your filthy exploits."
And then, like that, Abraxus and Bisclavret dissapeared into the night. Lucius looked down at the wet patch on his pants. No, it wasn't wine.
-x-x-x-
They took off their robes and their masks and locked them up in the basement. Nerissa gave her dad a huge hug.
"This was the best Hallowe'en EVER!"
"Not quite yet." Severus opened his robes and gave her the werewolf mask. "This is for emergencies."
Nerissa held it close to her chest and nodded.
"Now off to bed with you."
Severus freshened up, put on his sleeping robes and made his way into the bedroom. He slithered under the sheets and gave his wife a kiss on the cheek.
"Where were you?!"
"Paying a call to a certain Malfoy."
She frowned. "And you didn't wait for me?"
"Perhaps your energy would be best spent on...other activities," he said with a hungry grin and captured her lips. "After all, it is Hallowe'en and I am feeling quite...wicked."
She grinned back, tugging at the neck of his sleeper. "When are you not wicked, husband dearest?"
A/N: Heh, well that's one way to spend October 31st! Thanks for reading!