SARAH
Two weeks had passed since they had left the school. The group had been shaken up, believing the herd had caught up with them so quickly. It felt even worse when they realized that this was not the same herd, but a second one.
Continua a leggere
Walkers had become increasingly numerous. It didn't matter that it had been more than a year since the virus had spread; it seemed that the number of walkers only increased. This reality was both frustrating and heartbreaking for Sarah. Deep down, she held onto the hope that one day everything would return to normal, yet she found herself confronting a dura verità: there was no way they could ever live in a world without walkers, in a world not swallowed up by death.
As she sat on the forest floor, her eyes anxiously scanned the trees surrounding her. Daryl and T-Dog had left a couple of hours earlier to scout for a place to spend the night, and Sarah felt her nerves fraying. Although she had participated in many supply runs alongside the others, watching her friend leave was becoming increasingly difficult. With every passing day on the road, her anxiety grew.
"What's with tha' face?" Daryl had asked her before he left.
"Nothing, I... nothing..." she replied, hugging her knees tightly as she observed him adding more arrows to his quiver. He turned to her, a slight frown creasing his brow.
"Ya sure?"
Sarah nodded but turned away, feeling a wave of embarrassment wash over her. It seemed so foolish...
She knew that Daryl was the best among them when it came to navigating the woods, which was why he typically took on runs like this. Yet, she felt a strange tightness in her chest. It was becoming harder for her to stay calm; her fears were multiplying. She cared deeply for everyone in their group, but it was like she was finding it increasingly difficult to cope when Daryl was out there alone.
"Hey," Maggie's voice made her look up from where she was seated against a tree. Her friend smiled at her. "They're gonna be back soon. Don't worry."
"Yeah… yeah," Sarah said, nodding her head, trying to calm herself. T-Dog and Daryl knew what they were doing. And Daryl knew all about those woods. Then why could she not stop feeling so worried?
"You know what I miss?" Maggie asked, sitting next to her, and when Sarah looked at her, she continued, "A cup of coffee."
That made Sarah let out a low chuckle before nodding her head. "I know what you mean. When I was at the university, I couldn't start my day without my Starbucks latte." She would always wake up earlier than she had to. But she really liked to go to the café and sit there as she read a book, or notes, or her homework. It was her ritual, and then she would send a message to Nicki. In San Francisco, it wasn't even dawn yet, but Sarah wanted her sister to know that even if they were in two different states, she was just a call away.
"What college did you go to?" Maggie asked.
"Yale." At Sarah's answer, Maggie's eyes widened. It happened sometimes. Sarah didn't care that much about what college she would have made it into, but her father had been so proud of her, and her mother too. They wanted the best for Sarah and Nicki, and Sarah didn't have the heart to tell them that she would have preferred not to leave California. That was why, when she learned that Nicki had made it into Atlanta's Competition, Sarah had been more than happy to go with her to support her, especially when she found out that their parents could not go.
Then suddenly they heard a cracking noise, alerting all of them that something was getting closer. They all stood up, taking their weapons in case they needed to defend themselves. After a few moments, Daryl and T-Dog appeared from behind the trees.
Sarah let out a relieved breath, observing them walking closer.
"We found a house," Daryl said to Rick. "One mile from here."
"Was it clear?" Rick asked, and T-Dog stepped forward.
"No walkers outside," he said. "No idea about the inside."
"It's worth a shot," Daryl insisted, looking at Rick. The sheriff put his hands on his hips as he thought for a moment, his eyes moving to his wife, who was sitting against a tree.
"Alright," he agreed. "Let's take everything. We can't stay here anyway."
Everybody got up at Rick's words, ready to do what he had asked them to do. Sarah went to her sleeping bag on the floor to fold it back, then she moved to untie the ropes with the cans that they usually used as an alarm. She always had to be very careful not to move the rope too much; she didn't want to attract any walkers that could be lurking nearby.
"Do ya need a hand?" Daryl's voice made her look up. He had walked over to stand next to her, his crossbow hanging on his back.
"Yes, please," she answered with a smile. "Alone it will take me forever."
He showed her a small smile that made her cheeks blush. But her eyes didn't leave his frame as he knelt down to work on the rope. She couldn't understand these reactions. Or she could. But it was not possible. It was better not to. She thought back to her conversation with Glenn about Maggie. Sarah still remembered the advice she had given him, and she really believed in those words. But now the thought of having feelings for Daryl felt too much for her. After all those months since hell broke out, she had come to know what the fear of losing people really meant. The thought of possibly losing someone she cared so deeply about terrified her. She could not catch feelings for Daryl. She would not.
"Are ya alright?" he asked suddenly, almost making her jump.
"Yes, yes," she was quick to answer, looking back at the knot on the rope. "I'm alright, why?"
He shrugged his shoulders as he slowly put down the cans so that they wouldn't make a sound. "Just wanted to make sure."
Silence fell between them, but it was a different kind of silence—one that she didn't like. It felt awkward and nervous. They had spent a lot of time together, and especially at the beginning they hadn't been close at all. Yet even back then, she remembered always feeling comfortable in his presence, like when they rode to the CDC. She didn't like feeling that awkwardness between them.
"What's your favorite singer?" she asked suddenly, making Daryl look at her with a frown before an amused scoff left his lips.
"I'm serious," she insisted, delighted by his reaction. "What is your favorite singer?"
"Why do ya wanna know?" he asked, but the smile never left his lips.
Sarah shrugged her shoulders. "I could have asked you what your favorite color is, but I already know that."
That made him turn his body toward her as they knelt on the ground. "I never told ya."
She smiled shyly. "I think I've figured it out," she answered, trying to hide the blush on her cheeks, suddenly feeling embarrassed. Maybe she should have just kept quiet.
"And what's that?" His voice came out soft, in a hushed, soothing whisper.
"I think it's green," she answered as she gathered the cans to put them inside a bag.
"Why?" The question took her by surprise, but she answered all the same.
"You look so at ease in the woods," she said, keeping her gaze on the ground. "I know you know the woods perfectly, and that's probably why, but I've noticed how you look at the leaves when you're resting. You seem calm, relaxed, comfortable." Her eyes had lingered on him many times when he was not on runs or hunting. He seemed submerged in his element every time he looked at the trees when he didn't have to worry about what he had to do next. He sat silently, looking at the trees. She loved to see him like that.
She blushed when she noticed him staring. "I don't know," she said, shaking her head with shyness. "That's what I thought."
"It is," she heard him whisper from next to her. His words made her eyes widen as she turned to him. "Green's my favorite color," Daryl spoke again. His blue eyes were looking at her with so much softness that it made her heart beat fast. But this time, she didn't look away; she let her lips lift into a soft smile.
They drove for ten minutes. Sarah was on the bike behind Daryl, her arms around his middle as he rode. She still felt the smile on her face that hadn't left since their earlier conversation. It was dangerous to have feelings in that world, but she could not deny that feeling him close to her, whether through a simple conversation or while riding together, had become one of the things that brought her comfort and joy.
When they arrived at the house, they all already knew what they had to do. "Be careful," Sarah whispered to Daryl, touching his shoulder. He turned just enough to see her face and nodded silently. Sarah then leaned back on the bike a little so Daryl could dismount easier, and she quickly did the same, running to Glenn's car to help with the bags. As she made her way there, Nicki headed toward the house. She was supposed to clear it with Daryl, Rick, T-Dog, and Carl. Sarah squeezed her sister's arm as she walked by, knowing that Nicki hated encouraging words, especially if they felt like goodbyes.
Luckily, it didn't take them long to clear the house; there were just three walkers inside, but it seemed it had already been scavenged. The furniture had been opened, and everything looked worn out. Sarah shared a look with Glenn as they sat in what had once been the living room; there was probably nothing useful or edible, but at least they had a roof and four walls. It was better than nothing.
"I've got some food," Daryl said as he walked in with a dead owl.
"I hope it tastes like chicken," Sarah replied, trying to lighten the mood as Daryl set it down next to her.
"Let's find out," he said with a tired smile as he started to pluck the owl's feathers. Sarah looked around and observed everyone's faces; they were so tired, so worn out. They all turned when they heard footsteps getting closer, just before Carl and Nicki appeared. Nicki sat down on a chair, her right leg up so she could rest her arm on it, while Carl knelt down in front of her, holding some cans in his hands. For a moment, Sarah felt almost overjoyed to see canned food. What had become of their lives? Now they celebrated when they found some beans. But her hope faded as she noticed that he had found dog food. They had been eating all sorts of things, and now they were nearing another big achievement.
As Carl opened the can, Sarah saw Rick walking toward his son, then bend down to take it in his hand. He examined it, almost with disgust. Sarah understood that feeling; the thought of eating dog food was sad, and it was disheartening that at this point, she only cared about eating something edible. How had they come to this?
Suddenly, Rick threw the can on the ground, and Sarah noticed Daryl flinch beside her.
"Are you okay?" she asked softly, getting closer to him. Daryl blinked, glancing from Rick to the can on the ground. "Daryl?" she asked again, this time getting his attention as she touched his arm.
"It's alright," he answered in a whisper. Their eyes met, and even though she could see some uneasiness in his gaze, she decided not to push it.
"I would have eaten it," Nicki's voice made them all turn toward her. She was sitting in a chair, behind Carl, who was observing her with wide eyes. Nicolette's gaze remained on Rick, who seemed unwilling for her to argue, but Sarah knew better. Her sister was collected, but she was extremely stubborn, and if she wanted to say something, she would.
"It's either that or the owl, anyway," Nicki said, leaning back in the chair with a shrug.
Rick was about to respond, but T-Dog whistled to signal that walkers were close. Sarah almost huffed in annoyance at seeing those creatures once again. She just wanted them gone, for just one day. Carol was quick to pass Sarah her bag, and then they all rushed outside.
"Drive a mile east," Rick said as Nicki and Carl got into the car behind him. "We need to decide what to do next."
"Alright," Glenn replied as the Greenes closed the doors of their car. Sarah quickly sat on the bike, waiting for Daryl to do the same before holding onto him again. Meanwhile, T-Dog had started to drive the car with Carol.
Sarah turned her head to look at the first walkers appearing as Daryl took them away from there. "I'm tired of all of this, Daryl," she said, feeling the sadness of being on the road once again.
"We'll find a place," he answered as he drove. She knew it was highly unlikely, and he probably didn't believe his own words, but somehow, she felt comforted. So, she hugged his middle closer and let her head rest on his shoulder. She remembered when he used to flinch whenever she tried to touch him, but now it had become so natural, especially thanks to their trips on his bike.
"It feels like a promise," she said.
They traveled a mile east, though Sarah wouldn't know that was where Rick wanted them to stop. They needed to figure out their next move, just like they had done hundreds of times before.
"Fifteen, you're on point," Rick said to Carl before walking toward the car where Sarah, Daryl, Maggie, Glenn, Hershel, and T-Dog were waiting. The others were on guard, ensuring no walkers were getting closer. Sarah glanced at her sister; Nicki was looking at the woods, her arrow already nocked, ready to pull the string if necessary.
"We've got no place left to go," T-Dog said, frustration evident in his voice.
Maggie pointed at the map. "When this herd meets up with this one, we'll be cut off." Sarah took a breath as Maggie continued, "We'll never make it south."
"What do you say?" Daryl asked Glenn. "It's about 150 head?"
"That was last week," Glenn replied. "It could be twice that now."
"Most likely," Sarah muttered, crossing her arms as she looked at the map. It felt like their time was running out, just a matter of time before one or both herds caught up with them.
"This river could have delayed them," Hershel said, drawing everyone's attention. "If we move fast, we might have a shot to cut right through this."
"Yeah," T-Dog chimed in, "but if this group joins that one, they could spill out this way."
He wasn't wrong. "So we're blocked," Maggie reflected aloud.
Rick stepped forward, pointing at the map. "Only thing to do is double back at 27th and swing toward Greenville."
Sarah looked up at the men from where she stood between Daryl and T-Dog. "Rick, we've been there already," she said, more tired than angry, remembering the name of the place. "There's nothing."
T-Dog nodded. "It's like we spent the winter going in circles." Sarah felt a pang for Rick, seeing his face as T-Dog spoke those words. She was incredibly grateful to Rick; he had made many difficult decisions and protected them during their time on the road. After what had happened with Shane, he had taken on the burden of the group. But she understood T-Dog's frustration too.
They hadn't been able to find a place in nine months. The first month had been tough; now it was unbearable. That kind of stress could fracture the group, and they needed to stay united.
"Yeah, I know. I know," Rick replied, nodding. "At Newnan, we'll push west. Haven't been through that area. We can't keep going house to house." Sarah followed his gaze to the car where Lori waited for their decision. "We need to find somewhere to hold up for a few weeks."
The time was fast approaching for her to have the baby. How could she do it in the middle of the woods with two herds on their tail? Sarah knew that Lori and Rick had had some kind of fallout after the farm, but she couldn't imagine what Rick must be feeling in that moment. He had to protect not just the group but his entire family, with a baby on the way. The pressure on him must be immense.
"Alright," T-Dog said, voicing what they were all thinking. There was no point in standing around; they had to move, and Rick had found a solution, so Sarah was fine with that. As long as they left those herds behind.
"We're out of water, though," she said to Rick. "We'll need it for the journey."
"Sarah's right," T-Dog added, nodding. He turned to Rick. "Can we get to the creek before we head out? It won't take long." He looked back at Sarah. "We can boil it later."
Sarah smiled at him, then turned to Rick. "I'm cool with that if you are."
Rick nodded. "Knock yourself out."
"Alright," T-Dog said, lightly nudging Sarah. "Let's go."
Before she could move, she felt a feather-light touch on her arm. She turned to see Daryl, his features thoughtful as he lightly bit the side of his bottom lip, a habit she had learned meant he was deciding whether to say something. Sarah had often wondered why he did that around her, but she had seen him do it with others too, a sign of his shyness. Strangely, that shyness had helped her build the fondness she now felt for him.
"Be careful out there," he said, his voice a quiet whisper.
Sarah smiled, her heart racing. "Sure," she replied. "See you later." Daryl only nodded as she walked away with T-Dog. Before heading toward the woods, Sarah stopped next to Nicki, who looked at her with curiosity.
"We're going to get some water," she explained. "T's talking about a creek. You'll stick with Carl, right?"
Nicki glanced briefly at the boy, still on guard, then back at Sarah. "I'm stuck with Shorty."
"So you both are stuck with adults," Sarah said, taking a breath.
"Yeah, I know, I know," Nicki replied. "We won't wander around alone."
"Good girl," Sarah said with a smile. "See you later."
She trusted Nicolette. During their last night at the farm, Sarah had nearly had a heart attack when she found out her sister had recklessly exited the house with Carl. But over the months, she had learned that it was good for the kids to be aware of their surroundings. Both Nicki and Carl had become dependable members of the group, finding food, wood, clearing houses of walkers, and taking watch. But Sarah didn't want them wandering around with two herds coming their way. For now, it was better they were protected by adults.
"I miss football," T-Dog said, and Sarah chuckled as she filled an empty bottle with cool creek water. It felt refreshing now that the season had changed, but she still remembered the shivers from collecting water during the winter. She had thought her fingers would freeze off.
"I remember Jacqui saying you used to play," Sarah said, a hint of sadness creeping in as she thought about the woman. Jacqui had been so sweet and caring, always offering a kind word. It pained Sarah to think that she was no longer with them. She didn't judge Jacqui for her decision; she only hoped she had found peace.
"Oh yes, sweetie," T-Dog replied with a laugh, clearly reminiscing. "That's how the name T-Dog was born."
"I would have loved to watch you play," Sarah said, taking another bottle.
"You liked football?" he asked, intrigued.
"Not that much, actually," she admitted. "But I liked watching my boyfriend play."
That made T-Dog chuckle again. "I didn't take you for the type to date the popular guy in school."
"Oh, me neither, believe me," Sarah replied, shaking her head. "It was really unexpected."
She found herself thinking about Peter sometimes. She hoped he was still alive and safe, as safe as anyone could be. She cherished those afternoons at his house, sometimes alone with him and sometimes with his parents, who had always been kind to her. It was hard to know that everyone she cared about was so far away, and she probably would never know what had happened to them.
At first, she and Nicki had considered hitting the road to try to return to San Francisco. It had seemed possible at the time, but now Sarah couldn't imagine her life away from her group. They had become as close as family, and attempting a journey back to California was out of the question. It was too dangerous. She didn't want to put Nicolette in that kind of risk, and she didn't want to lose all the people she cared about. Not again. The thought made her shiver with fear, a fear greater than facing walkers. She had already lost one family; she didn't want to lose another.
The two of them had barely made it back when Daryl and Rick emerged from the woods, their eyes wide with hope. Sarah hadn't seen those kinds of looks for a while.
"What is it?" Hershel asked, looking at them.
Rick took a breath, as if he had run to get back. "We found a place."