In Veritas Memento

Rating: NC 17

Disclaimer: I own nothing. All aspects of Spartacus: Gods of the Arena are owned by Steven De Knight and Starz. This is for pure entertainment value alone.

This story takes place after the episode Missio, yet it veers completely into an A/U after the events of that episode. I am a huge fan of the series Spartacus; however, my favorite character is Gannicus. This is his story.

Warnings: M for a reason. This story is much like the show. It contains bad words and smut! If that is not your cup of tea, turn back now. Although, if cussing and nude scenes offend, are you sure you're a fan of Spartacus?! ;) Hehehe. Kidding. Anyhow, you've been warned.

Pairings: There are multiple pairings, and Gannicus has more than one partner in this story, however, Gannicus/Melitta is endgame. If reading Gannicus with multiple pairings offends you, again, turn back now.

Chapter 38: incertae sedis: Of uncertain position

Rome:

The massive six storied Trajan Market place was located on the busy Via dei Fori Imperiali, the main thoroughfare that ran directly through the very heart of Rome. It was a hive of bustling activity due to the overwhelming amount of goods sold within. Roman nobles and their slaves, as well as plebeians and freedmen all frequented the huge open market forums to either buy or hawk their wares; and everything from imported silks and spices to slaves could be found at the Trajan Market.

On a trip to purchase goods for the arrival of their guests from Capua, Octavia looped her arm through the arm of the tall, handsome blonde man at her side as they strolled along the open corridor of the busy Market. They were followed closely by an armed escort, several slaves bearing the Roman's sellas (litters) as well as a multitude of packages containing purchases already made.

"Claudius, we must visit the Via Sacra before we leave," Octavia told her husband, smiling up at him. "I ordered an eggshell marble from Tuscany three weeks past and it has yet to be delivered. It must be at Ettinius' gallery before Gannicus' arrival. You know I desire to see him carved in stone during his stay with us." She pouted in a manner her husband found irresistible. "I will be most unhappy if my plans go awry due to merchant error."

He returned her smile indulgently. Claudius Metellus Aurelius was a powerful man who adored his wife and would offer her the world if she but asked; considering he was the second richest man in Rome, (only Crassus himself was wealthier) with a worth of over two hundred million denarii, her wishes were never left unattended. "I am well-aware of your tendencies to have your own way in all things, sweet wife," he said with a teasing grin. "And do I not see to it that your desires are met?"

"You do," she admitted, her gaze as adoring as his. She gave his arm a soft squeeze. "Then you will come to the shop with me and request the stone be ready by next week? Even in the face of additional coin?"

He leaned down to kiss her upturned nose. "How could I not? Your desires are my own." He paused and tilted her chin up, so he could stare down into Octavia's bright green eyes. "I have never seen you happier than you have been since your return from Capua. It warms heart to see you smile with such giddy excitement. If having a stone portrait of this gladiator is of such importance to you, it will be done."

"Gratitude," she told him. "You spoil me, and it is much appreciated."

"I would lay Olympus itself at your feet," he told her sincerely, as his thumb stroked her cheek. "I must admit, I am rabid with curiosity to lay gaze upon this God of the Arena. He must truly be the beautiful beast the poets describe to have captured your heart so thoroughly."

Octavia leaned up and pressed a gentle kiss to her husband's soft lips. She loved him with all her heart—as her best friend. "You are the most amazing man. The Gods truly bless me." Her eyes teared up. "I love you, Claudius. You know that, do you not? Nothing, not even my love for Gannicus, will ever take from what I feel for you."

They had been married for many years, Claudius was certain of his wife's love and loyalty.

He wiped her tears away. "Do not cry, Tavia. I have the entirety of your heart, which is all I desire," he said, "it is only your body I find repulsive." He chuckled, making easy jest between them regarding where his preferences in the bedroom lay; they had no secrets, Octavia was aware he desired handsome men in his bed.

"Repulsive indeed," she snorted. "Yet, you have managed, on occasion, to put your cock in it."

He leaned down to her ear. "But not in cunt," he whispered, kissing her cheek as he added, "in fact, the cock you strap around hips when we fuck, has been inside me, more than mine has been inside you." Claudius chuckled like a naughty boy when she gasped his name chidingly and flushed red at his mention of their bedroom practices in public. "Do not fret, there are no prying ears nearby," he assured with a teasing smile.

This was why he needed her. He was too open at times. "Still," she told him seriously, "you must show caution when speaking of such things. You cannot have members of your peers discovering you prefer to be entered, you know this," she said worriedly.

He shrugged. "Which, is why we are the perfect pair, are we not? We each have our secrets desires and through our marriage we indulge them."

Her smile was beautiful as she pictured Gannicus, and finally having him available to her at any hour she chose. "True. Gratitude again for allowing Batiatus and his party to reside at our domus."

"Tavia," he told her, his blue eyes sparkling with adoration. "You are my dearest friend and confidante. Without you, I would have put dagger to breast years ago to escape fucking father's condemning shadow! I would see you happy."

"We helped each other. Our marriage saved us both. Never forget that, my love. I am equally in your debt as you are in mine."

They started to walk again, arm in arm, leaning on each other (much as they did in life) as they moved towards the stairs leading to the level where the marble forums resided. The slaves brought their sellas forward, so they did not have to exert themselves up the stairs, but Claudius waved them off. "We will walk," he said. As they climbed the stairs to the next level of the market, he was reminded of another task she had set him on recently. "Speaking of achieving your desires," he said, "I had conversation with Bacchus relating to Tullius and his trade commissions…"

A villa on the outskirts of Capua:

Vettius followed the house slave through the two storied, open aired atrium and into Tullius' tablinum, where the merchant was waiting for him. Tullius was seated behind a large wooden desk, signing a stack of ledgers and receipts when Vettius entered.

"Sit," he said, without looking up. Vettius took a seat and waited as Tullius finished signing his name to the books and handed them off to his solicitor, standing next to the merchant. "Have these delivered to proper hand today," he instructed.

The man nodded and exited the room.

Tullius picked up a parchment from the voluminous stack on his desk and waved it at Vettius. "Do you know what this is?"

Vettius shook his head. "I cannot say that I do."

"It was rhetorical question, you shit!" Tullius barked.

Vettius was taken aback at the anger in Tullius' voice. "You're in a mood," he said.

Tullius' jaw clenched. "This is a missive I received from Lettivius Bacchus, the man I share commerce with in Rome. He has warned me that my access to trade upon the silk road may wither and die like an old whore tossed upon the streets."

Vettius' eyes widened. "What shit eater would dare such a thing?"

"He would not say, which tells me the hand behind the scheme frightens him more than I do." Tullius tossed the document aside. "Fucking Octavia is behind this. I am absent proof, but my instincts have served me well, and they are telling me this…" He motioned to the missive, "is by her design. Although, the hand that strikes fear is Claudius'."

"Why would she set herself to ruining you?"

Tullius stared hard at his young apprentice. Was the boy truly so dense? "Think Vettius," he said, striving for patience. "To what purpose would Octavia become involved?"

The boy's eyes lit up. "Gannicus!"

"Yes, Gannicus!" Tullius snapped. "The woman is consumed with his cock. She seeks to protect him."

"From whom?" Vettius asked.

Tullius rolled his eyes, asking the Gods for patience. "From me you cunt!"

Taken aback at Tullius' reply, Vettius was hesitant in his next question. "To what purpose would Claudius lend hand to protect his wife's lover? A fucking slave, at that."

"Claudius indulges Octavia to the point of overindulgence," Tullius replied, scorn dripping from every word. "He's aware of her lovers yet turns blind eye. His protection is why she retains her status despite her affairs being common knowledge amongst her peers. To speak ill of her would bring down the wrath of the Roman Consul."

"And you mentioned her predilections to Titus," Vettius said on a sigh.

"I did," Tullius admitted, his fury at overplaying his hand obvious. "A misstep, which has apparently reached Octavia's ears." He paused, before adding, "Her invitation to the Apolloinares settles in mind with new reasoning."

"It does," Vettius agreed. "She plans to ruin you in Rome."

Tullius nodded. Hearing Vettius agree only set to make him angrier. "That fuck! That fucking shit fuck Batiatus!" he snarled, coming to his feet behind his desk. "Blame for this entire debacle can be laid at his fucking feet! If he had just sold me Gannicus," Tullius snarled, "I would not be at cross points with the woman. Instead, I would be awash in a wave of her coin and favor as she sought permission to ride the cock of my vaunted champion." He sighed, his vision one of tremendous pleasure. "That is how it should have been had Batiatus not fucked it up to Tartarus and back!"

"But Titus is still considering bid to purchase. Perhaps after the Apollinares—"

Tullius slammed his palms down flat upon his desk, causing Vettius to jump. "Will be too late, you ignorant whelp!" The merchant shouted, leaning across the desk to level angry gaze upon his apprentice. "Have you not heard a fucking word I have said?" He could not believe Vettius was not understanding predicament. "The woman is planning to ruin my trade venues when I arrive in Rome. Waiting to purchase Gannicus until after the Apolloinares is a fool's errand. It would cost me everything I own to see trade contracts restored. Octavia knows this and would see me returned to Capua, my reputation in tatters, without necessary coin to complete sale."

Vettius had no words of denial and Tullius exhaled loudly as he realized he had been bested. "With Octavia supporting Batiatus, Gannicus is lost to me," the merchant finally said.

"Then what are we to do? We have Caburus. He is—"

"I do not give one fuck about the ludus, Vettius!" Tullius shouted, sweeping his hand through the stacks of parchments and ledgers upon his desk, sending them to the floor in a tangled crash. "Attaining Gannicus symbolized more than just enhancing my fucking stable. It was matter of pride!" Tullius began to pace back and forth beside his desk. "If I cannot have him, no one shall fucking have him!" he snarled, a plan forming. "I will snatch him from Batiatus' grasp and watch with as Octavia, mourning the loss of Gannicus' golden cock, withdraws cherished favor from his lanista."

Vettius started to laugh. "Without the Celt," he pointed out, "the man would be left with nothing more than his normal piss and shit gladiators to satisfy her desires."

"A taste unworthy of Severus' noble palate," Tullius replied with an evil smirk. "Remove her desired gladiator from equation and Octavia will absent herself as well, lessening Claudius' desire to see me ruined."

"And Batiatus?" Vettius questioned with an insidious smile. "What plan do you have for him?"

Tullius' laughter was treacherous. "Batiatus will, once again, be nothing more than a shit fuck lanista who overreached position and found himself ground beneath fucking heel at my whim."

Vettius nodded, admiring of the plan. "How do you propose we remove Batiatus' champion from the very hands that seek to protect him? Despite being a shit hole, the man's ludus is secure and Gannicus has no matches scheduled before Rome."

Tullius gave a calculated smile. "Sextus' games are at the end of this week. Would it not be beneficial to have the Champion of Capua in attendance for exhibition?"

Vettius grinned. "I believe it would."

"Then let us speak with the Magistrate and whisper in his ear the many ways having Gannicus at his games will benefit."

*8*

"And?" Octavia asked, arching a brow. "What was the man's reaction? Will he hold Tullius' orders if requested?"

"Of course, he will. There is nothing in Rome that cannot be had with the proper coin," Claudius replied with a wink. "However, do not be surprised if the man warns Tullius of a threat to his trade. They have had business together for years, Tavia, Bacchus will see his own needs met first, and would desire to keep Tullius as loyal friend."

When she frowned, he sought to relieve her worry. "It is not cause for concern. I expected Bacchus to warn the man." He shrugged nonchalantly. "Cautionary words will not change outcome. If you desire Tullius to lose position along the Silk trade, I will see it come to pass. Trust words, love. I will remove the Capuan thorn from side long before I would allow the man to cause smile to dim."

They had reached the third level of the Market, where the forums for marble, imported stone tiles, mosaics, dyes, woods and other items of such were housed on one end of the floor. On the other end of the third story, were the forums that dealt in imported precious stones and metals, gems and the jewelry market. "I will go to Via Sacra and secure your specialty marble, while you will go to Et Uxor and discover the surprise I have arranged."

Her eyes widened, but her smile was well pleased. "And what surprise do you have waiting for me at the diamond forum?"

He placed a hand over his heart. "One that is rivaled only by your beauty."

"You bless me," she said.

"For one smile from you, I would face Jupiter himself," he told her sincerely. "Now go." His excitement at presenting his gift palpable.

"Come with me," she said. "Would you not appreciate seeing my joy?"

He shook his head. "You know I cannot stomach the anxiety. What if you do not favor my gift?"

She rolled her eyes. "That has never happened." Claudius had the most magnificent taste in jewelry.

"And it never will. At least, not that I will bear witness to," he told her. "Please let me enjoy spoiling you in my own fashion."

She sighed. "Very well, but only because it pleases you to remain absent."

He grinned. "Gratitude, now go and see what I have for you, and upon return, you may tell me how no woman has ever had such a husband!"

Octavia felt an answering excitement stir. "One needs only set gaze upon my jewelry presently and realize such a thing."

"All will fade before the glory of newest gift, wife," he promised. "Cecilia especially will turn green with envy when she sets gaze upon it."

"Why did you not begin discussion with that?" Octavia said with another roll of her eyes.

Her young cousin Cecilia was in constant competition with her, and it annoyed Octavia to no end how the girl wanted to possess anything and everything she had. If Cecilia could have Claudius, Octavia had no doubts the little viper would snatch husband from breast with no remorse. The girl had arrived last week absent Octavia's brother, who was the girl's guardian. Yet, Octavia had received missive a few days ago saying he would be in town for the games and planned to stay with them.

"If it will displease her, you know I will adore it. Perhaps it shall even make Lucius' presence more tolerable," she added with a frown.

Claudius made a face at the mention of Octavia's older brother. Lucius Severus was a brutal man who had spent much of his life in the Roman military fighting one legendary Battle after another. Although both men were born of the Patrician class, Claudius had little to nothing in common with the man who could kill another human being with no more remorse than if he was swatting a fly. The older man's ruthless nature chilled Claudius to the bone, but he hesitated to show Octavia his fears.

Claudius smiled down at her. "He appreciates my coin too much to cause trouble, Tavia," he said.

Octavia did not argue, despite knowledge that Claudius did not truly understand how evil her brother could be. "The man is my Paterfamilias, I must do as he commands."

He took her hands in his. "We will get through this visit as we have every other one, love. I promise you, I will not let him hurt you."

Octavia sighed, and she forcefully banished the tears that wanted to fall at his sweet promise. He made the same vow every time Lucius arrived at their domus and, it never failed, each visit her brother had with them he tormented her. Despite Claudius' extreme wealth, his kind nature was no match for her brother's darkness. Octavia knew this, but Claudius needed to believe he could protect her, so she let him think he had all these years. It was one thing she could do for him because she adored him, and he did so much for her.

"I worry for Gannicus," she admitted. "If Lucius realizes I care for him, he will try and hurt him, and Gannicus is but a slave."

Claudius' entire being reared back at the mention of slavery. It was a topic he felt passionate about. "No slave shall ever be abused under my roof, Octavia!" he said forcefully. "You know I abhor the entire practice as it is. I will not allow a human being to be harmed when under my protection. Your brother and I would have fucking words of ugly purpose if he attempted such a thing."

"Ssshhh," she quieted him. Her eyes darted around the crowded market, terrified he had been overheard. "You cannot have people hear you speak in such a manner."

Claudius' hatred of slavery was a well-guarded secret between them, but he was becoming more outspoken and it worried Octavia. A newly elected Senator, Teronius, had recently spoken out against slavery; he was daggered to death on the steps of the Senate the day following his speech. The incident alarmed her because it could have been Claudius. He and Teronius shared a common goal—see the slaves freed in the Republic. It was a dangerous idea, one that could see her husband dead, especially if her brother heard of it.

"Human beings should not own each other. You know how I feel on the issue."

"I do. However, the practice will not end in your time, my love," she told him gently. "You do what you can to right the wrong you feel. You have freed many slaves since your father died. To do more will see you murdered like Good Teronius. I beg of you, for me, do not speak openly of your beliefs and endanger your very life, especially in front of Lucius." Her eyes filled with tears and her lips trembled. "Please, Claudius. Promise me."

Claudius nodded immediately. He would do or give anything to remove tears from her green eyes. "I promise." Moreover, she was right. He had no desire to become a martyr for the cause, he would rather help to solve it a small step at a time. "Apologies, my love. I would never leave you to stand as widow dressed in black robes." He smiled. "You are far too ravishing. Purple is much better suited for one as lovely as you."

She gave him a quick kiss. "Gratitude," she said, placing a hand on his cheek. "I would wither and die if I lost you. I could not go on."

"Octavia…"

She shook her head. "No, I will not hear another word of it," she said, her mood changing so fast, Claudius had to readjust as she went from grief to determination in less than a second. "Let us turn to more pleasant topics such as my gift."

Pleased she was smiling again, he grinned too. "And your marble," he added, taking her hand from his face and kissing the palm. "We cannot forget the marble needed to carve your beautiful gladiator into magnificent work of art."

"Yes!" she said, clapping her hands when he released her. "I am in favor of this idea," she told him with a smile she knew he adored. "Gannicus will be magnificent in stone! Get me my marble, dear husband, and then you will truly have the happiest of wives." With that last demand she turned and, with her slaves and escort trailing behind her, made her way down the long, open corridor towards the other end of the third floor where Et Uxor resided, excited to see her newest bauble from the mines of Africa.

*8*

Gannicus was sitting on his bed as he finished off his third cup of wine. He was supposed to visit with Oenomaus, as they had so many other times in the past, yet the blonde gladiator found himself anxious for the night to come; hence the wine to soothe nerves. The two men had barely spoken in so long, Gannicus could not help but wonder if this impromptu visit was a huge mistake. What if they found no common ground on which to break words? That could make for an awkward evening.

Gannicus was so absorbed in his thoughts, he did not hear Oenomaus as the man came to his open cell.

"I thought your accomodations would be more comfortable, considering all your new luxuries."

Gannicus' head snapped up, surprised to find the big man standing at his door, apparently calling on him rather than vice versa.

Despite being nervous, a welcoming grin stretched across his face. "Oenomaus," he called, waving the man inside. "Come." He poured another cup of wine. "Tip drink and let us catch up. It has been too long, brother."

Oenomaus entered Gannicus' quarters, his eyes taking in the blonde gladiator's new finery. He picked up one of the chairs set at the gladiator's table and carried it over to where Gannicus sat on the bed. "Gratitude," he said, setting the chair down with one hand and accepting the wine with the other. "Your quarters have markedly improved since last I visited."

Gannicus was not sure if Oenomaus was simply making observation or if he was subtly pointing out how long it had been since they had broken words. He decided it did not matter. He missed Oenomaus and was anxious to find some sort of peace with the man. "Octavia does like to spoil me," he admitted, grinning as he held up the wine decanter. "I'm especially fond of the endless supply of drink I now have."

The bigger man rolled his eyes, but a smile appeared on his noble face just the same. "Of course, you are," he replied taking a sip of the wine. His eyes widened at the flavor. "And I can see why. This is far better than anything we have had before."

Gannicus nodded. "It's Falernian."

"I am assuming that means it is good?" Oenomaus teased. He was not much of a drinker and had certainly never had previous opportunity to partake in such expensive drink.

"As good as any Batiatus drinks in yonder villa," he said with a wink.

"Such things blur lines between master and slave."

Gannicus snorted. "Yet tasks demanded absent choice would see them carved in stone."

"True," Oenomaus said with a sigh. They were quiet for a moment before the Doctore mentioned Kleos. "I am pleased to see you taking interest in your boy, brother. He is of an age now that your presence will make difference."

"If I had known of his existence earlier, I would have made presence known then."

A frown pulled at the Doctore's face. "Explain meaning."

And Gannicus did, telling Oenomaus everything relating to his discovery of Kleos' existence and why he had thought the boy passed of this life.

After Gannicus had finished with his story, Oenomaus was quiet for several moments, digesting what he had learned. "That is news to sadden the heart," the Doctore finally said, leaning back in his chair, legs outstretched before him. He shook his head and sighed. "Your reaction to Melitta's questions of years past bears new meaning in light of this discovery."

Gannicus nodded. "If only I had allowed words to break from her lips…" He glanced at Oenomaus. "You would not have been forced to nearly break stubborn head open and I would have been made aware the boy yet lived." He downed the rest of his wine. "I am a fool."

"Acquit yourself," the Doctore refuted. "Seraphina did a terrible thing delivering such venomous lies to your ear. One day, she will have to answer for that when she faces the Gods on her journey to the afterlife." He glanced to his glass, saw it was empty and set it aside. Gannicus refilled it and handed it back to him. "Gratitude," Oenomaus said and took a sip, his voice weary as he added, "It weighs heavy on mind that you suffered such a thing alone."

Gannicus shrugged. "See it eased, brother. There is naught you can do about it presently." He paused before saying, "In truth, Oenomaus, I am uncertain I should even tell the boy I stand as father."

That had Oenomaus sitting upright. "Break open head and share reasoning for considering this option."

Gannicus chuckled. "My words cannot come as surprise. You have known me for many years. In all that time have you ever set gaze upon me and thought I would set good example for a child?"

Oenomaus could not argue with his logic there, however… "That does not mean you cannot inspire the boy, Gannicus."

"In what manner? How to fight and fuck your way through life?"

Oenomaus sighed. "You have always viewed yourself in harsher light than those who love you." He leaned forward, leveling his gaze on the younger man. "Do not rush decision based on fears of failure. Perhaps you should continue to have words with the boy before choosing path."

"And if I decide to do so later, I can tell the boy I stand as father."

Oenomaus nodded. "At worst, you have given him the attentions of the House Champion, a position to be admired by all within this ludus." The Doctore smiled kindly. "If you break truth at some time, you have begun to forge bond between father and son, a thing to be cherished, brother."

Gannicus saluted Oenomaus with his glass, appreciating the man's pragmatic viewpoint. "Gratitude, brother," he said softly. "You give me much to think upon. As always, your words of wisdom are well received."

*8*

Melitta stood in the doorway of her husband's cell watching as he stumbled onto his bed. "I see you have partaken in drink tonight," she said curiously. Oenomaus rarely drank, especially of late since he and Gannicus no longer shared wine.

The big man turned, and a broad smile broke out upon his face. "Apologies wife. I made visit with Gannicus and my brother has much wine now." He chuckled huskily. "He refiled glass more times than was necessary."

Melitta's heart seized. "You were with Gannicus tonight?"

Oenomaus nodded happily. "We had words over his discovery of Kleos," he said. "I believe that is what has bothered him of late, even if he did not say it was so."

Seeing him so happy made Melitta happy too. "But you were well pleased with your visit I take it?"

He nodded. "We shared wine and laughter. It was a good night." He collapsed on his bed and waved her in. "I am surprised to see you. It is not our night."

Melitta entered his quarters and curled up beside him on his cot. "With the upcoming trip to Rome and the house slaves on bed rest…" She sighed. "I will be busy all week. I wanted to take a moment and visit with my husband."

He grinned. "It is most appreciated," he said and reached for her to embrace.

Unconsciously, Melitta stiffened and Oenomaus reared back to see why she resisted his touch. "I feel you withdraw, as if you can no longer bear my hands upon you." He shook his head, as if trying to clear it. "I have waited, hoping you would break words on what troubles you, yet you no longer seek my counsel, and I do not understand why," he said, his mood shifting from elated to worried.

Her stomach twisted at the sudden pain on his face, and she was sickened at being the cause, but she had no words of comfort to offer. How could she tell him she had lost heart to his most cherished brother? To do so would only see pain become devastation.

"This house…" she said softly, "the secrets within these walls, they have changed me."

He frowned. "Changed you? In what manner?"

"I cannot have these words with you. You truly love this house…I do not." She sighed, and a tear slipped from her eye to trail down her cheek.

"You have made mention of this before, yet you refuse to let me help you. I feel a chasm between us growing and I am absent tools to mend the gap."

It was too much. She bit back a sob, utterly torn. She had to escape. "I am sorry," she whispered. "I must return to the villa."

She went to rise, but he gently took hold her arm, halting her retreat. "Pause a moment."

"I cannot. I am needed to ensure each daily tasks are completed before night's end." It was a flimsy excuse, she knew it, and from his expression, he did as well. She leaned down and placed a tender kiss on his lips. "I simply wanted to see you and tell you I love you." As she said it, she knew it to be truth. She did love her husband, yet she also loved another; her warring desires were tearing her apart.

He reluctantly released her, but not before brushing her hair back from her face and studying her eyes for a moment. The sorrow within the lustrous brown depths was heartbreaking. "I will cease my questioning…for now," he said. "But you must find path to unburden yourself. I will keep your confidence. In this you have my word."

Melitta got to her feet. She turned her back to him and spoke without thinking. "And what if the truth I unburden is not to your liking? What will you do then?"

His face showed his stunned surprise and, as soon as the words left mouth, Melitta wished she could take them back. "Apologies…" she started, but he was already in motion, rising from his bed; her words died in her throat.

Oenomaus took hold of her shoulders. "If I am cause for your sadness, I would have honest words between us, Melitta." His deep, intuitive gaze searched her face, seeking answers. "Is it true? Does the root of your heartache lie at my feet?"

It would be so easy to say yes and be done with it, but Melitta could not lay blame with him. It would be a lie. Her struggle was her inability to harmonize what she "morally" believed was right and what her heart coveted. "Fault does not lie with you, Oenomaus, it is my burden to bear," she told him, stroking his jaw. "You are the most honorable man I know. Allow me to sort through troubled thoughts. I will find solution without burdening you as well."

He gave a nod of his head despite his desire to demand she explain herself.

"I must go," she said, and with one last kiss, Melitta turned and fled his presence before she broke words she could not take back.

Oenomaus watched her go. The previous joy of fond reunion with brother gone in the wake of his wife's unhappiness. He had never seen Melitta in such a state, and for a moment, his mind searched for reasons behind such feelings. It was then a sickening thought went through the Doctore's head as the time frame of between both his brother's withdrawal and his wife sudden dissatisfaction correlated to approximately the same time.

Did one have to do with the other?

The thought caused his breath to stop momentarily before he shook it off. No. It was too terrible, and he tried to banish the idea, but the more he tried to see it from brain, the deeper the worry became. Oenomaus lay back on his bed. It had to be the wine he drank causing such thoughts. They saw each other as brother and sister, not lovers and by the time his eyes started to droop, he had nearly convinced himself it was the wine making him suspicious. However, as he drifted into Morpheus' realm, images of Melitta and Gannicus haunted him, raising his concerns once again.

*8*

After Oenomaus had left to retire to his own cell for the night, Gannicus was still awake. The visit had gone well and, in less time than he imagined, they were laughing together like times of past. The night made Gannicus contemplate the unthinkable…letting Melita go, at least while they were still within the walls of this ludus. Perhaps, if he were to someday purchase her freedom they might have a life together, one that did not include humiliating a man they both loved and admired.

Feeling restless, Gannicus was in the training yard practicing with his bow and arrow. He had just hit the "heart" on his target dummy for the tenth time in a row when he heard a soft whisper of his name being called from across the sands. He turned and through the gates of a side entrance to the ludus, he saw Melitta standing there. His eyes widened in surprise. At first, he wondered if he was seeing things, but when she softly called his name again, he realized she was indeed real and waiting for him. He set aside his bow and went to her, unable to resist the call of her presence.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, looking around to see if there was guard present to spot them. When none made their presence, he realized the man must be walking the corridors inside the barracks.

She should not be here, yet she could not stop herself. "I was leaving Oenomaus and saw you…"

Gannicus sighed. Thinking of her with Oenomaus inspired a deep jealousy, one he struggled with daily. He had no right to feel as he did, but there was simply no "right way" to feel when one was in love with a brother's wife.

Seeing his scowl, she reached through the gate and took his hand. "Gannicus. He is my husband."

"You think it does not sadden heart to feel such a thing? I love him too. I just spent time with the man, Melitta, in effort to rekindle bond," he told her, cupping her cheek in one hand. "Guilt does not change sentiment. Imagining you with him tortures fucking mind!"

"I do understand," she told him, placing her hand on his. "I feel similar emotions when thoughts of you with Diona or that Roman woman seizes brain, but we must accept present circumstance or be destroyed by it."

He sighed. "Apologies." He took her face in his hands. "I would banish these thoughts if able."

She leaned forward. "See mind eased," she told him. "I have not lay with him this night."

"The pleasure I feel at your statement does not inspire pride."

"For me as well. He is my husband, yet I cannot lie in his arms." She raised her eyes and met his gaze. "Not when it is you I imagine touching me, kissing me, making love to me. What kind of woman am I to think such things when loving husband touches me?"

"The kind that loves another man," he told her, pulling her to him. "Just as he loves you," he whispered, and then kissed her.

Melitta moaned softly as his tongue pressed against her lips, demanding entrance, and she gave it, opening for him, as eager to taste him as he was to drink his fill of her.

They stood as such for several moments, kissing, reacquainting themselves with one another until Melitta finally pulled back, licking her kiss swollen lips. Her rioting emotions overwhelmed her, and she closed her eyes, a single tear escaped a glided down her smooth cheek.

Gannicus noticed immediately. "Why do you cry?" he asked, wiping the tear away with his thumb.

She took a deep, trembly breath. "It's Oenomaus, he knows—"

"About us?" he interrupted, deeply aware of his conflicting emotions; anxiety made his stomach cramp yet hope for all the lies to be over sprung to life as well.

"No, no about us," she replied, interrupting him, and Gannicus felt both relief and disappointment flood him simultaneously. "But, he is aware something has changed within me and questioned me on it this very night." She sighed. "I found it difficult to meet his gaze, much less break words. I feel like the worst of women! I betray my husband daily—"

"You do not betray him, Melitta," Gannicus said, cutting off her words. "We did not choose to fall in love. It simply claimed us at its will, absent choice."

Melitta knew better. "I gave my feelings light and fertile ground to grow, Gannicus. That is where my treachery lies." Recalling the sadness on Oenomaus' face when he left him, a wave of grief hit her again. "And now I am being torn asunder with feelings of guilt because my desire for you is greater than promise to honor my husband."

Seeing her in such pain robbed him of breath. He placed his hand on her cheek, wiping away another stray tear he found there. She was in constant turmoil, and Gannicus paused to take a long, hard look at how his pursuit was affecting her. His visit with Oenomaus weighed heavy on mind as well. He had begun thoughts on what he must do earlier, but had hesitated making decision. It seemed opportunity to rectify the error of his ways was presenting itself.

"I should let you go," he said, his throat closing, nearly choking him. "But the thought of being absent your touch—" His words ended abruptly as a wave of Deja-vu overwhelmed him. Octavia had said similar thing to him in defense of her actions. He had thought her extremely selfish at the time. How was he different? His actions were hurting the two people he had loved most during his time at the ludus.

Melitta reached through the bars to steady him. Seeing his face whiten in the moonlight frightened her. "Gannicus, what is it?"

"I'm doing to you what Octavia has forced upon me, and in the doing, I am bringing sorrow to those around me."

"That is absurd," Melitta replied, shaking her head in denial of his statement. "There are no similarities between the two. You have not used position to press yourself into my bed."

"Perhaps not, but I have placed my own desires above all others," he told her, recalling the times he had sought her out despite her pleading with him to let her be. "I have pursued you without thought to how it would harm you. Recklessly placing you in compromising circumstance with Oenomaus, as well as Lucretia and Batiatus." Gannicus knew what he must do, but the thought of setting himself to purpose caused knees to weaken in despair. "What kind of love do I offer when it bruises the heart of the one I cherish above all others, and brings betrayal to a man undeserving of such a fate?"

His words were forlorn, and Melitta watched with a sense of impending panic as he swallowed convulsively, as if he were choking on sadness. Her eyes raised to his and, to her shock, she saw a glistening there in his soulful brown eyes.

His expression said it all and, in that instant, Melitta realized his intent. "No." It was barely a whisper. Her heart began to pound. "Gannicus, do not do this," she said, trying to control her breathing, which was becoming increasingly difficult.

"I have to, Melitta," he said. He stroked her cheek, before sliding his hand behind her neck and pulling her to him for a brief kiss. He bowed his head, unable to gaze into her eyes as he did what must be done to save her, to save them all. "I must let you go, as I should have from the beginning."

"Gannicus!" she gasped as true fear assaulted her. Her heart thumped so hard in her chest she felt it might burst through flesh and bone at any moment. "Please," she entreated softly, her stomach knotting with anxiety. "I no longer wish such a thing."

"You should," he told her gently. "Had I not pursued you after our encounters we would not be in present predicament. You would have resumed life with Oenomaus absent the inner strife my selfish pursuit has wrought."

He gazed upon her, his heart in his eyes. "Tell me I am wrong," he said, half hoping she would, so he would not be forced to carry through with his epiphany.

However, Melitta could not tell him that because his words rang true. She would have returned to her husband and attempted to force memory of his touch to fade. Whether it would have she was not as certain, but she would have tried.

His smile was sad. "You see. You know I speak truth."

"I am uncertain if that is so, but it matters not. What might have been is of little importance presently. Today, here and now, I love you."

Hearing her openly admit her love for him nearly made him change mind, but then he recalled her tears earlier, the sadness that surrounded her heart and resolved himself to purpose.

"And, I love you," he told her, a sad smile upon his handsome face. "I have never said those words to another, but I have placed us all in tragic circumstance..." Gannicus studied her face, reveling in her beauty for a moment before he had to walk away. "Please, as much as it pains, allow me to do the right thing for once in my fucking life," he said, his voice raw and husky.

"You press me to admit tender emotions and then cast me aside?"

"I do not cast you aside, Melitta," he replied. "I am setting you free from the hardship my attachment has brought."

Footsteps were heard in the dining hall. He had to go before they were discovered. "Apologies for causing you even a moments pain. Perhaps someday… He stopped the flow of words. Their love was a dream that could never come true in the world of shit they lived in. He should have known better. "In another life," he finally said before he turned and strode away from her, across the yard. He unhooked his target and hauled it back towards his cell without looking back.

As he walked away, Melitta had to grasp the bars to keep herself from collapsing as gut-wrenching sorrow assaulted her from all sides. She felt physically ill with the pain and her stomach heaved, but she had skipped evening meal and had nothing to give. She moved down the corridor away from the gate, leaning against the stone wall until her legs gave out and she slid down the wall to sit upon the floor. She buried her face in her hands, crying softly as she lamented on how she had contributed to his decision. Why was she forever complaining about her guilt and conflicted emotions? It was true, they caused her grief, but the way she continuously mentioned her predicament gave appearance the fault was his, instead of within her own heart and mind. Tears rolled down her face as she came to terms with what just happened. He had ended it. His reasoning was sound. She could find no fault there. Moreover, it was what she had always said she wanted, yet now that it had happened… Melitta desired nothing more than to turn back time and make different choice.

*8*

Gannicus shut his door, and leaned against it for a moment, chest heaving as he fought to control the excruciating ache from within. He could not breathe and placed a hand over his heart as if that would stop the wound that seemed to spread like a living thing inside him; he could feel heart pounding, yet the muscle felt separated from chest. What had he done? He wanted to rush right back to her and beg forgiveness for his foolish choice, but he did not. With a low groan of misery, he stumbled to his bed and flopped down on the edge, head in hands, trying to keep emotions in check, but his throat was itchy and raw from unshed tears that leaked from eyes despite best efforts to hold them at bay.

His gaze landed on the amphoras of prized wine that took up an entire shelf in one corner of his cell. "If ever there was a night for fucking drink," he muttered as he dragged himself from bed, and over to his wine, "this is it."

He grabbed one of the clay containers, opened it and drank straight from the jug, gulping down several swallows before coming up for air. He wiped his mouth and went back for another long swig of the delicious amber brew. Half an amphora later, Gannicus finally started to feel the mellowing effects of the wine. He sat on the edge of his bed again, his mind replaying the scene in the yard over and again, until he felt he might go mad with it. When the amphora was empty, he threw it against the wall, feeling some satisfaction as it shattered, sending clay pieces flying and spraying the remnants of the wine left in the jug across the wall and floor.

"Fucking wine," he growled, looking down upon the broken container. "You were supposed to absent her from thought. I feel worse than ever."

Gannicus ran a weary hand through his tussled blonde hair. He was not drunk enough to banish her from mind. He was uncertain anything could achieve such a feat; yet he was determined to try. "I need more drink."

And that was when he opened another amphora.

Thank you to each of you who take the time to comment and leave fedback. You all know who you are.. ;) Your support feeds my muse, so gratitude. It is truly appreciated.