(Chapter 8)

One Hundred and Eighty

Breeze City wasn't what I thought it would be. Avery's job wasn't what I thought it would be. Avery wasn't who I thought he was.

When we got to Breeze City, things were normal for the most part. Avery told me the city was dangerous, that I shouldn't go out alone, and that he would be there for me no matter what. He said I wouldn't have to worry. The city was very grim compared to Virbank, but was much bigger. The place itself was nice, but there was litter everywhere, and some abandoned buildings scattered throughout the outskirts near the pier. The few places that felt clean, and offered a pleasant contrast to everything, were the local university, and Avery's house. It was about the size of an apartment building, but only one person actually stayed there. I hardly left the place.

The thing that struck me as weird were the amount of Avery's employees that were all over the place. They were in the entrance to his house, some of them worked in the basement, where Avery occasionally went to join them. He told me never to go down there. They were all over the streets, easily recognizable from their purple ties and suits like Avery wore.

About a month after staying there, I was trying to ignore it all, and Avery asked if I was doing okay, to which I replied that I just missed work. And he hit me with a curveball. He told me that I could go to the local school anytime I wanted. He wasn't sure about letting me work when I was still new around here, and I could easily get lost.

Now, we had spoken about college before, while I was staying in his hotel room, with Avery being the one to ask. With what I told him I was interested in, he suggested I try it out. I thought it sounded good, and we looked into it, so after that, Avery got me in, offering to pay for it all. It wasn't work, but at least it was something to do.

It was pretty rough trying to adjust to everything. I had been going to school and living with Avery for another four months. I didn't like what most of this stuff hinted at. A city overrun with crime, Avery having so many people working for him, and the luxury he always has himself surrounded with, despite living in a dangerous place like this. There were little seeds and hints all over, and I was picking them up and planting them everywhere. He often went to dinner with his men, and met his friends in public, who all had workers with them. There were Pokemon who came to his home and always went up to see Avery, the fear in their eyes was unmistakable. Some of them never left…at least not how they walked in.

I'm not smart. I never applied that label to myself, and still don't, but it didn't take a lot for me to realize what was going on. Another month in, and I couldn't take anymore. The last straw happened when we were driving to lunch one day, and he recognized someone, a Smeargle he was "collaborating" with. He and his employees got out of the car, and followed that person into a nearby alley. I was too afraid to get out, so I rolled down the window to try to listen. I was scarred by the screams of pain and sounds of punches being thrown. I could hear them begging for more time, and promising to pay Avery what they owed him. The last thing I heard was a loud bang, and then silence. I rolled the window back up before trying to regain my composure. I was completely shaken, but I stayed calm once Avery returned.

This was all so difficult to try to comprehend, because when we were alone, Avery was loving, kind, catering… but everywhere else, he appeared cold, and ruthless. He was a monster.

I decided to confront Avery about everything, and confirm my suspicions. The day I did, Avery was sitting on the couch, two of his men, a Krokorok and a Jolteon, were sitting with him. I walked up to him nervously and tapped his shoulder. He looked back at me.

"Hm? Yeah Kyle?"

I looked down nervously, honestly I was a little scared.

"Um..can I talk to you? In private?"

He nodded, and shooed away his men, and they left towards the lower floors.

I went around to the front of the couch, and sat on the opposite side of him.

"Um...Avery, are-"

"So how are you adjusting to things? Are you enjoying school?"

He smiled at me innocently, and it almost made me give in a little, but I wanted to finish what I had to say.

"It's gonna take a while. School is fine...but I wanted to ask about-"

"I hope my coworkers don't bother you, I told them not to speak to you so you should be fine."

"That's nice...but-"

"Did you wanna watch a movie while we had ti-"

"Avery! Please just let me finish."

He stopped and raised a brow at me.

"My apologies. I got a little excited because we haven't been able to talk much. I miss you Kyle…it seems like you've been a little distant lately."

Hearing that tugged at my heart strings, and I felt a little bad, but I balled up my fist, thinking about why I wanted to talk in the first place.

"I don't think I can do this anymore."

He offered a teasing smile, and scratched his head.

"What? School? Heh, I figured you'd at least finish this semester before-"

I nervously shook my head no, I already felt my heart breaking a little, and pushed back my tears.

"No Avery…this as in...us."

He looked at me, and his voice cracked a little, with confusion and sadness obvious throughout his tone and face.

"What? But...is it because I've been so busy? Have I done something? I...I don't understand, I thought you loved me..."

My throat was growing sore from trying to hold back my tears.

"I do! But I can't handle any of this! You're gone all hours of the day, the city is crime ridden, I can't go anywhere without those men, you do mysterious work, people are always coming over looking scared and helpless…and some of them never leave…You didn't tell me about any of this Avery! I came here thinking you were a pleasant business owner in a big city. Not...not a crime boss!"

This is the part where he was supposed to laugh. He was supposed to say those were all misunderstandings, and that I was exactly who I thought he was, and he could explain everything, like on TV.

Tears started streaming down my face as he sat down and sighed instead.

"I didn't think any of it mattered because we'd be together…."

He looked at me sternly, and I could only stare in disbelief.

"But it does! I don't feel right being here Avery, especially when you aren't around! I feel like I'm about to collapse from the weight of all this. I think...I want to go home."

He looked at me in shock.

"What? But...Kyle you love me right? I thought we'd be okay here, I thought you wanted to be with me as much as I want to be with you! Please just-!"

He walked over to me and put his hands on my shoulders as he spoke. His eyes told me he could fall apart any second. I was overcome by fear, and I knew he could tell. He let me go immediately.

"D-don't look at me like that. Y-you're never supposed to look at me like that. I don't want you to be afraid of me...Please, just answer the question."

I looked away and grabbed my arm, then wiped the tears that were falling.

"I...I'm not sure if I fell in love with you...or who I thought you were."

His eyes widened, then he closed them, and backed away.

"I get it."

He sat back down, and covered his face as he looked away. His eyes were red, like he was already crying, but no tears were falling.

"You don't love me then. Who you thought I was is who I am Kyle. I've never lied about how much I care for you. But this life is who I am too. They say that for love to work, we have to take the good with the bad. The good...is that you get to be here with me and live the life of luxury and safety. I want what's best for you Kyle. I love and care for you in a way words can't describe."

He got up and walked around.

"I never said I was a good person. I never said my business was flawless, and I never made any promises about what this place was like. I honestly didn't think any of it would matter to you, because you'd have me. We'd live and love together. But...can you take the bad, Kyle?"

He looked at me questioningly, and I knew this would have to be my final answer. If I said yes, I could stay here with Avery, and live "happily", getting and doing whatever I wanted, when I wanted. But, I'd also have to ignore my feelings, and force myself to be content with his work and whatever he does. And that would just make me miserable.

"No...I'm sorry I...I can't…"

Avery looked away sadly, putting one of his paws in his pockets.

"Alright."

He snapped with his other paw, and his two men from before appeared out of nowhere.

"Grab him, and take him upstairs."

Suddenly, it was as if I was talking to a different person. Avery's face was cold, almost emotionless. I saw the adoration quickly be replaced by an apathetic entity that was looking my way.

"What? Avery?"

We all walked upstairs, and his men tossed me on the bed in the spare room. Avery stood in the doorway, looking down at me. I looked up at him, fearful, yet a little angry with how I was being treated.

"Avery please, this is childish!"

He shook his head.

"No Kyle. It's just how the world works. I have somewhere to be, we can finish talking about this later."

He left, and locked the door, leaving me alone with his two men outside my room.

I sat there for hours, waiting for something, anything, to happen. I cried for the first hour, because my heart was broken from everything, before calming down and going to sleep, until Avery returned.

He explained that I would have to stay until I paid off my debt. Everything he paid for while I was dating him. Since I wasn't anymore, I was being treated like a stranger who owed him money. But he gave me a saving grace, because he still loved me. His men would leave me alone, I could still stay in his house, and he would let me finish school, because he wanted me to have a good life when I was gone. However I would have to work to pay for it, on top of what I already owed him. I could either work with his adult film crew as...a fluffer, which would save him money on the erection pills, I could go and fight in underground matches, or I could help him sell his "products", I'm sure you already know what I mean. He suggested I take the easy one, because I wasn't strong enough to fight, and I wasn't fast or athletic enough to sell anything safely.

So I started doing that. This is where the cycle started. I went to school, went home to finish homework, then went to work to perform a partial oral on adult film actors.

I threw up every night after work for the first two weeks, then eventually I started to go with the flow, and over time I wasn't so bothered anymore.

But it wasn't because I was used to doing it. The final piece of the puzzle came in because of something Avery did. Him personally.

It happened out of nowhere one day. I had just gotten home from work, and was about to go to bed, but Avery was waiting for me outside of his room. I tried to walk by and ignore him, but he grabbed my arm. I answered without looking at him.

"What."

He only looked me up and down, and I saw a very familiar look in his eyes.

"When is this charade going to end Kyle?"

He pulled me closer, and held me against his chest, putting his hands around my waist as he rubbed his nose against my neck.

"Don't you miss me? Don't you miss what we had?"

He started to kiss and lick my neck softly, and I started to feel something pressing against me. I felt his hand slide down to my pants, slowly pulling them off as he pulled me into his room.

"Don't you miss the soft touches *kiss*? The kisses? I can make you feel better about all of this every once in a while...if you let me…"

With that, I was Kyle no more. I let him take me that night, I didn't have the willpower or emotional strength to stop him, and I didn't care to. I felt like trash, like less than trash.

It wasn't the only time either. I let him take me over and over on occasion, and a piece of me chipped away each time, and before I knew it, my rings stopped glowing naturally, only doing so in moments of extreme emotional duress, and I found it hard to cry or care about anything.

Avery had broken me. He took over my mind, shattered my spirit, and...he claimed my body too. The only ones who helped me feel pretty much anything, were my friend Voltaire, who was gone before I knew it, and Alyssa, who I had known for about two months at this point. I didn't care for anything else, and my shell was the only thing left of me.

…….

I finished my story, with my head resting on my arms, looking straight ahead.

Damien didn't say anything, but sat next to me. I wasn't hurting, having told the events that led to this point. I felt how I've felt for a long time now. Empty. I only told Damien because he seemed to care, and it felt nice, but after telling the full story, I honestly felt like he'd just fuck off and never talk to me again out of pure disgust.

He said he wanted to help. But what can he even do?

We sat in silence for a bit, until finally, he sighed.

Here it comes.

"I don't even know what to say, Ky-Gray. That story is absolutely horrible. Have you told anyone else?"

I shook my head 'no'.

"Why?"

I looked at the ground, avoiding his gaze.

"Because who would care? Avery practically runs this part of town. I didn't want to risk going to another area and end up in the hands of his associates, or someone worse. I have nowhere to go, no one to run to."

I looked back at the ground.

"Not even your parents?"

My heart panged at the thought of my parents. I had thought of stowing away on a ship back home, but Avery runs them all.

"I can't go back to them. He knows where they live, he'd find me and do something horrible."

Damien grit his teeth, and I could tell he was angry about all of this. It was honestly really touching.

"I'm going to help you leave this place. You won't have to deal with this any longer."

I felt my eyes widen. I knew the risks of letting Damien be as close a friend as he was, but if Avery found out he helped me even attempt to leave…

"What?! Fuck no! I-I don't want to watch the people I care about get hurt because of a decision I made…I-"

"Stop. Stop right there. Even if that does happen, it won't be because of you. You aren't forcing anyone to get involved. I'm a perfect example. I'm getting involved on my own, because I want to help you. I want to see you happy...I… I just don't want you to suffer alone, I'll be fine as long as that isn't the case."

I felt the strain in my heart grow stronger, and I realized there was no arguing. It was really bittersweet. Someone wanted to help me, which...no one has ever outwardly said they wanted to help me before. The only thing I had to go off of were stares of sympathy, and metaphorical pats on the back from posters in the break room at work. But this… it felt nice. I smiled, before my lip quivered, and the strain on my heart finally gave in, and tears started falling. Damien gave me a look of shock.

"Shit...I probably went a little too far. I'm sorry.'

I laughed a little, and wiped my tears.

"You didn't do anything wrong...it's just been a while since anyone got me to be emotional like that."

I wiped them away, and huffed softly, letting out the stifled breath I'd been holding.

"I understand Damien. I'm just so afraid that something is gonna go terribly wrong, and I'm gonna lose someone close to me. I was so set on doing this myself, because I got myself into this, and I already lost someone before. I just… I don't know what to do. I don't know how much longer I can go on like this…"

Damien sighed.

"We can relax for now. I'll think of something. You just try not to stress out about this whole thing. Okay?"

I nodded as I stood up, and smiled.

"Okay."

The walk home was a little less dreary than it normally would be, because instead of walking alone, I walked with Damien. He only offered because he thought he made me cry, and I was fine with it, because I was a little happy. I felt like I had a true friend, someone who understood me, who knew my struggle. We didn't even talk, it just felt nice to have someone to walk with.

I couldn't let go of one thing though. The only things I knew about Damien were what I'd picked up on over time when it came to his personality, and his name. I didn't know what he had to do with Avery, or why he worked for him. The back of my mind told me to ask, because it wouldn't make sense to trust someone without knowing them better. But the part of me that wanted to let things continue so I could feel happy. I didn't want to imply I didn't trust Damien after all of that, and assumed he would tell me over time.

At least…I hope I can trust him.