Thanks to the reviewers LoveMeSomeFrankR and gr8th23 and Donnie88. I'm glad you liked it. Also thanks to those who read and those still adding this to their favorite and alert lists.
Contains scenes and references to episode 1X15 and 1X16 and 1X17.
About a week after the shooting, Danny sat his three kids down after dinner. Anna noticed the paper and ink on the table in front of the couch and wondered where this was going. Thankfully her dad was as blunt as always and just came out with it. "When was the last time you three were fingerprinted?" Danny asked.
"When I started school this year," Sean said instantly. "They did a whole big thing on safety kits. You should ask Mom what she did with it."
"Does this have anything to do with that girl on the news?" Anna asked.
"I'm a cop, Anna, I know the statistics of the number of people who go missing and don't have fingerprints or DNA on record."
"You want our DNA too?" Jack asked shocked.
"That's where I put my foot down," Anna said. "Mom!"
"Yes?" Linda asked, entering the room.
"Do you still have those fingerprint cards the school did on us?" Anna asked.
"Let me check." She grabbed her keys and walked to the coat closet at the bottom of the stairs. Soon she came up with three cards. Anna knew she had pulled them from under Danny's off duty weapon in the lock box. "Yep. Sean's was done this year, five months ago at the school, Jack's was done three years ago, and Anna's hasn't been done since Kindergarten. That can't be right. I thought we did them when we moved here?"
"No, the school offered to do them but we moved here three years after I had them done in Kindergarten. You weren't worried about them," Anna explained.
"That means you boys are excused. Anna, give me your hand," Danny said.
"Sweet," Jack and Sean cheered, racing upstairs.
"Homework first, boys. You know the rules." Linda called after them.
"Do we really have to do this?" Anna asked.
"Yes, I'm not going to find out from the news that something has happened to my kid." Danny stared her down and Anna finally held out her hand to her dad. Soon she was in the bathroom trying to scrub the ink from her fingers.
"Anna," Linda said, peaking in the door. Anna looked up into the mirror at her mom's reflection. Anna's face was unreadable, something Linda heavily cursed her grandfather-in-law for. If he hadn't taught her his old poker tricks maybe her daughter would be more open.
"I'm not mad." Anna said, seeing her mom studying her. "Dad's right, people do go missing every day in this city and the last thing he wants is to lose one of us but he has to realize that not everything he sees on the job is going to come home to haunt him. What criminal is going to be dumb enough to come after Dad's family?" Anna asked.
"That's a total 180 from what you were saying just 4 months ago."
"I know but it's true, isn't it?"
"Yeah. So you understand why he's worried? After Joe and with everything he sees, he'd be devastated if something happened to his family that he could prevent with a little overprotection. In his mind it's not overprotection if it saves a life."
"I know." Anna sighed. "However I am 14. It's like in my basic DNA to push back on him. Give him a hard time, you know?"
"I understand," Linda said as Anna dried her hands. Anna smiled then hugged her mom before going to bed.
By the next Friday, Anna realized that she was being overly tough on her dad and he was only tough on people he really cared about. Sensing she needed to go see him and knowing that it wouldn't be home for a while, she texted her mom asking permission to go to Manhattan. It took some back and forth, but Linda finally agreed and Anna made her way to Manhattan. She talked her way past the desk sergeant then made her way upstairs to the detective squad and sat down in the chair by her dad's desk. She drummed her fingers on his desk and gave Gormley a short nod and quick smile as he passed her into his office. He nodded back. Soon a hand came down over her drumming fingers and pulled her up and out of her seat. "Anna," Danny said.
When she looked up at him, he looked more curious and concerned than angry. "Dad, can we talk for a second?" Anna asked. "Mom knows I'm here, please, don't be mad."
"I'm not, she texted me letting me know you were coming. Come over here." Danny led her around the corner from his CO's office to the coffee maker. They stopped and Danny turned to her, bracing his hands on his hips, his left resting on the back of his duty weapon.
"For the last couple months, I've been kinda hard on you. You're my dad and I'm 14. Pushing back is technically what I'm supposed to do. It's like a switch. Your sweet, cuddly, little girl turns into this hard to get along with, stubborn, mouthy teen. I'm—I don't mean to, but I feel like it's part of growing up. Lately though, I've come to realize you're tough on us because you care so much and you don't want anything bad to happen. I can appreciate that." Anna finally looked up from toying with her fingers to see something in her dad's eyes. It was more than his normal poker face, it was a darkness; one that seemed to be slowly consuming him. "I don't know what case you're working on, nor do I want to know, but there's something about this case and it's getting to you. I don't mean to make it worse," Anna said.
"It's not your fault, Anna," Danny answered. It really wasn't. As hard as she had been pushing back, she had still been a bright ray of sunshine in a very dark week. Especially when she did what she did next. Anna threw her arms around his waist and hugged him tight, resting her head against his thudding heart.
"I love you, Daddy," she said softly. She could feel his body relax and his heart rate slowed down. The storm clouds hanging over his head slowly blew away and the darkness trying to claw its way out was shoved back deep inside of him. His arms wrapped themselves around the girl and held her tight trying to forget all the pain and misery this case had brought up. He squeezed his eyes shut tight and breathed in her smell. These moments had become so rare that he was going to enjoy it while she was here and willing to hug him.
"Thank you, I love you too," Danny answered. As Anna felt her dad relax, she pulled back and smiled up at him. Danny gave her the best smile he could and Anna noticed that most of the darkness had gone from his eyes. They walked back over to Danny's desk where Anna picked up her backpack and noticed a lady sitting at the desk across from Danny's. "Jack, this is my daughter, Anna. Anna, my partner, Detective Jackie Curatola."
"Nice to meet you," Anna said, offering the detective a hand to shake. The woman stood a bit and shook the offered hand. "You are taking care of my dad, aren't you?"
"As much as he needs it," Jackie answered.
"Let you in on a little secret?"
"Sure," Jackie said, smiling indulgently. Anna got the feeling she was only being humored and Jackie wasn't going to believe anything she had to say. She'd tell the detective anyway.
"Under this hardened, angry exterior, Dad's just a big, soft, squishy teddy bear." Anna poked her dad in the stomach and grinned. "I should go. It's a long train ride home and baseball tryouts are on Monday."
"Baseball?" Jackie asked. Now the detective looked curious.
Anna nodded as Danny grabbed her arm. "No way. I think you're forgetting that you're only 14 years old," Danny said, looking down at her. Anna looked from the confused female detective to her stern looking father. She knew Jackie was probably wondering what was wrong with a 14-year-old playing baseball.
"Did I say train? I meant bus. All stops included it should only take about half an hour."
"No." Danny insisted. "I will let you take the subway to your grandfather's but you're not taking the train all the way back home."
"Fine." Anna sighed. "Nice to meet you, Detective." Anna nodded to Jackie. "Bye Dad."
The subway ride seemed short and peaceful and soon Danny was picking her up from his dad's. After a rather quiet dinner on Sunday, Henry brought out cheesecake from Junior's, left over from when Frank had been shot. Danny passed on it and though Anna put a piece on her plate, she only picked at it. They talked about Danny's case, something Anna couldn't follow then Danny was up and back to work. Talk dulled around her until she heard her grandfather call her name.
"Yes, sir?" Anna asked.
"What's wrong? You love cheesecake from Junior's," Henry said.
"You say it's better than birthday cake," Jack added.
"Just worried about tomorrow. Baseball tryouts," Anna said, still toying with the cheesecake.
"Worried you won't make the team?" Jamie asked.
"Not exactly. JV is a lock. I can still pitch fast enough and hard enough that they blink and miss it, but once you're in 9th grade, you're considered for varsity."
"You think you're not good enough?" Jamie asked.
"It's not that," Anna said. Well, not completely that, she added to herself. "My school runs from seventh to twelfth grade so either team has kids I know and have played ball with before but the varsity team also has seniors on it. If I do make varsity, it's not like I'll ever get to play. Their pitcher is really good and I'm a girl so yeah. It was hard enough to make jv with my gender hanging over my head; varsity will almost be an absolute no go." Anna stared down at her cheesecake resolving herself to jv and the inability to make varsity.
"Hey," Frank said. Anna looked up at him, "you're a Reagan. You'll do fine."
Anna scoffed. "'You're a Reagan', what's that even mean?" she asked.
"You're stubborn," Frank answered, "and hardheaded, passionate, and you have that fire in your belly that makes you capable of achieving whatever you put your mind to. You're like your dad." Frank smiled.
Anna sighed and nodded. After a brief moment, she wiped her hands on her napkin, placed it on the table, pushed her cheesecake to her brothers then stood. "I need some air," Anna said, "excuse me, please." Anna walked out back and sat down on the back steps.
"What did I say?" Frank asked.
"I'm sure it's nothing, Frank," Linda answered. Frank nodded but wasn't sure he believed her. Anna stared up at the darkening sky thinking over what they had just said inside. It wasn't really what her grandfather had said; it was what he had implied. That she wouldn't be a real Reagan if she set her mind to something and failed. "Anna," Linda said, sitting down next to her daughter. "What's wrong?" Anna looked up at her mom confused. "Anna, you may look more like me than your dad but your mannerisms and personality are just like your dad. I've spent close to sixteen years studying him and 14 and a half raising you. I know you, Anna. I may spend more time with the boys, but I do know a lot about my daughter. This has something to do with what your grandfather said. Maybe not exactly what he said but the implication behind it."
"He said that Reagans can do anything they set their minds to and I know I'm going to do everything in my power to make it and I'll play like it's the clutch situation of the year and everything's on the line, but ..." Anna took a deep breath and then another, choking back tears. "What if Grampa is wrong? What if I play my heart out and I don't make it? Does that mean that I'm not a real Reagan? I know that things always work out for Dad and Uncle Jamie and Aunt Erin, but ..." The tears over took her at that point and she couldn't continue.
Linda wrapped her in a hug and held her close. As she rubbed Anna's back, Linda wondered exactly what was bothering her. Sure, Anna had implied that she was worried that she wasn't a real Reagan if she didn't make it but Linda wondered if that's really what was bothering her or if it wasn't as deep. "But?" Linda asked gently, tipping Anna's head up to look the teen in the eyes.
"If I'm not good enough to make varsity when I put my entire heart and soul into it does that mean I'm not good enough to be a real Reagan?"
So there it was. Out there in plain English for her mom. Anna's biggest fear was that as the oldest grandchild and Danny's oldest child she may not be good enough to her dad and granddad. Linda smiled gently and brushed the tears away. "Sweetie, I know that right now you're putting yourself under more pressure than necessary. Your grandfather's words in there did not help. I may not be a Reagan by blood but I've sat at enough Reagan Sunday dinners and holidays to know that each and every single one of those people in there will be extremely proud that you gave 110%, everything you have, whether you make it or not. No one is going to be disappointed if you don't make it. No one but you."
"But Dad—"
"Your dad works harder than any other detective and by doing so he sacrifices time with his family. If he can't take the time to help you practice for tryouts and would rather be working than watching ball games, then he's not allowed to be angry if you don't make it. I'll let you in on a little secret that your uncle Joe told me about your dad. Don't tell him you know." Anna nodded, eager to hear a secret about her dad. One she hoped had something to do with the situation. Joe could bond with anyone and while he was true he loved his sister-in-law, Anna knew the two hadn't been super close. "The first time your dad took the driver's test, he failed."
Anna scoffed, looking back up at the sky. "Written tests never were Dad's strong suit."
"The driving portion," Linda corrected. "Speeding, cutting corners, not following directions, and he hit two cones during the parallel parking part. The instructor failed him and wouldn't let him retest for three months. When he did take the test again, he had this hippy chick who only passed him to get a date with him."
"So it's okay if I don't make it?" Anna asked.
"Of course it is. We're proud of you either way. You know Joe would be too. Plus, I'm sure he'll be right there with you," Linda said.
"I like to think he's become my new guardian angel. He earns those wings if he is," Anna said. "Thank you, Mama."
Linda smiled and hugged her daughter. She left her daughter on the steps as she got up and went back inside to find her sons. Anna took a deep breath and slowly let it out. She knew her mom was right and that outwardly her family would show nothing but the utmost support for her, but part of her wondered how many of them would be inwardly disappointed. Thankfully, when she woke up on Monday morning, most of that doubt and fear was gone and at lunch Jim talked the rest of it out of her head.
When Anna got home that night, she found her brothers at the table doing homework, her mom in the kitchen making dinner, and her dad nowhere to be seen even though his Jeep was parked on the curb. She dropped her backpack and equipment bag on the couch then ruffled Jack's hair and hugged Sean from behind. "Someone seems a little happy," Sean said.
"Not happy but not upset either. Got to play a good game of ball today," Anna said. "Mom, where's Dad?" Anna asked.
"In the shower, he'll be down for dinner. How'd it go?" Linda asked.
"Let's wait until Dad's here too," Anna said.
"That good, huh?" Linda asked.
Anna could tell her mom felt bad. "I want to tell everyone together," Anna said lightly. Linda turned to look at her daughter, but as was becoming more common, Linda was unable to read her face.
"Okay, but your stuff doesn't go on the couch," Linda told her.
Anna sighed trying not to roll her eyes. She put her baseball bag in the closet then put her book bag on the chair in the kitchen. "Happy?" Anna asked, sarcastically.
"Ecstatic. Hands; then set the table. Boys, get cleaned up for dinner," Linda told her daughter then called to the boys at the table. Soon they sat down for dinner and Jack and Sean talked about their days. Linda turned to Danny as Anna continued to eat and make no effort to tell them what happened. "How's the case?" Linda asked.
"Finally nailed him. Not without a fight though." Danny motioned to the scrape on the side of his face. "How were tryouts?" Danny asked turning to Anna.
"Fine," Anna answered, nonchalantly.
It went dead silent in the house for nearly a full minute as everyone stared at Anna. When Danny realized she wasn't going to elaborate, he pushed. "Just fine? You've been worked up about tryouts for three weeks and now that they're over, they went just fine?" Danny asked.
"Yeah, pretty much," Anna answered.
"Did you at least make the team?" Jack asked.
"I made the team."
"You made varsity?" Danny sounded shocked.
"Jack asked if I made the team and he didn't specify which one. Yes, I'll be playing baseball this spring."
"Anna," Danny warned, staring her down like a perp who was jerking him around.
Anna finished the rest of the spaghetti on her plate as well as the piece of garlic bread then downed her milk before looking at her dad. "I'm throwing 85 miles per hour but I can't hit hard enough and I can't beat an outfield throw home and apparently that's what counts at varsity level." Anna turned her eyes to her mom. "Can I go now?"
"No," Danny said.
"Yeah," Linda answered. Anna took Linda's answer over Danny's and left the table putting her dishes in the dishwasher.
"Tomorrow morning I'm going to go—" Danny started.
"To work as normal, Danny. She's got three more years to make varsity. I know you've always been more into football and hockey than baseball, but why don't you try working with her first. Take her to the batting cages or for a run. It could help both of you," Linda explained.
"Yeah, Dad. You're always helping us with football and soccer and stuff, why not help Anna?" Sean added.
"Eat," Danny told him.
"I'm finished," Sean answered.
"Jack?" Danny asked.
"Me too, but if you want my opinion, I don't think you spend as much time with Anna as you do with us. I get it, you're busy and she doesn't like much of the same stuff as you do but you should try. That's what you always tell us. Find something in common," Jack replied.
"Clear your plates," Danny sighed. Jack and Sean shared a confused look. Danny had asked for their opinion and now he seemed mad that they had disagreed with him. None the less they got up and took their plates to the kitchen noticing that Anna had moved to the doorway between the living room and the kitchen where she couldn't be seen by their parents in the dining room.
"Danny, just try okay? Last night after you left dinner, she told us about tryouts and your dad said that she was a Reagan and that meant she could do anything she set her mind to."
"She can, Linda."
"Well, today she gave 110% and she failed. What does that say about her being a Reagan?"
"She became a Reagan the day she came into this family." Danny dropped his voice unsure if any of his children could still hear him. "Her not making the varsity team doesn't mean I love her any less than I love her brothers."
"It just means you're disappointed in her," Linda sighed. She knew that was going to happen.
Anna closed her eyes and leaned back against the door jamb. She knew just to her left Jack and Sean were standing in the kitchen just out of sight of their dad's seat in the dining room. Jack pressed a finger to his lips as he looked at Sean who nodded. "I'm not disappointed, Linda. Would I have been thrilled if she made the varsity team? Absolutely. Was I expecting her to? No. I know she loves baseball but ..." Danny trailed off unsure. "But I'm not sure she has the same passion for sports the boys do." Linda sighed heavily, looking at her husband plainly. "Don't look at me like that. I will support her until this world comes to an end no matter what she chooses to do, but I know that baseball probably won't be the biggest thing in her life for long."
"If she wants it to be?" Linda asked softly.
"Then she's going to have to work ten times as hard as the boys. I love my little girl and I really do think she can do anything she wants but you and I both know that boys and girls are built differently and unless she's putting in ten times the effort, her body won't be able to put out the same kind of result the boys get naturally. I will try to help her but you and I both know that ever since we moved to Staten Island things haven't been the same between her and I. That was about the same time she started preferring Joe over me. Like I made her leave the city so she quit turning to me."
Linda and Anna sighed at the same time. "Those two things aren't related," Linda answered. "We moved to Staten Island because our two bedroom apartment in Manhattan wasn't big enough for us and three kids. It was pushing it having her and Jack share the same room. She was eight and didn't need our attention that much so she felt like she was being left out. When you have a four year old and a new baby something's gotta give. Joe always made an effort to be there for her when you were stretched thin. Danny, she knows you love her and she loves you, just be there for her," Linda said.
At that point Anna and the boys went up to their rooms and Anna did what was left of her homework before starting to study her new signal guide from her coach. It explained the signals the catcher would use to communicate with her about her pitches.