Standard Disclaimer: I do this because my ADHD hyperfocus makes me write instead of like... work. I make no money off of this. My name is not Veronica Roth.
"Now, Beatrice, you remember what you must do," my mother whispers as we enter the Choosing Ceremony. "It's different than in the past. The decisions will be made in private. After you've decided, you will have the option to meet us or, if not, just skip ahead to your preparations for your faction. Everything is your choice from this moment on. Do you want my father and I to be waiting for you?"
I think for a moment before responding. "I think it will be best for father to go to Caleb. I suspect he will not be returning to Abnegation, and it will be good for him to have comfort that he's not disappointed his parents."
She smiles fondly at me and wraps me in a tight embrace. "I was not born to be forced," she whispers in my ear. I turn my lips to her ear and respond, "I will breathe after my own fashion."
She pulls away slightly to look at me, fondness and love shining in her eyes. I return her smile and we say in unison, "Let us see who is the strongest."
I pull her tightly one more time before turning to enter the room. "Be Brave, Beatrice," I hear her call softly behind me.
I enter the room of dependents, all waiting for the biggest moment of their lives. All five faction leaders are there in the room – Marcus from Abnegation, Jack from Candor, Max from Dauntless, Jeanine from Erudite, and Johanna from Amity. As the final dependents take their seat, Johanna begins speaking.
"Welcome, everyone, to the first day of the rest of your lives. If any of you have been present at previous Choosing Ceremonies, you may notice that things are a little different this year. Although testing remains the same, it was brought to our attention that the public nature of the ceremonies may not be producing the most accurate results. Jeanine will be explaining more in detail."
Jeanine stepped forward. "The factionless population has been increasing dramatically in recent years, particularly among younger faction members. We believe, due to the pressures from families and factions at these public events, dependents are being pressured to choose a specific faction, rather than the faction they should actually belong to. Our goal with the new process is to remove the familial and societal pressures behind choosing and allow all of you the freedom to make the selection that is actually best for you."
Max stepped forward to speak next. "This new process is a trial. The intention is to test out this process over the next several years to determine if the faction spread changes and if the movement from faction to factionless is reduced. This class will be the first year, but it will continue on unless unforeseen issues arise."
Next, Jack spoke up. "From here, everyone will enter the hallway behind us. Each room will have a door with your name on it. You will enter that room and make your faction selections in complete privacy. There will be no outside pressures. After you've made your selection, you will have the opportunity to meet privately with your families. You will also use this time to physically prepare for your faction. To reduce the prejudice that transfers face upon arriving to their new factions, you will be provided the appropriate attire for the faction you have selected. Your parents may assist you with this, or you can make preparations privately."
"From the moment you step through the doors behind us, you will have 35 minutes to make your selection, say goodbye to your family, and make your preparations. You will then proceed to your designated faction zone to move on to your new homes," Marcus completed the explanations. "We encourage you all to put all expectations aside and choose the faction that you belong in. You may all proceed."
Caleb and I walk together into the hallway with the rest of our class. The doors are arranged alphabetically by our last names, so we come to a stop side by side, facing our doors. Caleb reaches out and squeezes my hand tightly.
"I know it is not the Abnegation way, Beatrice," he starts. "But you must think of yourself. For the sake of the factions."
"You as well, Caleb," I respond kindly. "We must be true to ourselves, for the sake of the factions."
He releases my hand and we both enter our rooms. I wonder how long it will take Caleb to decide. I also wonder if I should pretend to take my time – are they monitoring that? Does it look suspicious if I know immediately, or should I be contemplating it? We've all had 24 hours to contemplate. I wouldn't think we would need more.
I move forward swiftly to the computer in front of me and place my hand on the screen. It reads my handprint and my name appears on the screen, along with the five faction icons. I reach forward and make my selection. A second prompt appears. "Are you sure?" I select the green button for yes.
"Welcome to Dauntless!"
The words seem unreal on the screen in front of me. I am excited to move forward and start this new journey. Unfortunately, I can't seem to ignore the nerves as well. I know what is coming. I know what my duty is. And I know the dangers. I made this choice of my own free will for the good of society.
Taking a deep breath to calm my nerves, I move towards the door marked "family". When I enter the room, as we had discussed, my mother is waiting inside. She jumps up when she sees me, rushing forward to pull me into a long embrace.
"I am proud of you no matter what you chose, Beatrice," she promises me.
"I chose to be brave, mother," I smile back.
I'm not sure I've ever seen my mother smile so widely. "I will help you prepare."
She guides me into the room next door where we are to prepare. Inside, there are outfits sized to my specifications from all five factions. She grabs the Dauntless uniform without hesitation and hands it to me.
As I begin to change out of my clothes, she pulls out a small bag. I recall seeing her carrying it earlier, but never asked what was in it. My mother turns me to face the mirror once I've finished changing. The new clothing is significantly different from what I've worn all my life, but I expected that, and I love it. The black pants and tank top are the most risqué clothing I've ever worn in my life. The tank top is revealing, and the pants are tight. The boots feel strange on my feet. The feeling of the leather jacket on my arms is unlike anything I've ever felt. But when I see myself in the mirror, I finally feel like me.
"I went a little over and beyond," my mother says, grinning behind me in the mirror. I look up to meet her eyes and see her holding makeup and scissors. "The long hair will immediately give you away for being from Abnegation. The makeup is completely optional, however. I just wanted you to have the choice."
She cuts my hair short. It feels strange. If not for the clothing, I'd look like a boy. At 16, I still haven't completely filled out yet, and with the short hair and lack of curves, the lack of femininity is unavoidable. Once upon a time, that may have bothered me. When I had made my decision to join Dauntless, I stopped caring. Being feminine didn't matter to the Dauntless – being brave is all that matters.
My mother helps me apply light makeup. It's not much, but it's enough to help me blend in with the other factions. Abnegation women do not wear makeup, so if I show up without some form of makeup, it will be extremely obvious where I come from. Her last piece of help surprises me.
"This is only temporary," she warns, holding up what appears to be an aerosol can. "But there will be places once you've settled in that will offer more permanent solutions."
"What is it?" I ask curiously.
"This is temporary hair dye," she explains. "All I could get my hands on was black, but I thought it fit fairly well for Dauntless anyway. This will last you through only about two to three showers, so if you want to maintain it, you'll want to go for a permanent solution. We just do not have time for that process right now."
I nod my head. "Yes, lets do it." My mother smiles at the excitement in my voice.
Once she's finished applying the temporary hair dye, I observe myself in the mirror again. I look like a brand-new person. I don't recognize myself, but I love it.
"You have five minutes to proceed to your new faction leaders." As the announcement comes over the intercom, I give my mother a nervous glance.
She holds my hands in front of me and waits for me to make eye contact – an unnatural feeling action for someone from Abnegation.
"You are ready, Beatrice," she promises. "We have trained for this. Remember – they may not know what faction you come from, but they will know you are a transfer. You must appear weaker and less experienced than the Dauntless born initiates, at least in the beginning. You do not want to attract too much attention."
"But what if I fail?" I ask, panic evident in my voice. "What if they find out what I am?"
Her warm smile shows nothing but faith and encouragement. "If I didn't think you were ready, I would have encouraged you to go to Amity instead. But you are ready. You know what to expect. You know how to get through the simulations without notice. You are ready, Beatrice." I have calmed down a bit, but panic still lingers, and she notices. "I know there are two Autonomous already in place in Dauntless. Of course, as is our way, I do not know their identities, but I do know one is a higher rank in their system, and another stays in the lower ranks to blend in. You have your communicator and know how to avoid the cameras. You know what to say and you know how to reach out. If you are in danger and it gets to the point where you are unsafe, you send the notice, and I will make the arrangements. I promise you, Beatrice. You can do this."
I take a deep breath. "You're right. I'm ready. I love you."
"I love you, my dear." She gives me one last hug.
We both say our parting words, "No person is free who is not master of himself" and then exit through opposite doors.
I seem to be one of the last to enter the new room. The division amongst the factions is clear. Even without the leadership standing in their designated areas, the stark differences would make it obvious. I make my way to the group of people milling around Max and take my place.
My eyes seek out my brother in the crowds. As I had expected, he is absent from Abnegation. I do not see him in Amity or Candor, but when my eyes move to the group of Erudite, I see him standing calmly behind Jeanine. I try my best not to worry. Caleb was not like me, nor was he trained like me. He hasn't been training and preparing for Erudite all his life – he just feels that is where he truly belongs. I hope he makes it.
Each faction breaks off on its own to leave the building, most walking calmly in an organized fashion behind their leaders. The Dauntless, however, always have to stand out. When we exit the room, a large group of Dauntless members are waiting for us. They appear to mostly be the family members of that days group, but some appear to be younger than that. I wonder if they are siblings or just other members of leadership.
A blonde man steps forward to address us. He's on the younger side with tattoos up his neck. His eyebrow is pierced and his hair is shaved up the sides and clearly styled with some kind of product. I expect him to introduce himself, but instead, all he says is "Let's go!"
All the Dauntless members and Dauntless born initiates start running. It's an immediate clear division of who is a transfer, as they all stand back in confusion. I grin at the girl next to me and hold out my hand.
"You heard him!" I say, my voice full of excitement, "It's time to run!"
As she and I take off, the other transfers follow close behind. I'm practically dragging the poor girl behind me and make a note to slow down a bit. I have been training for this, she probably hasn't.
I look back at her and she's laughing. We both must look like maniacs, running through the streets and laughing uncontrollably, but we don't care.
We follow the rest of the Dauntless as they climb the train supports. As the train slows, I look at my new friend and grin. "Get ready! It doesn't stop!"
The look of surprise on her face is immediate, but we don't have time for her to get through her shock. I take off at a jog next to the train, grabbing the first handle I can. I pull myself into the train and reach out my hand. She grabs it and I pull her into the train car.
She's unsteady on her feet as she lands, knocking into me and causing us both to tumble to the floor. We're a tangle of limbs, but we both look at each other and burst out laughing. We separate and dust ourselves off. I get to my feet and hold out my hand to help her up.
"Christina," she introduces herself, shaking my hand.
Smiling back, I reply, "I'm Tris!"
As we take in our surroundings, I notice the blonde man from earlier giving us a calculating look. As I meet his eyes, his eyebrows raise in challenge, and he pushes off the wall he was leaning on.
"Initiates are supposed to be on the last train car," he says dryly.
Christina looks at me, and we both burst out laughing. When he continues to stare at us, Christina looks up and says, "Well, you probably should have provided clearer instructions than Let's go, don't you think?"
She must be from either Candor or Erudite.
The train starts slowing down and he shrugs. "I just hope you're equally as prepared for arrival as you were for departure." Another passenger reaches up and hits the button to open the door, and the blonde main turns and runs to the door, and then jumps out.
Christina and I rush forward in time to see him roll gracefully onto the roof.
"They're trying to kill us!" Christina screams over the excited yells of the jumping faction members.
I grin and grab her hand. "Together."
Hand in hand, we run screaming towards the door and jump over the ledge onto the building. I force myself to land less gracefully than I could. The rocks dig painfully into my knees, but Christina and I both lay still on the ground for a moment, waiting for the adrenaline to wear off.
"That was amazing," she says, laughing as we help each other up.
"It's the Dauntless way!"
Quote Credits:
"I was not born to be forced. I will breath after my own fashion. Let us see who is the strongest." - H.D. Thoreau
"No person is free who is not master of himself." - Epictetus