In response to your comments, N.O Boddy...
1. I did a rewrite of my original story and left out the whole part of them meeting furry aliens and going to Fiorina 161. Instead, she stays on the Sulaco and crashes down here. If you check out recent chapters of Ernie 073, it's got an explanation, and it's eventually going to connect to this one.
2. About your multiple comments, it's okay. Nothing against you, the site just automatically puts comments on hold if you don't have a FF account. I have to manually go in and click approve, or they might take a few days to show up. I didn't even know I had extra comments until now.
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Slight revisions to Chapter 2:
"I'm sorry, sir. I don't understand your language...Do you still have that floating jellyfish with Bishop's head?"
The Amberjack colored creature only barked like a dog. Its neck fins wiggled.
...
The gold-green bird thing preened itself for a moment, then made a crocodile noise.
Bird Thing transferred its computer device to its feet, spreading its dainty upper arms and its wings. The fish fins around its head stretched and glowed.
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I swallowed hard. Such punishments...for my little friend's only guardians! "You...would not destroy Newt, would you?"
Mr. Rogers smiled. Never her. She is still young, and incapable of the type of violence the two adults committed. And with the proper obedience training, she could be a wonderful pet."
A globe materialized on the desk. I'd studied that globe many times, but it hadn't been in that classroom, it had been in my cage at the lab. Out of a lack of anything better to do, I'd memorized the locations of all the continents and countries...Well, most of them. I didn't know where to find Czechoslovakia, I didn't have all the African countries down, I felt certain Wakanda was on there somewhere...and where did Oompaloompa Land fit in? Roger the lab guy said it shifted around in the ocean like the island from Lost, but I'd never watched that program.
I spun the globe. "She'll never be happy without others of her kind."
We can find other pets for her to live with.
Newt had progressed to building her tiny city in the air. It reminded me of what that red helmeted guy did in the X-Men comic books.
Such a sophisticated mind, I thought. It didn't seem fair to lump her together with any sort of `pet.' "That's not the same. She and Ripley have a history."
Hupbucu looked pained. That's...part of the problem, actually. I think removing her from those negative influences will make her a much better pet, possibly even a better full fledged citizen, if she properly impresses the governing body...
"I disagree. I believe if I have a conversation with the two adult humans, they will understand the gravity of their mistake and change their behavior without having them sent away, or...the other drastic measures you described."
A short haired, freckle faced teacher appeared beside me, scowling through her hornrims. She vanished. More ghosts from Newt's mind.
This isn't how it works, Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik. You and your friends have no legal standing. He touched the digital whiteboard, making star charts appear. Now, there are several habitable worlds we can choose from. Trelsonceep,for example, is very nice...comfortable weather, carnivore friendly...
Video appeared on the whiteboard: A place like the Florida Everglades, but neon purple and populated by anemone-bamboo. An Australian-like Outback with floating rust orange boulders and porcupine quilled penguins scampering about...
"It's lovely, but Ripley simply must be present to give her opinion on this. She will resent me forever if I just randomly choose a place for her. I wish I could show you the location of the earth. It would make this so much easier...Did you search the spaceship debris? There may be some useful information in the computers that can help you locate earth."
It's too cold. Our scouts barely retrieved the bodies of your victims. Perhaps if the Court can grant an extension and an escort, you may go on an expedition to locate it, but that's a big if.
A slightly unpleasant wet adobe-grass smell, like a rotting Chia pet, wafted through the air. Hupbucu waved a wing, briefly disrupting the illusion. Alien flatulence, perhaps?
"If you can't find the debris, how did you find the bodies?"
They wore special tracking units.
"That's unfortunate."
Indeed.
I tapped the girl on the shoulder. "Newt, I need to ask you something."
Newt continued playing with her blocks, but a copy of herself appeared next to me. This made me a little uncomfortable. She wouldn't have my full attention, but I attempted communication anyway. "Newt, this is a very important decision. We need to know where you'd prefer to live, if we can't find the earth."
"I wanna stay with Ripley."
I frowned. "...Okay, thank you. Now, what if you needed to decide for her? Ripley can't decide where to go...Did you want to stay here, where you might go outside and endure freezing temperatures? Or did you want to live on one of these warmer planets, with plenty of interesting creatures and food?"
She wrinkled her brow, staring at the video recordings playing on the electronic whiteboard for a long time.
At last she pointed to a tropical place, populated with rabbit-like lifeforms. "That one."
That's Gupidra, said Hupbucu. Isolated, but very nice. And the Ganati are acceptable food prey.
"Thank you, Newt. I'll talk to Ripley about it."
A ventilation register popped open, and out crawled a Ss'sik'chtokiwij larva in a red and yellow scarf.
She looked so much like my daughter that I whimpered and sneezed when I saw her. "Shauqauzjarruba?...Esther?"
The larva scampered up to me. "Mom! I'm so glad you're here! It's so lonely, I just have Mister Hupbucu, and we're not learning anything new..." She clambered up on me, so I cradled her in my arms. "I don't understand...Forgive me, what is your name, child?"
"You never gave me one. You only call me Newt. That's not my name."
Hupbucu leaned over my shoulder plate. You're holding Newt's other personality, Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik. The stronger part of her psyche. I would be careful with that.
"I will. She's precious to me." I stroked the larva's shell. "Very well, child...I name you...Ssolizedus, `The toughest Ss'sik'chtokiwij in the universe.'"
She purred.
"Why are you wearing that scarf? Is it because you know I miss my daughter Shauqauzjarruba?"
"No. It's for house Griffindor."
I smiled, gladdened she hadn't done this as a psychological game. "My apologies for making the assumption.
"Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik,teach me how to be a good Ss'sik'chtokiwij."
"Be yourself, Newt, I mean, Ssolizedus. That is when you will be the best possible Ss'sik'chtokiwij."
"You're full of crap. Teach me," she insisted.
I sighed. "Fine. But let us resolve this problem with our friend Ripley first."
Ssolizedus nodded.
I sighed, relieved that I could at least postpone this descent into madness.
I turned to face the warden. "You're a reasonable creature, and you bothered to speak with me, despite me being...persona non grata. Why can't you...serve as Ripley's attorney? Speak on behalf of those who have none to speak for them?
Mister Rogers flapped his arms, and the dream illusion faded. Once again I looked into a fuzzy spider face attached to an ostrich body.
In the dream, my claws and body had been able to move around freely, but now they once again resumed their fixed, immobilized position behind my back in the glowing restraints.
The armored creatures that earlier accompanied me to the room had disappeared, even to my heat vision, but with the closed entry hatch, I couldn't tell whether they stood guard outside.
The creature still spoke to me in the zombie voice, indicating it had kept some sort of mental connection open. I would like to help you, Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik, but as your warden, The court limits the ways in which I can involve myself in your case.
I tried not to admire Hupbucu's drumsticks, though they did look tasty. "Please. Interview the woman and ask her where she wants to go."
Hupbucu's neck shortened as he made a gurgling sound, their equivalent of a groan. I have, Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik. Let's just say she has been unhelpful.
"She refused to tell you?"
Hupbucu preened himself. She demanded to go to earth, and when I told her I don't know where that is, she demanded a spaceship. I can't give her a spaceship, Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik.
"What about a...friendly pilot? Someone who can...taxi her to her planet?"
You're asking for a little much, Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik. No one is going to volunteer to fly you for light years in a random direction through space based on a non-entity's guesswork. The warden paused. Actually...You just gave me an idea. We have something called a Siatolumeser, a creature rights society...
I wagged my tail. "Like legal rights?"
No...it's...I'd think you'd call it a `humane...society...for animals? Yes?
My tail drooped. "Ah. Well, it sounds promising."
Yes, we'll see if we can get you an advocate through there. In the meantime, I believe you should meet with the Ripley woman. Not for the purposes you suggested, mind you, we just want to determine the best possible home for her, considering how we can't locate this `earth' place.
"I noticed your jail seems rather...small."
There's a good reason for that, Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik. This whole planet is technically a prison. We exile felons to this place. `Manslaughter' cases. Behave well and you get to stay in the refuge cities. The troubled ones have to tough it out in the wilderness. We only use lock-up as a temporary holding place...Hupbucu made a rolling gesture with a hand that had transformed into a baby alien limb. Until the court makes a decision about their case.
"Sounds like this would make a dangerous home."
Not necessarily. You've met our law enforcement.
"The...muscular creatures in armor?"
He nodded. Yautja. We have several patrolling the compound. Of course, our citizens generally tend to be well behaved. After all, some of our prisoners have started families...I wish I could give you more time, but I've just been informed of a food shortage.
"What about those bugs Newt has been eating?"
They're stale. He showed me several different planets and told me their names. Certainly one of these would be agreeable to your friends.
I frowned. "Yes...it would seem...May I speak to the Ripley woman before I choose a place for them?"
Hupbucu paused in thought. Perhaps that would be a good idea. Speaking to someone she knows might encourage her to cooperate. You willbeunder guard, of course, but I'll at least give you the opportunity.
He picked up his little device, resuming the activity I'd seen him doing when I'd first entered the room.
"Those beads and that device...are you translating or transcribing something?"
Legal documents. Not everyone speaks Ucakteb.
"How wonderful! Have you ever thought of translating The Bible in this way?"
What's the bible?
The warden groaned when heard my explanation.
He tapped a button and the door slid open. In marched the armored creatures, hoisting me roughly by my dog collar. "Wait! What about Newt? I think she should also be present!"
Hupbucu only gurgled and shook his head. Newt waved goodbye to me, and out I went into the rotunda with the weird architecture. The door clanged shut with an air of finality.
The metal plated monsters dragged me back down the prison corridor.
As previously mentioned, not much to this prison, due to it serving mainly as a holding place for trials. Ironically, Ripley's cell stood right next to mine.
My jailers flashed wrist bangles at a panel along the wall, and the door aperture appeared.
My curly haired human friend and her male associate had been lying in wait beside the wall nearest to me. The moment we stepped in, Hicks punched a guard, and she attempted to jump out into the hallway, but Hicks got clobbered, and an invisible jailer shoved her to the floor the moment she made the attempt.
The woman lay on her back, silently glaring at me and my companions.
I stepped forward, wishing I had my arms free to make peaceful gestures. Of course, I suppose my bonds did indicate helplessness. "Miss Ripley..."
The woman struck me in the face. Not the first time I'd been punched by a human. Our shells only look soft and rubbery. She came away with a sore hand.
"Ellen, I don't think that's a great—" Hicks warned a little too late.
The jailers gave me questioning grunts, like `You want me to rough her up?' One made a chuckling sound.
I shook my head. "I forgive her."
I don't think they understood. One of them shoved Ripley to the floor again.
"Hey! No!" I stepped in between them. "Friend! Okay?"
The Yautja gave me a growl that seemed like `Why didn't you say that?'
"You!" Ripley snarled. "I should have know you were behind this bullshit! How long have you been plotting this revenge?"
"Revenge is mine, sayeth the Lord," I quoted. "As you can see, I am in chains myself."
She only scoffed. "I bet that's just for show. What the hell do you want?"
"Were you informed about why you're here?"
Ripley rolled her eyes. "We killed and ate a couple citizens."
"Yes. I tried to convince the warden you wouldn't do it again, but they view you like a rabid animal."
Her eyes narrowed. "Did you come in here to gloat?"
"No, I wanted to get your opinion on an issue that will directly affect your immediate future. First of all, Newt is safe, and is being treated very well by the warden. I have actually been sent here on the warden's behest. You see, they don't know how to find the earth, and they're looking for alternatives."
"There's no alternative! I'm not going to some dead rock in the middle of fucking nowhere!"
"Miss Ripley, Please. I've told them your preference for earth, and how I wish to locate the remains of the Sulaco, in order to retrieve the proper flight data, but in the event of this not happening, am I correct in assuming you'd prefer a warm, comfortable planet, to being sent out into the freezing climate beyond this compound? I asked Newt her opinion, and she chose Gupidra. It's warm, has beaches, and fuzzy little lifeforms that you can eat."
The woman fumed in silence.
"I have seen some very beautiful, idyllic options. I would compare them to...Hawaii...Or New Zealand."
"Hawaii is under the ocean."
"Yes, well, not this one."
She clenched and unclenched her fists again, not speaking.
"I requested that Newt remain with you."
"Will other humans be there?"
"Not...that I'm aware of. These...creatures...classify you as pets. The warden has mentioned `obedience schools.' I guessed that you would not appreciate that."
"You guessed fucking correctly. Sounds like a bunch of Planet of the Apes bullshit to me."
I sighed. "So you prefer uninhabited worlds."
The woman sighed. "Honestly, we need to stay here. It's our only chance to get transportation home."
"I must remind you that the weather has dropped to negative digits."
She shook her head. "So be it. We'll deal."
"Ripley," the man blurted. "You sure about this? A tropical vacation...It sounds like paradise."
"There's no people, Hicks. No doctors, no schools for Newt, except maybe dog obedience school. Isn't that right, Ernie? You said `uninhabited.'"
"Y-yes. That was my understanding. Also, I think obedience school would be on a separate planet."
"So we'd be basically playing Lost in Space."
"No, they have a definite plan for where they're going to put you."
Ripley groaned and smacked her face. "It's a show, Ernie. The Swiss Family Robinson in space."
"Oh...I see. They never showed me that one."
She scoffed. "Anyway, there's my answer. We're staying."
"But how? How will you survive?"
"Ernie, you've given me a bunch of shitty options, and staying here is the least shitty. I can either die of hypothermia here, or die in the middle of nowhere from a broken leg and a sudden food shortage, or a hurricane in...Hawaii. But here there's a chance I can find some kind of outpost, with supplies. And the ship's navigational computers. Hell, maybe I can build a little house out of the space station debris."
"Do you promise not to kill any more of those bug bird things?...Or guys like our jailers?"
"I...want to say yes, but I don't know what I'll do if I get too hungry. And if anyone attacks me while I'm out there, deal's off."
I nodded. "I'll inform the warden. Perhaps he can provide you with supplies and such. You will probably need them...To keep the citizenry safe from being consumed."
Ellen's fists balled tight enough to turn red.
"How have you been otherwise?"
The woman laughed bitterly and crossed her arms. "Oh yeah, I'm just peachy! Stuck in some cinder block for two days, can't go anywhere or do anything, but I'm fine!"
I sighed and shook my head. The Yautja glanced at me and gestured to the door.
"Can I stay in here with them?" I asked.
One jailer made sounds that implied `Your funeral.'
The other one, though, grunted and shook its head, probably meaning, `You have to ask the warden first.'
"You're presuming I actually want you in here," Ripley growled.
I sighed. "Sorry you feel that way. I will go, but please understand I am not your enemy, I am currently standing in your defense, in a fashion similar to a lawyer."
She silently fumed. "If you wanted to make me like you more, Ernie, you just picked the shittiest way to do it. I can't stand lawyers."
"My apologies."
As I made my way out the door, she gave one final parting shot: "Do me a favor: Stop trying to help me. Everything you touch turns to shit."
I got returned to my cell, and there I sat for a long time. I imagine if they recorded me, they'd see how well I behaved in captivity throughout all this. Perhaps this had been the reason for my preferential treatment, not sure.
Another seeming eternity passed before my cell door appeared again.
Another species of alien, this one with the figure of a plump human woman, clad in a Cheongsam style dress that left the bosom completely exposed. If her chest hadn't been fluffy and featureless as a bird, it would have been scandalous.
My jailers flanked the creature protectively, the curving blades attached to their gauntlets indicating they meant business.
I stared into a face combining the features of a person and a Cuy guinea pig. Goat's eyes fixed on me, the bottom lip of her low set mouth quivering as she spoke to me in the Warden's tongue.
Although I had familiarized myself with the language during my session with Warden Hupbucu, it hadn't been enough. I shrugged, gesturing that I didn't understand.
Her hairless robin's egg blue face twitched in frustration. Snapping her long opossum tail, she clicked a device on her belt, growled, something, and a human got led into the room.
Slight build, curly hair, narrow face bearing a dull, cow-like expression. The man wore a pet collar around his neck, and an outfit reminding me of a traditional Greek dancer's costume, though owl patterned, and lacking a fez. He attempted communication in two other languages, but I still failed to understand.
One language sounded close to Ss'sik'chtokiwij, but it's like the difference between Spanish and Portuguese.
I told the blonde fellow I didn't understand him, and he replied that "We is going to pack leather say hunting subjectivity place discussion."
What can you really say to that?
Noting my lack of comprehension, the female balled the fingers and thumb of her left glove-like shoe into a fist.
Large buckteeth protruded from her harelip as she made more noises. She pushed a button on the device again, and the Man-Of-War thing once again came in bearing Bishop's head.
She attempted speech again, her furry, mouse-like ears wiggling. Thanks to the android, I finally understood all the weird noises.
"Hello. My name is Mincha Faradmiot, animal rights representative for Abdullam City." Her mousy nose twitched. "I am sorry about your imprisonment, but we are familiar with your species and most of your kind are too dangerous to release into the general population. That being said, I have heard very wonderful things about you. You deserve to have a good `forever home.'"
I guessed this to be a poor translation, based on colloquialisms humans used with animals, but it didn't sit well with me. "I deserve nothing. It is only through the grace of Jesus that I am allowed a place in heaven."
Her response to the machine translation: Complete and utter bewilderment. She uttered soft grunts, her facial expression reminding me of an ordinary guinea pig's reaction to a carrot being dangled in front of their face. "I would like to learn more about this Jesus-heaven, but first we must make arrangements for you, because you cannot stay at the holding cells. I am taking you to Zorbdika for an official ruling on your custody and zoning restrictions (I think he mistranslated) come with me."
"Yes, ma'am."
Back we traveled to the rotunda, the jellyfish thing silently trailing us with the android's head.
"Bishop, are you still in there?"
The machine's tentacles shifted, the head facing me. "Yes and no. I do not have the autonomy I once possessed, except in a very limited capacity. I am mainly a...peripheral to this machine, similar to a computer speaker. On the plus side, I have access to a vast information database. Although I don't have access to all the files, I am continually amazed by the amount of knowledge available to me."
"Glad to know you're happy, at least."
"I am a synthetic human. I have never fully grasped the emotion of happiness."
"I have discussed similar things with other synthetic beings, and they wonder if grasping it would be a blessing or a curse."
"Did they use those precise words?"
"Probably not."
"Interesting...Naturally, the blessing of happiness would come with the curse of its opposite, if I understand the emotion correctly."
"It would appear so."
The human came in close and sniffed me like a dog.
"Don't worry, he's friendly...Very friendly." She unthinkingly straightened the loincloth-like portion of her dress.
"Where will Newt be staying?"
She fidgeted with the tuft of fur on her tail tip. "She will remain in the possession of Bilo Hupbucu until her trial before Zorbdika. She is a cutie, though, isn't she? I've submitted an application for custody myself. I think Vobogi would make an excellent pack leader for her...you'd like to have a daughter, wouldn't you, Vobogi?"
The long faced blonde replied in like tongue. Bishop didn't offer a translation for that, because it hadn't been addressed to me.
"What do you think of Vobogi's outfit? I picked it out myself."
I stared. "Uh...Quite stylish for dance attire."
The female chuckled. "Dance training! What a brilliant suggestion! I simply must find a trainer that can teach him. So adorable."
"I can't help but wonder what he thinks of the matter."
"I wouldn't worry about that. I have him eating out of my hand."
Her hands looked quite smooth and hairless. I suppose it wouldn't be terrible to eat from them.
"Sh'kassk'dwuissueblik, I may need to demonstrate your general harmlessness by touching you at some point. Please do not resist or make any attempt to attack, or it will ruin your chance at freedom."
"May I...reciprocate with my own friendly gestures?"
She uttered an animal growl, her brown-white fur bristling. "Unfortunately, you must remain in restraints until the court has determined you are safe enough to have them removed."
I sighed and nodded. "I am a prisoner for the Lord."
They opened another `pore' security gate, leading me down a stone corridor, again bearing those curious geometric forms of nonhuman construction. The corridors amplified the sounds of our breathing, echoed the sound of Mincha's glove shoes creaking across pavement.
The tunnel branched off here and there to various doors and corridors, but we kept going until we passed through a gate at the end.
Beyond this stood Zorbdika. The Court. Although I'd only seen courts on recordings like Perry Mason, I knew this did not in any way resemble a human court room. The general shape reminded me of old timey operating theaters, but with risers and podiums chiseled out of green stone, with etched symbols that probably meant something if I could read them.
I entered a small arena beneath these tall, intimidating `box seats' facing...The Court.
Entirely dominated by spider faced ostrich creatures, Yautja and rodent humanoids like Mincha, but with different bodily shapes, one morbidly obese. The Yautja on this `jury' did not wear armor or face plates. They still had the thick musculature and dreadlocks, but exposed insect mandibles, lion teeth, and foreheads like Klingons from Star Trek.
The arena featured a...short pillar, with what appeared to be a Chinese checker board in bas relief on the top.
The trial commenced in a very quiet and orderly manner, the majority giving the spider-ostriches with the largest amount of golden neck rings deference. I noticed a bug bird with a single neck ring performing some sort of dictation activity with its feet and a wampum, which glowed as it turned the various beads around under its toes.
The warden made an appearance, but he of course wore no neck ring, so nobody paid him much attention.
Couldn't follow a lot of what they said, on account of the language, but I got the idea that they had some formal preliminary statements, introducing my case and what have you.
I didn't understand a lot of words in their language, but when fingers pointed at me, and they made certain sounds, I knew right away that they described me devouring one of their citizens. I'd definitely heard those particular noises enough.
They used the name Xylena repeatedly in reference to me. For a moment, I got hopeful and thought that maybe someone from LV 426 had survived the nuclear explosion, but then I realized they'd actually said Xylena-Otelera. Having never traveled off planet before, I had no way of knowing how common a name that had been.
The humanoid rodent placed a hand on my head, jabbering something as she petted me. At her prompting, the warden gave some statements, but the jury didn't appear to be swayed.
Mincha muttered to the android head, which ordered, "Open your mouth, and do not bite me."
"That is dangerous," I replied. "My saliva can melt objects and cause burns."
She smiled, patting me on the head while giving another speech to the court. Someone passed her a glove, and she again gave the order to hold my mouth open.
The female performed a modified version of a lion tamer's trick, placing her hand inside my mouth and holding it there, poking the inside of my mouth. The judges and officials gasped. I received another `good boy' pat.
Gasps and murmurs among the court. Several representatives engaged in dialog with Mincha, but I didn't understand a word of it, until they posed me questions directly, and I had Bishop translate for me:
"Why did you eat Risraq and Isirkib?"
Me: "Because I was hungry."
"Do you regularly kill and eat Jipemodi?"
Me: "No, this was the first time. I didn't know it was wrong because I'd never seen one before."
That statement didn't go over well. I got a lot of angry yelling and noise in response, too much for Bishop to handle.
Although the creatures could not create visions or hallucinations, I felt...foreign thoughts and emotions popping into my mind, a lot of outrage and fear that didn't belong to me. I prayed for forgiveness.
I think my penitent pose calmed down the jury somewhat. "What do you eat?"
Me: "You served me some form of meat. That is sufficient. I have fasted before. If necessary, I can again. I rely on the providence of the Lord."
That earned me silent staring.
"You destroyed the statue of our great god Futamer."
Me: "An accident. I crash landed here. Furthermore, why craft a sculpture from stone or some other substance, then worship this thing you know you made yourself?"
I received a growl in response.
"Have you ever produced offspring?"
I nodded. "It was of the species of the Ripley woman, not yours. It grieved me as much as it provided joy. I do not wish to do it again."
"If you are attacked, will you destroy your enemy?"
Me: "No, I forgive."
More alien words got exchanged. A wrinkly Yautja growled several somethings and stood up, pushing his way through the jurors. The others argued with him...repeatedly, but a couple minutes later, he stepped into the arena with me, with a company of armed guards.
He pointed to my jailers, and, to my surprise, they removed my glowing handcuffs.
Not comprehending the situation, I decided it best to remain still and await instructions.
The stranger approached the pedestal, slapping two handfuls of glowing stones onto the board.
He pointed to me, ant mandibles twitching as he growled...something.
I only shrugged.
The Man Of War hovered in with the android's head. "Let's have a demonstration of this `amazing intelligence,' fepowisgi (derogatory term for your species). Win a game against me, and you may go free. I will personally take full responsibility for your free actions, good or bad. Lose, and you shall be my prize pet, for me to do with as I wish."