The morning was warm and muggy as Merlin made his way through the citadel, his pace leisurely and mood pleasant while he walked. Things had been looking up lately for the kingdom. Arthur had been getting a handle on his duties, even securing a treaty between another kingdom after a near war.
He had shown he was willing to do what it took to protect his people and his knights, stopping needless bloodshed while also proving his own abilities as a king. It had been two weeks since Camelot had signed the treaty with Queen Annis, and Arthur had secured three other trade routes and treaties since.
Things had finally started to relax a little, despite the warlock's own troubles regarding an old court sorcerer, and Merlin sauntered cheerily into the king's chambers. He'd fully expected to throw back the curtains and yank a few pillows from beneath the young king's head, but instead he found Arthur awake, dressed, and seated behind his desk with a messenger scroll in front of him.
"Morning!" Merlin chirped, letting the door fall shut behind him as he made his way over to the rumpled bed.
The blankets were gathered together in a lump at the foot of the mattress while two of the pillows were half hidden beneath the framework as if they'd been thrown about in the night.
"Sleep well, I assume?" The warlock asked, straightening the sheets as best he could while Arthur scowled at him.
"Obviously you did."
"And obviously you didn't." Merlin quipped back, half ducking down against the mattress as he prepared for a book to be thrown at him. Instead, Arthur remained quiet, and Merlin stood up with a frown. "Are you alright?" He asked, his fingers absently smoothing out the creases in the blankets while he studied the other man.
"Fine." The blond snapped, looking away as Merlin plopped the pillows back into place.
It was obvious that something was not fine, and the warlock grabbed the laundry basket by the wardrobe before making his way to the other side of the room. As he passed the man's desk, Merlin paused, eyes flitting to the parchment that was the only open scroll on the king's desk.
"Love note from Gwen?" Merlin asked, cracking a smile that quickly fell as Arthur slammed his hand down over the scroll.
"What do you think you're doing?"
"What? I—"
"You can't just read other people's messages, Merlin!" Arthur yelled, standing from his desk as the boy backed a step away and furrowed his brows.
"This is more than not sleeping. What's going on with you, Arthur?"
The two stared at one another for several moments before finally the king's shoulders slumped and he dropped back into his chair with a sigh. "I'm giving you a break."
Blinking, Merlin set the basket down and shook his head. "I must have misheard you. Say that again?"
"I'm giving you time off." Arthur muttered, crumpling the scroll beneath his hand and shoving it into a drawer of his desk.
"No, sorry, still don't understand." Merlin shook his head again, trying to wrap his mind around what he was hearing.
"I'm giving you a few days to yourself, Merlin. Are you hard of hearing suddenly?" Arthur snapped, folding his hands together and glaring up at his servant. "You've been working hard through all my meetings, and you've earned it. So take a few days to yourself and do whatever the hell it is you enjoy doing."
Finally, Merlin laughed. Arthur simply stared as the boy bent over and wheezed through his laughter. "You're funny."
"I'm not joking." Arthur stated, looking both surprised and irritated.
"Why would you give me time off? You never give me time off!"
"I give you time off all the time!" The king scoffed, causing Merlin to stand up straight and roll his eyes.
"Okay, you never give me time off unless I'm sick or injured."
"Are you really going to turn my offer down?" Arthur asked, an all too serious expression clouding his face as Merlin's laughter finally died out.
"Wait, really? You're really not joking?"
"No, I'm not."
Crossing his arms over his chest, Merlin studied his friend for a moment. "Alright.. When do I get the days?"
"Right now."
Merlin's arms fell along with his jaw, a noise of surprise leaving him. "What?"
"Come back at the beginning of next week." Arthur stated, waving his hand as if to dismiss the boy.
Starting to turn away, Merlin stopped suddenly and narrowed his eyes, turning to stare hard at the king. "Why?"
"Didn't I say not to question this?" The blond huffed out a sigh in exasperation.
"Yes, which is exactly why I need to question it!"
"Just go, Merlin!" Arthur yelled, pointing at the door.
"Not until you tell me why! You're acting strange, and frankly benevolence isn't exactly a character trait you possess." Merlin frowned, matching the man's stare as Arthur's ears turned red.
Pushing himself back up, the king's glare hardened, and his voice took on a level of authority the warlock rarely heard. "You will not argue with your king, Merlin. Now go."
"But—"
A soft knock interrupted their argument, and Elyan poked his head into the room a moment later. "Sir Silas has just arrived for you, Sire."
Merlin's head whipped back around to stare at Arthur and found the man with a crease between his brows and his lips set into a firm line. "Go home now, Merlin." The king's voice was softer now, and the warlock blinked as his mind raced.
Silas was back. The same Silas who had turned his body black and blue over the course of just a few days. The same Silas who treated his servants like cattle, beating and belittling them at every chance he got. Suddenly the scroll on Arthur's desk made sense, as did the sudden desire to give the boy a leave from his work.
"No." Merlin said just as softly, and Arthur turned to face him in bewilderment.
"Excuse me?"
"I won't cower from him." Merlin stated, holding Arthur's stare as the king scowled.
" Merlin."
"I'm older and more experienced in my work now. He has no reason to hate me."
"Sorry, what's going on?" Elyan spoke up, glancing between the two of them in confusion.
"Merlin, I'd like this meeting to go well. If Silas sees you who knows how he will react?"
"You can't even be sure he will remember me." Merlin said with his own scowl, his fists tightening at his sides.
"Just take a few days off until Silas leaves so we can avoid any potential trouble, alright?" Arthur sighed, stepping around his desk to follow Elyan.
"Fine." Without looking at either of them, Merlin strode out the opposite door, anger building inside his chest.
"No one takes me seriously." Merlin grumbled, angling the brush across the horse's back as loose hair caught in the bristles.
He hadn't felt like going straight home, not when he'd left earlier in such a good mood, but he'd also had nowhere else to go. So he'd taken refuge in the stables, caring for the mare he usually rode.
"Why does no one believe I can handle myself? I was a child back then, I'm not anymore." The warlock ranted, resting one hand against the horse's neck while he moved the brush along the mare's flank. "It's not like I haven't been taking care of myself and the prat for years now."
Lowering the brush, Merlin's face fell against the mare's neck. The horse leaned into him, nudging his shoulder with her nose, and he carefully brushed a hand against her muzzle.
Merlin could handle himself easily, but he had to admit, remembering how Silas used to hit him made his blood run cold. He'd never regretted stepping in to help the other servants, but those bruises had lingered for weeks.
Closing his eyes, Merlin pictured the rotund man's hand and the glittering rings on his fingers that had cut into his cheek. A shudder ran through the warlock, and he forced his eyes open again.
Since then he'd been through so much, and he'd grown. Just the problems with Ralcade and his magic had made Merlin stronger, even if he hadn't found a solution to that problem yet. He wasn't afraid of Silas, not anymore.
He hated that Arthur had sent him away for the time being, because more than anything Merlin wanted to prove himself. Not to that wretch of a man, but to prove to himself that he was no longer afraid.
Returning the brush to its hook, Merlin heard movement outside the stables and froze, peering around the corner. Outside were three men atop horses, each wearing armor and regarding the stable boys with clear disdain as they hurried to help unload the horses of their belongings.
Silas must have already gotten settled into the citadel, which meant Merlin could get home without being seen. Even though he wanted to show the dignitary that he'd changed in the years that had passed, the warlock also knew better than to cause extra trouble needlessly for Arthur.
Sticking to the walls as much as possible, the boy made his way out of the stables and back into the citadel, moving through the usual hustle and bustle of activity to return to Gaius. As he climbed the stairs to the physician's tower, Merlin paused when the sound of voices filtered through the door.
He didn't recognize the second voice, but the first was definitely Gaius, and his guardian sounded anything but pleased. Pushing open the door, Merlin stepped inside and moved off to the side as the stranger that had been speaking to Gaius turned to regard him as one might a bug in the dirt. He was a tall, thin man with greying hair and a sneer that seemed to be a permanent fixture of his face.
"Ah, Merlin." Gaius said, his voice definitely strained as he gestured to the skeleton of a man in front of him. "This is Sir Silas' advisor, Graylan."
"Hello." Merlin gave a brief nod, hoping it conveyed some semblance of respect he didn't feel.
"Merlin?" Graylan's dark eyes narrowed, and he lifted his chin higher to stare down his nose at the boy. His expression was high and mighty, and Merlin had the urge to copy the face, mocking the man for such a ridiculous pose. "I recall my master speaking of a sniveling servant that once worked in Camelot with that same name."
Gaius' body stiffened behind the advisor, his eyes flashing in anger for his ward while Merlin bit down hard on the tip of his tongue to fight off his immediate retort.
"'Sniveling' is not the word I would use, but to each their own." Merlin grit the words out, unable to force the venom out of his tone as Graylan scowled at him like he would mud on his robes.
"I see you've found different work. I suppose that makes sense, seeing as the King of Camelot would not need your services after such a pathetic display with my master."
Merlin opened his mouth to respond, but before he could get a word out Graylan turned and snatched a purple tinted vial from the physician's hand. "I am certain my master will appreciate the tonic after his long and arduous journey. At no charge, of course."
Graylan turned back to the door without waiting for permission, and Gaius swallowed hard before forcing a tight smile. "Of course. Do give Silas my best regards."
Graylan didn't so much as glance at the warlock again before leaving the tower, and Merlin scowled the second the door was shut.
"Good to know that the rest of Silas' men are as vapid and vile as he is." The boy spat out.
"Merlin." Gaius sighed, dragging a weary hand down his face as the warlock continued.
"Honestly, if he weighs what he did the last time he was here it's no wonder he needs a tonic after traveling. I'm sure his horse needs one more than him; that man probably broke the poor creature's back."
" Merlin." Gaius said again, a warning note to his tone. "Whatever you may think of Silas, he is still a well-known trader and one that was highly regarded when Uther was still in reign. Arthur believes it important to keep this contract, therefor it is best to stay on good terms with them, regardless of our true feelings."
Slumping against the wall, Merlin folded his arms and frowned, glaring at the ground where Graylan had been standing.
"Did Arthur give you time off?"
"Because of Silas, yes. Apparently I'm supposed to stay out of the way and pretend like I don't exist. Just like the man wants." Merlin huffed, pushing off the wall and storming into his room.
After two days of remaining more or less in the physician's chambers, Merlin was bored out of his skull. When Gaius finally came to him with an errand for the knights, the boy was ecstatic. He had a satchel full of medicine for half a dozen knights, and his first stop had been to find Gwaine and enlist him for company.
"I've never met a man quite like him. And I've met a lot of awful people." Gwaine was saying, his hands waving while he spoke.
"I worked for him the last time he was here, at Uther's command." Merlin grimaced, checking the name on the third vial as they rounded a corner near the back of the citadel.
"How did that go?" Gwaine asked, stretching his arms up over his head and yawning.
"Badly. Which is why Arthur sent me away." The warlock scowled, still irritated by his friend's decision.
"It's probably for the best, I—" Gwaine's words were cut short by a string of cursing resounding down the next corridor, and both men stopped in their tracks at the noise.
A few moments later the shouting died down, and hurried footsteps came running in their direction. A young woman with dark red hair hurried past them, tears in her eyes and a mound of bedding in her arms.
As she passed, Merlin caught sight of the dark splotch of red peeking out from beneath her sleeve, and fresh anger surged through him. He hadn't realized they'd walked as far as the guest quarters, but only one man was capable of hurting a woman like that.
"What was that all about?" Gwaine stared after the young woman in bewilderment while Merlin straightened his shoulders.
"You should go check on her, see if she's alright."
"What? Why?"
"Damsel in distress, will you really turn away the chance to be her hero?" Merlin asked, arching a brow as the knight suddenly grinned.
"You have a point, my friend. I'll catch up with you later?"
"Sure." Merlin nodded, readjusting his bag as Gwaine hurried after the maid.
Stalking towards the end of the corridor and rounding the corner, the warlock heard angry muttering and quiet cursing coming from the room at the end of the hall. He was in a different room than the last time he'd come to Camelot, but Merlin would know Silas' anger anywhere.
The door was open as the warlock approached, and he stopped quietly in the doorway to survey the damage. Silas was storming about the room, his face puffy and red. The dignitary was as short and round as ever, with his balding head barely covered by sparse grey hair.
He was wearing gaudy people robes, gold rings on most of his pudgy fingers, and had grey stubble spread across his face and down his throat. A young man around Merlin's age stood idly by the table to one side of the room, dressed in clothing that was barely more than rags, and wearing a choked necklace that reminded Merlin much too strongly of a collar.
The boy's eyes were downcast during Silas' raging, and Merlin took note of the discoloration that peeked out past the edges of the boy's tunic sleeves. He didn't recognize the servant's face, and it dawned on him that Silas must have brought his own servant with him this time around.
"Who are you? Why are you just standing there?" Silas demanded, finally stopping his rampage long enough to notice the warlock.
Did Silas not recognize him? He wouldn't be surprised, really. It had been years, and Silas wasn't the type of man to care about those he deemed beneath him.
"A young woman ran out of here a few moments ago, so I came to see what the problem was."
Silas scowled at his words before gesturing down at his robes which appeared damp around his large midsection. "That foolish girl spilled wine all over me!" Throwing a hand towards the table, Merlin's eyes followed and found a wet spot on the floor next to the chair the man must have been sitting in.
"And that warranted screaming? Over an accident?" Merlin questioned, his voice dry and uncaring.
The young servant across the room jerked his head up then, his eyes wide with fear as he barely shook his head in warning.
"Of course it did! All the worthless servants here are incompetent and useless! Who the hell do you think you are to even question me, boy?" Silas roared, storming forward as Merlin eased his hands behind his back and gripped them tightly together.
"I am King Arthur's personal servant." Merlin said loudly, digging his nails into his wrist in an effort to keep his voice steady and strong.
Silas' eyes went wide, and his mouth fell open in surprise. Suddenly, all Merlin could see was how much the man looked like a fish with his tiny eyes on such a round face. Then, just as quickly as the surprise had appeared, the dignitary's eyes narrowed.
Closing in the last few feet between them, Silas stopped right in front of the warlock. "I remember you." The man muttered, his voice a mix of disgust and awe. "You were that scrawny boy who couldn't even serve a simple meal without making a mess and destroying everything you touched."
"As I remember you, Sir Silas." Merlin met his eye, and for the first time realized how much he stood over him. The warlock was nearly head and shoulders over the man now, and it was obvious how angry that made him.
"You have learned no respect, I see." The man growled, his hands clenched into fists at his sides while Merlin regarded him cooly.
"I respect those that respect me."
Silas let out a laugh, spit flying from his mouth as his face darkened in color. "Your king will hear of your recalcitrance!"
"As he shall hear of the way you're treating his people."
The young man across the room watched on in amazement, his eyes wide and lips barely parted.
Silas shoved his face close to Merlin's with a snarl then, and the warlock nearly gagged at the strong odor of wine on his breath. "Shall I show you this 'respect' you so desire?"
The threat was clear in the man's tone, but Merlin barely blinked. "You rule by fear and ruthlessness in your home. The King however, he rules with a firm but fair hand. Something that you obviously know nothing about."
Silas' hand swung towards him, and Merlin braced himself for the strike. Pain sliced through his cheek, the edge of one of the man's rings catching and tearing through his skin.
Gritting his teeth, Merlin resolved not to show his pain, and instead stared Silas right in the eye. "I do not fear you." He said, watching the dignitary's face begin to turn purple with rage.
"How dare you!" Lifting his other hand, the man struck Merlin across his collarbone, sending a shockwave of pain sparking through his shoulder and neck.
The warlock's body trembled, but still he kept his eyes on Silas. "You are a guest here, may I remind you, Sir Silas. Why do you feel the need to treat those that serve you as nothing more than possessions? They are people, the same as you."
"They are not the same as me!" Silas bellowed, practically frothing at the mouth as he screamed. "They are nothing but cattle to be beaten and tamed into submission!"
Merlin's brows drew together in disgust, his eyes darting over to the young man across the room once again. The servant's mouth had fallen open during their argument, and his eyes were glued to Merlin.
Something about the young man seemed off however, and the warlock realized belatedly that with the servant's mouth open, he could see his tongue. Or rather, where the young man's tongue should have been. All that remained inside his mouth now was a severed lump, and Merlin's stomach churned.
"You don't even allow them to speak back to you." He whispered, unable to hide the horror he felt as the servant snapped his mouth shut and turned away in shame.
"And the same should be done to you!" Silas screamed, his hand slamming into Merlin's other cheek.
The boy barely felt the strike, his body numb from the realization that the dignitary was far more evil than he'd realized before.
"You are a disgusting person." Merlin spoke, his words as sharp as a knife's edge as he returned his focus to the furious man.
He barely saw the next punch coming, realizing too late he needed to move as Silas' fist connected with the corner of his left eye. The warlock stumbled from the blow, landing on one knee in front of the man as his eyelid began to swell.
"How dare you speak to me in such a manner!" Another strike landed to the back of Merlin's head, forcing both knees to hit the ground. "You are nothing, do you hear me? Nothing!" Another blow landed across the boy's chin, knocking his head to the side.
Lifting his head, Merlin forced himself to stare Silas in the eye. No more cowering. No more hiding. He would not give him a reason to claim defense, and he would not give him the satisfaction of seeing his pain. The small act of defiance was enough to send the man into another fit of rage.
"You will not dare to speak to me in such a way! You will not look me in the eye! I am your master, and you belong to me! You serve me!"
"Actually, he serves me." Arthur's voice boomed behind him just as Silas struck Merlin in the nose, causing blood to spurt out and run down his face. "If you lay one more hand on him, you will be removed from my kingdom and thrown into the forest alone for the wolves to fight over, is that understood?" Arthur's voice was cold and hard, and Silas' face had gone slack with shock.
All the while, Merlin still stared at him, waiting to meet his eye again. He would not look away, whether Arthur was present or not.
"I offered you peace and comfort in my home," Arthur snapped, each word spit from his mouth in disgust. "And yet you return that favor by reigning terror on my people, the ones who have served you at my command, and who you treat like waste in a stable."
The king stepped forward, moving around Merlin and standing before Silas. The blond positioned himself partially in front of the warlock, but the boy still did not move, still did not drop his stare.
"Arthur, this is all a misunderstanding." Silas said with a weak laugh, wiping away Merlin's blood from his hand on the back of his robes.
"That is King Arthur to you, Silas. Or do you no longer feel the title is worthy since I am not my father?"
"Well—"
"I may not be the same man he was, but I hold the same power. No further trading will be done with you, never again. Nor will you be welcome in this kingdom."
"You can't threaten me," The man scoffed, though his hands trembled at his sides. "I keep your people well stocked with my wares!"
"No?" Arthur asked, his posture calm and deadly. "I think you do not understand that Camelot is the only reason you're still living like a rich pig. You think I'm unaware of every other bridge you've burned due to your behavior? The only reason Camelot continued to support you is because my father turned a blind eye to your ways due to friendship. However, he is gone now, as is any agreement you had with him."
Silas' face paled, and his hands continued to shake as he worked to straighten out his robes.
"You will leave Camelot by sunrise, and you will not cross our borders again. Neither you, nor any of your men. Is that completely understood, Silas?"
Silas had gone silent, his lips moving like a fish caught on a line, but nothing came out.
"Merlin, let's go." It was only when Arthur turned to look down at him that Merlin pushed himself up to his feet.
Turning to look back at Silas, Merlin met the man's eye one final time. "Silas." He said, all feigned respect had fallen from his tone, and the warlock barely cracked a smile before he followed Arthur out of the room.
As the two of them stepped into the hall, Merlin spotted the maid from before. Her eyes were now dry, and a bandage had been wrapped around her arm. As he walked past, she flashed him a grateful smile.
Arthur kept walking in tense silence, his footsteps loud throughout the corridor as Merlin continued to follow behind him. His adrenaline had vanished, leaving his head throbbing and vision wavering in his good eye.
Finally, after they'd crossed to the other side of the citadel and into an empty hall, Arthur spun around to face the boy.
"This is exactly why I didn't want you going near him!" The blond yelled, his sudden explosion surprising the warlock who stared back at him in shock.
"He made her cry, what was I supposed to do? Let her go back to him?" Merlin's words came out slurred, one side of his lip swollen as well, while dried blood caked around his nose and chin. He had to look like a bloody mess, but Arthur still managed to stare at him like he was idiot.
Finally, the king turned away, his head dropping as he let out a long sigh. "You're lucky she came to find me after what happened, otherwise Silas might have actually killed you."
"I wouldn't have let him." Merlin stated sharply, causing Arthur to look at him with a lifted brow.
"Oh really? Because it didn't seem like you were fighting back at all."
"I was." Merlin lifted his chin. "I didn't give him the pleasure of cowering away from him."
Arthur blinked a couple of time before the man suddenly chuckled. "You're an idiot." The words verged on fondness, and Merlin smiled back despite the pain.
"No, no don't do that." Arthur grimaced, waving a hand in his face. "You look like a nightmare, don't do that."
Merlin dropped his smile but continued to stare at his friend. "Will you really not allow him to come back?"
"I planned to do that anyway, Merlin. I can't stand that man. I've spent the last two days finding replacements for each thing he claimed only he could supply the kingdom." Arthur stated, clapping the boy on the shoulder and causing the warlock to cry out in pain.
Jerking his hand away, the king snatched the side of the boy's tunic and yanked it back, revealing the reddened skin that was already beginning to welt.
"Go home, Merlin." Arthur sighed, dropping the fabric and turning away from his servant.
"I don't regret stepping in." Merlin said, wiping his sleeve across the top of his lip to clear away some of the blood from his nose.
"I know you don't," Arthur murmured, turning to look over his shoulder at him. "But I cannot be there to stop every attack on you."
"Who said I needed you to stop it?" Merlin asked, causing Arthur to snort.
"Like you can take care of yourself. Now go home, let Gaius treat those bruises." Striding down the corridor away from the warlock, Merlin watched the king go until he disappeared down another hall.
"I already did take care of myself." He said quietly, sucking in a short breath and grimacing at the pain in his chest.
Reaching up and touching his tender lip, Merlin winced. "Ow." He muttered, wiping at his lip again before starting for home.
A/N
Throwback to the very first chapter of this story! Since the very beginning I knew I wanted Silas to make a return, and for Merlin to stand up to him in his own way. Not all of us are given the opportunity to stand up to our abusers, but it's so empowering when we finally can. Needless to say, I think this chapter was incredibly therapeutic for me to write, and I hope it was for you to read, too!
I hope you guys enjoyed! Sorry this one took a while, our lives have changed drastically just in the last few weeks with changes in our personal and business life. But we're finally settled into a nice, new routine, so fingers crossed you don't have to wait so long for the next installment!
Just a reminder too, with updates and notifications fixed again for the time being (I hope they're still fixed..) to go back to all your favorite stories and make sure you haven't missed any previous chapters, including Reckless Abandon!