Chapter 8
New Year and Dungeon Dwellers
"Conan-kun, are you spending New Year's with the professor?" Ran sulked when Shinichi brought it up.
"Yes, Hakase invited me over," he said, "Genta-kun, Ayumi-chan, and Mitisihiko-kun would be there too!"
Ran eyed him and sighed. "What am I going to do with the new year mochi…I bought so many," she said before stuffing a few into a container and giving it to him.
"Here, guess you can share some with the children," Ran placed the rest into the fridge. Shinichi felt a little guilty for leaving his childhood friend alone with her father, but…there were more pressing matters.
"Dammit, Shinichi," he heard Ran whisper and paused for a moment.
A while ago, he had used his voice changer and phoned Ran to wish her a Happy New Year. The girl had been excited and had asked if Shinichi would be joining them in celebration, but clearly, it was not going to be possible. Her excitement was wiped clean, and he could hear the hurt in her voice when he told her no.
"Mo, his always busy, stupid Shinichi," Ran turned the stove on. He flinched as she continued. "Every time he does this. It's like, it's like his…" she trailed off, facing Shinichi. Lips quivering, she looked like she was about to cry.
"Ran-nee-chan?" Shinichi asked, and she wiped the tears threatening to fall.
"Maybe I should move on," Ran turned away, and Shinichi was taken aback by the sudden confession.
"Move on?" he questioned. The boiling jealousy he would have felt if she had mentioned this a year ago was gone. This time, Shinichi was more concerned, and he found himself questioning who she was thinking of.
"Yes, I'll find somebody who wouldn't leave me alone on special occasions," she huffed.
"Like Eisuke-nii-chan?" Shinichi speculated.
"Yes! Yes, like Eisuke-nii-chan, you know what," Ran smiles again, "I'll invite him out. Of course, Sonoko too. What am I moping around for!"
"Eh, Ran-nee-chan?"
"What? Are you jealous? We can't all wait for you, Kudou Shinichi!" she snapped.
Shinichi tensed, and he glanced at her wearily. Did she find out? Why was she calling Edogawa Conan…Kudou Shinichi?
The girl paused, realizing her mistake and her face flushed. "Oh, oh no, sorry, Conan-kun, I wasn't talking to you," Ran stammered, and Shinichi breathed a sigh of relief. He glanced at her and made his decision.
"Maybe it's for the best, Ran-nee-chan," he said. Flustered, the girl waved him off, "What are you saying, Conan-kun?"
"You shouldn't have to wait," he continued, this time his voice losing the childish tone. He wanted the best for Ran, but if he had been honest with himself, he also wanted the best for everybody he cared about. The feelings were similar, and they still confused him.
"Conan-kun?"
"That's what Hakase said!" Shinichi grinned widely, reverting to his childish tones, and she considered him carefully.
"Sometimes, Conan-kun," she started after a moment, "You sound like an adult."
"I guess," he muttered, an evil glint in his eyes, "But, if you find somebody else, please remind him—"
She glanced at him quizzically.
"That there are people in your family who deals with murders on a daily basis, and if he were to try anything funny, there are plenty of places to get rid of a body."
Ran folded her arms.
"Conan-kun," she scolded, "Stop hanging out with Otou-san!"
Shinichi flinched when she continued to nag but was relieved when the spark in her eyes returned.
They left the flat together, bidding goodbye to a drunk Kogoro Mouri. Ran meeting up with Sonoko halfway. Eisuke joined them later, and the three teenagers dropped him off at the professor's house. Sonoko handed him some sparklers—a gift to the children.
"So?" Shinichi asked the professor, who pointed to the basement where the problem resided.
"I haven't told her yet. She would have refused," the professor confirmed his suspicions. For the past few weeks, Haibara had been avoiding them. The children noted her absence from school had suggested a meet-up, but she turned them down.
The professor, worried for his adopted daughter, had made a last-ditch attempt to pull her out of her self-made isolation.
"I'll inform her," he reassured the professor, "When are the children coming?"
"In an hour, they've been talking about Ozoni and New Year Soba since yesterday," the old man grinned, and Shinichi chuckled. It looks like Haibara would have her work cut out for her—if he manages to bring her out of her basement.
He knocks on her door and winces when she appears before him. The professor had been right. Haibara was in bad shape. Her hair was in a mess. She looked paler and thinner than usual. There were also bags under her eyes. She scowled when she saw him. It wasn't like he wasn't expecting it, but it still stung.
"What do you want, Kudou."
"Aren't you going to invite me in?"
"No, what do you want?"
"The children are coming over," Shinichi stuffed his foot between the door before she could close it.
"Kudou-kun, I am busy. I have no time for your nonsense," Haibara scowled. "The children can entertain themselves. They do not need a babysitter."
"You dungeon-dwelling goblin," he snapped, "I'm not leaving even if I have to drag you out."
Haibara glared at him, and he remained adamant, stating his argument. "Ayumi-chan has been asking about you, Genta has been stalking your house, and Mitsuhiko asked me to hand this to you."
Shinichi pulled out a small card from his pockets that the children had painstakingly made. It was handmade with childish scribbles all over, and on the cover were the drawings of the detective boys, an Edogawa Conan, and—a Haibara Ai.
"Get well soon. We're waiting for you!"
The message was simple, but—it was enough.
Haibara reads it carefully, her expression softening. She sighs, discarding the lab coat she has been wearing.
"Finally," he commented as she glared at him before stomping his feet.
"Ouch! What was that for?"
"A dungeon-dwelling goblin?" Haibara scoffs, "That's the best insult you can come up with?"
"And what do you suggest? A hermit? A self-isolating monk?"
"Shut up, you bloody meddling protagonist," she snapped, and he gawked at her in disbelief.
"Did you just—"
She cut him off, realizing her mistake; grinning slightly, Shinichi followed closely behind, leaning in.
"And are you the dungeon-dwelling heroine?"
She paused and turned around, giving him a withering glare.
"I'd rather be the demon lord, thank you very much."
And he raised his hands in defeat.
She was…so not cute.
The children came later and were overjoyed when they saw Haibara serving them snacks. Before long, they dragged her toward the grocery store. Shinichi was thoroughly amused as she glowered at him. "Do I have to cook dinner, too?"
She had grumbled to the store but mellowed out when the children told her their meal request.
A small smile appeared on her lips, and he marveled at the effect the children had on her. Haibara had been all spikes and thorns, pushing everybody away, but now here she stood, displaying a gentle warmth she rarely expressed.
"Not too much soba, Kojima-kun," she nagged at the boy who had brought ten packs of new year soba, and he chuckled at the troubled look she displayed when Ayumi brought back twenty packets of Salmon Roe Sushi. She always had a soft spot for the little girl.
"Weren't we making Ozoni soup?" Shinichi decided it was time to help her with the meddling children.
"Ehhhh…but we wanted to eat New Year Soba and Sushi…and so many other things!" They turned to Haibara, who gave him a defeated smile.
"That's what they said, Hakase."
The old man groaned as he procured his wallet from his pockets.
"You've gotten soft," he teased her. It had been a mistake, the girl elbowing him hard. Shinichi doubled over and found the basket she had been carrying shoved into his arms, a smirk on her lips.
"And you've gotten too com-for-ta-ble."
"Come on, let's go get the other ingredients," she instructed the children, who chuckled at his plight, "Before Edogawa-kun mistakes an onion for a potato."
"That was a genuine mistake!"
"Such a great detective."
Shinichi frowned, but when she saw her interacting with the children and spotted the lively spark in her eyes again, did he smile. The girl was back to her usual playful self, and he felt a little relief.
"Shinichi," the professor interrupted, "What should we do after New Year?"
The professor glanced at Haibara, who was now picking up dried dashi for the Ozoni Soup.
"More camping trips and maybe a lot more visits with the detective boys," Shinichi suggested.
"Thank you, Shinichi. I was at my wit's end."
"Don't worry, professor," Shinichi props the basket over his shoulder, "I'll get her out of this."
"Oh," the professor beamed, a teasing glint in his eyes. "What are you planning? Just so you know, I haven't accepted you yet, Shinichi."
"It's not like that!" Shinichi snapped, and the man giggled before walking off to join Genta, who had developed a keen interest in the fresh eels swimming in the store's aquarium.
"Kudou, could you get the carrots," Haibara narrowed her eyes when he reached for the vegetable.
"Are carrots white?"
"I'll have you know carrots used to be white," he retorted. She gave him a look of disbelief, and he continued. "They first appeared in ancient times, their origin found in the country now known as Afghanistan."
"Temple drawings of the root were also found on the walls of Egypt," he continued, and Haibara gave him an irritated glance as he smirked. She folded her arms and cuts in before he could continue.
"Speculations from the experts thought the Egyptian variety to be purple. The carrot we know today was probably brought over from central Asia and used to be white. That was before the fifteen hundreds," she quipped, giving him a stink eye.
"Are we living in the fifteen century, Edogawa-kun?" Haibara mocked, and he snorted in defiance.
"No, but they were often confused with Parsnips," he pointed to the vegetable he was about to take. "Which explains my point."
"Do you need to go back to nursery school, Kudou?"
"Oi."
They continued down the store. Arguing for a bit when Haibara pauses, interrupting their banter.
"What do you want?"
Her voice was softer than usual.
"What do you mean?"
"I asked if you have any meal requests?"
She had turned away from him and was staring intently at the vegetable rack in front of her. Shinichi had failed to keep the grin from spreading across his lips. For a moment, he wanted to pull the girl into his arms. The affection grew rapidly in his chest.
"Chazuke," he answered, "I want to eat your homemade chazuke Haibara."
This time she faced him, as usual, her expression betraying nothing. "You do know what green tea is, don't you?" Haibara smirked. He sulked; the warm feelings he had vanished.
"Of course. Who do you think I am?"
"Sah," Haibara continued, "A great detective who is well-versed in the history of vegetables but can't tell them apart—maybe."
Damm, that evil-eyed yawny brat.
"Hakase," Shiho snapped, "Stop looking for seconds."
The old man was hovering over the rice cooker. A scoop in his hand was halfway in helping himself to another bowl of rice.
"But, Ai-kun…what else am I supposed to eat the sides with?" he protested. Shiho placed hands on her waist, glaring at him sternly. Since his last medical checkup, the doctors had explicitly warned him to take care of his diet. His blood sugars were at an all-time high, and the risk of a heart attack was higher than usual.
"You could just eat the sides," she commented, and he pouted.
"Eh…that would be boring," the professor complained, and she snatched the bowl from his hands, emptying the rice into the cooker, before handing the empty bowl back to him.
"Deal with it."
"Stingy," he gave a defeated look, and walked back to the dining table, nibbling slightly on the edges of his chopsticks like a little child. The children who had borne witness to everything were laughing at him.
"Couldn't you have given him a little leeway? It's the new year's, after all," Shinichi appeared beside her, a slight smirk plastered cheekily on his lips.
"I'm not going to take care of an invalid old man," Shiho commented, her remarks biting, and the boy grimaced. Well, that wasn't the truth. She glanced at the professor. He was still in his fifties, and the number of health problems he had with his weight was slightly concerning. She had made it a point to monitor his health once she found out that he had chest pains every once in a while. The thought of losing the professor to a preventable disease was worrying.
Shinichi frowned, grabbing the rice paddle from her and scooping seconds for himself. "Why can't you be more honest, Haibara."
Shiho gave him an irritated glance. The boy had appeared last minute on her steps and invited himself in with the three children on New Year's Eve, no less. She, who had been working hard on the drug, was suddenly dragged out of the basement to the grocery stores. Of course…she had to cook too. The boys and men, for that matter not proficient in household matters.
"What are you doing here anyway? What about Ran?"
"Come on, aren't you glad I'm here?"
"You interrupted my time alone, dragged the children into the professor's house, and made me the cook and host for the foreseeable evening. I hardly call this a favor, Kudou," Shiho mocked, and he sighed.
"Look..."
And she caught the professor sharing a meaningful glance with him.
These meddling, bothering idiots.
Following the incident in the abandoned cabin, Shiho had locked herself in the basement. Missing multiple school days in the process and making excuses to the children when they requested for her. Shinichi was no exception. He had visited her on a few occasions, but she had shunned him too.
It was for the best. Now, rather than sooner. Something she should have done.
Lies—she told herself so that she wouldn't have to face the truth.
Of smothered emotions, she had long tried to bury.
No.
She couldn't allow it.
T here was no way she would let it manifest.
As the days passed, thoughts of the raven-haired beauty plagued her. Akemi and the girl were so similar that just looking at her hurt. The guilt sinks, burrowing deep into her chest. This pressure—so unbearably heavy that it felt like an elephant was living there. Ran is...and still is waiting for Shinichi. Longingly, desperately. The cause of her heartache, Shiho realized with bitterness, was the accursed creation. Her drug. Her sin.
Shinichi was very important to Ran, and Shiho would do whatever it takes—to reunite them.
She could not hurt the girl anymore.
She had to atone for her actions.
Shiho had seen them before. While riding in the backseat of the Organization's vehicle, she noticed a boy kicking a ball leisurely while walking with a kind-looking girl. They were conversing and laughing. Their carefree smiles stood in stark contrast to the world she was familiar with. For some reason, a lump formed in her throat. It was then followed by a strange, painful sting, one which she could not identify.
And, like always, she pushes it away, ignoring the dull ache of repressed memories. There was no time for such trivialities.
They were strangers; she told herself...nothing else. They would never meet again.
Life, though, had other plans. And in a cruel twist of fate, she finds herself alive and here...with them.
Arriving like a pestilence, barging into their lives, and destroying everything they knew and loved in an instant.
She knew what she was. A problem that needed to be eradicated.
For nights, she festered over the predicament she had brought to Kudou Shinichi.
How could she fix this? How could she bring back the life he lost? There must be something that she could do. Something that she can make right.
The answer came in the form of a temporary antidote. It was the only way to reverse the time lost, restore the peace that had been shattered by her actions, and—to pay them back.
Having made up her mind, Shiho buries herself in work, pushing them away. It was better this way, she told herself. After all, Haibara Ai never existed, and she did not need to be burdened with the fictitious nature of relationships.
Once she was done...
She would leave.
Her resolution, though, proved difficult.
Despite her callous indifference, her biting words, her self-isolation— these idiots kept worming their way back.
And t here was nothing she could do about it.
"Are the new year's rice cakes done?" Genta clapped his hands in excitement as Shiho brandished the tray. She set it down on the table, and before the professor could grab one up, she shoved the smallest one in his face.
"Even rice cakes!" he whined, and she handed him his chopsticks.
"Yes," Shiho confirmed, and he grumbled silently.
"She's doing this for your own good, Hakase," Ayumi chimed in, "Right, Ai-chan?"
The bright, innocent smile of the little girl was infectious, and Shiho couldn't help but agree.
"Can I have the professor's portion?" Genta demanded.
"Genta-kun," Mitsuhiko groaned.
"Eat too much, and you'll become the professor," Shiho warned, and the little boy scowled.
"I'm still a growing boy!"
"Growing too fast," she scolded, and they broke into easy laughter, the professor and Genta sulking.
They played games later, and the old man led them to the roof when the countdown began. Shinichi brings out the sparklers and Shiho a pail of water. Around them, their neighbors emerged from within their homes, waiting for the end of the year. Cold, powdery snow was lining the streets, reflected by the bright white street lamps. Shiho shivered, pulling the thin cardigan she had been wearing closer.
"Haibara-san, the lighter, please!" Mitsuhiko asked politely, and she handed it to him, only to pause when a red scarf was wrapped haphazardly around her neck. Stunned, she could only glance at the culprit. Shiho could barely make out the expression on his face, the darkness of the night masking it from her view.
"What-"
Shinichi cut her off. The countdown had ended, and loud explosions were ringing throughout. Fireworks launched into the black sky, spreading out in a beautiful arrangement of dazzling colors. The children were cheering, wishing a happy new year to their neighbors and each other.
Shiho stood transfixed, the flare of the fireworks illuminating faint glows on Shinichi's sincere smile. Her hands reached for the scarf he had just wrapped around her, and she felt the familiar stinging sensation spreading across her chest. Her cheeks turned slightly warm, and she glanced back to the sky, watching the fireworks silently beside him.
Thank you, Kudou Shinichi.
But this had to end soon. A bitter smile appeared on her lips, and she hid it with his scarf.
You deserve better.
They stayed over, and when he woke, found her missing. The children were still asleep, snoring slightly beside the professor, who was grumbling softly. Shinichi looked at the time and realized it was still five in the morning, too early for anything.
Getting up, he walked towards the basement, half expecting her to be there. But when she wasn't, he ran up the steps towards the second level and then towards the roof. Shinichi found her sitting by the roof's edge, wrapped in a white blanket, staring into the darkness.
He approached her carefully to avoid startling her, but she heard him anyway.
"Can't you leave me alone for at least five minutes?"
"Caught me red-handed," Shinichi sat sheepishly beside her. Still, in his pajamas, he sneezed loudly when an icy breeze blew past. Haibara eyed him pointedly and opened the blanket she had wrapped around her.
"Haibara?"
"Don't make me regret my decision, Kudou," she muttered.
Shinichi edged closer to her as she draped the blanket over his body. Their shoulders touched, and it was warm. Sitting in silence, Haibara was looking at the horizon and the changing skies before them. Shinichi observed her carefully.
"What?" Haibara caught him staring.
She was indeed an enigma. Just when he thought he had figured her out, she always managed to subvert his expectations. "Nothing," Shinichi smiled gently as she frowned. The past weeks have been rough. Without Haibara by his side helping him with the cases, he had been more tired than usual. The detective boys though helpful in certain ways were not equipped to handle the more intricate natures of the murder cases. He often found himself muttering to himself or talking to an imaginary shrunken scientist. Now huddled under the sheets, the longing he had felt for her overwhelmed him once again.
She need not understand, but—
"Haibara," he whispered, "I've missed you."
She snorted after a while. "And why would the great detective miss this dungeon-dwelling goblin?"
"Does the great detective need a reason?" Shinichi answered, and silence ensued. Haibara's gaze was purposely fixed on the horizon.
"Does it matter?" her words barely audible. Facing him, she smirks, "Does it really matter to the great detective?"
Why is it that after all this time, why is it that she thought so little of herself?
"Haibara," Shinichi started.
"Look," she pointed to the sun peeking through the clouds. Orange and red hues broke through the purple-black sky. She stood up abruptly.
"Let me get the children," she said, "It's the first sunrise, after all."
"Haibara," he could not stop her.
She was gone.
And he groaned. He was sick of this.
Sick of their game. Sick of the lies they told.
Sighing in frustration, Shinichi runs a hand through his messy black hair and wrapped the blanket closer to his body.
He'll tell her the truth someday. Shinichi's resolves deepens; once this mess was over—he'll tell her everything.
~ Arc 1 ends~