Chapter 1: past and future
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present: now.
She heard the sliding window open and close behind her, but the view was so beautiful she didn't want to miss it, not even for a second. It wasn't like she needed to look to know who it was anyway: she knew his scent, his aura and the tempo of his footsteps.
He stopped at her side but didn't face the view, his back resting against the rail, his eyes fixed on the floor.Wasn't he always like that though? unable to see the beauty before his eyes? choosing to look over it?
Standing in a nice dress, staring at the sunset, shesighed.
"Will you remember me?" he heard her asking quietly, elbows crossed on the balcony rail.
Inside, the party kept on going with the same old friends that insisted on staying out always too late.
"Aa".
His eyes were closed, head crooked to the side opposite from her. She looked at him: tall, muscular, and handsome as hell. He was wearing a casual white button-up shirt, slightly open at the collarbone. He glanced back at her: red lips and rosy cheeks, too many glasses of champagne it seemed.
And then he remembered.
Legs crossed behind his back, pink hair against his dark sheets, emerald eyes she fought to close every time he thrust into her, impossibly slow and deliberately hard, purposefully looking to hear those sounds from her lips, her moans he couldn't seem to get enough of.
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It'd been one of those Mondays.
Sunday blues got her setting her alarm on her calculator, thus having to rush for her 8 AM shift, not having a second to consider make-up or even a cup of coffee. Fifteen minutes later, there were no taxis on the streets, and her Uber wouldn't connect - and then she wasforty-fiveminutes late and Shizune's scowled at her because Tsunade was hard on punctuality-she was in fucking mood before seeing a single patient.
Lunch came around and she found herself looking forward to spending some time alone to recalibrate. That is until a fellow resident asked to join her, and she smiled politely,of course, I'd love some company. How is your wife? how are the kids doing? Yes, nursery bugs and toddlers, a bad combination, for sure.
Her phone rang, interrupting his rant, "I'm sorry, this will only take a minute" she apologised as she curiously accepted the call. "Naruto, how nice to hear from you right in the middle of my lunch break" she greeted her friend rubbing at her temples, not being able to gather the energy to control her sarcasm.
She heard a sigh on the other side of the line, and then silence.
"Listen Sakura, I'm sorry-", a rustle on the other side of someone standing up and moving around "... and fucking hell, Ishouldn't, I know it's not my place but I think you deserve to know…".
She was put off by the serious tone, she couldn't remember the last time she heard him talk to her like that.
Her colleague looked at her with worry in his eyes.Oh no, something really bad must've happened, those can't be good news.He chewed on and looked attentively at his coworker's shaky form.
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She heard someone knocking at her door.Again.
Go the fuck away.
"Sakura, I know you are in there; I checked that you clocked out earlier today...".
The pinkette sighed. It would be impossible trying to keep Ino away. The medic cursed, got up from her position in front of the TV and made her way to the door to open it with an impatient gesture.
Ino's face crumbled as she took her pale face in, wrinkled clothes; sullen eyes and expressionless face.OhSakura…
Neither of them said anything as Sakura felt slim arms hug her frame. The woman with the pink hair felt a tingle in her eyes and couldn't hold her sobs back because it felt likeher heart was breaking into tiny pieces.
"Honey I'm so sorry…" the blonde whispered.
Please let it be a dream.
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3:43 AM, five months ago.
The night was chilly but the windows were wide open letting the light of the moon shine in, coating the lovers silently as both tried to regain their breaths.
"No one has to know what we do, you know?" she said mostly to herself, but she knew he was listening.
He always did.
His clothes were all over her room; one of his hand ran lazily through her hair while the other rested on her lower back, she could hear his steady heartbeat from her position on top.
Because she knew he had more important things to take care than her -and them-, he had just a little too much baggage to carry and work on. There was no denying he was utterly messed up and he wassolost,and she yearned to help him, to heal him; so much it hurther.
"Sakura…" she could feel the weariness in his raspy voice. It was a familiar sound to her. He flipped them over in a blink; her back was pressed against the soft mattress and he was looking at her likethat again.
She felt soft kisses on her neck, she closed her eyes and listened to the sound of his lips on her skin; his fingers played with her nipple in a slow sensual motion; and she could feel it, she could feel herself getting wet and anxious to be touched and she was losing her resolve so easily … and it at started again:this is getting good now…
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present, 35 minutes ago.
"I would like to make a toast for this bastard right here" Naruto had a way to command a room, as everyone quitted down and turned with smiles to the blonde "You are all looking at the youngest lawyer in his firm to have been promoted to Senior Partner. Naruto raised his glass and looked at his friends with a grin inviting them to follow him. He turned to the dark-haired man, "... and although you got the job all the way across the globe before I did..."
"Deadlast..." Sasuke interrupted, and a chorus of laughter followed.
"...I'm still proud of you 'ttebayo!" the blonde snickered. The entire group cheered after him, toasting glasses. to the Uchiha, even the ever so serious now-promoted-senior-partner couldn't help a smirk as he raised his cup.
The chatter and laughter continued like it hadn't been interrupted. Naruto excused himself from the conversation he'd been in to scan the room in search of a certain missing woman, his quest all but forgotten as soon as his eyes lay onhisgirl.
Hinata smiled at her boyfriends antics, somehow he always managed to make everything a competition between Sasuke and himself.Boys.He joined at her side and hugged her waist. She kept smiling and couldn't stop the blushing, years into a relationship with the Uzumaki, she still couldn't control it. He squeezed her side and looked intently at her glass, the Hyūga rolled her eyes back in response "It's just water Naruto-kun, don't worry". The blonde smiled and kissed her hair. Her blush deepened just a bit.
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She had cried for nearly two days straight after Ino left.
It wasn't as if he had broken up with her, they were not even together to begin with. Regardless, the medic was torn: one side of her was happy andoh so proudof him for achieving so much at such a young age, considering everything he had been through; on the other, she felt exhausted. Her heart was tired of waiting for Sasuke. Waiting for a look, for even just a sign. Ten years was a longlongtime and she felt defeated and used andfucking disposable.
She was twenty-four and had lived half her life with a broken heart,waiting for his childhood friend to look her way- just once, to be acknowledged.
Love couldn't move mountains, she realised, love couldn't take it all; love was a fragile little thing. And she wanted to believe her feelings for Sasuke were deep, and it was raw an they were so strong but-with what propose? She'd never be enough for him.
Sakura applied red lipstick and checked her make-up in the mirror. The amount of concealer she had to use to cover her dark circles didn't look that bad after all, 'Don't worry, I'm just tired, I've been working until very late recently'. Still, her eyes betrayed her; they lacked their usual brightness and spark to them. She felt emotionally drained.
The first night she felt pure and raw anger towards the Uchiha.
Apparently he saw no contradiction in having been fucking he body almost every night for the past six months and then leaving like it meant nothing. Not a a single message; a clue of what he was thinking. She was humiliated by his lack of consideration. It had to be Naruto, picking up after him, the one that delivered the news.
"...Sasuke will be relocated to New York; he's leaving next month. He just called me, it seems he got a promotion and it means he most likely won't be able to come back for at least a couple of years". She was speechless.
"Sakura, I- listen itmight do him some good to get away for a bit, right? but I'm so sorry, I know you guys have been..you know, I'm sorry".
During the second night, she meditated.
In hindsight, she knew it couldn't work between them, it wasn't meant to be from the very beginning.
She had been right to doubt when they started crossing the line a few years back. Every time there was alcohol around, he reciprocated her smiles with a flirty look, an innocent enough touch turned something else out of herwildest dreams. Back then she hoped her love could shape him into what she knew he could be, she hoped and waited and imagined anddreamed.
She should've known better, he wasn't capable of giving anything back. He couldn't do it or wouldn't or- there was just no space for her within his own demons, his own past drowning him.
Not matter how hard she tried to fight it, how hard she tried to push those demons away-his family,to make him see there was a future for him in the past-Itachi. It was frustrating seeing he wouldn't, and she was aware of how selfish it was to ask such courage from him, when he was broken inside.
Just the night before, as she tried to fall asleep, she realised her only way forwards was giving up on loving Uchiha Sasuke. Sakura toyed with the idea as she absentmindedly stoked her pillow. She would try to forgive him for his shortcomings when she was concerned: he never asked for her love, hell even her friendship when they were little. It really wasn't fair to put all the blame on him for it.
She looked at her phone and opened her messages. She scroll down and found his name and their last conversation.
Sasuke: I'll be done at 9, I'll grab food on my way there.
Naruto had insisted she had to attend the farewell party, for both their sakes. Sakura pondered as she held her thumb over the conversation and swiped left.Delete chat with Sasuke Uchiha?
She would go. She would look pretty whilst she bid good bye to the man that had occupied her heart since she could remember.
Nothing lasts forever.
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present: after.
She picked up her heart and smiled; she could only muster the courage for a small one.
Part of her wanted to laugh at her predicament. There was clearly no happy ending for them, except for going their separate ways.
No more wishful thinking from now on. No more looking back.
The sun had set, and the city was cover in a dark grey hue.
Sakura turned to the young Uchiha for the last time. The medic avoided his eyes-too many memories and it hurt; instead, she focused on a point in the grey horizon, just where the sun had been a minute before.
"I'm proud of you Sasuke, I genuinely hope you find what you are looking for, I truly do. Please take care of yourself..."
The pinkette smiled at him one last time,sincerely,as she straightened herself and turned to head back to the party.
It was funny how she'd envisioned this moment: crying and begging him for explanations, for him to stay or take her with him, because she loved him with all her heart and she knew his pain, that was enough,right?- but she felt hollow, plain numbness in her heart.
"Sakura…" his deep and calm voice followed her and she halted in her steps.
Say you will remember me; say you will see me again, even if it's (just pretend, just pretend).
Please.
He paused. The sky had turned pitch black. No stars or moon on sight, only building lights casting shadows against them. Rain was coming.
"Thank you".
Sakura nodded, but she didn't turn to check if he'd seen her. She conceded that, from that moment on, he was not her concern anymore.
say you'll remember me, even if it's in your wildest dreams.
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2023 / we are almost there, the number of ts albums out there since 1989 came out, lol.
As always, don't forget to leave a lil review with thoughts, opinions, etc etc etc etc. bye