"You'll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you," - Silver Springs by Fleetwood Mac

Kathryn had cancelled her evening with Chakotay to "catch up on reading". She was sipping wine in her robe when Seven strode into her cabin unannounced. Kathryn tugged at the shoulders of her robe and tried to slide her wine behind a potted plant.

"Captain, I wish to discuss something with you."

She smiled, brushed her hair out of her eyes and sat, pulling her robe across her thighs. Seven glanced at her outfit, tried not to get distracted, and pressed ahead. She began to pace like she was discussing something very perplexing with the Captain.

"Why do some humans refer to sexual intercourse as 'sex' while others, like yourself, refer to it as 'making love'?"

Kathryn inhaled. She glanced longingly at her wine. "Um."

Seven watched her and waited.

"Some people don't like to discuss sex in graphic terms so they use more polite language."

"So they are the same act? Sex and making love?"

She breathed, thought about the answer, decided she didn't want to elaborate, and eventually nodded.

Seven was annoyed. "Please clarify."

Kathryn pulled at her robe nervously, "Maybe this inquiry would be best put to someone with more ... experience."

"You haven't had sex?" Seven asked incredulously.

She blushed and nodded.

"Have you made love?"

Kathryn's face burned. She looked anywhere but Seven's eyes when she nodded.

"And it was the same act?"

Kathryn breathed. "Would you like to sit and explain why you are asking?"

Seven shook her head and began to pace again. Kathryn finally reached for her wine and resumed sipping it.

"I overheard a conversation between people discussing your private life. One said you were in love with Chakotay, and the other said you were simply engaged in sex."

She put down her wine and licked her lips.

"So?"

Kathryn was frozen. She looked up blankly and waited.

"Are you asking if I'm sleeping with Chakotay?"

Seven tilted her head. "Sleeping? Now you say sleeping. Captain, I am confused. Is it love, sex, or sleeping?"

Kathryn smiled. Was she really confused by language, concepts, or prodding Kathryn about her private life?

She laughed a little. "Darling, they're all euphemisms for the same thing."

"Then why do you make a distinction?" She asked impatiently.

Kathryn shrugged. "Some people do think they're distinct. Others don't. It's a subjective experience."

Seven tilted her head.

"What do some find distinct about the experiences?" she prodded gently.

Kathryn found her wine.

"I suppose some people think that sex has levels of intimacy. There is a less and a more intimate form."

"Are they practiced the same?"

"They are," she replied, then realizing Seven needed more, "but there is a ... personal and impersonal way to experience it."

Seven tilted her head, devouring the meaning of Janeway's words.

"You and Chakotay have an impersonal sexual relationship," she stated.

Janeway scrunched her nose. "Why are you asking?"

Seven began to pace like she was resuming her investigation.

"Because you always say 'making love' when we discuss sex like you find that preferable."

"I'm just," she hated how easily Seven could understand her emotional intricacies, "using gentle language with you because," she breathed, "it's inappropriate for me to really discuss the details of sex with you."

"Why?" she asked pointedly.

"Because it is not an appropriate topic."

"You can have sex with Chakotay but you can't talk about sex with me?"

Kathryn finished her wine and licked her lips. "Do you really think I should treat all crew members the same? Should I sleep with all of you?"

Seven looked in her eyes sharply. "I just wonder why you don't engage with the person you're most attracted to."

Kathryn stared back at her and breathed.

"There are ... rules ... and other factors ... governing my behavior. I thought you knew that."

"If you consent to the fact you would prefer 'making love' with me over 'having sex' with Chakotay, then why do you continue to tell lies and be obstinate?"

Boom. That hit her so hard the shoulder of her robe slid down and she pulled at it self consciously. Seven noticed and stared at her bare shoulder and neck as Janeway fumbled with her outfit.

"I should change."

"Don't," came Seven's command. Kathryn gulped.

"Seven, I," she struggled into speech to evade the heat of the moment. "I ... don't know how to explain. It would change your life completely if we ..." she forced herself to continue, "if you and I did ... have ..." God, she could not even pronounce the words to her. "If we slept together."

Seven smirked. "You must think a lot of your performance."

Kathryn uncrossed and crossed her legs anxiously. Seven glanced at her bare knees and she started again in a rush, "That's funny. No, making love is ... it's different. It changes things."

"I thought you said it was the same," Seven stated with wicked emphasis like she knew she won the conversation.

Kathryn's crooked smile lit the room. "I lied to you."

"Then please do tell the truth," Seven prodded her sweetly as she came to sit next to her. Kathryn ran her hand through her hair and slid away from her.

"Seven, those emotions don't just go away afterward. After the sex. The next day, you still feel the same way about the person. Attached to them, emotionally." She didn't know what she was trying to explain to Seven but she pressed ahead awkwardly. "And it just complicates things. A lot."

Seven glanced at her crossed thighs and asked, "So if you were in love with Tom Paris," she began playfully, "You would not have sex with him. Because it would be too deeply felt. But if you did not love him, then you could engage in casual sex with him."

Kathryn wondered how she got inserted into the story line. Why was it her personal sex life under the microscope? She eventually nodded.

"But if you kept the nature of your true feelings secret, wouldn't you be depriving Tom?"

Kathryn looked at her sadly. "You must think a lot of my performance."

Seven tilted her head. "You don't think Tom would want to know?"

She sighed and looked out the window. "Not if it only made him sad."

Seven breathed, stared at the gorgeous woman, felt herself growing angry with her, and stated.

"Kathryn, you always manage to frame your personal failures as technicalities."

Kathryn winced and sighed. The girl always does bare claws. She knew that from the beginning. She tried not to do any of the dismissals Seven found so incensing.

"What would you like me to say, Seven?"

"The truth," she replied instantly with fiery eyes.

"The truth is ..." she searched her soul for Seven of Nine. "The times I have made love, with those few people," she was forcing the words out like a toddler, "women" she corrected guiltily, "I was completely fixated on them. Body and soul. It may sound ..." she breathed, "positive but it's a very heavy experience. It's intoxicating, in good and bad ways. The attachment felt by both parties is ... messy."

Seven gazed at her pale neck hungrily. She suddenly realized that was what she was feeling. That was the whole reason Kathryn was hedging. It was already happening to them. They were already in love. That's why she barged into Kathryn's cabin at night after overhearing a conversation about she and Chakotay having sex. She had demanded to know if Kathryn loved him and prodded her about their sex life. That was the attachment.

"Then I will have sex with someone else," Seven pouted.

Kathry smirked. "That would be best."

Seven's eyes shot open. "What if I had sex with women?"

Kathryn breathed. "You do seem more sexually attracted to them."

"I'll find an older woman."

Kathryn gulped. "That might suit you."

"You slept with older women."

"I did," she replied. God she would do anything for more wine.

"Why?"

The sex is amazing. She shrugged.

Seven smiled deviously. "I should try with men."

Kathryn's smile melted away. She shrugged again. "Whatever you choose."

"I think I will do a sample of ten men, to see if I like it," she floated carefully.

Kathryn's face drained of color. "That sounds efficient," she mustered in a forced tone.

"But they won't all fit in my alcove, clearly," Seven continued playfully. "May I use your cabin?"

Kathryn laughed. "Very funny."

"Don't be jealous, Kathryn. You can sleep on the couch."

She laughed and danced up to get more wine. She warred with herself for what felt like an eternity about whether to offer Seven a drink. She would offer one to every other person on Voyager, but with Seven ... she always worried about appearances. Clearly Seven had initiated everything that evening, but she dreaded the idea someone would say she 'got Seven drunk in her cabin'.

She brought Seven a glass of wine and laughed when she playfully downed it. "I need to catch up, don't I?"

Kathryn sat and leaned back.

"Is this conversation over yet?"

Seven brazenly took her glass and poured another drink for herself before responding over her shoulder.

"Not until you explain the difference."

"I thought you were going to discover it yourself through experimentation."

Seven sat too close and Kathryn inched away carefully.

"I have been experimenting," she told her quietly. Kathryn's face burned with jealousy, and she let it pass.

"Well, good. I hope you find what you're looking for," she forced out with a small smile.

"I have found..." Seven began softly, "I often think of you."

Kathryn closed her eyes and waited for the rest.

"But I don't ... I don't know what it is I want from you."

Kathryn shrugged. "Sometimes little crushes just come and go. I'm sure it's nothing."

Seven watched her.

"I feel the strangest impulses though. More than sexual, it feels. Carnal, at times. Sometimes," she pulled at her wine, "It feels like I'm mad at you."

"Seven," she heard herself say. She felt like she should stop her.

"Then I want to, in my fantasies, I want to," she raked her eyes down Kathryn's body, "Take you."

"Seven," her voice was barely audible.

"And force you to engage with me. You know. Take you." Seven looked in her watery eyes. "Make you mine."

Kathryn abruptly stood and went to her closet. Seven watched her, staring at her thighs and bare feet as she nervously looked through her clothes for something to wear.

Seven walked to her and ran a hand down her back. "You look beautiful. Don't change."

"I have to. I-" she started in a rush as Seven walked against her and wrapped both arms around her. Seven breathed in her hair and held her wrists.

"Calm down."

Kathryn was breathing so hard. Her heart was beating like she was running. She had no choice then but to let Seven hold her and try to obey.

"Calm down," Seven told her with a kiss to her shoulder.

Minutes passed as they stood just breathing and holding each other.

Finally Kathryn's croaking voice came out. She wanted to lay her head on the taller woman but she held back. She knew Seven was so close to carrying her over to the bed and undressing her.

"If you were to do what you just described, I would never be the same. I know you don't think of me as fragile, but if you ... if you did those things to me ... then I would be so in love with you. And I couldn't continue as the Captain of this ship."

"Why?"

"Because all I would think about is you and being your girlfriend. You said you would take me and make me yours, and that would happen. It's not just that one act, those compartmentalized emotions. Everyone would see. Everyone would know. I would be ... altered. On an emotional level."

Seven ran her hand through Kathryn's hair and pulled it back to look at the woman she still held against her.

"You already are."

"I know but I-" was she even right or was Seven? Should she surrender or not? Kathryn had no idea what was right or wrong anymore. All she could feel was Seven's heart beating against her back. All she could hear was Seven's breathing. Her body still burned from the mental image of Seven taking her. Seven's hot breath on her was unbearable.

"I don't think we should ... destroy each other."

"I won't hurt you," Seven breathed down her neck.

So close. She was holding on the edge by one little fingertip. Seven was one more attempt away from winning.

"I know, baby. I'll hurt you."

Seven froze. She felt the volley coming so she kissed Kathryn's neck.

"Don't say that."

"I will, Seven. I'll push you away. I'll freeze you out. I'll flirt with other people right in front of you."

Seven squeezed her upper arms. "Stop."

"I won't have a choice. I'm the Captain. Not your girlfriend."

"I'll make you my girlfriend," Seven told her with a jolt to her arms.

Kathryn pulled her arms free and stalked away. She felt Seven growing angry and maybe it was for the best but it was awful to hurt her.

"Seven, it's just too complicated between us. Can't you see that?"

Seven stared at her. She breathed. "You're afraid."

Kathryn's eyes lined with tears. "I am. What you are asking about would ruin us both!"

Seven stalked to her and Kathryn was afraid of how beautiful she looked angry. She stared down into the older woman's eyes with burning intensity.

"I thought you were fearless."

Kathryn felt her heart break. She tried to turn and Seven clasped her.

"Seven,"

"Kathryn,"

They would be fighting for years about who kissed who. It was definitely Seven who untied her robe and pushed it off her shoulders, walking her to the bed.

"Kathryn?" Seven asked as she looked down into her swirling eyes.

"Yes?"

"I'm going to make you mine now."

"No," she heard herself try before Seven descended on her. They both knew she was voicing resistance to the emotions she feared, not anything physical Seven might do to her. Seven knew she would have already been rejected and excused if her advances were truly undesired. It's easy to 'consent' when one doesn't know the terms, but when one knows the untamed powers of Love, who in their right mind would consent to the life altering tide of melding one's heart to another's?