Inspired by Frédéric Chopin's "Raindrop" Prelude, Op 28, No. 15
Note: I highly recommend that you listen to the song while reading this chapter for a better experience, but I also respect if you chose not to.
Walking under the rain on a gray, Sunday morning, Sousuke made his way towards the closest convenience store from the hotel he was staying. He watched as teenage girls giggled under their bright, colorful umbrellas, while children squealed and laughed while running and stomping on puddles. He noticed how the glum weather seems to amplify the colors of his surroundings.
The raindrops that formed dancing rivulets on his cheap, plastic umbrella caught his eye. Watching its movement, he was reminded of the time when Makoto would sit by the window and watch the raindrops snake on the glass while wearing nothing but Sousuke's loose button up shirt, boxers, and socks. With a mug of steaming hot chocolate in his hand, he would play a quiet game by tracing the flowing water with his finger with a subtle smile on his face. Sousuke could never understand how someone whose smile was like the sunshine could love such a dreary weather.
It was a precious memory from a time when everything felt right in Sousuke's life, a time when he felt that he was invincible, that he can achieve anything that he wants. It was something that he tucked at the recess of his mind for so long. However, it was back with a vengeance, driving him back to the town that he once abandoned.
He was at the time of his life where he can say that he was already successful. He chose to prove that though he can no longer win medals through swimming, he would still be able to prove his worth by being the best at his chosen field. He had chosen to become a coach instead, and he was able to help others achieve their dream. He was able to gain the respect of his peers and was even featured in a sports magazine. From an outsider's point of view, everything was going well for him.
However, why didn't it feel right? What exactly was he trying to prove? What was he trying to chase after? Why does he keep on pushing himself, only to realize there was still something missing in his life? Why does everything he created for himself felt so hollow?
Realization hit him because of a piece of news Rin accidentally dropped in the middle of his drunken ramblings. His best friend usually avoided even the mention of Makoto's name in his presence. However, on that night, Sousuke casually mentioned that someone at work asked him out and he was considering if he should go. It had been a while since he last dated as he was quite busy with work.
"…well it's a good thing for you to move on, I hope Makoto would do the same. I hate to say it Sousuke, but Makoto deserves better than you," Rin said with a laugh after downing another glass of beer.
Sousuke felt an all familiar ache on his chest. For nights since they parted, memories of a life that once was would find its way into his mind and heart, knocking the air out of his lungs and pushing the unbidden tears from his eyes. Memories of a smile that melts the coldness away from his heart, the warmth of a body that never ceases to comfort him, and a voice that wraps his being with warmth haunts him. The pain in his chest constantly reminded him that it was broken, and it was him who broke it, and that it would never be whole again.
The morning after meeting Rin, Sousuke woke up with his eyes puffy, and his throat dry. He dropped everything in Tokyo and packed his bag, buying tickets for the earliest trip to Iwatobi despite the head-splitting pain of a hangover.
It was stupid. It was selfish. It was desperate.
Who says Makoto was waiting for him? Who says that even if Makoto had forgiven him, he would still accept him? Who can say for sure that Makoto hasn't found someone new?
Sousuke has been in Iwatobi for 3 days now. He went there full of courage, only for it to evade him at the very thought of facing Makoto.
His days there were spent in a cycle. He would get up, eat, take a shower, buy a 6-pack beer and drinks all of it by himself in his hotel room for courage. He would sit on the floor trying to figure out what to do until he was too drunk to do anything but crawl back to bed.
After purchasing another pack of beer from the convenience store, Sousuke took the umbrella from the holder outside, getting ready to leave. Before he could do so, he bumped into someone who was trying to run from the shower. He looked his clothes with irritation, he hates getting his clothes wet. He turned to the culprit, only for his ire to dissipate when he got a better look at the person who was bowing in front of him while blurting out his apology.
He was wearing the jacket that had caused Sousuke to get lost in the mall just so he could buy the perfect birthday present.
The glasses which he loved to push back up when it slips down on his beloved's nose while he reads a book before going to bed.
The soft, brown hair which he loves to run his hands through, and nuzzle his nose to at night.
The green eyes which seemed to shine whenever its gaze lands on him.
The very same eyes that have now met his and has widened in surprise.
"Sousuke…"
Makoto's gentle voice made his heart thrum painfully, and he felt his body go numb. Without him realizing, his hands loosened its grip and umbrella and the plastic bag fell to the ground.
"Sousuke… What are you doing here?" Makoto asked.
The image of Makoto in front of him blurred, and he felt warm tears roll down his cheeks.
"…I'm sorry," were the only coherent words Sousuke could utter, with his thoughts in a jumble and a lump in his throat.
Makoto watched him with his expression a mixture of confusion and sadness, before stepping closer towards him to wipe the tears from Sousuke's cheeks. He picked up the umbrella and the plastic bag from the ground and shook it to remove the mud off. He handed the bag to Sousuke and opened the umbrella, placing his arm around Sousuke. "Let's get out of the rain. We can talk at my place," Makoto said as he gently urged Sousuke to walk.
They walked in silence together, both of them deep in thought. The rain felt like a wall that separated them from the world around them. Under the rain, they felt like it was only the two of them, and that was how everything was supposed to be.
Makoto held him close, and Sousuke relished the warmth it gave him as it was the very one he had yearned for during the times they were apart. Though the words may be different, their minds say the same thing; they both hoped that they could start all over again, under the same rain that brought them together in the first place.
Hello guys! Here I am once more with an angsty one shot, but I don't know if I should call it a one-shot when it has two chapters.
These are not beta'd so I'd appreciate any corrections. Constructive criticisms are also welcome.