Danny awoke some time later to find himself in darkness. He blinked rapidly, eyes adjusting to the dim. Where was he?
Square sets of drawers, a tall round stool by his bed, a metal pole with clear bags attached to it. Something beeping just behind his head… oh, right.
He was in the medical room, in the… Far Frozen? That was what Frostbite called it just before he left, right? Danny's stomach twisted. It felt like that was something he should have remembered.
The boy shifted slightly in the bed, starting to sit. But… he winced, pain throbbing down his limbs. His body hurt, less so than when he'd first woken up, but clearly whatever the yeti chief had given him had started to wear off.
Ugh. And he was still tired. Maybe he could just sleep it off? For a long few minutes, he closed his eyes, trying to drift off.
Eventually, Danny gave up with a sigh. His eyes popped open, narrowed at the ceiling. His body was tired, every inch of him dimly pained, but his brain, of course, was wide awake.
The boy huffed, vaguely annoyed. But… his stomach twisted, the feeling giving way to a familiar unease. Something… was nagging at him. Earlier, there had been something massive he was forgetting. Something more than Vlad almost killing him.
Vlad, the man who kidnapped him, who kept him captive for weeks, who hurt him repeatedly, who tried to take away his memories, his very identity…. That man had tried to kill him. But… that fact was not the thing turning his insides in knots.
Vlad had tried to kill him and now, with the initial shock passed, the knowledge that the man had not succeeded, the half ghost was not surprised. Plasmius claimed to cherish him as a son, coveted his role as mentor. But really, Vlad saw him as a prize to be won, a tool to be used, a toy to be played with. There was no love there. And at the same time…
The older half ghost was quick to anger. He acted rashly, determined to get what he thought he was owed. And… the look of furious panic on Vlad's face as he pressed the button and saw the ectoplasm welling…
The man hadn't meant to almost kill him. The revelation tasted like bile on his tongue. But Vlad had been just as shocked when he started melting. Danny chuckled, sickly amused. Served the fruitloop right. Plus, if he hadn't all but destabilized, he wouldn't have escaped to the Far Frozen.
And now he was safe. The boy let out a breath, wanting to let the surety settle him. Now he was with friends. He was safe, taken care of. He was still alive, still half human. He would recover. His body would heal and he would be able to go home. He would be able to finally see his parents, sister, and friends.
The knowledge should have been comforting. It should warm his heart, ease the burden off his shoulders…. So why did it feel like a block of lead ice lodged in his stomach?
That hazy shape of something un-remembered. The gaping holes in his memory… what was it?
His mind replayed the past in moments. Lying in his too empty room. Vlad's harsh 'training regiments' and evasive answers. Piecing together his memories in the books in the library, the plants in the garden, the picture on Vlad's desk. He'd found the lab and-
His own face, covered in an oxygen mask.
Danny recoiled with the shock. How… how had he forgotten?! His clone! Vlad had cloned him again. He'd discovered that from the man's computer files. He'd remembered Vlad locking him in a box, his wicked grin, electricity forcing him to change. Vlad had cloned him again. And…
Danny had gone back for the boy. That was why he'd been in the lab, why Vlad had caught him. He'd gone back to free his double, to take the other half ghost home with him.
He remembered. His arm around his clone, a confused voice babbling his name, telling the other boy to hide while he confronted Vlad, and…
The older halfa… hadn't been enraged but smug, sickly amused. "I suspected this morning that you had discovered something incriminating but I never suspected this fabrication."
Back in his bed, Danny's insides turned to ice. His own words echoed in his mind. "I'm not stupid! I know what's going on."
And Vlad's hateful reply. "And yet you still think you're real."
Not real…
The idea tickled at his brain, darkly insidious, but… "No. No. That can't…"
"Come now. You must at least suspect by now that something is wrong with your memories."
His memories… the gaps burned, ragged holes in his mind. Vlad had done something… something to him.
"It is unfortunate really. It appears I did too good of a job on you. I managed to embed those obnoxious memories of 'your friends and family' very deeply…"
"No." Danny shook, the feeling of revulsion rippling over him. Violation, his very mind ravaged But… so much worse than that.
"...but failed to erase them completely." Vlad tsked. "There's always next time."
He felt sick. That dark possessiveness, Vlad using him, changing him so casually….
"You still don't understand, stupid boy." No, that wasn't it. Dread wrecked his chest, breathe beginning to quicken. The man hadn't just desecrated his mind. He'd… "Your 'memories' are just copies, belonging to someone else. They are not real."
Deeper, down to his very core, his very self. "You are not real."
"No. That's not.. That's not true." The boy furiously shook his head, his pounding heart in his throat. "That's not true. I'm… I'm real."
Panic bloomed.
Vlad's grip tightening oppressively. Biting back a scream. The crack of his wrist fracturing.
"Please. I..I just want to go home."
"No. No. No." Hands seized his head, balling in his hair.
"You don't have a home" Vlad's wicked smile. "I made you, in this lab."
That… that wasn't true. It couldn't be. But…
"You. Are. A. Clone!" Every word punctuated by a kick to the abdomen.
Clone. The hateful word echoed in his mind.
But… locked in the glass and metal chamber, laying in a puddle of green, his limbs turning to ectoplasm.
"No. I'm… I'm not…" He panted, tears starting to fall. "That's… a dream. A bad dream. I'm… I'm real. I'm me. I'm… I'm…" The name he'd clung to, that was his. Not Daniel, never Daniel. "I'm… I'm Danny."
The image hit like scalding water, like an ectoblast to the head.
Dragging himself forward with one weak freezing at a quiet whine. His head jerked up and eyes met.
"No." The word was the sound of a car crash, of a world consumed in fire.
Eyes, familiar icy blue eyes, held a serious expression. A thousand emotions and… they were so familiar.
Back in the room, the boy cried. Weak limbs curled to his chest, his body shook.
Fear, guilt, pity behind those familiar eyes. Like he knew the color of his own eyes, the creases of his own palm… He knew that expression. He… he knew the boy behind those eyes.
"Vlad was… was right." The man who… who made him was right. "I'm… I'm a..." A clone, he was a clone. He hiccuped, tears blinding his vision. "I'm… I'm not.." His voice couldn't say it: the name that was his, was supposed to be his. "No, I'm… I'm still…" The person he had to be, the only person he could be. "I'm… I'm still Danny."
But… the memories were fake, imperfect copies. They weren't really real.
Vlad's voice yelled in his head. "You've wanted a home and a family so badly you bought your own lie."
The sob choked. His rocking, a futile attempt at self-soothing, froze.
"No… they're real. My… my parents, my friends. Ja… Jazz." A desperate echo of his argument in the lab. "They're… they're real. I… Amity Park. I..I belong with… with them."
"They are real." Vlad's words punctuated his mind. "But they. Are. Not. Yours."
Something in him died.
The boy crumpled, curled on his side. He rocked, arms wrapped around his front, knees pulled to his chest. Darkness deepened, impossibly heavy and oppressive. The outside world dissolved, drowned by this… this crushing feeling.
He whimpered. He babbled. He sobbed. He screamed, everything lost in wordless grief.
He was alone. Totally, terribly alone. He had nothing, no one. He was nothing. He was no one. It was over. Everything was over and…
Alone in that bed, the tears streamed for minutes, hours, years. And for no time at all.
"Shh. Shh. Danny, you are safe…."
The flicker of light, soft and white. Furry white arms reached and enclosed. A rumbling, consoling voice. Lifted so easily, like he weighed nothing, he was pulled to a broad chest.
Just like his dad's.
The thought just made the boy cry harder. His mind filled with neon orange, the memory of strong arms…
"It is alright. You are safe, little one."
Little one… a pet name. Like his Mom's sweeties.
"I…I want my Mom." The words choked out. "I want my Dad."
Except they weren't his parents. Maddie and Jack weren't his mom and dad. He'd never even met them. They'd never held him as a baby. He'd never even been a baby.
"They're… they're gone." He felt it slip, the solidity, the surety. All the memories he'd been clinging to during those lonely nights at Vlad's. Those pillars holding up his identity, his very self crumbled. Those last vestiges of hope….
Jazz's smile. Dad's hugs. Mom's forehead kisses. Tucker's best bros fist bump. Sam's laugh.
"My… my family. My friends, they're…" Real, too real. But never, never his. "They're gone. It's… it's all gone."
The hand stroking his back paused but the boy barely registered.
The Nasty Burger, the park, the arcade, Casper High. "Amity Park…." His voice sobbed, breath short. "I can't go home. I can never… never go ho… home."
He had no home. He'd never had one. Just Vlad's mansion, the tube he'd been grown in.
"My… my family. My home. I don't… I don't have…" He shook, teary face pressed into the furred chest. "It's…all gone. I have no.. nothing. I'm… I'm alone. I'm…"
"You are not." The forcefully certain voice wrenched the boy's awareness back. Finally registering the arms around him, he looked up and tearfully met the yeti's gaze. It was Frostbite, eyes determinedly narrowed, then softening. "You are not alone."
"No, you don't understand." The boy vigorously shook his head. "You don't-"
Danny cut himself off, a huge yeti paw raising to cradle his cheek. "You are not alone. All that I and my people have is yours, not just as your allies." A finger wiped a tear from his cheek.
"I.." The boy's stomach flopped, queasily confused. "What are you.."
"I am sorry, Danny." At the name, his heart throbbed and ached in equal part. The arms around him tightened, drawn back into the hug. "I know my words fall vastly short in comforting you in your loss."
"My… loss." The word came out shaky and numb, confusion curling an icy suspicion.
"To lose one's home, one's loved ones is… heavy beyond belief." A huge paw cradled the back of his head. "Anything I offer is insufficient but offer I do, not as an ally or devotee of the Great One, but as one who cares for you."
His voice locked up. Frostbite thought… he thought his friends and family were dead, Amity Park destroyed.
"Great One?" The yeti questioned, gently pulling back.
"I…" His heart pounded in his ears. "What do you mean?" The question came out quiet and shaky.
The yeti's brow furrowed, mulling over the words. Then… "Perhaps it is too soon, but I care for you so I must offer: the Far Frozen as your home, if you will have it, and we as your people." Frostbite lowered his head, ears back and voice somehow growing even more tender. "I would welcome you into my home, as I would my own cub."
The boy's face paled. The offer should have been comforting but… the horrifying ugly truth hung. Terror. Mouth dry, it stabbed at his heart, the fear of discovery.
"You need not agree just yet." Frostbite must have seen the panic on his face. He smiled gently. "But know that you are not alone. The Far Frozen will always welcome you."
"O… okay." The word stumbled out, more impulse than decision. "I… thank you. I don't know what I'll do but…" He looked down, hands wrung nervously. "I guess I'll stay."
The yeti let out a sigh. It almost sounded relieved. "Yes, good."
Silence fell, a long awkward pause. The boy's stomach churned all the while, guilt and fear flushing his skin.
When Frostbite spoke, the worry was audible in his voice. "Forgive me. In my eagerness to help, I believe I overstepped. You are welcome here, in whatever capacity you wish. And if you wish to speak about your loved ones'-"
"Can I get something to eat?" The boy interrupted.
He… couldn't listen to this, couldn't look Frostbite in the face. Not with….
"Yes. Of course." The yeti stood, as calm and gracious as ever.
"I… sorry." His insides twisted guiltily. "I'm tired. I… I just want to eat something and go back to sleep." His shoulders fell, voice quieting. "Maybe when I wake up, this will all have been a horrible dream." That was the truth, at least.
"There is no need to apologize." A comforting paw on his shoulder. "I will bring food. Another dose of medication is in turn as well, I believe."
With another worried look, the chief left. Before the boy had any time to begin panicking again, he returned with a plate. A simple bowl of soup and sandwich laid out in front of him, a cup of various pills to the side.
The half ghost ate quietly, while Frostbite explained the medications he and the other doctor's prescribed and their various uses. It was better than the silence of his own thoughts at least.
A few bites in, the boy pushed the food away. "I'm not hungry anymore."
Again, wide concerned eyes fixed on him. "Is it not to your liking? I can bring different foodstuffs."
"No. It's… it's fine. I'm just…" An arm wrapped around his stomach, head fixed down. "Please. Just let me sleep."
For a moment, Frostbite looked like he would argue. Then, shoulders falling, he stood. "Very well. A nurse will return in a few hours to check on you." He motioned to a button on the arm of his bed. "Press this to call the nurses for assistance. Do not hesitate should you need anything."
With one last sad look, the chief left. And the clone boy was alone.
The half ghost did not sleep. His stomach churned queasily, a dozen emotions raging.
Frostbite's soft, worried eyes. Sturdy arms embracing him. The yeti's words rang in his head. I would welcome you into my home, as I would my own cub. And the boy felt sick.
The offer… it was based on false assumption, a double lie. His friends and family weren't gone. His home was not destroyed. They were never his in the first place. And that was even worse.
His core throbbed painfully. He wasn't Frostbite's 'Great One.' He had no idea what the title even meant. He'd never been here before. He knew nothing of their history, how this allyship started, how the yeti chief could come to care for him…. for the real Danny so much.
He winced, icy guilt plunging through his insides. He should tell Frostbite right now. It would be easy, just press the button to call the nurse and ask for the chief. He should call him and tell him the truth, but….
His body trembled, a stab of fear. Tell him what? He… he wasn't really Danny. He was a fake. An imposter.
He imagined it. The betrayal on Frostbite's face, the distrust. It hurt. His heart twisted painfully at the thought. But he'd lied. He'd lied from the start. Everything about him was a lie. He would deserve that anger, that mistrust, wouldn't he? He was nothing, just… a clone with fake memories.
His throat felt thick, tears welling. A clone with nothing. This felt worse than the thought of his family and friends just being dead. Then, there would be a life to mourn but…
He shivered with revulsion. None of it was even real. The wisps of memory, the dreams, the emotions, they weren't his. But….
They felt real. The sob bubbled up and he covered his mouth. The first uncovered memory came unbidden to his mind.
Bright light, blue-green ocean, white sand. Someone, no, two people are holding his hands. He looks up. The man in orange is on his left and he's laughing. The woman with the red-brown hair is on his right. She smiles. The two are gently swinging the boy, as they walk towards the water.
The first day he'd woken up, he'd seen the picture of Vlad and the man and woman in his captor's office, and… the memory bloomed. Distant and fuzzy, but real, so real.
And that night after, writing his thoughts on his bed, putting together the pieces. Another memory had arisen: getting ready for the school dance, the woman fixing his tie, the man proudly patting him on the back.
He'd seen himself in the couples' faces. The man's blue eyes and black hair, the woman's slender build. And his eyes had watered with joy. Those were his parents.
That joy was real. Those feelings every unearthed clue brought. Excitement playing video games with Sam and Tucker. Sweet comfort as Jazz held his hand and whispered his name. Even the terror of the portal accident. Everything he felt was real.
And… didn't that count for something?
Shakily, he brought his palm up to his face, staring at the familiar lines. His twice new hands. Everything was new, made first in Vlad's lab some months ago, and then remade in the nebula. But wasn't it his mind that mattered?
If he remembered loving his parents, sister, and friends. If he missed them right now… wasn't that real enough?
Maybe… it wasn't over yet. The boy lifted his head, daring to hope.
If he looked at his human face, he'd still have his father's eyes. Jack and Maddie's blood still ran through his veins. He was still their son, still Jazz's brother.
He could still recover and find his way to Amity Park. His heart ached, wide misty eyes far away. And he could see it. Standing at the front door of Fentonworks, a tentative knock. The door would open and Maddie Fenton's face would peer through, her brow at first wrinkled in confusion.
Then… her eyes would widen, surprised, overjoyed. The boy imagined her embrace, calling for Jack and Jazz. Exclaims of relief. His friends would hurry over, joining the hug. He'd… he'd finally be home.
And then what? His hope crashed, reality again hitting.
What would he do then? Throw himself at the real Danny's mercy and… beg that he tell their parents his secret? His stomach turned at the idea. He himself had decided to do that while at Vlad's, to go home and tell his parents all of his secrets, including about his "clone". But would his counterpart? What if he refused to tell?
And what if he did tell them? The clone's nose wrinkled, a dark bitterness pricking his heart. Sharing his family, his friends with someone who had his face. Who talked like him, thought like him, acted like him.
Sharing his room, or being relegated to the guest room. The image had his stomach in knots, sick with envy. Someone else wearing his clothes, reading his books, sleeping in his bed. All the while he slept in another impersonal, empty room. Out of place, a stranger in his own house.
What else was he supposed to do? The anger roiled, nails driven into his were two of them now, another Danny in his home with his family. And the boy simply did not measure up. He barely knew what powers he had, let alone how to use them. Meanwhile, his counterpart had fought Vlad to a standstill at least.
He remembered the crashing of metal crumpling, the shatter of glass, arctic cold. All while he wept on the floor, his body literally falling apart. The jealousy rose, a sour taste on his tongue. Why couldn't that have been him? He'd lived in fear for weeks, walking on eggshells and terrified of sending Vlad into a rage. In an actual fight, he'd had no chance. But his counterpart had beaten the man so easily.
None of this was fair! His muscles tensed, shaking. This was not how things were supposed to go! He was supposed to go home and reunite with his friends and family. He'd tell his parents about Phantom and they'd stop hunting him. Maybe they'd even help with all the ghosts. His friends and sister would help him with the amnesia, with the gaps in his memory. He would heal and Vlad's mansion would grow into a distant nightmare.
But he'd gone down to the stupid lab. He'd found the chamber, found his counterpart, and just had to be selfless. He'd risked his safety, his chance to escape going back for the other boy. And for what?
He… he should have just left him there. The thought lashed out, dark and hissing. He should have just driven away, just worried about himself. If he'd just left well enough alone, if he'd just taken his chance, then… then he'd be at home now. He'd have his friends and family, his home.
His insides wouldn't feel like they were shaking apart, the awful truth eating him from the inside. He wouldn't be alone, with nothing. He wouldn't have to fight for His family, His home.
"It's not fair." The rage built, darkly possessive. And he lashed out with a fist.
It impacted the side of the bed with a sickening crack. The sidebar crumpled. It fell off the bed, crashing onto the floor.
The boy froze, icy horror evaporating his anger. A shaking hand raised, sparks dancing between the digits. He forced the electricity to dissipate, his breath to slow. When had he started panting?
Trembling hands planted in his lap. What was…. What was that? Disgust roiled in his gut. What was he thinking? Wishing he'd left the real Danny behind, that he needed to fight him for his place in Amity Park? The boy shook his head, as if he could wipe the thoughts away. That was… was some evil clone thinking. And he might be a clone…was a clone but… but he wasn't going to be an evil one.
The boy breathed. In. Out. No, no, he couldn't go home for now but… maybe he could figure something else out, once he'd had some time to deal with everything. Despite the dark thoughts… his home sickness still felt real. He still wanted Amity Park as his home, Jack and Maddie as his parents. Maybe they could figure out a place for him. But for now…
His eyes flitted to the door, ears twitching for sound. No rumbling yeti voices, no rush of pounding feet. His gaze swiveled to the broken side-bar and he winced. It was a miracle no one had come running yet.
That was better at least. He didn't want to talk to anyone, didn't want to explain why he'd been angry enough to… to…
He sighed. He would have to explain it at some point though. And… he winced, stomach twisting guiltily. Frostbite still thought his loved ones were dead. The yeti would want him to talk about what happened. If his story had been the truth, talking through his pain would have been the wisest choice. But his real secret….
The boy swallowed, biting at his lip. He had pretended to be the real Danny. Anxiety twisted his insides. Fear of rejection, a bitter clawing desperation. No, not the real Danny. The… the other Danny.
His emotions were real, even if the memories weren't. He was still Jack and Maddie's son. He wouldn't… he couldn't give up everything he'd fought for, everything he'd learned, his very identity.
His… his name could still be Danny. People had the same name all the time. He could still be Danny. He… he was still Danny, just…. a different one than Frostbite thought.
And that was it. Danny leaned back in his bed, eyes drifting to the ceiling. He was still Danny, even if… different now. Still, water misted in his eyes, even as his lips pressed closed. The secret buried deeper and deeper, digging into his heart.
He was still Danny. He had to be.