Chapter 7

"What are you doing here? How did you even find me?" Rory blurted, unsure why considering there were more pressing matters due a discussion.

They were standing there on the dark street on a chilly January evening. Everything had suddenly begun to feel a lot sharper - every gust of wind, every sound. Rory was still tired, but her mind had been distracted from it.

"I wanted to see you in person. And - Lane," Logan replied briefly.

Lane wasn't indeed too hard to find online, and Rory actually wasn't mad at her for this. It was certainly better than having Logan show up at her mom's or worse at Luke's. But certainly - he could've just asked her directly. A heads up would've been nice.

"Okay, well… you better come up then," Rory said, beginning the task of getting the key into the keyhole for the second time. Now it was the nervousness that was making this simple task hard for her.

"This lock takes some getting used to," Rory added, apologetically, and found herself avoiding eye contact. She felt like it was for Logan's sake they ought to get out of the street quickly, but at the same time she could just feel his eyes studying her. There weren't many people around this late in this town, but still - there was a chance someone would put two and two together and start some rumors.

Rory could also sense Logan holding his tongue, knowing he probably would've gladly offered her some alternative housing like so many others already had. The slightly stale scent in the hallway alone must've created an impulse of avoidance in him, being used to so much nicer places.

They took the stairs to the second-floor walk-up. It really wasn't that bad, considering Rory had thought already that she had a spot where the stroller could be stored on the first floor once it was needed. Besides, she'd already started noticing people wearing all sorts of cool baby carriers, making her think that maybe she could skip using a stroller that much altogether.

It wasn't until she opened the apartment door that she truly felt embarrassed, however, having left the place a real mess before leaving to meet Tristan. There were clothes everywhere, take-away containers, and plenty of unpacked boxes everywhere. This was the first time Logan had set foot on anything that could be called 'her turf' since college, not counting a couple of hotel rooms that she had inhabited.

"Sorry for the mess," Rory said, feeling surprisingly vulnerable.

"Hey, I'm not here to grade you on your tidiness," Logan said, shrugging his shoulders, trying to get Rory to relax a little, and held up his hands to indicate he was taking things lightly.

"Still. I didn't exactly expect to see you. Tonight especially," she replied, making a frustrated face and gesturing around herself. She nearly wanted to say it was inconvenient that he'd picked this particular night - but she felt she couldn't really be mad at him. She began to pick up a few odd times, clearing the coffee table and sofa at least.

"I didn't know when I'd be able to get away, or I would've let you know. We were in the City…," Logan explained.

"I wondered when I'd hear from you," Rory commented, adding - "If at all…"

"Come on, Rory. There was never any 'if'," Logan replied, feeling a tad offended. But from the look on Rory's face - disbelief and something else mixed in - he felt he needed to pull back on the seriousness. "I had… I have… a lot going on and it was a lot to wrap my head around. It just took me some time… I thought about calling but then I didn't really know what to say… I am not sure I know now. But I'm here. For tonight at least - and I guess I just wanted to see and hear how you're doing and if there's any way I can help," Logan continued to elaborate.

"That's understandable. And for what it's worth - we're both doing fine," Rory said, shedding off her cardigan, suddenly feeling very hot, almost suffocatingly so.

"You've had ultrasounds? Tests?" Logan inquired, and Rory nodded in response, affirmatively.

"You've got some kind of insurance, I assume?" Logan asked, more practically.

"Are you forgetting my grandfather was in the insurance business? Of course, I have insurance," Rory shot back. While otherwise not doing great personally - insurance policies, all kinds, were always the one thing her family had been very specific about, being known to read even the fine print.

"I just wanted to make sure," Logan assured.

"I don't need taking care of, Logan. I meant it when I said that I didn't need anything," Rory said. "It's not your job to take care of me…," she added.

"I can't help but to feel like I'm a little responsible here," Logan said.

Rory exhaled and frustratedly shredded another layer of her clothes, a flowy blouse, leaving her standing there in just a tank top and leggings, finally feeling like she was able to get some air.

"Seeing it really makes it real, doesn't it?" Logan commented, having to swallow hard, as he caught the first look at Rory in profile. The bump was small, but it was definitely there.

Rory hadn't even realized how she'd little by little exposed herself like that - it hadn't been her conscious intention.

"It's just at this odd size right now. My old clothes don't fit, and everything from the maternity section is just too much," Rory described.

"It suits you," Logan chimed, a little too dreamily perhaps, causing Rory to gently blush.

"Thanks," Rory replied, humbly. "It's weird, you know. Having something grow inside of you… I've grown so protective of her already. I'm even eating more vegetables," Rory added.

"Well if you're eating your greens and all...," Logan teased, smiling at her in his most charming way.

"Ha-ha," Rory shot back. Secretly she found herself both hoping and dreading that the child would have his smile.

"Can you, um… feel it move?" Logan asked, still maintaining a polite distance between them.

"I'm not sure, you know… there's been something. Lane said it could be fluttering, but I'm not quite sure if it's that...," Rory shared honestly, gently running her hand over her tiny bump.

"Can you let me know when…," Logan began, pausing because he really didn't know what he had the right to ask. Not even legally so, but morally.

"So, you want contact?" Rory reflected, hearing him pause for a moment.

"Ideally, some… yes," Logan replied, but couldn't shake sounding skeptical. "I am not sure how good of an idea it is or how that's going to work, but if I am being honest then that's what I want, yes," he added, trying to convince himself that this could somehow happen.

"Oh?" Rory reacted, having not even dared to think of a scenario like this.

"I assume that's alright?" Logan asked.

"I…I… I don't know," Rory replied, trying to understand this. "How…? Does she…?" she blurted, searching for words.

"Does she what?" Logan reflected, it taking him a minute to understand who Rory was talking about. "Does Odette know?" he guessed.

"Yes!" Rory replied. She didn't like talking about her.

"Well, she doesn't yet. But I'm going to have to tell her. I'll have to, won't I?" Logan replied.

Rory felt terrified, unsure of what reaction to expect from Logan's wife. Surely it wouldn't be accepted with open arms. She didn't dare to ask what that would mean, however – would she still stay with him despite this?

"You don't look like that's the outcome you wanted to hear," Logan commented, after studying her.

"I'm just surprised. Confused? I don't know what to expect. I just didn't picture you'd actually want to be involved…," Rory tried to explain the plethora of scenarios going through her mind.

"I mean, I want to know her. But, at least for now, I don't know how much time I'll be able to spend Stateside… so I'm not sure if 'involved' is the right word, but I want to hear, see… how she's doing, maybe have some say in some of the decisions. Schools, stuff like that. And I know you're going to say you don't need anything, but I do want to financially contribute. Trust fund. College fund, you name it. If not through you then she'll get it when she's older," Logan listed.

"For some reason I just keep thinking what your parents will say…" Rory said after listening to him speak. For some reason she still felt like she was just 20 years old and seated at that dinner table at the Huntzberger's house, being talked about in the most awful way, whenever she thought of them.

"I mean they won't need to know. Not right away at least. And once they do… they'll just have to deal. It's not like this is unheard of," Logan added.

"Okay, wow… So, you're serious?" Rory exclaimed.

"Yes! That's what I've been saying!" Logan replied.

"Okay, wow… okay," Rory continued to repeat, needing to take a seat, still struggling to wrap her brain around this.

Logan just watched her, almost as if watching the gears turn in her head right there in front of him.

"Is that okay?" Logan asked.

"Um… yeah, I mean, of course. Just because I hadn't seriously considered it, doesn't mean it isn't okay. I mean, she's yours too. It's odd though - I've grown used to thinking of her as mine and only mine. But you have rights, unless you for some reason don't want them. But as I've just understood that you do. So, yes," Rory continued to blabber.

"You're not in this alone, Rory," Logan assured, stepping closer to her.

Rory hadn't realized how much she'd needed to hear someone say those words. Someone other than her mother - that is. But she swallowed those tears that formed in her throat, only sniffling a little. She was terrified of falling apart in front of Logan - it had always been the one thing in their most recent relationship that she'd struggled to do around him, always putting up a strong front. She'd always felt he got her regardless of what she showed, but it was, in part, the pretense of 'happy go lucky' that had kept her sane. The trouble was - each time she came close to falling apart, or admitting to feeling anything significant to herself - it had only taken a small step for them to fall back into bed together, even an innocent touch taking on a much stronger meaning. Hence, she didn't want him to offer to comfort her now. She couldn't let that happen again – she couldn't do this again.

"Okay," Rory exhaled deeply.

"You got any ultrasound photos…?" Logan asked, hopefully.