Feel Like Shooting
"Have you heard from Sam? How's he doing?"
It had been two months since Sam had left, a week or so over two months since Dean had gone to hell. Jane had remained on with Bobby and together they had started taking up hunting again. He grumbled about it under his breath a lot, but he would reluctantly admit that she was handy in a pinch. With nothing to really worry over anymore, she had tossed herself into the world she was never supposed to know about.
They were home, taking a well-deserved rest after their latest 'escapade', and she had just come downstairs from a shower. She swore up and down she still had guts in her hair. "How'd you know he called?"
"He sure as hell don't call me but you… I figured he might check in."
She smiled slightly, finishing up with her braid. "He did, while we were gone. Left a message."
"How's he sound?"
"Pretty drunk actually."
Shaking his head, Bobby headed for his 'reading' room.
"Sammy, what are you doing?"
"Don't call me Sammy, Janey."
"Sammy, where are you?"
"Aww, does Jane want to come keep me company?" Sam chuckled, lowering his voice to a husky pitch. "Need to play house with the other Winchester?"
"You realize, eventually, we will see each other again and I will knock your teeth down your damn throat." She said through gritted teeth. "How much have you drank today Sam? I can practically smell it through the phone."
"Harsh mom."
"Sam…"
He was quiet for a long moment before rattling off an address. "Better hurry because I won't wait for you."
She had hung up.
Jane had seen some of the places the brothers had liked to stay when working a case and they weren't all motels… sometimes they were abandoned houses, or apartments. Kinda like the place Sam was currently using as his base of operations. Not the nicest, but… she had seen worse.
Gun out, she tested the door, just in case. Unlocked. Either Sam was getting sloppy, being purposefully stupid, or he wasn't here. "Sam?" She called, pushing the door open.
"Mrs. Winchester…"
It was pitch black and Jane wasn't going to lie, she felt a shiver of something similar to fear snaking through her. This was not the Sam she knew. Rationally, she knew grief coupled with alcohol had a way of changing people, especially when there were copious amounts of guilt and serious stress involved. Dean had always whispered that Sam had a dark side, she had seen glimpses of it throughout the time she had known him, and this was definitely dark.
"Sam, where are you?"
"Right here."
She found her gun being taken from her by a hand much larger than hers. "Damn it Sam!"
"Safety off and everything Jane, were you going to shoot me?"
"God you reek again…" She felt him nearby and reach out, trying to push him away but that was like trying to push at a wall. "Personal space."
He backed off.
A second later, light flooded the… room and she blinked, taking a moment to visually adjust. "Shower Sam, before anything else, please take a shower." She didn't want to know what he was caked in but he stank and he needed another shave. And a breath mint… and coffee.
He shrugged and skulked away.
When Sam emerged, he was clean and fresh shaven and looking relatively sober. Jane had made a quick run down to the gas station and picked them both up some coffee –and some food. Nachos and hotdogs, quickie stuff you could pick up at any Speedway, but it was better than nothing. She had cleared off what looked like it could be a table and laid out the nutritionally questionable meal and was waiting patiently.
He eyeballed her and her offerings, letting out a sigh. "I'm a dick." He announced, raking his fingers through his wet hair.
"Yes, you are. Put on a shirt." She ordered flatly, sipping at her coffee as she surveyed him. Jeans, socks, and nothing else. Not that Sam wasn't good to look at, because he was, very much so. She just didn't want to look at Dean's brother. Looking felt wrong.
He didn't say a word, just went to do as told. When he came back from what she was assuming was his room, he was buttoning up his shirt. Didn't he own a plain t-shirt? She watched as he sat down and pushed the other cup of coffee towards him.
Sam eyeballed the cup before taking it, inhaling the bitter aroma. "Thanks."
She nodded, next pushing over the food. She had already eaten and even if she hadn't, she doubted she could eat right now. "Working?"
"Yeah."
"How's it going?"
"Good."
"Sam…"
"Jane, don't." He stared down at the food, feeling a wave of repulsion going through him. This was Dean's type of chow, not his, even when he wasn't making alcohol his main dietary supplement. "I know I'm messing up big time, we don't need to talk about-"
"Yes we do Sam." Jane was proud of herself for keeping her voice so calm and steady. "You won't return Bobby's calls but you call me at least once a week. Sometimes you're so drunk I'm surprised you can even tell it's me you're calling and other times…" She trailed off, shaking her head.
He pushed away the food, not up to pretending he had an appetite. "Did you really come all this way just to play mom?"
Jane felt like shooting him, and would, if he hadn't taken her gun with him. "I came because I'm worried about you, nitwit."
"Well, I'm fine, thanks. Stop worrying, Jane."
"Obviously, Sam, you're not fine."
"My brother is dead, excuse me while I bother to feel bad about it while you move on."
"Where's my gun? I'm going to shoot you in the face, Winchester." Jane pushed herself away from the rickety table, intent on retrieving said gun and shooting him.
Sam stood up as well. He needed a drink.
"I've seen Ruby."
It was the first they had spoken since Jane had threatened to blow his face in hours earlier. It was now night time and Sam had retreated to an old, sagging in the seat, musty and possibly mildew, recliner. Jane had claimed his bed and he hadn't been in the mood to put up a fight, though before he gave her back her gun, he had emptied it. He wasn't risking her losing her shit and firing a few rounds his way.
Jane had slept for a few hours, woken up long enough to creep to the bathroom, and then crawled back under the covers. Sam assumed she was still awake because she hadn't fallen back into the deep breathing rhythm he had come to associate with her resting peacefully.
Now she was sitting up, drawing her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them as she stared at him through the darkness. "Demon chick? Got K. by Lilith?"
"Yeah. She got herself a new body. Or did. I sent her away." Sam didn't hear her say anything so he sighed and continued. "She was riding someone, Jane… I couldn't deal with it."
"Fair enough."
"She saved me."
"Oh?"
"Turned on some other demons to save me. She says she's a fugitive now."
"What do you think?"
"Honestly? I don't know what to think, Jane." He leaned back in the chair, moving his head when a spring prodded at his skull. "I don't know what to think about anything anymore. I just want him back, you know?"
Boy did she know. Every day was like waking up to find a fresh hole in her chest, a hole that was lined with jagged shards of broken glass, and it didn't get better. She put on her happy face, went hunting with Bobby, and cooked for them when they were home, but she was just going through the motions. It was ridiculous, hurting this bad over someone that should have never been in her life to begin with. To hurt over someone who had brought nothing but trouble to her. But she hurt.
God, did she hurt.
A/N: So, Sam is back and forth on the moods -we all know he gets over it. I was talking to a friend about a possible scenario between Sam and Jane that would have repercussions down the road, a lot of repercussions and drama -I love drama from time to time. Anyways, you'll get the idea from the options:
1. Nothing. Sam and Jane do absolutely nothing. -No future impact.
2. Sorta something. A little something occurs between Sam and Jane. -Slight future impact.
3. Major something. Sam and Jane have themselves a night they should forget and pretend never happen. -Serious shit storm ahead.
Feel free to leave a number in a review, or a PM, or feel free to tell me how monumentally bad of Jane that would be. Regardless, next chapter features the return of Dean.
