A/N: So, option A it is. Jane and Dean will get their brief apple pie, normal (sort of) life. I apologize for the delay in chapters, life is busy. I'm already thinking up ideas for their little break after season five, before season six. Anything in particular anyone would like to see?

And because I was PM'd about the possibility of a mini-Jane/Dean running around: given the events of Supernatural, Jane and Dean having a baby seems pretty unrealistic and downright irresponsible. Yeah, during that 'break' coming up, the idea of it can be tossed around, but working a baby into the mix gets a bit messy. For now, babies for Dean and Jane are a no-go. Sorry.

Set during 5.14: My Bloody Valentine.


88: Giving Up

"Boss says we can't kill you."

Sam stared up at the female demon, his eyes raking over her hungrily.

"But I bet we can break off a few pieces."

"And we can definitely have the wife." The male added, glancing towards the bathtub.

Sam looked back at Jane, frowning. She was unconscious, a smear of blood on the tile wall where her head had struck it. He couldn't worry about her now, he had to worry about getting undone from the pipes. His worry was for naught as the demon in the male flesh suit bent down, reached out and snapped the handcuffs.

Worry gave way to hunger.


"Please tell me… you're not licking my head…" Jane whispered harshly, her eyes clenched shut against the pain she knew was about to blast her. When she had gone flying backwards, she had known what she was going to hit and hadn't expected to wake up anytime soon, if ever. When she had come too, she was in an upright position, assumedly on one of the beds because underneath her butt and legs was soft but firm. She was reclining against something equally firm, and warm. She was guessing Sam.

Other than the fact that the back of her skull felt like it had been split open, the other thing that had her freaked was the fact that she could feel and hear him lapping at the wound. One hand was supporting her against him, the other held her hair.

Chancing it, Jane opened her eyes, grateful the lights were dimmed. Her legs were stretched out with Sam's stretched alongside hers and God damn it, he was licking her head. "Sam?!" Raising her voice made her head throb and she groaned, raising her hand to feel the area. "Stop."

"You taste weird."

His voice was husky, and almost confused, and she shuddered. "Sammy…"

"I'm not going to… you know. I was… curious."

"Demons… there were demons." Jane let her eyes close again, swallowing hard. If he was just tasting her, she didn't want to imagine what he had done to them. "Did you…?"

"They're dead."

"Are you done eating me?"

He laughed and it was humorless. "Like I said, you taste weird."

"Weird how?" She pulled a face, feeling him leaning towards her moments before pain zinged through her head as he took another lick. "Goddamn it, Sam! Stop… stop tasting me!"

"We'll… we'll talk about this later, or never." Sam seemed to regain himself and began gently untangling himself from her, frowning. "I'll do a quick patch job on you but I got to get to Dean."

"We."

"Whatever."


"Oh, you can smirk and joke and lie to your brother, to your wife, lie to yourself, but not me! I can see inside you, Dean. I can see how broken you are, how defeated. You can't win and you know it. But you just keep fighting. Just… keep going through the motions. You're not hungry, Dean, because inside, you're already dead."

Dean's eyes widened slightly as Famine turned away from him, towards Sam. "Sammy, no!" He did not miss the blood on his brother's face, or the pinched look on his wife's.

A few of the demons that had been playing bodyguard to the Horseman moved forward towards Sam, shifting their positions, readying to attack him.

"No!" Famine raised a frail hand, gesturing them back. "No one lays a hand on this sweet boy's head. Sam… I see you got the snack I sent you."

Those demons… Jane felt bile rising up into her throat. They had been a 'snack', like she had been a sampler.

"You are special Sam, different. You can take as much as you want, you'll never die like anyone else."

Sam was not like anyone else. He had basically been custom designed to be a vessel. Just like Dean had. Just like she had been… an accessory to Dean's vessel.

Where was God in all this?


"Let me out of here! Please!"

Sam was back in Bobby's panic room, though at this rate, it was going to wind up renamed into something fitting. Something more along the lines of Sam Detox Chambers. Jane slumped back against the wall, glancing over at Dean. He was staring at the door, Castiel along side him, back to his normal, doesn't need to eat self. Dean looked so blank, like a clean slate, and he wasn't giving anything away with his eyes. She knew now something was wrong, seriously wrong, something she hadn't noticed until hearing Famine.

She had been so wrapped up in herself, in finding out about herself, and angry at him for withholding information, that she hadn't noticed something was wrong with him. That the fire he exuded was more for show than anything these days. Hell, was he even happy when they were having those moments when it was just them and the world ceased to be? Or was he faking for her sake?

"Dean, he's not himself. Not really."

"I know."

"He just needs to get this out of his system, in a few days-"

"I know, Cas. Look, I… I need some fresh air."

Castiel watched as Dean headed up the stairs, turning to look at Jane.

"He's having a human moment, he needs some time." She said softly. "He'll be all right." That was a lie, probably.

After a moment, Castiel nodded.

She wasn't surprised when he disappeared, he did that quite a bit. She pushed away from the wall and moved to the steel door, resting her forehead and palms against it. "Sam… please… this will pass."

"Jane, let me out, please! Please, let out!"

"I can't." She whispered, closing her eyes. How many times would they have to do this before all was said and done? How many times could they?

When she couldn't bear to hear him anymore, Jane went upstairs, wrapping her arms around herself.

"How's he doing?" Bobby asked when he spotted her coming in.

"He's…" Her shoulder slumped before she shrugged. "Same as before. He'll come around, out of it. He just needs to get the demon blood out of his system. Dean come through here?"

"Nope." He eyed her shrewdly, finally gesturing to the kitchen table. "Want to talk about it?"

A brief smile flickered across her face. "Getting soft on me, Bobby?"

"Hell no woman, I just know better than to let you mope around." He scoffed, already wheeling himself away from her. "Cryin' women, one thing I can't stand."

"One of many."

"Hey," He stopped, turning to look back at here. "Jane, in all seriousness, you know I'm here, right girl?"

"I know, Bobby."


"I need some help, please?"

Of all the things Jane imagined Dean doing out here, looking skyward and begging or praying for assistance was not one of them. Arms wrapped around herself, she quietly continued walking towards him, feeling her heart breaking with each word that fell from his mouth. It wasn't so much what he was saying but how he was saying it. He sounded like a broken man, and that was not something she could ever imagine him being.

"Of course… nothing."

His tone had changed, it was still broken but now tinged with bitterness, and anger.

"Would you still be here, you think, if They," He jabbed a finger towards Heaven. "hadn't interfered?"

"I don't know, does it matter?"

"Yes." He turned when he felt her hand on his shoulder, staring down into her eyes intently. "Would you even love me? Do you love me, or is it just… one of the side perks?"

"I love you, Dean." Jane said softly, knowing it probably wouldn't help him at all. He was wrestling with the same issues that had been plaguing her. Would she still be here if not for the fact that she had apparently been made just for him? Would she love him? None of that seemed important right now, not with him obviously hurting so badly. Maybe it was her 'programming', or whatever, but his lies, hiding information about her, her struggles with it, none of that mattered. It was trivial really, because at the end of the day, it changed nothing. She was still here, she still loved him, and she wasn't going anywhere. "Isn't that enough?"

"Is it?"

"Dean," Slowly, she reached out, taking his hands in hers. "I don't care anymore about the soul mate thing, or whatever. I'm here because I want to be here, because I do love you, and I'm with you until the very end."

"You heard what Famine said, Janey, I'm broken inside." He whispered hoarsely. "He was right, I've given up."

"No… you're not." She whispered back, sliding one hand free in order to reach up and cup his face. His eyes slowly closed and she felt him leaning into her palm, wishing she could soothe him, help ease his torment. "No, you haven't."

"How do you know?"

"Because Dean, if you really were broken, if you really had given up, you wouldn't be out here asking for help."

He snorted at that. "And I got the same answer I always get. Not a damn thing."

"I'm here, with you, and I'm not leaving. You're not in this alone Dean, and nobody else is giving up yet. I'm not giving up, not on the world, and not on you."