Light Shines Anew
Chapter 4: Beating The Odds
Yuma rolled onto the couch, cushioning his head with his arm while he stared at the ring on his other. It sucked. He couldn't even enjoy the food at Kageura's family restaurant. He didn't think it was possible, but a sour, tense atmosphere really did make the food taste bad.
"Because I don't give up." Kageura snapped. "Since when do you?"
A fist knocked against Yuma's forehead. He wasn't quitting. To quit, he would have had to have started at some point and not once in the last five years had Yuma tried to find a way to save his life so he wasn't quitting anything. Kageura didn't understand anything he was talking about.
"Why is there a depressed Yuma on the couch?" Karasuma asked, leaning against the counter in the kitchen as he stared over at the couches. It had been a long time since he last saw Yuma look so miserable.
"Yuma's in a mood again." Hyuse replied, not looking up from the videos Yotaro was showing him on his tablet.
"You would think with the B-Rank Wars starting soon and his birthday right after, he would be excited." Konami said. It was strange. Yuma had been so excited and raring to go last night. It was like all that energy just left him. Actually, seeing Yuma like this had her getting a bit scared. This wasn't like Yuma at all. The only time she had ever seen her friend like this was when his father was running around as a Mimic.
Yuma shifted on the couch to roll onto his back, arm still cushioning his head. The kitchen wasn't that far from the living room and Yuma wasn't deaf. Why did Karasuma and Konami always think he couldn't hear them when they were talking in the kitchen?
He was excited for the B-Rank Wars. His birthday was pretty meh to him, but the B-Rank Wars were going to be fun. The problem was Jin's prediction was pulling at his heart. If he could just push it to the back of his mind, he could properly enjoy what little time he had left. He really wished that Jin hadn't told him. It would have made everything so much easier.
Instead, Yuma's thoughts were haunted.
Haunted by the idea of how this would be his last B-Rank War.
Haunted by the fact that when he looked at his friends, he realized they were going to leave him behind. Or was it that Yuma was leaving them behind?
Haunted by the thoughts of how soon he would have his last rank war.
His last outing to Kageura's family restaurant.
His last match with Konami.
His last team meeting with Tamakoma-2.
His last defense duty.
His last...
"Yu-Ma!" Konami's knuckles dug into Yuma's head hard enough to apply pressure that would get through to Yuma. When those red eyes blinked up at her, Konami determined that was enough of a sign that Yuma was dragged out of his thoughts so she grabbed his wrists and yanked hard enough to pull him up to his feet. Once his feet were solidly on the ground, Konami planted her hands on Yuma's shoulders, tightening her grip to dig the pads of her fingers into them as a form of comfort. Yuma may not be able to feel much, but he could get the sensation of pressure so they always tried to press hard enough that he could acknowledge it. Yuma never said anything about it, but Konami believed that he appreciated the sentiment of them trying to give him a sense of feeling as much as possible.
"What's up, Konami-senpai?" Yuma asked.
"I'm the one who should be asking you that." Konami retorted, eyes scanning Yuma up and down, trying to find anything that was out of place. "The only time you ever get depressed like this is when it has to do with your father. Did something happen?"
"Just got into a fight with Kage-senpai."
Konami raised a brow. "Considering his disposition, it was only a matter of time before you two fought." She frowned. "Though, I don't think that would have you laying on a couch all depressed, Yuma. You don't let arguments get to you."
Yuma took a step back from his mentor and let himself collapsed back into the couch, leaning back into it to get comfortable. "I suppose...I just feel very mortal right now." He knocked his head back on the couch so he could tilt it back to look at the ceiling so he could avoid looking at Konami. It wasn't something he liked to admit. Everyone was mortal. From the moment they were all born, they are all destined to die one day. Yuma's death would just be earlier than everyone's else. It never bothered him before, but with Jin's warning of it approaching quickly, Yuma had never felt more mortal since the day the assassin attacked him.
Konami's mind blanked for a second as Yuma's words hit him. Mortal? Everyone died someday, but for most people, it wasn't something they thought about it because that was in the future and the future was unknown to everyone except Jin. It was easy for them to go through each day without worry because an unknown future shouldn't affect their daily lives. That was how it was normally, but for Yuma, it was different. It was like someone who was sick with a deadly disease that couldn't be cured. They had to face death every day as each new day was taking them a step closer to dying from what was affecting them.
The thing was, Yuma didn't tend to bring it up. Konami had no idea if the fact that he was dying or about his injured body ever passed through his mind. Yuma never spoke up about it unless he was asked, so this felt completely out of the blue for Konami.
Konami sat down on the couch next to Yuma with her hand falling on his fluffy hair, tangling her fingers in the locks in a comforting manner. Yuma got along with people very easily so there weren't many people who would argue with him. That number was even less when it was amongst his friends, especially when Yuma gave them nothing to argue about. He was just so easy going and relaxed.
"Did something happen between you and Kageura-san to make you feel that way?" Konami asked slowly. This wasn't her area of expertise so she really didn't know what Yuma needed her to say until she fully understood the situation.
"A lot happened, not just with him." Yuma admitted. He glanced up at his mentor, feeling a bit annoyance and a bit of happiness to see the worry in her eyes thrown at him. He didn't like having people worried for him, but he supposed it was better than pity. "I think I said something wrong and hurt him and Shun and Murakami-senpai."
"What did you say?" Konami asked curiously. It wasn't that Yuma put his foot in his mouth. It was simply the fact that he happened to be too blunt a lot of the time. He didn't hold anything back. If he wanted to insult someone, he would do it without hesitating or mincing words.
"That I wasn't planning to get my real body back and that I accepted my death." Yuma admitted. He wished it was his imagination, but he knew for a fact that the sharp intake of air from Konami did happen. This really was something he should have made clear with everyone a while ago. As much as he wished he could go on living, he wouldn't try a risky operation that was more likely to kill him faster. He didn't want to die sooner than he already was.
Konami didn't rage like Yuma probably thought she would. Instead, her face turned towards her student and she dropped her forehead against the side of his head. "We knew that."
Yuma blinked. "What?"
"Maybe they didn't know, but we at Tamakoma knew." Konami explained. "You never bring it up. You never ask Rindo-san how Kinuta-san's research into medical applications of Trion is going. You accepted it a long time ago since you were by yourself for a long time and had no choice but to accept it. That part of you hasn't changed."
Yuma's nails dug into the cushion under him.
"But Replica disagreed with your acceptance." Konami continued. "After we found out about your body, I talked to Jin and Osamu because I figured it would be easier to take questions to them than to you. Especially right after the Mimics attacked. You came to Japan to find a way to revive Kuga-san, but Replica wanted to find a way to return you to your body."
Yuma swallowed. He had known what Replica wanted, but he hadn't thought about that in months. Ever since he lost Replica to Aftokrator, he had just been focused on training and getting ready to get Replica back. He knew what Replica wanted for Yuma though. It was hard to not know when Yugo created Replica to be Yuma's guardian. Yuma's safety was top priority for Replica unless Yuma gave him different orders to focus on.
"You may have accepted that you are going to die young, but you have to also accept that the rest of us, those who care about you, haven't accepted it." Konami wrapped her arm around Yuma, pulling him closer to her, and buried her face in his hair.
But when they failed, it would only make it that harder for them to accept Yuma's death. Hope was a very painful thing. When that hope didn't work out like they wanted, it would feel like a punch to the gut. Not even trying was much easier. Giving up hurt, but so did hope when that hope failed. It was easier to not try and deal with that pain rather than try and then fail and then have to give up. That was double the pain.
Yuma didn't want to chase a supposed miracle cure only to fall and slam his knees into the ground when it didn't work out in his favor. He didn't want to chase the light of the future where all his friends were walking towards while he fell into the dirt and had to watch them go on to a future that wasn't meant for him. He didn't want to face that crushing loneliness again.
"Konami-senpai, you know I don't want to die, right?" Yuma asked. "Just because I accepted my death that doesn't mean I wish it didn't have to happen."
"Then why don't you want to stop it?" Konami asked.
Because he was terrified of it failing.
If it failed, he would die right away. He wanted this life of his to last as long as it could. He didn't want to take the risk of losing what little time he had left.
"Hey, Yuma, what is this?" Rindo paused as he came into the room and looked up from his phone. He paused what he was asking when he saw Konami hugging Yuma on the couch as he felt like he was suddenly interrupting something.
Yuma gently eased out of the hug and turned to sit on his knees and rested his arms on the back of the couch to look at Rindo. He was quite thankful for the interruption. He didn't think he could handle any more heavy talks today. "What's what?"
Rindo's eyes flickered from Yuma to Konami with a frown. Considering what he knew about Yuma's current condition getting worst, he was likely having a serious conversation with Konami that he just butted into. While Konami seemed annoyed at the interruption, Yuma looked ready for the conversation to end.
Rindo coughed and approached the couch. He would give Yuma the reprieve that he needed. It was better to not push him too hard right now. He turned his phone towards Konami and Yuma. "Why is Shinoda-san sending me a bill for a car accident?"
A guilty look overtook Yuma's expression. "I can pay for it."
"No, it's fine." Rindo held up a hand to stop Yuma from taking the stack of bills he undoubtedly had stuffed away in his hoodie despite people constantly telling him to not carry it all around. "I can write a check. Just, what happened?"
Yuma scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I got distracted and walked into traffic. Murakami-senpai didn't want the police involved since my body healed itself so he said Border would handle the payment to fix the driver's car."
Rindo and Konami stared at Yuma. Over in the kitchen, Karasuma paused in making dinner and looked over at him as well. Yotaro paused his video and he and Hyuse turned to stare incredulously as well.
"I thought we were passed this!" Konami said incredulously.
"We are!" Yuma insisted. "I mean, I am. It was a bad moment! A complete accident."
Rindo turned his phone back to him and sighed. He had a fairly good idea of why Yuma was distracted which caused this to happen in the first place. "Just don't walk into traffic again, okay?" He requested, rubbing at his temples. Yuma was such a special case to cause him headaches like this.
Yuma nodded. "Sorry, boss."
*L*S*A*
Kageura viciously tore through the Trion soldiers he had Hikari activate for him in their training room in their squad room. Murakami just watched from next to Hikari's chair as Kageura fought without stopping and found himself just sighing.
After their disaster of a lunch, Yuma ran off to go back to Tamakoma. Murakami wasn't sure if it was because he wanted to get away from them or because he didn't feel like training anymore since it seemed he wasn't in the mood today. Kageura, on the other hand, was in a horrible mood and was snapping at anyone who dared to walk into his path. To save everyone else, especially the trainees, Murakami pushed him towards his squad's room and away from the solo rank booths.
"I haven't seen Kage in such a horrible mood in a long time." Hikari commented, blinking in surprise as Kageura's Scorpion viciously slashed a marmod into multiple pieces. "What set him off?"
"Ah, Kuga." Murakami said, leaving it at that as he didn't really want to get into Yuma's insensitive comments. He didn't think Yuma even saw them as insensitive. The thing was, to Yuma, personally since it was about himself, he didn't seem them as insensitive. However, for Yuma's friends who cared about his wellbeing, the comments felt very insensitive since Yuma wasn't acknowledging their feelings on the matter.
"Kuga? You mean Tamakoma's Kuga?" Hikari asked for clarification. She only knew the one Kuga, but it was baffling to her that it was Kuga Yuma who set Kageura off like this. Those two were like two peas in a pod. Kageura had a hard time getting along with people because of his side effect, but he hit it off very easily with Yuma.
"Yeah."
Hikari stared at her captain jumping down from a building and impaling his sword on top of the next marmod he found. "We fight Tamakoma in two days. Do you think he will have calmed down by then or am I going to have to be prepared for him to go after Kuga again?"
The two watched Kageura use his Mantis to slice through a building to get the Trion Soldier inside that was then chopped up into pieces and left as a smoking corpse in his wake.
"I would be prepared for the worst." Murakami suggested.
"You can't play mediator to get them to calm down?" Hikari asked.
"No," Murakami turned away from the monitors to go sit on the couch as he waited for Kageura to work out his aggravation. "Because I'm mad at Kuga too." He may have been the calmest of the group at lunch, but that didn't mean Murakami wasn't upset too. It was frustrating to watch a friend, a friend they all fought desperately to save three months ago, just give up on his own life. What was the point of all that effort if Yuma was just going to throw it away now? To make it worse, Murakami didn't feel like Yuma gave them a concrete reason for why he didn't want to at least attempt to find a solution.
Hikari sat straighter in her chair to glance over her monitors at Murakami in surprise. Murakami did not get mad at people. In the pair of Kageura and Murakami, he was the calm, sensible one who reigned Kageura in. What exactly did Kuga do?
She pulled her phone closer to her.
Hikari: Warning. Kuga and Kageura got into a fight. Be prepared for a war in our match in two days.
Zoe: That sounds terrifying
Ema: Just avoid Kuga and Kage-san in the match. We do our usual and let Kage-san do what he wants and support him from a very far distance
Zoe: Very, very far distance. And then get Yuma-kun an apology gift afterwards for Kage's rage
Hikari: The fight is apparently Kuga's fault.
Zoe: ?
Hikari put her phone back on the desk. It's not like she knew anything else about the situation. Murakami didn't seem to be too willing to talk about the fight. She frowned when her attention was drawn to the monitors to see Kage's Mantis slicing through the support beams of a building and bringing it down. This coming match was going to be a nightmare.
*L*S*A*
"Mikumo-senpai!"
Osamu slammed a hand on the elevator doors to prevent them from closing when he heard Shun and then saw him jogging down the hall. It wasn't often that Shun came looking for him. If he spent any time with Tamakoma agents, it was usually Yuma or Jin.
Shun skidded into the elevator, slamming into the railing against the back wall before righting himself and turning to face Osamu.
Taking his hand away from the doors so they would close, Osamu turned to face the younger agent. Now that Shun was right next to him, Osamu saw that he wasn't his usual smiling, happy go lucky self. He actually looked quite distressed about something.
"What happened?" Osamu asked worriedly as the pieces began to form in his head. Shun was looking for him. Shun spent a lot of time with Yuma. Yuma was acting strange this morning. Yuma got into a disagreement with Jin last. Not this crap again. He should have pushed for an answer from Yuma.
"Uh, well to start with Yuma-senpai got hit by a car earlier." Shun started.
Osamu stared at Shun for a moment before his hand was pushing his glasses up so he could massage at his eyes. Okay, a car accident wasn't good, but it was Yuma. He could easily walk away from that. "Alright, but I don't think that would be enough to make you run up to me as upset as you are."
"Well, after that happened, we started talking. By we, I mean, Yuma-senpai, Murakami-senpai, Kageura-san and me." Shun explained.
Osamu nodded along, motioning for Shun to keep talking.
"And then Yuma-senpai started saying stuff like how he wasn't planning to get his real body back and that he had already accepted his death!" Shun explained frantically, voice getting higher with each word he said.
Osamu held up a hand, hoping Shun would get the idea to give him some peace from the near shouting and properly process everything the young agent was saying.
"He was talking about how he didn't want to die, but he wasn't going to try to save his life either!" Shun continued on, ignoring Osamu's call for peace. "It makes no sense to me. And then I thought it was his guilt for his father's death talking. And then–"
"Midorikawa!" Osamu rose his own voice slightly to get the younger agent to hear him.
Shun's mouth clinked shut, mostly out of surprise. Osamu never rose his voice like that.
"I'm aware." Osamu said. "Kuga has never once tried to find a way to save his life. He never even talks about getting his real body back. Maybe at once, it was because of the guilt he felt, but now I think it's more because he accepted his death a long time ago so he sees no reason to shift to a different path."
"And you're just okay with that?!" Shun demanded angrily.
Osamu pushed his glasses up, sighing. "No, Midorikawa. I hate the idea of Kuga dying, but there is nothing I can do to save him. That is out of my hands. I know Kinuta-san is doing research on medical applications of Trion, but I also know he is nowhere near an answer that can help Kuga."
"So, there is a plan in the works?" Shun asked hopefully.
Osamu pursed his lips at that. "Yes, however, Kuga has shown no interest in the plan and like I said, Kinuta-san hasn't gotten very far in his research. It's very likely Kuga could die before Kinuta-san finds a solution."
It seemed all energy left Shun as he slouched back against the elevator wall. That wasn't what he wanted to hear at all. He was hoping that there would be a more concrete plan in motion.
"Even if there was a concrete plan in place, Kuga would have to agree to it anyway. We can't force him to do anything." Osamu replied. They couldn't force him, but persuading him was another thing entirely.
Shun glanced out the window, staring at the Restricted Zone. "If there was a solution to his condition, do you think Yuma-senpai would take it?"
Osamu followed Shun's gaze to stare out at the destroyed buildings though he wasn't really seeing them. He was seeing a night from so long ago of a depressed Yuma on the roof of Tamakoma talking about his father with Osamu. Yuma had spoken of his father and how his father didn't need to die. Yuma never spoke of his own condition that night with Osamu.
Replica once said Yuma needed a purpose to go on living. Osamu gave him that purpose and Yuma stood up from the roof's ledge and agreed to Osamu's plan of forming a team. They had accomplished their goal when they went on the away mission and helped Chika search for her brother and friend. Yuma had gotten Replica back. The reason Yuma joined Border was to help them. Now that they returned from the away mission, Yuma could have quit Border and gone back to the Neighborhood like he planned back in Japan, but he hadn't. A week had passed and Yuma is still happily running around Border like it was a playground. Perhaps Yuma was simply hanging around to wait for Kinuta to fix Replica, but Osamu liked to believe that wasn't the only reason Yuma stayed.
"I like to think he would." Osamu decided. Because the Yuma who needed a purpose to live wouldn't be hanging out in Border without a goal to accomplish.
It wasn't much, but those words did help to reassure Shun a bit. There wasn't a solution to Yuma's condition yet, but the research and development department was looking into it.
Shun blinked as he focused more on the scenery outside. The unmoving scenery. "Haven't we been in the elevator kind of long?"
Osamu blinked and looked at the control panel, blushing when he realized he didn't select a floor. He quickly pressed the floor he wanted. Whoops.
Shun snickered as the elevator began to move before he got serious again. "One more thing, Mikumo-senpai."
Osamu glanced over his shoulder. "Yes?"
"Kageura-san is furious with Yuma-senpai over this whole thing. Watch your back in the rank war." Shun warned.
Well, that just told Osamu that Kageura was going to target Yuma in the match. That was something he already predicted might happen, though now it might be worse since he was apparently mad at him.
As he stepped off the elevator, he turned to Shun, but the younger agent stayed on the elevator, waving him off. Osamu raised a brow as the doors closed to separate them. Shun really just rode the elevator with him to simply talk. If Shun wasn't leaving yet, they could have talked on the previous floor before going their own ways.
Well, whatever.
Osamu had other things to concern himself with apparently.
Like Kuga getting into it with other agents who were scared of their friend dying.
Osamu understood the position the other agents were in because he was in the same spot as them. He was scared of the day when Yuma would die. He was upset Yuma accepted it so easily. However, all Osamu could do right now was be Yuma's friend and support him in any way he could. The best thing for Yuma right now was for him to realize how much his friends cared for him and would support him. Osamu wanted his friend to realize he didn't need a purpose to live. He could live his life simply because he wanted to.
Osamu's steps came to a halt. Replica told him Yuma needed a purpose, a goal, to drive him to keep hanging onto his life. That goal was complete. There was nothing tying Yuma here, and yet he still remained. That meant either Yuma was happy with life right now and decided he didn't need another goal to keep pushing himself forward or he had simply given up on life and was waiting for time to run out.
It was hard to tell with Yuma. Except for today where Yuma seemed to be acting off, Yuma had been extremely happy since they returned to Japan. Yuma was always happy and having fun. It just seemed like it got dialed up to an eleven since the away mission ended. If Yuma was acting off today and getting into a fight with his friends, then something set him off and put him in a weird mood.
Maybe he should talk to Yuma to clear some things up.
*L*S*A*
A headache was brewing.
Shinoda rubbed his temples as he walked down the hall. Between Yuma's time running out soon and Yuma getting into car accidents, Shinoda's stress was peaking. He was hoping for some peace after the away mission to give everyone and everything time to settle down after a long, difficult mission.
Shinoda should have known better. When he was a teenager and freshly new to Border, life was always crazy and energetic. It wasn't just because of the youthful energy of him and Rindo being in Border. Yugo, Mogami, and Kido brought their own energy and eccentricities to Border. Part it was they were all so much younger back then. The other part of it was that Border was still new and they were still learning. In a sense, they were naiver. There was a lot they had to learn.
Things had changed a lot since then.
Yugo left and then died. Mogami died. Kido declared Neighbors the enemy.
With Kido's declaration and the sudden growth of Border, everything had calm down after the first large scale invasion. When Yuma came to Japan back in December, things started to get frantic again. Almost everything that happened wasn't because of Yuma. It would have happened without Yuma being here, but ever since Yuma arrived in Japan, he brought a familiar sense to Shinoda that he hadn't felt since before Yugo left. The Kugas must hold a certain aura around them because Shinoda was sure Rindo and Kido felt the same way.
They lost this excitement when Yugo left.
Shinoda didn't want to lose it again from Yuma dying.
Shinoda's knuckles knocked against the door frame. Since the door was already opened, he only knocked to gain the occupant's attention. "Good afternoon, Kinuta-san."
Kinuta grunted as he looked up from his desk. "Director Shinoda." He greeted politely. He waved his arm over his desk to bring attention to the array of Triggers and papers that covered it. "I am a bit busy as you can see."
It had already been a week since they returned from the away mission. Along with finding the missing people and Replica, Shinoda had made sure he and his agents managed to acquire Triggers from the nations they visited. Despite how much Border had advanced in recent years, there was still a lot they could learn so Kinuta was always eager when they got their hands on Neighbor Triggers. He had a whole department of engineers who could study them, but he liked to look at them as well.
Despite how Kinuta felt about Neighbors, Shinoda was sure he could appeal to a desire to gain more knowledge about Triggers and Trion with this.
Shinoda stepped into the office and walked towards his desk. "I apologize for bothering you, but this is a time sensitive matter." He put the tablet Rindo left with him on the desk and slid it towards Kinuta. "I would appreciate it if you could study this."
"And what is this?" Kinuta picked up the tablet and began to scan the file quickly. He would give it a more thorough read through later.
"It's from Rindo. He got it from Galopoula." Shinoda said quickly. It was best to get that part out of the way with as quickly as possible. Nothing good would come from trying to hide it.
Kinuta's eyes frozen halfway through a sentence. "Galopoula?" He questioned. He wanted to be surprised, but this was just like something Tamakoma would do. First, they use their Aftokrator prisoner as a Tamakoma agent. And now they were making friends with Galopoula. They always knew Tamakoma wanted to make friends with Neighbors, but he didn't think they would have the gall to try to befriend every Neighbor that attacked them.
Shinoda held his hands up for peace. "I know."
"I don't think you do." Kinuta grunted. "They attacked us. They attacked our base."
"Yes," Shinoda agreed. "But that was because Aftokrator forced them to or they would have been wiped out. To get back at Aftokrator, Galopoula agreed to work with Tamakoma and because we were able to cooperate on the away mission, it led to the mission's success. They feel they owe us and want to repay us for that, so Tamakoma has requested their help with Yuma-kun's real body. They are actually quite advanced with medical applications of Trion."
"I can see that with just a quick scan of this." Kinuta said, tapping the side of the tablet. "What are you planning with this?"
"Rindo wants to send Yuma-kun to Galopoula to have them return him to his real body. However, Yuma-kun doesn't want to do this." Shinoda explained.
Kinuta raised a brow. He was nowhere near a solution to help Yuma so Galopoula was his only solution right now. "Why are you showing me this then?"
"You will likely understand it better than Rindo and myself. I would like you to study up on it and talk to Yuma-kun." Shinoda said.
"Sending Kuga to Galopoula would require use of the away ship." Kinuta said, turning his attention back to the tablet. "It might be easier for me to study this and see if we can replicate it."
Shinoda shook his head. "Even with Galopoula's expertise on this type of operation, it is still only a twenty percent success rate. I suppose that is why Yuma-kun doesn't want to go through with this."
"And you think me explaining the operation to him will change his mind?" Kinuta asked. "It won't change the fact that it is still only a twenty percent chance it will work."
"But it's all we have." Shinoda planted his hands on the desk and leaned forward, bowing his head towards Kinuta. "Jin predicated Yuma-kun only has a month left before he dies. We're out of time, Kinuta-san. Please."
Kinuta stared at Shinoda in surprise. He wasn't expecting the Commander of Border's defense to bow to him like this. The fact that he was bowing just told Kinuta how desperate the man was to save his mentor's son. He hated the way Tamakoma handled things, but he did owe Yuma for his help and this way, he could learn more about medical applications for Trion and Triggers. It would surely help advance his research.
"I'll take a look, but I doubt I will be able to convince Kuga of anything."
"Thank you."
*L*S*A*
"Welcome back, Osamu-kun!" Shiori greeted from the second story balcony. "You're just in time for dinner."
"Is Chika here?" Osamu asked as he removed his shoes.
"She left a few hours ago." Shiori replied. "She said she wanted to have dinner with her family but that she would be here tomorrow for the final team training for the match."
Osamu nodded his head. That was understandable. Ever since they returned from the away mission with Rinji, Chika had been splitting her time between Tamakoma and home. She wanted to spend time with her brother to get reacquainted with him, but she also wanted to spend time at Tamakoma because in the months since Rinji had been gone, Chika had grown up and began to build her own life.
"Torimaru-kun made dinner." Shiori added as she came downstairs.
Osamu checked his watch. "It's earlier than usual." He thought he had arrived at least an hour before dinner.
"Hmm, he has his part time after this and Yuma-kun and Jin-san have defense duty." Shiori explained. "What about you?"
"Eh, well, I might study the logs." Osamu replied.
"All work and no play." Shiori teased.
Osamu smiled softly. "I suppose I'm still worried about which map Ikoma squad will choose." He said as they entered the living room. "With it being the first match, Ikoma squad will likely be wary of our tactics from last season. If they can prevent us from using some of our strategies, then they'll be more aware of how we will move. On top of that," He paused and looked across the room where Yuma and Hyuse were already at the dining room table. "Someone got Kageura-san mad at him and that will likely effect who he will target."
Yuma clicked his tongue in reply. "You heard about that."
"Yes, I heard about it. Are you okay?"
"Yeah. Kage-senpai was the one who got mad."
Hyuse snorted. "And you were all depressed when you came back."
A second later Hyuse hissed in pain so Osamu could only assume Yuma kicked him under the table. Hyuse couldn't even kick him back because it wouldn't hurt Yuma.
"Kuga," Osamu joined his teammates at the table and sat down. "I'm serious. Midorikawa was worried about you."
Yuma knocked his head back against his chair. Shun went to his captain? Seriously? He raised his hands off the table. "Osamu, I promise, everything is good."
"Your eyes just turned black." Hyuse retorted.
Double edged sword.
Yuma cursed in his head. "Alright, fine. So, I'm bothered by some things, but I'm working through it."
Hyuse pointed a finger in his face. "Get it figured out before our match in two days. We can't have you distracted in the fight."
Yuma gave him a thumbs up. He could get himself figured out. He just had to get out of his depressed slump about the fact that he was dying soon and focused on having fun. Forget the negative news and focused on the present for now. He couldn't let himself be depressed and annoyed for the next month just because of something he always knew was coming. It would ruin his last month alive.
Osamu sighed, rubbing at his eyes. He thought he and Kuga were long past Kuga causing him stress. "I really don't understand how you keep getting hit by cars."
"It only happened three times!" Yuma protested. Granted, two of those times were on the same day, but the third time was months apart from the last two.
"Hyuse is a Neighbor too so cars are new to him, but he's never been hit by one." Jin pointed out as he arrived just in time to hear the conversation.
Hyuse scoffed. "I also don't live in a Trion body so I'm more cautious."
Unfortunately, Osamu knew that Hyuse was right. It's not that Yuma was reckless. It's just outside of battle when there was no danger around, he was a lot more relaxed and that caused him to be not as cautious. If he could behave like he did in battle outside of battle, Osamu thought his life would be easier and stress levels would be at a manageable level.
"Kuga, even if it doesn't hurt you, you are destroying property of other people and causing them trauma by having them hit a child." Osamu pleaded. He could at least appeal to Yuma's better nature and that was that he didn't actually want to hurt people who have done nothing to him.
"I apologized." Yuma said.
Osamu stared down at the table, contemplating just face planting it. He didn't do that since that would ruin the food Karasuma was laying out for dinner. Instead, he just took a deep breath. This was not nearly as bad as Yuma's first couple of days in Japan. Yuma had gotten so much better recently, but maybe leaving Japan for an away mission for as long as they were gone for made Yuma forget things. Hyuse said he was more cautious than Yuma and that's why this never happened to him, but Osamu felt there was more to it. It had to be because of the different ways they were raised.
"You might kill our captain from stress." Hyuse commented.
"Hmm, doubtful." Yuma replied. "He survived the stress of being captain and getting us to B-Rank #2 and on the away mission. He can survive this to."
"Like dealing with stress on the daily will make him better able to handle stress in high stress battles?" Hyuse asked.
"Exactly." Yuma agreed with a laugh coating his voice.
"Kuga, no." Osamu said with a tired sigh while Jin and Shiori just laughed in amusement.
*L*S*A*
Food really did taste better when the atmosphere wasn't stifling. It almost got stifling with how Osamu started asking him about what happened, but they were able to divert the conversation from the heavy topic which Yuma really appreciated. He wasn't in the mood for any more heavy conversations today, but unfortunately, he had a feeling that he wasn't done.
Yuma knew Jin told him earlier today that they had defense duty together tonight, however Yuma also knew that he and Jin weren't originally on the schedule to be on defense duty together tonight.
"Did you have Boss change the schedule for tonight?" Yuma asked.
"Hmm?" Jin hummed innocently.
Yuma scowled before sighing. "You want to talk after I ran off last night. You can talk to me at Tamakoma. You didn't have to drag me on defense duty with you."
"Maybe I just wanted to spend some time with Yuma." Jin said cheerfully.
Yuma glanced back at where Jin was sitting on some rubble, just relaxing as so far the night was peaceful. Jin was considered a whole squad by himself. He did not need Yuma here for backup, but that didn't mean he didn't get what Jin was saying. Defense duty with friends was much more fun than doing it alone. It had to be lonely when Jin did defense duty alone.
Yuma found his own piece of rubble that he could relax on. He laid down on it, hands folded under his head to work as a pillow and stared up at the night sky. Months ago Shinoda told him about star constellations. He wanted to find them, but he truly didn't get how stars connected to form them.
"Yuma."
Yuma closed his eyes briefly. The laughter was out of Jin's tone which meant he was getting serious. "Yeah?"
"Are you going to tell anyone my prediction?" Jin asked. "Captain Four-Eyes doesn't seem to know." It really was quite reminiscent of what happened in the Mimic incident. He thought Yuma had come to fully trust his friends after that whole thing.
Yuma cracked his eyes open, lazily staring through slits to watch the stars looking down at him. "It's not that I want to keep it a secret. It's just...I know things will change if they all know I only have a month left. I don't want to...disrupt this."
Jin didn't know what 'this' was. Maybe Yuma didn't know how to put it into words.
"I know I need to tell them eventually. It's just, I need to wrap my head around it. I always knew this would happen one day and it likely would be soon, but you put a ticking clock right in my face and all I can see is it counting down." Yuma closed his eyes once more to block out the world around him. It didn't help. All it did was put an imaginary clock behind his eye lids. It was counting down. Before Jin spoke to him yesterday, if he imagined this, it would just be question marks as he never knew how long he had left. Now, now it was flashing red in warning.
"Yuma," Jin said softly. He didn't tell Yuma that to cause him this grief. He wanted to warn Yuma that they didn't have much time left. This was hugely time sensitive and they didn't have much time to wait around.
"My turn to ask a question." Yuma piped up before Jin could say anything else.
Jin refocused all of his attention towards where Yuma was still relaxing on the rubble. He blinked and looked towards the sky with a sigh. "Hold that thought, Yuma." Jin jumped to his feet and made his way over to where Yuma was lying. He grabbed Yuma's wrists and yanked hard enough to bring him up to his feet.
Yuma's eyes snapped open as his feet hit the ground.
"We got some visitors coming." Jin said, patting his cute kōhai on the head. "Shouldn't be too hard." He paused and glanced down at Yuma with a grin. "You could go back to your nap and leave this to your loving senpai."
"Sounds boring." Yuma called his Scorpion out just as a Gate opened nearby. "I can get to it faster than you."
"Oh?" Jin asked intrigued. "Bet I can kill more Trion Soldiers tonight than you."
Yuma eyed Jin out of the corner of his eyes, but didn't reply. Instead, he dropped a Grasshopper pad and launched himself down the road towards where the Marmods had appeared.
"Is that a yes to the bet?" Jin's voice buzzed through his comms.
Yuma twisted through the blades of the Marmod to get behind it where he brought his Scorpion down through it to cut it in half. A bet with Jin usually meant he was planning something. It wasn't difficult for Yuma to figure out what Jin would ask for if he won. On the other hand, Yuma didn't tend to run from a challenge.
"Fine," Yuma replied. He had no idea of how many Gates would open tonight in his and Jin's patrol area or how many Trion Soldiers would come through. He did know he was faster than Jin movement wise, but Jin had his side effect on his side to tell him when Gates would open so they each had their own advantage in this.
Jin came jumping down from the sky and slammed his Scorpion through the second Marmod right after Yuma agreed to the bet. If he didn't agree, he would have left the Trion Soldiers to Yuma. "And now we're tied." He said cheerfully, dropping his sword to rest on his shoulder.
Yuma huffed. Well, they had all night to go.
"So, what did you want to ask?" Jin asked to get them back on topic.
Yuma deactivated his Scorpion and crouched down on his dead Marmod to look towards the ground where Jin was standing. "Why did you have Tachikawa-san show me the video of my first rank war match against Murakami-senpai?"
"You can't guess?"
"I can." Yuma redirected his attention to the stars. "You think my twenty percent chance of winning against Murakami-senpai in the past is going to make me want to take the surgery with the same percentage of success."
Jin watched his young friend silently.
"Do you even understand what you're asking of me?" Yuma asked. "The gamble in the rank war was perfectly safe. It was a training match and if I did it in the field, I have bail out. But going to Galopoula? It's basically do or die, Jin-san, and the odds aren't in my favor."
"When are they ever?" Jin countered to Yuma's surprise. "Yuma, you've lived your whole life with the odds always being against you. I've seen your future. I've placed you into fights where you shouldn't have won, but I bet on you anyway and you've always managed to come out on top." Jin climbed up onto the dead Marmod so he could sit next to Yuma. "You see it as dying here or dying there, but I don't see it that way because you always beat the odds, Yuma. It is why I always bet on you."
Yuma shifted from crouching to sit crisscrossed, but kept his eyes locked forward though he could still see Jin from the corner of his eyes. "I get that you trust me enough to bet on me when the odds are against me, but Jin-san, in this situation, you have to bet on Galopoula for this to succeed. All the trust you have in me means nothing. I can't do anything to change the outcome. If I have to die, I want to have as much fun as I can before that happens."
"And how is that working out for you?" Jin retorted. He knew. He knew that today did not go the way Yuma wanted. There wasn't any fun for him.
Yuma scowled. No doubt Jin saw his future and how he would mess up his whole idea of having as much fun as he could in his last month alive. It was only one day so far. He just needed to get used to the idea that he knew what his time limit was now. It was easier to be happy and have fun without knowing when his time would be up. "It was just an off day. It certainly didn't help that you had Tachikawa-san ambush me and remind me of what you said last night. I've already accepted my death."
"If you've already accepted it, then nothing I do to try to change your mind should bother you." Jin replied. He scooted forward on the Marmod so he was in front of Yuma to force eye contact. "I accept that you think you've accepted your death, but you have to accept that your friends and me haven't accepted it and are going to fight you on your choice."
"I think I've accepted it?" Yuma parroted angrily.
Jin leveled his stare on Yuma's narrowed red eyes. "If you truly accepted it, then you would have been able to smile without a single care today. Instead, you fell into a depression because all you can think about is your clock ticking down."
Yuma wanted to get mad. He wanted to say that Jin was wrong and that he was completely fine with dying. His depression from today just came from the shock of information that Jin gave him last night.
But...
They both would have known how that was a lie and they didn't need Yuma's side effect to know that.
Instead, Yuma shifted to the side and slid down the Marmod to get down to the ground. "It didn't use to be a lie." He admitted, words tasting like ash on his tongue. "I was walking through life knowing that my impending death would catch up to me one day. I never ran from it because I knew I couldn't so I just coasted through life while waiting for it."
Jin dropped down next to Yuma.
"Coming to Japan changed my perspective on everything."
"One of the newbies, Yuma, has got quite a hard life." Jin said before taking a bite of his crackers. "So, I wanna give him a 'fun time.'"
"I know." Jin admitted. It was all he ever wanted for Yuma. "The day we met, I saw your death incoming, Yuma. It practically blinded me."
Yuma stepped a few steps away from Jin to get some space so he could turn and watch his friend.
"We didn't really know each other back then, but along with your death, I saw all the help you would give us if you became a Border agent. We weren't friends yet, but I decided that if you would help us, I would try to save your life." Jin explained. "When our allies need help, we extend a help. When they need our help, we'll reach a hand back out towards them."
"I never asked for your help." Yuma retorted.
Jin took a step towards his friend. "Teach Yuma how to have fun and the value of life and he'll want to live again."
Yuma jerked in surprise. That wasn't Jin talking to him. That sounded more like Jin's thought process back then. "You—"
"Life is worth living, Yuma. I wanted you to remember that. After you told me your past in Calvaria, I realized how much you had forgotten about what it means to be alive."
Yuma jerked away from Jin, getting away from him. "You–" He stopped abruptly, words struggling to get out of his throat. "I had–" He angrily kicked a rock and watched it soar through the air before it shattered a window on a rundown house. "I had accepted my death, Jin-san. I was ready for my time to run out whenever. And you–"
Jin raised a brow. He had never seen Yuma struggle with words as he was now. He might mispronounce words as he was still mastering Japanese, but he didn't stumble over what he was saying.
"You took that away from me." Yuma accused, voice sounding close to breaking from disbelief.
"I'm not going to apologize for helping you learn how to be happy again."
Yuma winced. It was a poor choice of words and annoyance from him. "That's not what I meant, Jin-san."
"Isn't it?" Jin countered.
Looking down at the ground, Yuma knocked some of the pebbles around. "I'm sorry, Jin-san. I'm truly grateful for you inviting me to Border and giving me this life. I truly haven't been this happy in years."
Happy and having fun. That was all Yugo ever wanted for Yuma. Ever since Yuma's experience with the Mimics and his Mimic father, Yuma had fully embraced his life and was living it to the fullest. He had already been doing that since he came to Japan and began to realize what it was to be happy again, but after everything with Yugo and Eleni and coming to terms with what happened, it felt like he was living his life the way they wanted.
Like he had been given their blessing and their pride for the choices he made.
Everything that had happened to him since him came to Japan was connected.
It was connected in a way to teach him happiness and embrace the idea of living despite the guilt he felt for Yugo's death.
"But that's why I'm upset. Because you have all made me so happy to be alive that I lost the ability to accept my death." Yuma didn't resent his friends for helping him remember how to be happy and to enjoy life. Being happy and enjoying life felt so foreign to him when he first started feeling it again, but now he didn't want to go back to the lost, depressed just going with the flow feeling he had embraced for four years. He didn't want to feel that empty ever again.
All his friends helped him so much and they didn't even realize it.
"And with that loss, I realized that I'm now terrified of dying." Yuma admitted, kicking another rock away from him. He had never been scared of his death before. His impending death had just been a fact of life.
A pair of arms suddenly wrapped around him from behind and pulled Yuma back into a strong chest.
"There's nothing wrong with that, Yuma. It just makes you human." Jin replied. "Anytime someone is put in a perilous situation where they might get killed, they all feel fear. It's natural."
Yuma's hand came up to grab one of the arms wrapped around him.
"I'm sorry."
Yuma's eyes opened in shock before softening. "Thought you weren't going to apologize."
"I'm not apologizing for that." Jin said softly. "It's for not recognizing the fear you have. You've always been so strong and ready to face anything thrown at you that I didn't pause to think about how scared you would be. These past few months I have been focused on protecting my cute juniors and helping you learn how to be happy again. When I spoke to you last night, I failed to realize how it might scare you."
"Jin-san, I respect that you want to save me because you feel you owe me for the help I've given Border–"
"It's not just because of that. You are my friend, Yuma." Jin stressed. He would not have Yuma thinking his actions were only because Jin felt he owed a debt. Jin did not want to lose friends. He didn't want to go through that pain again.
Yuma nodded. "Right. But I just can't put my trust in Galopoula on a twenty percent chance of success. Maybe if it was higher..." He shook his head and broke away from Jin's hug. "I don't want to die alone in Galopoula on an operating table, Jin-san. If I'm going to die, I want it to be in Japan while having fun." He glanced up at the night sky with a sad smile. "Under this sky of the home my father loved so much."
