Ryder
I could tell things with my mom were getting bad, she was always so sad. I was glad I had Matt in my life but I didn't see him much anymore, I wondered where he went. I didn't' want to ask mommy she was sad, but I missed him. I had no idea if another girl hurt mommy, why couldn't she just find someone, she could be with Matt. I really liked him but he was gone and it hurt me, we always had so much fun together, I had to go to school again and I didn't want too. "Bye Ryder have a good day" mommy said as she dropped me off, "Bye" I said to mommy and climbed out of the car. I walked into the school and was immediately pushed too the ground. "Awe the little girl going to cry?" the bully said, he called me a little girl. I didn't know why, but he was mean to me for no reason. "Does mommy have more girlfriends?" he asked, I just ignored him and walked away. I didn't need to answer to him, I was only 6 and I didn't need this. I hated mommy for not giving me a dad, I hated her for dating girls and I hated her for getting rid of Matt. I loved my mommy but I hated her for a lot of things. I didn't know what was going on but I was not going to let it happen anymore!
I spent my lunch break alone as usual but then it was weird for the first time ever a kid sat next to me. I had to look twice because at first I thought she was a boy, her hair was cut really short and she was wearing boys clothes. "I am Lacey" she said, "I am Ryder" "I know I see you around, boys are mean to you" she said. "Yeah because my mom dates girls" I said, "really my mom does too, I think she wants me to be a lesbian too" she said. "Is that why you dress like a boy?" I asked, "oh um no I just I am not sure why I do it" she said. Lacey and I hung out the rest of lunch and I remember Max asking me about her. I was going to tell him I met her and she was really nice. I noticed an older boy watching us he made me nervous it was a weird look, he made me feel uncomfortable. I decided to just let it go though, I knew mom was probably at work, I needed to take the bus home. I would have to stay with the neighbor again. Or I could just run off and find Matt, I knew he had to be close by, I wish I could remember where he lived.
I decided to walk instead of taking the bus, I wanted to go find Matt, I didn't want to go to the neighbor she smelled funny and always made me eat old food. I felt like I deserved an explanation of why he left, or why he hasn't been around for a while, I knew it was my mom's fault, she was the reason he wasn't there anymore. I had no idea where I was going, but I was determined I remember him saying something about hearing a train from his house, so I headed to the train station. I was surprised when I ran into that boy that was staring at me he was with an older man, "hey you go to my school right?" he said, "Um yeah" I said not sure if I should talking to him. "I am Zachary and this is Milton" he said, "Hi, I am Ryder" I said, "Ryder? do you have a mom named Cassie?" Milton asked, "yeah" I said, "hmm how is she doing after losing her job?" he asked, is that why my mom was so sad lately she lost her job. "Oh um she is fine" I said. "That is good she is a good doctor I am sure she will find something. Me on the other hand probably not I was lucky to get a job at the hospital" he said. "Why can't you find work?" I asked curious, "I have ADHD and well it affects me and people tend to think I act out which I can't help it because I can't afford the medication" he said. I didn't know what ADHD was but I didn't want to ask either he seemed really upset about it. "You were talking to Lacey today?" Zachary said, "yeah she made me feel better" he said, "I see well just be careful, and Ryder you ever have problems with the bullies come find me" he said. "Why?" I asked, "they make fun of you for no reason and I want to help" he said, "oh um thanks" I said. "No problem what brings you over this way anyways?" Zachary asked, "I was looking for my friend Matt but I have a feeling he is not here" I said. "Well you can hang out with us if you want, we were just going to head home" he said, "Okay thanks" I said as I followed them, I really didn't want to go home.
Cassie
I hated that I lost my job, I could tell Ryder was mad at me but I couldn't afford to keep paying Matt, and I had to let him go. I had been trying to find work all day. I applied for a few small clinics and other things but it was starting to feel like no one wanted a psych doctor. I knew they let Milton go too, he had ADHD and I tried to help him as much as I could. I was on my way home now knowing Ryder was at the neighbors I decided to go and rescue him picking up a pizza for us. I dropped the pizza off at home and went to get my son, I knocked on Mrs. Rodriguez door, "Oh hello" she said, "hey is Ryder ready to come home?" I asked, "oh he never showed up today I assumed you collected him" she said. "Wait he is not here?" I asked, "no oh dear" she said. I panicked for a quick second and tried not to think something bad happened to him, I ran back to my house and called my brother, "Cassie" Chase said, "Chase, Ryder is missing, he never came home from school" I said. "We will find him Cassie, don't panic" he said, I was panicking though I mean where could he have gone. I was beginning to think the worst and I fell to the floor and cried, I knew Chase and Max would find him, I had to believe that he was alright he was all I had. I couldn't lose him, I lost so much already and he was everything to me my baby boy I needed him to come home safe. I wondered if he maybe went looking for Matt so I decided to call him but he said he didn't see him. Matt said he would go and look, I felt like I should too but then if Ryder did come home I wouldn't be here. I was going to stay put and hope he was found soon, I just didn't know if I could handle him being gone forever, losing dad, and my job was hard enough. I go through girls like they are going out of style and I just wanted to settle down. I figured I should wait until Ryder is older though I just don't know anymore I felt like he was beginning to resent me. I mean sure he might only be 6 but I could see it in his eyes, despite how much I loved him he hated the fact he didn't have a father. I wished I could like men, but I couldn't so I was trying to forget about dating and concentrate on him but now I lost my job and things were just going from worse to worst! Ryder baby please come home!
