"A war is coming."
I glance up at Athena when she speaks. She's been saying ominous things like that all day and I frown when she inhales deeply-like she could smell the warning in the air. She has her fine head tilted towards the sky with her hair pulled back in a severely tight braid, looking every bit the warrior that she is in her armor and boots.
"Can my sisters not feel it too?" she asks, glancing at me and then to Artemis who is perched on a fallen log, using the pointed end of one of her silver arrows to clean her fingernails.
"That is the coming winter you are feeling," Artemis answers as my elbow slips into a mud puddle. I try to hide the fumble, but Athena notices my clumsiness and rolls her eyes.
I ignore her as I go back to following a small line of ants crawling along the forest floor, putting my hand in their path so they have to climb across my fingers. They sing a song of family and never ending work and I smile to myself to hear their whispered voices speaking as one. I am getting better at hearing the small creatures of the earth and it pleases me. Athena clears her throat and I look up to find her glaring at me.
I have no idea why my sisters decided to visit me, but they have been here since the morning sun woke me from my slumber. Artemis, with her head of curly hair, watched me from a tree branch above. I smiled when I saw her, rubbing sleep from my eyes with my skin damp with morning dew. Athena rested against a rock- looking annoyed and commenting on how long I slept.
I had no smiles for her.
"It is fast approaching," Artemis continues with a sigh. Never one to stay still, Artemis has been finding ways to entertain herself... all the while impatiently bobbing her feet or cracking her knuckles when her attention shifts to something new. "But I must say, I do quite like this between season Mother Demeter has given us," she says thoughtfully as a swirling gale dances through the forest with the giggle of the South Wind on its back. It flutters my cloak and causes a few leaves to shake loose from the branches above. "I find this weather crisp and refreshing."
I pick up one of the leaves and stare at its veins. It is a brilliant red color in the middle and it fades into soft yellow at each pointed tip. It is such a lovely design and I smile a little to myself again.
Mother has made the world colorful for me, changing my beloved forest from various shades of green to a range of vibrant yellows, warm oranges, vicious reds, deep purples, and faded browns. I am grateful for the gift and the beauty she has shown me because I know it is the last of the living earth I will see before I must fall back into the shadows... where my deceitful husband and his damned court will be waiting for me...
I shiver at the thought of him, but try to repress my feelings because they will do me no good...I will be strong in the face of my misfortune because I am my mother's daughter and I will be brave.
Sometimes that is all a woman can be.
"It is not the coming winter that troubles me," Gray eyed Athena answers sharply, fed up with Artemis as she grabs a stick to scrape mud from the bottom of her boot. I tuck the leaf in my bag with the others and crawl towards my mother's sacred tree to get away from her. "The call of battle burns through my veins like a thousand suns and the war drum beats within my heart."
She inhales against the wind. Her eyes closed. She curls her right hand into a fist and pounds it against her chest to keep time with the music only she can hear.
"It will be swift, and bloody, and a million hearts will break before it is through."
"You got all that from sniffing the air?" Artemis asks dryly and Athena opens her eyes to give her a firm glare. "What a rare talent you possess, dear sister. Who knew you were such a good sniffer?"
I laugh at that and Athena gives me a sharp look before turning back into her thoughts, finding more comfort in her own mind than with her sisters. She studies the mountains in the distance with the sun catching the gold fire of her armor, making it shine brilliantly in the divine way that makes her glow like the majestic creature she was born to be. A creature of the perfect day and everything I ever wanted to be...
I peek around the tree to spy on her profile... She is made up of all sharp angles and soft bows of beauty. She was both man and woman. Hard and soft. Divine and terrible. No one dared to cross Athena and with good reason. She is so fearsome in her wonder.
I watch her strong shoulders rise and fall. I watch her eyebrows tilt up in boredom. I watch her gray eyes locate an animal dying in the distance. I watch her sword hand twitch when she catches the scent of blood in the air...
She never stumbles. She never stutters. She never shows fear. She would never long for the touch of a lying husband. She would never be so silly to fall in love with someone who only saw her as a substitute for an unattainable prize.
I slump back against the tree and pull my black in cloak tightly around me.
Throw it away, my mother had told me when I first pulled the cloak from my room to wear once the weather shifted to chilly mornings and even colder nights. But I could not… it was warm and smelled of him and his sunless kingdom. One would think I'd be adverse to such a thing- but it brought me comfort instead.
"You are annoying." Athena tells Artemis, which makes her laugh.
The Old Ones on Olympus said Athena took everything that was good about Father Zeus with her when she sprung fully formed from one of his splitting headaches. She took his sense, his patience, and his logical mind. She even took half his heart, the part where affection and empathy dwells. They say all this under the cover of darkness when the Great Father can not hear them whisper, but I doubt he would find fault in such gossip because Athena is the only woman he ever truly saw as his equal and the only child he ever loved as a father should.
Mother said that if she truly took all of his best qualities, then there was something to be said to the fact that Athena was made woman and not man. But women have always been stronger in the only way that mattered, she was quick to explain.
So why is it not us who rule the world? I once asked. Because we are busy doing everything else, my mother answered.
"When do you return to the dead earth, Persephone?" Athena surprises me by asking as I make camp between two large tree roots that twist, and bend, and break into the ground. I pop my head above the root to give her a questioning look. "It is soon, is it not?"
She is the only one who doesn't speak to me gently about the topic. Athena deals in facts and the fact is I am to return to the dead earth. No sympathy. No thought of what awaits or what I may have endured.
"A week," I answer and I do not like the way my voice sounds, so I clear my throat. "With the rise of the full moon."
"You know..." she sighs and lifts her brows once more. "I have often wondered what kind of Queen I would be if I was given dominion over Here, There, or Below."
Artemis and I share a look and my curly haired sister gives me a dimpled smile to show her amusement.
"It surprises me that out of the three of us, it is you that was given the opportunity." My ears burn at the insult, but I bite back my reply because I am covered in mud and she is perfectly pure. I will never be pure again. "What do you suppose is the most important trait a Queen can possess?" she turns to ask the question of Artemis who seems a little taken aback to be singled out. "I would say courage... Courage, and strength, and—."
"Conning," Artemis cuts in before Athena can continue. She hops to her feet and throws her fur lined cloak over her shoulders, revealing the short dress underneath that is loose fitting and shows the band of cloth she wears around her breasts to keep them in place while running. "Conning, and poise, and freedom."
"Freedom is not a trait," Athena scowls as I turn my bag over to dump my leaf collection on the ground.
"Yes, it is."
I grab some twigs and start knotting a crown, using the leaves and even some mud to hold it all in place, only half listening to their fight.
"Freedom is given or freedom is taken... It is not something one can have for themselves."
"That's not true," I whisper and they both look at me as my nimble fingers work on my task. "There is a certain freedom of heart and mind that I find very appealing."
"You are the only one here who could claim the title of being Queen." Artemis points out, smirking because she thinks I took her side in the argument. "What do you suppose is most important?"
I think on it for a moment... I really think on it as I picture the kingdom down below with its dark court full of creatures and desperate souls seeking peace... and then my thoughts turn to the handsome king who rules them all with his pomegranate kisses.
"Kindness," I say gently after a long bout of silence.
"What did she say?" Athena asks with a brow raised.
"I think she said kindness," Artemis confirms as she creeps closer to the tree I am hiding behind. "Did you say kindness, Persephone?"
"Yes," I sit up on my knees and nod my head as they both stare me down. "I believe kindness is the greatest trait a queen can have."
Now it is their turn to share a look and I do not like what it means.
"Kindness is an easily exploited weakness in a ruler," Athena scolds me with a hand on her belt. "Just as it is the enemy of rational thought. Women are told to be kind from birth so they can be easily managed by the men in their lives. It is a trick."
"That's not true," I try to defend my answer as Artemis sits down on one of the twisted roots.
"Of course it is not," Artemis smiles at me and Athena huffs. "But kindness is reserved for those we love or who gain our favor. It is not something to be handed out to each undeserving soul."
"Without kindness there is Chaos," I say firmly, refusing to back down on my opinion.
"Without order there is Chaos," Athena corrects me. "Kindness has nothing to do with that."
"Kindness is civilized," I mutter, losing confidence with my argument.
"You are not one to speak of being civilized at this moment, sister," she says, giving me a once over to take in all the mud and debris covering me and my tattered dress. "You have always been too wild for your own good and a wild heart is where Chaos lurks."
"Chaos lurks in your ordered mind too," I tell her, feeling heated now. "You are not free of that darkness."
"Am I not?"
"Shall I ask the Gorgons about the darkness of your ordered mind?" I ask and Artemis sucks in a breath of surprise at my gumption because I have never been one for confrontation. "My mother told me about what you did to that poor mortal."
The look that passes over Athena's face surprises me. A series of emotions seem to flash in her eyes and it dawns on me all at once what that means.
"You regret your actions with the mortal Medusa?" I whisper, half in awe and half in confusion because for as long as I've known her, Mighty Athena has never been wrong about anything.
"Surely proud Athena regrets nothing at all," Artemis says, just to be troublesome as she digs her heels into the ground. "It is not logical to have such a feeling and we all know logic is the most important thing there is."
Athena is careful with her answer and she struggles with it before deciding it is best to glare at me instead.
"When Chaos comes knocking- there is no going back," she says, her voice a steady stream. "You can never undo what the darkness has done... even if you wanted to... even if you cried for it...Even if you begged... Let that be a lesson when you reside over your kingdom below, sister." She gives me a pointed look. "Be careful with that ancient call when it comes crawling up your throat."
She glares into the woods, troubled.
"Perhaps it is better for you to be kind, my sister. If I was to choose a queen to rule over me, it would be someone as sweet as you are," Artemis smiles as she pets my hair, trying to cool the situation with my wrathful sister by changing the subject.
She takes the leaf crown from my hands and places it on my head with a fond look shining in her brown eyes. Brown like the bear, and the stag, and the fowl that she held so dear. Artemis loves me. She always has and I am grateful for her affection.
"With someone as stern as Lord Hades, I am sure all those below are relieved to find your disposition so forgiving."
I don't like speaking of Lord Hades, and I slump against the tree at the thought of him.
"It is easy to be silly when you have a strong husband," Athena says with her eyes narrowed. Athena, on the other hand, has never loved me. Not even once. "But what if that husband is not there and you are left to rule on your own? A kingdom can easily be a queendom with just a slight of hand. Could you afford to be so nonsensical then?"
"I did not know having a strong husband gave you sway to be a nicer person," Artemis blinks in fake surprise and then she grins at me. "No one has told Mother Hera that news yet."
"No one has told Mother Hera what news?"
We all turn to find Mother Hera standing in all her glory by my mother's creek, wearing a dress of fine lavender silk. By her side is a green haired host of the sea, wearing a bronze crown and a glittering dress of see through fabric that's cinched at her waist with golden rope.
I have seen the wife of Lord Poseidon only once before, but one does not forget someone who looks as strange as she does.
"Nothing of importance," Artemis says nervously. "We were just speaking of Persephone's role as Queen in the dead earth and your name naturally came up."
"Naturally," she says with an unpleasant smile as she shares a look with the moss haired woman by her side. "I am disappointed to find you so entertained, Persephone. I thought you would be alone in Demeter's sacred wood this day...but here you are..."
She opens her arms, the long sleeves of her gown nearly touching the ground as she gestures to Artemis and Athena.
"Surrounded by such noble little godlings... all playing in the mud like children."
It is Athena who blushes at this insult, but she says nothing to defend herself. Instead she curls her hands into tight little fists.
"What brings you here?" I ask before realizing who I am speaking to. I stand up, fumbling with my cloak that gets stuck in the roots of the large tree. "Great Mother," I add for good measure when she lifts a dark eyebrow.
I tug my cloak so hard it rips and Artemis gives me a side eyed glare for it. Always so silly, her look seems to chastise me and I have to agree with her.
"I thought it was clear that I came for you," she says flatly, her eyes darting between my sisters before focusing on me and my crown of leaves. "I have invited you to every council meeting we've had this long summer, but your mother has declined each invitation… stating that you are still too fragile from your ordeal to meet with us."
She motions to Queen Amphitrite in her gossamer gown who smiles at me with large, fishy eyes gleaming.
"She has never understood the importance of a crown, you understand. She has never respected the ladder of responsibility. She is forever doing exactly as she pleases..."
She seems to have said more than she intended and she bites back her next words with her lips pressed together.
"But, of course, I did not come here to talk about your mother." She steps forward and glares at Athena. "You are dressed for war," she points out, blinking at my sister's armor and the shield she has propped against a nearby sycamore tree. "You have never been one for the wildernesses and I am sure you have places you would rather be. Perhaps while on the living earth you meant to visit your sacred city?"
"The city you took from my husband," the other queen finally speaks. Her voice is soft like a whisper and her teeth are pointed pearls behind purple tinted lips. "Do not fret," she is quick to say when Athena narrows her eyes. "I bear you no ill will. My husband has far too many things as it is. He needs no more."
"That is generous of you," Athena says, her voice full of venom.
"I am very charitable," Queen Amphitrite replies with a closed mouth smile, having caught her tone. "One of my better qualities, I assure you."
Lord Poseidon's wife is very thin. Not full bodied like me or my mother and not lean like Artemis or Athena...but thin in the way that young girls are thin... or young boys... with just a slight curve of her waist and breasts to show she is a woman…
"I have heard whispers of your involvement in the matter of a clayborn bastard, Athena." Mother Hera says. "I hear that you have sent a mortal to seek out the Western Maidens. Please, tell me you do not intend for him to steal from my sacred grove."
There was a clear warning in her voice. A wicked steeliness in her gaze. I lift the bottom of my cloak and trouble myself over the newly acquired hole.
"Anything taken- I will return," Athena answers and I share a confused look with Artemis. "My intentions are not to help the mortal, but to relieve the suffering of another. All will be as it was when the task is complete."
"Let us hope," Mother Hera nods her head in acceptance. "I would hate for us to be at odds."
"That is not a fight I wish for," Athena admits. After a short pause, she nods her head towards the Great Mother like they had an agreement. "I should take my leave, then."
She excuses herself and takes off past Mother Hera before ascending at the edge of the forest.
Artemis is next and, when Mother Hera levels her with a purple eyed glare, she is quick to gather her quiver and bow.
"I, too, have a place to be," she says quickly, sending me an apologetic look as she throws up the hood of her cloak. "I will see you soon, sister," she whispers to me as she grabs my shoulders and kisses my temple. "Be smart," she warns into my ear because she knows who she is leaving me with. "Speak carefully."
Once she is gone, Mother Hera stares at me for an uncomfortably long amount of time before finally speaking.
"You wear the midnight cloak of the underworld," she points out. "Why?"
"I… " I don't dare tell her the truth. Instead I shrug.
"I have always hated the colors he chose." She says, a sharp brow raised as her large eyes settle on the silver clasp at my throat. "So dark and dreary." It's the head of a screech owl - made of woven silver and gold. She reaches a long, pale finger out to touch it's emerald eyes. "I suppose that is fitting because he is also so dark and dreary."
She waits for me to reply but when I don't- she steps back and folds her hands into her sleeves.
"I was of the understanding that Lord Hades was not a good husband to you. Yet here I find you wearing his color and one of his favors? What a strange thing that is."
"Strange, indeed," the other queen says- a queer smile on her face like the monsters that dwell in the deepest abyss.
"I want to see all of this place my sister finds so pleasing," Mother Hera says as she takes my arm and pulls me roughly against her. I am bigger than her, but she has a mother's crushing strength. She begins walking us, her grip on me ever so tight. "I had grand hopes for you joining our little group," she states as the sun breaks through the trees, freckling her dark hair with light and making it shine.
A bird calls a warning over head and I snap my neck to see, but Mother Hera digs her nails into my skin.
"The Council of Three Queens I was to call it." She continues through gritted teeth. Her ox eyes giving me a bitter warning to pay attention.
"Such a wonderful name, Mother Hera," Queen Amphitrite says and I glance at her over my shoulder while Mother Hera rubs the sting of her violence away from my arm. "Inspired, really."
She smiles at me like we were in on a joke together and I abruptly look away.
"Your mother has made it sound like our brother has ravaged you beyond repair….but that is not all together true, is it?"
She stops walking.
"Is it?" She repeats, a little more sternly. Her grip on my arm tightens again. "Lord Hades has never been a violent host and I have it under good authority that you thrived in your position below and very nearly enjoyed yourself."
I blush at her meaning and look down at my muddy feet.
"Hades fancied himself in love with you too, I'd wager. He tries to hide it- but he yearns for companionship. He has been alone for a very long time, you understand."
She must know it is not my companionship he yearns for.
"I doubt he thought someone like you would ever reject him. And to do so in front of so many…." She clicks her tongue at me. "Men are such fools, of course," she sighs. "They always expect us to be grateful for their attention."
"Why are you here, Mother Hera?" I ask. I pry myself away from her grasp and take a step back. "Have you come to ask something of me?"
She stares at me. Her eyes are beautiful. Large and the palest purple, framed with black lashes.
"You look very much like your mother," she says, reaching out to touch a strand of my hair. "And very much like My Zeus. Half of me wants to rip off your entire face and the other half wants to kiss you."
She smiles unpleasantly.
"I want you to understand something," she says as she begins curling my hair around her finger. "Lord Hades is your husband and your King. Now and forever after." She wraps it around tighter and tighter…. "The Oath Flame seared the promises into your body. I see them now- burning under your skin."
"You're hurting me," I whisper as she yanks on my hair.
"The vows you took are sacred to me, did you know that? Even those of the light are held accountable to such an oath."
She untangles her fingers from my hair and I take another cautious step back, rubbing the pain away with my palm.
"You belong to Lord Hades now. As I belong to Father Zeus and she belongs to Lord Poseidon. We are beholden to our husbands as they are meant to be beholden unto us. Do you understand?"
I do not reply and her jaw tightens in anger.
"Say it."
"Say what?" I ask.
"Say that you belong to Lord Hades. You need to realize that."
I furrow my brows and then look at Queen Amphitrite who is giving me a curious kind of smile.
"Lord Hades is my husband. It is true… but I belong only to myself."
He lifts her brow again. She is angry, agitated. It was a stupid thing to say.
"You think Demeter doesn't believe that you belong to her?" She asks sharply. "You must belong to someone, of course. If it is not your husband then it is your mother. If it is not your mother then it must be your father…. and that is something I will not suffer."
"I am..." I struggle with my words because I find Mother Hera so intimidating. She was an ancient warrior- hard and unforgiving- but she also had a Great Mother's glowing warmth and the two struggled against each other in her divine heart. "I am my own person."
Of course, I am.
"That is Demeter talking through you," she says in annoyance. "She is just like them, you know. Our brothers take what they want- whenever they want- and Demeter is the same way. She is forever doing as she pleases and never suffers the consequences. She is controlling, demanding, and disrespectful. She has never had to compromise like we have had to compromise.
She pauses for a moment.
"She will never understand," she says gently. For a moment, she was a Great Mother full of empathy and love. "She will never understand how you could hate Lord Hades but still think of how full he made you feel when he was inside you. She will never know of your secret smiles or deep desires to be loved and had by him. She doesn't understand those things because the only thing Demeter has ever loved is you and, to her, you will only ever be a child."
Her words are thick and hard to swallow... but I know there is truth to them.
"Lord Hades saw the woman in you and made you his queen. Your place is by his side- not here, hiding behind your mother's skirts in this secluded wood."
"He stole me away and tricked me," I say carefully, so she will understand. "He lied to me… Kept things hidden." I explain so she will see. "These are slights I can not forget."
"Who said you have to forget them?" she asks sharply.
When I don't answer, she tilts her chin up. Her features are so lovely and well formed. With pale skin, dark hair, and glittering eyes- she was Lord Hades in female form and I found myself wanting her too.
"You think I have not been slighted?" she asks softly as I shake away the desire. "There is much misery in my eternal life, but I have never broken. Not once. I never will. I was forged of steel and fire."
Steel and fire.
"And what are you made of, Queen Persephone?" She asks. "My husband may not be as I want him to be- but he is still my king and my husband. My door is always unlocked to him should he find his way back."
I look away, embarrassed.
"And your husband may not be as you want him to be either-but he is still your husband and he is still your king. He has shown great restraint with you. If I ever dared to talk against Zeus as you have Hades…" she stops herself from saying what would befall her. "And if I ever dared leave my throne as you have left yours… I shudder to think what Father Zeus would do to me. You are lucky Lord Hades is not up here mounting you every night so you remember that you are his queen and no longer the sheltered maiden you pretend to be."
Chaos simmers just under the surface of her skin. It calls to me as the anger creeps its way up her throat. Was she jealous? Jealous of my defiance and the love my mother has for me? Jealous of the space Lord Hades has granted me? Her song calls onto mine and I hear its bitter melody so clearly.
"No matter their indiscretions- they have chosen us. Claimed us…. given us their crowns. Though they may stray- it is us they have decided upon."
The look on my face must say something… because she laughs unpleasantly.
"You think Lord Hades does not find affection elsewhere?" She smiles at the other Queen who laughs. "Trust me. He has and will again. Though Hades has never been as lustful as my other brothers- he still has a man's needs… a man's brain. They think of only one thing - and that is where they can plant their seed next. Men were made so simple, were they not?"
The thought bothers me more than it should. I look away and try to rid myself of it. I would never be unfaithful to him, of course. I had no desire to complicate the matter more. But why should I expect the same of him? Especially after what I have done…
"You will say it now," she says as she grabs my hands to get my attention again. "And you will mean it."
"I…" I hesitate a moment and try to pull my hands away- but she holds firm. Her eyes are predatory and old. Her hands wrapped around mine, punishing and unyielding. "I belong to Lord Hades."
"Say it again and mean it."
I lick my lips nervously and look down. How could I mean it? What did it mean to belong to someone, anyways?
"I belong to Lord Hades."
I belong to Lord Hades.
"Yes." She says, satisfied. "You do."
She pulls me to her and begins our walk again.
"What they won't tell you is that Lord Hades belongs to you too. You can make him burn."
"Burn?" I ask, confused.
"Yes, and that is where you are useful to me. There is much good we can do between Hades and Zeus."
I look towards the other queen. She smiles again, her skin sparkles in the sunshine- a beautiful bluish hue.
"Not Poseidon," Mother Hera pulls my attention back to her. "He is hard headed and will not listen to anyone… but Zeus has been known to change his mind and Hades…." She gives me a thoughtful look. "He always… favored Demeter…. and for a very long time, he always did what she asked of him. He will do the same for you if you play him right."
The mention of my mother and Lord Hades' relationship makes me think of the words of bitter Aphrodite. Words I had tried not to think on because they upset me so.
"I wish for us to be friends," she says as she turns to me and pushes my hair over my shoulders. "We are destined to be great allies, of course." Her fingers play with the owl at my throat. "The land of Hades has never had a queen."
"Is there something you wish for me to do?" I ask carefully.
"Not yet," she says with a sly smile as she lets her hand drop to mine, taking it gently. "But I am sure I will call upon you soon."
"Well, there is something she could help with, Queen Hera."
They look at one another as Queen Amphirite steps forward. Her webbed fingers take my free hand so they are both holding on to me.
The Council of Three Queens.
"The Great Father wishes to make Perseus immortal. If he survives his trials," the moss haired queen says, looking at Mother Hera with her fishy eyes black as night. "My Lord Husband refuses to deify any of Father Zeus' mortal born children. He says it's the principle of the matter, but I am sure it is because of some ancient slight."
"Yes," Mother Hera looks away for a moment before wetting her lips and looking at me with eyes narrowed. "That choice is always up to Lord Hades."
"Why is it his decision?" I ask, confused. "Can Father Zeus not do as he likes?"
"No." Mother Hera answers. "It is Lord Hades who must retrieve the elixir of eternal life. It resides below his kingdom. In the deep dark wet of the river of fire. At the very heart of the pitch black prison of smoke and ash where the before gods toil in their prison. It is not an easy journey- so Lord Hades decides and he has always… always… sided with Zeus."
The deep dark wet.
"If you can convince your husband to deny Perseus immortality- I will see that as a great favor," the queen mother says, putting her other hand on top of mine to hold it more completely. "I am sure a great love will blossom between us and you will become a most trusted sister of ours."
How could I tell her that I had no intention of speaking to Lord Hades, let alone ask any favors of him?
"He won't listen to me," I say instead. "Especially now."
"Of course he will," Queen Amphitrite says. "You need only give him what he wants."
"I don't know what he wants."
"Don't you?" Mother Hera asks. "He wants what all men want."
She brings my hand up and kisses my knuckles. Her lips are soft and full of poison.
"Remember who you belong to now," she whispers as she lets me go. "And remember who belongs to you. Make him burn."
Burn.
With that she leaves. I watch her ascend before turning to Queen Amphitrite.
"I don't know what she means by that," I say honestly and she smirks, her mouth too large and her teeth too sharp.
"You will."
She doesn't elaborate and I don't ask. I watch the strange host walk towards one of my mother's oak trees and she runs her fingers up the bark.
"Mother Gaia is loud here." she whispers. "Hydro is but a whisper in my kingdom. His song has turned quite melancholy lately."
Her large eyes look into mine, but I can only see myself reflected back within their depths.
"Is Mother Gaia sad too?"
"I don't believe so," I say honestly. "Her song is as it always was."
"But you are sad," she points out, her head tilted. "You really do not want to return to him, do you?"
My thoughts on the matter were more complicated than a straight yes or no answer, but I shake my head anyways.
"I understand your distress, Queen Persephone. Believe me. You and I are more alike than you could ever know. These husbands of ours can be callously dismissive of our wants and desires- but I must always remind myself that they are unwell."
"Unwell?" I repeat as she plucks a leaf off of a nearby tree.
She runs it over her purple lips.
"My husband dreams of the darkness and wakes screaming for his mother," she answers. "What does Lord Hades dream about, I wonder?"
"He doesn't dream," I whisper, staring as she tastes the leaf with the pointed tip of her black tongue. "He says he does not sleep at all anymore."
"Perhaps that's for the best," she answers as she crunches up the leaf and lets it fall to the ground. "Our husbands have had a lifetime of torture and it has made them... What's the word?" She squints at the sun and it takes her a moment to find it as she circles her hand in the air. "Ah, yes. It has made them troubled and it has given them never ending nightmares to fight against."
Troubled. That is a kind way to describe them, indeed.
"Arion fast approaches," she says after a moment, changing the subject. "Have you heard him?"
Arion?
"My brother?" I say in surprise. "Why would he come here?"
I only met my horse brother once, and it was when I was still a child. He was large- incredibly large- and glittered gold in the sun. I remember his eyes shined like diamonds and smoke rolled from his nostrils.
I was scared of him then.
"I suppose to see you," she says with a shrug. "Beloved of Demeter. Beloved of Hades…. Beloved of Zeus."
Zeus was my father, but he did not love me, which I told her so and she laughed.
"Zeus loves all beauty," she replies, fish eyes sparkling. "He does not understand the complexities of it, but he loves it all the same and one day it will be his downfall."
"You shouldn't say such things," I whisper uncomfortably.
"Perhaps I should not," she says, smirking. "Arion can run through the water just as fast as he can run on land. He is so swift. My King Husband is quite fond of him… he is a beautiful beast and it is a shame that your mother did not nurture him as she did you." She makes a strange little face. "Though, I guess I can not blame her- the way my husband tricked her… " She shakes her head. "In any case, Arion has not been in this country for many years. Please give him my regards when you see him."
She leaves me then and I look at the creek as I ponder Hydros and Gaia and all the ancient ones who came before….
There is a war coming… Athena had said. Can my sisters not feel it too?
I do sense something coming, but it is not a war. It is my brother. He gallops through the woods, shaking the forest floor and the trees above. With one thought repeating in his mind.
Sister.
Sister.
Sister.
XXX
Sometimes he calls me little sister.
Which is true in a couple ways.
Arion is the largest horse who ever lived and he is also older than me by two centuries. Long ago, Lord Poseidon had made a horse for my mother to woo her with a striking beauty. It did not work, but Arion was that beauty perfected by his deception of her more than a decade later.
He can not speak- not truly. Being of godly blood, his mind can send thoughts- but they are just simple words or bursts of emotions.
When I asked him what he wanted, he answered- Nothing.
When I asked him why he came all this way, he answered- Sister.
Mother did not seem very pleased to see him, though she did show him affection when he bent down to greet her by petting his shining mane and running her fingers down his golden nose.
She can understand him better than I can and they spoke at length in our hidden home while I waited outside, picking burrs off the side of a fox who was unfortunate enough to encounter a bush full of them.
When they reappeared, Mother seemed annoyed but she smiled at me anyways.
"Arion wishes to be your companion until..." she never liked admitting I would have to leave her. "Until you must go."
"Why?" I asked, puzzled.
"He claims Mother Gaia told him to."
"Mother Gaia spoke to him directly?"
She never spoke to anyone. She just sang in poetry and riddles.
Mother sighed. "He says that she did, and he has no capacity to lie, so I believe him."
And that was it.
Arion became my companion for the last week of my time on earth and I preferred his company to the nymphs my mother used to send. He rarely speaks… sometimes he will point out that something is lovely, or he'll tell me if something reminds him of his travels….One peculiar thing he says on occasion is -snake in the garden- but I have yet to understand what that means.
He lets me ride on his back and sometimes he speaks of our other sister- the daughter born of the union between his father and my mother. She is not a horse, he says. She looks kind of like me, but she is older and much more wary of the world.
Solitude, he explained when describing her to me. Deep rivers, he answered when I asked where she lived.
Rage, he said, but never explained that either and I did not press him further.
On this, my last day on the living earth, I have promised to show him my favorite place. The first sign of morning frost settles upon the grass, hinting towards the winter to come as we walk up the hillside that overlooks all of Mother's sacred woods. The sun is rising and the entire world smells new and fresh with possibilities.
Beautiful, he says to the sight of the colorful trees in the distance.
He is right, I have never seen the forest look so lovely before. Mother has truly made this season something to admire.
Beautiful, he repeats.
I smile at him but turn away to hide my face when the realization of my circumstances washes over me. This is the last of the living earth I will see for half the year and Mother Gaia does not sing. Her voice is buried too deep now and it pains me to find her gone on my last day of freedom. I straighten my spine as I stand with Arion on the hill top, staring at the world below while I contemplate my fate and ready myself for the night to come.
I am not afraid, I tell myself. I was forged of steel and fire.
But why am I so nervous?
The North Wind blows particularly hard and I squint up at the clouds as she rolls overhead... calling to her sisters with twirls and giggles as I lift my hood to block her.
Mother is on Olympus again, pleading one last time with Great Father Zeus to risk destruction for my sake, but I know her pleas are in vain because there is no comfort in this world to be had. I will go below, and for half the year I will be in the darkness with the dead and the creatures that thrive in decay.
And I will be brave about it. I will be brave, noble, and kind…
Scared?
Arion is looking at me with his diamond eyes and I shake my head at his question.
I am not scared. Not of Lord Hades, anyways. I am scared of my future and what it will bring… and….and maybe I do fear Lord Hades…I would be stupid not to. He is a Great Father. The King of the Dead and all that dwell below. He fought the mighty Titans and has them now chained below his halls. He is the unseen one. The coming darkness. The last judgment…
I've already made my thoughts on the matter known to all the hosts above and I am sure he heard them too.
Thoughts come to me now that I did not entertain before. I do not know what kind of husband I will be going home to. I do not know if Chaos has blackened his heart towards me because of the decree I made on Olympus. I know I have been angry and raged at him for the words of Aphrodite, but the time spent in the sun has made me soft again.
What if he is angry with me?
Give him what he wants.
The other Queen's words come to me then, but I can't pretend. Not if what he wants goes against everything I want.
I belong to Lord Hades.
My breath is coming out in panicked gasps now that I've worked myself up and Arion gently nudges me with his muzzle.
Lord Hades belongs to me.
"I lied," I tell him, looking into his diamond eyes. "I am scared. I should not be scared," I lick my lips, they are impossibly dry. "I should be brave."
Why?
He doesn't explain what he wants answered, but in my distress, I have failed to block out the prayers of mortals. One voice cuts through my mind above all others. It is piercing in its intensity- the sharpest of blades.
"Please!"
It's a woman and the power of her prayer makes me wince in pain.
"Please! Do not take them away from me!"
Arion says something, but the woman's cries have flooded my body, making me fall to my knees as they pound against my skull.
"Have mercy! Have mercy! Have mercy!"
Arion can hear her now too and he bends down so I can climb on his back.
"Please!" She cries as I mount Arion and wrap arms around his neck. "I'm sorry!"
Arion senses where she is and takes off in that direction.
Thebes.
My horse brother is swift and we reach the man-made city in no time at all. It is hidden by a thick fog that rolls in from the neighboring mountains and Arion tilts his head curiously as I slide off his back and stare up at the gates. I try to tame my wild hair by tying it into a messy braid with a white ribbon given to me by Artemis that she claimed came from Great Mother Rhea.
Silence, he says and he is right- the sun is high and a city this large should be bustling with life.
"It is strange," I say, veiling myself so I can find the source of the prayer.
Arion stays close behind. Human eyes can behold his wonder without perishing, but it wouldn't matter anyway because all of the occupants of Thebes are frozen in place. They stand like statues or like the unmoving paintings on a vase.
A young girl stands near us, her pale hair moving with the wind- but her body is still. Her hands are up as if to shield herself from something above and I glance up at the swirling gray clouds and wonder what she saw.
Cronus Curse, Arion whispers and I agree.
It did seem like a curse of the titan of time, but he was chained so far below the earth there was no chance of him ever doing such a deed. But there was no question that this was the work of the divine.
I reach my hand out and touch the young girl's cheek. Her mind is silent but her soul shakes inside her chest.
"She was frightened by what befell her city," I say as I step back. "I can smell the fear on her."
Revelry. Arion says as we walk further into the city.
He is right. It looks like they were in the middle of some kind of celebration. Colorful banners made of wool and silk hang from each open window and most of the occupants are dressed in light green linen with their faces painted white.
Musicians are frozen in place with instruments still in hand. Dancers are stuck in odd positions before them with their hair and breasts free. Bakers are in the act of throwing bread into the crowd and waiting hands reach upwards to catch the braided loaves that are already rock hard and molded on the ground.
A wooden statue sits in the city square covered in dried flowers and laurels. It is of the Titan Leto, holding her sacred rooster.
"Please!" The woman calls, breaking the silence, and my neck snaps towards the temple at the center of town. "You can not do this to me!"
We walk past the mortals stuck in their fleshy prisons and make our way to the temple. Dedicated to the holiness of Great Zeus, the building is white marble with towering columns and a domed roof covered in gold. All the red robed priests are outside. They cower on their hands and knees as if in frightful prayer.
I give Arion a troubled look and he shakes his magnificent head.
Death, he says. No.
He does not want to go in and I can't blame him- I can smell the decay too. I leave him in the courtyard and I walk up the marble steps into the temple's great hall where a woman shrouded in black is huddled in the middle of the room
Incense burns…. smoke curling into the air… but it can not hide the stench of death. It hits me like a wall and I cover my mouth when I find it so distasteful, instantly repealed by what it means.
The living woman is haunting in her distress.
Tears have smudged her charcoal lined eyes, leaving messy trails down her white painted cheeks. Her draped dress is a dark, emerald green and she has mother's milk stains at her breasts. Engorged and inflamed- I can smell the infection in the air just as I can smell her body's filth.
On her head rests a golden crown and in her arms she holds a dead infant, his soul whimpering inside his chest.
"Please!" Her prayer shouts but her cracked lips don't move.
The sun shines in through slits in the wall, falling across the room in a thousand little slivers that reveal the great tragedy that has held this entire city hostage. The large statue of Father Zeus looms in the background- twenty feet tall and covered in riches. His unseeing eyes bear witness to this great betrayal.
There are fifteen dead bodies and fifteen souls waiting to be heard. Their soft cries whisper through the air, begging for release. They are mostly children and I can see the poisoned arrows of the Gods sticking from their rotting corpses.
Seven boys... Seven girls... and a father with his throat slashed open.
"Please!"
I walk towards the mother and kneel before her. She has wrapped herself in a black woolen shawl as if to keep out the cold and she shivers with my approach.
The child in her arms is not yet a year and I place my hand on his forehead to calm him. The shade inside settles at my touch and I feel a great sadness within me as I look him over. His body is oddly disjointed and his skin is nearly green in places… he has been dead for days and a golden arrow with red feathers is sticking out of his right eye.
I recognize it instantly and my heart drops into my stomach.
Apollo.
I glance at the others as I pull my hand back. The realization of what transpired here washes over me as I stare at the arrow embedded into the bloated toddler nearby. Silver like the moon with the white feathers of a dove. Delicate, and feminine, and deadly…
Artemis.
Shadows begin creeping from their hidden spots along the walls and I stand with their approach. They bring with them an odd ticking noise of the other place as they slink and slither towards the dead. I watch as they form and take shape, standing beside each corpse, seeming to wait for a command.
"There is a rather large horse outside that claims to know you."
I turn at the voice to see Thanatos standing in the doorway, his great wings dark and menacing in the daylight and his black armor shining brilliantly. Thanatos is death... My mother told me and here death stood before me with a band of black spikes and rubies resting on his head... Death is a shadow...
"He says he doesn't like death, which I think is actually quite rude of him to say."
I can not answer his light hearted banter- I am too upset. He notices, and gives me a sad half smile.
"Apollo and Artemis have no mercy," he says as he approaches. "Such savagery your brother and sister have wrought," he smiles, his swirling gray eyes impish in delight.
"Artemis could not do this," I say, deciding this must have been by Apollo alone. I touch the white ribbon in my hair, thinking of my beloved sister. "She would not..."
"She would and she has."
He comes close and his darkly painted hand rubs his lips in that weird way that he has.
"And we all know how testy our kind can be."
I refuse to believe that, but he hardly cares.
"It only took a few seconds to murder them all, so swiftly their arrows flew." He lifts his arms and pretends to be holding a bow, making a whistling noise with his mouth as he shoots one of his fake arrows towards a young girl with braids. She is laying face down with half her body red from the pooling of her blood. "Perhaps I should stay longer," he admits when he sees the mother fall to her side. "It seems like she means to follow her family into our halls."
"Why?" I whisper as the souls shake once more. "Why did they do this?"
"Why wouldn't they?" he questions with a shrug. "The hosts of Olympus are malicious creatures, watching each corner of the world for slights to punish. It is an awful thing to live forever... so bored they all become when they have never known my touch…" he eyes me for a moment. "…and what a sweet touch it can be."
He smiles at the thought before walking towards the dead king and hopping on the empty podium by his side.
"This one killed himself," he nods to the father who lays prone at Great Zeus' stone feet, the dagger he used to slit his own throat lays bloodied on the floor. "I can not decide if the madness caused by grief is a blessing or a curse."
"I can not see how something like this could ever be justified," I whisper and he watches me for a few tense moments. "Leto is a goddess of motherhood and a keeper of children. Why do this during her festival?"
"It was a mother's pride that caused this tragedy," he says gently, like he wanted to shield me from the awful truth. "Hubris. The most damning sin of them all."
"What did she do?" I ask carefully as Thanatos sits back and crosses his legs.
"Does it matter?" he asks with his head tilted. "Would the outcome of her words make this any less shocking?" He waits for an answer, but when I do not give one, he smiles. "Does motive determine forgiveness in cases like this?"
I think about that for a moment before shaking my head.
"Must you take them below?" I ask as the buzz of their souls becomes louder still. "Can you not wake them from their slumber and reverse this wrong?"
"The body has already failed. Do you wish for him to stay like this until he grows old?" Thanatos asks as he nods to the little boy in his mother's arms. So awful a fate he's been given... "He will not heal from these wounds. The damage has been done to both body and soul. It would be cruel to let him linger and remain in pain all his days. I have already waited long enough… I thought, perhaps, your siblings would have mercy, but it seems they have moved on with other pleasures."
He looks around with a sigh, his bold eyebrows falling into a thoughtful line.
"They will be reborn," I say, half in question as I blink up at him.
"There are no children in the land of Hades," he says seriously. "Unless you and our Great King bless our halls with one, we will never see a young one stay in our land without being instantly sent back to live again. One of our better rules," he admits. "But the oldest was seventeen," he nods to the boy, a handsome faced youth with golden hair. "Then this set of twins were sixteen." He motions to a set of identical girls entertwined in death. "And this curly headed boy was fifteen..."
"That is still so young," I say and he tilts his head.
"Perhaps, but old enough to marry, bare children… fight in war…" he sighs. "But that is for our King to decide…. Or Queen," he adds with a smirk. "That is, if they make it across the river... They have not been buried or burned for days. I doubt they will receive the proper funerary rites to pass through our gates in this city of fog."
"We could bury them," I offer. "You and I."
He stares at me, the storm clouds gathering in his eyes. "That would be a great kindness, My Queen," he says, bowing his head. "But perhaps it is time to show the hosts who live above who you are."
"They know who I am."
"Do they?" He asks like he knew my answer was wrong. "You are the Queen of the Dead. Artemis and Apollo have not shown reverence to you or our King by these actions. They are allowed their rage- but not the disrespect. A Queen should not clean up the mess of others. If you do not honor the task you've been given- they will never honor it either."
He lifts his darkly painted hand and snaps his fingers.
One of the shadows begins moving, twisting and turning before pushing a black fist into the dead king's chest. With much force he yanks out a ball of light that takes the shape of its owner, only gray skinned and ashen faced like the dead below.
"They took my boy," the king's voice trembles in despair. He looks confused and he keeps blinking, staring between his broken corpse and the body of his oldest son. "My golden boy."
"Take him below," Thanatos turns to one of the shadows and winks. "Do it quickly."
The shadow pulls the king underground and then Thanatos says something else... a command in a language I don't understand. It causes the other shadows to do the same to the children. Their souls form and have time to look around before they are taken to my husband's kingdom. The baby is last and I go to him as his soul sits beside his mother, looking around curiously before he finds me.
His arms reach up and I lift him.
I have never held a baby before. Younger souls have more color than the older ones and I can see he has blonde hair and one brown eye- the other is an angry hole where Apollo's arrow killed him.
"His name is Castas," Thanatos says. "His twin was born breathless and has already been washed and reborn. I carried him down myself."
The baby plays with the clasp of my cloak as the shadow waits by our side.
"He would have been an orator," I whisper, seeing it now with divine eyes. "He had a gift for it. And poetry," I say, looking back at Thanatos with a sad smile. "He has Apollo's light shining within him."
"Yet, it was Apollo who killed him," Thanatos says.
"Yes," I look back at the child and I run my fingers down his soft cheek.
I feel Thanatos' thunderstorm eyes staring at me so I spare him a little glance.
His usual sardonic expression has softened.
"Can I let you in on a secret?" He asks, coming close and taking the baby from my arms. His hands it off to the shadow who twists and turns into the earth below.
The mother seems to feel the void and she starts howling. She claws at her clothes, scratching angry red lines down her face before she stands and runs out of the temple.
We watch her go.
"Nothing of light can grow in the dead earth." He says, getting my attention once more. "To plant such a seed in such soil…it must be under Great Helios."
Such a seed in such soil.
"Do you understand?" He asks. "Lord Hades is our King, but he was not born in the darkness like we were. He is like you."
He is like you.
"That is why he has fathered no children. The dead earth rejects the idea. He will have to step into the sun."
I look away- uncomfortable.
A new kind of creature creeps out from the shadows, he is hunched backed and his skin is a very deep midnight blue. He has cloudy white eyes and is completely naked but his back and arms are covered in oily black feathers.
"Who is that?" I ask as he moves towards the oldest son, his teeth bared, and his wrinkled face set in a grim line.
He is of our kind- but I know him not.
"One of the hosts of our great and fearsome kingdom," Thanatos says dryly. "He is Eurynomos." I make a disgusted face when he takes a bite out of the boy's arm. "Eater of corpses."
"He eats the rotted flesh of man?"
I have to turn away, it is an awful thing to behold and goes against all warnings in men and hosts.
Thanatos shrugs. "It looks like he does," he muses. "If they are not buried or burned...You can order him to stop." He glances at me as the godling makes a slurping sound. "You and Lord Hades are the only hosts who can command anything of him because he has sworn allegiance only to you. He has no particular fondness for Great Father Zeus and will not heed him."
He gives me another furtive glance.
"In fact, that is true for all of us below. We are beholden only to our King… and Queen." He smirks. "Father Zeus thought he deserved heaven and all its pleasures but he will never know the kind of allies that dwell in the darkness. Let us hope he never has to find out."
When I say nothing, he moves in front of me as if to shield me from the sight of the creature eating the body of the slain boy.
"This is where I leave you," he says, taking my hands and bringing them up to his lips, pressing wet kisses to my knuckles. "Many souls to reap this day, you understand. This is the season of death."
"Every season is the season of death," I reply as I tug my hands from his.
"How right you are," he whispers before spreading his wings and running towards one of the open windows. He takes flight, causing a shadow to fall over the hall as he turns and twists through one of the slivers in the wall. I am left with nothing but the rotting flesh of the dead and the godling that feasts.
A rage starts bubbling my blood.
Artemis.
My beloved sister.
Murderer of children.
I close my eyes and clench my fists in an attempt to subdue my anger… to bite back the simmering Chaos that has rooted itself in my heart since the day I declared winter on Mt Olympus.
I go to the baby, and pull Apollo's arrow from his eye. I go to the bloated toddler that has frothy blood coming from her mouth and ears and I pull my sister's arrow from her neck.
"My Queen."
I turn to the one called Eurynomos. He is standing now and he sinks to one knee when I give him my attention. His voice is like the haunting creek of a wooden door and his ears are pointed.
"You are greatly missed below," he looks up once, cloudy eyes large and bug like. "I am honored to be in your presence, beloved of Our Dreaded Lord Hades."
"Why…" I glance at the body he's been eating. "Why do you do that?"
"I was born with a hunger for my task," he answers. "I was made for this- just like you were made for yours."
My task? What is my task, anyways?
"Do you like to do it?" I ask.
He seems confused by the question, but I give him no time to answer.
"Leave them and feast no more," I command. "They will be buried by my sister and brother and I wish for them to be intact."
The creature nods his head and goes to say something, but I can not hear him. With a sudden sting, I feel the whisper of a pomegranate promise.
Now is the time... the voice hisses. I can taste the bitter fruit in my mouth. Now is the hour…
The sun sets in the distance, coloring the sky pink. How long have I been here? Time is wicked in this place and I must return to my mother. I dismiss myself from the godling Eurynomos to make my way out of the misty city of stone. I hop on Arion's back with the blood tipped arrows clenched tightly in my hand.
Arion says nothing as he takes off until he finds our mother. She is waiting for me in the meadow of my abduction, looking distressed.
"There you are."
She doesn't even chastise me, instead she pulls me into a tight hug and I can tell she's been crying.
Arion dismisses himself.
Till spring, he says.
"Till spring," I confirm, waving him off with a kiss.
"What is this?" Mother asks, one arm still around me as she touches the arrows.
"A tragedy," I say and she sees it- the rage of Chaos boiling my blood.
It's taking over me. The rage is all consuming.
"Yes," she whispers carefully, running a gentle hand down my arm to cool my temper. "Yes, of course."
She presses her forehead to mine and grabs my free hand, squeezing it tightly.
"Take a deep breath, My Love," she whispers with a mother's warmth. "You mustn't let the void eclipse you."
I do as she says and then I exhale slowly.
"Again," she whispers, breathing with me. "Chaos lurks in our hearts," she says. "It always has and it always will. But we must never let it win. Push it to the back of your mind and lock it there forever after. All it has ever caused is pain and regret.
She kisses my forehead when she senses I am myself once more.
We stand in perfect silence for a while before she asks me if I would like to change my dress. I tell her I would not. There is no point in dressing up for where I'm going.
My mother wears yellow- she refuses to wear anything darker on this day -and she offers to do my hair but I refuse that too. I will return to the dead earth as wild and dirty as the first time I was taken.
Now is the time…. Now is the hour….
"Lord Hades calls me," I tell her when I feel a feverish pull to retreat into the ground. "He is becoming impatient."
She presses her mouth in a thin line before pretending to smile.
"Hecate has volunteered to be your companion in your descent," she says as we start our journey to Eleusis- where the opening to the dead earth waits for me. "Her birthright gives her a pass to walk in the land of Hades freely, so you will not be without a friend."
Now is the time... Now is the hour…
The pull in my heart distracts me and makes me feel ill. My mother keeps talking over my distress as the voice whispers the same words over and over again... getting louder with each turn.
Now is the time…
We walk through the forest, through my mother's sacred wood and past the clay cities that follow. We walk towards the mountains and pass a great river until we reach the opening of the deep cave that will bring me below.
Now is the hour…
The voice will not leave me and I barely see my sisters and companions gathered round, giving me gifts for my journey below. Each of them holds the lighted torch of Hecate with the full moon an odd orange color at their backs.
Now is the time…
Nymphs hand me flowers and trinkets they have made from the earth...
Now is the hour…
Leada hands me a set of golden earrings in the shape of ravens...
Now is the time…
Athena hands me a tapestry that tells of the oncoming spring and a fine gown of blue silk, woven by her own hands...
Now is the hour...
Hestia hands me a glowing vial to soothe the pain of womanhood and a calming balm to use when I find myself in despair...
Now is the time...
Artemis hands me a handsome dagger with a leather sheath that she tells me can pierce even immortal flesh…
In return, I show her the arrows.
"What?" She seems puzzled for a moment before she swallows the bitter shame when she realizes what I have seen.
Now is the hour…
"You will free the city," I tell her, my voice frosty and without love. I swallow the void, letting the anger be my own. "You and your brother will bury the children—"
"What?" She says again, incredulous that I would command anything of her.
"You and your brother will bury the children you killed in Thebes and give them the proper funeral rights."
"Father Zeus told us—"
"You and your brother," I repeat, my voice amplified and multiplied. I feel as though I'm growing, towering over Artemis with my rage. "Will bury the children you killed in Thebes and give them proper funeral rights. If I find any one of them languishing on the bank of my river, I will send my furies after you and Apollo. Neither of you will know peace until you do as I have said."
She is silent. They all are. I can feel their surprised stares burning into my face.
"They are made from clay," she starts, like it explains the cruelty we reap upon them.
"They are made of light," I tell her. "Our light. You were wrong, sister," I tell her, thrusting the arrows at her chest "You know that and now you will make it right."
She stares at me with the blush of embarrassment coloring her cheeks. The familiar eyes she had loved for so long show her no warmth now and she thinks about it for a stubborn moment before nodding her head.
A very relieved exhale leaves the other women around us.
My mother is last.
She is troubled by my new voice and by my demands. Once, there was a time I never demanded anything of anyone and she is unsure what that means for her.
"Mother?" the sound of my true voice touches her heart.
She hugs me tight and kisses my cheeks, my nose, my forehead. My heart also softens under her affection and I melt into her embrace.
"Remember who you are," she whispers, her divine eyes glittering with tears. "Remember all I've told you..."
Now is the time...
"It will not be long until we see each other again," she says, giving me a brave smile as she wraps her hands around my arms. "I count the days until we are reunited and I will right this travesty that should never have come to pass. I promise you that."
Now is the hour…
"Our winter will be cruel," she adds, running her fingers down my face as the pull in my chest tugs harder than ever before. There is sweat at my temples. I feel feverish and sick. "So all will know what he has done."
"Now is the time..." I say out loud as Hecate steps near with her saffron cape and shadowed dogs. "Now is the hour..."
"It must be done now," Hecate says, her voice calm and steady as she looks with golden eyes at my mother. "The call is burning her."
Make him burn.
Mother places my gifts in a special leather satchel that she puts on my shoulder. She kisses me one last time, whispering of her love and devotion in my ear before allowing me to leave.
The voice stays with me and the tug pulls even greater in our descent into the darkness. Hecate takes the bag from me and, when I try to protest, she levels me with a golden eyed glare of the ancient.
"You are a Queen in this dead earth," she reasons. "I will carry your bag."
She tries to speak to me with her glowing torch and dogs of night... but her voice gets lost in the cave and I can not hear her as I run and stumble down the steps.
Now is the time... The madness tells me and I have never felt more ravenous. I am sweating in full now. It trickles down my spine and stains my dress, Now is the hour…
When we reach the Godly Gates, I push them open and run inside. My cheeks are heated and my chest is aching in a way it never has before. I am in pain.
Now is the hour...
I sprint along the winding path of my husband's Kingdom. I hear the roar of a million souls in turmoil and fear... I see the forever night and weeping rivers of the lost all welcoming me home…
Now is the time…
I make it to the front hall... with the green floor and spinning pillars...
Now is the hour…
I push past the ones that rest there into the arch at the end of the hall that buzzes and vibrates with its call. I feel as though my whole body is on fire.
Now is the time…
I push open the doors to the judgment hall and find Lord Hades standing in front of the dais with his back to me. The winged creatures covered in white clay whisper words only the ancient ones could understand as the ball of light on the pedestal in front of him glows a ghastly green. The gallery is empty save for one pair of glittering red eyes that watch my approach curiously.
The doors slam behind me and the winged creatures fall silent, retracting their wings. There is a great pull within my chest and I can't help but run to him. I fall to my knees just short of embracing him as the fever causes a great pressure in my head that brings tears to my eyes. I feel as though I will explode from the inside out.
Lord Hades turns slowly to look down at me.
He has let his beard and hair grow longer in my absence. It curls around his ears and looks wild under his crown and in his left hand he holds a silver chalice. He is still so incredibly handsome and it causes my heart to ache as I look upon his fine form.
I take his free hand and hold it against my cheek to find relief. The curse begins to ebb away and I am sure it would go faster if I held on to him completely- but I can not bring myself to do that. Even in the grips of a burning pain, I still retain some dignity.
"Hecate," he says. His voice is deep, authoritative. My body remembers that voice and trembles in its presence. He turns his hand to cup my cheek, giving the smallest bit of affection as the sweat drips from my brow. "I trust your descent was an easy one."
"As always, My King," she replies carefully.
I'm sure I look pathetic on my knees before Lord Hades and I hope Hecate will have enough respect for me to not tell my mother. He snaps for an attendant and one of the ashen faced creatures ventures into the room to take my bag. I glance at her over my shoulder. The shadow dogs at her feet bite and bark at his approach, but she calms them with a wave of her hand.
"Will you stay for the feast?" He asks, looking back at the sickly green light as the attendant excuses himself with my possessions.
He drops his hand and the fire in me burns anew. I bite back the whimper that wants to escape and clench my eyes shut.
Hecate looks to me for an answer. Her flame is red gold fire that illuminates her strong jawed face. I shake my head. I do not want her to see me this way and I do not know what I will have to do to stop it.
"No," she answers, her golden eyes still on me. "I have things to attend to if that pleases you, My King."
"I trust you can find your way out," he says, raising a brow when she does not dismiss herself.
"Of course, My King," she replies. "This was my home before it was ever yours."
She leaves with a swish of her saffron robes and Lord Hades turns to give me his full attention. We stare at each other for a long while before I break.
"Make it stop," I whisper. "It hurts."
"I am glad it hurts," he says darkly.
I wipe away tears with shaky hands. I have never felt this way before and my body seems to throb from the pressure.
"Please."
He waits only a moment before he helps me to my feet. He hands me the chalice. It's decorated with pomegranate trees and snakes. Inside is a glowing liquid and I hesitate a second before drinking it. It instantly cools the fire in my heart and I close my eyes for a moment to relish in the relief.
"You look wild," he studies my dirty dress and wind whipped hair. I look at him from over the rim of the cup. "Like when I first saw you."
There were so many things I planned to say to him. I had this conversation a million times in my mind. I would call him a liar and fiend for tricking me, for taking me, for only using me as revenge against my mother… but the way he is looking at me…. I can't seem to say anything at all.
"You wear a maiden's dress," he points out, looking at my exposed legs. I still preferred the short chitons of my girlhood and I wrap the cloak around myself so he can't see. "Do you still consider yourself a maiden?"
The memories of our love making makes me blush and he smiles.
He steps even closer and takes the chalice from my hands. He places it behind him before he bends down like he meant to kiss me. I manage to turn away, but he doesn't pull back.
"You smell of Helios and the fertile ground," he whispers in my ear, sighing in disappointment like he hoped for a warmer welcome. "And of Chaos and sorrow."
He pulls away and runs the heel of his right hand over his eyebrow. He suddenly seems so old and tired. I expected anger from him- not defeat.
"Your attendants wait for you in your rooms. Our people are already celebrating your return. They are very anxious to see you."
I glance up at the gallery- looking for Megaera's glittering eyes, but they are gone.
"Feast." I say- it is not a question. "I will never eat anything from this place again."
"This place," he replies. "Is your home."
"This is no home of mine." I say sharply. "It's a prison."
"Oh yes," he says, his eyes narrowed. "You have made your feelings well known on the matter."
I swallow hard at the look on his face and I am unsure if I should push it more. The Great Mothers and Fathers could be so sensitive about things... But I am entitled to my feelings.
"What do you expect?" I find my voice.
It is small. But it is mine.
"I thought we had come to an understanding." He reaches forward as if to touch me. I shy away and it angers him so he grabs my arm instead. "You wanted my affection," he says. "I know you did. You liked it, you enjoyed my kingdom, and you wanted me. You would have continued to do so had Zeus not intervened."
"You can not take someone as you did and expect love. You can not trick someone and expect loyalty. You can not look upon me- wishing I was my mother- and expect me to smile upon you. You took me to spite her and it has worked - but I will not give you the satisfaction of hurting her more by making me love you."
"You don't know what you're talking about," he replies, his eyes narrowed. "I don't wish you were your mother." His lip curls into a sneer. "She has nothing to do with this."
"I think she has everything to do with this."
"You are wrong."
"And you are a liar."
"And yet you are still here." He stares at me. His purple eyes are dark and unwelcoming. "I have shown you kindness and I have been patient," He says. "I don't have to do either of those things. I could make your stay here very uncomfortable if I wanted."
The threat hangs between us, but if he expected me to fold to it- he is mistaken.
"I will go to my chambers now," I tell him, tilting my chin up. "I don't wish to see you anymore."
He watches me leave and doesn't come after me. Once free of him, I realize the seriousness of my situation and I try to calm myself by thinking of my mother's words. How strong and kind and brave I am. I say them like a prayer until I nearly believe it.
The visiting room of my chambers is spotless and freshly cleaned, but I hear panicked cries coming from the bedchamber and I hurry in to find Minthe huddled over the fountain, running a bloodied hand in the water. The gapped tooth nymph named Cissa is frantically trying to push cloth on top of the wound, but Minthe is crying and in hysterics.
"What happened?" I ask, watching the black blood trickle into the basin. "How did you…"
"It was you!" Minthe yells at me, her dark eyes brimming with tears. At some point she had dyed her greasy hair red, but it has faded to a strange orange color and her original dark roots are growing in by the inch. "You had such a weapon in your bag to trick us!"
"What?" I whisper before spotting the dagger Artemis gave me on the ground by the bed- it's blade black with nymph blood. "Did you grab it by the wrong end?" I ask, going over and picking the gift off of the floor, putting it back in its leather sheath.
"Why do you have such a wicked weapon?" She has snot running down her lips and Cissa is crying too. "I am still bleeding! It will not stop! Am I to die?"
"Calm down," I tell her, going to my bag and turning it upside down to rummage through.
My mother had packed me comforts from home- my clothes, combs, lotions, scrolls…and even some of my childhood toys. I find the gifts from Mother Hestia and take out the glowing vial to soothe the pain of womanhood.
"Here," I walk over to her and ask for her hand.
She shakes her head, her heavy earrings clink and clank against themselves. I grab her hand anyways and pop the lid of the vial, pouring a bit onto her gaping wound and hoping for the best. After a moment of Minthe crying in pain- it begins to mend the cut.
"There," I smile despite myself and cork the lid back in place. "All is well."
"All is not well," Minthe is still hysterical and she recoils away from me with her hand cradled to her chest. "Why would you bring such a weapon to our halls?"
"Perhaps you shouldn't go through things that do not belong to you," I counter with a brow arched.
"If you just discard things- someone else is bound to pick them up."
I tilt my head at her meaning and my eyes flick to her odd orange hair.
"We should…" I look towards the gap toothed nymph when she speaks. "We should start getting you ready, My Queen."
She bows her head and scurries into the clothing alcove while I eye Minthe suspiciously.
"You changed your hair," I point out and she tucks some behind her ear self consciously.
"Do you plan on using that dagger on our Lord King?" She asks, her dark eyes glaring at the sheath on the bed. "Is that why you brought such a divine instrument of pain? You mean to wound him?"
"I would never do such a thing," I say in genuine surprise. "I never…"
"You have never loved him," she says, pointing an accusing finger at me. "You have never wanted him as you should. You have never loved us either," she adds, looking for Cissa who is wisely staying hidden. "You hate it here! You hate him and you hate us. You told all of Mount Olympus so. Your words shook our halls and rumbled our floors and all the God's flames burned bright red! You shattered our hearts and you don't even care."
I narrow my eyes. No one cares about my heart- why am I responsible for theirs?
"I am not going to the feast." I say instead of answering as I sit down in front of the hearth and start unbraiding my hair. "You can both leave."
"But…" Cissa pops her head out of the alcove, holding a purple chiton. "But… of course you must go…"
"Must I?" I ask with a sigh. "I don't think I must do anything."
"Good King Hades was wrong about you," Minthe hisses with more venom than I ever believed her to have. "You do not belong in this land. You are not fit to rule."
"Minthe! Watch your tongue," Cissa, usually silly and girl-like, seemed panicked anew by the way Minthe had decided to speak to me. "Forgive her, My Queen. She is just rattled by her wound."
"I will tell Lord Hades you have that dagger," Minthe says, sounding like a child.
I look at her and for the first time I truly see her. She has beauty, of course. It was the kind of dark, wet beauty that came with this land- and there was a loyal fire in her belly for Lord Hades. Perhaps- just as he had substituted me for my mother… he had substituted Minthe for me.
"He will not be happy with you," she says. The happy girl I had known Minthe to be has been completely replaced by a creature of malice. "You have no idea how to make him happy."
"And you do?" I ask, finally leveling her with a glare.
Jealousy was at my throat. Jealousy, anger, and Chaos. Why did this rattle me so?
You think Lord Hades does not find affection elsewhere?
"Minthe." Cissa warns again. This time her voice is a low growl. "Do not."
Minthe heeds her warning and bites back her next words.
"We shall tell Lord Hades you are not joining us in The Great Hall tonight." She says instead, bowing her head before leaving with a turn of her midnight skirts.
Cissa is next and comes up to me.
"Tonight is a celebration of your return," she says carefully as I pick up a jade handled comb and start working out the knots in my hair. "Are you sure you do not wish to attend, My Queen?"
"I'm tired," I lie.
"It's just that…" I look at her when she takes a step closer, her frizzy hair is tied with black ribbons and her eyes look nervous. "Ever since…" she stops herself. "Our King has been very… not like himself."
"I am not afraid of Lord Hades," I tell her. Perhaps another lie- but I don't know. "I was forged of steel and fire."
Steel and fire.
She nods and goes to leave- but I say her name just before she disappears.
"Minthe is in love with my husband." I say, matter of factly and she looks uncomfortable again. "Did she lay with him while I was above?"
Her eyes go wide.
"I don't…I couldn't possibly know that," she says. "I don't think…she would never actually… he wouldn't…"
I lift a hand to get her to stop stumbling over her words. Minthe's anger, her hair, and her spiteful rage tell me all that I would need to know. Now there is one more thing to be miserable about. I don't care. Or… I really shouldn't. Great fathers are never loyal. Never true.
They are hardly worth loving at all.
XXX
No one has bothered me.
I have not been called upon for judgements, or feasts, or councils. Every once in a while, Cissa will come to my chambers with a few other nymphs to bathe me or take away dirty clothes- but they do not linger like they used to.
I travel the underworld in my solitude.
I am not afraid of being alone- it has been that way most of my life and I find comfort in the stillness. Sometimes Hecate visits with her shadow dogs and golden fire- but we don't have much to talk about so we mostly sit in silence. I keep finding new creatures and new places to explore in this never ending world of pale dead lights and I enjoy the plants that grow here. They are strange and dark… and impossibly beautiful.
My thoughts often return to Artemis and her blood dipped arrows. I wonder if she and Apollo did as I commanded and buried the children that they slaughtered in Thebes.
I intend to find out for myself.
I follow a trail from the valley between the twin mountains and through the swamps of sorrow that lead to a stone lined road. The road leads to a cavern and that cavern leads to a gate guarded by a vicious three headed dog. I have wanted to see him for some time, of course. Even to the hosts above he was a beast of legend. He paces the hall, his large tail swinging behind him and his nails clicking against the ground. He is as large as a horse… bigger, even, and his three heads share one mind.
Cerberus.
His father was a storm giant and his mother a great serpent queen of the old world. They all lived together before the clay born mortals were given the earth to roam. Now his parents are chained below and he is tasked with guarding this gate forever after.
A punishment too, perhaps.
Queen…
He bows all three heads in my direction when he notices my presence. He whispers onto my light like my horse brother and I can feel his confusion. There are snakes slithering throughout his long, dark fur. They hiss and snap at each other, knotted and intertwined.
He is wondering why I am here and why I am not with Lord Hades.
"I wanted to cross your gates," I explain, motioning to the twisted metal behind him. "I have never been on the other side or seen Charon up close."
He seems unsure- like I meant to trick him. Many have done so in the past and I do not know if he is ever punished for it.
I'm sure he is.
"Has a soul ever tried to escape?" I ask curiously when the thought strikes. "I can not imagine them getting this far, to be honest," I say, more to myself as I look around the large cavern hall.
Yesss. His voice is a snake's whisper as the middle head leans forward to sniff my palm when I offer my hand. His nose is wet and he smells of death. Sssometimes they come. Ssssometimes they do not.
"And if they get to you?" I ask, curiously.
We eat their light. He answers with all three of his voices and it surprises me.
"Eat their light?" I whisper, not understanding. "What happens to them then?"
They become nothing. Nothing. Nothing.
"Nothing?" I ask, suspicious.
Never were, one voice answers. Never will be. Finishes the other. Only we remember them.
Of course, I knew of the hound of Hades and his divine task. Everyone did… but I did not know he could extinguish the everlasting light of mortals. Did that mean he could do the same to us?
When I ask him- he doesn't answer. He just stares at me with all three heads tilted down. One head is snarling. The other two are blank.
You will leave.
It is not a question. I know beyond those gates there are caves that reach up to the world of man and he must know of my displeasure of being here. I wonder if Lord Hades commanded him to guard the gate for me too.
"I will not," I reassure him. In fact, the thought never crossed my mind. Lord Hades' blood fruit is heavy in my stomach and I am a slave to its power now.
You will.
He doesn't trust me and he seems upset. There was something broken in Cerberus. Something I understood all too well. I step forward and reach out to the snarling head, running fingers over his fur and ears.
"You have been alone for a very long time, haven't you?" I whisper sadly. The snakes hidden in his fur rest for a time, soothing the great beast's eternal ache. "I know how that feels," I admit as the head tilts into my affection, his body calming under my fingers. "If you let me pass, I will not try to flee." I promise. "But I will not be angry if you can not grant me my request. I know you have a job to do and I will not want you to be in trouble."
One head tilts up to look at me. He is momentarily perplexed… he seems curious and suspicious.. but his beastly eyes decide on something and he steps aside.
Charon has no heart, he says, bowing his head. I look towards the gates as they slowly part. He is made of greed.
He doesn't say more, he can not, and I give him a small smile when I pass.
I did not expect the magnitude of what lay beyond the gates.
The cavern is immense in size. The black river that divides this land from that is uncommonly still and a dense fog rolls off of it. On the other side of the river are thousands of souls. They stand huddled together, unseeing and unblinking on the rocky shore line. Their eyes have a strange nocturnal shine and their souls tick, and hiss, and echo off the walls. There is a pale moonlight above, but the light that grabs my attention is green. It is dangling from a lantern at the helm of a rickety boat that is making its way to where I stand.
Charon is lanky and presents an old face even though his true form has no shape. His beard is long and twisted and his eyes are black like the nighttime sky.
He releases twenty souls from his care. They pass by me unseeing and make their way into Cerberus' hall. Charon's boat shrinks when it is empty, leaving the ancient ferryman at the helm of a small row boat.
He holds out a knobby knuckled hand to me, his skin is translucent so I can see the black bones underneath. I am unsure of what he wants and when I give him nothing, he pushes on his large stick to make his boat retreat back into the water. His green light leads him towards the other shore and I turn back to the gates, to Cerberus, who watches me with all six milky eyes gleaming.
Greed. He repeats as I walk through the gates. Payment.
"What does he do with all of his payments?" I ask, kind of annoyed that I would even have to pay a toll.
Eatsss them. He explains. Born with hunger. Like me.
"You are hungry?"
Alwaysss, his three voices answer.
I give him a thoughtful look and then scratch his ear.
"I will come back soon," I tell him. "And I will bring you something to eat for your kindness."
He seems pleased and he bows when I leave.
I enlist the help of a nervous looking attendant to gather food. Not much grows in the Land of Hades besides his blood fruit- but the attendants make bread out of the golden wheat in the fields of Elysian and the nymphs eat bitter purple berries that grow by one of the dark rivers.
I take a basketful to Cerberus and he eats everything in seconds.
I come back the next day and then the next and Ceberus tells me about his time as the guard dog of Hades. All the light he has consumed. The Chaos that calls to him. How one day he would like to see his parents again…. He even tells me how to get to Tartarus.
SssSafe way. He reassures me. To the fountains of youth, and life, and never ending power that are safe in the center of a river of fire.
In the deep dark wet.
Only Lord Hades and a handful of trusted companions ever go there.
"What is it like?" I ask curiously.
Blackest pit, he explains. Heat. Fire. Sweltering.
For some reason, I thought it would be cold.
"And the ones that are imprisoned there?" I ask carefully.
They sleep. He answers, purple berries staining his sharp fangs. They rest. They wait.
They wait?
"What do they wait for?" I ask and he lets one head look towards me.
For the sun to shine on them again.
He says no more and he goes back to his task as the deadly gates open to let in more souls. This time I brought payment for Charon, and I walk up to his little boat to hand him an earring. He seems to hesitate a moment before taking the offered payment and putting it in his mouth.
I get on his boat and let him row me over the black water- where shades call from the depths and dead hands claw at the bottom with bloated fingers. On the banks there are souls waiting to pass with payment in their mouths. They stand unseeing, unmoving, as I hop off the boat and move between them. They click and buzz and twitch, but they say nothing.
The only ones who realize where they are, are the lost souls who wander the caverns-unable to cross the river as they have no way to pay. I spot a woman first. She bangs her head against the wall over and over and over again.
"Gold is gold," she whispers, wearing a torn dress that tells of a violent end. Whack. Whack. Whack. "Coin is coin."
Another man is crying- his head in his hands, his bald head shining in the dead lights from above.
Another is a boy just blossomed into manhood- his eyes are gone. He tears at his chest and bites his fingers.
I use my light to call out to the ones my brother and sister murdered in Thebes- but no call answers back. Artemis and Apollo seemed to have obeyed my order- but my happiness is short lived because there is so much sadness surrounding me that I feel like it will swallow me whole. More souls are hidden inside the cave- stuck burrowing through the tight passageways in search of relief. Crawling on their hands and knees and scooting on their bellies- unable to rest. I can hear their pain and distress as they wallow in the darkness. They have no peace and no way to be judged-it was tormenting and I do not like the way it makes me feel.
I resolve to come to a solution as I go back to Charon.
He waits for me- his black eyes curious as I give him my other earring and step upon his boat.
He hisses in the old tongue. In the language of the beginning and of Chaos. Coin is coin, he whispers. Gold is gold. I look over my shoulder- at the waiting souls and all the lost that wail and sink into madness. I feel a great sadness within and I carry it with me to my chambers- where I find Lord Hades sitting by the god's flame. My dagger in his right hand.
"What are you doing here?" I ask as he puts the tip of the dagger on the armrest and begins twisting it.
"I have come to take my rights as your husband," he says flatly. "I do believe I waited long enough."
I look at the door that connects his room to mine. The lock is gone.
"You said-"
"I have said a lot of things," he says, looking at me with his purple eyes gleaming. "You have duties as my wife."
I belong to Lord Hades.
"Well," I straighten myself. "I will not lay with you."
Lord Hades belongs to me.
"You seem to think you have the choice," he says flatly.
"You would not force me," I whisper, for a moment afraid of his strength.
He says nothing and turns back to the fire, his midnight hair across his brow.
"The lost souls on the river," I ignore his implied threat as he begins twisting the dagger again. "The ones stuck without payment- we should let them pass the gates."
"Does that buy your compliance?" He asks. His voice is dry- mean sounding.
"I will not barter my affection," I whisper, putting down the basket I use to bring food to Cerberus. I take off my cloak and Lord Hades watches me from the corner of his eyes. "I just don't think it's fair that they should rot on the other side of the river when they have no control over how they were sent to us. They are… they are mad with grief and can feel the absence of divine light. They should pass our gates and be sorted like all the others."
"It is written," he says, his jaw tight in anger. "We must obey these cosmic laws."
"Why?"
He gives me a look.
"Who wrote such a law?" I ask. "And why can it not be rewritten?"
"You can't just change things because you want it to be so," he says in anger. He stands up and his midnight robes move around him. He is so tall and well formed. I truly believe he is the most beautiful man ever created. "It doesn't work that way."
"Why not?" I ask as he walks towards the fire and puts his hand on the mantle. "Is this not your realm? Are you not King?"
"Are you not my queen?" He counters, giving me a dark look. I'm wearing a sleeveless dress of pale pink silk that's nearly the same color as my skin and it's cut lower in the front. He eyes my breasts for a moment so I cross my arms. "You should not be wandering to the outskirts of the realm," he turns back to the god's flame. "You will not like what happens if you attempt to flee."
"No queen should be restricted from any corner of her kingdom. You have no respect for me. You made sure of that when you gave me your blood fruit."
He hits the wall in anger and it cracks under his strength. I move back and try to hide my fear.
"Despite your unhappiness in the matter- you are still my wife and you still have obligations to me."
"What's the point?" I ask, intending to wound. "This dead earth has made you sterile and you can not give me anything worth having."
My words anger him- shame him. He stands straight as if he meant to intimidate me and it works. He could easily crack me like he cracked the wall and I would be helpless to stop him.
"I gave you a kingdom," he says darkly, struggling to rein in his temper.
"I don't want it."
He stares at me, his jaw clenched in anger before turning away.
"I have something to show you."
"I don't care to see it," I say- though my voice has started to sound shaky.
"You will come anyway," he says, going to the large door and opening it to reveal his chambers. "Because you have to do what I say at some point."
He makes a motion for me to walk ahead of him and I hesitate a second before walking past. His room is cold and uninviting. I watch his back as he walks over to the water that falls along his wall. He pulls something from his robes, a glowing green ball that he places in the water. It makes the water flow green and he offers me his hand.
I don't take it- but I walk closer anyway.
"Step into the water," he commands.
"There is a wall there," I say and the opening to which it flows down into the darkness is but a sliver.
"Step into the water," he repeats- but when I don't obey- he puts his hand on my back and pushes me.
I clench my eyes shut- waiting for the impact of the cavern wall- but I fall into a pool instead, sinking deep into the green, glowing water until I land on hard, dry ground.
It cracks beneath my feet in a million different directions and snow comes down in thick flurries from an unremarkable sky of gray clouds. This place is barren- empty. I recognize it as the meadow of my abduction, but it is not as it was. All the trees of the nearby forest have been felled and everything else is dead.
I turn around and see a woman clothed in dove white silk. She has her back toward me and her long hair falls in spiral curls down her back. On her head rests the crown of Lord Hades.
A pomegranate tree is in the distance. Its blood red fruit is the same color as the woman's hair.
"Is that…"
"I used to think it was your mother," Lord Hades steps beside me. "I have had this dream for as long as I can remember," he says as a black snake coils up the woman's arm and rests its head along her shoulder.
Snake in the garden.
"I once called upon the Fates to see if they knew what it meant...only Atropos answered my call."
He motions over my shoulder and I turn to see Lord Hades standing naked with the crone goddess. The shears of death are hanging from her belt and her white hair is elaborately braided. Lord Hades' face looks younger- more open to the world, and the scars on his body from where he was sewn back together look fresh, angry, and red around the glowing thread.
"It was before we won the war," Lord Hades says. "I was not a king then."
"You can not see her face?" The crone Atropos asks. She is dressed in brown and her feet are muddy.
"I have never been able to." The Young Lord Hades answers and even his voice sounds less heavy and world worn. "She feels like Sister Demeter- but she is not."
"No…." the crone walks close but can not get around to see the woman's face. "She is not."
She bends down and picks up the snow, running it down her cheek as the black snake hisses into the woman's ear. The crone sees it and tilts her head.
"Peculiar."
"Do you know what it means?"
"I do not," the crone answers. "The meaning is lost to me- but you will know when you see her."
"When I see her?" Young Lord Hades tilted his head. How sweet he was then, so young and innocent.
"Yes," the crone raised a bold brow drawn in with black cole. "You will see her one day and you will know what that means."
They leave then and I turn back to my Lord Hades.
"Your song sung onto my light the first time I saw you. It sang the song of my kingdom and forever after and I knew…. I knew this vision was you all along. You see, I have been looking forward to seeing your face for centuries. It was never your mother. I tried to explain this to her that night- but she would not listen. She never listens anymore."
The vision goes black and then a new memory appears. It is in a room on Mount Olympus that I have never seen before and this Lord Hades wears dark robes and a silver crown… like the night I first saw him.
"You put too much thought into it," Great Father Zeus is resting on a chair, his hands behind his head. The room is large, open to the sky, and held up by golden pillars. On the walls are the carvings that tell the story of the before and the after to come. "That's always been your problem. You think too much."
"Perhaps you don't think enough," Lord Hades replied.
He had his hands clasped behind his back and he was looking into one of the god's windows. It showed him the gardens of the never ending night, where brother Hermes sat by himself, thoughtful in his solitude.
Father Zeus snorted in laughter.
"I have no need to be so thoughtful." He crossed his legs to get more comfortable. "My daughter with Demeter has grown into a beauty, has she not?"
"The one who would not take her chastity vow?" Lord Hades asked carefully.
"Yes," Father Zeus reached for a golden apple from a nearby table and took a bite. "I'm sure we will not be seeing her anytime soon." He added with his mouth full. "Demeter has kept her hidden from me for quite some time and I am sure she will be locked away again after the stunt the girl pulled this night."
"Why would she do that?" Lord Hades asked suspiciously. "Keep your daughter hidden from you?"
"I think you know why," Father Zeus gave Lord Hades a roguish smile. He had loosened his robes and his chest was bare. He was the only one of his siblings that did not have the vicious scars. "I apparently made an inappropriate comment when the girl first got her blood and Demeter has kept her guard up ever since. You must understand, she used to be such a pudgy little thing- I was quite surprised to see her grow as she did into womanhood."
"She is your daughter." Lord Hades said flatly.
Father Zeus shrugged before looking thoughtful.
"There is something strange in her that calls to me." Father Zeus looked at Lord Hades. "Do you hear it too, brother?"
After a moment's pause- Lord Hades nodded.
"I wish to deflower her and plant a child," Father Zeus says, his brows furrowed. "I know I should not…but her song is so sweet."
Lord Hades held no great love for his brother and glared at him when he wasn't looking.
"Alas," he bit his lip. "I promised Hera no more bastards."
They sat in silence before Father Zeus spoke again.
"It's time you took a wife so you can understand that urge. You are entitled to a great many things too, brother. You don't have to be so dour and alone. …and you should finally commit to having children after all this time. You are the only one of us who has not contributed to our world."
"Hestia has no children," Lord Hades answered.
"Hestia has no womb."
"That's not true."
"Might as well be," The Great Father shrugged. "What's the point of the body if you deny it carnal pleasure? Are we not formed for love making?"
"We are formed for many things," My husband replied. "Hestia has never had such desires and you know that."
Father Zeus looked at his brother. "Are you also a moving statue?" He asked. "Do you have no desire? Is that why you have never taken a wife or sired children?"
Lord Hades said nothing to that.
"Or do you prefer men?" He raised an auburn brow when he found Lord Hades still staring at Hermes. "I believe the swift footed godling has dabbled in both, if you are interested."
"I do not desire men."
"Do you desire anything?" Father Zeus asked dryly. "I once knew a satyr that desired a goat. Do you desire goats, dear brother?"
Lord Hades didn't bother to respond.
"My daughter, Hebe, has come of age." Father Zeus stands and pours himself a drink of sparkling nectar. "She is a skinny thing but has a lovely face. I could offer her to you."
Lord Hades says nothing again and Father Zeus sighs.
"Yes, she is almost too thin. I don't understand how all my children with Hera are so badly formed."
"Perhaps it is best if they are unpleasant to you." Lord Hades says, staring at his brother from the corner of his eyes.
Father Zeus catches his meaning.
"Only one daughter pleases me that way." He says with a smile. "And I am sure you can see why."
He stares at Lord Hades after taking a drink and then tilts his head thoughtfully.
"Does she please you too, dear brother?"
"Who?"
"My daughter. The one Demeter calls Persephone."
"Do you offer her to me?" Lord Hades asked.
"She would be a great gift. Her song is… beautiful and dark like yours, is it not?" Father Zeus seemed thoughtful. "And perhaps it would be best if she was buried away in the earth with you. Mother once told me to avoid any child I fathered with Demeter."
"Why would Mother tell you that?" Lord Hades asked, a tilt to his brow.
Father Zeus shrugged.
"I suppose because Demeter is ridiculous," he said, looking deep into a god's flame that burned in a hearth nearby.. "And you know Mother has always favored our sister... but if she is with you… I will not be so tempted."
Lord Hades thinks on it a moment before turning away.
"Our sister will not permit it."
"Well, I am the girl's father, am I not? It is well within my rights to arrange a marriage for her. She already let everyone know she wants to be bedded. It would be in her best interest to marry her off soon."
Lord Hades says nothing and Father Zeus lets him think a little longer before speaking.
"But if you don't want her," Father Zeus smirked. "I suppose I will have to visit Demeter's sacred wood one day and take what I desire. I bet I am not the only one who will try. She turned the heads of many young godlings this night. We may have to take turns—"
"I will have her," Lord Hades said quickly.
Father Zeus smiled in triumph.
"But Demeter will not agree."
"Yes, we will have to get creative- but let me handle our sister." He dug his large hand into the god's flame, hissing in pain as he pulled out a ball of white fire. He went over and clasped a hand on Lord Hades' shoulder. They are both so tall, seeing eye to eye. "We will pick a day where I can shield the sky and you can take her to your kingdom. It will have to stay secret for now- but here is my blessing."
He offers the flame, but Lord Hades is reluctant to take it.
"And if she will not have me?"
Father Zeus laughed again. He laughed and he laughed.
"Who is she to deny you?" He says, offering the flame again. "Take it before I change my mind."
Lord Hades hesitates a second before taking the flame and swallowing it.
"When she is mine," Lord Hades' voice sounded strained as the blessing burned his insides. "You will think of her no longer."
There was a clear warning in his voice and it surprised Father Zeus.
"Of course," my father shook it off with a slight smile. "I can not want someone I will never again see."
"You will not want a wife of mine," Lord Hades corrects, his voice taking that deep and kingly way he has during our judgements. "Whether you see her again or not."
Father Zeus smiled again. "Of course."
The memory goes black and I am suddenly pulled through the green water until I land back in Lord Hades' chamber.
"My father speaks that way about me?" Is the first thought that comes out.
"He's not a true father." Lord Hades answers. "He never has been." He looks away for a moment. "I could show you more, if you want. Anything you like."
I look at the water.
There is so much I would like to see. So much I could learn about him and my mother, and their past together… but I don't get a chance to say anything because one of the attendants has returned- looking nervous.
"Yes?" Lord Hades lifts a brow.
"Forgive me, My King, but two mortal men have found an entrance to our realm and have paid a large toll for Charon to carry them across the river. Megeara has tracked their movements and is ready for your command on how to precede."
"More mortals?" He seems annoyed. "Barbs to sing for their dead wives, I suppose?"
"No, My Lord," the attendant looks nervous again. "They come for…" He looks at me uncomfortably, motioning with his hand. "And they carry great swords and shields on their backs."
I laugh in disbelief. Lord Hades does not.
"Two mortal men have come for me?" I ask. "Whatever for?"
"Well, they are not mere mortals," he corrects himself. "They are the half blooded children of Great Father Zeus and Lord Poseidon. They are heroes of men."
"These great heroes come to my kingdom to take my wife?" Lord Hades is not amused- his voice is dark and troubling.
"What are they taking me for?" I ask, still puzzled.
"I'm sure they will tell you- if you ask." Megeara, with her midnight blue skin and wicked face appears behind us, her leathery wings folded behind her naked back. She tilts her head and a sheet of shiny black hair falls over her shoulder. "They are intoxicated. Full of wine and summer ale."
"They came here drunk?" I furrow my brows as her ruby eyes glisten. "With swords and shields?"
"They have already carried away a mortal child of Father Zeus. They have heard of our Queen's beauty and the swarthy one has decided to claim you for a bride."
"But I am already married… and I am not mortal… and…" I look to Lord Hades to see if he shares in thinking how silly this is- but he is not confused or smiling…his face is an unyielding stone. "I don't understand."
"They will not pass Cerberus," Megeara says, her voice is old and weathered…. a seasoned general. "They keep… laughing and tripping over things. It appears they meant to catch you in your descent to avoid the wrath of Demeter, but they got distracted and decided to come for you anyways."
"This is just so ridiculous." I say, shaking my head. "We should dispel them back to their homes and demand they return the child they stole."
Lord Hades looks at me finally, his purple eyes dark and narrowed.
You are mine- his Chaos sings onto my light- I am yours.
"They came all this way," he says, his voice unwavering as he stares at my lips. "We should invite them to our hall. They are the offspring of my dear brothers, after all."
I furrow my brows at his words and the simmering rage in his eyes. My very serious and level headed husband has welcomed Chaos into his heart.
"Megaera," the blue skinned fury lowers her chin in reverence when Lord Hades addresses her. "You and your sisters will fetch our guests and bring them to me. Ask Tisiphone to find a set of chairs worthy to seat these heroes of men."
She bows before disappearing and Lord Hades dismisses his poor attendant.
"What is your plan?" I ask, worried.
He doesn't answer me. Instead he takes my arm and walks us to the Great Hall where a godling's trumpet summons his court. As the dark creatures and hosts fill our hall, Lord Hades walks me towards the dais and has me sit upon my throne. He puts his hand on my cheek, his eyes are nearly black.
"You are mine," His Chaos whispers. "I am yours."
He turns to the room. His dreaded court, in seeing the rage that simmers inside of him, cower against each other. I can not help but think this is my fault because I had goaded him so. Now we were all in danger of his wrath.
What have I done?
"This night is a special night," he says, looking around the room. I spot saffron robed Hecate standing by herself, her shadow dogs at her feet. Even she looks concerned. "Tonight we celebrate the return of our beloved queen, who has finally found it in her heart to grace us with her presence. Our darkened halls have missed her flowered feet and sun kissed smiles." He turns to me, eyes inky black. "We are forever grateful for your return, even if you are not."
The hall is silent. No one dares make a noise.
"Two mortal sons of my eternal brother's have entered our realm." He's holding his hand in a strange way. He flicks his wrist as he speaks like he's sewing the air with a needle. "We should welcome them with all our infernal grace."
Again there is silence. No one even blinks.
"Why have they come, My King?" Thanatos is the only one brave enough to step forward- his thunderstorm eyes swirling in delight.
Lord Hades doesn't answer right away. He cracks his neck and runs his hand along his cheek like he was feeling his skin for the first time.
"My Queen."
I turn to the whisper and see Hypnos by my side. His curly hair is tamed by a bronze band he wears like a crown. Lord Hades answers the waiting crowd. They want for a queen, he says. They intend to take mine.
Mine.
"You must calm him." He kneels by my throne and places his hand on the armrest. Hypnos is sleep…His eyes are swirling with a winter's storm and he wears a short tunic of soft gray wool. .. the most thrilling release. "He has already allowed Chaos in and he is right at the precipice of total darkness. You must pull him back."
"What am I to do?" I whisper, troubled.
For the first time since my descent, I felt a real, palpable fear. Most of the hosts below loved and revered their Lord King…. Now they could not look him in the eye.
"I am unsure… but he listens to no one else," he says seriously, his boy's face troubled. "A Great Father such as he must not let Chaos reign."
"He is already upset with me," I say as he commands his hosts to assemble a table. "He could turn me into a toadstool or something equally as terrible."
"He would do much more than that," he says seriously. "Chaos in a Great Father is…well, it's devastating for everyone."
I watch his face, his golden hair shining in the torch light.
"It is fire, famine, and flood. Disease, earthquakes, and rivers of blood. It is winter. When it consumed your mother- not only did it cover the world in snow, but it changed the orbit of our world forever after. Imagine what a host like our King Hades could do with all his pent up aggression. It could be world ending."
World ending.
"This does not seem like something so world ending," I whisper.
It seemed so silly. So trivial. Though I wasn't the strongest host- I was still able to overpower a mortal man. Even two of them- if need be.
"Chaos is unpredictable in its cruelty," he explains. "It can not be controlled or harnessed in any way that will benefit its host. These mortals deserve what is coming to them-but it is everything else I fear for."
Everything else.
I go to look at Lord Hades- but he is already staring at me. I gulp loudly and stand to get away from Hypnos to save him the wrath. I place my hand upon his arm when I am near and in turn he circles his arm around my waist.
"Hypnos," he says, his black eyes never leaving mine. "Is there not something else you should be troubling yourself with?"
Hypnos bows his head and moves away swiftly.
"Lord Hades," I say to get his attention. How did my mother calm me from the Chaos? Breathing? Love? Affection? I can not coddle Lord Hades so. "I am not so weak as to be in danger of mortal men."
"No," he says, his voice a bitter chill. He is no longer the host I knew. He was his most basic and primal self. "Perhaps not- but the mere fact that they even thought about such a task is enough. These clay born bastards think so little of me that they believe it is within their rights to bride steal what is already mine. It is the arrogance of Zeus… it is the perversion of Poseidon. They disrespect me and they shame you. I will show them and they will see."
They will see.
The hosts and attendants have assembled a large table and filled it with false looking foods and wine. Nothing truly edible, just a mirage in accordance to Lord Hades demands. There is no merriment or mirth in the air- it has all been sucked out the moment Lord Hades allowed Chaos in his hall. I try to pull myself away from his suffocating embrace, but he just pulls me tighter until I have to turn more into his chest with my hair falling down my back and brushing his arm.
"You will let me have you tonight," he says, staring down at me with my body flush against his.
I glance over my shoulder and find Hypnos giving me a sad kind of look. Please, his look seems to say. Help. Chaos was not easily contained- did he not see how useless I was?
"You can have me now, if you wish," I say, bringing my hand up to his neck as I swallow my pride and my anger to combat the Chaos that calls to me. "End whatever this is now and take me to your chambers. You have not had me in such a long time."
He grabs my hand, his dark eyes staring at my lips before giving me a punishing kiss.
"Not yet," he growls as he pulls back and turns to the doors as they open.
Pale Tisiphone comes in first, dragging behind her two ornately carved stone chairs that scrape and spark against the floor. Smoke rolls from the open wounds of her charred arms and it makes the air smell of brimstone as she places them at each end of the long table. Behind her walks Megeara and Alecto, fearsome to behold with blue skin and shining eyes. Their sharp talons carry the clay born men by their throats.
They throw the mortals before the dais and Megaera drops their broken shields and bent swords before them. Alecto comes forward and hands Lord Hades a golden bracelet. It glows with godly words and has three red stones.
"Zeus," she says as Lord Hades studies the bracelet.
"Zeus," he confirms before hiding it is his robe.
The "swarthy" one, as Megeara described him, is a tall, lean man with thick black hair and a braided beard. He is in the middle of his human life and he has a few gray hairs to show for it. His face is tanned from the sun and scarred from battle and he wears an elaborately embroidered tunic with a purple cape.
The other is dark haired too, but his looks favor Lord Poseidon with large, hooded eyes and a broader chest. I find him the more handsome of the two, having inherited more of the golden glow about him than his companion. He wears crimson silk and a golden necklace.
The bearded one starts laughing, slapping his hand against his knee like the entire thing was so hilarious as he pulls himself to his feet.
"My Almighty!" He laughs and wheezes as our court circles the men curiously. "I have never seen so many bizarre things in all my life!"
"Pirithous," the other man warns. His cheeks are still flushed from drink and… drug? Yes, I feel it within them. They have consumed opium as well and I try to find Hypnos in the crowd as the poppy is his sacred plant. "Stop talking."
"What pain." The one called Pirithous stands up and rubs his bruised neck. "That blue woman is strong, is she not?"
"Pirithous," the man hisses this time and gets to his knees, bowing his head towards the dais. "Forgive our impertinence," he says, before lifting his head and sliding his eyes to mine. Lord Hades' arm tightens around me, nearly crushing me. "We did not think we would make it this far."
The bearded man finally stops laughing and he looks towards us. He does not bother with Lord Hades or the possessive way he holds me, his dark eyes look only at me.
"What wonder," he says, taking a step forward but falling back when Megaera steps in front to block him. "We share blood, you and I."
"You share nothing," Magaera says.
The son of Poseidon looks very nervous now and he seems to shrink against the floor.
"How do you find my kingdom, Pirithous son of Zeus?" Lord Hades asks in his deeply upsetting voice. "Is it to your liking?"
For a moment, the drink clears from the bearded man's mind and he realizes his folly in coming here. He swallows hard, looking around him at all the creatures he found so amusing just a moment ago. The blood seems to drain from his face and he sinks to his knees beside his companion.
"It is awe inspiring," the man says, his head bent towards the ground. Sweat beads on his forehead as the essence of poppy leaves him. "My Lord, your kingdom is great beyond comprehension ."
"And my wife?" He turns me so I stand in front of him. His possessive hand is on my stomach, the other holds my right hand. "Is she to your liking too?"
The mortal swallows hard and sends a small, worried glance to his friend.
"Will you not look upon her now?" Lord Hades sounds cruel and my face heats in embarrassment. The one named Pirithous stares at the floor. "How do you expect to take her with you if you can not look upon her?"
"My Lord… Great King… I….." the man does not know what to say and he starts breathing heavily. "Forgive me."
"Look at her, son of Zeus." When Pirithous does not obey, the rage inside Lord Hades boils over. "Look at her now!"
Everyone jumps.
I have never heard Lord Hades yell and it shocked me.
The mortal finally found the courage to look upon me and I found it within myself to pity him. A drunken game had gotten out of hand and now he would be made to suffer the consequences. Unless Lord Hades found it in his heart to show mercy…but I don't foresee that happening.
"Was she to be yours?" Lord Hades asks. "Or yours, son of Poseidon?"
The handsome one licks his dry lips nervously and shakes his head. "Not mine, King Hades."
"So you are to marry a child and you…" he turns back to the poor man who is sweating a puddle upon our floor. "You were to marry my wife."
"It was just a jest," he whispers so very quietly. "I did not seriously think I would find her."
"And yet here you are," Lord Hades says. "My most honored guest."
He makes a motion with his hand and the furies move forward.
"Sit, Theseus- son of Poseidon, at this table made for you," Tisiphone orders the reluctant man. Her ruby eyes glow and red embers flick from her twisted ram horns. She grabs his arms and moves him towards one of the stone seats that has ancient symbols carved into its back.
I can not read them- but I know it is a curse in the old tongue.
"Come," Megaera grabs the hair of Pirithous and drags him to the other seat. "Sit and feast, son of Zeus."
I turn to Lord Hades. The Chaos that swirls in his eyes calls to me. Join- it whispers- but I will not.
"You are frightening your people," I whisper to him to make him see.
"I have not yet begun," he says before having me sit back in my seat.
He orders me to stay as he walks down the dais and whispers something into Thanatos' ear. The higher ranking gods of our court take the empty seats around the table and Hecate takes advantage of the movement to come near.
"Are you alright, Queen Persephone?" She asks, her golden eyes sweeping along the table. I nod my head, not knowing what else to say. "We must tread carefully," she explains. "This is a very dire situation, indeed."
"I do not know how to stop it," I say honestly. "I have never seen him like this."
"He is better at suppressing it than his siblings. Something must have pierced him deeply."
I feel guilty, but his emotions are not my responsibility and I try to bite back the blame I feel.
"Do you know what those symbols on the chairs mean?" I whisper.
"It is the language of the earth," she explains. "Of Gaia, and Tartarus, and Erebus. It means stay where you are planted."
Stay where you are planted.
"... it wasn't serious," I hear Pirithous cry as Lord Hades takes his seat by my side. Hecate retreats into the shadows as Lord Hades takes my hand and studies the veins in my wrist. "Great King, you must see that. You must."
He is looking towards us pleadingly, but Lord Hades ignores him.
"Must," I hear Thanatos say dryly. "That is not a word one should say to a King."
He is seated by Theseus and his darkly painted hands are making the mortals nervous.
"You come to the land of the dead, but you are not dead." Hypnos says, his head tilted in mock curiosity.
"No, we are not," the handsome one answers nervously.
"Would you like to be?" Thanatos asks, smiling in a very unnerving way.
"No" the bearded one says quickly and it makes Thanatos laugh.
In fact, they all laugh.
"Good," Thanatos says. "I have a feeling you will live for a very, very long time." He stretches his wings. "Tell us honestly your intentions."
"It was just a—" Pirithous starts- but Megaera cuts him off.
"Jest," she finishes for him. "You keep saying that."
"There is a lie in his mouth," Lord Hades says as his fingers follow the vein up my arm. He places a soft kiss on my wrist. "Wash it out for him."
Megaera hops up from the chair she was perched on and grabs Pirithous by the head and shoulders. She yanks his hair back while Alecto stands up with her white chiton dripping blood all over the ground in her fury. She pries his mouth open with her pale blue fingers and then spits inside his throat.
He starts screaming and clawing at his neck.
I go to stand, but Lord Hades pulls me back.
"Wait," he says, placing a hand on my thigh to keep me in place. "Listen."
The bearded mortal finally stops screaming and he slumps over the table, knocking over cups and causing plates to crash to the ground. After a few silent minutes- he sits up and looks around as an odd green substance dribbles from the corner of his mouth.
"Why have you come here, son of Zeus?" Megaera asks as she perches on the table like a giant bird.
"I did not mean to come here," he says honestly, his eyes welled up with tears.
"What did you mean to do then?" Thanatos asks.
He struggles against the curse in his throat and he can not help but answer.
"We could not take Queen Persephone above in her sacred wood," he says. His face is red and a vein is throbbing on his forehead. "We feared the rage of Great Demeter."
"Please, dear friend," Theseus- the handsome son of Lord Posiesen - pleads. "Say no more."
"He will say all," Tisiphone tells him, her voice an ancient rumble as she grips him by the shoulder with her long nails. "Be still or I will cut out your tongue."
The threat was enough to make him shut his mouth and he looked down, unable to watch his friend seal their fate.
"My son was born dead in the deep dark snow and my wife passed not long after. After commiserating with my dearest friend, we decided to venture out and find new wives…ones made like us who would not perish so easily. Daughters of the Almighty Zeus himself."
Lord Hades' hand tightens on my leg.
"Helen was easy enough," He says, his voice hoarse. "She is destined to be the most beautiful mortal woman who ever lived and she is still but a child. She will grow to know Theseus and be his wife when she comes of age."
"Our Dreaded Queen is divine and married to a Great Father," Hypnos says, giving me a look before turning back to the mortal. "What were you thinking?" he asks in exasperation.
"It is known…." Pirithous stops himself. He tries not to say it. He really tries, but more green bile leaks from his mouth and he chokes on it.
"What is known?" Alecto asks, her face is a beautiful nightmare.
"It is known…" he struggles again, coughing and sputtering as the handsome one watches with dread. "It is known Queen Persephone hates her husband and dreads her time spent in his company. She hates his kingdom, she hates his subjects, and she is repulsed by his touch."
Theseus closes his eyes. Lord Hades drops his hand. Pirithous finally finds relief from his curse, but he knows what he has done. The hall falls silent again and I venture to look at Lord Hades. He sits back on his throne with both hands wrapped around his arm rests. His face is a darkened cloud of silent rage.
"That is not true," I whisper, but he is completely gone. "It is not known."
"I was to woo her in her descent into the dead realm where godly eyes can not see and rescue her from her damned fate. If I could not woo her and she would not come willingly…" I glance at Pirithous. He can not stop talking now and he has resigned to his fate. "I would use the strength given to me by my Almighty Father and the divine instrument I had taken from the centaurs to have her submit."
Have her submit.
Something scratches at my heart with his words.
"There is a grove known to my divine father," he continues. "It blocks out divine eyes so he may..." he starts choking again. It's coming out of his nose. "It is where my mother received me from Almighty Zeus. Holy Demeter wouldn't know. Dread Hades wouldn't see. There would be enough time to do what Lord Hades could not."
We all stare at him now.
No one asks him to finish. Even Thanatos, who seems to take delight in making things as uncomfortable as possible, stays silent.
But Lord Hades does not.
He stands and walks to the end of the dais. Even the fearsome furies bow their heads.
"What is it I can not do?" he asks, his voice is calm…. misleadingly calm… and Pirithous starts coughing so hard on the curse in his throat that he turns nearly purple and he spews green bile all over the table.
Hubris.
This would never come to pass if I was Athena or Artemis. No one would dare do this to my heavenly sisters. Lord Hades wouldn't have taken them. Mortal men wouldn't carry them to a secret grove and be made to submit with divine instruments. Why do people think me so weak? Probably because I am weak. A silly girl attached to my mother's skirts with no mind of my own.
The darkness starts to whisper to me.
You are a Queen, it says. Show them and they will see.
They will see.
"Of course he must answer," Lord Hades says, but his dark eyes aren't looking at them- he is looking at me. "What can you do that I can not?"
Hubris.
I stand and walk towards my lord husband and he places a hand on the small of my back when I am near. He hands me the golden bracelet- it's cursed words glowing with my touch.
"See," he takes the bracelet and slips it on my wrist.
I feel the power drain from my body. I fall against Lord Hades and he catches me as the bracelet takes away all my strength. I am helpless- weaker than a mortal. I feel every ache and every pain in my body. The air is a bitter chill and my lower jaw chatters against it. I have never felt smaller and when Lord Hades takes the bracelet off- he tilts his head to see my reaction.
"See?"
Yes, I see.
They could have done whatever they wanted to me had they managed to slip that on my wrist and I am such an idiot I probably would have let them.
The rage is hot in my stomach. It coils around like a snake before moving through my body.
Hubris.
I am the daughter of the God of gods and the Great Mother of the Harvest. I am the wife to an ancient father who rules the largest kingdom in our world. I would never be the companion of a clay born mortal or lay under him- tricked and drained of power. I am the queen of the everlasting dead, and the darkness, and the deep dark wet.
"I would bind her to me with flesh and blood," He's looking at his lap now, defeated. "I have already fathered one son. I could put more inside her and then she would have no choice but to be content."
No choice.
"Lord Hades can father no children." He says. "It is known."
It is known.
I feel the venom in my heart. Venom at his pride and his hubris in thinking he had any right to think of me in such a way.
Lord Hades' blackened Chaos calls to me again. Join me- it hisses and this time- I answer it.
I clench my fists and the table starts shaking, rattling the bowls and cups- making some fall over and spill.
Most assume I have no agency over myself or strength of my own. Too stupid and silly to make my own decisions. To them I am the weak willed daughter of Mighty Demeter. The foolish child of Great Zeus. The pitiful wife of wise Lord Hades. Unworthy of my birthright and easily swayed…
"Persephone," Hecate's voice sounds strange and barely pushes through my rage. She is by my side, but Lord Hades orders her away.
Persephone.
Of course the name was given to me by an all loving mother. But I am not that girl anymore. I am a Queen…. I am The Queen of this dead earth and I will not be so disrespected.
The ancient curse etched into the back of the chairs flame to life and the clayborn men start screaming as their skin fuses with the stone. A few courtiers jump back in surprise- but a few of the older ones watch on unblinkingly.
Stay where you are planted, Chaos hisses in my ear.
She has a lover's voice.
"Stay where you are planted," Lord Hades says through the raging tempest in my mind.
As they scream, the darkness overtakes me until I see nothing and feel nothing in the void. Lord Hades appears before me- the only illuminated thing in this world of forever night. His eyes are as black as my heart and he pulls me into a biting kiss that tastes of pomegranates and the mortal blood of the living.
For the first time, I could hear my own song. The song that called to Lord Hades and my Father Zeus. It was the sweetest song of Chaos. Of beginnings, and ends, and long hallways behind locked gates.
It was the song of the first and the last and it was mine.
There would be no others before it.
XXX
I do not know how long Chaos kept me and Lord Hades in its embrace.
We woke naked and entangled on his bed and I had the familiar ache of lovemaking between my legs. He looked confused as he lifted himself from me and he sat at the edge of the bed, running his hand over his face.
"Are you alright?" He asks, his voice hoarse.
I nod even though he can't see me.
"That has never happened to me before." I admit, shifting uncomfortably. "The darkness has never taken me so completely. Has it..."
"Yes," he cuts me off before I can finish and walks naked to the god's windows. They hang on the cavern wall above his three burning hearths.
He watches Olympus first, and then the mortal world, before lastly checking the mirror that reflects our kingdom.
"It has been three weeks," he says flatly- crossing his arms. "It doesn't look like we have done much damage." He glances at me. "Besides to each other."
Chaos was rage, and lust, and primal ache. Chaos had brought me to my most basic form and I blush when I remember the scratching, licking, and biting…and the dagger. I look at the bedside table where it has been stabbed into the wood. I check my wrists for cuts-but find them already healed.
"You will be so far behind…" I whisper to myself- thinking of the judgment hall.
"Yes," he admits- turning to me fully. "It has been a very long time since I let Chaos take me." He admits, his brow furrowed. "I thought I had tamed that part of me. I'm sorry."
I have never heard someone like him apologize for anything.
"Perhaps you should apologize too." He says and now it is my turn to furrow my brow.
"For what?"
"Because you were… " he trails off with a smile. "Very rough."
"Did you not like it?" I ask, remembering that he very much did.
Instead of answering, he comes back to the bed and sits heavily down beside me.
"Your darkness calls to mine," he says gently. "I've heard it since you were a child. Have you heard it too?"
I shake my head.
"Of course. You are still too young to hear such things." He pauses for a moment, looking me over. "We must be careful to not let it over take us again. There is much awfulness we could do together."
Awfulness.
I nod my head, but stop when I hear a very faint cry. Lord Hades hears it too and he walks into my chambers to find the source. I walk behind him, not even bothering to cover my nakedness as he stops by my bed. He looks at me- his face unreadable.
"What is it?"
I go to him and see a plant growing in through a crack in the floor. Its green stems are long and thin with rough edged green leaves.
It's crying.
I get down on my knees and touch one of the leaves and then pull my hand back when I remember…. I remember what I had done.
"It's Minthe." I say in horror.
I gently pull her from the floor, careful not to disrupt her roots that are surrounded by dark earth. I place her in an empty bowl and shine my light upon her until she is content.
How did it come to this?
Through the darkened haze I remember finding her with Cissa on the second day of Chaos. Cautious and scared, they realized too late I was not myself. Seeing Minthe with her awful red hair had ignited a bitter jealousy within me and Cissa ran as I lifted Minthe by her throat.
"How many times have you laid with my Lord Husband?" I had asked, my voice dark and chilling. She didn't answer so I gripped her neck tighter. "He is mine."
I threw her down and she rubbed her throat.
"You don't even love him," she had said. "He could never be yours."
Why did she say that when I was in the grips of Chaos? I could not control myself or my rage. Surely she knew that. I thought of her as an invasive weed that took over happy meadows and would not go away no matter how many times you tried to pull her out. The darkness came clawing up my throat until it shot from my fingertips and turned her into what she is now.
I stepped on her as I made my way back to Lord Hades to mount him once again and she has been crying ever since.
"Can you… change her back?" I ask, already knowing the answer… but the regret is weighing heavily on my heart.
I never thought I could do such a thing. I never thought myself capable.
"You know I can not," he answers.
That is all he says. He has no other words to offer and I bring my hand up to bite my fingernails anxiously.
"Are you not upset?" I ask, looking at his emotionless face and waiting to see his rage or disappointment… maybe even despair. "Was she not your lover?"
He laughs a humorless little laugh.
"No," he answers like I was an idiot. "She was not."
She was not.
I had transformed Minthe for an imagined slight that wasn't even real. Somehow, that made it even worse and I slump down on the bed, feeling ashamed and stupid.
"She did not deserve this fate," I whisper, emotion making my throat tight as I pull a blanket to cover my nakedness. I put my hand on my neck as the tears well in my eyes. "I have turned into everything I despise."
Lord Hades comes to me and kisses the top of my head.
"Even the most patient host is not immune." He says as he runs the back of his hand down my cheek. "This is my fault. I am older and should have stopped it."
"Yes," I say to put the blame on him, but knowing it is all my own.
I feel very close to crying again- but I try to swallow the emotion to seem stronger than I am. I dress myself with Lord Hades' help and comb out my hair. I wear black to match my mood and I keep finding myself overwhelmed with emotion everytime I look upon Minthe. What I had done to the nymph was unforgivable and irreversible. How will I look upon the creatures of this realm after what I have done? How can I judge others when I have shown myself to be just as terrible as the ones we punish? How could I ever show my face after destroying an everlasting life?
"I am wicked," I whisper, putting the comb down and finding myself crying with my head in my hands.
"You are not," Lord Hades says softly. "You are just flawed like the rest of us."
"Cruelty is not a flaw," I say sharply, narrowing my eyes as Minthe's stem seems to quiver in her bowl. "It is a disease…We would never allow the clayborns to be this way. We expect so much more from them and expect nothing of ourselves. We are hypocrites full of rot."
That's what Chaos was. A rot that is rooted in our hearts, decaying our bodies and minds decades at a time.
"Perhaps," he says carefully. I can feel his eyes upon me. "But we are full of other things too."
I do not have an answer to that and he says no more. Minthe sings a sad song and I reach out to touch her… to calm her… to ask for forgiveness.
"Can I plant her above?" I ask when the thought strikes me. I look at him over my shoulder. He is still naked, but he wears it well. Solemn and dignified, he stands behind me looking every bit a king. "In my mother's grove? She will not survive down here without the sun and rain."
"It will have to wait," he says. When he notices the pout on my face, he is careful to explain. "Winter," he reminds me. "The world of men is cold and plants hide within the earth"
I nod my head. Of course. Another thing that is my fault.
A very timid looking attendant peeks his head around the door frame. I notice him first and he seems relieved.
"My King," he steps into the room and bows low. "Welcome back."
"I assume you have much to tell me," he says. He is still naked, but neither he nor his attendant seem to care.
"Yes, My King."
His bugged eyes shift to mine.
"Shall we go to the judgment hall?" The attendant asks carefully, his eyes still on me. "Would you rather…"
"Go to the hall, husband," I say to Lord Hades as I go back to Minthe and run my fingers down her stem. "I wish to be alone."
Lord Hades nods and he and his attendant disappear into his chambers, shutting the door behind them after a lingering farewell kiss.
I sit down on a stool and put my face close to Minthe.
"I am sorry," I whisper. "You did not deserve this. I wish I could change you back."
She speaks to me in quiet whispers. Of her sorrow and pain. I feel myself starting to cry so I wipe them away quickly and promise to plant her in a lovely spot above so she will finally know the sun. I tell her of my mother's grove and of the plants and animals that live there. I promise to always protect her and take care of her.
I say things I should have said when she was in her first form as her queen.
Eventually she becomes silent and I sit back, letting the emotion take me. I curl into a ball on my bed, allowing myself to drown in my sorrow and guilt until there are no more tears to shed. The memories come quickly then- blurry and dark around the edges. Lord Hades and I had been in Chaos' grip for longer than I thought possible, but mostly our violence was against one another.
"The old gods used to drink our blood," he had said. "The War for the Dawn didn't start right as Zeus freed us from our father. We needed time to adjust and figure out our powers. They used to hunt us down and they used their teeth to rip our flesh. Iapetus fed off of me for a month before your mother freed me."
"Why did they do that?"
He shrugged, his eyes pitch black pools. "For the taste and the knowledge it granted. My Father claimed it made them stronger and kept them youthful- but I am unsure. They used our blood as nectar. Would you like to see if I taste different?" He took my dagger and unsheathed it, cutting a small line down his arm and offering it to me as gold blood started to bead along the wound.
He tasted of a long summer in a grassy meadow. He tasted of the sweetest dream and the most frightful nightmare. He tasted of eternity.
He told me I tasted of home.
I pull myself from the memory and look towards my dressing table where the jewelry rests. Lord Hades was also the host of riches as so many hide deep within his kingdom. He has gifted me many pieces.
Charon would find them tasty, I am sure.
I look at Minthe one more time and decide to do a good deed to help ease the guilt I feel. I put on my midnight cloak and gather up all the jewelry… leaving only my crown in its ornate wooden box. I place it all into a bag and make my way through the winding kingdom to the deadly gates where Cerberus waits.
Queen, he says, his three heads bent with my approach. I have missed you.
"I have missed you too," I tell him, petting one of his ears before he lets me pass.
Charon looks very displeased to see me, but I suppose that is his way, and he takes my payment in his crooked hand. I look around the cavern as I take a seat and he pushes his boat off the rocky shore to glide over the river. I move my hand to run my fingers along the black water, but pull back when I see faces staring at me from underneath.
"Who rests below?" I ask, glancing at Charon. "Are these living souls?"
"Temptation," he answers, his voice a raspy whisper with his hood up and in tatters over his ancient head.
That is all he says and I frown at his back. He is an unpleasant creature, not man nor divine, but something strange in-between. With only one drive and one purpose in this immortal life, I wonder what a creature like Charon thinks about when he is not working on his task.
Does a creature like Charon think?
Of course he must. Perhaps he has thoughts and feelings. Love and hate...
"Help me..."
I look towards the icy fingers curling along the edge of the boat and I glance at Charon.
"Help me!"
A bloated corpse pulls himself up and reaches a dead hand towards me.
"Please!" he shouts with broken teeth and black eyes. "Have mercy!"
He is not clay born. He is something else... Something dark and born in the night...
"What are you?" I ask him curiously, but his eyes do not see me... He has no mind of his own... He is from the shadowlands beyond.
"Trickery," Charon says, his voice sounding like the croak of a frog. The corpse slumps back into the water and I realize there is much I don't know about this kingdom.
I grip the side of the boat when it slides against the wet earth and I hop out. Shades move forward and Charon's boat grows to accommodate them. There seems to be more souls than before and a lot of them have painful looking sores around their mouths and noses.
Sickness.
Disease.
Pestilence.
Was this my doing too? Or Lord Hades'? Did our rage touch the world above and bring a plague? I can not think of it now- I am already full of remorse. It is all consuming and suffocating.
I find the woman first.
"Gold is gold," she says, wacking her forehead against the cavern wall. "Coin is coin."
I put my hand in front of her forehead to stop her assault and she turns to me. Her eyes are haunted and deep set. I do not know how long she has been here, but judging from the style of her tattered dress it could have been one hundred years.
I reach into my bag and pull out a golden ring.
"Gold is gold," I say as I take her hand and place it in her palm. I take her arm and walk her to the bank-to find Charon already waiting.
He looks at me and then at the woman…. She offers him the ring- but he does not take it.
"Charon," I say, trying to muster some kind of authority. "You will take her payment."
He shakes his head and then brings his ancient hand up to his mouth and taps his lips.
She understands before I do and she quickly places the ring on her tongue. He reaches out and takes it from her and allows her onto his boat. As he rows away, she looks at me once over her shoulder and kisses her hand to show me thanks.
I find the finger biter next and give him an emerald earring.
He starts sobbing when he enters the boat and then he starts laughing.
The bald man is next. Then an old woman I found huddled in the darkness. And then a short man missing his arms. Then a priest… A prostitute… a handful of soldiers….I'm attempting to draw a young woman out of one of the cavern's tight passages when someone falls to their knees behind me and grabs the bottom of my cloak.
"I was just about to lose all hope."
I turn to find a shade of a man behind me. He is old. His hair is nearly all white and he has deep wrinkles around his eyes and mouth.
"You must be the majestic Queen of Hades."
He looks up at me with awe and presses my cloak to his lips.
"I have heard rumors of your sweet temperament and great beauty. What an honor it is to find you on this side of the river."
He presses his forehead to the ground and then he stays there until I touch his shoulder.
"Rise," I tell him. "You need not do that now."
I did not deserve reverence after what I had done to Minthe. I now owe a penance and no one should have to bow to me.
"How noble you are…." He brings his hands up as if in prayer. "If only my queen had been half as noble…"
"You were a king?" I ask with a brow raised.
He is naked save for a sash thrown around his shoulders. He is missing all the finery of royalty and he looks hardly better than a beggar with his unkempt hair and mouth missing too many teeth.
"Yes," He answers. "I was… once."
You were once a king…
"Forgive me, My Queen, but you look… you look quite sad. Are you… are you alright?"
You were once a queen….
My emotions are shown so plainly that even a shade I did not know could see them. I feel ashamed again and I look down at my hands. Who am I to be so sad when he stands naked before me- dead and alone.
You were once the greatest thing the world had ever seen….
"What is your name?" I ask. I shake my head and press my fingers to my temple to rid myself of the intrusive thoughts. He looks away and pretends not to see the weakness.
"Sisyphus," He answers, bowing his head. "First King of Ephyra."
"Your people did not honor you in death," I say. "Did you die in battle?"
It was not uncommon for warring fractions to mistreat the bodies of the slain states they conquered. Fallen kings were especially treated poorly and many of them lingered unburied.
"Not battle," He answers. He is not much taller than me and he's paunchy. He is not a warrior now… if he ever was one. "My wife and my brother conspired to steal my crown. They poisoned me with spoiled meat and- as I lay dying- they stripped me of my fine clothes and threw me in the city square so all would know my reign was over."
He looks at me, his eyes full of sadness.
"No one dared give me the burial I deserved and now I will never know peace." He gives me a sad smile. "But what am I to a great host like you?" He whispers. "I deserve nothing and you deserve everything. I am sorry for your sorrow."
A mortal feeling sorry for me. Before it might have annoyed me- but now I feel oddly touched by the sentiment.
"I do not know what kind of man you were," I tell him as I reach into my bag and pull out a necklace. "But you will have the chance to be judged now. I'm sorry that this won't fit better in your mouth- but I have run out of smaller pieces."
He takes the necklace and looks down at the pretty stones.
"What a mercy, indeed, My Queen. You truly are the most generous host." He says. "But I fear the judgment."
"Why?" I ask suspiciously. I am not like Lord Hades. I can not see into them so clearly and my light is more clouded with guilt now than before.
"Almighty Zeus has no love for me."
"This is the Land of Lord Hades," tell him because I had no love for Father Zeus either. "You need not worry about those hosts that rest above."
He nods, his fingers playing with the clasp of the jewelry.
"But I do worry. I worry about so much. I worry about my children now that my brother has taken my throne and my wife. I worry that he means to put them to the sword and treat their bodies as they have treated mine. I worry about my daughters whom my brother watched with lustful eyes as Great Zeus looks upon all women of beauty. I worry for my people as my brother is cruel and unjust. If I could wish for anything it would be to warn them. To return to the earth and let them know of the danger that follows."
"You would be but a ghost if you returned," I tell him. "No one would see you or heed your warning. It is best to find peace in your ever after and let the living figure it out for themselves."
He nods and does not speak for a while. The cave echoes with others in despair and the air suddenly smells putrid.
"I would dearly love to embrace my children one last time," he says to himself, looking back down at the necklace with a thoughtful tilt to his head. "I had many of them."
"Perhaps one day you will."
A silence falls between us again. He seems to be thinking hard about something and all I can think of is Minthe and the two mortal men Lord Hades and I damned to be fused with stone forever after.
"Is it true, My Gracious Queen," I shake from my thoughts to look at him once more. "That a mortal came to your halls to retrieve his wife? It is said you convinced your mighty husband to allow him to return her to the earth in her first form."
"That is true," I say.
"What kindness is in your heart, My Queen. What goodness you possess. How lucky we are to have you."
Kindness was the greatest trait a queen could have. I used to think that before I let Chaos take me and destroy those who came in my path. I think of Minthe … forever changed…Forever living within the dirt….Forever singing a song no one will ever hear….I think of the sons of Zeus and Poseidon- forever screaming in the darkness.
"It did not work out the way I had hoped," I answered honestly. "She did not heed my husband's commands and was sent back to her ever after."
"But it is possible?" He asks. "To go back in your first form?"
I do not answer.
"Of course, I do not deserve it either way," he hands back the necklace. "I deserve to rot here for being so blind and for putting all my love and trust into the wrong people. Save your jewels for the others, my most gracious queen," he says, walking away from me and finding a rock to slump on. "I am right where I belong."
If he belonged here- so did I. If ever I was to be judged, I know I would have marks against me for what I allowed to happen when Chaos took control. What I did to Minthe and the mortal men will forever be a stain on my light and I fear I will never be free of it.
I hand out the rest of my jewelry to the lost souls that seek me out, but I save one last bracelet for myself to cross. There are still so many more to save and I can hear them screaming as I take my leave. Charon doesn't make me put the payment in my mouth and when I question him about making the mortal shades do it, he has no answer.
Once back in my rooms, I take off my cloak and sit in front of the hearth. Minthe sings her song and I look over at her. I feel like such a failure. I have no real power and what power I do have is buried deep and only comes out to perform cruelty.
Reap what you sow.
Could I right my wrongs by helping Sisyphus cheat death? I could send him back to the living earth alive and well and have him correct what had been done to him in a way I will never be able to.
Perhaps not. It is a stupid idea, of course. I am forever a bumbling idiot.
Tartarus. Minthe whispers and I look at her. Tartarus.
Yes, the water of the first form rested in Tartarus. So did the waters of eternal life. These were such important things to our kind, yet only Lord Hades was in charge of them. He would not grant it to the man I had met on the other side of the river. I know he would not….and he would never permit me the power of knowing how to get them..
Tartarus, she says again as I think of what all has transpired since my descent.
Maybe Tartarus was where I belonged.
I pick up Minthe and leave my rooms. I walk among the dead things and into the hall of three kings where I stare at the barred entrance into the nether realm.
Tartarus… Minthe sings again as I stare into the inky darkness and smell the sulfur that rolls between the bars.
It calls to me now just as Chaos had dripped her poison into my ear.
Come… the darkness whispers…. And see.
Cerberus told me there are two entrances to the great prison. The one before me takes a key known only to Lord Hades and the other is by the opening of Hypnos' cave- where only divine blood can open the gate.
Tartarus.
I do not know why she keeps saying it and I look down at her cradled in my arms. Maybe she thinks I belong there now too. I can not deny the pull in my heart to see it. Perhaps it is because I had let Chaos start to rot my heart or maybe it's because of the mellow song I have started to hear come rumbling from the darkness.
Tartarus.
I don't even know if the man on the banks is telling the truth. I do not have the gift that Lord Hades seems to possess when it comes to mortals. But what is the harm in seeing Tartarus for myself? Of collecting the sacred waters just in case I may need them? It is an unexplored region of my kingdom, after all, and I want to know all of it.
Tartarus, Minthe sings again and I look at her with the guilt thick in my throat.
Go, her song whispers. See.
Come… the darkness entices with promises of wonder. And see…
Maybe I should see and be reminded that our position is not always infinite. One day someone or something stronger may come along and cast us down unless we rule justly and with kindness.
There was no kindness in Chaos… no forgiveness in Tartarus. Perhaps it is where we all belong.
Go, Minthe sings again. See… for me.
For me.
I close my eyes for a moment and listen to the call of the never ending darkness. It was a child's lullaby wrapped up in a mother's arms.
For me.
With resolve, I go back to my chambers and place Minthe by the burning hearth.
I dig through the cedar chest at the end of my bed until I find the gift Thanatos gave me on my wedding night. The granite scepter with the red ruby comes to life when I pull it from its hiding place and I marvel at the flame before putting it in my bag. I go to grab my cloak before remembering what Cerberus said- Tartarus was sweltering.
I put the cloak down.
Perhaps, I should ask Lord Hades to accompany me.
That is the fear talking- but I listen to it anyway and seek him out.
He sits in the judgment hall with four attendants before him. Hypnos and a host whom I have never been formally introduced to stand off to the side. Lord Hades is dressed in a short, dark tunic and his hair is still messy from love making. He rests his elbows on his knees and listens to them speak with his chin in his hand.
I have never seen him look so much like a boy or dressed so informal without a black himatian draped around him.
He notices me and lifts his hand to silence the attendant.
"What is it, my love?"
My love.
My eyes flick to the others in the room and then I glance at the pale haired host that has green algae all over her naked body. She is ancient and tall- older and larger than even Lord Hades. Powerful and lovely, I knew her even though I had never seen her. Styx. She looks damp and her hair hangs past her shoulders- curly and wet. She looks like the bloated corpses that cry in her black river.
"Do you wish for more jewelry?" He asks, giving me a look like he knows what I've been doing.
"I was just…" I look at his people again and realize we have been gone for nearly a month and it wasn't fair of me to pull him away for more. "I just wanted to see if you needed any help."
He gives me a funny kind of smile.
"You may listen, if you wish." He sits up and motions to my chair. "Come sit."
"Oh." I shake my head. "No, that is quite alright….I was going to take a walk."
"I thought you wanted to help?" He lifts a dark brow and sits straight when he detects the lie.
I don't say anything to that and he stands up. The attendants and hosts part as he makes his way towards me.
"What is it?" he asks, his dark purple eyes study my face. "Tell me."
"I want to go to Tartarus."
Come and see.
He's silent for a moment before he shakes his head.
"No."
"If you came with me—"
"No."
"I want to see the sacred waters."
"No."
"Husband—"
"No."
"But I'd like to see—"
"There is nothing to see," he says, annoyed. "It is the darkest night."
"But there is a lake of fire—"
"It's a river," he corrects. "And the answer is still no."
I want to be stubborn and push back, but I do not. I look down at his chest and nod.
"I was just curious to know more about our land. I will…" I glance up at him. "I will return to my chambers." The idea is unpleasant to me- I wish to be away from Minthe. "Or I could stay and listen, if you'd like… I just… I feel like I should see it. I have this strange weight in my chest and I don't think it will go away until I have seen the darkness for myself."
Tartarus.
He gives me a thoughtful look and then runs his thumb over my lower lip.
"You are new to sorrow and regret," he whispers so the others will not hear. "You are right that a queen should not be barred from any area of her kingdom. If you wish to go there then go there you shall."
I take his hand and lean into his affection.
"Hypnos," he calls and the golden haired host steps forward. He's dressed in shimmering bronze and gold now and he looks so handsome. "You will take Queen Persephone on a tour of the pit. But only to the river's edge. Do not get in the boat. Do not go to the sacred wells, and do not cross," he places a sweet kiss to my lips. "I will show you those myself one day."
"Is it terrible?" I ask.
"Not if you stay on the correct side of the river." He nods to my bag. "You will need the torch."
How did he even know?
Hypnos walks towards us and Lord Hades levels him with a look.
"If you feel the slightest rumble- you will not descend," he tells the golden haired host who nods his youthful looking head. "If one little thing seems off- you take her and leave immediately."
"They still slumber, My Lord King," Hypnos reassures him. "I doubt this will wake them and I will put them down again if they do."
Lord Hades nods and kisses my forehead. When we leave, Hypnos gives me a curious look.
"This is a strange request, indeed, My Queen," he says softly. "Can I ask why?"
"You can," I reply. "But I am not sure I have a real answer."
He gives me a small smile.
"I hear you have been helping the mortal shades to cross Styx's river." He says. "She is very annoyed by that, you know." I think of the tall host in the judgment hall and her wicked looking face. "She is very particular about the laws in our land."
"I don't think it's fair that they should be there," I say softly- honestly. "I was just trying to help."
Perhaps I was trying to ease my conscience too, but Hypnos did not need to know that.
"You are very sweet, indeed," he says, his winged crown bejeweled with rubies and saphires. "I am partial to clay borns myself."
I look at him, his boyish profile so finely shaped and his lips pleasingly full.
"They spend half their lives in the worlds I have created for them…. In the songs I sing of their triumphs and fears…."
He trails off thoughtfully before smiling at me.
"I seem to see only the best in them- where my brother seems to see the worst. I believe you and I are alike in that way."
"I don't feel so sweet," I say, thinking of poor Minthe and wondering if Hypnos has ever brought her a dream. "I could not soothe Lord Hades like you asked and let the darkness take me as well."
"Sometimes- we can not help it," he says gently. His stormy eyes are still- not forever swirling like his brother's. "The pull towards Chaos is great. We are all in danger of getting pushed into its embrace."
"Has it happened to you?"
He nods- but says nothing else.
We walk together through the forever night. Through the blue grassed meadows and swampy marsh until we reach a strange little cave hidden at the edge of a dense, black forest. I take out lightbringer and hand it to Hypnos so he can lead the way.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asks with a brow arched. "It isn't much to look at and it feels very…" he trails off trying to find the word. "...oppressive."
I say nothing and he takes that as my answer to carry on.
The cave is dark and the passageway is tight. I focus on the back of Hypnos neck and the three freckles he has there as I run my hands along the glittering walls. I suck in my stomach when the passage narrows and I must turn to fit as the damp air makes my hair curl.
How does Lord Hades fit through such a passage? He is much larger than I am.
I can hear water in the distance and Hypnos helps me climb into a small hole in the wall that leads to a larger chamber. There is a black metal disc on the ground and Hypnos looks at me with water falling behind him. His face is engulfed in lightbringers red flame.
"Lord Hades has shown mercy to the great Titans and allows them to slumber," he explains. "But if they were to wake…you must not engage with them. They can not cross the Great River but their voices can still ripple in the dark. Do you understand, My Queen?"
"Yes."
"Great Cronus is the only one strong enough to have his powers reach across the river- but he is buried deep and his sleep is deeper still. I have made sure of that. He will not bother us- but the others may hear you and try to call out. Do not call back. Yes?"
"Yes."
"Our Great King has given me an honor allowing me to show you this alone," he says, his boyish face so handsome and sweet. "We shall follow all his rules, yes?"
"Yes."
There is a sharp spike on the wall. Hypnos hands me the torch as he slices his hand on it. His blood is silver- not gold like mine or Lord Hades. It reminds me of how old he truly is. I watch the blood move down a crevice in the wall and circle the black disk. The disk begins spinning and its pieces begin to shift and unlock until it opens to pitch black darkness.
I hesitate and Hypnos watches me closely as smoke rises from the hole.
"Do you want to go back?" He asks.
"No," I say, straightening my spine. "I have come all this way."
My stomach feels upset. Everything inside of me is telling me to leave, but I should be brave. I am a queen, after all.
Come and see.
"My mother said that Tartarus is farther down from the dead earth than the dead earth is from the living."
"That is true," he says to the stale air. "We do not walk down, of course. That would take us years." The smoke curls around his ankles and I hear an odd ticking noise coming from the hole. "There are great winged horses that live in the smoke. They will carry us."
He offers me his hand.
"But first, we must fall." He says as I place my hand in his and he pulls me close. "Hold on to me."
I do as he says and curl lightbringer against my chest as we jump. We fall through the air and into the deep, dark pit. At first the air is cool- then it heats into a blazing inferno that hurts my lungs and burns my skin. My dress whips around me violently and so does my hair- but Hypnos' grip is strong and his body stays in position. The descent scares me and Hypnos must sense it because he whispers a dream into my ear. Of sunshine, and bear cubs, and beautiful streams….
He lands gracefully on a cliff's ledge, but I land on my back when he lets me go. Lightbringer slams to the ground beside me and rolls away, but Hypnos is quick to retrieve it before it falls over the edge. I can only see the vaguest outline of him as he walks towards me- so great is the darkness.
"This was a good gift Thanatos gave unto you," he says, looking into lightbringer's red gold flame as he helps me to my feet. I can only see the places of him that lightbringer touches and nothing else. I doubt he can see me at all. "He would never let me borrow it- even when I came down here. Such is the annoyance of having a brother of one's own."
I'm sweating and I wipe it away quickly with the back of my hand. It is incredibly hot and we are not even all the way down. My dress feels heavy on my shoulders… it's almost suffocating, so I have Hypnos hold my bag so I can pull it off, leaving me in the black chiton that grazes my knees. I take the belt from my dress and tie it around my waist and then I quickly braid my hair, using a silver tassel to secure it.
Hypnos watches me, his face unreadable, but he looks away quickly when I take my bag and place it over my shoulder.
"There are creatures that live down here," he explains carefully, still not looking at me as I step closer into the light of the torch. "Not only those imprisoned, but ones formed in the darkness. They will not bother us, but you may hear them move around you. They will do you no harm."
"What kind of creatures are they?" I ask.
"I do not know," he smiles. He has only one dimple on the left side of his face that shows when his mouth turns up. "I have never seen them."
"Oh," Is all I say, looking into his stormy eyes that shine brilliantly in the torchlight.
"Are you ready?" he asks. When I nod in confirmation, he brings his fingers up to his mouth and lets out a high pitched whistle.
I hear stomping coming from below. It shakes the ground beneath my bare feet and with it comes a strange swishing noise. After a few moments of rumbling darkness, two pale horses with manes of blue fire flame to life before us and I fall back in surprise. Hypnos grabs my arm to catch me and I hold on to him like a child. They are grand beings, these horses of night. They stand before me muscular, majestic, and completely free of hair leaving only their smooth, spotted skin exposed. Their wings are leathery like a bat's and they have no eyes.
I suppose they wouldn't need them down here.
I ask what their names are, but Hypnos says their names are a secret known only to themselves and his Great Mother Nyx.
"There is power in knowing someone's true name," he pats the side of the horse nearest to him and I follow him to follow the light so I do not get lost in the dark. "Not the name placed upon you by your parents or caregivers- but the one held deep in the chambers of your heart. My mother believes deeply in that power and scarcely names anything."
"She named you," I say as I look at his profile, illuminated in the red gold flame of lightbringer and the blue flame of the horse's mane.
"Yes," he smiles as the flames mingle together in a dance of colors on his face. "I suppose she did. There is still time to turn back, if you would like. It will only get hotter from here."
"How is that even possible?" I whisper as I feel the sweat trickle down my back and between my breasts. He laughs a little snort of a laugh.
"Everything is possible."
Of course, Hypnos looked like a boy, but he was ancient and his mother was one of the first beings to wake, surrounded by a misty darkness. Tartarus was nothing to him.
"Shall we go now?" I ask, licking my lips and trying to sound braver than I feel.
Hypnos nods and helps me on the back of one of the horses- her mane of fire is cold to the touch and soothing against the heat. He takes lightbringer and sits on the male, whispering softly into his ear in a language I did not know. I'm not sure what to hold on to so I settle for her neck before she starts to gallop forward.
She jumps from the ledge of the cliff and I clench my eyes shut.
The ride down is not as violent as our initial fall, but it is still long and arduous. My body remains tense and uncomfortable and the cold flame of the mare's mane freezes my fingers into an odd position as her leather wings beat against my legs. When we finally land, I can not move right away and I do not open my eyes until Hypnos places his hand upon my knee.
"You may come down now, My Queen," he says gently and I blink a few times before looking at him.
"It is so hot down here," I state the obvious as I crack my knuckles to get them to loosen up. I can barely breathe, the heat is so thick, and the ground sings a song of nothing and no one.
"Yes," Hypnos says as he helps me down from the horse with his hands around my waist. He is quick to remove them when I find myself settled. "This realm is like the center of the flame."
I'm sweating even more than I ever thought possible and I wish I could take off the rest of my clothes- but I don't think that would actually help at all. The ground is strange. Not soil or stone- but sand. Sharp and biting into my bare feet like a million pieces of glass. I feel like I may sink inside of it, so I grab onto Hypnos' arm to make sure I do not disappear.
The darkness was everywhere and all around- but in the distance I can see an odd orange glow against the horizon. It makes the air crackle and pop and I can also see strange trees with crooked branches silhouetted against it.
"That is the lake of fire," I whisper, having only heard about it in stories.
"It's actually a river," Hypnos corrects me just as Lord Hades had, only his voice is kinder.
The horses let their flames die and they disappear into the darkness behind us. I let Hypnos lead the way and I cling to him tightly because I am afraid and he is not. Hypnos hands me his bronze cape and I use it to cover parts of my face to protect myself from the heat that feels blistering against my cheeks.
"We are almost there," he says as I lean more into him to press against the oppressive air.
I had envisioned flames on top of a great body of water… but the river of fire is actually molten rock. Like the kind that rests deep in the volcanoes of earth…. But it was different somehow. Not a natural wonder, but one formed from magic and desperation. I lower the cape to fully take in its wonder. It is a crackling, slow moving river…. but it is wide. So wide I can not see the other side.
"Hephaestus." I say, thinking of the smith host who spends his time traveling from island to island in the belly of the great volcanoes of earth, forging gifts in the hopes of being accepted.
"Yes," Hypnos replies. "When all saw that Hephaestus was born with a lame leg- Zeus and Hera became enraged at his perceived disability. Convinced that such a babe could not be his, Zeus took the child and threw him into this river. It is one of the only things we can not heal from," he whispers, like others were listening. "Made up of curses and prayers during a never ending war, its magic can not be reversed."
"And Father Zeus threw his own son into it?" I question and Hypnos nods his head, the orange light of the raging river makes him look older and more sinister.
"The screams the poor child made…" he says like he was remembering something awful. "In any case, It was Lord Hades who helped retrieve him- but he was already deformed by the liquid fire. From the moment he was old enough to know what his parents had done- he had claimed the fire as his own."
I think of Hephaestus with his lame leg that drags behind him when he walks. I think of his scorched skin and his marriage to the most beautiful host on Olympus. People thought it a great joke, of course, when he asked for the hand of Aphrodite… but I did not think it was so funny. His talents were great and he had many divine gifts that he used to help mortals and hosts alike…. And I still found him pleasing to look at- as his face favored Mother Hera and Lord Hades- but there was no denying that his body was broken and no divine light could fix him.
But I did not know it was because of father Zeus and I did not know it was because of this river.
"What a sad tale," I say, thinking of a baby being thrown into such a place. "I am glad Lord Hades saved him."
"Yes," is all he says.
Part of the river bubbles and explodes in the distance so I grab Hypnos' hand for comfort. He is uncomfortable with the affection and tells me so… so I pull away. He is right, of course. I am sure Lord Hades would be tempted to throw him the fire if he knew how much I've been touching him.
"There is one more thing I can show you," he says as he leads us down the shore line, over great black stones and more broken glass.
We climb over a few larger rocks and I stop when I see the great ship just beyond.
A double decked war machine rests against the shore. It's made of shining black glass and glowing crystals that hint towards an ancient magic no longer used. It reflects the molten rock and I can see our own reflections when we get closer. Hypnos walks with purpose. His back straight and head held high. I walk in pain, hunched against the heat of the river and covered in his bronze cape.
My hair is wet from all the sweat. Pieces have come loose from my braid to dance annoyingly around my face and my dress is damp. It sticks to me uncomfortably and I keep pulling it away so it does not become baked onto my skin.
Hypnos is not sweating at all and seems hardly bothered by it.
"This is how we get to the wells," he says, nodding to the ship. There are fifty oars sticking out from slots in the middle and its sails are dark red. "It is the only thing that can withstand the cursed magma."
At the prow is a ram's head- his black horns curled and magnificent… in honor of Lord Hades.
"Can I go aboard?" I ask, feeling the pull in my chest.
"I believe our King wishes us to remain on the sand."
Oh, yes.
"If you look," he says, pointing to something in the river. "You can see green and blue."
I squint to see, my eyes watering and burning. I can vaguely see the two glowing colors in the distance, but I have to cover my eyes for a moment when I find it too hard to behold.
"There is an island that holds the wells of the divinity and the first form," he explains as I cover my face with his cape again. "There is not much left of either and the well of power has been empty for a century, at least."
Come and see…
"Is it how you imagined it to be?" He asks curiously. "I find it a very lonely and sad place."
"I don't know," I admit. "It called to me and I found myself curious to see it."
"It called to you?" He says, his voice sounding strange. "Tartarus calls to no one."
"I feel like I'm going to melt," I say instead of answering because the heat is distracting.
I step back and try to fan my face but it's just moving the heat around more so I put his cape completely over my head to protect my skin that feels burned and blistered.
"We should go back," he says suddenly, panicked. "Come–"
I uncover myself to find him gone.
"Hypnos?" I say, looking around. "Hypnos?" I call again- but he does not answer.
Come…
I hear a soft voice and I look towards the large ship. The river has stopped moving- it's slow, bubbling creep suddenly still.
And see….
"Hypnos!" I call as I turn around and raise lightbringer so it will flame to life. Its flame is no longer red gold- it is now a strange green color and I do not know what that means. "Where are you?"
"I'm here," I turn to the ship again when I hear his voice. "Come and see."
Come and see.
I look at the ship suspiciously and take a careful step forward.
"But Lord Hades said…"
"Come and see," he repeats. His voice sounds happy, jubilant even. "I can show you the wells. That is what you came for, yes?"
He throws a ladder off the side of the black glass ship. It moves uncommonly slow like it was wading through thick oil.
"Come and see." He repeats, yet I do not see him at all. I can only hear him. "There is much to behold."
Come and see.
I hesitate. This does not feel right and a sense of foreboding is rising in the pit of my stomach.
"Show yourself," I command as I take another careful step forward. "We must return."
He does not answer- but I hear a strange choking sound that frightens me and I run towards the ship when he calls for help. I stash lightbringer in my bag and climb up the rope only to find the ship's deck completely empty.
"Hypnos?" I ask, but he does not answer.
I look around uncomfortably before I hear the faint cry of a child. No. Not a child. An infant newly formed. I follow the sound to one of the opened hatches and I hesitate as I look inside the darkness. The cries become louder… more distressed… and I know I should not… I know it… but the crying of an infant does something strange to my chest so I hop into the darkness, taking out lightbringer to see the rowing benches and oars… and the body parts.
An arm here. A leg there. A heart. A lung. A head…. Pieces of babies roughly torn apart and drowning in golden blood litter the floor and stain the obsidian planks.
The infants wail in eternal agony as my mother and Lord Hades had done so many ions ago.
Time is a circle. A seductive voice whispers into my ear.
Time.
Cronus.
One… Two…. Three…. Four…. Five… The voice whispers again. Come and see.
I pull myself out of the room and run to the side of the boat only to see Hypnos trying to make his way towards me. But he is stuck… his body shaking against the stillness of his action with his head tilted down and one leg up as he tries to run towards the ship. The distortion of his timeline will not let him move and I climb up on the railing to jump off, but the ship begins moving… it's oars pushing into the molten rock and taking off from the shore before I get the chance to flee.
The river fights against it and becomes violent. Pulsing and spewing its red hot liquid all over the deck so I have to find shelter by the prow of the ship, hiding under one of the ram's twisted horns as the boat sways and rocks and nearly tilts into the inferno. I bring my knees up to my chest and cradle lightbringer close as I clench my eyes shut in fear.
The voice whispers onto my light- but I try my best to ignore it.
Behold. It whispers. Behold the wonder.
I do not know how long it takes to cross the river, but when it finally lands on the damned shoreline, the river pushes the boat violently to land and then starts bursting and exploding all over. I think of Hephesaus and his maimed and scared body- how we can never heal from the river's cursed wounds. So in an attempt to preserve myself, I jump off of the boat and onto the black sand. The molten river creeps onto the shore, bubbling, pulsing, jumping… forcing me to move further and further back until sand becomes dirt, becomes grass, and I find myself in a deep dark forest.
Lightbringers new green light illuminates just what is in front of me and what is in front of me is dying trees and flaccid grass. It flicks back to red as I try to gather my strength and my courage so I can figure out what to do next.
"What a pleasing light you have."
I turn quickly to that deep voice and see a large, bulky man standing near, half hidden by a dying tree.
He has crimson eyes that are blazing in the red torchlight and white gold hair like the titans from a memory. He moves to stand before me completely naked save for two metal bands around his wrists and a sash throne over his shoulder. So strong and finely made, he is awesome to behold... even greater and more inspiring than my father or his siblings.
I go to run, but he grabs my belt and yanks me back violently.
"You smell like the sun." Another man appears in front of me. He has an odd hissing voice and hair shining copper.
The man behind me still holds my belt to keep me in place as I struggle to flee.
"You smell like the earth," says another and I turn to the left where the stranger appears with red eyes gleaming.
He looks so young... like he has barely reached his god's age, but he is ancient... ancient in the way I could never even imagine.
"You smell like the air." whispers the forth who boxes me in on the other side so I am surrounded. This man is just as tall as the first... his hair long and bronze and his eyes as red as the blood of mortals. He has an odd scar running along his face, cutting through his right eye.
"You are..." My voice shakes and I can not complete my sentence out of fear.
"The North." The first man answers.
"The South." Says the younger looking host.
"The East." Answers the bearded one.
"The West." Finishes the bronze haired titan with the scar through his eye.
Hyperion, Coeus, Crius, and Iapetus...I know their true names better than I know my own. They are a warning in the dark to keep children in line and the whispers under a bed... The four corners of the earth who helped mutilate their father is a testament to cruelty and war hard fought.
"Brothers of the dawn and the before that followed the nothing," they answer together and a chill creeps down my spine as they all take a step closer... so close that I can not move and I start breathing heavily in fear as they all reach out to touch me... One loosens my braid to run his fingers through my hair... another dances a hand up my arm... another fiddles with the fabric on my dress... and one rubs my stomach...
"You smell like the great sea," The North says, his chin tilted and his eyes narrowed. Hyperion was once the keeper of light. The High One like his great son Helios, but that had to change when he was thrown in this darkened pit where light could never reach.
"You smell like the unyielding air," hisses the South with his youthful face and wise eyes. Coeus was the first to have an inquisitive mind and the first to seek knowledge outside his own kind... but that did not stop him from picking up weapons against my father and his siblings. His intellect did not help him at all in the bloody war...
"You smell like the wilderness and the plants that grow," says the East as he inhales deeply against my hair. Crius honored all the things of Mother Earth and paid attention to the other worlds that burned in far off distances.
"You smell like the promise of a woman," whispers the scar faced West with his eyes alight with lust as his hand creeps lower to the spot between my thighs. Iapetus was the one of piercing wounds and divine instruments of pain. Many he used to hurt others and more used to hurt himself. He was the titan who fed off of Lord Hades before they lost the war and were damned to the darkness.
"You smell like my child."
The four titans suck in a breath at that chilling voice and all at once they take a single step back to make room for the man who walks along the darkened trees and into my light.
It is Cronus.
He is the most beautiful creature I have ever seen.
With silver hair and blazing eyes so fierce, he is a wonder to behold. The titan before me moves aside to let him view me and the titan behind me finally lets go of my belt. He is so strong looking... so tall and broad shouldered... and so pale... so incredibly pale that I can see the veins underneath his skin creeping over his body like fine spider webs. He looks so kingly in his nakedness. Even though he is covered in the black sand that has settled in the crevices of his body and face, he still seemed dignified and proud. He was a thousand times stronger and a thousand times greater than anyone I have ever known before…
"You are pureblooded," he says, his voice so dark and rattling that I feel weak in his presence. Lightbringer's red flame illuminates his beautiful face and it makes him seem sinister, and heavenly, and terrible, and extraordinary all at once... "A child of my noble children… and smelling strongly of the dark one."
"A very rare thing," says the golden North.
"Very rare, indeed," hisses the South in agreement.
"Indeed," the bronzed East hisses but I can not look at them because I am so awed by Great Cronus and his unparallelled splendor.
"I can always tell, you know," Great Cronus says, a hint of a smile on his well formed lips as he brings his hand up to gently touch my neck with his dirty hands.
His fingernails are black and dirtied, like he used them to dig himself out of the ground.
"The clayborn ones smell like filth," whispers the West with his nose crinkled in disgust.
"No matter how divine their light may be," the North spits on the ground.
"Filthy things," hisses the South with a nod of his head.
"But you smell sweet." The North is quick to add when I glance his way.
"Wonderfully sweet," whispers the scar-faced West with a leer.
"Perfectly sweet," Agrees the East as he inhales deeply again.
"Like me," Great Cronus finishes with a smirk. "Such a perfection rarely achieved is quite a feat indeed."
"Indeed."
"Indeed."
"Indeed."
"Indeed."
"Why have you come here?" The North asks after a brief pause.
"Have you come to release us?" the South asks hopefully, his young eyes sparkling.
"Have you come to free us?" The East laughs like he didn't believe it.
"Wife of the unseen one," the West adds with a deep frosty voice that makes me shake.
"The traitor without mercy."
"The darkest in the pit."
"The sternest in his manner."
"The one with the flaming sword," the West fingers a vicious looking scar on his chest... A deep red wound surrounded by scorched flesh burning green.
"Lord Hades?" I whisper out pathetically and they all laugh.
"Lord Hades," Great Cronus jeers. "A name he chose himself."
"Himself."
"Himself."
"Himself."
"Himself."
"They had no names when I ate them." He smiles at me... and it is the most divine thing I have ever seen. "There was no point."
"No point."
"No point."
"No point."
"No point."
"So they chose the names themselves." He tilts his head, fine silver hair falling over his brow. "Hades." He lets the name roll off his tongue. "A promise of tomorrow..."
"Strong and courageous..."
"Reveling in the unseen abyss..."
"Ordered against Chaos..."
"The hopeful Morning Star..."
"But names change, you know, just as the people who wear them." Great Cronus lets his red eyes dance over my face before resting on my lips. "Hades, the great beacon of light, now means the darkest death of night. And what of you, Persephone?"
"Persephone."
"Persephone."
"Persephone."
"Persephone."
"Innocent and new," he tickles his fingers up my arm. "As sweet as a freshly made flower."
"Hope."
"Love."
"Wonder."
"Possibility."
"I And what does your name mean now?" he asks, tilting his chin down and narrowing his eyes. "The clay born ones whisper prayers onto your light, but it is not out of love, hope, or wonder. It is out of fear. Queen Persephone...your name means death..."
"Decay..."
"Murder..."
"Darkness..."
"Destruction..."
"Do you see that we are not so different anymore, child of mine? My name once meant power. My name once had purpose. What does that name mean to you now?"
I don't answer.
"It means nothing at all. But names change." He whispers like the thought pleased him. I pull my arm away from Great Cronus and his spider fingers. "Do not get excited, my brothers," he warns the others who have started to touch me again. "She can not help us out of here, of course."
"Of course."
"Of course."
"Of course."
"Of course."
"I heard her sweet song from across the great river and it woke me from my slumber. I needed to see for myself… But she can not help us. Not yet."
He reaches out and touches my hair... letting his pale hand comb through the long strands and seemingly thoughtful as he watches it all slide between his fingers.
"She's too young."
"Too weak."
"Too silly."
"Too stupid."
"Too beautiful," Great Cronus cuts into their insults with another pleased smile as he lets his hand drop to my waist. "And that is such a pity, indeed."
"Indeed..."
"Indeed..."
"Indeed..."
"Indeed..."
"Because the world is not kind to beautiful little fools..." I widen my eyes at my mother's words as he steps so close that his chest is right up against mine. I can see each vein... each eyelash... each range of red in his deadly eyes... "...And neither are we."
I scream when one of them blows out the light and then I feel nothing but the cold void of Chaos inside and all around while swimming in the never ending darkness in the deep dark wet as Cronus whispers his damning secrets in my ear.
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A/N: I'm sorry this took so long. I had three children since I last posted and lost a lot of myself to motherhood. I am very tired and haven't had time to focus on much else. I'm slowly getting back, though, so hopefully you enjoy.
