Disclaimer:
Mrs. J.K., It is all yours, I just play with it… for free of course.
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I turned to Harry and grinned, "That memory will set fire to their asses."
Harry shook his head, "Or they will think you are barking mad."
3 Barking up at the wrong tree.
I laughed, "But Harry, I am barking mad! Let me prove it to you."
I changed into my Grim, Sean's father was right, I could pass through for a mix of an Irish Wolfhound and an English Mastiff. I am huge! My shoulders reach three feet, my head is high enough to look into Harry's eyes. One woof was enough to let him fall backward on his ass.
Harry recuperated, "Bloody Hell! What kind of animal are you? You are as big as a horse!"
I changed back, "Well, not as big as a horse, but I am dwarfing a Shetland pony easily. I call it a Grim. You did not see me at my best, I am too skinny to be impressive. This is my animagus form, your father was a stag, and Pettigrew is a rat. I'll tell you about it after lunch."
Xxxxx
At the table, Penny pointed to a set of vials, "These be for Master, those be for young Master. They be good for you. Master is too skinny and young Master is too small. Penny will fix it."
I grumbled, "They probably taste bad."
Penny nodded, "They be tasting bad, Master, that is why Master has to drink a lot of milk. Master has to be an example for Young Master and not complain."
Man, that is one bossy Elf! I almost like Kreacher more, she makes me feel like a naughty toddler. Alright! You don't have to tap your feet like that, I will drink the bloody potions and the milk.
We were allowed to wash the food down with fruit juice after I vented my dislike about milk and Pumpkin juice. Did you ever try that? It tastes like raw pumpkin! Anyway, I wanted to explain my animagus when Penny told us to take a nap.
Penny explained, "Master, potions works best when you sleep, it is good for young Master, and Master must be a good role model."
Harry grinned, he took Penny's side, "Yes, the dog needs a nap and a walk."
"You are lucky that I am sleepy," I grumbled when I lay in my bed, "that brat is clearly James's son."
Xxxxx
The nap and the potions helped, it has been years since I felt so good. When I woke up, I got through the stack of papers Sharpclaw left behind. Malfoy and Narcissa made a mess of it alright, the tricky part is that it was Narcissa's signature on the contract. Lucius was in a holding cell at that time.
Crap, now we have to prove she signed the contract as a regent of House Malfoy. I hope Grandpa was not that stupid, I hope not, that contract is as thick as a book! It will take days before I work myself through the fine print.
That sped up my need to select a lawyer, can I trust Andy to go after her sister? It will look bad in court too, and can backfire when they call it an inner family conflict… I'll hire that other firm.
Harry saved me from my paperwork, he stood at the door and asked, "You were about to talk about how you became an animagus before we were sent to bed by Penny. Can you do it now?"
I nodded, "Take a seat. How to start… well, James and I became friends on the train, although we knew each other from social gatherings, and got sorted to Griffindor with two other boys in our dorm, Pettigrew and Remus Lupin. Four other boys got another room. They split the rooms when there are more than six boys in the same class."
I shrugged, "It was by chance those boys became close friends of us, it could have been two of the other boys if they were in the same dorm as us. No, I think Dumbledore put Remus Lupin in our dorm with a purpose. The way he manipulated your friend Ron to be your friend. I doubt both were aware of the manipulation."
I explained, "You see, Remus Lupin has a condition, he was bitten by Fenrir Greyback when he was five years old. Fenrir Greyback is a Werewolf and loves to turn little kids into Werewolves. Yes, he was the first werewolf admitted at Hogwarts, and he got in the same room as the Heirs of two of the most important Houses."
I held my hand up to stop his questions, "We were never in danger, the nights of the full moon he went to a secluded place to do the change. Anyway, we became close friends, my rebellious side and James's humorous side, combined with the increasing tension between the purebloods, it made us into pranksters."
"Those were the years that Voldemort came into power and rallied the purebloods behind him. Schoolboys are easy targets to let them rebel against the establishment," I pointed out, "some hints about injustice and the threat of Muggles and Muggleborn to their way of life is enough to set them on fire."
I shrugged, "It is a proven tactic of the muggles too, when the country is in a crisis, some ruthless politicians find someone to blame to get supporters and sometimes go to extremes. History is littered with proof that it works. The Witch hunts for example."
"That brings us to the animagus. We found out Remus was a Werewolf, and as loyal friends, we tried to find a solution. Did you know that Werewolves only go after humans and leave animals be? Well, we found out about it and we decided to become animagus and keep Remus company on those nights."
"We succeeded in our fifth year, it was hard work I tell you! The sad part? We found a much easier way after we became animagus. Anyway, we kept Remus company during the full Moons from that day."
My smile disappeared, "As young boys are by nature, we did not see any danger. We started to run in the Forbidden Forest with Remus, Peter on James or my back, the four of us had a blast, we felt free."
"It could not last though, James had a thing for a girl, Lily. From day one he was smitten by her. She was the only one that spoke her mind to him, others were wary of the power of House Potter, and James got a major crush on Lily."
"Lily was not alone, she had a childhood friend from her village. The bad part was that he was sorted in Slytherin, and over the years got in the bad crowd. As a half-blood from a poor family, he had it hard in Slytherin, so he had to blend in or get abused. As boys, we did not realize that, we saw him as a junior Death Eater that targeted muggleborns and half-bloods."
I shook my head, "He saw that James was bothering Lily and that started the feud, Snape had a thing for Lily too, and saw her as his possession."
Harry jumped up, "Wait a minute! Snape? Like in Severus Snape? A greasy bat Snape?"
I looked at Harry and pretended I did not know about Snape, "You know him? He became a Death Eater in our seventh year or right after graduation. Snape showed his true colors to Lily when she saw him bully some Muggleborns. The turning point was when James punished Snape for his bullying by humiliating him in public. When Lily tried to help Snape he called her a Mudblood."
Harry was angry, "He is our Potion professor and is always on my case! He is the head of Slytherin and bullies everyone except Slytherins! Me and Neville are his favorite targets, he keeps on insulting us and… Argh!"
"So, that is the Leader of the Light," I sighed, "Chuck an Auror in Azkaban without a trial and hire a known Death Eater to train the Slytherins into the next generation of Death Eaters. Who needs enemies when you have allies like that?"
I stopped Harry from exploding, "My story is not done yet, pup. Snape was looking for ammunition to get us in trouble and noticed Remus's full moon days. I bet he knew Remus was a Werewolf and where he disappeared to each month. I told him if he wants to know he had to push the knob on the Womping Willow to stop the branches."
I shrugged, "Until this day I don't know if Snape went in there to see Remus or to try and kill him. James found out and dragged Snape back out, saving that grease ball's life. Now I see that Dumbledore took that opportunity to get his hooks on us. He is a Master in guilt-tripping his students."
Harry kept on raging about Snape and his petty behavior, to get his mind to something else I asked, "So, Harry, you never received any mail before your Hogwarts letter? That is not good."
Harry looked puzzled, "No I didn't, why is that not good?"
I explained, "You told me you are called 'The Boy Who Lived' for vanquishing Voldemort, and there are even books about Harry Potter. Where did your Fan Mail go to? There is no doubt that young children have sent you letters or birthday cards, maybe even presents or stuffed animals."
"Think about it, Harry," I said when I saw him frown, "put yourself in their place, Harry Potter is the National Hero, so I sent him letters and a stuffed animal… he never sent me a thank you note! I asked my friends and they say the same! He never sent any letter at all! What a stuck-up prick! I will stop sending letters if he doesn't appreciate them!"
I saw Harry pale, I added, "When those kids are nine or ten, they don't like you anymore. And when you arrive at the train dressed in rags, they see it as a sign that you reject their ways."
I pointed out, "It could also be that someone cast an aversion spell on you so that everyone ignores you, so you fade into the background. Either way, people need to know that you never had any mail and still only receive mail from selected people."
"You mean my mail is tampered with?" asked Harry, "who has that kind of powe… Dumbledore."
I nodded, "Not only your mail, Harry, you said your first Christmas present was a sweater from Mrs. Weasley and your invisibility cloak. Don't you think other classmates would send you a present? Other Heirs send one to establish friendly relations? What about the Alliance? The Potter Longbottom Alliance goes back centuries, there had to be a gift from Neville's Grandmother and your allies."
Harry sagged in his chair, he mumbled, "All to keep me stupid and alone… with Ron and Hermione."
"Yes, with as few friends as possible, although those two could have been manipulated too," I speculated, "you can't fake being a friend for two years. Although Ron is a typical hanger-on, someone who hangs around famous people to get in the spotlight too. He is The Best Friend of the Boy Who Lived!"
Harry groaned, "Stop it, please! Is nothing real in my life? Everything I know is faked? Are you real, Sir? Are you manipulating me too?"
I nodded, "In a way I am. I am manipulating you to think for yourself, to question everything, and take nothing for granted. I told you my side of the story, my point of view. That does not mean that I am right about everything, I am sure there are parts that I don't know about. And call me Sirius, I still feel too young to be a Sir."
I stood up, "Think about it, Harry, there is one certainty though. Dobby is completely on your side. You can trust him. As your Elf, he is bonded to you as a member of your House. His focus is your well-being. Talk to him, he knows the wizarding world and can give you advice. Penny too."
I left the boy with a lot of issues he has to figure out, I admit, I got it all from Fan Fiction, all the conspiracy theories I told Harry were written about multiple times in there. It comes all out on how far will Dumbledore go to control the boy of prophecy. Me in Azkaban was a major boon for that old Bastard, I bet he did everything possible to keep me there.
Xxxxx
The next morning at breakfast, Penny gave me the Prophet. Rita came through, and I got my letter printed on the front page.
Sirius Black is on Strike!
Dear readers! Two days ago, right after Sirius Black escaped Azkaban, we received this letter from him. We have printed it word for word.
To the Good people of Wizarding Britain!
I, Lord Black had enough!
I admit that I let my suspect escape when he blew up the gas pipe, but I was hit by the debris!
That was no reason at all for Bartemius Crouch to station me in Azkaban as an undercover agent with the Death Eater prisoners!
He forgot all about me when his son proved to be a Death Eater and he let me rot in Azkaban for years!
I said I had enough! I refuse to work again until I get paid and can take my holidays!
That is twelve years 24/7 without one day off!
That is 2150 Galleons annual pay! That is only for a ten-hour shift six days a week.
I did double shifts and four extra hours of overtime.
There is a 25% Bonus for Night shifts and weekends. There is also a 15% bonus for overtime.
The 100% Bonus for working on Holidays has to be calculated and the annual raises I estimate to be 10%.
Can you do the math?
I will give you some numbers,
For my normal wagers I am due 46,000 Galleons.
For my double shifts I am due 57500 Galleons.
My overtime comes on 7700 Galleons
For working Double shifts on Weekends I demand 10,000 Galleons.
For working on Holidays 24/7, I demand 20,000 Galleons
My poor lodging and disgusting food, as a Double shift demands two meals to be given to the Auror on duty, was below par. I demand 10,000 Galleons as compensation. Yes, the food was that bad!
The medical care to bring me back to full health will be charged to the Ministry, any lasting health problems will be brought before the Wizengamot.
I did not get the time off to attend my grandfather's funeral and was prevented to take my Lordship or do my duties to my House! For that, I demand 100,000 Galleons.
The Damage caused to my Finances of House Black has yet to be calculated, if I find out any Ministry Worker has profited from that, I will demand compensation with a minimum of 100,000 Galleons.
Not only that, they prevented me from doing my Godfather's duty to my Godson Harold James Potter! I will investigate who took care for my Godson and how he was treated all this time. I demand 100,000 Galleons as a penalty for this insult! A Godfather's oath is Sacred! Interfering with it has to be punished!
To sum it up, the Ministry owes me 451,200 Galleons, to be lenient, I waver the 200 Galleons.
As Lord Black, I demand this to be paid this month. There will be a 10% penalty added each month.
It is time that I set House Black where it belongs, at the top of this society!
I was named as the Magical Guardian in Lord Potter's Last Will after Lady Longbottom, I was prevented from being present at the reading of the Will. I only hope that House Longbottom, Bones, Greengrass, and Lovegood had a good influence on Harry. All of them were named as possible Magic Guardians. I hope they did not let my boy down.
On that All Hallows Eve in 81, I was forced to hand Harry to the Half-Giant Rubeus Hagrid on orders from Dumbledore, I hope that I did not make a mistake on this. Dumbledore was the one who cast the Fidelius Charm and changed the Secret Keeper to Peter Pettigrew when I found out they were hunting me for it. Why did Dumbledore not come forward with that information? I will ask him that personally.
Finally, the Ministry can expect a visit from my lawyers. I demand my compensation and a big apology! Lord Potter and I arrested more than twenty Dead Eaters, and they did not even question me! I was stunned in the back and woke up in Azkaban.
House Black and House Potter are major shareholders of this paper and demand to print this word for word!
I AM LORD BLACK AND DEMAND SATISFACTION!
Dear readers, we did some investigations before printing this letter, Lord Sirius Black did not get a trial at all! He was put in Azkaban on the day of his arrest! In a way he has the right to be paid, he is still an Auror on Duty, they never fired him.
The actions of Dumbledore are suspicious, we asked the families Lord Black named if they raised young Harry, all of them said that Dumbledore blocked the Will and took control over Harry's life. They could not tell us where the boy was raised.
A girl, Miss Daphne Greengrass said that The Boy Who Lived was dressed in rags and was skinny and small when she saw him on the first day on the train. She could not contact the boy because the Griffindor and Slytherin rivalry runs high.
Another girl, Miss Susan Bones said she tried to contact Heir Potter, but his friend told her he did not want to meet her. She stopped trying after that.
Miss Luna Lovegood said the Nargels kidnapped Heir Potter and held him hostage.
This raises more questions than we have answers for, Dear readers, we will investigate this further, after all, House Black and House Potter are major shareholders, we are obligated to find the answers.
Xxxxx
I let Harry read the paper, he said, "I never said that I did not want to talk to them! Greengrass could have said something to me in class, Bones too! Why would Ron tell Bones… Dumbledore! I could have lived with one of them!"
I nodded, "I was told by James that they put Alice Longbottom first. Then me, Amelia Bones, she was our senior Auror and I had a thing with her. The Greengrass and Lovegoods were friends of Lily. Veronica and Pandora were with Lily and a few others in a study group. Marlene McKinnon died and Linda Beckham was a Muggleborn, so they were not named in the Will. I recall Lily saying that an orphanage was better than Petunia."
Harry looked up at me and asked, "What should I do? How can I get this to end?"
I pointed at the paper, "You are a major stockholder, tell them about your life. Say that you read that article and want to tell your side. You can also owl the Greengrass or Bones girls and explain that Ron Weasley acted on his own. Or ask Luna what Nargels are."
I warned Harry, "Don't tell them you are with me, or they think I forced you to write that. I am still a fugitive in their eyes."
Xxxxx
Harry went to his room, to think it over, I bet I have stirred an ants nest with my article. I went to my office and wrote a letter to the Law firm Howe & Dowey & Screwam.
After that, I drew a picture on a piece of paper, I called Penny and showed her the picture, I told her where and how many she should get me.
All those Fan Fiction gave me ideas that I had to try out just once. When Penny came back with a box full of party tricks I grinned, it was time for payback! The rest of the day I was busy with my surprise presents. Although I will wait to give them out yet.
After Dinner, I saw that Harry got restless, "What is the matter, Harry?"
Harry answered, "I feel locked up in this house, it feels unfriendly to me."
I nodded, "It feels unfriendly to me too. The Elves just started to clean this place, there are a lot of dark creatures still in here, they feel hostile toward us, they know we are getting rid of them. Tell you what, dress Muggle style and take your dog for a walk, just hide your hair and scar with a hat, or cap."
Harry looked at me, "I have to walk that cow? I'll get dragged around like a toy!"
I protested, "Hey! Don't sass the Dog! I am housebroken! I had my shots! Your parents took me for a walk plenty of times!"
Harry called Penny, "Penny? Can you bring me a Dog leash? I have to get outdoors with the dog and he might run after a cat."
Penny glared at me, "Dog Master behaves with Heir Black, and do not scare the neighbors."
Huh? That Bossy elf is telling me to behave? She has a point though, if I go after a cat, there is no way Harry can stop me… A Pink leash? With beads and glitter on it? WTF?
Harry grinned at me, "Just perfect for you, what should I call you? Fifi? Chewie? Jabba? Yoda? I know! Big Mac! Or Barkley?"
I glared at Harry, "It is Padfood I have you known! James named me so!"
Harry shook his head, "There are two that know you like that, it is not safe and it is a lame name, choose another one. I vote for Fifi."
Penny nodded, "That be a good name, Muggles will not be scared by a dog named Fifi."
"I ban the word Fifi!" I shouted, "Anything except bloody Fifi!" I sighed, "Penny, go to Gringotts and exchange a hundred galleons into Pounds, they know Kreacher is a Black Elf. That will be your pocket money for this month, Harry."
Harry called out, "That much? What do I do with all that money?"
I shrugged, "Spend it? Go out and find some friends, see a movie, Dobby will be watching over you and me when I am with you. You are not a prisoner here Harry. But go not too far the first days, the Goblins have to check you out for trackers and other problems before you can go out without worries."
Xxxxx
Here is a proud dog taking a walk with his owner! Like a properly behaved dog, I am walking beside Harry, sniffing… FOOD! I dragged Harry to a food stall and begged for a hot dog.
Harry complained, "You just ate, you big log! How can you be hungry already?"
The woman behind the stall chuckled, "Aye boy, big dogs like those are always hungry."
Harry caved in, "Fine, one for me and one… stop pushing me! Two for him, make them extra spicy… auw! OK, not spicy at all. Jeesh, talk about a picky eater."
Two Hot-Dogs, later we continued our stroll, sniff? A cat! There! "Behave or we are going home, buster! Now be nice."
I hate cats, useless critters, kids bring them home and dad needs to take care of them. On top of that, they used to be domesticated to hunt mice and rats, now those blasted cats hunt mice outside and bring them in to play with. Sniff… that bitch is in heat! Check out that fine poodle! Trimmed and all! Why is that bitch avoiding me? Am I not good enough?
Ah people, Harry-sized, those are fine-looking bitches… girls. Dragging Harry along, sit, give paw to the girl that is not screaming her lungs out, tongue out of my mouth sideways, that makes me more friendly, I saw that in a cartoon once.
One of the girls shouted, "Can't you control that monster? Why would that beast run to us like that?"
Harry made an excuse, "Sorry Miss, but Fifi's previous owner was a girl and he is used to being around girls all the time. I guess he is missing her and wants to find new friends, you have the same perfume as her, that is what attracted him to you. Can I offer you all something to get over the scare? Fifi doesn't hurt a fly and is well behaved, I'll show you."
Harry got in front of me and said, "Fifi! Stand! Good boy, now Sit! Beg! Give a paw! Now apologize to the pretty misses for scaring them!"
Huh? How do I do that? I'll improvise, I got in front of the Misses and wagged my tail, lowered my front paws, so my ass stuck up and my tail was wagging like crazy, a bit of whining, and I am forgiven!"
One of the girls asked, "We never saw you here in the neighborhood, it is hard to miss a dog like that. Are you new here or visiting?"
Harry answered, "My name is Harry, I just moved in with my Godfather, my aunt did not like my dog, so he offered us a place to live. Now, are you the local beauties? Can you tell me where the good spots are? I still have to treat you for scaring you with Fifi, remember?"
Smoothly done, Harry! Four babes at once! WTF? They went inside a Video game arcade and let me wait outside the door! Hmm, I better lay down, so I don't scare the customers.
It is hot in the sun… thirsty… what the bloody hell is keeping that boy? Got to pee… that is the last time I played Wingman god damned! He will be barking at the wrong tree if he doesn't hurry up. Bored… still have to pee… bloody teenagers forgetting all about me. I bet he is going after pussy.
