"I don't want to go to school today."

Naruto has barely been awake for five minutes, and he's already freaking out.

Kakashi blinks at him sluggishly, still half asleep. Last night's dose of the fever meds has worn off; they're waiting for the next dose to kick in. The fever has made him a little bit groggy. "What?"

"I don't want to go to school today," Naruto repeats, scratching at the new scar on the side of his head, agitated. "School sucks. Actually, I don't wanna- I don't wanna go back to the village at all. I want to stay here."

It scares him, actually, how unfamiliar his village suddenly seems to him. He'd thought things were simple – unpleasant, but simple – but now, he's learned that he doesn't know what the people in Konoha are thinking at all. Apparently, they've been lying to him about his parents all his life. The thought of having to look them in the eyes with that knowledge-

It's a lot, is all. And Naruto doesn't like it. And also, he got the crap beaten out of him the last time he was in Konoha. Going to school means seeing those kids again. Which also sucks.

Kakashi makes a non-committal noise. "I guess I get that." He smothers a yawn behind his hand. "But you have to go anyway."

"What for?" Naruto demands. "You said you were going to teach me stuff, Kakashi-san!"

"Mm. I will."

"So why do I have to-"

"Because I need to be alive in order to teach you stuff," Kakashi says, "and you need to not be in prison. Which means that we need to not run the risk of someone coming to look for you. Which means…"

"Which means I have to go back," Naruto finishes his sentence begrudgingly. "But I skip school all the time! It wouldn't be that suspicious."

Kakashi looks at him, calculating. "If you go to school today," he says, "we can practice your ninjutsu afterwards."

Naruto knows he's being manipulated, and he hates that it works. "Fine," he replies, crossing his arms; Kakashi smirks at him.

"You might want to get going, if you want to be on time," Kakashi says, closing his eye. "There's still blood in your hair and on your clothes. You may want to wash up before you go to school."

Naruto exhales a long sigh, then gets up and drags his heavy backpack onto his back.

"Good luck," Kakashi tells him as he leaves. "I know this isn't easy. I'm sorry you have to go back." He gives a huffed laugh. "If it means anything: you're braver than I would be in your position."

It means something. "Thanks. See you later."

Naruto watches the sun rise as he makes his way back to Konoha. The forest is a nice shade of dark orange, and he finds that focusing on that eases his anxiety a little.

It stops working as the gates come into view, though. He can see a handful of shinobi from here, all adults. Involuntarily, he wonders: did those shinobi know about his parents? Was it easy for them to keep that a secret for ten years?

He instantly feels nauseous. He hides behind a bush, grimacing. Kakashi said that Naruto is brave, but Naruto suddenly isn't sure if that's really true. He feels like he's going to cry.

He shakes his head and sucks in a deep breath, puffing out his chest. He'll just run home in a straight line, he decides. He won't talk to anyone. He won't look at anyone. Maybe when he's home and has taken a shower, he'll feel calmer.

Before he can change his mind, he leaps out of the bushes and sprints towards the gates.

His plan is interrupted almost immediately. The moment he enters Konoha, someone grabs his wrist.

Already agitated, Naruto yells out and uses his momentum to blindly send a punch towards the person's crotch. The person dodges with a curse and grabs Naruto's other wrist as well.

"Seems he's okay enough to fight," the person says to someone else, and Naruto recognizes his voice: he's one of the guards, the same one that tried to check on him after his classmates beat him up. Kotetsu was his name, he thinks?

The other guard was standing a bit ahead, but he approaches now and kneels down to Naruto's level. Naruto bares his teeth at him. "The Hell do you want with me?" he snaps.

The other guard raises his hands in a placating gesture. "We're under orders to bring you to the Hokage," he says. "That's all."

Naruto's stomach goes cold. No. No, he can't face Hiruzen. Not now. Kakashi said that Hiruzen was probably the one who decided that nobody could tell Naruto about his mom and dad. Naruto cannot be in the same room as him and act like he doesn't know that.

"I'll talk to Hokage-jiji some other time." Naruto gives the two guards a challenging glare. "I promise, all right? Right now, I just want to go home and take a shower and then go to school. So let me go."

The two guards share a look, and then, Kotetsu shifts his stance to lift Naruto off the ground by his armpits.

Naruto kicks at him, yelling. "Get your hands off me, you dickbag-"

"Sorry, kid," Kotetsu says, and he kinda does sound genuinely apologetic but Naruto is past caring. "Hokage's orders. Izumo, would you-"

The next thing Naruto knows, he's being carried like a sack of potatoes underneath Izumo's arm, butt forward. His brain quickly offers some ways to fight back – grabbing his leg and making him fall, punching him in the back of the knee, trying to hit the chakra point in the thigh – but each method involves being dropped, having to make a run for it and then continuing to not get caught. The Hokage wants the guards to bring Naruto to him. They'd always find him again.

Begrudgingly, Naruto lets Izumo carry him.

The original author of this story is ihopethelightwillshineupon on AO3. If you're seeing this story on YouTube, that means that the account that posted this video did so without the author's consent. Dear viewer, please realize that you're watching stolen content.

(This note was added because YouTube accounts keep reposting this fic without asking... and without reading it first. I'm hoping they'll blindly copy and paste this note into their video, exposing themselves to their viewers. Lmao)

He's taken to Hiruzen's home instead of his office, which is actually a huge relief, because the Hokage's office is above the Academy and Naruto does not want his classmates to see him being dragged around like this.

Naruto has been to Hiruzen's home before. He knows that it's massive on the outside, but that most of the rooms on the inside are mostly filled with secret documents and stuff. Since those rooms are always locked up, the space that Hiruzen actually lives in is relatively small. Still massive, still ten times as large as Naruto's apartment, but small enough to be cozy. Naruto never felt intimidated by the huge building.

As the looming shape of the building comes into view, Naruto realizes that he feels intimidated now.

His only solace is that the guards seem intimidated, too. As they reach the front door, they nod their chins at each other in turn with increasing intensity, before Izumo sighs loudly and knocks. "Hokage-sama!" he calls. "Uzumaki Naruto has returned."

"The door is unlocked," Hiruzen's voice comes from one of the open windows. "Come in. I am in my office."

Izumo carries Naruto inside, Kotetsu leading the way. The hallway smells strongly of food. Hiruzen's cook must be busy making breakfast, then. He has a few staff members: a cook and someone who cleans the place, and the rest are ANBU who guard the forbidden documents. There's probably about a dozen of them in total, though Naruto has never been certain of the number of ANBU. The staff all work hard to keep the Hokage mansion safe and clean, and to make sure the Hokage exclusively eats fancy-ass food. Naruto tries hard to pretend he's not hungry.

The Hokage's home office is a familiar place as well. The first door to the left leads to a room that's covered in bookcases on one side and drawers with scrolls on the other side, with a desk in the middle of the room. It looks impressive, but Naruto knows that nothing in here is valuable. It's just Hiruzen's personal collection of historical fiction.

Hiruzen sits at the desk, watching the guards enter. Izumo quickly puts Naruto down, and Naruto immediately turns around to scowl at the guards. When he turns to look at Hiruzen again, he's smiling fondly.

It feels exactly as horrible to see him as Naruto had expected.

Hiruzen opens his mouth to speak, but Naruto can't let him. His brain would probably explode. "Why do you want me here, old man?" he snaps before Hiruzen has the chance to say anything. "I'm gonna be late for school."

Hiruzen looks surprised, but the expression turns into a smile again almost immediately. "I wanted to see for myself whether you're all right." Hiruzen turns to the two guards. "Would you go and inform Iruka-sensei that Naruto will be late?"

The guards give a bow to Hiruzen. They leave with an awkward look towards Naruto. Naruto sticks his tongue out at them as they close the door behind themselves.

Hiruzen watches him, looking vaguely amused. "They are sorry for what happened yesterday, you know," he says.

"They told you?" Naruto asks. He's not sure how to feel about that.

"They told me that you ran out to the forest." Hiruzen leans back in his chair. "And that you were hurt, and that they didn't keep you from getting hurt."

"Well, I guess it's not their job to give a crap about me," Naruto allows with a grumble.

"It is not," Hiruzen agrees with a nod. "Still, it would be nice if the people in this village helped other people in this village, regardless of whether it was their job to do that, wouldn't it?" He turns to the window. "I told Izumo and Kotetsu that, too. The looks on their faces were quite amusing."

Naruto realizes abruptly that he'd normally laugh at that comment, so he quickly does. It sounds forced. It sounds like he doesn't want to be here.

Hiruzen doesn't seem to notice, though; he turns back to look at Naruto. "I assume you haven't eaten breakfast yet?"

Naruto shakes his head. Damn it, now he's hungry again.

Hiruzen smiles and continues: "Good thing I asked for extra food this morning, then. Eat with me, would you?"

Naruto thinks about protesting – it's torture to even imagine continuing this small-talk with Hiruzen like he didn't keep a crucial secret for ten years – but his stomach growls before he can get a word out of his mouth.

Hiruzen laughs. "I'll take that as a yes," he says. "Unfortunately, it'll be another few minutes before the food is ready to eat. Why don't you take a shower first? You can use the guest bathroom."

Naruto plucks at the front of his jacket, which is covered in dirt and specks of blood. "Maybe after breakfast," he says. "I should put on some clean clothes at home."

Hiruzen gives a mysterious smile and walks over to his desk. From a drawer, he takes a bundle of blue-and-yellow fabric. When Naruto raises an eyebrow at him, he explains: "These are for you. Some new clothes. I had intended to give them to you at the end of the month, along with your allowance, but I suppose now is as good a time as any."

Naruto walks over slowly, feeling like he should be suspicious. He needs to consciously remind himself that, until last night, Hiruzen was always one of the only good guys of Naruto's story. He's always been kind like this. He's never mistreated Naruto. Naruto shouldn't feel on edge.

Somehow, that knowledge makes it worse.

"Thanks," Naruto murmurs, and he takes the clothes from him. The fabric feels clean and sturdy and new.

He knows where the guest bathroom is, so he hurries to lock himself in there before he has to look Hiruzen in the eyes again. Once the door is closed, he leans against the door and clenches his jaws. Now that he's alone, the whole ordeal is catching up to him – his sudden distrust towards Hiruzen, the energy it costs to not let his betrayal show, the realization that he'll never view one of the least awful people in his life the same way he did before. It makes him want to escape through the window and sprint back to the forest and hide and cry.

He can't, though. He's already decided that running away is not an option. He'll just have to play along.

He cranks the shower's temperature up as high as it'll go, because if he can't yell at Hiruzen's face, the least he can do is use up his hot water out of spite. The water immediately runs pink with dried blood, though it takes a lot of scrubbing before he's washed all of the blood off. Even when he feels like he's washed himself pretty thoroughly, he still finds blood in the creases of his palm, underneath his nails, in his eyebrow, in his ear. Naruto decides to use up Hiruzen's stupid flowery soap as well.

Naruto takes his time, enough so that the entire large bathroom is filled with steam by the time he's done. He wraps himself in a fluffy towel and sits on the floor, to examine his new clothes and to procrastinate actually putting them on.

It's a dark blue hoodie and dark blue pants, a matching set. The hoodie has yellow sleeves, and little yellow leaves embroidered along the back.

The clothes are… nice. Far too nice. Naruto touches the little leaves on the hoodie with his fingertips and sighs. He can already imagine himself ruining these clothes. He'll have to go home and put on different clothes after this, he decides. He can't wear this to school.

He's still sitting on the floor, hesitating, when Hiruzen knocks on the door and tells him that breakfast is ready. Despite everything, Naruto manages to force himself to put on the clothes.

They're nice. He thinks he would've preferred it if they were lined with poison ivy.

Hiruzen waits in the kitchen, where the table is covered in different dishes. It feels like a punch to the gut to be faced with Hiruzen again, but-

But some sort of ravenous instinct completely overrides his rage and suddenly his mouth is filled with egg and warm rice and his head is filled with nothing but contentment.

"Eat slowly, or you'll give yourself a stomachache," Hiruzen says with a smile, but he doesn't butt in further than that. He doesn't even tell Naruto to mind his manners when he puts down his chopsticks and eats his rice with his hands.

He hadn't even realized he was this hungry. Maybe he's just been using up more energy than usual, lately. Maybe the emotions he's been through these past days – almost losing Kakashi to his illness, finding out about his parents – pushed away his hunger.

It's really good food. Naruto doesn't dislike the food he normally eats, not at all, he likes ramen a lot. But there's something about eating the same food every day – even food that he likes – that makes food like this taste even better. He even eats the vegetables.

Hiruzen decides he's eaten enough before Naruto does, probably to leave more food for Naruto – which is nice, why does he have to be so nice? – and lights his pipe. Thoughtfully, he sits back and exhales a cloud of smoke.

"If you hadn't come back when you did," he says, "I would have sent someone to look for you."

Naruto looks up at the comment, considering. In a way, it's good that nobody came after him – they would've found Kakashi, and that would've been ugly. But, on the other hand-

"Why not send someone after me immediately?"

Hiruzen gives Naruto a wry smile. "I am certain you're clever enough to figure that out by yourself."

How wonderfully cryptic. Naruto crosses his arms and stares up at the ceiling, thinking. Because nobody gives a damn, that's the short answer – but even if nobody wanted to come look for him, they would've had to if the Hokage ordered them to. Some unwilling shinobi would've been forced into the forest to look for a kid they didn't like.

It's uncomfortable to imagine how that would've ended. If they'd found Naruto, they probably would've manhandled him all the way back to the village. Probably would've held him upside down like that guard did this morning, or something worse. That would've been unpleasant, with that nauseating headache that he had for most of the night.

"Yeah, well," Naruto admits, "maybe it's for the best that no one came looking for me."

Hiruzen gives a nod. "I had faith you'd be all right," he says. "You have spent the night in the forest before, and you heal fast. For the sake of your wellbeing, I figured it would be best to trust your abilities."

Something doesn't feel right about that. Naruto chews slowly, suddenly feeling like he can't swallow.

"How did you know I've spent the night in the forest before?"

Hiruzen smiles mysteriously. "There is little that happens in this village without me knowing about it," he replies.

Naruto's brain connects the dots fast. The guards must've been keeping track of when he left and came back after all. They said they weren't, but of course they were lying, how did Naruto not realize before?

"You're not in trouble," Hiruzen continues. "Academy students are supposed to stay in the village for their own safety. But I know you can keep yourself safe out there, and I know the forest is a place you like to be. I don't want to take that from you."

Naruto half expects him to follow that up with a "but", but he doesn't. "That's nice of you."

"Your happiness is important to me. If spending time in the forest is what's needed to make you happy, then you should be allowed to spend time there."

There's something hanging between them, some sort of tension, a question Hiruzen meant to ask but hasn't yet. Naruto has started getting really good at sensing when someone is keeping something from him.

"Hey, jiji?"

"Yes?"

Naruto swallows his mouthful of food. "You never really answered my question."

Hiruzen raises his eyebrows. "What question?"

"I asked you why you wanted me to be here."

The old man smiles. "I said that I wanted to see for myself whether you were all right, remember?"

Naruto makes a grumbling noise. Not the right answer. "I don't think that's true."

"Why do you think that?"

"Because you've been lying to me my whole life," is what Naruto wants to scream, but he doesn't. "Just 'cause."

Hiruzen takes a drag from his pipe, watching Naruto thoughtfully, and exhales a cloud of smoke. "Very perceptive of you, Naruto," he says eventually, and Naruto's breath freezes in his chest. "Though you're not fully right. I did want to make sure you're okay. That wasn't a lie." He takes a sip of his tea. "But I also called you here because there was something I wanted to ask you."

Naruto steels himself. "What did you want to know?"

"Again, you're not in trouble," Hiruzen repeats. "Nothing bad will happen if you answer me, and nothing bad will happen if you don't."

"Spit it out, would you?"

Hiruzen takes another drag from his pipe. Naruto realizes abruptly that he's preparing himself to speak. He seems hesitant to ask.

What the Hell kind of question would-

"Does the name Hatake Kakashi sound familiar to you?"