Chapter 13
Clarke, Raven and Octavia were in Raven's little workshop after dinner. Clarke needed the break and Raven could tell. She was worried about her friend. Octavia was just happy to be out of medical. She was a little weirded out now by having red blood, and Raven had to continually stop her from cutting herself to see it. Clarke wanted to laugh at her, but she felt like she needed to do something else. They could both see the trouble in Clarke's eyes, so they decided to be good friends and ask her about it.
"What's up, Griff?" Raven started as she dropped whatever tech she was working on back to the bench.
"I feel strange now," Clarke answered as she dropped down on the stool next to Raven's main work bench.
"Strange how, Griff?"
"I don't know how to explain it," Clarke replied.
"Try," Octavia demanded as she moved closer to her.
"I think that you are the only one that understands," Clarke started.
"You need to get out of the camp and spend some time in the wilderness?"
"I guess, maybe, but there is so much to do," Clarke lamented. "Raven has to finish talking with Vincent, so she can get further into and disrupt everything and anything that the Mountain can try to do that could hurt us. And, you, Octavia, have to go inside the belly of the beast. I know that it is going affect you. How can it not? We managed to finally get you out from under the floor only for me to ask you to go back under. I know that Lexa is here with me, but she needs to meet with Anya and Indra to make sure that everything is still good beyond the Mountain. Lexa still needs to go back to Polis and keep the ambassadors in line and the clans happy. There is so much to do and feel like I'm still not doing enough to make sure that we survive all this."
"You are doing more than enough, Clarkey," Raven told her as she reached over to give her a side hug.
"How am I?"
"Well, you've finally told us all about the coming Death Wave. We're all here to help you and we are. We want to help, so we are. Yes, it is true that I'm working with Vincent. We are looking over the systems to make sure that we can alter the acid fog and stop it before Dante gets the idea that he should use it against us. We are going to make sure that they don't arm up against us," Raven explained. "Vincent is going to be my eyes and ears in places that I can't see with the computers and cameras. He is helping us, because he knows that it is the right thing to do."
"And, I am going to work with him as well. I am not just going in as an ambassador, but that is what we are telling Dante. Because we think that they need to know more about how things are going to work once they are back in the sunlight and on the ground. We both know that it is going to be hard for them."
"But, you are also going in there as a Trojan Horse," Clarke countered.
"True, has Vincent been exposed yet?" Raven questioned.
"Mom is working on an inoculation for those coming out for treatment first, but I am not sure that it will work. It might delay the symptoms or make them milder. Octavia is a carrier but asymptomatic. They'll blame Vincent for it once he's back inside, so we might need to expose him before we send him back."
"I'll talk with him and Maya," Octavia stated. "It might help if he understands what is going to happen."
"And, they'll need to know the mortality rate is null. The children will be our first priority. We say that we have a vaccine or something for it. We will use this to help spin getting them all out first, but I need to go with you to talk to them. We still need names for the next selections," Clarke replied.
"And, you need some time off," Octavia added. "I'll find Lexa and see what we can arrange. Stay here with Raven and try to talk it out. Plan what you need from the Mountain, so that we can go back to Vincent and Maya for it. But, you'll also need to talk to the other three. We can be seen to playing favorites."
"We aren't," Clarke countered. "Kane has been talking with Lovejoy about the Mount Weather Security Detail and how they could possibly be integrated into our own Guard. It's a pipedream, but it has the man talking."
"And, the other two?"
"A cook and water treatment worker," Raven added from memory.
"Jasper?" Clarke suggested.
"What about him?"
"Get him to talk to them?" Clarke asked.
"That would put him near Maya, Clarke," Octavia warned.
"He'll find her anyway. We can just help the process a little. Besides, he can just talk to them. We can also pull...your former friend, Kara Cooper, to talk with them, but I'm not sure that she is a good candidate to be in any form of ambassadorship," Clarke replied.
"Hell no, float her, why was she allowed to come down?"
"Her father and husband are still alive," Raven stated. "And, as long as they are, she'll do what we want. As soon as they die, she'll look for the best way to survive and follow that leadership until death. She's not completely useless until then. But, neither her father or her husband work with the water, farm, or food service. Hell, did we ever keep Nygel alive?"
"Yes, because she will be useful in the bunkers," Clarke added. "She's gruff, but she has her uses. And, if needed, she can keep Cooper in line."
"Wow," Octavia said. "Never thought that using Cooper would ever be a good idea, but if she hasn't turned, we can try it."
"Talk to her, Reyes, feel her out. And, find Jasper. And, maybe the Greens, Mr. Green could be a good one to work with those coming from the Mountain."
"He would," Raven replied.
"Good, it's settled. Let's work on this and we'll meet again after dinner. I think I need some sleep," Clarke told them.
"I'll walk you to you tent. Lexa is probably back from training on the far side of camp by now with her guards. She'll want to see you," Octavia said. "Besides that, I need to head back to the infirmary for a few more tests before dinner according to your Mom."
"Okay," Clarke said as she stood up. "Later, Reyes."
"See you at dinner with a smile on your face, Clarkey."
"Or what?"
"I'll put one on it for you," Raven teased.
"I'm sure you will," Clarke answered as she and Octavia started out of the workshop.
Once they were far enough away from Raven's, Octavia took stock of their leader. She could tell that Clarke was tired, but it was more than needing sleep. Her mind and soul were tired. She could understand it with all the rebirths. It was taking its toll. They needed to get this right this time. She wasn't sure how many more times that Clarke could go through with this before she just snapped. Being immortal, in what ever form it was for them, sucked ass.
She could also tell that there was more that Clarke wanted to say, but she hadn't. It wasn't that she didn't trust Raven. She did. They both did. It was the fact that she knew that Raven hadn't been through this as many times as they had. When Clarke got like this, it was only Octavia, Echo and Lexa that she wanted. Octavia just hoped that Lexa could still get through to her, even though this wasn't "her" Lexa. For Clarke, it didn't seem to matter.
"Will you talk to Lexa tonight?" Octavia asked her as they stopped in front of her tent.
"About?"
"What is troubling you?"
"I don't know," Clarke answered truthfully.
"If I can get to Echo, will you talk to her?"
"O," Clarke started.
"Look. I know that you want to do this all yourself because we haven't ever really shown you how much we appreciated what you've done in the past, but I do appreciate it. I know what you are going through. I know that you might not want to talk to me, but you're my best friend Clarke. I'm suffering through just like you are. I might not have been reborn as many times as you have, but I get the feeling of wrongness that comes over you. I feel it, too."
"What do you do?"
"Go camping," Octavia stated.
"Unfortunately, right now, that isn't an option."
"And, if it was?"
"Then, I would go, but I would have to be selective on who I take with me," Clarke answered.
"I'll see what I can do with the rest. At the very least, I'll try to buy us some time in TonDC. I'm sure being there will help," Octavia stated. "Do you want me to call Gaia and have her come here?"
"She will refuse to blend in, O. No, leave her to her machinations. We'll have her back soon. Besides, she'll just tell me to meditate."
"Couldn't hurt," Octavia suggested with a hopeful look on her face.
"Couldn't really help, right now, either. I know what I need to do. I know what needs to happen. Meditation isn't going to give me the answers."
"Maybe you need to talk to Wanheda en Keyron, though."
Clarke looked at her like she was crazy. She knew that she wasn't, but Clarke didn't like to dive deep into her psyche. She was afraid of what she might find there. There were even lives that she didn't want to revisit, lives that no one knew about because she never spoke of them, lives where she let Wanheda run free and be a menaice to all, scorching the Earth just to do it. No, meditation wasn't really an option right now. She wasn't prepared to deal with the darkness that lurked inside. She knew that she had control over it, but that didn't mean that the demon didn't want to play. It thirsted for the blood of the Mountain, saying it was owed to her lover and their people. It wasn't wrong, but her conscience could kill them all. She knew that it wouldn't solve the past.
"The dead are gone, the living are hungry," Clarke mused.
"Just think about it," Octavia offered. "I'll be back by dinner to get you. Khalan and Jacov are on guard. Do not leave the tent without them, me, or Lexa."
"Got it," Clarke replied.
"Rest. Dinner will be ready before you know it. I'll take care of things until then. Just rest," Octavia told her.
Clarke nodded and reached out for her arm. They shook in the Grounder fashion. Octavia waited until she was in the tent to walk away. She just hoped that Clarke actually tried to rest. She knew she wouldn't. Instead, Octavia knew, she would pouring of the maps and plans that she and Lexa cooked up every night to see what they needed to change based on today's events. Octavia predicted that when she came back for her, she'd find Clarke at the desk working. She hoped that she was wrong, but she doubted it. Khalan and Jacov both nodded, letting Octavia know that they had her for now. It was the best that she could do. They were already "inducted in the cult of Wanheda," so she knew that they would let no physical harm come to Clarke. But, they couldn't stop her brain, memories, or the torment of the thousands of souls that Clarke was trying to save...once again. Octavia left Clarke in their care as she went to find someone to talk to about Clarke.
She wondered if Abby would be a good person to talk to, but she didn't think that Clarke would appreciate it. Abby would go to her immediately, forgoing all the medical care that needed to be given. Clarke and Octavia both knew it. Abby was still trying to make up for the lives that Clarke didn't have her by her side. There was nothing that Abby could do, and Clarke had come to realize it. Abby loved her, and she'd proven that she would do anything to protect her daughter when she took Octavia's blood and helped them in their last life together. Octavia knew that Abby would mean well, but she might push Clarke past the brink that she was already standing on. Abby would be someone that she could go, but that she didn't need to go to Clarke at the moment.
Octavia knew that the best to talk to her now, if she wouldn't speak to her, would be Lexa or Echo. Echo was still dealing with things in Azgeda and bringing the survivors of Farm Station to TonDC. Indra had her hands full, Octavia knew. She knew that Echo would come running if called for, but there were other things that needed to be done. Echo was also a member of Lexa's Royal Guard. She was needed to be there with Indra to keep the peace between the two peoples until they could moved to Arkadia. So, in process of elimination, Lexa was the only one that she could go to. But, Lexa had her own issues to deal with as well. While she was posing as a Lieutenant in the Ark Guard, she was still Heda to the Kongeda and the twelves clans. Lexa however had learned to use those around her to help her command. Indra was testament to that. Luna and Anya were others.
Getting to Lexa and getting her to Clarke would be the easiest route, but she wasn't sure that Clarke would be thankful for it. She knew that Lexa would do anything for Clarke. She'd seen it with her own eyes. She knew that their love ran deep. And, she knew that it was wrong to use against them, but Clarke needed Lexa's love and support now. She needed to get out of the camp and just breathe for a few days. Octavia knew that Lexa was the only one that could grant that while the rest of the Twel kept the machine moving towards dealing with the Mountain and its downfall. Lexa could get her to do things that others could not. Shaking her head, Octavia turned towards the training yards. She would just have to go see Abby later and check on the days events of the others that had been getting the serum treatment. Lexa was needed now, Abby could wait, and this would give her time to talk with Abby while Lexa was with Clarke. By the time she was done with Abby, it would be near enough to dinner to get Clarke.
As she neared the training yards, she could already hear the shouts and grunts of the men and women training. She was not surprised that those of the 100 that had come with Clarke to help those who were building Arkadia training. There were Ark Guards, the selected members of Lexa's Royal Guard and armies, Indra's own Gona from TonDC, and some of the other survivors of the Fallen Ark. They were all training together and mixed up. Lexa was lording over them, in what Octavia could only believe was the same way that she taught the young Natblidas. Octavia stopped at the railing and watched. She knew better than to enter until she was acknowledged.
She looked around and saw that Lexa was using Mezi and Tris to help her. She knew that that Ark Guard were taking it personally that the little fourteen year old or younger, Tris, was basically wiping the floor with them. The 100 were doing all the moves correctly and efficiently. It was a testament to the training and their want to learn. She saw that Major Byrne was coming to look over the training. Octavia knew that she ordered every member of the Guard to train with one of Lexa's chosen at least two hours a day. When Major Byrne took a spot next to her, Octavia knew that the training for now was about to be over.
"Blake," Byrne greeted her as she leaned against the rail next to her.
"Major," Octavia replied.
"Are the Guard looking better?"
"I'm not sure. I haven't been training with them today. I'm getting ready for my mission," Octavia told her.
"Oh," Byrne replied. "Is there anything that I need to be aware of?"
"No."
"So, you aren't going to tell me?"
"No."
"Why not?" Byrne asked her.
"Because you aren't my commander," Octavia stated.
"And, Clarke and Lexa are?"
"Yes," Octavia answered.
"I see."
"No, I don't think you do, Byrne, but you will," Octavia said as she saw the moment that Lexa recognized that they were both there at the rail, waiting.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"I think that you need to speak with Kane and Abby again about how things are different down here. The Council that you knew has no power here, because none of you know how to survive here. You also don't understand the politics of the ruling parties," Octavia explained.
"And, Clarke does?"
"Yes, she does. In fact, Lexa is basically the end all and be all when it comes to their government. She is the supreme leader that they refer to as Heda. It literally means 'Commander,' so yes, she is my commander, your commander, all of our commander. Her word is law. But, she is also brokering a peace and a chance for our people to join her people in the Kongeda. This will not only give us trade with the other twelve clans, it will give us peace and armies should something happen to us. What happens to one, happens to us all. Lexa will not let us suffer through the harshness of winter that is coming. We will supply medicine and technology, but the one caveat that even Clarke has agreed to is the usage of firearms will stop."
"Why?"
"It isn't their way. Those in power when the bombs fell used firearms. They are seen as evil and the item that helped bring about the destruction of man. Those people training ours how to fight their way have been here since the bombs and survived. So, we would stupid not to learn from them. But, Lexa is also a visionary, Byrne. She can see that the usage of firearms might be needed later. For now, we will keep them and they will stay inside the fence and only for defensive purposes only. A small amount of their people will come here and learn to use them, not their entire armies. We can't supply them and we all know that the bullets are finite," Octavia explained.
"But, won't we need them to hunt?"
"No, we won't. We will learn to use a bow, spear, and knives like the clansmen. We will learn to survive or die."
"Afternoon, Major. I hope all is well with the perimeter. You just missed the end of training," Lexa told them both as she walked up to them, sensing that Major Byrne might not be so accepting of their presence inside the camp after all.
"Lieutenant," Byrne clipped out. "How are the Guard doing?"
"They are coming along well. The training they received in the sky has helped them learn to adapt to our training here. There are a few standouts among them. I would like to personally train them after hours if possible. Well, maybe not myself, but one of my personal guards. This would bring more acceptance among the clans was I to take a few of the Guard into my own personal guard, once your leaders have sworn allegiance in Polis," Lexa told her.
"And, what would that make me?"
"Once everything is done, since you are the commanding officer of the Guard, Major Byrne, you would be respected among all the generals of the clans as one as well. This would mean that you would be in charge of caring for the Guard and your populace, protecting from any threats, foreign or domestic, and sending a decent response should Arkadia be called upon for any issues that the Kongeda needs them for," Lexa answered. "While our people might not understand what the rank of major is, they will respect the position."
"I see. And, what ranks do your people use?"
"Well, I have my generals. They have captains. The captains may or may not have lieutenants. Beyond that, it is really up to the clan what the ranks are."
"So beyond officers, you have no formal ranks?" Byrne questioned.
"Not in the sense that you do, no. We have fos en sekkens. First and seconds, firsts are the trainer and seconds are the apprentices. Tris, there," Lexa stated pointing out the young warrior, "Is my trusted General Anya's sekken. She is young by your standards, but I was much younger when I was put into Anya's care. She raised and taught me how to fight. I won the Conclave and with it the position of Heda. Tris will not be able to fight in the Conclave, but she will be a strong warrior. She serves me and our armies because she wants to, not because she was forced into it. She chose this profession. She could have just as easily been a farmer, like her brother, or a hunter, like her father. But, she wanted to be a warrior and defend her village."
"I never said anything about it being forced," Byrne quipped.
"You didn't have to, Major. I could see it your eyes. I know that most of your people see us as barbarians who have no true culture, but we do, in abundance. And, after Clarke is satisfied with the Mountain, your people will begin to see it in earnest. Until then, we will train and mingle amongst each other and hope to a quick and speedy defeat of the Mountain. I think you will be surprised at what your position will offer you when you get to come to Polis."
"We shall see," Byrne replied.
"Especially, since you will be the leader of one of my elite squads," Lexa told her as she rose up a little and became more of the Heda that Octavia knew. "But, that all remains to be seen depending on what you and your people decide after Clarke finalizes the proposals. Until then, I hope that you will continue to train with us, Major, and learn more about the what the Ground has to offer you. For now, though, I am done with class. Feel free to train your men how you see fit. I hope to speak with you later. Maybe, say, after dinner?"
"I'll see if my schedule allows it," Byrne told her. "But, yes, I would like to speak with you more about your rank structure and such. I will need to make sure that my Guard understand when they are addressing a foreign higher officer. I wouldn't want someone to make a political faux pas and start something because we weren't sure about the hierarchy."
"That is a good thought. I'll make sure to get with my Royal Guard to get the rank structures drawn up for your people. But, you are right. We both need to learn from each other. I would like to discuss your rank structures as well," Lexa replied, ever so much the diplomat, that Octavia had to cover her grin.
"I will get a Guard book for you to study, then, Lieutenant," Byrne answered.
"That sounds good," Lexa stated. "Now, if your excuse me, business needs attending to. The Guard is in good shape and working well. Keep up the good work, Major. It will be appreciated later, I'm sure. Until later."
"Until later," Byrne replied before vaulting over the fence and barking orders at the Guard only.
"Is she going to be a problem?" Lexa asked Octavia.
"No, she's usually on our side. She's just not sure what to do. She's not used to all this, but she's adapting. I think working more with you one on one will help her see what you do and what you want for the people. For now, all they have is the word of a few teenagers, what they perceive as a spoiled kid from Alpha who is controlling the new Council and a group of savages. Once, her mind is made up, you'll have the Guard."
"Why do you say that?"
"She was made Clarke's personal guard in many lives, and she always gave her life for Clarke's. She's a good person. She's just a little lost her. Give her the right direction and she'll give you her all. Telling her that she's the equivalent to a general in your armies helped. Now, she just needs to see that for herself."
"I see," Lexa replied as she started pondering who to pair Major Byrne up with for more political type training.
"Don't sent Anya to her. She'll beat her up and then... Try Luna or who was the girl from Podakru...Guara, I think. She'd been good to work with Major Byrne."
"We shall see, Oktevia. Why are you here? Has something happened?"
"Clarke," Octavia said quietly.
"Take me to her," Lexa commanded and off they went.
