Chapter 29
Moaning, Frisk buried her face further into the pillow. She didn't dare look at the clock. As long as she didn't know what time it was, it wasn't morning.
Chara was right to suggest Frisk spend the night in the Tem Village. Her back didn't hurt as much anymore, and she felt energetic for the first time in a long time. If this day could go better than the last, that would be great.
Begrudgingly, Frisk rolled out of bed. "Bed" was a generous term. It was more like a carpet with a fluffy pillow and a thick blanket. She had slept in the home of the Tem she carried back to the village. Temmie slept by Frisk's feet, completely comfortable with the arrangement she insisted upon.
Careful to not wake Temmie, Frisk washed her face and used her fingers to brush out her hair. When she was ready, she put the locket back on. She wished Chara a good morning as she tied her ribbon around her neck.
"Morning already?" Chara questioned. "I could have sworn it was just night."
"Next time I'll keep the locket on so you can have fun staying up all night by yourself."
"No, I think if you wore the locket to bed, I would scream in your ear every time you fell asleep. I would get too bored if you weren't awake to entertain me."
Frisk couldn't help but look at the smirking Chara. "Since when did you stop being such a grump? Better yet, since when did you have a personality and a sense of humor?"
Shrugging, Chara said, "I am not the diabolical demon most people think I am."
"How many times did you kill me, Chara?"
"I can't argue that. All right, let me rephrase myself: I am just enough a demon to justify everyone's beliefs that I fully am one, but I am really not. However, as it is much more fun being evil, I tend to act as a full-fledged demon."
After she was ready to go, Frisk looked around for Temmie. She was gone. Finding a sheet of paper, Frisk jotted down a note thanking the monster for keeping her for the night and wishing her well.
Frisk huffed as she picked up her pack and walked out the door. The village was at peace. It was early, so Frisk assumed the Tems were still sleeping.
As she made her way out of the village, Frisk sucked in a breath when she saw Sans lingering by the exit. However, she didn't stop moving. She kept walking and didn't stop until they were a foot apart. For a moment, neither spoke. It was Sans who broke the silence.
"You're really going to try to get to the surface, aren't ya?" he asked.
"I don't see what other choice I have," Frisk answered. "If I stay anywhere for too long, someone else will get hurt. I can't keep letting monsters get hurt or even die because of me."
"So, you will risk your life to try to save many?"
Frisk opened her mouth to respond, but Sans wasn't done. "Look, kid, I want to talk to you, but I would much rather we speak in private. Yeah, that's right, I haven't forgotten about our secret friend."
Not knowing what else to do, Frisk looked at Chara and said, "It will only be for a moment."
"I can't tell the difference between a moment and a millennium," Chara replied, crossing his arms and looking to the side. "Do what you need to do, but Stripes . . . Sans knows about the resets. He remembers every day that no longer happened. He . . . remembers killing you; he killed you to test if you were connected to the resets. Please, be careful."
"I will," Frisk promised, struck by the revelation. After she removed the locket but still held it in her hands, Frisk asked, "You know about the resets?"
Sans didn't deny it. "Chara told you, didn't he?"
"You killed me to test your theory. What if you were wrong, and I didn't come back?"
Unable to look her in the eyes, Sans answered, "I never, ever would have forgiven myself if that happened."
Frisk didn't know what to say, and it appeared neither did Sans. That conversation was over.
"What did you want to talk to me about?"
"A lot, actually." Sans began leading the way. "How about we talk over breakfast? There's a great place in Ice Capital we can get some burgers."
"I didn't know burgers were considered a breakfast item," Frisk said. "And isn't Ice Capital days from here?"
"Don't worry, I know a short cut."
They had only taken a few steps before she and Sans crossed the Temmie Village border and ended up stepping into a warm building with wooden walls decorated with darts and what appeared to be old movie posters featuring a remote with arms and stood upright on a single wheel.
The sight of other monsters caused Frisk's heart to jump, but the realization that they were not moving confused her. Brows pinched, she rationalized, "Teleportation to get here, and time magic to allow us to be here without anyone noticing."
"You betcha."
"But how are we going to eat if we can't order?"
In response, Sans took a plate filled with burgers and fries off a table and settled himself onto an empty seat at the bar.
"Isn't that stealing?" Frisk asked, settling herself on the barstool next to Sans's.
"I'll leave money on the table to buy a replacement," Sans answered. "Now, do you want something or not?"
Pointing at the plate Sans had, Frisk said, "I'll just take some of your fries, if that's all right."
"You don't want a burger?"
"I don't eat meat."
"What, are you vegan or something?"
"Not really. I just don't like meat. Besides," Frisk leaned in and whispered, "where does the meat come from? I have never seen animals Underground."
"Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to," Sans replied. He nudged his plate closer to her. "Help yourself to the fries. Want some ketchup?"
"Sure." When Frisk tried to pour the ketchup, the contents fell out of the bottle faster than she expected and drowned the food. She moaned. "Come on."
Sans laughed. "Would you like some fries to go with your ketchup?"
"Never mind, I'm not hungry."
While Sans ate and Frisk occasionally munched on a fry overloaded with sugary tomato, Frisk looked around the room. There were a lot of furry monsters. A couple of dogs played cards in the corner. A plant monster talked with a fish monster. If they weren't all wearing red, Frisk would have believed this would be a nice place to visit without stopping time.
"What do you know about a talking flower?" Sans asked out of nowhere, snapping Frisk's attention back towards him and the conversation that was supposed to happen.
"I know they're not real friendly," Frisk answered as cautiously as possible, not sure where this subject was going.
"Yeah, people leave really nasty messages in echo flowers sometimes," Sans said, and Frisk wasn't sure if he was serious. "Papyrus tells me that he will see one every now and again. It whispers to him: words of encouragement, words of praise, and words of prophecy. Funny, isn't it? I think somebody's trying to prank him. Whoever it is has some dedication. Definitely a sign to be careful out there."
Frisk didn't respond.
"Anyway," Sans continued, his half-eaten burger nearly forgotten, "I can't talk you into giving up your trip to the barrier, can I? Even if all of us worked together to bring you back to The Island, tied you up, and only let you out while on the same restriction Undyne had while there, you would still find some way to run off, wouldn't you? No matter what, you won't give up until the only thing standing between you and the barrier is King Asgore himself?"
"I admit I don't have everything figured out," Frisk said, holding a fry midair. "Yes, it would be safer for me to leave in the long run, but what about the rest of you? Monsters are still going to be trapped Underground."
"Don't forget monsters want to rage war on humanity."
"But why?"
Sans hesitated for a heartbeat. "Chara."
"Chara?" Suddenly that single fry between her finger and thumb was the heaviest thing in the world.
"He killed a lot of monsters, crown prince included. King Asgore didn't take it lightly."
Thinking back to the Chara from earlier that morning and the Chara from the day before, Frisk couldn't believe he would have done such a thing. However, when she thought about how Chara acted when they first met, his being a murderer in life made sense. He had killed her more than once. Each death of hers was enjoyable to him. As much as she wanted to believe otherwise, Frisk knew this suddenly friendly and funny Chara was just another one of his masks.
"Let's get back on course, shall we?" Sans then said. "I don't want to talk about Chara.
"What I want to talk about is you. So, you want to get back to the surface after spending half your life Underground. What about the Core?"
"I still want to visit the Core," Frisk insisted. "Something is wrong, and somebody has to fix it."
"And you think you're that somebody?"
"Absolutely not, but me as a somebody is better than a nobody, or so I tell myself. I could be wrong. Please, if I'm wrong, let me think I'm right."
Slouching in his chair, Sans threw his head back and said, "You're going to get yourself killed multiple times."
"I accept that fate."
"Well, I suppose I will have to go with you." When Frisk furrowed her brows, Sans explained, "I need to keep you from dying. Or at least as much as possible. These resets are causing disturbances in the space-time continuum. The more we minimize these resets, the better."
Frisk smiled, albeit a small one. "I suppose it's my turn to say that I can't talk you out of this, can I?"
"Nope." Sans placed his hands behind his head. "Nor can you talk the others out of this either. Like it or not, but we're with you to the end." He winked. "Think of us as that bad rash you got one morning that won't go away no matter what you do."
"Gross!" Frisk snorted.
"Now, hurry up and finish," Sans said, picking the burger back up. "I may have stopped time, but that doesn't mean it won't still be rude to keep the others waiting."
When they returned to Tem Village, Alice was waiting for them in the room Sans teleported Frisk and himself inside.
"You let her know what you were doing, didn't you?" Frisk asked Sans, somehow not surprised.
"She's got a hare to pick with you," Sans answered, winking. "After all your sneaky tricks, she's fed up with the hole thing."
"Now is not the time to make terrible puns, Sans."
"Geez, you're starting to sound like Papyrus." Sans shrugged. Then, without another word, he was gone.
Frisk turned her attention to Alice, who stared at the human with crossed arms and narrowed eyes. When Alice began speaking, she used the same venom she typically used with Sans. "So, that locket has your soul in it?"
"Alice, what are you—"
"Do you and Prince Chara Dreemurr share a soul?"
The air was sucked out of Frisk. For a good while, all she could do was stare open-mouthed at Alice. Whenever she tried to speak, all Frisk could do was open and close her mouth without making a single sound.
Even after she found her voice, Frisk still struggled. "You . . . er. You know about Chara?"
"Yes, but not much." Alice pressed her long ears even further into her skull. "Time and time again I have helped you. Sure, I did this of my own free will, and I will not blame you for decisions that were purely my own, but Frisk . . . How long have you been lying to me? How much of our friendship is a lie? Honestly, I'm starting to feel like you're taking advantage of me, and I hate feeling that way about you."
Suddenly feeling as if a thousand pounds was forced onto her shoulders, Frisk slumped against the wall and took a long, deep breath. "I'm sorry."
"You're sorry." Alice's voice rose a pitch. "You're sorry?!"
Now I know how Chara felt when I started yelling at him for apologizing. "What do you want me to say?"
"I want you to tell me the truth!" Alice exclaimed. "The whole truth and nothing but the truth. How do you have Prince Chara's lost soul? What do you plan to do with it?"
Holding onto the locket tighter, Frisk said, "My mom had Chara's soul the whole time. She took it so King Asgore would not have it. She had it infused with Chara's childhood locket, and she gave the locket to me before she died."
"Frisk," Alice tilted her head to the side, her eyes still narrowed but her expression softening slightly, "who was your mom?"
A steady exhale. "Her name was Toriel."
"Do you mean the exiled queen, that Toriel?"
"Ye-yes." Frisk couldn't look at Alice anymore. "I didn't know who she was. I didn't even know about Chara until the day she died. Mom never talked about her past. According to Chara, she wanted to forget it altogether."
"Wait, 'according to Chara'? You can talk to Prince Chara?"
Nodding, Frisk explained, "The way the magic in this locket works allows Chara to communicate with whoever wears his locket."
Alice's demeanor continued to relax. "You can talk to the long-lost prince whenever you wear that locket?"
"Yes. He can talk to me, and he can see and hear the world around us, too. Chara can't interact with anyone or anything other than me, however. It's the biggest curse of his situation."
"Oh, my!" Frisk looked up to see Alice covering her mouth, both ears standing upright. Leaning forward, her ears tilting back just a little, Alice said, "We can ask Prince Chara the truth."
Frisk pinched her brows together. "What do you mean?"
"King Asgore executed Prince Chara for the murder of Prince Asriel as well as dozens of other monsters before the crown prince."
"Well, I already knew that much," Frisk admitted, fingers curling tighter around the locket.
"Who told you?"
"Sans."
"Of course he would say that. Sans is a Red." Alice rolled her eyes.
"Then what do the Blues say?"
"That Prince Chara didn't kill anyone. He was wrongly blamed for things he never did. What does Prince Chara say about it?"
"He . . . doesn't really talk about it. All he says is he deserved to die for what he had done." Frisk felt a sudden wave of shame crash over her, as if she shouldn't be talking about Chara behind his back like this.
"That's it?"
He also admitted to killing his brother, but that's not really mine to share.
"It doesn't matter," Frisk insisted. "Chara's my guide out of the Underground. I don't care what he did when he was alive. Nobody should interrogate him now, a century later."
"But this could change everything!"
"Or nothing at all. Most monsters have already decided what to believe. If they insist Chara is guilty, then even having a conversation with him themselves will never convince them otherwise."
"What about you?" Alice asked. "What do you think about Prince Chara?"
Frisk didn't have to think long before she answered, "I think Chara made a lot of mistakes in life. Maybe he killed people, or maybe he made choices that resulted in people getting killed. Perhaps both. He refuses to talk about it, and I'm not going to pressure him to satisfy everyone's curiosity."
For a moment, Alice said nothing. Then, "I . . . I understand. If it were me in that situation, I wouldn't want to be harassed over things I died over. As upset as I am, you are right to keep Prince Chara a secret."
"Who all knows?"
"I told Mon," Alice confessed. "It's a long story why I told her, but I promise it was for a good reason. Besides, Mon can keep a secret better than anyone else in all Underground."
"It's okay. I trust Mon."
"However," Alice's ears drooped again, "I still would like for you to communicate with me. With all of us. We're your friends, Frisk. I know you're just trying to protect us, but running head first into danger is not the way to do it."
Hugging herself, Frisk mentally debated what to say from here. If there was any time to tell Alice about the resets, it was now. Yet Frisk could not bring herself to reveal such outlandish information. Alice might believe Frisk, or maybe Alice would think Frisk was messing with her. Nonetheless, Alice proved that she couldn't remember the resets, so her knowing about them wouldn't make much of a difference.
"I'm not entirely certain what I want to do," Frisk finally said. "I know the story is I'm trying to go back to the surface, but I'm not sure I even want to leave despite how dangerous it is for me here."
Alice tilted her head to the side. "Then why go to the barrier? It would take seven human souls to break it. Even if you and Chara could combine your soul strength, it wouldn't be enough. Not unless you stole the six King Asgore already has, but nobody knows where he keeps those."
"Look, I'm making it up as I go, okay?" Frisk rested her head on the back of the wall. "I'm serious about the Core, though. I would feel a lot better if we checked out what was going on there."
"Yeah, it has been warming up." Alice waved herself. Up until the day before, Frisk had only ever seen Alice in sweaters. It was odd seeing her rabbit monster friend in a T-shirt and knee length shorts.
"Alice," Frisk began, taking a shaky breath, "are you mad at me?"
"Not anymore," Alice replied. "Just no more sneaking off, okay? It's really annoying."
Frisk smiled. "All right, no more sneaking off."
"And you will be more honest with us?"
Since "be more honest" was not the same as "be completely honest," Frisk didn't feel wrong to say, "I promise."
"Is everything all right?" Chara asked immediately after Frisk put on the locket the world around him became visible again and he saw they were alone.
"Sans and the others are coming with us," Frisk answered, hand still gripping the locket. "According to Sans, my deaths and the resets that follow are causing some kind of issues in the space time contin- content- continuity?"
"Space time continuum."
"Yes, that." Frisk shook her head and dropped her arm. "I don't know if this is serious or just some mumbo jumbo to get me to agree with him, but I don't see any reasons to argue at this point. I don't like dying, and everyone else is just as stubborn about going with me as I am about going in the first place."
"Sounds as if they are a rash."
"Funny, Sans said the same thing."
"Are you serious? Am I truly no better than that comedian?"
"Haven't you heard your jokes?"
"That's different. I actually am funny."
Frisk sighed. "Alice knows about you, and so does Mon."
Chara's smile fell. He didn't like that the list of monsters who knew about him was growing.
"Alice did mention getting the truth from you," Frisk said, as if she didn't want to tell Chara but also didn't want to keep this to herself. Chara wished Frisk kept it to herself. "I told her I was not going to let anyone interrogate you, but Chara . . . what is the truth?"
"The truth is something I want to forget." Chara had to keep from crossing his arms and folding in on himself. It was more difficult to continue looking at Frisk.
"Did . . ." Frisk swallowed. "Did you kill anyone?"
For a minute, Chara didn't respond. The memories came on too strongly. He hated that in this form, no matter how hard he dug his nails into his palms, he couldn't feel pain.
Eventually, try as he might to keep it in, the truth fell out. "Yes. I will never forget my first murder, and I will never forget my last. Everything else in the middle? It all mixes together."
Frisk shook her head. "Did you really kill these people, or are you just blaming yourse—"
"Don't even finish that thought," Chara interrupted. "I suppose I should be somewhat glad that you are trying to see the best in me and give me the benefit of the doubt. However, it's truly a burden to realize I am not the person you think I am."
Slowly, Frisk asked, "What kind of person are you, then?"
When one of his most haunting memories came to him, Chara pressed his fists into his sides and clenched his jaw. He approached Frisk as he answered, "There was this girl. A cute, dainty little thing. She . . . she was my friend. I didn't have a lot of those. Other than my brother Asriel, there wasn't really anyone else.
"We were living through a dangerous time. Chaos was all around us. Do you want to know how she died?" Chara questioned as he stood in front of the silent Frisk.
Even though he couldn't touch Frisk – perhaps that was why he did what he did – Chara acted out as he said, "I placed my hand on the small of her back, pushed her close to me, and brushed my fingers down her cheek. As I looked into her eyes, I promised everything would be all right. I told her everything she wanted to hear amidst all the confusion and madness."
As he said the words, Frisk looked up at him. Her large brown eyes were wide, taking him and his closeness in. While Chara's hand hovered above the small of her back and the other motioned stroking her hair, Frisk's cheeks darkened a shade.
It surprised Chara right then how badly he wanted to touch Frisk's skin and feel her hair. In life, he flinched away from potential contact from those he didn't trust. In death, the lack of touch never bothered him. Until now, when the messages human warmth delivered – compassion, acceptance, the unspoken "I see you" – overwhelmed him with the need to belong. Before Chara stood the only person who could begin to understand what it was like to be him, and even with her standing so close, she was still so far away.
Knowing he had to finish the story he started, Chara raised his voice as he concluded, "Then, when her guard was down, I plunged my knife into her back, right where her heart was."
Frisk flinched as Chara motioned stabbing her. It was unsure to Chara if he or Frisk was the one who stepped back. Perhaps both wanted to get as far away from the other as quickly as possible.
"Why did you kill her?" Frisk asked, her words brittle. The sound of her voice hurt Chara more than if she started yelling "Murderer!" at him.
Answering her question with one of his own, Chara replied, "Why do we kill anyone? Killing should never have been an option, but by then, I was too far gone to care. I could never change, so why bother pretending I could?"
You don't deserve compassion. You don't deserve acceptance. If she ever saw who you truly are, she would never want to look at you again. A demon like you doesn't belong anywhere. This is the fate you deserve.
Lower lip wobbling, Frisk forced the words out, "So, the Reds are right?"
Chara didn't want to admit it, not as Frisk unknowingly confirmed every dark thought running through his head. "They are."
When Frisk hugged herself just then, she appeared small and fragile. After she survived deathlust, Chara thought of her as the strongest person he had ever met despite how she had lost a substantial amount of weight and became as pale as a ghost. Now, as she folded in on herself at his confirming words of who he truly was, all that strength was gone.
"Did Mom know?" Even her words sounded as if they would snap at the slightest application of pressure.
"I told her everything, after I became what I am. She only believed what she wanted to believe."
For the longest time, Frisk didn't say anything. She wouldn't even look at Chara. Her small steps backwards told Chara everything he needed to know.
"We don't need to be friends," Chara said, the words excruciating. He wasn't supposed to feel pain in his state, so he couldn't understand why he suddenly hurt all over.
"No," Frisk agreed, "we don't."
Chara knew what she was doing before she did. Instead of stopping her, Chara let it happen. He watched as Frisk removed the locket and the world around him as well as his very being vanished.
After Alice had left her to speak with Chara privately, Frisk had no intentions of asking Chara about his past. However, her own curiosity overwhelmed her. She wished it hadn't.
When Chara stood close to Frisk, closer than they had ever been before as he mimed holding her close, Frisk was filled with . . . something. What it was specifically, she wasn't sure. All Frisk knew was she stood stunned in place, transfixed at how human Chara was. Not his species, but the emotions he displayed. The regret in his words.
Then Chara yelled as he mimed stabbing her in the back. Frisk saw it then in his eyes, the hatred and anger he wore nearly everywhere. This was no story told to mess with her; Chara really did kill this girl the way he said he did.
Frisk couldn't make out what game Chara was trying to play. Perhaps he was opening up to make her want to be more vulnerable with him. It had worked once already, so there was no reason he wouldn't try going further.
But why say we don't have to be friends? Frisk assumed reverse psychology was at play here. She hugged herself, trying to make sense of her thoughts and feelings. No luck. Chara confused her, sending her spiraling down a tangled web of anger, fear, and compassion she could not understand. Does he hate me? Does he care about me? Why can't I figure it out? I should know, shouldn't I?
Not even stopping to think any further, Frisk rushed out of the room and searched for Sans. She found him lingering down the hall, back resting against the wall. When he saw her, he tilted his head.
"Take the locket," Frisk ordered, thrusting it out.
"You're going to trust me with the soul of the dead prince?" She had never heard Sans sound so disbelieving.
"I'm going to trust you to keep the locket away from me," Frisk corrected. "I don't know what, but Chara's playing some sort of game. I thought I could play along. I can't. What I need is for Chara to be kept away from me, but I can't trust myself to not put the stupid locket on in the first place."
When Sans didn't reach out to take the locket, Frisk pushed it even closer to him. "Take it, please! I don't know who else to give it to."
"Okay, okay. Calm down, kid." Sans accepted the locket. "What do you want me to do with it?"
"Just keep it away from me." Without wasting a second, Frisk spun on her heel and stalked away.
"What did he say?" Sans asked, just loud enough for Frisk to catch it.
So much. Too much. After all the time we spent together, I don't know who he is.
Frisk didn't turn around as she answered, "He said that the Reds are right."
No response. Then, "We're going to leave in an hour, or whenever Papyrus finishes getting ready. Whichever comes first."
"I can't wait," Frisk said, only half meaning it.
