Chapter 34: Making A Move

Once all the kages had gathered in Konoha, an urgent meeting was held. This meant that the presence of Kurotsuchi, Shee, the sand siblings, and Shikamaru was requested as they were still bodyguards to their respective kages. The whole matter was about the shinobi organisation that somehow succeeded in gathering information and following the group.

Shikamaru repeated everything his group knew. He shared his own assessment and the conclusions of the discussions they already had within the team.

"I thought about it, as I'm sure you all did," Oonoki said. "I'd hit them directly at their base."

"We have no idea where it is. Technically, they could've lied about the island," Kakashi disagreed.

Ay shook his head. "The facts haven't been checked yet. Before we take any action, we have to gather more intelligence on them."

"We all have tasked our intelligence departments to do what they can without really meddling with the organisation itself, right?" Gaara asked.

Mei smiled. "Of course."

"When we get what we need, we can meet again and decide on a course of action," Kakashi suggested with a shrug.

The smile never really left the mizukage's face. "I can already offer an idea."

"Let's hear?"

"We can send people on an undercover mission and secure them well, of course. When we see what exactly they plan to do, then we could take them down."

"That sounds like a good option for a start," Oonoki admitted.

Gaara placed his hands on the table. "Ok, let's give our intelligence two months to gather whatever they can. We can prolong the period if we must. Then we meet up again and pick shinobi for the undercover mission. Does everyone agree?"

A common affirmation put an end to the meeting. All of the bodyguards that took part in the ritual mission were released to join their teammates.

The other part of the group was led into the hokage complex. Shizune secured them a few rooms to use as dressing rooms.

The door of the girls' dressing room cracked open.

"Hello, gorgeous ladies!" a playful voice teased.

Ruka almost jumped out of her chair. "Ayame!" she exclaimed, already standing on her bare feet. She rushed towards her friend and gripped her into a desperate hug. Ayame being here was like she could see her lighthouse — even if she swam in the stormy sea, the harbour was near. There, she was going to be safe. Lady Mei was also going to be there, and her Mizukage wouldn't let her down.

"Oh, my," Ayame chuckled,pushing her friend to be at arm's length. "I knew you were a gem, but honestly, I have never thought you could be so... shiny, Ruka. Like a new coin."

"Oh, stop… I already feel out of my place. I'm not used to seeing myself like… this. It's so beyond my comfort zone."

Ayame nodded. "Then just pretend. Pretend you are dressed in something comfortable and ignore all of the looks that you are going to gather."

"You realise that you are making this worse?" Ruka half-hissed, half-whined.

"I'll be there," her friend squeezed her shoulder. "Chojuro will also be there, and he has grown very fond of you. And Lady Mei will be keeping an eye on you. Flower, you will be fine. Just…" — Ayame placed her other hand on Ruka's shoulder.— "try to relax and just have fun. Dance, chat… And whenever you feel discomfort, just come to me or Ameno." She tilted her head towards the other woman. "Chin up."

Ruka sighed in resignation, stalling to pull away. She had yet to put her shoes on, so she rushed to do so before following the other women into the hallway.. On her way to the door, she let Ayame hook her hand over her forearm. With small steps, they walked the path to the main hall where more people were pouring in.

They found their assigned table. This time there was a separation by village affiliation, though all the tables were close to one another. The food was all set where anyone could help themselves from the arrangement laid out on a big table standing beside one of the walls. And to get to it, people had to pass through the spacious empty space left for a dancefloor. Ruka shivered at the thought of marching through it in her tiny dress while carrying a plate; her hands trembled with only the image of it. She was stable on her high heels, but if the trembling spread down, she may end up spraining her ankle.

Her dark mood was scattered right away when her eyes met the charming smile of Mei.

Chojuro nodded and hurried to take Ayame away, leading her in the food's direction.

"My girl," the mizukage greeted casually and even reached to gently touch her shoulder. "You look good."

"You look wonderful, Mei-sama." The adoration gleamed in Ruka's eyes.

Mei chuckled. "Thank you. Now. Tell me how this mission is going for you."

"It has been… a very interesting experience," she admitted quietly.

"I hope so." A knowing smile curled on her red lips. "I like the change I see in you."

Ruka's cheeks flushed in an instant. "Thank you, Mizukage-sama."

"You seem more… bright?" Mei sipped on her tall glass; her smile never faltered. "Is there a particular reason for that?"

"I… don't think I understand the implication." Ruka frowned.

Mei hummed, obviously amused. "Happy. Let's go with happy."

"I'm very glad I can go home and return to my medical training."

"Oh, is that so?"

"Yes?" She felt a tickle in the back of her mind. Had her mizukage expected a different reply?

"I'm not getting a new shinobi to fill Kiri's lines?" Mei chuckled as Ruka frantically shook her head. "Not gonna lose you to another village just yet?"

"Lady Mei!" she exclaimed indignantly.

"I put you on this mission, fully realising that I might lose you, Ruka," she teasingly whispered, leaning closer to her. "I did it anyway. You've proven yourself to me over and over again, and I wouldn't mind you going down the road that I couldn't get on… because of one reason or another. If a family is what you want, I'll do my best to defend your back from the old geezers. You know that." She patted the younger woman's cheek with a fond expression.

"I'm staying in Kiri," Ruka breathed out.

The mizukage smiled. "Alright. Do me a favour?"

"Always."

"Have a little fun today, eh? Dance. Drink a little. Though you must stop at the first signs of getting tipsy."

"Yeah… I kind of figured that out on my own," Ruka admitted, her cheeks reddening.

Mei snapped her head at her. "Have you tried drinking?"

"A little. I know the phases of alcohol intoxication, and to be honest, I feel terrible if I drop out of the 'excitement' one and enter the 'confusion' one." Ruka wore a guilty expression all the while she confessed her new experience.

"Alright… Then you know when to stop."

"About half a glass of wine."

"There you go," Mei said, nodding towards the alcohol bar. "Go and get your glass. Soon the official part will start."

The kunoichi timidly turned to follow her mizukage's instructions.

"Ruka?" The older woman called after her.

She peered over her shoulder. "Yes?"

"What would you think of participating in more joint missions with shinobi from other villages?" Mei's voice was caressing her ears like silk; her expression was cautious and assessing. "With any of the shinobi you were on this mission?"

"I… They are alright. I think I could work with all of them," she said simply.

"Good." A wide smile bloomed on the mizukage's face.

Ruka felt lightheaded. As if in a dream, she headed towards the alcohol bar, fully forgetting her concerns. Lady Mei never asked questions without having something else in mind.


Shee gripped his glass but didn't lift it to his lips. Ay didn't approve of his men being drunk, or even tipsy, so he was going to save face and stay away from alcohol. His teammates leaned on the non-alcoholic beverages as well.

He was present at the kage meeting and arrived earlier than his teammates at the event. The noise was still bearable, and his brain had the time and opportunity to keep him occupied. Shee wished it hadn't. But the scattered memories of a disturbing dream rushed through his head. The wide eyes, the muttered apology, the shock on the tender face — all of it chased him, making him feel weak and guilty.

Shee felt claustrophobic when the hall started to fill more. To get some sense of control, he let his eyes close, getting rid of the visual stimulus — a cascade of colours, glamour, and a lot of gleam that painfully drilled into his brain. When Ay's voice boomed to his left, he reluctantly squinted against the lamps. They weren't very bright, but still annoying. He observed the big room, noting that his teammates had arrived while he was resting his sight.

All of the men, including himself, looked similar. Temari and Kurotsuchi weren't a surprise either. His other kunoichi teammates were stunning too, he had to admit.

He observed the females somehow absent-mindedly... It wasn't until a particular one in a dark red dress crossed the hall that Shee's eyes actually focused. Ruka, whom he had observed for over a month, was only a faint shadow of that woman walking over there. She stood tall, walking graciously on high heels nonetheless. Her chin was level with the floor and not shyly hanging low. With a serious and thoughtful face, she moved confidently, not noticing him. It was obvious her mind was elsewhere.

Shee's gaze lingered on her bare back; it passed over the beautiful curve of her neck and the few protruding vertebrae of her spine. Still, when she walked, her muscles moved under her skin, hinting at her agility. Terrified, he realised that heat started to creep through his body. It was urging him to reach and touch, to smell and savour every emotion and sensation she could bring him.

It was exciting and petrifying… And mostly impossible.

The muscles of his jaw clenched. He crossed his arms and pressed them tightly to his chest.

As if she finally sensed his intense gaze, Ruka cast a glance his way. Their eyes met, just briefly, but her face was set aflame, and she quickly averted it. Shee succeeded in turning his sight to the side and keeping it there.


Shikamaru could hardly tear away his gaze from the curved figure in the green dress. She moved like a cat, and just like one, she could be approached only if she wanted to be approached. It was her call... It had always been, actually. She cast him glances, warning him to stay away and daring him to come closer at the same time. Wave after wave of excitement shook his body, keeping him on his toes. Temari was exactly what moved him, who made his soul tremble in anticipation.

A simple piece of jewellery decorated Tenten's neck. The pale moonstone lying between her collarbones gathered the rays of light from the lamps into its core. Her face was passive; her lips were pressed into a firm line.

She thought she would feel better once in Konoha, but she didn't. An additional weight lay on her shoulders after the talk with Hinata. It didn't feel good to confirm Neji's love. If she had been aware of the situation, she could have helped him make a decision. In that case, she might have considered running. At first a strong inner protest rose in her brain, but after she gave it a thought... It changed. No matter what, it was already too late…

Kankuro's words stung even harder because his insults were so wrong… and unfair. Her whole body shivered.

Ameno, Ayame, and Ruka stood close to the food table and chatted. More accurately, Ayame and Ameno chatted while Ruka chuckled and tagged on with a word here and there.

Raikage Ay gathered his entourage around himself, giving them some kind of instructions. By Karui's face, one could guess that what she heard didn't leave her brimming with enthusiasm. Chouji soon came to her rescue by asking her for a dance. Her face lit up, and a wide grin pulled at her lips.

Ay wouldn't hold her back if a member from another village asked for her company. The man had his quirks, but his soul was a very romantic one when there was no fight at hand or anything more violent pressing.

"So Karui is the only one that stepped up and got a… kind of a… boyfriend?" Ay asked through a low, rumbling laugh.

"Amai also got a nice piece for himself," Atsui chuckled.

The man in question gave him an almost resentful look, but he didn't deny.

"Is that so?" The raikage raised an eyebrow. "Then why are you sitting here listening to my ramblings? You are dismissed." The man leaned forward, loudly whispering, "Go."

Amai winced but got on his feet. The opportunity to spend more minutes with Ameno was something he longed for. And once presented, he was going to take full advantage. He bowed to his teammates and kage. "Thank you."


Ino looked around. She had been patiently waiting for a certain opportunity, and it presented itself on a silver plate. She couldn't do anything else but seize it. With purposeful steps, she headed towards the garden doors, brushing beside Sai. He held her gaze in passing and nodded at her silent request. Following her outside, he caught up with her in seconds.

"Is there anything wrong?" he asked in whispers, leaning closer.

Ino shook her head; then she peered playfully at him before she lifted her chin up and stared up. "Look at the sky," she said.

Sai frowned but complied — his pale face turned upwards. "The stars are really bright tonight," he admitted.

"They are. On nights like this one, I feel... I compare myself with the infinity of the sky, and I feel so small. So… insignificant and—"

"But you're not," Sai snapped uncharacteristically sharply; their eyes met with spine-chilling intensity. "You can't possibly feel insignificant, because... you have the most significance in my life." He took her hand, his eyes downcast. "You made me feel. And you had the patience to wait for me to cope with my own feelings and the heart to accept them." Sai squeezed her hand, leaning closer. "You accepted me, the broken and socially awkward me... I don't think I'll ever be able to express what that means to me."

Ino realised she was crying only when the tears tickled down her cheeks. She tried to speak but failed miserably. The only sound she could produce was a strangled sob, and she desperately tried to hide it with a hand pressed to her lips. She failed.

Sai's expression twisted into a terrified grimace. "Is what I'm saying making you sad?" he asked. Panic was rising in his voice.

Ino gripped his shirt, shaking her head all the while. Her knuckles turned white at the force she put in clinging to him. "No," she choked out.

He stood there, not daring to touch her or to move. Even breathing felt wrong at this moment, though he had to keep taking air in and out. Diligently waiting for her to regain her vocal control and speak, Sai swallowed. His heart dropped in his stomach when he saw her tears continue rolling down her face. Small shivers shook his body. Had he said something wrong and finally worn her patience thin?

In a few minutes that felt like hours to him, Ino managed to speak. "I'm not sad. No. I'm very, very happy... Those are happy tears, Sai."

The tension numbing his body evaporated in a blink of an eye. With one breath while staring at her smiling face, he let it all go out. Sai found himself talking and reflexively looking to the side. "I told you that I was in love with you," he whispered. "But now... I think that I'm not in love with you, but that I love you." He paused, caught in one of his anxiety moments; his teeth sank into his lower lip.

Ino reached up to touch his mouth and reminded him gently that there was no need to hurt himself. He stopped immediately, releasing his lips. His black eyes returned to gaze into the endless blue pools that were capable of sucking him in and bringing him calm.

"Does that make any sense?" he asked quietly.

Ino let out a shaky sigh. "I love you too," she replied as a warm expression took over her gentle features. Her fingers lingered on his pale cheek. With her other hand, she tugged at his shirt in a silent demand that he give her a kiss. He compiled without any resistance — his soft lips pressing on her bright red ones. They had been tempting him since he laid his eyes on her tonight. Truth be told, Sai still couldn't comprehend that Ino had agreed to spend her life with him. No matter how many days either of them had left, they were going to spend them together. And he knew that he was going to treasure every second of that remaining time.

He relished in the specific floral scent, relaxing more; he came to his senses. It was not the first time he kissed her or held her… But maybe for the first time, he was honest in front of himself that it was not enough. He wanted more… He wanted it all.


"Hey there."

The three women lifted their heads.

"We've never been properly introduced," the man continued with a cheeky smile. "I'm Kiba."

"Hello, Kiba," Ayame replied right away; her lips pulled into a grin. "Nice to meet you! This is Ameno from Sunagakure. I'm Ayame, and this is Ruka. We are both from Kirigakure."

"I'm a local," he confided. "I was wondering... Would any of you accompany me to the main table for a drink?"

Ayame laughed. "Oh, I've had enough drinks for the evening."

"I'm good, thanks." Ameno playfully raised her half-full glass, turning down his offer with ease.

He directed his attention solely to Ruka. "Well, you're gonna reject me, too?"

She would have refused if her heart wasn't so kind, but it was too big for her chest. "I'd love to accompany you," she said. She smiled at him and gave him her hand so he could help her up. He then led her to the corner with the drinks.

"She didn't look exactly willing to go with him," Ameno noted quietly.

"Nope," Ayame confirmed and sipped on her drink.

"Then why did she agree?"

The woman snorted. "Because she took pity on him, that's why. She couldn't say no because she didn't want to hurt his ego." Ayame waved the matter off. "She's perfectly capable of getting rid of him. Don't worry about her. She can be tough when she really has to."

"Okay…" Ameno peered at the anxious-looking Ruka. "I will trust you on that."

"Looking fragile has its pros." There was a mischievous glint in Ayame's eyes. "If there is a man that feels responsible or protective of her, he will go to her aid. So… She may even not have to say no."

Ameno chuckled. "You just described the whole male part of our team."

"See. There will be someone to sneak her out if needed."

"You don't mind Chojuro doing that?"

"Why would I mind? Would you mind if Amai helped her?" Ayame asked thoughtfully.

"Of course not."

"There you go. It's all fine." She grinned. "Ruka is not a stealer. She would die before looking at a man who's taken. It's deeply rooted in her soul."

"So you're from Kiri?" Kiba asked, stepping a tad closer to her.

His presence hit her like an overstuffed pillow, too overwhelming for her comfort. She slid smoothly to the side with a half-step.

"Yes. I was born and raised there," she answered with a shy smile.

"And you came with the mizukage's group?"

"I did."

Despite the music playing in the hall, an awkward silence filled the space between them.

"Are you a kunoichi?" Kiba attempted another conversation. It was a stupid question, and he knew it, but it was... something.

Ruka smiled. "I would hardly be in Lady Mai's official cohort if I wasn't a kunoichi, Kiba-san."

He stared at her face, not able to hide his awkward grin. "You're right… Sorry… I just…" He chuckled, rubbing the back of his head. "What I really wanted to say was that you have a wonderful smile, Ruka-chan."

Her face flushed, and she laughed nervously. "Thank you."

They stopped at the end of the food table, where the alcohol was. Ruka accepted the glass he offered and waited for him to get one of his own. She kept a polite smile on her face, speaking only when he asked something. But her discomfort grew exponentially at every clumsy attempt to give her a compliment as if it started to pour out from her every pore. She was already regretting going along with his request for she felt almost naked under his gaze. The sensation wasn't unfamiliar to her, but she had never been in her own, unshifted, unchanged body before.

Ruka actually gazed back at Ayame, but her friend looked too into her current conversation to come to her aid.

Shee watched Ruka from the corner of his eye. He could sense her uneasiness like a faint electricity jiving at his nerve receptors. But weirdly enough, that man was absolutely unperceptive to it. Or he deliberately refused to take it into consideration. In Shee's eyes, the latter was far worse. He had trust in Ruka's abilities to defend herself, but for a month, he had realised that she's too soft, too polite, to let herself be rude without utter necessity.

His chest grew heavy with the passing of every minute. Ruka's hands remained still; her posture didn't change, but there was something about her irradiance... It kind of dulled down as if she were a torch suffocated by a jar, as if her whole body vibrated with wariness and his core could pick up on that. To him, it sounded like a subconscious call for help. And truth be told, Shee couldn't watch her struggle like that... and just sit to the side. Especially when he could easily do something about it.

Once he made up his mind, he placed his glass on the table and slowly stood up. He stuck his hands in his pockets. He moved slowly, adding some aimlessness while still advancing his goal. While Shee approached, he noticed she was on the brim of her patience — her shoulders had started to tense slightly, and the hand with her glass had glued to her body. Her face was still carrying the polite mask, but it had started to crack. Shee's head just couldn't comprehend how a trained shinobi, even if tipsy, wouldn't sense the signs so close to his face. The annoyance burnt under his skin.

Ruka saw Shee moving her way amongst the dancers. Their gazes locked for a fraction of a second, but it had been enough. A purposeful look and a curt shake of his head were everything she needed to understand that he was coming to help her. His movements were deft, his eyes full of determination — that caused Ruka's whole body to still. Goosebumps broke out all over her skin. Her heart raced wildly the nearer he got.

He passed behind Kiba and turned, hitting the man's back with his shoulder and pushing him forward. The angle of Shee's shove was carefully calculated in such a way that Kiba wouldn't land on Ruka. The leaf shinobi was tipsy enough that his glass slipped through his loose fingers and dropped on the floor, shattering into a million pieces. Some of them landed on the bridge of Ruka's bare feet.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," Shee said immediately, pulling his best apologetic face.

Kiba had begun to prick up but relaxed in an instant with the expression of regret. "No worries. I'll get a new glass."

"I'll get someone to clean this up," Shee added.

"Thanks, mate," Kiba patted the other man's shoulder.

The gesture made Ruka freeze. Seeing how Shee's jaw clenched, she kind of expected him to snap; although he tensed, his hands remained in his pockets. He quickly overcame his initial reaction.

Already appearing calm, he turned to her: "Ruka, please return to your table. Your feet are bare; you may hurt yourself."

A subtle smile tugged on her lips, just so briefly. She shook out the little pieces of glass, careful where she stepped. "You are right, Shee-san. I'll move to the side." Then she turned to the confused-looking Kiba with a still-polite smile and a firm tone. "It was nice talking to you, Kiba-san. Thank you for your company." He attempted to say something; his expression suggested he wanted to hold her back, but she was faster. "I wish you a nice rest of the evening."

Kiba closed his mouth and just looked at her for a few seconds. "Well, I wish you a nice evening too," he said in the end, finally surrendering to the obvious hint. His next destination was the alcohol corner.

Ruka smiled at Shee in passing; her eyes sparkled, and he almost could spot the three little dots in her iris. "Thank you," she whispered.

His answer was nothing more than a curt nod; he kept his face blank. But his chest rose and fell with ease, knowing she was alright.


Kurotsuchi retreated to the outskirts of the hall, masterfully mingling with the crowd. She aimed to stay under the radar of both her grandfather and father, and so far she was successful at her enterprise. The great clock on the wall showed it was quarter to nine — her time here was slowly running out. Tomorrow she was going to leave, and the chance of seeing Youta again would become closer to null. She had to try... She wouldn't forgive herself if she didn't give it a fair shot.

And the exit was so close...

Kurotsuchi grabbed a full glass on her way. Her heartbeat accelerated tenfold with the approaching freedom. Once she bolted out, no one would be able to stop or find her. The problem was that her older relatives insisted on keeping an eye on her. Since… Well, since that incident. Kurotsuchi was well aware that Ittan or Sagan, or both of them, were instructed to report her actions during the mission.

"Where do you think you are going?"

She stopped; her eyes closed briefly. "Good evening again, Grandfather," she chirped with a falsely joyful voice before even starting to turn.

"I could sniff your desire to get away from the other end of the hall." Oonoki crossed his arms and frowned.

She just kept smiling.

His eyes darted to her side just before an arm slung around her shoulders. "I promised her a walk in the garden," Kankuro interjected. "I asked her to wait for me outside."

"What is up with you two?" Suspicion dripped into Oonoki's tone.

"Nothing," Kurotsuchi dragged. "Nothing unusual."

"We are young, bored, and single. We're just… having fun… No strings attached, as to say." Kankuro grinned, pulling her closer to him.

Oonoki's face reddened, but Kankuro endured his devastated look without a flinch. Kurotsuchi gave him an eyebrow-raised side glance.

"Having fun, eh?" the old man sneered. "Well, I know where to find you if anything goes wrong," he threatened, grasping his hands in a hold behind his back.

The sand shinobi bowed. "Of course. Do I have your blessing to accompany her tonight?"

Oonoki scoffed. "Better you than someone… else."

"Would you stop and at least feign some respect for me, grandfather?" she snapped.

"I'm sorry. My trust for you has been narrowed down…" He sighed. "Anyway. Go. I want you at nine for breakfast at our inn. We leave at ten."

"I'll be there," she mumbled.

"Of course you will." Oonoki waved her off and slowly limped to where his son was seated.

Kurotsuchi slowly took in a breath before moving again. Her fists were clenched, her nails digging painfully into her palm. But she squared her shoulders and her lips shaped into a mischievous smirk.

Kankuro followed her and made sure to check her out from behind. He didn't have to pretend to like the sight — Kurotsuchi's butt looked quite nice in her dress and high heels.

Once in the garden, she spun to him. "I'm not having sex with you," she stated.

"You are not?" He raised an eyebrow. "I thought that's what you wanted since the beginning of this mission."

The man expected a witty and snarky remark. What he didn't expect was for her to crack.

She walked to a bench a few feet from them and slumped down on it. She hid her face in her hands. Kurotsuchi let out a sound — a mix of a sigh and sob.

Kankuro's body froze. He needed a few moments to process what was happening in front of his eyes. The couple of glasses he had downed weren't of any help. He sat beside her.

She lifted her face up and peered at him. He couldn't believe how her face looked. He had known her for a few years now, but never had he seen her so genuinely distraught.

Carefully, Kankuro laid a hand on her back. "You don't have to tell me anything. I'll cover you up. I'll disappear for the evening and claim we have been together the whole night."

Kurotsuchi shook her head. "You don't have to do that."

"I want to do it," he corrected her.

She bored glossy eyes in his face, alarming thoughts prancing through her head. "I can't believe you are so nice to me," she whispered, her words true.

"I'm nice by default," he teased and nudged her shoulder. "You've just never bothered to notice."

Kurotsuchi chuckled, wiping away her almost overflowing tears. "I think I want to tell you… Maybe I will feel better?" A slight shrug made her look smaller… and weaker.

"If you want to tell me, I'll listen."

She remained quiet for a few moments, dazed off, gazing at the great building towering above them. The music that came from the inside, the laughter, and the voices all started to blend in her head. Kurotsuchi didn't give her trust easily. Her demeanour was a carefully built-up facade, helping her survive. It was so well incorporated into her that it often suffocated her primal self. The tender one...

"I got badly hurt on a mission when I was twelve, and I ended up in a hospital." She rubbed her right shin as if remembering the pain. "My leg was set in a cast for a month. I was really bored and angry at the situation."

Kurotsuchi sighed; her eyes dropped down and hid behind her thick eyelids. Her fingers grabbed the hem of her dress, and she absentmindedly started to fiddle with the fabric.

"Youta was my rehabilitator's son. He was fifteen then." She sniffed, then chuckled. "He was a teen in his prime. Lean, skinny even, his hair was a mess, his face was covered with pimples, and he was an absolute ass. But I was too cocky to back down. I was a kunoichi, a granddaughter of the tsuchikage, possessing strength and abilities beyond his imagination."

"He's a civilian?" Kankuro asked, despite him knowing the answer.

"He is."

"I'm sorry… Please go on," he whispered, leaning slightly closer to her so she could talk even more quietly.

She smiled — a very soft smile that Kankuro hadn't seen on her. "I was discharged from the hospital soon after meeting him. But I got wounded again and ended up in the emergency. In the first week, I was in a wheelchair. He… witnessed an altercation between my dad and myself, where I sent an earth spike his way. I think that was the moment Youta became curious about me. Maybe he was afraid..."

"Oh, he surely was afraid, alright. But I guess his balls were big enough to come to you despite that."

"Yeah… We got to know each other. He was there during my rehabilitation sessions, and I think then he realised how important a job his mother has.

"Whenever I was in the hospital, he came to see me and talk to me. In the beginning he was very... wary. But with time, we both started to feel very comfortable with each other. Too comfortable, actually."

Kurotsuchi quieted down, squeezing the fabric of the dress. "When he turned eighteen, he pulled back and became very... polite. He went into medical school; he wanted to be a rehabilitator."

"It makes sense he would distance himself. You were underaged at that point."

She nodded in acceptance. "I realise that now... But then I was fifteen. My hormones were making me crazy."

Kankuro laughed. "I get what you mean — been there, done that." He patted her knee. "Continue, please."

"I was falling for him more and more... until I was head over heels for him." The kunoichi huffed. "He kept his distance, not letting me be more than a friend to him. I know now that what he did was right, but I was very frustrated then."

"I can imagine," Kankuro whispered, and she slapped his thigh. "Ouch!"

"But he was always very gentle, and the way he smiled would make my heart flutter." Kurotsuchi instinctively placed a hand on her chest. "He behaved with me like I was a normal, ordinary person: respectful but without fear of me. No one… no one behaved with me this way. It was on my seventeenth birthday when I finally pressed him in the corner and demanded he tell me how he felt about me. He admitted that he had been in love with me for at least three years.

"I insisted we start to date. I have always been pushy… That's a trait of my character I can't really help." Kankuro agreed with a nod, and she continued: "He couldn't say no to me. Of course I took advantage of his softness. I was wrong. I should have understood my political position better and not put either of us in such a mess." Kurotsuchi shrugged, reconciled with the past. "It wasn't enough to hold his hand and cuddle on the couch, as you can imagine. He put up a fight, sure, but I can be very persuasive when I want something. He was what I wanted."

"So you ended up having sex." Kankuro summarised for her.

"Well… Yeah. We had various activities before I finally pressed him down and rode both of us into oblivion."

"Spare me the details."

"I wasn't going to give you any details, anyway."

"Right."

One more time, she sealed her lips.

"I… got pregnant a year and a half later," she said so quietly that he thought the words were imaginary. "The council voted to get rid of the..." She took a shaky breath. "I didn't want to. I wanted to keep it. I wanted to quit and be with the man that was right by my side no matter what. An ordinary man who was the perfect match for my stormy soul." She bit her bottom lip. "Youta was ready to take care of the child, so I didn't have to quit at all."

"They didn't let you, right?"

She shook her head. "Of course not. That was the bitter moment it became clear to me that I didn't own anything I considered mine. Even if I had the child, I wouldn't have any rights to it. They were going to take it away from me... from us."

Kankuro snorted in agreement. He knew her pain well enough, even though he would always have Gaara behind his back. She had it worse.

"Then, I decided that if I can't have my kid with the person whom I love and who loves me back, then I will not have any at all. I pleaded my case in front of the council. They denied it, of course. In the end, I threatened them that I would get rid of the possibility of having children at all. On my own, not in a hospital."

He hummed. "I gather you were not bluffing."

"I was not. So… They agreed not to force me to have kids if I keep serving the village and the country." She paused to give him an unamused smile. "But we had to end our relationship. The council's old geezers threatened to evict Youta from the village if we didn't comply. He made a deal with them to stay away from me, but asked for permission to stay with me while I go through the nightmare in the hospital. And he was right there, holding my hand. He didn't say a word, but Kankuro... His eyes told me everything."

Kankuro's chest ached for her. He slowly nodded. "You broke up after that?"

"We did. He told me that he will wait for me until I become old and ugly, and no one cares who I am spending my time with. I told him not to... and I was genuine."

"He never dated anyone else, did he?"

"No. I receive information about him through my own channels. I feel guilty, though."

"It's his decision, Kurotsuchi. Don't keep yourself accountable for his decisions."

"I, on the other hand, started to go out with other men, hoping to forget about him. I started to have sex with other people. But I always compared them to him. I still do. The way the touch is perceived when you love the person is just... different."

Kankuro sensed her pricking up and immediately caught the sounds of steps. They exchanged gazes — she strode over his thighs and sat on his lap. Her arms wound around his neck; he gripped her ass and pulled her over his crotch. Kurotsuchi leaned forward, closer to his ear.

"Last year, I started to sneak up into his apartment and talk with him, letting him hug me. He doesn't dare to have sex with me because he hates himself for causing me pain. I think he loved that embryo more than I did."

"I wouldn't be surprised if he did. He sounds like a fine man, but he doesn't stand a chance with the Iwa council and your dad and granddad. He would have some chance if he at least was a shinobi."

"Not really. He has to be from a respected clan. You know how it is..."

She lifted her head up and pulled Kankuro's face to her breasts. He complied and touched her collarbones with lips.

From the corner of her eye, Kurotsuchi saw a few silhouettes moving towards the heart of the garden.

"I think it will become quite crowded here," she breathed out.

"We may as well get out of here," he offered. "We were seen, so we're good."

Being truthful to her mocking nature, she grinded on him, eliciting an annoyed hiss rather than a moan. He didn't have even a hint of erection she could tease for the fun of it. "You seem... unhappy to see me?" she sneered.

"Yeah, sorry about that. Don't have the right... motivation."

She patted his cheek. "I won't take it personally. My depressive story didn't help promote the right mood."

"Let's get out of here," the kunoichi muttered on his chest.

"Yes." He pushed her away carefully and started to button up his shirt.

She fixed her dress and offered him a hand. The more people saw them leave together, the better.

They got into the inn that Kankuro's bags had been moved to, where all representatives from Suna were being accommodated. They went upstairs, and when Kankuro closed the door, he leaned on it with a sigh.

"You are free to go," he said.

"Sure." She pushed one of her dress's straps off her shoulder.

Kankuro narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "What are you doing?"

Kurotsuchi gave him a pissed-off look. "Don't just stay there. Help me."

"How?"

"Give me a pair of clothes. Yours," she demanded.

He shrugged and compiled while she undressed. The kunoichi grabbed the clothes and pulled them on herself. They were way too big for her, making her look even smaller. She. actually had to roll up the sleeves a few times so her hands could show out of the fabric. Then she paused for a moment, hesitant.

Kurotsuchi took a deep breath and stood in front of Kankuro. "How do I look?"

"Kurotsuchi, if one quarter of what you told me about Youta is true, he wouldn't care how you look at all." He dismissed her with a small smile.

Her shoulders dropped down, and before he could react, she threw herself on him, grasping him in a tight hug. "Thank you," she whispered on his chest.

"Yeah, yeah... You pull out a lot of colourful feathers to hide yourself," Kankuro replied, patting her back. "Makes it difficult for people to see how nice you are."

"That's the point of hiding, smart-ass." She pecked his cheek. "See you in the morning. I'll make sure to come say bye."

"Go." He chuckled.

Kurotsuchi slank out of the window.