Merlin Pendragon, for as long as he lived, rather that be as long as the next hour or the next fifty or so years, found that there was only one question he would constantly have to go back to again and again…how did he ever find himself stuck in the messes he got in? How did he find himself the center of attention? The freak show? The one stirring up a fuss just because he 'wanted' to have said attention. And a far more important question…why was it so hard for Merlin to-how'd Arthur put it-ah, yes. Why was it so hard for him to be able to dig himself out of the hole threatening to cave in on top of him. If Uther Pendragon wasn't the one kicking the dirt to make sure it covered him fully, smothering him as it grew far too thick and heavy and dense for Merlin to crawl out of. Till the dirt got in his mouth, tasting of earth and worms and the consort could only guess at what else, until it filled his lungs as he wheezed in desperate for air. Until he finally gave in to the inevitable demise that was waiting for him.
But despite the questions, Merlin found he hadn't exactly been surprised to find where he ended up. With the prince dragging him straight to his father…Arthur probably would not want to get his hands dirty. And would prefer to have his father kill Merlin off now for his impudence. All of this, it had happened to many times for Merlin to be surprised. He'd get to Arthur. Tell the prince some fantastical story that couldn't possibly be true because of how outlandish it was. And then Arthur would laugh in his face, or try throwing him out…even throw him a round a few times if their privacy allowed for the horrible moments to happen. And then it would come back in full circle when Merlin was proven right. By this point, it was simply the worse pattern ever. And it made his mouth feel sticky in disgust. As if his tongue was trying to stick to the roof of his mouth because of the bitterness pooling inside of him.
Because Arthur's head was permanently stuck inside of his own arse. Willing to risk his own life just because his hatred for Merlin was stronger then his own self preservation. And this wasn't the ordinary things they'd been dealing with…the whole thing was a completely different brand of crazy. And that meant they needed something else to survive. This was a poison. A deadly toxin that would probably send fire right through the veins. Make you feel it as your organs started to shut down one by one. Your heart freezing inside your chest and no longer able to pump the blood one needed to keep a healthy body. Arthur couldn't just take his blade and wack at it until it stopped moving like he had done Valiant or to that monster in the water supply. And even if Arthur decided to…get a different drink and not risk the possibility of facing the poisoned cup, that didn't mean Arthur wouldn't still end up stealing Merlin's death.
If Bayard had tried once…
Whose to say he wouldn't agIn…
Whose to say it would be Merlin staring down at the paling face and bloodless corpse that had once been the body of Arthur Pendragon. When it should've been Merlin laid out across the ground to be exactly what he had been in life…nothing but a spectacle. And here Arthur was, so busy he was with his pig-headedness that he couldn't see he was about to swipe Merlin's rightful death out of his hands. If it was anybody that deserved to go out…Merlin would take the chance while he could.
No Royal Prince was going to be stubborn and end up being what Merlin had craved to be all these weeks…a corpse.
And no Prince was going to sweep in after weeks of silence and take it right out of his grasp. Just like he had taken his mother's letter.
And if Arthur's father was going to kill him, well…Merlin was tired of being quiet anyway. Tired of being rude and cocky to the extreme, trying to poke and prod at Arthur until they both reached a snapping point. Tired of doing something as horrific as…tripping in front of the entire kingdom on his way through the crowd just because his leg had seized up when he first saw Arthur standing there. Sending this flare up his leg in remembrance to the last time he had seen Arthur not that long ago. Arthur and his touching…his touching…all the constant touching that made Merlin wish he could crumble into dust just to escape…
"No!" Merlin didn't know who was more surprised…himself or Arthur, by the roar and anger that erupted from his own throat. Sounding as if it belonged to a grown man, instead of a teenage boy whose voice still cracked on the very odd occasion. And Merlin didn't know where the sudden burst of strength came from…perhaps it was the anger coursing this dark path throughout his body, something Merlin needed to learn to harness if it could get him the right bloody kind of attention-but he finally managed to wretch his arm out the prince's grip. Stepping back quickly in case Arthur tried to make another grab for him. But now that he had Arthur's full attention-being watched by nobles and servants alike-and he was going to speak as he pleased. "I am so sick and tired of you telling me what to do. Be quiet, Merlin. Nobody wants to hear what you have got to say Merlin. Go find a hobby Merlin. Stop trying to do your best to embarrass me, Merlin. Don't go out Merlin, or people might think you're trying to date someone else standing two feet from you, And this is my personal favorite, stop speaking when it's not your turn Merlin…as if it's ever my bloody turn! If you would just take two bloody seconds to pay attention, then you would know…I'm not doing this because of you. This isn't even about me and you! I am not trying to cause a fuss just because I have nothing better to do with my time as you seem to think!"
The last word seemed to echo out against the hall as every person there seemed to realize Merlin was starting to have some sort of breakdown. And maybe later, if Merlin ever got a chance to walk out of this room, he would be ashamed by how much…weakness…he was showing in front of strangers and abusers alike. In front of his family and his friends who knew the worse that had happened to him, but didn't know all the nitty bitty gritty details that drove Arthur's point right into his chest each and every time he dismissed Merlin…like a knife twisting in his heart as he recognized…he was never going to be worth anything. Merlin's fists were shaking with a harsh temperament at his sides, and he couldn't make the fists stop no matter how tightly he squeezed them. But the consort just knew, on some deep level inside of him, he was going to throw another punch straight at Arthur if he tried to touch him again in this moment. He didn't care if the prince always caught him when he tried punching him. He was just so mad, so angry, so…furious.
Because this time…this time he was going to be bloody heard.
He was going to be heard and…Arthur could just suck it if he didn't like what Merlin had to say.
Or bloody hell, Merlin would just drink the poison before the prince got the chance to take it from him…
"…I'm doing this because I would do it for anybody else if I knew they were about to drink death in a cup." Merlin said in a softer tone-refusing to admit he wouldn't allow 'Arthur' to drink a death in the cup that should've been his-but he had his voice trembling so much. It was impossible not to notice the way he was struggling to rein in his temper. But Merlin's throat literally felt as if it was clogged up with the harsh ash and rising smoke that signified a fire. It was so thick inside of him, Merlin could have choked on it. "This so call treaty I have been dragged through is nothing but a farce. Just one way for Bayard to get to you. And if you bloody well opened up your own damn ears and realize my world doesn't revolve what I can do to mess up Arthur Pendragon's, maybe you'd see what was right under your nose this entire time."
When he was done, Merlin took in a huge ragged breath and tried to breath, but the fresh air only seemed to ignite all of the raging inferno inside of him just begging to get out. Just begging for Merlin to do what he promised. And rein hellfire onto Arthur's head. But as he had said, this wasn't about his or Arthur's issues. This was making sure Arthur's lips never touched that goblet. This was about making sure Arthur got a clue. This was…about making sure Arthur knew he wasn't going to be passive when he saw something was wrong. He was weak and a mess and had spent too many hours trying to figure out his life with no answer. But this…this was most likely going to be the last thing he ever did. And death could have been a powerful motivator to kick somebody's ass into gear. And Merlin needed that kick more than ever.
"Consort Merlin Pendragon!" Uther's loud voice echoing out across the room, hushing the Mercian knights who had gone and started hissing at him about 'lies' and 'treacherous little snake'. Bayard either had them just as fooled as he had the consort. Or they were carrying on their act for the king who had gone startling quiet. Narrowing his eyes darkly onto his form in silent contemplation. Merlin had to curl his lips tight to stop himself from shrieking at the king, as he dragged his eyes away from a slightly shaken Arthur. The king had both of his hands on the table and was leaning forward, looking as if he would love nothing more then to take a sword from one of his knights and show Merlin exactly where the pointy side of it went. "This is not the time or place for your marital issues with my son. You do not get to air your grievances to the greater population of higher society. And we will have no choice but to circle back on your awful behavior. But until it is a more proper time for it, you are going to tell me exactly why you think my son's goblet has been poisoned. Or I will have you strung up in the courtyard by your thumbs for all to see."
Merlin curled his tongue into the back of his throat the best that he could, swallowing the smoke and fire trying to come back out. His 'grievances' were with Arthur. Not the father…at least not at the moment. Uther might be more powerful in terms of status than Arthur, and should be far more scarier to upset in comparison. But at least the man had a smarter head on his shoulder. Perhaps he didn't play around with an assassination on his son's life, despite Arthur being so easy going and dismissive of the whole situation. Uther might not like him. But Merlin honestly felt as if he could talk with the other man and get somewhere more then with Arthur. There was no chance of Merlin arguing with the man till he wanted to cry and shriek and throw things. Uther would either shut him down point blank and not entertain him any longer. Or it might be a lucky break Merlin caught, and he would be able to do something about this.
Merlin couldn't do any worse with Uther then when he tried to have Gwen's sentence overturned.
"I guess you could say…" Merlin tried to think of the proper word to describe Cara, ignoring Arthur completely as a man he no longer had an interest in talking too. It was frankly just a waste of his breath and his time now that Uther opened up the door for some actual discussion. "…I have an informant…I had someone bring it to my attention." Merlin decided he'd go with on the spur of the moment. He didn't know it Cara'd followed him back into the room, but he knew he didn't want to bring her name up. This was still Uther Pendragon, and a man like this didn't believe any servant would know what the difference between their elbow and their knee was. He had already been on the receiving end of Uther's prejudice once himself, being dismissed about Valiant because he was too common to be telling the truth. He couldn't bring Cara to his attention for fear she would retrieve the same problem and discrimination. There was a reason Cara had gone out of her way and approached him, after all. Because she knew Merlin wouldn't dismiss her as easily. And perhaps informant was a strong word. One meant for somebody whin knew about the information pertaining towards serious crimes…like where a body had already dropped. But Cara had taken a huge major risk by approaching him… "She says she saw Bayard and he was lacing the goblet."
There were whispers being drawn out among the court from behind Merlin's back. And he could feel the weight of all the stares on his back as if they were slabs of cobblestones that was trying to weigh him down in a river until he drowned. All the cold water that should have been refreshing would only cause his burning lungs-as he tried to hold his breath for as long as he possibly could-to ache. They were judgmental in the worse of ways, dissecting him and making him feel as if he was vulnerable and naked under their gazes. But he had to admit…there was no worse stare than Arthur's. As Arthur darted his eyes between his father and Merlin…Merlin tried not to shift and show the prince his weakness. Funny, Merlin thought in silent and bitter contemplation to himself, how he could feel as ferocious as a dragon in one moment. And feel as weak as a drowned kitten the next. But remember, Merlin had to remind himself…Arthur was not his issue. Not now at least…only the cup. The cup. The cup…..
But there was a handful of men in the crowd that Merlin was insanely aware of…three knights that'd stood the nearest to him when he had been in the middle of swords being pulled out. Knight Markus…Knight Bryon…and a third unknown one Merlin couldn't name. But was positive had shoved his head against a wall once or twice when they had passed by each other in the corridor before Merlin had taken to hiding away in his room. This man was also the one that had pressed his sword again's Merlin's belly…his soulless black eyes making Merlin very aware of the man being willing to slice Merlin up in a heartbeat if he moved. Like Merlin was this slab of beef like cattle was. Instead of raising his sword to Mercia…it was this knight that had taken the opportunity to use this as the perfect chance to strike against Merlin. Either Merlin was a danger who needed to be stopped before he offended the Blue Kingdom more than he already had. Or he could claim it was simply an accident and Merlin had gotten in the way if a real fight of clashing blades had broken out. Merlin was only one more soul lost in the casualty as one overzealous knight tried to take him out…just like he had thought would happen one day. One of Arthur's men deciding to take out a 'problem-maker' and freeing their prince from his grasp.
If only they knew it was Merlin being held in a cage…
But at least he had Gregory, there to pull him away before a stranger stole his life instead…
"Well obviously I am going to need a name so they can give me a first hand account on what they saw." Uther said in this firm tone, something Merlin had feared he would do. If Cara had wanted her name brought into this, then she could have just gone up to the king herself. Or she could have made the spectacle by racing across the room and tackling Arthur for herself to stop him from drinking it. And while Merlin didn't know what King Uther was going to do to Bayard after he'd proven this, but…if there was even the slightest chance that Bayard could return home. He didn't want to send Cara with them. There was no telling what kind of repercussions she'd be facing by trying to do the right thing. Merlin may as well have been signing her death warrant if he brought her name to attention. "So, go on Merlin. Tell me what the name is and I want them presented in front of me within a moment. They might be able to shred some more light on the subject than you, as a non-witness, can do. I myself, would be interested in knowing why she decided to bring this information to you and not one of the guards."
Because she knew she could trust me, Merlin thought in the deepest recesses of his mind. Uther was deluding himself if he thought any servant would willingly go up to a guard, not if there were other options at their disposal. Guards weren't any help. And even if they did help, and it turned out to have been the truth, they would take all the credit as the bravest of men. Never bothering to mention a much braver servant who had risked life and limb to share this information. And this was information Uther himself clearly expected for him to share without a second's notice. But Merlin had already made his mind up long before the king could ask him to do this…he was going to protect Cara. If he could die at some point and know Cara's name had never left his lips, well…his life may not have been a total waste after all. As long as the consort could keep her safe…as long as MERLIN, a ordinary farm boy with a secret, could keep her safe. In a way Arthur had failed to keep HIM safe.
He would just have to be for her what Arthur had never been for him…
A protector.
A confident.
…A friend.
"I'm sorry sire, but I don't think I can tell you what her name is." Merlin said, already expecting the sharp gasps of people coming around him, unable to believe a boy like Merlin told a man like Uther…no. But Merlin didn't care what they would think of him. They'd already seen him with bruises along his face and heard far more then Merlin had wanted them too…so they could stay in their little bubbles where everything in the world was parties and banquets and food and laughter being echoed to the sounds of their own wealth and perfect harmony. Merlin would be here. Hanging onto life with only a grit of his teeth. His fingernails breaking apart as he climbed up an impossible adversary. With the taste of blood and fire coating his mouth. Dirt on his elbows and knees as if he had just climbed through the trenches of hell just to get to right where he was now. "I know that is not what you want me to say. But she told me in confidence because she was scared of what would happen if she was known. I won't betray her trust…not even to you, King Uther."
There was a low murmur coming from the people behind him as several wondered what he was doing, or how it was he thought he could disrespect the king so boldly. But the consort hardly cared…let them watch. Let them watch and be spineless and cowardly…and who knows. Maybe Merlin was the same cowardly as the rest of them. Only he figured if he was a dead man walking…then there were some things he would take to the grave with him. And Merlin lowered his eyes down onto the floor, his only semi-look of respect. The consort was half expecting for a blade to come down along his neck and take him out before he could go much further. In fact…Merlin was expecting the coming blade so fiercely, it almost knocked him off his feet when he heard words being spoken instead of unimaginable pain being felt.
"Well obviously, this is only proof of his deceit!" Announced the blue king, waving a hand wildly about himself towards the dark haired boy. "I bet there is no 'informant' if he won't tell us the name so we can get this whole matter settled for good. I do not…" Bayard's breath hitched, and Merlin lifted up his head. For a second, the king looked at Merlin not with the rising anger he had. But…with sadness. One would have thought it was Merlin that had betrayed the king and not the other way around. As if the Blue King had truly thought they were friends and this upset had came out of nowhere. But it was the truth…he and Bayard were not friends. And the boy looked away, allowing his hair to shield his eyes in a midst of shadows. Merlin didn't want to look at Bayard. Did not want to tempt himself into believing the man had no part in all of this. A man who had no part in murder wouldn't have been playing with poisons. Bayard seemed to get his bearings in place, "I do not understand why you are making these kinds of accusations, Consort Merlin. I thought we'd been getting along splendidly. Is there a reason you do not want to have this treaty come through, that you would come up with this entire story to stop it from happening?"
Merlin swallowed the spit that had been pooling inside of his mouth as if it was an acid fire, before refusing to answer the other king. He knew if he did, he wouldn't stop himself from unleashing some pent up anger on the king. Anger that he'd been holding inside from Arthur, only allowing it out in small doses until now. Anger he had for King Uther for putting him in this situation and not doing anything to keep his son from going too far. Anger at himself for allowing this to happen to him in the first place. All unleashed on the Other King, who had done something Merlin honestly should've seen coming from a mile off…betraying him. Merlin wouldn't allow Bayard another chance to trick him. He should have kept the other man like he did everybody else…at arm's length.
Just because Bayard hadn't seemed to like Arthur, did not make them friends just because they had this in common.
Bayard seemed to take Merlin's refusal to entertain him and play his game as an insult, because the blue king's face had turned as hard as stone. "I see." The blue king said in a slow and clipped tone. As if he too, thought of Merlin as a enemy of the kingdom. "I suppose it's a good thing I figured out all of this about you before I signed my part of the treaty. I had heard things about you, Consort Merlin. As soon as my men and I entered the boarders of Camelot, we had been regaled with tales of your deeds. Most people claimed you had been there simply to start trouble with a man made out of snakes themselves. Or how you saved this entire kingdom and grew the fresh water to flow in the streams yourself to quench the thirst of these people. Fantastical stories for sure and were clearly elaborated as they passed from mouth to mouth until all the villages bordering this kingdom had all of the details muddled up with the story twisted each time it was told. My people could not say which was true…if you were really the type of man who would go so far as to align yourself with a serpent. Or if you were strong enough…smart enough…good enough…to keep all of those who live in your kingdom alive with your apparent abilities to make fresh water flow freely through your pipes. And even when we got closer towards the Kingdom and heard accounts that sounded as equally as unbelievable but less fantastical…how you made a claim to the king…warning him about the serpent trying to hide in his kingdom like the serpent that hid in the garden of Eden and tempted Eve into allowing sin into her heart. How you fought the king again, risking your own reputation to save the life of a serving girl falsely accused of consorting with demons…willing to sacrifice your own for her safety. Once again, we did not know what kind of man we would meet at our arrival."
So…Merlin thought numbly…that was what people outside of the actual city thought about him. It was strange to actually 'know' there were people he had never and probably would never meet who knew about him who didn't live close to the castle. He wondered if his mother had heard stories…but as Ealdor rarely got any news from the outside world, he would doubt she had. But the fantastical part…it left Merlin feeling as if his ribcage gave one harsh squeeze around his middle as if it had grown a size too small for his organs to fit inside of easily. The small bit Merlin had heard was so exaggerated it was ridiculous. But it sounded a bit too close to magic for Merlin's taste. And people mentioning magic around him…it made Merlin weary. Even if he doubted Bayard had any real suspicions about him. But then again, having magic was the least of his issues at the moment.
"And then I saw you for the first time…" Bayard made a sort of clicking sound with his tongue, shaking his head as if the consort had disappointed him. Merlin could already feet his shoulders starting to hunch in, to protect him from words he knew was going to hurt. But it was funny, Merlin thought in a non-funny way, how Bayard could have been the killer inside the room. And yet, Merlin was made to feel as if he'd done something bad by exposing him. He blamed Arthur. Arthur was the one that gave Merlin this complex. Where he would think anything and everything that happened under the sun was somehow…all his fault. "And I thought, why…this is just a boy. Certainly a boy couldn't have done the things I have heard. But it was unmistakable that those stories were made with Camelot's Consort in mind. And you are the consort, so I only grew more intrigued. But I can see now just how gross those stories were exaggerated. If this is how the consort of Camelot behaved, then I can only imagine the kind of chaos Camelot would bring to my own kingdom if we worked with the other. I refuse to listen to a single word of such slander against my character and my people. I suggest, Merlin, you might benefit from getting some help of your own before a king much more ferocious then I am decides to come after this entire kingdom."
Merlin shuddered once again, his fingers clenching tight and releasing over and over and over again…Merlin was pretty sure his eyes were red from trying to hold back his emotions. He'd only known Bayard for so short a time, and already he seemed to have peg Merlin down. Merlin was just a boy. And there was a lot of issues he was struggling to work through. The man had said Merlin needed to get help, and that hit Merlin a little close to home. If only it was so easy to get help. Or snap his fingers and make all his problems go away. If only Bayard didn't seem to think he could turn this whole thing around on Merlin while trying to play the 'I'm reasonable so let me give you just a bit of sound advice' card.
"You sure seem content to pass blame onto somebody else for somebody that is being questioned." Uther spoke out, causing Merlin to turn back to the stoic king. Bayard did the same, a bit of tension crossing his face as he waited for the inevitable. "It has made me wonder rather or not you have something to hide by being so adamant about our consort being incompetent. He has already been checked for mental inflictions, and Camelot's Royal Physician has deemed he is nothing more than having a few simple…eccentrics." King Uther waved a hand towards the man in question, and Gaius nodded his head as if to explain he really was of sound mind. And Merlin felt his face burning with a renewed embarrassment. Though he didn't know whether or not he should be embarrassed. Or shocked. On one hand, it is apparent that the king sought out Gaius to discuss Merlin and his mental health at some point after Arthur had declared him to be crazy in front of the entire kingdom. But on the other…it almost felt as if Uther was defending him. Which was far more than Arthur was doing, standing to the side as if he was only a useless lump on a log. Which was fine. Because Merlin already stopped looking towards him for help long ago. Or perhaps the red king just simply hated Bayard more than he hated him… "I need that goblet, Arthur. Let's see for ourselves if it has really been poisoned."
Arthur Pendragon looked at his father, startled at the sound of his name. Before glancing down at the silver goblet still being clenched in his hand. Arthur was so stupid…with the way he'd been yelled at by Merlin. And the way Bayard had decided to start criticizing his consort. The prince had honestly forgotten he had been still holding the cup he had taken away from the consort..just in case it really was poisoned. He hadn't wanted it to be anywhere near Merlin. But now, the prince handed over the cup to his father, having complete confidence in the other man to come up with a solution. Someday…someday it would be Arthur having to make the decisions. But until that day, the prince was more than content to have his father do this one.
"Hmmm, I suppose it's pretty hard to tell whether or not there has been something mixed into this." Uther mused, talking half to himself as he gave the goblet a little wiggle. He couldn't tell if there was or not, and he doubted even Gaius could without a few extensive tests that would take too long before any results came through. But-as Uther watched the purple wine shaking its way up towards the lip of the goblet before settling down as the king stopped moving the cup-just because it looked to be find didn't mean it was. There might not be any itty bitty white specks hiding away under the rich color that would be a good indicator of poison. But there were still several hundreds of different potions and poisons and brews one could slip into a drink that would be virtually undetectable. Bayard being with Uther the entire time since he'd arrived in the castle, wouldn't even be enough t exonerate him. Not when Bayard had dozens of servants roaming the castle that could've easy done this for him. But then again…perhaps Uther knew of a different way for this goblet to be treated. One that didn't involve Gaius taking it away for testing. "If you are telling the truth about this drink…"
There was a moment of silence where Uther only swished the cup back and forth to watch the purple color bouncing around a if he was trying to see something that he hadn't already seen the last time he had done it. Everybody seemed to be holding their breath, waiting for the king's decision. But nobody would have to be more tense than Arthur Pendragon was. Yes. Maybe he was confident in his father fixing things. But Merlin was still in the middle of all of this. And Arthur crossed his arms across his chest, tapping his fingers rapidly against his elbow. Trying to decide whether or not he wanted to grab his consort to get him to stand closer. Some people might say they were already close enough, as there was a scant foot between them. But it wasn't enough for Arthur. Who didn't think he'd be calm until it was peaceful…until he had Merlin locked away in his chambers and away from all of this. He just wanted to put a hand on the boy somewhere. A reassurance that he was still there and had not been carted off by his father trying to take command over him. But if he did grab Merlin, there was a good possibility that Merlin would start ranting at Arthur about some of the things he had said in the past again. There were a few things Arthur would rather his father 'not know' about how he treated his consort. Though he didn't know what there was to complain about….
"There is no 'if' about any of this." Bayard declared, making the prince jolt in place and turn a suspicious look onto the blue king. He had always known there was something seriously off and demented about the other. Arthur had always only just assumed it was because Bayard wanted to try his luck and sleep with his consort. Which had been horrific enough. It was one thing for a knight to give into the lure and sleeping with a royal member. But he would've thought a king was above such things. Apparently not. Though apparently, Bayard had only been wanting to poison Arthur, as if that was any better. "I am telling you the truth. I did not nor did I ever nor did I try to have another do anything wrong with that goblet. It has sat inside of the royal treasury of Mercia for years, until I found it when I'd been trying to decide on a gift to bring. Then I personally put them into the chest myself. It has been by my side the entire journey to Camelot. I haven't even opened the box until I was handed the chest just now in front of you:"
King Bayard declared all of this boldly, but as far as Arthur was concerned…it didn't really help his case. It only made it look as if he had done something even more likely, if Bayard had been the only one to have access to it. But Arthur watched the other man shift another glare onto his consort. And Arthur tapped a few of his fingers more rapidly against his elbow anxiously. He had to resist pulling the consort behind him, so the other king could no longer have the pleasure that was looking at the little boy's slim form. The only thing that stopped him, was when he noticed King Bayard's eyes weren't wondering anyplace that'd be inappropriate. Which meant he was sorely furious at Merlin, which Arthur would have the upmost sympathy for since it was next to impossible not to be mad at Merlin. But at least Bayard wasn't imagining the kinds of things he would do to tear apart his consort for this insult. Something like…shoving a cock into the boy just to hear him scream, doing nothing to ease the way for him to slip inside. That was Arthur's job-if he had no choice but to go through with it someday-and not Bayard's…
"Let's take a moment, shall we. And say that I believe you are telling me the truth." Uther spoke, finally looking away from the goblet. But the prince glanced back and forth between the two in anxious anticipation at what his father was planning. He was almost wanting for Bayard to be found guilty…because should Bayard be found innocent, then he would obviously demand to have some kind of consolation for the trouble this had caused them all. There was a trickling of dread going straight down his neck…what if Bayard demanded Merlin as compensation? The prince knew there were some people-classless people among the court-that wouldn't hesitate to offer up their wives and/or daughters for a night of pleasure if they had done something to insult somebody higher up. But Arthur could not stomach the thought of seeing Merlin return in the morning, clothes all messed up and ripped as if somebody couldn't wait to get to what was underneath. Hair messed up as if somebody had sent a night just jerking him around by it. Love bites and kiss marks decorating his long length of neck only seen because…Arthur couldn't believe he was going to admit he was missing Merlin's ugly neckerchiefs. Because the cloth at least stopped the temptation of other men as they saw pale skin just begging to be marked…and then to know the only thing the other had taken with him was the large bruises Arthur had placed on his face…it didn't seem like enough to the prince. "Then I suppose there is only one thing to do. If this cup is as good as you say it is, then I suppose there's nothing wrong with you taking a little drink of this concoction?"
Arthur watched as Uther held up the goblet to Bayard, clearly expecting for the other man to take the poisoned cup. It was a truly genius tactic, Arthur thought, already figuring out what it was about. If Bayard refused to drink the goblet, then clearly it had been tampered with. And if he did drink the goblet, then it was clear Merlin had either been lied too or started this whole thing up for his own nefarious purposes. But it might go wrong as well…what if the cup really was poisoned. And King Bayard ended up on the ground. Camelot would surely be to blame if the other king died on their land. But, Arthur watched as the blue king smirked cockily-a smirk that grated in Arthur's nerve endings for some reason (maybe because it reminded him just a bit too much of himself)-and slid his blade back inside of his sheath. The familiar swish of a sword being returned to its own home was little comfort to the prince.
And Arthur watched with bated breath as the other king was stepping forward, Camelot knights stepping out of the way as they lowered their spears so he could walk. Each knight being more eager than the last to prove Merlin was right or wrong.
And Arthur reacted on his own violation before the king got too close, his body taking over his brain. Smoothly moving his way across the foot of space, planting himself in front of the other boy-using his broader frame to his advantage to hide his consort from the king's glare-and reaching out to grab tightly onto Merlin's wrist from behind. Pinning the boy against him so close, Arthur could have shivered from the startled hiss of hot breath hitting him against his neck. Forget about Merlin trying to cause a fuss if Arthur touched him, his boy was far smarter than to say something, now that something was happening in-between the kings. Arthur could feel Merlin trying to jerk away from him. But it was virtually useless as he wiggled about, but thankfully saying quiet even as his small form kept bumping in his back. And Arthur didn't falter or move during that, feeling as if he was a mountain that could not be conquered.
And when Bayard met his eyes as he passed, Arthur's turned into a cold and icy tundra as he narrowed them sharply. No…the prince decided, growing no less tense when the other was starting to reach for the goblet his father was holding out. The prince still acted as if Bayard was going to turn around and try snatching his consort out of his grasp. But Arthur was almost like a feral dog, more than willing to bite and use every one of the dirty tricks he knew-it wasn't honorable for a knight to use a dirty trick. But there was also no honor in losing somebody if there was a way to save them. And there was no honor in the other king if this proved false and he did try demanding a night with Merlin. Arthur didn't give one shit if Merlin was a slut who gave it up to anybody. That bloody…King! Was completely off limits. Even if Merlin did want to sleep with the man for the hell of it, Arthur wouldn't allow it.
Because Arthur knew there was nothing in the world that could stop him from kicking down the door to Bayard's suit.
And literally dragging Merlin out from the room-clothed or not.
And throwing Merlin onto his own bed once they returned to the prince's chambers.
And leaving him there for an undetermined amount of time.
Each one of his limbs tied down to a different bedpost with a complicated array of knots that Merlin would never be able to figure out before Arthur had calmed himself down long enough to return and seek retribution and punishment on the boy for going in the first place.
Merlin's 'services' were not an offer to anybody…
"No." Uther's stern voice echoed throughout the silent room, pulling the cup away from Bayard before his fingers could so much as brush the surface. Arthur turned his glare onto Uther as he wondered what the other man was thinking, feeling the way Merlin had gone frighteningly still against him. The flutter of his pulse point beating faster than a hummingbird inside the wrist beneath his hand. Arthur definitely didn't flinch when he felt Merlin boldly grabbing onto the back of his shirt, the fabric going taut around his shoulders, in a tight fist. Before craning his neck around Arthur's head to try and see what was going on now. "Should this cup does prove to be poisoned. And if it is our consort that has found out your deception. Then I'll want the pleasure of killing you for myself on his behalf."
Bayard snorted, looking as if this was something he should've expected from the other man. But Arthur was displeased, with his lips going so thin they almost turned white. He wondered if his father-if Arthur stepped up-would allow for Arthur to take a killing blow to Bayard. It was Arthur the other king had insulted all this time. The way he'd constantly been trying to speak with Merlin as if Arthur wasn't there. The way it felt as if Bayard had been trying to lure Merlin into his own bed by showing him any kind of interest. The way every interaction between the two of them had only left Arthur fuming, wondering if they were going to have something going on by the time Bayard left. No…it was almost Arthur's right to take Bayard's life for all the trouble he had caused…it wouldn't be surprising if Bayard had some kind of plan to steal Merlin away and have the consort follow him all the way back to Mercia. Not on his bloody watch. He would be the first to lock Merlin in a dungeon cell with nothing but what he was wearing right now. So deep and far down into the cells that only Arthur would know where to visit him. So he was the only one to get the free show Merlin provided…the way Merlin would wiggle about in his bid for warmth until the prince was gracious enough to provide the boy with a blanket. The way he would get to see his how those little nipples on his chest were hard and pebbled and trying to strain through the fabric of his silky shirt in the cold, pleading to be touched and played with through the bars of the cells as Merlin tried to press himself through them to give Arthur more room as he pinched one experimentally. Just to see how Merlin would react…until he got bored and insist Merlin remove the shirt so he could see how rosy Arthur had made them…something Bayard would not ever get to see for as long as there was breath in his body.
If Bayard had to die so Arthur could save Merlin from whatever temptation the other king might pose…then he would beg for Uther to allow him to be the one holding the blade to do it.
"I do believe that this means we are going to need somebody to actually taste it. Just to see what happens to them." Uther spoke calmly, as if he wasn't talking about somebody actually sacrificing their life to drink a cup marked by death. And Uther casually looked around the room as if he was contemplating on who should be the lucky chosen one. Many of the nobles were ducking their heads, as if they truly feared Uther would pick them out of a crowd of knights who had already pledged their services to the kingdom and its safety. But not even the knights were stepping forward to take it from the king. Some of them going so far as to try sliding behind somebody else to hide themselves, or pushing Mercia knights in front of them as them as if they were a sacrificial offering. But the Red King did not pick any of them, his eyes still scanning over the crowd in a slow succession. "Really? Does nobody want to volunteer to do this one task for our kingdom? Not one person here doesn't want to be remembered as the man that saved the prince from certain death?"
As if the knight drinking it would be the one remembered…
And not Merlin for bringing it to their attention…
Uther's eyes continued to wonder about, until the prince went frozen still when the king rested his eyes on Merlin peeking his way out behind Arthur's shoulders. He wanted nothing more than to grab Merlin by a thick handful of his hair, and shove his idiot back down behind him so he couldn't be seen. But there was no chance of him moving his limbs. Arthur couldn't even make his fingers twitch, locked around Merlin's slim wrist as if it was a manacle. Surely…surely his father could not seriously be thinking they use Merlin as a guinea pig to test it out! The prince could think of about a thousand different solutions they could try. And not one of the included pinching Merlin's nose shut until the boy was forced to open his mouth to breath and giving them a chance to pour the poison down his throat. Did Uther expect Arthur to hold Merlin down and force the boy to swallow it by rubbing harshly on his throat until it slid down all the way. Okay. Arthur wasn't opposed to holding Merlin down, as every one of his fantasies seemed to hold onto that theme in one way or the other. But not in this context. Feeding Merlin poison, making him sick and risking his health…that had never been on Arthur's agenda.
Even in his darkest of moods, Arthur hadn't wanted to have his boy killed! At least not for many years to come when he had to face facts and admit he had tired of him.
And even when Arthur wanted to brand the boy and disfigure him permanently somewhere only he would ever see, Arthur'd always planned on having some kind of cream or salve to ease the pain and stop any infection from settling in. He didn't want to be the reason Merlin lost a leg, after all, just because Arthur hadn't been a good enough master and saw to his heath need as well as every other human need he had.
"Maybe we should get one of the royal tasters out here to try it out!" Arthur practically blurted, with so much force that it had everybody turning to look at him with a raised eyebrow. Arthur could feel his face coloring scarlet, but he cleared his throat to act as if the stares on him wasn't any bother, his hand starting to squeeze Merlin's wrist a little tighter. It was meant to be this sign of comfort to Merlin, a way of telling him this was going to be okay. He didn't need to worry because Arthur wasn't going to allow anybody to feed him something that could potentially kill him. Merlin was just so stiff beneath him, and Arthur had to wonder if he also knew what Uther was veering towards. "I just mean, it's literally their job to taste the food of the royal family. This managed to get past them. But surely if we could get one fetched, they could drink it now in front of all of us. We'll know for certain then, if a crime has been committed or not."
It sounded like a very reasonable plan to Arthur, and a smart one as well. Why shouldn't they utilize the one skill that these unremarkable peasants had to their full potential. There was no reason for them to use their consort when there were all of these other options. Surely it would be in bad taste to use the Royal consort as a test subject. When they could just part with a sack or two of golden coins from the royal coffers to give to the family of whoever had been sacrificed. To accommodate loss of wages now that their household was down the pay the Royal tasters would be given. Arthur vaguely noticed the way Merlin renewed his wiggling, jerking at his hand but Arthur was sure his grip was unbreakable. He was absolutely positive that his consort was panicking. Thinking it would be him in the end, and Arthur wanted to drag the boy into the crook of his chest.
So he could smooth down his hair like one would a puppy, just showing a little sweetness to get Merlin calmed down.
Whisper all that soothing nonsense about how nothing would happen to him-not because of Bayard's crime-until the other boy went lax and curled up against Arthur on his own…
"We can't do that." Uther said, wrinkling his nose. And Arthur felt his heart dropping straight to his feet, already wondering on how else he could get Merlin out of here. Perhaps he could cause some kind of distraction so Merlin could run in all of the chaos? Perhaps he could take the cup from Uther and spill the substance all over the floor-accidentally-before the liquid was able to reach Merlin's cut and soft looking lips. "All those royal tasters are away in the kitchens where they belong. It would be taking too much of our time to wait for somebody to go and try fetching one. But of course, we need somebody…perhaps you could offer up your manservant? He seems to adore you. I am sure he will be willing to risk his life for a cause as important as this one?"
Arthur's legs almost buckled in relief, the nervous sweat that clung to him seemed to cool down to an almost freezing level. Of course. Obviously his father would see he couldn't go and sacrifice his consort in front of all these people. Uther couldn't very well admit he disapproved of this relationship by handing Merlin a cup of death and expecting it to go down his gullet. It was just Morris though…Morris was the best manservant he'd ever had. But he didn't think he minded passing the servant to the king in Merlin's place. Because it was an honor to die and sacrifice yourself to save Arthur. And who wouldn't want their death to be that important. It was better than dying from some kind of peasant disease running rampant throughout the lower town.
Arthur opened his mouth, about to scream 'yes!' As loud as he could. But instead of words coming forth, there was a loud and awful clinging sound echoing throughout the silence of the hall that caught everybody's attention. One by one, everybody was turning to the noise. And Arthur let out a huff of exasperation, his eye twitching in a way only Merlin had ever made it do, but he supposed this could count since it was Merlin's life he was trying to save again-when he saw Morris on the other side of the hall. The manservant hardly seemed to notice everybody was watching him. Frantically trying to jerk the doors open in a bid to escape with his own life before he could be brought up to the king by the knights. But the room had gone on lockdown the second Merlin had screamed poison, and all of the knights had stormed into the room. Those doors weren't opening until the matter was settled. Which was another reason as for why a royal taster was out of the question.
"Ugh, Arthur. Perhaps you can control your manservant and get him up here to me without him fussing." Uther suggested, looking as if he would love nothing more than to rub harshly at his temples to ease a raging headache. There was no question about it. Morris would be the one to drink the goblet. And the prince nodded his head frantically, almost eager and mad with joy about Uther not trying to explain away why he was making the consort drink the cup. Besides, Arthur thought as he made to turn back around to face Morris…this was the least he could do for Arthur. After all the trouble he had caused by lying and causing Arthur to fuss at Merlin for 'mistreating his servants. "I am sure even you know how to rein in a manservant despite a lack of progress in reining in your own consort."
Uther's voice had been nothing but a slow mutter, spoken with agitation in the heat of the moment. Not meant for the prince's ears. And yet, the prince did hear. And Arthur winced, his hand loosening around Merlin's wrist. Knowing he failed his father is painful. But knowing his father hadn't forgotten Arthur and his lacking progress with his consort, also meant Uther would not be forgetting to take rein of Merlin later, probably hurt him far more. Just one more day, Arthur thought. Just one more day and he could have Merlin starting his 'training' for a few hours at least. Just to prove to his father that he had developed this new method and could get Merlin to behave if he had the extra time to drill the lessons in. And he could give Merlin a taste of how lucky he was to be under his care instead of whatever his father was going to do…he'd have to worry about all of that later, though. He needed to get Morris and his dumb arse up here to drink the goblet. And then he could keep Merlin…
But Arthur made a fatal mistake when he loosed his grip on the boy.
You would've thought experience would have taught Arthur to not ever give Merlin a loophole. Because otherwise, he would use it to his full advantage…
"Are you absolutely out of your mind! You can't just make any person drink that! What kind of people are you to just make a person drink poison in front of dozens of people?" Merlin said in a hot tone, yanking his hand out of Arthur's grip with strong force, causing Arthur to panic when his hand squeezed around nothing. Arthur whipped back around, forgetting all about the manservant when he realized his consort was no longer at his side. Merlin had backed up several long steps, and looking all around the room as if he was looking for somebody to jump up and agree with him about how crazy he was. But nobody made one. And Merlin returned his gaze back onto Arthur, waving his finger in wild abandonment at the prince in desperation, "Were you not mad at me just last month because you thought I had done did something to Morris? And now you are ready to use him as a sacrificial lamb. What kind of sense is that. Who does something like that? What…what is wrong with you?"
Merlin's voice had been all high pitched and yelling when he'd first started speaking. But by the end, his voice had gone into a hush quiet. Not asking this question to the throne, toward his king who had suggested the idea in the first place. But to the prince sorely. The prince who had been more than willing to go and pinch Morris' nose closed in a way he refused to do to the consort. More than willing to cup the manservant's mouth and stop him from spitting out the wine all over the place when he detested the idea of rubbing Merlin's throat until the boy didn't have any other choice but to swallow it. Merlin…Merlin looked at Arthur as if he was just a monster. As if he was some kind of awful and cruel sociopath, and Merlin had just realized how he was truly not a human being if he could do something that was so messed up.
Merlin Pendragon would honestly never like Morris. He'd hated the boy from their very first meeting on the stairs when Morris had screamed at Merlin for nearly destroying Arthur's wedding clothes. Though hate was probably a strong word…Merlin was willing to admit he hated Arthur. Hated Uther. But Morris…that manservant in particular had sealed Merlin's dislike of him the minute Merlin had walked into the room and saw him trying to terrorize Gwen. But killing him just to prove he was right about the poison…that was too far. Something serial killers who had no empathy for human life would do. But everything was now looking at Merlin as if 'he's was the crazy one. And what kind of parallel universe had Merlin been dropped into where this was the kind of answer to their problem.
"…Merlin." Arthur said slowly, deciding right then and there he didn't like the horror on Merlin's face. It was one thing for him to hurt Merlin and put that expression on his face. But it was quite another for Arthur to not have even done anything and still see that expression. "This is the way things are around here. Servants get handpicked all the time to do something if it needs doing. It's really not a big deal-" but Merlin could fill in the gaps just fine. It was no big deal because it wasn't a noble or knight or some other important man being forced to go on and sacrifice their life for the greater good of the kingdom. No. It was okay if a knight volunteered. But when the mission was proving to be too dangerous, why not send a peasant nobody would miss or notice to test out how dangerous. Arthur took a slow step towards him, raising his hands as if he was trying to ease a skittish animal into coming out of the bush. But Merlin only scrambled back even further, his backside bumping into the table and causing several of the plates to clatter from the force of it. Arthur stopped moving, but still talked in that little comforting soft tone he had adopted. "Besides, you cannot tell me you actually like Morris now? With all the drama he started up last month? I would've thought out of everybody, you would be the most pleased if the poison does affect him. But I know it can be upsetting for somebody not used to our ways, so you can just think of this as…my gift to you. A way for whatever tiff you and Morris had been doing to be over with."
Everybody-other then Gwen, Morris, and Morgana-started to share confused looks because nobody knew what the two men were referring too.
Arthur held out both of his arms, expecting for Merlin to walk into them. So Arthur could hold him tight and keep him close by so nobody could get near him without him noticing. Wasn't this the kind of thing people ate up? Merlin wouldn't hesitate to go anywhere or do anything with him, if Merlin knew Arthur would literally kill for him. He had already done it once when Valiant had been in the picture but this felt different somehow since Valiant had been an immediate threat to Merlin in a way that Morris wasn't. But make no mistake, this was definitely for Merlin's sake. Without somebody to drink the poison, the goblet might as well not be poisoned at all. And then the king would assume Merlin was making a fuss and take him away. If Merlin was telling the truth though…Arthur could argue that his consort had simply been acting in the best interest of him and the kingdom as a whole. And all Arthur needed to do was work a bit on his refinement skills and how to address things in the one way that wouldn't make him look like a total buffoon.
But Merlin didn't step closer at all. In fact, Merlin leaned even further away from Arthur. As if he was hoping he could phase right through the table to put even more distance between the two of them. The consort felt his stomach lurching, and he did not know how he hadn't thrown up all over the prince's feet. It might be because Merlin didn't have much food in his stomach to begin with. Eating a bite or two of peas was hardly going to make a dent in his stomach acid. And Arthur's choice of words …it only made Merlin ACHE for the sweet familiarity of his little Ealdor. For a place in the middle of nowhere's with a forest so dense on one side, you could end up lost for days. A place so rundown, the only beauty was the field of wildflowers covering the other side of the village. For a place that was normal where everybody helped everybody and didn't scorn their neighbors or dramatize the littlest of things. Where people actually had a bit of humanity and showed the proper reactions when hearing something so…awful. And they have the nerve to call those like him, magic users, demons from hell sent to tempt all the good men like themselves into devil worship.
The only demons Merlin saw were the ones right in front of him.
"You…you do not get to tell me you are doing something that is this awful…because of me." Merlin breathed out in this whisper as his chest heaved up and down. Feeling as if he had ran for a good ten miles in the span of a second. "You do not get to say it is a gift. Human sacrifice…that is not the kind of gift I would want to have!" But Arthur narrowed his eyes, creeping closer to the consort but not nearly close enough for his taste. While it was comforting for the prince to know human sacrifices was now off the table of gifts to give to Merlin…it did make Arthur remember how Merlin literally liked 'nothing' he had offered to give him. Trinkets turned away. Gold pouches thrown at him as if it was an insult. And now even the lives of men were being spit in his face. "And you shouldn't want it either! There has to be another way to that doesn't include anybody drinking the thing! There has to be…"
Merlin trailed off, oblivious of the audience around him, when he realized…he didn't know how they could prove the cup had been poisoned. Not unless somebody volunteered to drink the cup itself. But nobody had stepped forward. And without proof then Bayard was going to walk free. And Merlin had just made himself known as a nuisance to the other king…he might try to kill Merlin before he tried striking out against Arthur again. But he couldn't…not if Merlin was already dead. But Merlin had did his hardest to push Arthur during dinner. Being rude and crude and knocking his hands away from him and off his thigh when he finally got his bearings together. And even Clarissa brought up had not been enough for Arthur to let his rage show. And it was just going to be him up against a king…Merlin was already being drowned under the weight of fighting against one prince and his kingly father. What little shred of sanity might just snip clean through it there was a second one he had to deal with…
"Well…what are we supposed to do then?" Arthur asked Merlin with a flippant wave of his hand as he eased himself one more step closer…just a little further and he would be able to snatch his hand out and capture Merlin once again in his hold. But the other boy hardly seemed to notice, lost in his thoughts, and it was obvious to Arthur that Merlin didn't have any actual plan of his own. But Arthur continued talking, hoping Merlin would stay in his distracted state for long enough for Arthur to get to him. And trap him like a bird-meant to fly free in the sky while allowing the wind to carry it anywhere-inside of a cage. "I do not think we can just ignore this and carry on with the party as if this didn't happen. And Bayard is hardly going to admit that he did it. Drinking it is the easiest and most effective way for it to get done. So unless you can come up with something better in the next ten seconds, I don't think we really have an option here…"
Arthur eased himself only half a centimeter closer, knowing his boy to be a slippery fella who could bolt the second he noticed Arthur coming. But Merlin had already thought of an idea. Or a bit of an idea…the fragments weren't completely together just yet. But Merlin could see the solutions to their problem slowly starting to connect and build together inside of his mind as if it was one giant puzzle box. And the next turn of the piece could be the key to solving it. Or thinking it beyond prepared. Arthur had said somebody needed to drink the poison…that it would be the quickest and easiest way for this to be resolved. But if there was nobody willing to volunteer…
"I'll do it." The words left Merlin's lips in a soft murmur, almost as if he couldn't believe he had actually just said it out loud. It was just a huge and wild thing to say. Merlin almost could not believe he had ever thought of such a ludicrous thing. But now that he had said it, it was as if Merlin clung onto the idea with everything he had. Drinking the poison…that would fix all of his problems. It would…it would fix everything! Merlin could feel a bubble of hope starting to fill his chest. It was so huge, Merlin feared it popping would cause him to burst out into this crazy amount of laughter. But it was the only thing that made sense to him right now. Maybe he actually was a little crazy like had been said countless times before. Maybe he was desperate on a whole new level that Merlin couldn't comprehend. Or maybe …Merlin was no longer interested in trying to force the prince into giving him a killing blow. Why wait? It wasn't as if this was a spur of the moment decision. Merlin had been tempted into harming himself for weeks now. Had only finally given in when he started digging his nails into his wrist. And now there was a chance to actually do it all the way finally falling straight in his lap? Those kinds of chances just didn't happen to people like him. And besides, at least this way his death could have some kind of meaning behind it. He didn't have to fade from thought or memory as nothing more than Arthur's first marriage. Not if he managed to take Bayard down with him as his last fuck you to everybody who doubted him. But when Merlin heard a very muted-to his own ears-sound of Arthur asking 'what?', Merlin jerked his head back up. This wild glint of aggression showing in his eyes. "I'll do it! I'll drink the poison!"
There was a sharp intake of breath as people everywhere were looking shocked and dumbstruck and confused, as the words from their consort echoed throughout the chamber. And even Bayard and his men were looking at Merlin with strange and/or baffled expressions. Nobody had expected for Merlin to offer up himself. Maybe his once manservant George, but…not offer himself to the endless abyss that waited in the mysteries of all the unknown secrets that were carried by death. But the only face Merlin saw was Arthur's. And the pasty white sheen that coated his skin as all traces of color seemed to leave him in an instant. And Arthur's eyes started to twitch in this violent and rambunctious manner. It made Merlin nervous…an upset blond was never a good thing. And Merlin bore marks across his skin that proved it. But one would have thought Arthur would have been eager to get rid of him. Merlin had been half expecting to have the prince shove the goblet into his hand, pat him on the shoulder as if they were mere acquaintances instead of being husbands. And then watch as Merlin swallowed up the one and only thing within arms reach that would slow his heartbeat till it didn't have the strength to keep pumping his blood.
"I'm sorry…I don't think I heard you right. I must need to clean out my ears or something. But it sounded as if you just told me you would be the one to drink it." Arthur said, in this carefully controlled voice, doing everything he could not to scream as loud and as furiously as he could. Because he had to have just gone deaf. There was no possible way that Merlin was going to do something like this. But then he saw a grim expression was starting to cross Merlin's face, and Arthur's heart dropped out of his body completely. Not screaming went completely out of the window, "ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND! THIS ISN'T SOME CHILD'S GAME, MERLIN! THIS IS LIFE OR DEATH! I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU HABE THE AUDACITY TO EVEN TRY AND OFFER SOMETHING THAT IS SO LUDICROUS!"
But if anything, Merlin didn't feel ludicrous at all. In fact, there was a strange sense of calmness washing over him like never before. He wasn't nervous or anxious or even scared. It was as if he was about to go for a walk in the forests that surrounded Ealdor, something that had always calmed him down whenever he needed a moment alone. But moment's alone was not any kind of luxury Merlin got for the most part. And Merlin turned to Uther. The king didn't make any fuss like his son was, as the consort deftly took the cup from his hand, stepping back away from him.
The cup in his hand was heavy, much heavier than the consort would have expected. And he didn't know if it was weighted down because of how heavy the jewels or the metal was. Or if the wine inside was thicker than it looked. Or if it was because of what this cup represented, and what it would do to him. The Consort looking down at it now, he could have sworn the liquid was swirling around inside in this endless circle without Merlin needing to move it. It was almost hypnotic as the rich purple shade swirled and swirled in an endless circle, until he could have sworn he saw his reflection somewhere in there. It was so tempting, urging him to give into the deepest and darkest and most hidden desires of his heart. The cup almost looked to be too innocent for what it was going to do to Merlin, too innocent for Merlin to taint with his dirty hands, even as the drink itself robbed him of the long life he had been meant to life. Escape…all boiled down to a little cup. But Merlin didn't know if he was wanting to take the escape being offered to him, now that he had it so close. A little curdle of doubt was starting to work its way through him…
What if the poison hurt? Would it be like falling asleep? Or was his throat going to close up on him until he was smothered to death…
But did it matter?
Because nothing could hurt him as much as Arthur had. Both physically-as his fractured wrist gave a sharp twang down at his side-and mentally, as he seriously contemplated how this was going to be the end of everything.
"Merlin, you are not thinking straight! It must be the stress, he has been under a lot of it lately and it's making him act out in irrational ways." Gaius was speaking quickly to Uther, trying his damn hardest to make excuses for Merlin's behavior. But the consort only shook his head numbly, he actually thought that he was thinking straight for the first time in a long time. He'd been stupid for hanging onto this life for so long anyway, and Gaius had been kind enough to put up with him and make him feel better in his lowest moments. But Merlin was pretty sure everything was always going to end up here. In this lifetime or any other…he would have always ended up with this cup in his hand in a room full of people watching him commit suicide. "If you allow me, sire. I could take him away. Return him to his chambers and allow him to sleep this off. A bit of rest and I am sure he will be thinking clearer."
But Merlin had no intentions of going anywhere. His uncle was very kind of try and save him, but Merlin hadn't needed saving in a long time. He didn't need people deciding on what it was he should be doing, or how it was he lived his life. With Gaius trying to get him to leave. With Arthur correcting him on every little moment as if Merlin was a child that needed teaching. He could decide things on his own. He could decide what to do to his own life, because it was his and nobody else's. But this was also strange…the kinds of things people would think about the second they realized their death was inevitable.
Like the dragon…he hadn't seen that beast since he needed to go down there and ask it how to stop the afanc. But the hugely winged beast had lived in a literal cage for far longer than he'd been in Camelot. And he couldn't help but wonder if the beast had ever wished to die as well. If he ever wished to see a thing other than the stone walls closing in on him. If he'd ever been tempted to try and wrap one of its chains around his neck and end things so he could finally escape and fly with all the other dragons that had perished in the great purge. Merlin could not say for sure if a mortal chain would even be able to kill a beast so ingrained with magic, but surely he must have wanted to try and see. Perhaps he had, and it had only caused an ache in his neck…or maybe he had been waiting all this time because he'd wanted to see Merlin. The dragon had said Merlin would be the one to help bring magic into the world, had said…how had the prophecy he'd spoken of gone…ah, yes.
The son of the man that has destroyed magic, is the only one that can restore it. But the decisions he'll make in the future, rather he'll restore magic or destroy it even worse than his own father has, rests sorely on the sorcerer born with magic already in his veins. The one hidden in the shadows, his silent protector
It looked as if the dragon was wrong…Merlin was no protector and Arthur wasn't worth protecting. Why should Merlin be the one to set himself on fire, just so Arthur can feel the tiniest bit of warmth that came with trusting magic. It was looking like he was just gonna have to find a new silent protector, because he was just…done. Merlin had made his decision, like the aged old prophecy had said he would. And doing this now…would seal a fate for all magic-users. But Merlin could not think about all of this now…he had to think about himself for once. And let his selfish impulse take the reins.
The dragon had almost made him feel special, thinking him and his magic was meant for something greater than what the world had to offer. But as Merlin had learned…special was not always a good thing. Sometimes, special meant having to live sacrificing everything just so people like Arthur could continue living with their happy lives. Unbothered by the turmoil coming from others nearby and…Merlin couldn't live like that.
Not anymore.
"Merlin, this is…absolutely insane. And I think that Gaius is right about you. Too much stress. Maybe I should have seen it coming, or maybe I should have known this would happen. It is stressful situations where you seem to act out the most." said Arthur slowly, bringing Merlin's attention back onto the prince who had made his life a literal hell. The prince who only sought him out whenever he needed him and not a moment too soon …looking at him only as a consort and never as a person. The prince had always treated him as if he was dispensable, could be replaced in a single second if they wanted too. But all these rules in the game Arthur was playing…they were going to end up completely obliterated because of Merlin. And still, Arthur was creeping closer until he was a scant inch away from being able to touch Merlin. The prince had his hand up as if Merlin was carrying some kind of strange explosive device that had the power to blow the entire kingdom sky high. "So…I'm just gonna need you to hand me the goblet, okay? Slowly. Before you try to do something stupid. Okay? I'm just going to take it and…"
Arthur Pendragon crept closer to his consort, making sure he didn't move any faster in case he scared Merlin into acting out rashly. His eyes glanced from Merlin's face and back down to the cup over and over again, switching between the two. It was only when Arthur thought he had gotten close enough to grab onto the cup, did Merlin jerk it away. Arthur hissed sharply and jerked his hands back, as if Merlin was viper that had flashed a dangerous glint of fangs in his direction. But Merlin only curled himself around the cup protectively, holding it gingerly against his chest and between his hands. Arthur eyed the way the dark wine bobbed from the movement, nearly spilling over the rim before it settled back down. Arthur still didn't know if the wine had to be drunken to take effect. Or if contact with human skin would've been enough. He didn't want to see Merlin's hand as it started to sizzle and melt through flesh and skin and blood and bone…it was stupid, and just Arthur trying to keep himself as calm as possible so he wouldn't attack Merlin and spill the cup across them both.
But his first thought was…he could hardly use the new chains he had ordered if Merlin was missing a limb that was meant to be cuffed down…
"No!" Merlin's voice once again echoed throughout the entire chambers. Sounding stronger and sure than he had in a long time. And Arthur froze completely. Sure if he made any quick or sudden moves, Merlin actually would drink the cup just to spite him. "You said the quickest way to end all this is to get somebody to drink it! Nobody else is volunteering and I'm not just gonna let you pick somebody and force it down their own throat! I'm not going to let you murder somebody just to prove it when I can just prove it myself!" And Merlin clenched tighter around the cup, a steely expression coming across his face in a such a way…Arthur didn't think he had ever seen such a tight and serious face on the boy. It was kinda disorienting. "I can see you have a serious lack of empathy towards your servants and it's disgusting. I always knew you looked down on them, it is hard not to see when I first arrived here. But you've crossed a line Arthur. Just because you don't care about your people, it does not mean I can't."
Arthur's jaw went tight, looking as if he had just swallowed an entire lemon as he took this in. Arthur had pretty much been dismissive of Merlin earlier, when he had been running off on his tyrant about all the things Arthur had said to him. But this one was impossible to ignore. Impossible to dismiss. Because 'Merlin' was impossible to pretend didn't exist. And especially since many of the servants working the party were starting to exchange confused and baffled looks. As if they weren't sure who the Merlin was that was in front of them. But just as quick was Arthur returning to Merlin's…absolutely positive that he'd never stop looking at the boy. Especially if he continued doing things like this in their future. But Arthur was okay with all the chaos Merlin would bring in his life. He was willing to work on Merlin just as he had been planning. For as long as it took him to make Merlin a proper citizen. Because at least then, he'd be alive for Arthur to look at.
"Merlin," Arthur said, as he took a large and steadying breath to keep himself calm. He needed to stop thinking of Merlin as a brat who needed to be shown a firm hand and thrown over a knee to be taught a lesson. He did. But now was not the time for such things. He needed to start thinking-for as long as the boy still had his hands so dangerously close to poison-as if the other was somebody standing on a ledge. And it was Arthur's job to talk them down before they jumped and caused a huge spectacle on the front yard of the castle. "I am sure if you just put the goblet down, only for a second-" Arthur said quickly as it looked like Merlin was about to interrupt him. "And we can all calm down and talk things through. I am positive you'll see this in a new light and realize how messed up this is if you do. It is not the consort's place to sacrifice themselves to try and save people. It's your job to worry about the home front. Like when you said you choose the plates, and the banners, and the food as well, didn't you? I think you did a fine job. But it's my job to worry about external problems. And that's what Bayard is. He's a problem from the outside. So why don't you do your job. And let me do mine. Yes?"
Arthur, to Merlin, could not have sounded more patronizing if he had tried. As if Merlin was only good for picking out color choices-and Arthur could lie and say he'd done good, but the consort knew Arthur was only saying it now to get his way-and nothing else. And while most people might have been content to have such a life…Merlin had always inspired for a bigger and better future. Perhaps eventually ending up with a tiny place of his own, where he could practice his magic all day without fear of anybody catching him. Just one more thing that would never happen to him because of this marriage completely derailing his life. But, Merlin found there was a little loophole in Arthur's words. The prince had said Merlin's 'job' was only things that happened in the kingdom.
Well? Wasn't this 'in the kingdom?'
Bayard might have been a different king from a different land so Arthur felt it was his right to deal with him. But Merlin had far more claim to deal with Bayard than Arthur ever would. It was the king who had tricked him with his kindness and being similar enough to himself to make Merlin see a kinship. It was the king who decided Merlin was weak and could be played to his advantage. And it was because of Bayard that Arthur came so close to murdering his own people…yes. This had became a problem Merlin would very much like to deal with. As it turned into his problem the second Bayard had decided Merlin could be used.
Merlin was used by Arthur…
Used by Uther…
Used by the servants demanding his attention when needed…
But he would not be used by Bayard.
He drew a line at some foreign king who didn't even know him, and yet acted as if they were one and the same. He drew a line in the sand for a man who would bring this deadly concoction into a banquet that had been meant to symbolize the fresh and new beginnings between the two lands. He drew a line, when somebody like Bayard thought they could use Merlin as if he'd been a chess piece. A pawn, perhaps. Able to move about on the board but ultimately meant to be discarded when he had finally served his purpose.
And Merlin opened his mouth to tell Arthur, quite violently and in a way that would scandalize the non-knights as they tried to clench the non-existent pearls around their neck, but another interrupted him before he could get the first syllable out.
"Arthur." Uther's slow drawl made both boys immediately turn to face the king standing behind them. Arthur was immediately relieved, positive that his father would finally put a stop to this and get things back on track. They were wasting time because 'obviously' Merlin wasn't going to drink the poison. But Merlin, on the other hand, shifted uncomfortably under the sharp and penetrated gaze of the king. Uther ignored his son completely until Merlin was starting to shift from foot to foot after there'd been too many seconds that passed them by in silence. But he figured the king must have found whatever he'd been looking for in Merlin's face, because the king started to lean back with an almost comically peaceful smile. "I think that your consort's made his stance on what he wants to do quite clear. I know the look of a man that won't be swayed. If your consort is going to be so very adamant about keeping this kingdom safe, then we will just have to allow him to volunteer. As he himself had done right now. And at least this way, we'll know his…informant, was correct about what they saw."
Arthur's jaw dropped so low, Merlin probably could have fit his entire fist in there. Uther's decree, words spoken strong and confident in a way only a king could, made something within Merlin start to relax. He was almost there. His fingers gingerly played with the rounded curves of the cup…he was almost free from this life. Ready to take on whatever the next would throw at him. But god, he hoped whatever came after was a far more peaceful life than what had been given to him here. It was not all that long ago, Morgana had told Merlin that the world would not always be a great place. But it was up to them to live within it. But Merlin had already lived in it. And three months allowed him to see all that he needed too. Merlin didn't have to live in a world such as this. He could take fate into his own hands, take the reins on everything he was supposed to be…a Sorcerer, or the Consort, or Pendragon, or even Peasant.
Why not change the course of his life…
And die simply as…
Merlin.
Even if he knew Uther was only agreeing with this because he knew it would rid him of Merlin forever. Uther had only talked good, making it seem as if Merlin's sacrifice was something to be honored. When Uther would probably be the one to push it into his mouth in his eagerness to get Merlin to drink it.
"Father, please! I really must say that this is too much. Merlin is my consort, surely I can do or say something to stop this! I cannot in good conscience just let Merlin drink that!" Arthur exclaimed loudly, looking as if he was two seconds from trying to stamp his foot like a toddler that didn't get its way. But the prince didn't care how frantic he looked. Not when his father appeared to be on Merlin side! Merlin couldn't make decisions like this! Merlin shouldn't even be allowed to talk in front of all their company. Yet along something this extreme. "Please, I'm the partner who's a higher station in this marriage. Surely I can deny this from happening! My word has to mean far more than my consort's!"
Arthur was talking about the incredibly outdated rule that said women-or those of a lower status of birth-was subjected to all the rules of their husband's. Outdated it might be, but it was a still common enough practice. Where the husband decided on things like rather or not his wife had his permission to work in a place other than the home. Where the higher born man got to decide how his wife dressed or who she was allowed to talk to. Where another would have to approach the husband first to ask permission on whether or not they could have a second or two to speak with the wife. Because a wife-or Merlin, being the lower born in the relationship-was her husband's property and didn't have a voice or opinion of their own. Who could deny his lower born husband of what he wanted to do and nobody was going to blink in eye because 'that was just the way things are around here.'
But things needed to chance.
And Merlin would be the one to change them with his one and final act of defiance.
"I think your consort has a mind that can be spoken. I will have to admit, the customs in my kingdom are much different when compared to Camelot. We usually practice our partners being of equal worth once they are married." King Bayard, who had been suspiciously quiet during the exchanges that had taken place in front of their audience, finally spoke up. And for the first time, Arthur and Merlin were in perfect harmony as they turned a glare of aggression towards him. Arthur disgruntled at the blue king for placing himself within their personal family squabbles. There was a clear and reasonable reason for Merlin not being allowed to do things on his own. Since things tended to get out of hand if Merlin was left to his own devices for too long. And Merlin pissed, because Bayard didn't get to act as if he cared about him. To behave as if he was still the kind man Merlin had thought he was. Willing to go and defend Merlin even when being accused of something so heinous. "And since, as your father has said, your consort has decided to do this. I think your opinion on the matter will now be completely irrelevant. I personally do not see much reason for you to be involved in this conversation at all."
Arthur's face almost turned a blood red as the blood rushed to it, a crashing wave of anger threatening to overtake him. King Bayard had called his opinions 'irrelevant?' His opinions were meant to be the only one relevant! What was the good of being a husband in the first place, if Arthur didn't get to reap in all of the benefits that came with being the higher born. What good was being the higher born when Merlin could just say and do whatever it was he wanted, and Arthur would be ignored when he tried deciding things for Merlin. But Uther nodded his head as if he agreed with Bayard…and Arthur ducked his head down low, glaring daggers at the ground. Uther was king. He could easily deny Arthur his right to decide for Merlin. And the prince had to nearly bite his tongue in two, tasting the beads of blood as they formed under the pressure of his teeth, before he went too far and started cursing Bayard out…just as his consort had irrevocably been teaching him.
Because going too far meant Arthur couldn't monitor what was going on.
Going too far meant Uther would have him restrained until he'd calmed down long enough to behave like a proper prince.
And make a choice depending on what was best for the entire kingdom as a whole, which would be finding out of this poison was real or not.
Instead of acting on his first instinct, which was to get Merlin as far away from this room while he still could. Before anybody tried taking him away from Arthur-via poison or other means.
"So, Uther." Bayard drawled out, turning back to the Red King as he arched an eyebrow up high over his forehead. The King was behaving surprisingly calm, now that his initial anger had swayed some with this plan being put into place. "I hear you're going to sacrifice your consort. But what I do not hear is, what are you going to do if Merlin lives? And thus proves this whole thing is nothing more than something the deranged boy your son has chosen to marry came up with."
Arthur felt his chest when it seized up with a renewed panic and sense of urgency, as he whipped around to face his own father. Uther looked as if he was thinking and contemplating what he could do to the boy if Merlin truly did live through the evening. Bump…bump…bump…the sound of Arthur's heart felt like an echo in Arthur's eardrums. And the only thing he could imagine was Merlin being dragged away from him by knights on his father's orders. Imagine trying to grab Merlin's arm and jerk him back in his grasp, only to be pushed aside because a king's order could not be disobeyed. Imagine watching with an air of helplessness as his consort was dragged inside the very quarters his father resided in. Where Uther would be able to put his own methods for teaching Merlin their ways to good use.
Arthur held his breath when Uther opened his mouth, about to declare Merlin's fate once and for all…
