"I'm kind of scared."
"Don't be scared; it'll be fine."
She considered replying, but didn't, instead choosing to continue staring at it with a scrunched, thinking face.
"Meredith-" He sighed. He understood her hesitation, but, if he was honest, she was being a little dramatic.
"It's scary, okay?" She asked rhetorically. "Don't judge me."
"Ooh, scary toes." He replied with a smirk as he lifted his hands up and wiggled his fingers in her face like he was imitating a ghost.
She jabbed him in the arm with her elbow. "You can go away if you're not going to helpful."
"Just wiggle them. It's going to hurt, but you'll be fine." He said, dismissing her comment. "Would you like to hold my hand?"
"Derek!"
"I'm serious." He said as he held out his hand. He was worried she'd take it as an insulting offer, and that was exactly what she had done. "Take my hand, and squeeze it if it hurts too much."
She huffed, but didn't speak.
"Okay, fine." He sighed.
She didn't reply as she watched him grab the blanket and chuck it off of his lap. "Fine what?" She pressed when he didn't speak.
"If you don't want to do it-" He started when he slid his hand down his leg and grasped his lower calf. He grasped it, and lifted it so it was sat next to Meredith's on his makeshift footrest. "Then I'll have to go first."
"Go first?" She repeated, confused.
"Yeah." He agreed as he looked back to his toes. "Just like this-"
His toes twitched, getting about half as far as an able-bodied person's range of movement, and only lasting about three seconds before his muscles gave up on him.
She stated at his toes blankly for a long moment before looking at him, and letting a smile spread across her face.
"If I can do it, you can do it too." He said when she didn't speak.
She smiled, and copied him. She stuck her tounge out at him. "Mine move more than yours."
"Okay- that is not fair; paraplegia." He rebutted.
"Broken toes!" She exclaimed, gesturing to her foot.
"Paralysis!"
"Two broken toes!"
"Pa-ra-ly-sis!" He returned. "Para-freaking-plegia."
"Well, yes, para-freaking-plegia." She agreed with a sigh before rebutting again, "But also...two broken toes!"
"Are you sure?"
"I am sure." He reasurred her with a smile.
Her eyebrows creased as she examined his facial expression for a hint that he was lying before abruptly sitting forward and jabbing her hand into his stomach, aiming for his scar.
"Oh, no. The pain is too much. I think I'm going to die of pain." He said sarcastically, his voice completely flat.
She rolled her eyes. "Seriously?"
"I don't feel a thing. Well- I do feel a thing, considering the fact I know what it feels like to...not feel."
She smirked. "Stop being smart."
"I am fine. No pain. No problems. No nothing. Today is going to be fine."
"Okay." She agreed with a sigh. "But if you die today, I'll kill you."
He smiled, despite the fact that that made no sense. "Deal."
"Dr Grey, present."
"Jonathan Gonzalez, twenty-six, here due to a bowel obstruction. We were hoping it would clear by itself with a little help from us, but it hasn't. He's scheduled for surgery at ten."
"Good. Now, for Dr Grey who is new to the case, want to explain the significant medical history, Dr Stevens?"
Izzie nodded. "Mr Gonzalez is a T7 paraplegic after being injured in combat almost three years ago."
"Mmm. Three years in the army and...paralyzed. Clearly wasn't very good at it." He joked with a smile.
Meredith smiled back.
"Did you call your friend, Mr Gonzalez?" Izzie inquired.
"Friend?" Bailey prompted.
"Mmm. His wife is busy, so I suggested asking a friend to help him through the surgery."
She nodded. "Right. Will he be here before ten?"
"I don't know if he's coming. Someone answered his phone and said he was doing uh- a what-you-ma-call-it."
"What's a what-you-ma-call-it?" Meredith asked.
"It starts with an A. In the brain. Blood stuff."
"An aneurysm?" She suggested. His friend must have been some kind of doctor, or maybe a scrub nurse.
"Yeah, that's it. He should be done-" He looked at the clock. "Oh, actually, he should have finished by now."
"So is your friend a-" She paused when the door opened.
"Hi." Meredith greeted, trying to keep her voice flat and boring, as if it was just some boring guy. Definitely not her boyfriend.
He smiled. "Hello." He greeted, as if he was saying it to everyone. In reality, the greeting and smile was focusing on just one person.
"You're Mr Gonzalez's friend?" Izzie asked.
"Yes." Derek agreed. "And I know what you're thinking; it wasn't a coincidencal friendship."
"Right." She agreed with a nod.
"Mmm. We met in our rehab's support group. Then I got him pl-"
"Woah, woah, woah-" Derek interrupted. "Shhh!"
"What?" He asked as he looked at his friend with creased eyebrows.
"I don't talk about that."
Realization dawned on his face. "So that's why no one watches you-"
"Jon-" He interrupted when he almost said it for the second time.
"Oh. Right. Sorry mate."
He smiled. "It's okay." He reassured him as he made brief eye contact with Meredith. He could tell she was trying to ask him a question along the lines of 'what the hell is he talking about?', but he ignored her.
"So, tell me doc. Is this lot any good? Do I need to ask for new ones?"
Derek glanced round at his friend's surgerical team and squinted at them. "They're okay, I guess." He joked with a smirk.
He felt pressure more than pain when Bailey bumped him on the top of the head with the chart she was holding. "Oh, shut up you."
Jonathan smirked at the pair before asking, "So, going back to before, everything is all good for the surgery, right?"
"Yeah, your blood tests and scans this morning were good. No solids, right?"
"Food scares me right now." He muttered. "Can't wait to eat again though."
"Mmm, I bet." Izzie agreed. As everyone knew, breakfast was the most important meal of the day, and she couldn't imagine missing it, along with no snack opportunities later in the day.
"Well, I-" He tried before pausing as an abrupt pain broke out in his foot. He winced, hand grasping at the top of his leg.
Before anyone could speak and ask the man what was wrong, Meredith was at the end of his bed. She flicked over the covers, located the source of the pain as his scrunched, tight foot, and resolved it.
"How did you know what it was?" Bailey asked, reading both the patient and Izzie's mind.
"Paraplegia comes with cramps." Meredith shrugged.
"Mmm, well I'm sure glad you knew so quickly." Jonathan muttered with a smirk.
She turned to her patient and smiled. "No problem."
"Do you know someone with an SCI? Or is it just cramps?"
"What?" She asked, confused.
"Well you clearly knew what you were doing. There's a trick to it. Or do you just have a lot of patients like me?"
"Oh- um-" She faltered, eyes flicking between Derek and the patient. She tried to keep them still, but she couldn't. "No, I just- I don't know, lucky guess?"
"I'm one lucky guy then?"
She smiled. "Mmm. Apparently. Now- We have other patients, and you have Derek now."
"Mmm, I do have Derek now." He said. Not Dr Shepherd, but Derek. The pair were on a first name basis. How interesting.
The trio filed out of the room, leaving the two men alone.
"So, you didn't fancy telling me you were fucking the hot blonde, did you?" He asked the second the door was closed, turning to his friend.
"I'm not-" He started at an elevated amplitude, only to pause, deciding he didn't want to repeat his friend. "...doing that. Well- I don't know, not yet."
"Dude!" He exclaimed. "Since when were you back in the game?"
"Since I met the best woman alive, perhaps?" He suggested.
"And you didn't fancy telling me?"
"I haven't been to group since we got together."
"See this-" He started as he picked something up. "This is a phone. Human beings use it for something called communication. Generally, for important things, but also pictures of cute cats. Believe it or not, the dude who gave up on love being in love is a pretty important thing!"
He smiled at his friends joking frustration. Well, half-joking. "Well, yeah...me, the guy who gave up on love, is in love. Really freaking in love."
"Hey!"
Derek smiled. He liked nothing more than a happy Meredith, and he could hear her emotion in her voice. "Hey." He greeted back, turning to look at her.
"Smells good."
"Mmm, it'll be ready in ten." He muttered as he lowered the temperature so he could approach her without risking their food. "How are you?"
"Kinda good, kinda not. Shopping is actually the worst thing ever. No offensive to Izzie but- jesus."
"What about her shopping technique is particularly- jesus-ful?" He asked, intrigued. He despised shopping, but for a very, very different reason than any of the ones Meredith had ever bought up.
"The bit where we have to try on literally every single dress, even though I said I was perfectly happy with the first one."
"Good eye then?" He suggested.
"That or I have low standards and I was too bored to care about the rest."
"I could test out your theory." He offered with a smile.
"How are you going to do that?"
"You could show me." He said with a suggestive twitch of his eyebrow as his grin grew.
"I could-" She started vaguely.
"So, are you going to?"
"Don't you want a surprise on prom?"
"What if you're just so drop-dead gorgeous that I can't control myself and make out with you infront of everyone?"
She snorted. "I'm not sure that's going to happen- but, for you, fine."
He smiled in thanks as she picked up the bag and opened it. He was expecting her to move to the bedroom or bathroom, but she didn't. She stripped off her t-shirt, then her jeans, right there in front of him.
It wasn't like she was shy around him, but it was still a little surprising. He was the reason for that. He didn't like getting changed around her, because of how difficult it was to put on damn trousers and underwear.
"So, obviously, I'll be wearing a different bra, either one that has thinner straps and is the right colour or one that-" She paused when she realized he wasn't listening. He wasn't even trying to pretend. "Um- Derek?"
Nothing.
He just stared at her with a slightly dropped mouth, a half smile and a tilted head.
"Okay, normally I jokely ask whether you're having a stroke when you blank out but seriously, half smiles can be a symptom of-" She started.
"Hemiplegia, which is a symptom of a stroke, which I do not have." He finished. His smile finally grew across both halves of his face, and his lost, dazed expression disappeared. "I do however, have the hottest girlfriend alive."
"Oh." She breathed. "Thought you were dying or something."
"Did you not look in the mirror? You're freaking beautiful." He replied. It wasn't the dress, really. He always adored her hair and her smile and her eyes and her lips anyway. Just...something about her in that moment seemed to set his heart off.
"Derek, seriously, you don't need to flatter me. Compliments aren't really something I require- not one of my love language madodas."
"I can't help it."
"You can. You don't need to do them, nor that exaggerated thing at the start."
"It's not something I'm doing Meredith, it's-" He swallowed. "I physically cannot help it."
"I'm just that hot?" She suggested through a snort.
"Yeah. Actually, you are."
The genuineness made her falter. She could see it in his eyes and hear it in his voice and feel it in the air. He was actually, truely, genuinely, honestly gobsmacked by how she looked.
"Well um-" She paused. She wasn't sure anyone had ever said something so powerful, but yet so simple and pure to her before. Ever. In the whole of her life. Freaking ever. Everything was so self-driven, and here he was, giving her all of that missed experience. She swallowed to try and reset herself, but the attempt failed.
"You okay?" He asked, noticing the fact that her eyes were a little shinier than they were a minute ago.
"Um-" She sniffled. "I had a crappy boyfriend- he'd only be nice when he wanted something from me. And a crappy mom- she was just horrible all the time. And um- you're just- no one's ever-"
"Loved you before?" He suggested, his voice soft, his heart breaking.
She swallowed. "He told me he loved me. Mom didn't ever do that. But he did."
"But he never showed you. He just told you."
There it was. Nail on the head. The world blurred. "You show me. Everyday- I mean- you haven't even said the L-word yet and I know you do. Because you just- you always show me."
He smiled. "I try my best."
She smiled back, and sniffed again. "Now-" She stated, pushing strength into her voice after such a sudden and deep dip into her vulnerability. "It's only fair if I get to see you in your suit next, right?"
He sighed. "Suppose so."
