This chapter is dedicated to FanficScourer35, who wanted to see Gwen laying into Lancelot a bit about Merlin. Make it clear that even if they like each other, Merlin is more important to her

X

Arthur Pendragon had arrived at the physician's home with every intention on having a deep and meaningful conversation with his husband. One that he was determined would not end with them fighting or being at each other's throats. He had went on to spend his entire morning before his arrival doing everything to keep himself as calm and as open as he could be. He had practiced a smile in his mirror for hours on end with the hopes of not upsetting his consort, had gone down into the dungeons to the little room tucked away in a corner where they kept the personal artifacts of their prisoners, and since it wasn't often he had knights in his dungeons, finding the swords that belonged to Bryon and to Julian had been easy. He had even found some old scraps of cloth down there to wrap it in, and had done it himself instead of having a servant do it nice and neat for him. He had spent far too long trying to figure out how to tuck in bits of the cloth so it wouldn't stick out everywhere, but going the extra mile for his consort felt good. A little act to show he was thinking of Merlin, but Merlin had not even noticed his work. When he should've been honored to have Arthur do something that peasants were meant to do…

And then Arthur had asked Merlin why he had left the fields after he had went after Clarissa, a question he had spent half the night rolling about in his head as he struggled to go to sleep. And then Merlin had gotten upset about Arthur telling Lancelot the truth again…Arthur had gotten books thrown at him like all of them were raining down on top of him in a vivid storm, one after another. He did not think he'd ever been attacked by 'books' before, but Arthur's nose was at least about to contest Merlin's aim to be stronger than he thought it may've been. And then Merlin had accused Arthur of only seeking him out because he wanted to get on his uncle's good side…that was entirely his father's plan that was in the works. But that was something Arthur had wanted no part of…it was Merlin, he was here for. Not his uncle. But Arthur's voice had gotten caught in his throat at the accusation, and he had wanted to impress onto Merlin exactly how much this was an untrue fact. And yet…he hadn't wanted to fight. He had came here NOT to fight. And with Merlin's irrational behavior…trying to explain his innocence more firmly than he did would've only set him off. He would just have to show Merlin that he couldn't care less about who his uncle was, Merlin could've been the grandson of the one eye hobbled peasant who had no teeth and was known as the villages 'crazy man' who lived on the edge of the city, and it would've made no difference to Arthur. He still would've been here, making his offering to Merlin.

He should've anticipated that the swords would not be…well received. It wasn't as if Merlin was a knight who could appreciate the beauty of the swords, or had an ancestry that came with a rich history filled with powerful swordsmen. Merlin wouldn't be able to use the swords with his own purposes in mind, as unskilled with a blade as he was good with throwing books. Nor would he find any reason to hang them up as ceremonial items that could be used to decorate his room with…he felt stupid for not realizing that it was an awful idea. As if Merlin had wanted to be reminded of those two every time he entered his room…the most Merlin could've done was sold the swords for a profit. But again, it was useless considering Merlin didn't need gold that Arthur couldn't give him. It was quite clear to Arthur how he had screwed this whole thing up, or at least…he thought the swords had made everything much more worse. But as it turned out…it was not the swords. Things had taken this downward spiral, straight into the pits of hell, the second Arthur had explained to Merlin what would be happening in a few days time from now…

His father, when Arthur had joined him for dinner after their eventful afternoon on the fields, had been less than amused by the situation they had gotten into this time. Apparently, the only reason his father had insisted they dine for once was to ask what was going on…Uther had just received the reports detailing of Bryon and Julian's arrest. He had wanted to let them go, stating the cells were not a fit place for knights being accused of treason. Until Arthur had helpfully-insistently-pointed out that Merlin's assailants could not possibly be free until they had a chance to 'prove' their innocence. It had been easier than the blond had thought it would be, convincing Uther to let the trial run its course. All the prince had to do was mention Merlin being consort, and how it would look with the people if they did not take the accusation seriously. Uther had practically taken it from there, declaring it 'would' be a good show to put on for Merlin's uncle…fuck, no wonder Merlin thought he was only talking to him for the sake of his uncle. But…it became quite clear that Uther figured his knights would eventually end up released, where they could have full pardons and compensation for all the trouble the trial would bring them. Arthur had spent the rest of the meal with silence, eating his food and coming up with different scenarios to ensure that neither Bryon nor Julian would go free…

The last thing Arthur had expected to hear, back in Gaius' chambers, was that dratted knight Valiant being brought back up again. And Arthur had felt like he was drowning in renewed guilt for issues he hadn't even realized were issues, feeling his consort's pain as acutely as his own. For all of Merlin's faults, faults that Arthur could see had mainly been in his head…Merlin knew how to speak and knew how to make himself heard. And knew how to make Arthur feel as if he was two inches tall…he'd never been called out as having the 'emotional range of a teaspoon' before, but it wasn't wrong. Emotions had never been a strong point of Arthur's. He had spent so much of his life being told that he's not allowed to show emotion, that a prince needed to be decisive and couldn't be ruled by anything else, that he had lashed out whenever he could. And it'd been Merlin that paid the price for that…the least Arthur could do was listen to him now…with damping eyes…

His father would kill him if he saw him now.

But all that mattered was Merlin…

"Let's see who the people we are working with here are…when Valiant came to court, the king was all but publicly fawning over him because of his skills with a blade. He was a noble, just like any other man who arrived that week. He was a foreigner though, from some far off place in Camelot, he's never once visited the city before that week from what I can gather. He literally had nothing other than his word, it wasn't like he had anybody to vouch for his character or if he was a good willed person, being a stranger in these lands." Merlin said, with a lecturing tone to his voice…it almost felt as if Arthur was being stuck in one of his private tutoring lessons as a boy. But then again, he had never listened to a tutor with the same rapt attention he was giving to Merlin now. "And then let's go back to the incident we face now…Bryon and Julian. I have not only ended up accusing one noble knight of this misdeed against me, I have accused two of them. And unlike Valiant, these two nobles have been in Camelot for many years. They have served the crown faithfully until I came along. Probably have got many allies, or people who owe them favors they can rack up on, or some other means like family support that will save their skin. If I was not believed when it was Valiant, then why would I be believed when Bryon and Julian have a much more sturdy presence in this kingdom than I myself do?"

Arthur's mouth felt incredibly dry, the political side of his brain easily picking apart each and every one of the points Merlin had listed, trying to find a single flaw in his reasoning. But try as he might…Merlin was surprisingly eloquent for somebody peasant born. And his reasoning's for not going through to the trial was concise and understandable…a foreign knight had been sided with over a royal figure in the Pendragon family. Even Arthur, had he not been through so much because of Merlin in these last few weeks, would've been hard pressed to judge Bryon and Julian harshly, given their spotless records and solid place in the ranks of his army. But that was the thing…Arthur did believe Merlin had been attacked. Merlin, Arthur knew, didn't make things up for attention or just to get other people in trouble. In the time that Arthur had known him, Merlin's never lied to him. He had simply been too blind to see it before now. And he is sure other people will see it as well, once Merlin stood in front of them. Just as they had listened when he walked down the stairs to meet with Bayard when it was clear he should've remained in his sickbed. Though, there was ONE thing Arthur couldn't help but bring to his consort's attention, one thing he felt like Merlin needed to remember at all costs.

"But Merlin, I do admit that this would be a problem if anybody else was trying to achieve what we are. It's extremely difficult for a knight to have a judgement be passed against them without dozens of witnesses who are more valuable to the court than they themselves are. Most knights, if they actually are charged with something, usually to do with publicly dishonoring their families, are just simply sent to retire early to their estate. Nothing more than just a slap on the wrist. This will be different." Arthur insisted, with fierce determination leaking out of his voice, the determination to make sure Bryon and Julian faced the full punishment for their crimes fueling him. But he could see Merlin unimpressed, and Arthur ruefully shook his head…he would make him see. See what kind of importance he held in this kingdom…held to him. "Merlin Pendragon. You are Camelot's Consort…bringer of treaties and defender of the peace. I may have made those titles up on the spot, but they are true. And when you speak, the people will listen to their Consort-"

Arthur stopped himself in mid-sentence, watching as Merlin's face-particularly his large ears-were starting to turn a startling red color that honestly, could've made Arthur wonder rather or not Merlin was about to have an aneurism. He'd clearly miscalculated his plans of making Merlin see reason…it almost seemed as if reminding Merlin who he was, had struck a nerve. Another thing that he'd need to remember about Merlin…the other boy did not like titles. That was the most marvel thing of all…most people thrived on telling others their extensive amount of titles, trying to make themselves sound much more important than they actually were. It was only the truly important people, who had no need to do such prostrating in front of the court…Arthur had a strong feeling that this young boy in front of him might just be the same. He had no need for titles, as his actions spoke for themselves…

"THE UNWANTED CONSORT!" Merlin practically screamed, his roar quite loud, that Arthur almost feared he would send more books falling off the shelves, his fists clenched madly at his sides. And the prince's breath caught, blinking with sharp disbelief as he registered those words…unwanted? What in the world did 'the unwanted consort' mean? Merlin couldn't possibly think, with all the effort Arthur was extending to get on his good side, that Arthur would ever consider him…unwanted. But no…oh, god no. Arthur would learn only seconds later that it was so much worse than that. So much worse than Merlin declaring himself an unwanted misfit of the court… "I AM THE BLOODY UNWANTED CONSORT OF CAMELOT! What do you think the people whisper behind my back as I pass them by? Or what they even have the gall to say to my face if they are feeling particularly daring! I already told you they hated me for being peasant! Do you think they didn't come up with their own bloody nickname for me as well? I am Consort Merlin Pendragon, unwanted by them and unwanted by the crown, just as I am unwanted by you. Why would they listen to a thing I have to say in front of a trial? Why would they bother when they have never bothered before? Why would you?"

Arthur's breath hitched somewhere in his throat, getting caught somewhere in his windpipe, which made breathing more difficult than it should be…he could see in front of him and yet, he could not see at all. Merlin was standing there one minute, all bright and vivid and violent and raging. And then he seemed to be nothing more than a blur of colors that he couldn't register…unwanted all of a sudden had a different sound to it…the unwanted consort. Merlin hadn't, the first time he said it, been calling himself unwanted, though it was clear that he believed it. He had simply been paraphrasing something he'd heard, this horrid title that somebody had seen fit to give his consort, and had perhaps drilled it into his head. Arthur curled his hands into fists on the table, his nails scraping the wood…if he EVER found the man that saddled his Merlin with such a name, then he wouldn't even bother with the law. He was only bothering this time for Gaius, because Gaius had asked him to make an example out of the knights in his dungeon. And now he knew why…Arthur Pendragon vowed to skin alive the man who had came up with that title if he ever found him. Peel the flesh from his bones, make him feel every last agonizing inch of the pain he had made Merlin feel. Nobody got to dismiss Merlin, or make him feel unimportant. Because he was important…important to Arthur. And any that didn't want to feel the sting of his blade as he gutted them like a pig was going to fall into that line.

"People will listen to you, Merlin. If given the chance to do so…you are the sole reason that we are not fighting in a war with Mercia this very moment. You are the reason our men are safe at home, and not dying on the battlefield while we try to defend what is ours." Arthur enunciated, loud and clear and precise, with his eyes snapping back into focus and zeroing in on Merlin when he finally felt as if he could speak without blowing a gasket and alienating Merlin even more than he already had…whispers in the bloody court. God, if Arthur only paid just a bit more attention, perhaps he would've heard somebody speak of Merlin like that. He could've challenged them to a duel, made sure that name died before it could ever catch on. But he hadn't-perhaps people had been smart enough to not say it in front of him-and Arthur couldn't do anything other than forcing consequences onto those he did hear it come from. But even if he had to take down a dozen of his own men before people realized it wasn't tolerated, it did not feel like it would be enough. "They will see that, and they will know, and by the time they see you standing in front of them all and speaking the truth, then they will see your bravery as well. And your courage. YOU can be the one to tell them that enough is enough. And be the one to put them in their place. You'll NEVER have to hear the title UNWANTED spoken in your direction again."

Merlin's entire face screwed up, his nose doing this cute little wrinkle that had Arthur's heart dropping straight into his stomach like a particularly hard stone that would not stay where it was meant too. Merlin still didn't believe that he'd be able to make a difference in the court's decision, didn't believe that Arthur knew what he was talking about, and perhaps he didn't! In the last four months of his marriage to Merlin, it had turned out that Arthur hadn't known one single thing he had been talking about. There was so much for him to find out and so much for him to discover, hard facts he kept uncovering each day that he had not known before. Facts like Merlin being 'unwanted' and people thinking they had a right to do what they wanted because Merlin was 'peasant raised' and it all being Arthur's fault because they took their 'cues' from how Arthur treated Merlin publicly. Sheep, the entire lot of them. Unwilling to make decisions that should be based on their own experience and knowledge, and instead relying on somebody else to do the thinking for them. If only anybody else had known what a huge bloody idiot Arthur had been this entire time, they never would've followed his behavior.

"Just like I never thought I would be forced to endure going through another trial like the last one." Merlin said simply, with a scornful scoff that rattled the prince, though was by no means unexpected by now. "You speak of being the consort as if it's a great honor or something, something that is meant to be oh so important and respected, and yet, my experience has been anything but. I bore that title, and even before I was 'unwanted', I still wasn't good enough to be believed over Valiant. I had the literal proof of a snakehead in my hands and it wasn't good enough for a conviction. I saved your life only weeks before on our wedding day when I pulled you away from that witch's dagger, and so that should've been enough to grant me at least a fair trial. And yet, I was treated as if I was making up stories. Hell, Bryon's family is pretty high up in the noble chain, is it not? Higher than Julian's for sure, but since they are currently being pitted together, I have no doubt that Julian will ride on whatever coattails he'd be able to catch. This is only a repeat of what has already been done. And I'll not have it, do you hear me Arthur Pendragon? I will not repeat the very same mistake I made all those months ago this time. I will not repeat something that has failed in the hopes that this time will be different. I will not trust you to be there for me, because you were never there. Need I go on or did you finally get the message, your highness?"

Arthur swallowed hard, unable to marvel at how Merlin had been able to turn his very own title, something meant to be spoken with reverence and pride and respect, into nothing more than a mere insult. He wanted to try pressing what luck he had onto Merlin….if this conversation had been had just a few weeks ago, Arthur very much would have kept pushing the issue. He would've tried to make Merlin see things his way, and practically roll over whatever protests that the other boy might make. And yet…this time, he couldn't bear to ignore Merlin and his silent plea to get Arthur to stop. Oh, Merlin wasn't begging him to stop this, Merlin would never stoop so low as to beg. But each point Arthur tried to make, Merlin already had a counterpoint at the ready. Had every reason in the world to refuse, and Arthur had every reason in the world to see that this trial went through. It was a battle of wills, but Arthur for perhaps the first time, felt himself dropping out of the competition.

"No, Merlin…you don't need to go on. I…understand your point, and I will drop this line of topic. I hope that you forgive me for…not understanding why you'd refuse. And for upsetting you. You shouldn't subject yourself to them or hear their lies. I'll handle it." Arthur said, voice quieter and softer than the air on the breeze as he lowered his gaze back down onto the table. Merlin wouldn't be at the trial, he wouldn't be forced to apologize to his attackers if things started to turn for the worse. Wouldn't be made a laughing stock, once again, in front of the entire kingdom if Bryon and Julian somehow convinced the court they had done nothing wrong. And Merlin wouldn't be tormented with another memory like his first trial…Arthur felt as if he could hardly do much with what limited bit of information he had, but he could at least protect Merlin from the trial. He'd just need to figure out a way to ensure the two knights never saw the light of day again…without Merlin. "I…I don't suppose, if it's not too much trouble for me to ask, if you know where Lancelot would be right now? You've mentioned earlier that you were upset about my treatment of him? Let me make all of this up to you. I can grant him a proper test like I said I would, see if he really is as good as you said he is."

Merlin was eyeing him with a dangerously sharp glint to his eyes as the blond prince fumbled over his words…it wasn't as if he could just leave knowing that Merlin was still upset with him. He had to do SOMETHING to make up for not understanding why Merlin wouldn't want to stick it to Bryon and Julian. But it seemed as if Lancelot, was the only thing his scrambled mind could come up with. He still believed he was right to tell Lancelot who Merlin was, but Arthur could also keep his word and give the man a proper chance to prove himself to be a good fit for the knights of Camelot. Besides…having Lancelot as a knight might actually be a good thing, since it would be easier for Arthur to keep eyes on him. Easier to assign him missions that took him out of the city, or stick him on guard duty so Arthur knew where he'd be all day long. Places and jobs that would leave him very little time to be anywhere near Merlin where they may try to find the opportunity to…conjugate together. With any luck, Lancelot would lose interest if he didn't have such ready access to Merlin anymore. He might even decide to focus his sole attention onto Gwen, and decide to leave Merlin alone for good…

"Well…he wasn't sleeping when I woke up this morning. He had already left by the time I had gotten dressed, so I guess he went down into the city. Probably to do that stupid stabling job you ordered him to do. Because he thinks that it is what you want him to do, but you see, Lancelot's not afraid of getting hands dirty like some of you nobles are." Merlin finally told him in a particularly awful and scathing tone, still clearly annoyed with Arthur for assigning the other man to doing some hard labor. "So if you sent him down there just to humiliate him or something, because you're still pissed because I spent your money to get the favor, then you'll just have to be disappointed. Lancelot can probably know the value of what a day's hard work can bring…Arthur? You aren't listening to me anymore, are you? Fuck. Why are you even here if you are just going to go zoning out on me. It's one thing to ignore me, but you can't seek me out all by your own discretion and then ignore me! You can do that without invading my personal space."

But Merlin's violent lecturing and angry gestures has faded into the back of his mind, Arthur left to blink dumbly with his surprise. He…he couldn't possibly of heard what he had just thought he heard…had he? Merlin had made this sound as if it was no big deal, if Arthur hadn't been listening as intently as he had he may have missed it completely. But he KNEW he hadn't misheard. Arthur knew that he had not. Just like he knew Merlin's eyes were pits of blue that could've drowned a man with their turbulent stare, and just like he knew the three faded white lines on his wrist were the leftover remains from when Merlin had clawed at him just before the Great Plague had started, and just like Arthur knew there was not one thing in this entire world that he would not do to ease Merlin after all he's done to him. Arthur cut Merlin off in mid-ramble, hardly even realizing he'd done it.

"Lancelot's been sleeping here?"

Arthur watched Merlin's reaction, the way his jaw snapped shut and his eyes went wider than dinner plates, the universal 'I just fucked up' realization that spread across his features faster than molted lava sliding down the length of a volcano. And that was all the evidence Arthur needed, his blood pulsing just a little bit faster in his veins, feeling a bit hotter as the careful control he'd been keeping in front of Merlin started to slip. Arthur hadn't much thought of it, but he had simply assumed that Lancelot had been sleeping where the others who didn't have a permanent residence in the area slept…in the knights bunk room quarters in the castle. It hadn't crossed his mind that Lancelot would've found accommodations somewhere else. Just like it hadn't crossed his mind that his uncle-in-law would allow some strange man to sleep in the same vicinity as his consort.

Or was it even worse than that…Lancelot probably wouldn't be able to resist a soft and warm skinned boy being so close to him so late at night where they'd not be interrupted. Just how many nights has Lancelot been in the city? How many of those nights did Lancelot worm his way between Merlin's sheets and fit himself between his warm thighs and latch his mouth and tongue on sleep warm skin, where he had ample times to touch and stroke and kiss until they'd been forced to stop only by the sun's morning light reminding them it was time for them to move on. It had clearly been all fun and games when Lancelot had been naively stupid about Merlin's identity. But what excuses did he have now that he knew who Merlin was…what possible excuse could Lancelot try to give him? Arthur didn't know, but he knew this was one injustice he could not allow to slide.

"I'm going to kill him."

Arthur was speaking the god honest truth, the low and dangerous growl in his words enough to make a grown man quiver in their boots even when they were not his target. And with those parting words, Arthur stormed out of the rooms, not bothering to slam the door shut behind him as he started down the hall. He could vaguely hear Merlin shrieking behind him, telling him to stop this before he did something stupid, but Arthur didn't stop. His blood had started to pound in his head, fueling his anger and almost making him see red….Arthur only had one destination in mind and nothing was going to stop him from what he planned on doing. He just needed to get to the stables first, and then that nuisance known as Lancelot would no longer be a thorn in his side. Bryon and Julian may be forced to wait, locked away in their cells, but Lancelot was free for the taking…

X

"Gwen, I really do mean no offense when I say this, but I really don't think that there is anything that you can tell me that I didn't already hear from the prince himself. I understand…Merlin is the consort and I really should've put together the pieces before I made an utter fool out of myself in front of him." Spoke the warrior, not wanting to upset Guinevere but unable to look at her either…she'd known who Merlin was right from the beginning. And hadn't thought to tell him any time they'd been together…had Merlin ordered her not to tell him? He was the Consort, he could probably order a simple girl like Guinevere to do what he wanted her to do. It would certainly explain why she had been so ready to give him an armor fit for a true born noble made from her own hands…one probably didn't just tell the Consort 'no.' "Besides, I probably will not be much company right now. I wouldn't want you to see me when I am not at my best."

Lancelot NoLastName had been sitting on the edge of a crate just outside the stables, scraping gunk off the bottom of a horseshoe, as he mused over how he had made himself out to be such a fool in front of the consort. When Gwen had approached him from the east, the morning sun caring this illuminating glow right behind her head…in any other circumstance, Lancelot would like to do nothing more than converse with her. He could probably spend hours and hours just talking to her without getting bored for even a second, but he had so much on his mind right now. Lancelot knew he couldn't just pretend to be normal right now. He didn't have the strength to pretend, not even if he had a chance to talk to Guinevere. Especially not to talk to Guinevere….he still liked her. He just wasn't sure what to make of her now though, after she purposely withheld such important information from him, but then again…who was he to make demands out of people? Who was Lancelot to make people reveal their secrets when he hardly knew any of them…

"Lancelot, I honestly do not care if you are at your best or at your worst. I can see that you are hurting, and I am not going to go away just because you told me too." Guinevere said, and she took a seat on the crate next to Lancelot to make herself more at home, fixing her yellow skirts so they would fall around her slim ankles. Lancelot swallowed hard at having her so near, having Gwen talking to him instead of staying quiet…he fixed his eyes back onto the metal horseshoe, feeling ridiculous with her seeing him in this poor state. But Gwen, gentle and sweet and ever so kind, hardly seemed to notice as she touched a hand lightly to his bicep to gain his attention. "And honestly, Lancelot, there is nothing you should feel foolish about. Nothing at all. If anything…I am the one that should be embarrassed. I mean, I gave you that favor and tried to pass it off on my own. It was so stupid, really…I just wanted to impress you. And when Merlin offered me the opportunity…I took it. I thought you might appreciate the favor that was fit for royalty, rather than a hem of cloth I ripped off from one of my dresses. You shouldn't have had to find out because of Arthur."

Gwen blushed prettily, looking away from him as she scrunched the folds of her dresses in the palm of her hands, the redness spreading down the long length of her dark neck. And Lancelot could hardly believe it, a red flush staining his cheeks…Guinevere had wanted to impress him. That made his heart lurch a bit in his chest, his palms starting to feel a little sweaty…he'd never had a woman try making such an effort for him before. It left him flustered, knowing that he wanted to impress Guinevere as well. He wanted more than to impress her. He wanted to bring her gifts and trinkets just because he thought she might like it and smile, wanted to see her every morning and run across the castle to catch her for all of two minutes before he had to resume his work and run all the way back, wanted to make her laugh and share their secrets and find somebody he knew would be a comfort to him as he would be her strength. He could hardly believe a woman as beautiful as Gwen, could even look twice at a nobody like him.

"Guinevere, I can assure you that I would honestly appreciate whatever you've given me. Rather that be a cloth made of riches, or a cloth ripped off the hem of your dress. It came from you, and that means…more to me than you could ever know." Lancelot said…he could still remember the words Guinevere said to him when she had been handing it to him. A favor for luck…a little trinket to remind him of the day in which he became a knight…there had been so much unwavering faith in her. She hadn't even seen him fight, and yet, she believed he could impress the Great Arthur Pendragon. Because Merlin had believed he could? Or because she just had a feeling of her own that he could? The warrior knew though, that he had to show Guinevere proof of how much her favor had meant to him. He reached into his pocket, incredibly aware of how grimy and sweaty his hands were, gingerly holding the fabric for fear he might stain and ruin it. "I've been carrying it around me wherever I go since you gave it to me. I didn't want to risk losing it the second I set it down."

Guinevere gazed down at the sheer blue cloth in his hand between them, and Lancelot was embarrassed all over again…he was sure this was weird. Who out there walked around all morning with a favor tucked in their pocket? Who slept with a favor given to them by a woman they barely knew, but was desperately wanting to know more about. But Lancelot couldn't be ashamed by this…he's already ashamed by his behavior in front of the consort. He didn't even know how he was supposed to speak to Merlin the next time he saw him…it was why he had left so early this morning. In an attempt to avoid whatever conversation would be awaiting them…Lancelot could hardly imagine how stifled he would be when compared to how free he had talked to Merlin before. He had bared his soul in front of Merlin, spoken of things he had never spoken to any other living soul before, and look at how everything had turned out…

"Lancelot…" Guinevere finally said, her voice turning a bit more serious as she turned her gaze back to him, Lancelot immediately flushed and closed his fist around the favor. He had known it was a bad thing to show her, he didn't want her to think he was being too pushy or weird by carrying it around. But Gwen reached back out as he was stuffing it back into his pocket as if he was trying to hide the evidence, making him pause as her dainty fingers landed along his elbow. "No, Lancelot. I'm not upset about that. I…I like you. God help me, but I really do. And I know that we hardly know each other, but I want us to have a chance to get to know each other better. But I…I came here not to talk about us. I came here to talk to you about Merlin…he's much more important than my feelings right now."

Lancelot's heart had leaped right into his throat when he heard Gwen's shyest confession, he had wanted to cup her hands into his own and admit that he's got the same feelings. That though they hardly knew each other, they seemed to be drawn towards the other nonetheless. And yet…the reminder of Consort Merlin had his stomach twisting uncomfortably. He didn't want to talk a single word about Merlin, he would rather wait until confronted with the man himself because at least it wouldn't be right this minute. He wanted to stay within the bubble of warmth that came with a newfound crush, a forming relationship he hoped would lead to great things…Lancelot wasn't a man who opened himself to women often. He was an 'all in' kind of guy, and wasn't interested unless he could see a possible future with the woman in front of him. He could see great things with Guinevere…Consort Merlin and his lies shouldn't ruin that. And yet, he knew there was no stopping this conversation. Guinevere wanted to speak about her friend…if they really were friends. For all Lancelot knew, Merlin had sent Guinevere over here himself and she was only following orders…he didn't like the idea of Guinevere being made to follow orders. She may be a serving girl, but she deserved just as much respect as anybody else…

"Guinevere, I am sure whatever Consort Merlin wants to tell me, he can come and tell me himself. I am sleeping in his uncle's home, so it's not as if he's got to go very far to find me. Please, you do not have to get yourself involved with all of this. I am…hurt, yes. But I'm just a simple man. I know I don't have a right to feel this way towards somebody as high up as the consort." Lancelot said, a weak smile playing on his lips…he really didn't have any right. Consort Merlin's this great figure in the stories, and Merlin's something else entirely, and a man of humble birth such as him…should be honored just to have had his attention these last few days. Even if Lancelot was nothing more than something to…fill up his empty days with. Kinda like a pet project of sorts. That was more than what most people got from a Royal noble. "I simply need a few days to wrap my head around everything Prince Arthur told me. And I can assure you, I'll be able to conduct myself in a much more…delicate manner."

Or at least, Lancelot hoped he would be able to conduct himself in a far better manner than he has been. He should've been…serving the consort, or at least showing him he was worthy of his attention. Not just taking what Merlin's been giving him, without offering anything in return for the chance he'd been giving him. Just a few days, Lancelot thought…that was all he needed. And then he'd be able to throw himself into showing off his skills to Consort Merlin. He's only seen Lancelot fighting the griffin, and that had been a disaster considering his sword had broken during the fight. He could do so much better than that, and he would do better the next chance he got…even if it left his limbs burning and his heart beating too fast and his body injured in this desperate need to show how good he was.

"But Lancelot, don't you see? Merlin's not going to want you to talk to him in a 'delicate manner.' He's not like the other royals. He's not like the king who will demand respect every minute of the day, and he's not like the prince who will throw his weight around to get what he wants. You speak about Consort Merlin as if he's…the Consort of Camelot. But that's not all who he is. He isn't just the peasant royal who married into the family." Gwen exclaimed, her hand starting to tighten on his elbow, and Lancelot's brows furrowed together. He couldn't understand this…Merlin was the Consort. Lancelot didn't really get it, having met him in person, but he was still the same man Lancelot had spent all of this time admiring. The same man Lancelot had been desperate to meet, that had not changed even after his deceit. But things couldn't go back to how they were before he knew…they just couldn't. Merlin deserved reverence, thought Lancelot…though perhaps…perhaps Lancelot should've known better than to meet with his hero. The hero in his mind wouldn't have lied, or held back the truth, would not have let Lancelot ramble about him like a fool when knowing he's the one Lancelot was talking about. "Merlin is…he's kind. And he cares with his whole heart. He's not afraid of stepping out of line if it means helping somebody else in need. He's NOT somebody you hear about because he's…Consort Merlin. He is somebody you hear about because he's Merlin. And his actions has defined that line since the day he arrived in this city and made it clear that he was not anybody's pushover."

Lancelot's breath caught in his throat, unable to take his eyes away from the depths that was Guinevere's chocolate brown eyes…there wasn't any doubt in her eyes. She was speaking to him from the heart, with her entire being…she truly admired Merlin. She wasn't showing blind admiration because he was the consort, because he was important when compared to people born as low as the two of them were. She admired him because she KNEW him. Knew Consort Merlin far better than Lancelot, who'd had nothing but stories to tell him about the mystery man Prince Arthur had wedded. And Lancelot wished that he was able to know Consort Merlin as Guinevere did. But he didn't…Merlin was a boy whose life he saved. A boy who forged a royal seal, got him his outfit, and the audience he needed with the Prince so he would know his name. But all of this had been done by Consort Merlin. Or had it been done by the plain and simple Merlin Guinevere seemed to think he was? How did Lancelot tell the two apart from the other? Was Consort Merlin and Simple Merlin really two completely different people? Or were they one and the same? Had Merlin done everything he'd done for him by using his consort connections? Or had he kept what they have been doing quiet, using skills only a commoner who knew how to survive could use? Lancelot didn't know, and it only made his head pound trying hard to figure it out.

"Guinevere, I get where you are coming from. I really do. You and Merlin seem to have this…connection, that I really don't know what to make of. But you do not understand. I have been thinking nonstop about the consort for two whole months now. Ever since the village I was staying in first got word of that horrid plague that roiled through the city, and how the cause of it was discovered by the Consort. It was…fascinating. Knowing that somebody who's peasant born, somebody like me, could have came so far in life. And was now helping others not fortunate enough to be in a good position. I have scoured about the entire kingdom just looking for stories to hear about the consort and his great deeds, excited to hear what a peasant can do when given a chance amongst those in power. And then I get here, and I actually meet him, and I…" Lancelot took out a heavy breath, the great burden on his shoulders almost feeling as if he were being weighed down by it. "I just don't know what to think."

It was Lancelot's greatest sin coming off his tongue, it almost felt as if he was speaking blasphemy considering this was the first time he was speaking those words to another. How could he speak of somebody he had admired only a day ago, with so much disdain? How could he dare to look Merlin in the eye, while expecting to see the same boy he'd known these last few days, only to see this completely new person in his steed instead. Merlin was the same as before but he was suddenly different as well. Guinevere said Merlin didn't want anybody to treat him in a 'delicate manner', but how else was Lancelot meant to speak with him? He couldn't just talk to him as if he was a nobody. But he also could not speak to him as a consort, because it felt so weird after having shared his chambers with him that one night.

"Lancelot." Gwen's voice was suddenly strong, and surprisingly stern as she rose up from the crate, looking down her nose at him. Lancelot straightened up on his own crate, suddenly fearing he might've offended her and now she was about to walk away from him-and his life-for good. But leave, Gwen did not. "I am not saying that I condone what Merlin did. But I'm also not saying I did not understand his reasonings for doing it. You have seen him as a simple man from your stories, but I have seen him at his best and at his worse. He's had it tough here, in Camelot. Do you think it was easy going from peasant to noble? Going from a nobody to the most talked about man in the entirety of the kingdom? He's struggled, and has had to fight to get to where he is now. It wasn't pretty, and I don't dare wish for him to live through such struggles ever again. I cannot…I cannot tell you how to think about Merlin, or if you are willing to forgive him for deceiving you. I just…I just ask that you hear him out, allow him to speak to you. I-"

It was probably the longest Lancelot had ever heard Guinevere speak, and the passion and defense she spoke said volumes about just how strongly she felt towards her friend…because Merlin couldn't be anything but. One didn't speak like that because they held loyalty to a royal, and it was their duty to show that loyalty when others questioned it. No…she spoke like one would when a friend needed her. When a friend she cared about needed her to stand on his side for fear nobody else would. Lancelot feared he could not begin to understand the strength of the friendship held between a serving girl and Camelot's Consort, but Guinevere's voice cracking upon her last word had him rising to his feet. It was only seconds later that Guinevere was bringing her hands up to cover her face, as if she was trying to hide the brim of tears forming on her eyelashes. It made Lancelot want to take her by the hands, ease them from her face, just to let her know that she didn't need to hide from him, and wipe away any wetness that threatened to leak from her. If she wanted him to hear Merlin out, then…he would. But before Lancelot had a chance to do this, Gwen spoke damning words.

"Even if I like you, Lancelot, we do not have any kind of future together if you end up holding a grudge towards Merlin about this."

Lancelot's jaw dropped open a little, his heart feeling as if it was cracking in his chest…he had never felt such heartache before. Or perhaps he had…after he had learned the truth about Merlin. Two different kinds of heartbreak, but it was no less painful. It felt as if Guinevere was giving him an ultimatum…forgive Merlin for his deceit so the two of them can flourish something new together? Or refuse to speak to him, and say goodbye to the only woman who had made him feel like this. But it wasn't just him…Guinevere felt the same pain that he is going through. And yet…she would toss aside their future so easily…her loyalty to Merlin was far stronger than he realized. And not for the first time, he's left to wonder what Merlin had done to make Guinevere this way.

"I'm not asking for you to forgive him, I know that it is not right to dictate your emotions or how you feel. I am sure I would be upset too if Merlin didn't tell me who he was, I actually DIDN'T know who he was when I first met him. But their wedding hadn't happened yet so he technically wasn't the consort…but that's going too far back and doesn't really matter right now." Gwen stuttered, before lowering her hands from her face as she breathed in a deep breath to keep her steady. And then she looked Lancelot dead in the eye, completely sure of what she was doing in that moment. "Merlin…he's earned my trust and my loyalty in ways that you cannot understand. And the least he deserves is to explain why he did what he did. If you're still upset afterwards, then so be it. But I cannot, and I won't, choose between you and him. It's just not something that is going to happen. Merlin comes first, and I hope…I hope that you will accept that."

Lancelot looked away from Guinevere for a second, resting his elbows along his knees…he had never thought to ask Gwen to choose between him and the consort. He knew he would never be able to measure up against the other boy, but it hurt more than he thought it would, and…could he live like that? If things did progress between him and Guinevere, if this really was more than just this brief but intense fancy…would it always be like that? Chosen second…though it probably wouldn't be anything different than Lancelot himself. If he became a knight, then he would obviously need to take his orders from the king and that would mean leaving Guinevere during his work. His duty to this kingdom…it felt as if it would match her duty to the consort. And it wasn't as if Guinevere was asking him for something that went over the line…she wasn't asking him to go and use his skills as a knight to hurt or steal from people. She was only asking that he hear Consort Merlin out…it sounded like the simplest thing in the whole world.

And yet…it somehow felt as if it was the hardest…

"Are you really serious right now! It's bad enough that I have to see you when I do my shopping, but now I have to see you when I'm trying to take my kids to see the horses! This is the only time the stable man will allow me too, because the horses are being brushed! And now you've got to go and ruin that for them too!" A young and particularly scathing voice shrieked at them from down the street, and both Lancelot and Guinevere flinched at the sound. Gwen stiffening as Lancelot straightened up on his crate, a peasant woman with far too much attitude considering her station in life stomping up to them. Her three younger kids clutching at her skirts and looking up at them with wide eyes, but it was clear the mother's scornful gaze was sorely on Guinevere. "What do you have to say for yourself, you bloody witch! Stinking up the entire neighborhood just by breathing on it! I don't understand why Lady Morgana even allows you the freedom to walk around unchecked! Or even allow you to keep your position in the royal household for your crime! You shouldn't even be out here where all of the good and decent people are!"

All thoughts about Consort Merlin seemed to flee from Lancelot's mind as the woman stomped up to Guinevere, clearly intent on screaming at her more, as if she was a pest that needed to be told how much of a horror she was. Lancelot immediately rose to his feet, Guinevere's ashen face and helpless stuttering as she tried protesting against the woman before ultimately falling silent, pulled at his heartstrings. He didn't know who this woman was, or why she was intent on treating Guinevere like some kind of criminal, but she didn't get to just walk up to her out of nowhere and start screaming at her like that. It was absolutely horrid to behave in such a manner, especially to somebody he was starting to seriously care about…somebody not just sweet but bold enough to tell him the truth of what she wanted. Who was this woman to talk to Guinevere as if she's nothing but trash being dug out of the gutter.

"I think it's time for you to leave, your kids can see the horses another day."

That was all Lancelot said, abandoning his horseshoe and the tool he had been using to scrub the gunk off of it so that he could stand by Guinevere's side, his shoulder pressed just slightly in front of her own. In an attempt to shield some of her away from the woman's wittering gaze. He honestly didn't care if Gwen had actually done something to upset this woman, though he truly doubted it could be anything that would make some random woman cause a scene such as this, he just wanted her to go. She was upsetting Guinevere, and that was really the only thing Lancelot needed to know. Nobody should have to put up with being called a…bloody witch, and demand somebody be fired simply for existing. Guinevere had been doing nothing but standing there and talking to him, neither of them probably would've noticed the woman trying to peek in through the doors of the royal stables so her children could see only a glimpse of the horses inside before they continued on, if the woman hadn't started this whole thing.

"Excuse me?" The woman reeled back, blinking in surprise when she realized her intended target was not as alone as she had thought. A man twice the size of her was clearly a much larger threat than a young girl was, but the mother recovered, straightening her spine up. After all, Lancelot was clearly nothing more than a stable boy, in the mother's opinion. And would hardly be anymore dangerous than one of her own children, the mother even had the nerve to waggle her finger at him as if he WAS one of her children, behaving naughty and disobedient and in need of a good spanking. "Do you have not a single clue who that woman behind you is? Do you know who you are trying to protect? Or what she has done! Other people might be willing to let her go, the king himself might've even been convinced by her innocence, but you cannot tell me different! She was accused for a reason, and it wouldn't surprise me if she bloody well hoodwinked the king himself! She's a bloody witch! And every person out there knows that a witch should BURN!"

Lancelot's breath escaped his lungs, he hasn't understood half of what she'd told him just now, but the pieces were there for Lancelot to pick up on. Gwen had been accused…accused of witchcraft? Was that why the woman kept on calling Gwen a witch…truly believing Guinevere to be some nasty old hag who cast spells and potions in her spare time in order to mess up the lives of those in the village? Or at least, that was the popular opinion on magic users, though Lancelot hadn't met nearly enough personally to decide what he really thought about them. He knew his parents were witch sympathizers, and that had made him keep an open mind on the sore topic that ran among the kingdom. But…he somehow couldn't see Guinevere being a witch. He knew it was impossible to tell from sight alone, but just a glance over his shoulder to where Guinevere is now shaking like a leaf, made it even harder for him to see her being one.

"You know ma'am, I really don't know anything that's been going on here, and I don't exactly know Guinevere's part in it. But I do know that she is a very kind and sweet woman, who will do anything for her friends, and that's really all the things I need to know." Lancelot said bluntly, he wanted to also include that he wouldn't care if she WAS a witch. She was still the same kind and beautiful girl Lancelot was besotted with. Just as Merlin was still the same boy who'd risked everything, even his standing in polite society, for him…Lancelot bit back what was sure to be a curse when he noticed this comparison. But Guinevere's with him now, not Merlin…she needed to be his focus. "Besides, I think the one and only witch I see here, is the one screaming in the middle of the courtyard and making a scene in front of everybody."

The woman gasped sharply, bringing a hand up to her chest as if he'd gone and slapped her across the face…perhaps it had been quite rude of him to say something like that. He usually wasn't so crass or cross, especially when faced with a woman, a young mother of three. Women had enough trouble in a world like this without men adding to it, and yet, he couldn't find it in himself to show sympathy for such a creature. She was the one that came and interrupted their conversation in the first place, the one that had started this in front of her own children…Lancelot was just finishing it. With his words this time, instead of his blade against a threatening opponent.

"Why I never…you, young man, should know better than to talk to people like that. I am simply speaking the truth of the matter, and I am hardly the only one who's said this. That girl is a witch! And it can't be forgotten just because she gets to walk around with the rest of us." The woman sneered at him, looking so ridiculous in her oversized dress, her dark bandana pulling oily hair out of her face, pointing a gangly finger over Lancelot's shoulder towards Gwen. "I won't subject my children being in her presence! I won't allow her to put my children in danger! She's nothing but an animal that should be caged up until the pyre is lit!"

And with those parting words, the woman snatched up the hands of two of her children and started jerking them away, forcing the eldest one to chase after in an attempt to not get left behind. And all the while, hissing at them to stay far away from Guinevere because she might curse them into toads and use their spleens for her wicked spells. Lancelot bristled, his lips thinning and wanting nothing more than to chase after her and demand she show some respect for Guinevere. He hadn't met many women who'd choose a friend over her future, and that only made him respect her more for it. But what was he supposed to do against a woman. It wasn't as if he could throw a glove down at her feet to initiate a sword challenge. There was no honor in fighting a woman who could not possibly fight back…a soft hand landed on his elbow, bringing Lancelot to reality and back to Guinevere. Her expression so sad but resolute…as if she is preparing for him to leave her here by herself. Too ashamed of what happened to be seen with her any longer…

X

"Arthur! This is absolutely nuts! I don't know what you think is going on but not a single thing happened! Lancelot just needed a place to sleep, it's not as if we went on a date! He was healing! I live with a physician! Where else is he meant to go!" Merlin Pendragon was shrieking, nearly stumbling over his own feet as he followed Arthur down the main staircase of the castle. He had to catch onto the railing to prevent himself from spilling down them. But Merlin didn't care to stop, because Arthur wasn't stopping. The prince was relentless in his storming walk, already making his way down the stairs that led out of the castle. "This is madness you absolute possessive fucking creep! What do you think happened between us! I didn't go on a date with him! Or kissed him! Or…we had a single bloody breakfast together! That does not mean you get to attack somebody!"

If Merlin didn't know any better, he would think Arthur wasn't paying attention to him…god, this was so embarrassing! People were starting to stop and look at them as they passed them by, clearly wondering what was going on but not being brave enough to stop the prince and question him. But everything Merlin said only seemed to make Arthur speed up…he was hearing him. But ignoring him…Merlin was probably even making things worse by admitting he'd eaten breakfast with Lancelot. That right there sounded like a date. But going after Lancelot like this was just crazy, it was over the top…Merlin wanted to take off his bloody boot and throw it as hard as he could at Arthur's stupidly neat head of hair, maybe that would make him stop and think this through. But Merlin felt scared that, by the time he stopped to take his boot off, Arthur would be gone by the time he looked back up.

"Arthur Pendragon, you cannot bloody well attack everybody just because you think they are interested in me! What are you going to do the next time Gaius has to help somebody and they need to stay overnight! Are you going to jump them as well?" Merlin continued to scream madly…possessive was starting to take on a whole new meaning to Merlin. Arthur had beaten him once because of this possessiveness of his, and Merlin had felt as if it was his fault. But this was now Arthur attacking other people because of it! Merlin wasn't going to look over his shoulder and hesitate to talk to every man he met just because Arthur got it into his stupid fucking head that Merlin was dating them! Stupid rumors and stupid Arthur for believing them and stupid fucking princes who thought killing people was the proper response for this situation. "Will you just stop for one second and talk to me! What can I possibly do to prove to you I've got no interest in Lancelot! Have you gone insane? Arthur…Arthur Pendragon!"

…Merlin didn't think Arthur was kidding about killing Lancelot. The prince wore a face like stone, each step more purposeful then the last, and Merlin was the one that had told him exactly where Lancelot would be, as they started across the cobblestone walkway towards where the stables were located. It sent such a violent string of fear to slither through his core…he hoped Lancelot really did have the skills necessary to beat somebody like Arthur. A normal Arthur hadn't lost a fight, but a pissed Arthur…looked as if Lancelot wouldn't have a chance to defend himself proper. Merlin only hoped he could get Arthur to see reason or sense before Lancelot ended up dead because of him. Merlin REFUSED to have Lancelot's death resting on his head…

X

Guinevere sat perched on the edge of her crate, playing quietly with the tips of her fingers, sniffling softly to herself. She had wanted to leave as soon as that woman had left, before Lancelot had the chance to send her away after what that woman had told him. But Lancelot had surprised her by insisting she take a seat, and now he was just sitting by her side on his own crate. Waiting with a patience she didn't know men could possess, for her to speak up. The minutes had dragged by, and Gwen hadn't dared to lift her head, not wanting to see his face if there was disgust waiting there. The scene that woman had caused…it's something she had never wanted somebody she knew to see. It wasn't often a scene like that happened, not now anyway, but it shook her up every time that it did. People who'd been accused of witchcraft didn't always get pardoned by the people, even after they'd been released to rejoin the general public.

What the woman actually did was pretty mild compared to some of the things that had happened in the earlier days after her release. There had been many people who claimed she shouldn't be trusted to work so close to the royals, a few vendors from the market had refused to sell to her, and many would cross the street if they saw her coming. As if they thought she was going to cast any kind of curse at them if they caught her eye. She'd spent weeks staying in the castle instead of going home to her father because she was scared he would suffer the same backlash as she was. There had even been a time where she was scared people would start to get violent against her, though it had never gone that far. Most people had gotten bored though, and moved onto better things. There was still people though, like that woman, who made Gwen feel as if she had just jumped ten steps back in her healing. She'd been doing better, talking and smiling and even…confessing to somebody out of her league. But then that woman showed up, and reminded Gwen how lucky she was to still be alive after her ordeal two months ago.

"…You probably shouldn't be letting me sit here with you. The stable hand may think you're a witch sympathizer next if he knows we know each other. He may even take your job here away for it." Gwen finally said, when she finally felt like she was no longer going to throw up if she talked, reaching up to tug harsh on one of her erect curls. She had been so stupid to think people had forgotten of her arrest all those months ago, so stupid to believe she could really continue her life without being harassed like this. There was a reason she had not said a word about any of this to Merlin, and the embarrassment of her situation stung even more under the weight of Lancelot's stare. Gwen went back to playing on her fingers, knowing she would never forgive herself if Lancelot started to get cast out because of her. "…You probably want to know what she was going on about, don't you? But I mean…she pretty much told you I got arrested and that it was for witchcraft. I mean, I was pardoned by the king! But…you probably do want to know more details. So you can decide whether or not you want to even associate with me anymore…"

Gwen's insides quivered a little…she had been so sure of herself earlier, when she had told Lancelot she would always side with Merlin over him. And that is very much true, her friendship meant more to her than any guy could've hoped to compete with. Gwen didn't exactly have a multitude of men knocking on her door, so having somebody show interest in her wasn't exactly something very common to her. But her friendship with Merlin…it was something solid and real and…she had never had a friend go through as much lengths for her as Merlin had done for her. Helping him get back on his feet during his depression is the very least she could do, but standing beside him now when he didn't need her too…it was something else entirely. But now that it was Lancelot who had the choice to leave, who could decide being seen with 'the witch' was too much to handle, made her scared. It was as if Lancelot was saying she wasn't enough for him, wasn't good enough for the risk. Merlin wouldn't have cared about the risk, he would probably even make more of an effort to be seen with her every minute of every day if he knew that was what she was thinking…a warm hand landed on her own, making her fingers pause.

"Guinevere, you can tell me whatever you want to tell me. Or you can tell me not a thing if you want instead. I know you don't always like to talk, so if you'd rather we just sit here, I'm okay with that. But I am willing to listen, to you. And not to whatever spiteful thing that woman had to say." Lancelot said and Gwen blinked up at him in astonishment. She had honestly been preparing for him to leave her here, to start walking the other way every time he saw her, to behave as if the two of them had never met. As if Gwen hadn't risked ending up going straight back to the cells for helping Merlin forge Lancelot into the fake noble he was supposed to be. But as it turned out, Lancelot seemed to be far more noble than any actual noble she had ever met. "I just hope that you know, what you decide to tell me or not to tell me…it's entirely up to you. And I won't leave you. I swear that to you."

Gwen's throat felt tight, a wetness starting to form in her eyes and making the long length of her lashes clump together…Lancelot wasn't pressuring her into saying anything. He was leaving the decision and the choice entirely inside her hands, and Gwen honestly believed him…Lancelot wasn't going to leave. It felt as if the tightness in her chest was starting to ease up…she felt freer. Lancelot not pressuring her into speaking actually made her feel as if she could talk and say whatever she wanted, and he wouldn't judge her for it. Gwen could explain everything to him, even the things she had been hesitant to tell Morgana. The things she didn't tell Merlin, because he already had so much on his plate. She could tell him how the knights had dragged her from Morgana's chambers that very dark month where the plague had ran amok in the city, could tell him how she had pleaded for mercy when Uther said she was to die. How she had sat in her cells for three days straight while they readied her pyre, how Morgana and Merlin had been her only visitors. How she'd been in this horrid catatonic state by the time the sun rose on the third day, how she was only here today due to what Merlin had done for her…

"Merlin saved my life." Was the very first thing Gwen said on the subject, and it was clear that she had captured Lancelot's complete and utter attention with these few simple words. But they were true…people could say whatever it was that they wanted about Merlin. But she was ALWAYS going to be his defender, as much as she was able too. He was a hero, and it shouldn't be forgotten just because people were petty and liked spreading untrue things about him. "You need to forget about everything you heard about Consort Merlin. Forget what stories you've heard about him, and forget about the great deeds or the great tragedies he may've caused. Because I can assure you, whatever tales being spread about him outside of the kingdom…they are nothing when compared to seeing the real thing in front of you. There is nothing in the world compared to Merlin standing in front of you and saying…I'm going to help you. Not Consort Merlin who needs to be what the world tells him to be, and still manages to go defying the expectations meant to make him fail. But regular Merlin, the simple farm boy who is willing to risk it all because you need him too. Merlin is willing to go above and beyond to help people, and that…that is what will make him a great Consort. It's what makes him a hero…makes him my friend."

Gwen trailed off, breathing in deeply and feeling her lungs expanding as a brief gust of wind rolled by them…Lancelot was still looking at her, utterly wrapped in her words. Gwen didn't know if it was 'her' he was enchanted by, or if it was the way she was speaking about Merlin, but perhaps it didn't matters. Perhaps it was for both reasons, or perhaps it was something else entirely. The one and only thing that mattered, was if Lancelot listened to her. She owed Merlin a lot, for everything actually. And if she could make even one other person see him as she saw him, then…it would make all of her pain worth it. Because despite her terror of being locked in those cells again, with an execution hanging over her head…it had given her one hell of a story to tell. Not something she liked to share, of course, but an experience to show people she didn't follow Merlin just because he was royal and she was meant too. What she had for Merlin is totally different than what she had for Arthur and Uther…choosing to give her loyalty to someone made her feel more secure with herself. Rather than going along with who she was told to follow because she had been born in a certain kingdom…

"Lancelot, do you know what it feels like to have death hanging over your head and ready to be cast down upon you at any moment? Do you know what it can feel like, having the minutes pass you by and yet feeling as if it was an eternity you couldn't escape from? Do you know what it feels like being in the dark and waiting for somebody else to decide your fate? To wonder if you'll be forgotten about after you're gone, only one more number in the chain of injustices that'll haunt this world long after each of us are gone?" Gwen asked him, still staring off far ahead in the sky, her mind a million miles away from where her body has been sitting. She vaguely noted Lancelot nodding his head out of the corner of her eye, and the look echoed in his eyes…it almost mirrored her own. Scarred over by the years since whatever had happened, but still present nonetheless. That actually made it easier for Gwen to speak, feeling the kindred connection tentatively starting to form between the two of them…two people who'd been tormented by their pasts. But made stronger because of the pain. Guinevere had gotten help from Merlin…had Lancelot received any help from whatever it was that had plagued him? "Merlin didn't forget me. He worked himself down to the bone, didn't sleep while I was down there. This was all happening during the plague that wrecked Camelot, so I'm sure as you can imagine, he would've had a thousand other things to do being Consort. Anybody else would've left me to suffer my fate and felt no guilt about it, resting easy because they had spent the rest of their time dealing with the city as a whole. And that…that is what makes Merlin different from Uther and Arthur. They see the kingdom as a whole. And every decision they make reflects on the greatest chance that they will succeed. Merlin though…he sees the people themselves. Individuals. And I don't think he would ever leave somebody to suffer, if he could do something to help. I'm literally living proof of that…"

Gwen trailed off once again, feeling Lancelot's hand tighten around her own…it was the most she had ever spoken about her experience. And it felt like a large amount of pressure was starting to come off her chest, explaining all of this to somebody else…perhaps that had been exactly what she had needed. Gwen's kept all of this bottled up for so long, and now that she had cracked open the lid, it was starting to spew out of her like a never ending explosion. This might have been the one thing she needed to heal completely…or perhaps it wouldn't heal her completely. She feared she was always going to have the nightmares, be cautious when she got too close to the cells, worry she'd end up right back where she started, only without a Merlin there to be the shining star emerging from the darkness. But perhaps…perhaps by the time she was finished…she'd be able to close that chapter of her life. Move onto whatever the next thing the mysteries of life had for her to face.

"The kind of…trauma that I went through, it leaves a mark that's not visible. A way of saying…I've been hurt and I don't know how to process it. For me, I had it really hard speaking. Nobody believed me when I somehow got accused for starting the plague, and the guards didn't listen to me when I tried explaining I was innocent. And there was nobody to talk to in my cells other than the times Merlin and Morgana came down to visit me…I retreated into myself. And even if all this time has passed, it sometimes feels as if no time at all has passed. As if all of this is…just a dream that I could wake up from at any moment. And when I do wake up…I might still be in those dratted cells. I didn't know how to act or behave because I was positive the slightest infraction would lead to me being arrested again, or perhaps something even worse…" Gwen trailed off, and she turned around on her crate so that she was facing Lancelot more, the warrior was nodding along to every word she said, looking as if he truly understood what she was talking about. And Gwen had to wonder…had the same tragedy befallen Lancelot? Perhaps not the same incident, but had Lancelot also dealt with the same symptoms of whatever trauma he had lived through. "And then Merlin showed up at my home. And he brought you with him, asking me to go breaking the law for him, with full knowledge of what I was doing, just to help you look as if you could be a nobleman."

Gwen glanced down at the hand around hers when it tightened, and she gave Lancelot a very tight lipped smile. She could see the questions and the horror in his eyes, written all over his face…she knew what he was asking without him saying a single word to her. He wanted to know how she could've done it, how she could've risk it all…her freedom, her life, and her future…all because a boy had asked her too. Oh, but if only Lancelot truly understood that Merlin wasn't 'any' boy. Gwen wouldn't risk as much as she had been, unless she found the cause to be something truly worthwhile. She wouldn't do something like this if she was being paid in gold or in riches or in status, she knew that there's some things that aren't worth the risk just for a life of comfort. But for a friend…for a stranger who could help make the streets feel safer with somebody who could 'understand' the problems faced by people in the lower town…well. She could hardly say no to something as important as that. What was life meant to be, if one didn't take a risk in order to make a change for the better.

"You came here all this way for your dream, yes? You trained yourself to be the best knight that you could possibly be, probably worked tirelessly for years to achieve this dream. Just so you can be a Knight of Camelot, protector of those who can't protect themselves, yes?" Gwen asked Lancelot, already knowing of the answer she would get, as Lancelot nodded his head in agreement. Being a protector of the people, she thought quietly to herself, with a small and private smile…it had a nice ring to it. Lancelot would look good, walking among all the small and quiet streets of the lower town, dressed in the red capes that'd been worn by Camelot knights for generations yet. "Well, Lancelot…I've also got this dream of my own. A dream where I can walk to work in the palace without any fear of the men that are supposed to protect us. A dream where I can walk into the castle with my head held high, proud of where I come from and proud of all the changes I have bore witness to in Camelot. Changes that I know will come, for as long as Merlin remains in the heart of Camelot. You haven't been here all that long, you haven't seen the changes that have already started to happen to this city. If you'd been here before Merlin arrived…then you would know what I am talking about…"

Gwen trailed off there softly, her private smile growing just a bit wider as she looked up towards the heavens. Despite feeling as if she could tell Lancelot all she wanted and not be judged about it, she didn't know how to put what she's trying to say into words. Merlin had done many great things during his time in the kingdom, but there hadn't been any big 'changes' that happened. There's probably some people living in the kingdom who also wouldn't know what she was going on about. There was no…honoring the consort, no huge banners to carry his face or an alternate crest to distinguish himself from the Pendragon line. No new laws that were only created by the consort, no regimes that were redone, no protocols in the castle that have been changed…if it wasn't for the people keeping Merlin's deeds alive through their whispers, one may not even know he had ever been there. And yet…there was something brimming on the air. Something on the horizon that carried her hope for the future…something that made the air taste just a bit sweeter as she breathed it in. As if there was an entire world of possibilities that had previously been closed to her before.

"Merlin didn't gain my loyalty by marrying royalty…he earned it by becoming my friend first."

Gwen finished her grand speech with those parting words, and she allowed her fingers to fall open without looking at the man at her side, letting his much thicker digits to slide between her own so that they were holding hands and not just resting on top of each other. Gwen was sure, as little as she had met them, there were kind nobles out there. Nobles like Morgana who treated their servants properly, and one could even confuse that kindness for them being friends. But Gwen knew that she wasn't confused, and knew she wasn't simply blurring the lines between consort and serving girl…Merlin was her friend. First and foremost. And he would be even long after finding his proper footing and becoming the greatest consort this land had ever known…she truly believed that he could do it. And until then…Gwen would be there, lending her support with whatever crazy adventure Merlin found himself tossed into.

"I cannot say that I…completely understand how much devote loyalty you can hold towards one man, but perhaps you are right and I simply haven't seen him as I should yet. He has done much for me as well, in the short time that I have known him…Cons-Merlin. I mean, Merlin…he left me unsettled with his identity and perhaps I acted more rashly than I should have in my surprise. But…" the warrior at her side hesitated, gazing down at Gwen's dark hand before he was swiping his thumb across the back of it. The callouses on his thumb made this shiver Gwen had never felt before, but wasn't rejecting, roll down her spine as her face grew heated. "I will listen to him. He's not the boy of legends as you said, like I was trying to make him out to be. He is…just a boy. A special boy I can see is prone to making mistakes. I think that I would very much like to see who he is…without the blinders I have been wearing before I had met him."

Gwen almost immediately brightened up, her smile turning into something so bright and glowing that it could've stopped a love stricken man's heart…she's hardly able to believe she managed to convince Lancelot to give Merlin a real chance. She had simply been saying things from her heart, things that could have made no sense to Lancelot, but meant everything to her. And he'd been able to understand her and all of her ramblings…she couldn't wait until she is able to see Merlin again. And hear of the conversation that had happened with Lancelot. She had seen how proud Merlin had spoken when he introduced the two of them that day at her house, had seen how much effort and energy that Merlin was putting into Lancelot, saw how happy being around Lancelot made him. She hadn't seen him glowing like that in quite a while…she would've been devastated on Merlin's behalf if Lancelot had decided Merlin wasn't worth him being friends with.

Merlin would always be worth it.

And more people needed to see that.

"Oh, Lancelot! You have absolutely no idea how happy that makes me! And I'm sure that Merlin is going to be thrilled as well. He doesn't have many friends in the kingdom. Just me, and Morgana, and Gaius of course but I'm not sure if he counts considering he's his uncle. He needs more people his age around him, people to keep him grounded and help him for a change, because he's known for nearly killing himself to help others. And I know how much he values having you around. I'm sure he's absolutely ripped apart right now after you found out like you did. I blame Arthur, of course. He always wants to do something that'll hurt Merlin." Gwen ranted and raved, her excitement fueling her as she sat just a bit straighter on her crate, her mouth getting away from her as she rambled in a way she hadn't done since before her imprisonment. "He's the real reason Merlin keeps his distance from people when he can…Merlin's not the type that is meant to be alone. He thrives being around people, but most people take to avoiding him nowadays. It was when Merlin drunk the poison to save Arthur, is that one of the stories you've heard? I'm sure it's among the many being said, but you should have seen how horrible it was before then. People cursing him out in the halls, the servant quarters were an absolute nightmare and I'm just so grateful Merlin didn't hear a majority of what they were saying. I honestly don't even know if that's truly how they felt, or if they simply thought that it's what Arthur wanted them to say. He 'had' hit Merlin in the streets earlier that day, and I suppose many thought they needed to hate Merlin as well-"

Gwen hadn't realized what she had just said, Merlin's tragic tale spilling from her lips being only one fact among the many she was spewing. But she knew she had said something wrong, when Lancelot's grip around her hand became suddenly unbearably tight. So tight, that it immediately made her go quiet, her eyes shooting back down to meet with Lancelot…dark and fearsome and not at all like the gentle boy she had confessed her feelings too. What had she done wrong…why did Lancelot look as if he suddenly had murderous intentions…she got hit with the truth moments later. Her last sentences repeating themselves in the back of her mind…Gwen wasn't sure if she should be pleased because of Lancelot's intense reaction, Merlin deserved more people who truly looked after his best interest after all. Or terrified she might have started something she didn't know how to finish.

"Arthur did what?"

X

Lancelot NaLastName, had pretty much already figured he was going to end up forgiving Merlin for his deceit. Unless of course, Merlin said something he found truly appalling the next time they met, like how he had lied to Lancelot because he thought it was fun to string him along and make him follow along with this insane plan of his. But having heard what Guinevere had just said…it became clear to him that he would forgive Merlin without a doubt. Maybe that was because Lancelot felt pity for the consort. Out of all the things Lancelot could've learned about the consort he admired, about the boy that helped him without asking for anything in return…he never could've known that he would discover an abusive relationship.

Nobody deserved to be hit.

No matter the circumstances.

Especially not a boy as small as Merlin was…

This was, perhaps, the very reason why Lancelot had wanted to become one of the knights in the first place. He didn't want to be somebody who stood on the sidelines and watched somebody else asking for help, and doing nothing to ease what ailed them. He was meant to stop people from hurting others, to stop tyranny no matter where he found it, he could feel that fact as strongly as he could feel the blood moving faster inside his veins…Lancelot could very well see Merlin in his mind's eye. Not a glorified Merlin meant to be Consort, but a Merlin trapped in a cycle of abuse that was unescapable. Lancelot gritted down his teeth sharply, he remembered the way Arthur had approached Merlin on the training field. How Lancelot himself had to step in because he thought Merlin hadn't wanted to go with him…perhaps it was more than just the lover's spat Lancelot had decided it was. And to know he had gone and left Merlin there…Merlin who probably needed help getting away from his abuser…and Lancelot had allowed his own upset to blind him to the truth. He was sure the signs of abuse were there, he just hadn't bothered to see it for himself until it was spelt out right in front of him.

Merlin may have been able to hold his own against Bryon and Julian, but how could Merlin hold himself against a brute like Arthur?

Merlin may have the determination to fight when his life was threatened, but how is he meant to fight somebody he's tied to for life?

Merlin may be the Consort, but that meant nothing when he was allowed to be beaten in the streets…

Protector of the people, Guinevere had called him, and Lancelot had failed the 'true' protector of the people. He felt utterly disgusted with himself, sick to his very core…

"LANCELOT!"

Lancelot's head snapped up with enough force that he felt his neck cracking, and there he was. Arthur fucking Pendragon, storming his way down the street as if hell was lapping at his ankles. And for a second, just a second, Lancelot's sure he heard the cracking of thunder roaring somewhere in his eardrums…the warrior rose to his feet. Hand already flying out to grab the handle of a broom, his only weapon, that had been situated against the stables. He didn't know if he was going to try to kill the prince, or if he just wanted to beat him like he'd beaten Merlin. He just knew he had to do something to protect the sweet and kind Merlin from EVER being trapped beneath this man's power.

And if this meant Lancelot was never going to become a knight of Camelot…

Then so be it.