"Haaeh." Santana lets out an incoherent noise that sounds like a whine. She sees in Mrs. Pierce's eyes the same look that had been in Brittany's eyes when she got mad at Puck. How in the world did Puck survive those cold blue eyes staring at him, tearing him apart?

"Well? Are you going to answer me or just stand there like a mute?!"

"I-I...uh. I'm—" she stutters. Taking a second to gather herself, she opens her mouth again, still unsure of what exactly she'll say.

Suddenly, the older blonde cracks a smile—or, rather, a smirk—then bursts into laughter. "Holy crap, you should've seen your face!" she chokes out, laughing like a hyena. "That was priceless!"

Santana's jaw drops, while Brittany shakes her head in disapproval but can't keep the corners of her lips down, giving away her amusement.

"Good one, Mommy!" Tommy giggles, reentering the room. They give each other a double high-five.

"Now, remember what I said about repeating certain words that you might hear Mommy and Britty say?" Mrs. Pierce asks him.

"I know which words are bad, Mommy. I promise I won't say them until I'm 16."

"That's right, baby boy, that's right," she grins, poking his nose so he giggles. She then turns to the couple and simply says, "Ready for dinner?" before taking Tommy's hand and walking to the dining room.

"What the fuck," Santana exhales after a few seconds. "I think I just sweated off 10 pounds."

"Hot," Brittany deadpans.

Santana glares. "Not helping. That was fucking scary! I thought she was completely serious!" She wraps her arms around Brittany's waist and lays her head on her chest. "I thought she was going to make us break up."

"Hey, I told you that wouldn't happen." Brittany soothingly runs her fingers through dark, raven hair.

"I know, but I'm just scared it will. You know if my parents find out..." she trails off, not wanting to continue.

Brittany gently cups her face. "I'm not going to let that happen, Santana. I promise. I will always fight for you."

Searching her face, Santana can't help but see the sincerity there and feel an overwhelming sense of comfort.

They share a sweet kiss before Brittany pulls back. "Come on, let's go before my mom comes back here looking for us."

When they enter the dining room, they find that the two have started eating without them, a good portion of their food already gone.

"About time you got here. Now, come on and dig in. I want all the details—appropriate ones, of course," Mrs. Pierce adds, glancing at Tommy. "It's not every day Brittany brings home a gorgeous woman." Santana immediately feels herself blush at the words.

"Mom, T, I'd like to formally introduce Santana Lopez, my girlfriend."

"Well dang!" Mrs. Pierce exclaims. "You've tamed my baby girl? Wait, you two aren't in an open relationship or anything, right? If so, Santana honey, you could do so much better."

"Mom!" Brittany protests. Sometimes, she just can't believe her mother.

"No, no, ma'am, nothing like that," Santana quickly clarifies. "Brittany and I are exclusive, and I really, really like her, and—"

"Hold up. First of all, if you're dating Britt, I don't want any of this 'ma'am' business. That may work on your parents' stuck-up friends, but not on me. Call me Susan."

"Uh, okay. Susan," Santana says, trying out the name. She knows her parents are infamous in town, but it's still a little weird when strangers know who they are.

"Good. Now that that's settled, I just want to let you know that you two look completely perfect for each other. And Santana, you must be something if Brittany's willing to keep you around. You know, my baby was always a 'hit it and quit it' type of girl." She winks.

Huffing out an exasperated sigh, Brittany gives up on trying to stop her mom and simply rolls her eyes and crosses her arms.

"I've only ever had two rules for her when it comes to the horizontal tango," Mrs. Pierce continues, and Brittany feels like banging her head against the wall. "One: don't get an STD, and two: don't get pregnant."

The rest of dinner continues in about the same way. Brittany and Santana tell Susan their whole story, starting with the fake dating part and ending with the present (omitting some need-to-know parts). The brunette finds that she actually really likes Brittany's mom. Sure, she's a little out there, but she is everything that Santana's mother isn't. Given that Santana hates everything that her mother is, how can she not like Susan? Plus, Tommy is the most adorable thing ever. Unable to believe that she was scared of him when they first met, Santana becomes more and more comfortable as dinner goes by.

For Brittany's part, she is ecstatic that her family and girlfriend are getting along. She'll definitely have to scold her mom later about her behavior, but all in all, it is definitely a successful night.

The entire Pierce family is sad when Santana gets ready to leave. "Are you sure you have to go now?" Brittany asks, pouting.

"Yeah. I don't want to, but I have to. You know my parents. Thank you for dinner, Susan. It was delicious, and I'm glad I got to meet you."

"Pleasure was mine, sweetie."

Santana is surprised when the older woman wraps her in her arms, and again when she feels something cling to her leg.

"Bye Tana! Come back soon!" Tommy says when they both release her.

"I'll walk you to the door, San." Brittany steps onto the patio with her to say goodbye. "I had a really great time tonight. Even though my family is a little weird."

"I did too. And are you kidding me? They're awesome."

"Yeah, I guess they are." Brittany smiles before pouting again. "I'm gonna miss you."

"I'll miss you too. But I wanted to ask you something." Brittany's curiousity is immediately piqued. "Umm, what do you say to going on a date tomorrow? With me?" Santana asks, almost in a whisper because of how nervous she is.

"Yes! Yes, of course, San!" Brittany agrees excitedly.

"I've been meaning to ask you for awhile, but I always chickened out. Plus, this timing is good, because my parents will be out of town until Friday."

Suddenly, Brittany leans in really close, and Santana's breath hitches. "Are you saying we'll have a big, empty house all to ourselves?" the blonde breathes, grabbing the brunette's hips and pulling them towards her own.

Santana bites a plump bottom lip and nods. "Uh-huh," she half-moans when Brittany starts to nibble at her ear.

"Well then, I can't fucking wait."


"So you seem to really like this Santana girl," Brittany's mom comments as they clean up in the kitchen together.

"Yeah. I really do."

"Well, I like her. She seems nice, and she looks at you like you're the only person in the world that matters."

The younger girl smiles at that. "Mom, I...I think I might be in love with her." She feels like a weight is lifted off her chest as soon as she finally says it out loud.

"I know," Mrs. Pierce immediately replies. Brittany freezes, surprised by her answer. "Oh honey, don't look so surprised. You give her that look too, you know? And I don't think you've ever brought anyone home or introduced me to anyone before."

"I've just never met anyone like her. I don't want to screw it up by saying 'I love you' too soon."

There is a short pause. "Want some advice?"

"From you? I don't know," Brittany jokes.

"Oh, shut up!" Mrs. Pierce says, punching her daughter's arm.

"Yeah, Mom, sure. Some advice would be great."

"She loves you too. I know it. You should tell her before you miss the chance. Don't make her wait."

Brittany pauses to think. Does Santana really love her back? It would be amazing if she did. "Thanks Mom. I'm going to go to bed." She needs to think some more.

"Alright Britt. Night."

As Brittany ascends the stairs, she hears her mom scream, "Oh, by the way, you have a bigass hickey on your neck!"


"What the fuck?" Brittany says out loud. Santana is standing at her opened locker with white roses all over the floor around her. The blonde immediately storms over. "Puck," she growls. It isn't a question; she knows who is responsible for this.

Santana hands her a note. "Technically, it's from a secret admirer, but based on the crap handwriting and the cheese, I'd guess it's from Puck." Equally as annoyed as Brittany, Santana can't believe that loser actually has the nerve to try to get her back.

"'You're so hot you're making me melt'?" Brittany seethes as she reads the note. "Could he get any cheesier? And what the hell is with these white roses? I'm going to fucking kill him!"

"B, calm down. He's completely harmless, and I'm yours. I'll tell him to stop."

"I don't want you anywhere near him!"

"Well then, what do you want me to do?"

"I want you to stand here and wait while I take care of him!" Brittany turns to walk away, but Santana grabs her arm and pulls her back.

"Brittany," she says in a softer tone, and the blonde visibly relaxes.

"I'm sorry. The guy just gets on my fucking nerves."

"I know. But I'll take care of him."

"But—"

"If you're really worried, I'll bring Quinn with me when I talk to him, okay?"

Brittany looks at her, conflicted. "Fine. On one condition though."

"What?"

The blonde leans in to whisper in her ear, "Meet me in the bathroom next to the Home Ec room in 20 minutes."

Santana's thighs clench at the proposition, but before she can reply, her girlfriend is sauntering away.


Santana stares at the clock desperately, as she has been for the past 15 minutes. She is sitting in her Statistics class tapping her foot, impatient and aroused, when Rachel Berry comes up to her. "I heard what happened today in the hallway."

Santana ignores her. Just three more minutes.

"It was all over JBI's website. I'm sorry this is happening. Although it's not my fault, I can't help but feel guilty that—"

"Berry," Santana says shortly without even looking at her. "Just shut up and go back to your seat." She adds a sickeningly sweet "please," making Rachel tremble on the spot. Then, finally glancing at her, she continues, "Also, that scarf looks like a lesbian number Jill knitted with sticks she found in the woods." She doesn't feel guilty at all for being harsh, not when all she can think about is the fact that she's (hopefully) going to fuck Brittany in about one minute.

Rachel walks back to her seat in defeat but continues to watch Santana as she bolts up from her chair and leaves the room without even informing the teacher.

"Britt?" Santana calls into the bathroom. When she gets no reply, she checks each stall, but they are all empty. Before she can panic, however, she hears the door slam shut behind her. She whips around to see Brittany standing there, looking at her hungrily. "I thought you bailed on me," Santana admits.

Brittany grabs her hand and pulls, pressing her up against the door and mashing their lips together. It takes Santana a second to reciprocate, but when she does, she does so eagerly. Their tongues thrust against each other for a second before the blonde pulls away. "And miss this? Fuck no," she replies before going back in for more.

Santana loves the feeling of being surrounded by Brittany: her scent, her lips, her hands. Those warm lips leave hers again, this time traveling down her jaw frantically to kiss and bite her neck. The Latina pants as teeth bite and suck at her soft flesh. She knows that the blonde is leaving marks, and she's about to say something, but Brittany's hand quickly flips her skirt out of the way, distracting her. "Britt," she gasps. The blonde pulls her spanks aside just so there is enough room for her hand. Not even bothering with Santana's thong, Brittany quickly thrusts into her with two fingers. "Oh fuck," Santana moans. Brittany goes at it with abandon, pumping deep and fast.

Santana can't think straight, the delicious feeling Brittany is giving her overpowering everything. She's so slick and wet, and the blonde isn't slowing down. In fact, she is doing the exact opposite. Santana has no choice but to just go along with the fact that she is getting fucked against a bathroom door during school and roll her hips frantically into Brittany's long fingers.

Then, Brittany's thumb rubs against her clit, and she knows she's a goner. "Britt! Britt, fuck, I'm—" She lets out a strangled cry and grips tightly at the blonde's waist as she rides out her orgasm.

Brittany's fingers continue to thrust, and her thumb gently massages Santana's clit, helping her come down.

"What...was that?" Santana pants, barely able to stand up straight. She has never come so fast and so hard in her life.

Brittany simply kisses her on the forehead, then says, "Just reminding you who you belong to." After opening the door, she turns around and smirks. "I'll see you later, babe. Oh, and you've got a little something right here." She points to her neck.

The door closes, leaving Santana alone once again. Still in a daze, she fixes her spanks and skirt, then stumbles to the sink, clutching it as she tries to keep her breathing steady and get ahold of herself. "You're going to be the death of me, Brittany Pierce," she whispers to herself, but she can't help but laugh lightly.

After Santana washes her face with cool water, she gasps at her reflection in the mirror. Her neck is completely covered with angry red bites. A few are already deep purple.

"Fuck," she curses at the tender marks. While she's pissed that Brittany left them knowing they're going to show, she also can't help finding the whole thing really hot. It's undeniable physical evidence that she has been claimed.

However, she doesn't want people—especially Puck—asking who attacked her neck. What the hell is she going to do?


"Santana, I hope you are aware that it is extremely rude to insult someone, and then expect them to help you when you see fit," Blabbermouth Berry lectures her.

Valiantly trying to hold back her vicious words, Santana just stands awkwardly in the bathroom, trying to cover her neck with her hands.

"Also, you can't just command people to go inside classrooms, disrupt class, and take people away from said rooms to help you solve your problems."

"I don't fucking care, Berry! Just give me your stupid moose scarf!"

"That's why I'm here?! You want my scarf?" Rachel exclaims, clutching onto it dramatically.

"Yes, Berry. Are you deaf?"

"First of all, you shouldn't speak that way to someone whose help you need, and second of all, it's an elk, not a moose. It was also hand-knitted, so there's no way I'm letting you—holy Barbra Streisand, what happened to your neck?!" Rachel gasps. Santana had tried to grab the girl, leaving her neck uncovered while doing so.

"Fuck!" She tries to cover it up again, but it's too late. Sighing and admitting defeat, she lets her arms fall down to her sides.

"It looks like you got mauled by a hungry animal!"

Close, Santana thinks, and she can't help but smirk.

"Oh my god, did Brittany do that?"

"Wow, Rachey, you catch on fast! Yes, she did. Now give me your scarf so I don't have to explain that to people."

Hesitantly, Rachel concedes, removes the wool garment, and hands it to Santana.

"Thank you. Now please be on your way." The cheerleader ties it around her neck with a scowl, then makes her way out of the bathroom.

"Please don't damage it, Santana! It's very special to me."

"Yeah, yeah."


Brittany smirks as she waits for Santana. She's talking to Quinn when the girl finally enters their Drama classroom, and she snorts, trying to suppress her laughter.

"What the hell are you wearing?" Quinn asks, a smile plastered on her face.

"Shut up," Santana replies halfheartedly, tired of the weird looks people have been shooting her and glares she's been giving all day.

"Is that Rachel's?" Brittany chuckles.

"It's your fault I have to wear this God-awful thing," Santana mumbles.

"Why Santana, I have no idea what you mean." Brittany gives her a wide-eyed, innocent look before smirking. "Besides, you like being marked by me."

"Britt," she hisses, despite the blush creeping up her face.

"Relax, San. Everyone's too invested in themselves to pay attention to us."

Santana just grumbles some more.

"What are you trying to hide, S?" Quinn asks, although she thinks she has a pretty good idea. She tugs at the scarf, but Santana slaps her hand away.

"Just my sexy love bites." Brittany shrugs casually.

The brunette sinks down in her seat as her face gets even redder.

"Everyone, please break into groups of two, and practice portraying different emotions!" Ms. Holliday commands.

"Hi guys. Want to be my partner, Quinn?" Sam strolls over and asks.

"Of course, Sam. I'd love to."

Quinn and Sam walk away, leaving the couple alone.

Unfortunately, Puck immediately saunters over. "Hey San, you looking for a partner? I'll let you practice with me," he says with a wink.

"No," Brittany states, answering for Santana.

"Back off, Pierce. She's not your girl anymore."

Brittany glares at him as her jaw and fists clench. She wants so badly to tell him how wrong he is.

Santana speaks up. "Well, I'm definitely not yours, Puckerman. Brittany's my partner."

Puck tenses. "Fine, next time then."

"No, I don't think so," Santana deadpans.

"Whatever," he grumbles before stalking off.

"Oh, and stop leaving flowers and cheesy notes in my locker!" Santana yells after him.

Ignoring her, Puck goes to sit by Rachel, who glances at him, then walks away, slightly confused.

Turning to her girlfriend, Brittany says softly, "I'm really glad you stood up to him."

"Of course, B. I'm your girl, remember?"

"Yeah you are. And if you ever forget, you can just take off that ridiculous scarf." Brittany grins.

"Ughh!" Santana moans, burying her face in her hands just as Ms. Holliday walks by.

"Wow Santana, that's a really good 'embarrassed'! Keep up the good work!"


"I'll see you in Glee?" Brittany asks before they part.

"Yup." Santana desperately wants to kiss her but knows she can't, so she settles for a lame wave before walking to her locker.

She would never admit this out loud, but she's actually kind of excited for Glee Club. Sure, she'd had to give Sue some bullshit excuse, and people might think she's crazy, but the idea of singing and dancing seems like it could be fun. While she likes cheering, she only joined because her parents told her to. Glee is the first thing she will do for herself...and for Brittany, but that's just a bonus.

"Hey Fabray, why are you following me?" Santana asks, noticing the blonde a couple steps behind her.

"Well, I wanted to see how you were doing with this whole Glee thing," she replies.

"And?"

"That's it."

"No, there's something else on your mind."

"No, there's n—"

"Quinn, we've known each other forever. You really think I can't read you? Now stop being stubborn and tell me."

"Well, Sam kind of asked me to join Glee."

"What?! What'd you say?"

"Well, I said yes. I thought it'd be cool if you, Britt, and I were on the same team for once."

"Yeah, I guess it could be pretty cool," Santana says like she doesn't care, even though she's secretly relieved that she won't be joining alone and that her best friend will be by her side.

"Hey! Did you tell her?" Sam asks excitedly as he and Rachel walk up to them. The two of them had agreed that they will introduce Santana and Quinn to the club.

"Yeah, Guppy, she did. Now let's get this over with."

The four of them walk down the almost empty halls until they finally reach the choir room.

"Ready?" Quinn whispers.

"As I'll ever be."