Naomi

The RV bumped along the road, throwing us all around inside it. I didn't mind much. The seats were comfortable enough, and there was something about being crammed in there with Daryl and his friends that made me feel like I was part of something. I hadn't felt that way for a while, maybe not since I'd lost most of my group at Terminus.

"What you smiling at?" Daryl asked me like it was some kind of crime to be smiling on the way to a negotiation with a potentially hostile new community.

"Didn't think you'd let me come," I said.

"Wasn't aware I had a choice," he said in a way that suggested that if he'd known he had any say in the matter, my ass would be sat at home right now.

"That's fair," I said. "You didn't."

He wanted to smile, too, I could tell. I caught his eye, but he looked away, out of the window. The RV came to a sudden stop. Wheels spun against nothing, churning up chunks of wet mud.

"Damn it," Rick said from the driver's seat. "A storm must've passed through. We're stuck."

Jesus sprang up from his seat and looked ahead of where the RV had stopped.

"No worries," he said. "We're here."

Aside from breaking out and waking up Rick and Michonne while they were sleeping, outing their relationship to anyone who didn't know, Jesus had been a pretty well-behaved prisoner. We'd saved a few of his people on the journey up here, and, despite our concerns that it might have been some kind of trap or ambush, everything had worked out fine. Now though, this new obstacle seemed suspiciously well-placed. What were the chances of us getting stuck in mud right outside his community? Felt more likely that they might have laid this as a trap.

I jumped down from the RV, felt the wet mud splash around my feet. It looked innocent, like it genuinely could've been caused by heavy rainfall. Not too far ahead of us, the road we'd been following led up to a wooden gate and a wall so high that it was impossible to see what lay beyond it.

"That's us," Jesus said. "That's the Hilltop."

He started walking towards it, the spring in his step of someone who was returning home after what had probably been a very long night. The rest of his people walked forward, too, relieved to be making it back safe. I kept a close eye on all of them. They hadn't caused us any trouble and seemed grateful enough to us for rescuing them, but you couldn't always tell what was an act.

"Stop right there," someone yelled from the gate. I craned my neck to look up. Two lookouts on either side of the gate started down at us with what looked like spears.

"You gonna make us?" Daryl yelled back. I raised my gun to cover him, so they didn't think about trying anything.

"Woah!" Jesus said, raising a hand to try and get us all to calm down.

"Jesus?" one of the lookouts said, finally spotting him. "What the hell is this?"

"Open the gates, Cal. Freddie's hurt," Jesus told him, bringing forward one of the guys we'd rescued on the way here. Jesus looked back at us. "Sorry about these guys. They get antsy standing up there all day doing nothing."

"They give up their weapons, then we'll open the gates," one of the lookouts called back.

"Why don't you come down here and get 'em?" Daryl retorted.

"Look, we vouch for these people, alright," a Doctor we'd saved stepped forward. "They saved us out there."

"Lower the spears," Jesus said.

Rick was getting uneasy. "I'm not taking any chances. Tell your guy Gregory to come out here."

"No. Don't you see what just happened? I'm letting you keep your guns. Look, we ran out of ammo months ago," Jesus said. It could have been a lie. But the bozos on the gates were holding spears and not guns, don't see how they could've planned it that way unless they did this kind of thing a lot. Plus, Jesus hadn't lied yet. Which either meant he was honest, or that he knew the best way to get away with a lie was to surround it with truths. "I like you people. I trust you. Trust us. Open the gates, Cal."

There was a moment where nothing happened, and then the gates in front of us squeaked open. A big, old house stood in front of us. The way probably had for years. There were makeshift wooden camps and a line of trailers. People were hanging out their washing, tending to crops. They had a lot of vegetable plots and old farming equipment. I saw one person feeding chickens. Cows were grazing in a little pen.

"There was a materials company for a power yard nearby. That's how we put the walls up," Jesus said, as we walked in. "A lot of people came from a FEMA camp. Trailers came with them."

"How did people find out about this place?" Michonne asked.

"That's called Barrington House," Jesus said, pointing to the old house in front of us. "The family that owned it gave it to the State in the '30s. Then it was turned into a living history museum. Every elementary school for 50 miles used to come here for field trips. The place was running a long time before the modern world built up around it. I think people came here because they figured it'd keep running after the modern world broke down. Those windows up there let us see for miles in every direction. It's perfect for security. Come on. I'll show you inside."

He walked us up to the big house. Until now, I'd naively assumed that Jesus was the leader of his own colony. His calming presence and way with people made him likable, even if he was your prisoner. But thinking about it now, it wouldn't have made sense for him to be out on his own to be captured by Rick and Michonne if he was the one in charge of a place.

The door opened on a grand entrance hall, a winding oak staircase led up to the other floors. I was surprised by how intact it all seemed. So used to places being run down and dusty, or at least rearranged to make room for beds. From the entrance, the museum looked like it was still open for business. Portraits hung on the walls, not a speck of dust in sight. I almost felt like we should pay an admission fee.

"Good gracious, Ignatius," Abraham said, looking around the place.

There was a small bookcase. I crouched down to take a look. Heard Daryl tut from behind me. "Can you not?"

"What?" I looked up at him.

"You're a damn magpie for them things," he said. There was a small smile in the corners of his mouth.

"I'm only looking," I grumbled, but I straightened up again because he had a point. We had other things to worry about right now.

"Most of the rooms have been converted to living spaces," Jesus said. "Even the ones that weren't bedrooms before."

"People live here and the trailers?" Rick asked.

"We plan to build," Jesus said. "Babies are being born."

One of the big wooden doors opened, an older man in a grey suit stepped out and looked around at us all. "Jesus," he said. "You're back… with guests."

He didn't look best pleased about it, although he tried to hide it with a smile. I could feel Daryl pacing around behind me, the way he did when he's uncomfortable in a place.

"Everyone, this is Gregory," Jesus said. "He keeps the trains running on time around here."

"I'm the boss," he said, with a glint in his eye.

"Well, I'm Rick," Rick tried to introduce himself. "We have a community-"

"Why don't y'all go get cleaned up, hmm?" Gregory interrupted him.

"We're fine," Rick tried to politely decline, although Gregory clearly disagreed.

"Jesus will show you where you can get washed up. Then come back down here when you're ready," he said. He stepped closer to Rick. "It's hard to keep this place clean."

I looked down at myself. Felt like there was a base level of mud and grime that just kinda stuck to me these days. But we had needed to clear some Walkers to save Jesus's people, so there was blood on me now too. Felt a bit rude of Gregory to make us clean up after we'd brought those people back safe and sound.

"Yeah," Rick said, eventually. "Sure."

"Follow me," Jesus said with a slightly apologetic smile. He showed us where the bathrooms were, and we split off into groups. Nobody spoke much, still trying to suss this place out, but it was agreed that Maggie would be the one to talk to Gregory. Since Deanna's death, Maggie was slowly stepping into her shoes.

I went in after her, washed as much of the grime off myself as I could, and then walked back out into the landing to wait for everyone else. Jesus was waiting there too.

"You got many kids here?" I asked him.

"A few," he said. "But not your sister."

He smiled at the shock on my face. For the briefest of seconds, I would've believed that this Jesus had the same kind of powers as the original. "How did you…?"

"He already asked," Jesus nodded through an open door, to where Daryl was standing by the window watching us talk. He gave me a little smile.

"Oh," I said. Maybe it was because I'd been expecting it, or maybe it was the comfort of having Daryl care enough to ask for me, but it didn't sting as much as it had to find out she wasn't in the Kingdom. "Thanks anyway."

"No problem," Jesus put a hand on my shoulder, gave it a squeeze. When he let go, I walked into the room that Daryl was in. I wanted to say something to him, but Abraham was sitting there too.

"Maggie talking to Gregory?" I asked. Daryl nodded. He'd stopped pacing so much. I could feel that he was still restless, but that fight or flight battle within him was starting to die down.

I stood by the window with him and looked out into the grounds below. From here, we could see some kids playing out in one of the fields. I couldn't believe he'd asked about Mia before I had. He was the only person in the world who could make losing her less shit. I wanted to say something to thank him for it, but everything felt so corny. And I knew with Abraham sitting there, anything too person would embarrass him. So instead, I said, "Looks like folks got lucky here. Got a whole damn farm."

"Yeah, them chickens would be good," he said.

"Cows too," I pointed. "Fresh milk. Plus, they're kinda cute."

"Cute?" he said, his nose all scrunched up like I'd said something weird. "Them cows?"

"Yeah," I said with a shrug. "I like cows. They got pretty eyes."

He was quiet for a moment. The sunlight through the window hit his already tanned arms.

"Caught some pigs," he said. "Momma and her babies. Back when our group was staying at that prison. They was just out living wild."

"Really?" I said, leaning my forehead up against the glass. I knew it would leave a mark, but the thought of the fit Gregory might have when he spotted it amused me. "How'd you catch 'em?"

"Built a trap," he glanced at me and then back out of the window again. "Did the job, but… weren't as good as one of yours."

"Well, clearly, I taught you well enough," I said, and we smiled at each other.

"How long do you think Rick and Michonne have been ugging bumplies?" Abraham asked abruptly. So abruptly, it made me jump. I'd forgotten he was in the room with us. I turned around to look at him.

"I dunno," Daryl said, more guarded about gossiping about it than he had been with me. I shrugged.

"You ever think about it?" Abraham asked us. My stomach flipped over. Was he really asking us that? He chuckled at my shock, "I mean, settling down?"

Oh. That.

He was talking to both of us, but a short, soft laugh from Daryl made us both look at him. More curious than I cared to admit, I waited to see what he would say. It was hard to imagine him settling with anyone, but he'd been a lot more pro-marriage than I thought he'd be when we'd been talking about Mia's crazy ideas. He said, "You think shit's settled?" which neatly avoided any kind of real answer.

Abraham raised his eyebrows, looked at me. "What about you?"

I mulled it over for a moment, "I think shit's as settled as it's gonna get."

"Y'know," Abraham nodded slowly. "I think you might be about right."

I caught Daryl's eye and realized my answer had been more of a response to his rather than to Abraham's initial question. My palms were weirdly sweaty. I looked back at Abraham. As bleak as it was to think that this was as good as things were gonna get, he didn't look as bummed as I thought he might. He looked like he was mulling something over.

"Maggie and Glenn's baby news got you broody, Abraham?" I asked.

"Got me thinking," he admitted. "That's for sure."

Sasha or Rosita? I wanted to ask but didn't. It looked like he was reaching some kind of decision all on his own.

"It's like Sasha said, right?" I said, trying to gauge his reaction. At the mention of her name, he sat up a little straighter, lifted his eyes from where they'd been staring at the floor. "We got a roof over our heads, we got food, we got walls… we got choices. Maggie and Glenn are choosing to build something. It's brave."

"It sure as shit is brave," he said.

"I think Maggie and Glenn got lucky."

"How'd you figure that?"

"They both found someone they want to build something with," I said. "Easier to be brave when you ain't doing it alone. When you got the right person to be brave with."

"Would you do it?" Abraham asked. "With the right person?"

I hadn't been expecting to be put on the spot like that. I'd been trying to suss out where he stood with Rosita and Sasha, but this conversation had gotten way more intense than I'd expected.

"I ain't given it much thought," I said, honestly. "On one hand, ain't that the point of all this? To build some kind of future? Can't have a future without kids, but… there's more than one way to build a family."

Abraham nodded, looked like he was about to say something else, but then there was a slight cough from where Rick stood in the doorway.

"You guys ready?" he asked. "Rest of us are heading down to wait for Maggie."

Abraham stood up from where he was sitting. Daryl and I walked away from the window. We followed Rick back down the stairs to where everyone had gathered outside Gregory's office. We stayed quiet, trying to see if we could hear what was going on, but the door was too thick.

Eventually, Maggie burst out of there. It was apparent from the look on her face that things hadn't gone well.

"Slimy old creep won't give us anything," she muttered. She looked at Rick, "I tried."

"You tell him we got weapons?" he asked. "Ammo?"

"Told him all that."

Even the air seemed to bristle as we looked at Jesus's. We hadn't come all this way, and rescued four of his friends in the process, just to leave with nothing but less gas in the RV than when we'd arrived.

"We want to generate tread. Gregory does," Jesus insisted. "But ammo isn't something we urgently need."

"How's that?" Rick asked. Living in a world without ammunition felt as impossible as it did stupid.

"The walls hold. We just brought in more medicine. Gregory wants the best deal possible."

"Yeah, well, we want things, too," Daryl said.

"We need food. We came all this way, we're gonna get it," Rick agreed.

"I will talk to him, and we will work this out," Jesus said, in his usual calm and measured way. "Circumstances change. We're doing well now, and you will next. I will make him understand that. Can you give me time?

"We can," Michonne said, and Rick agreed. Jesus looked relieved, and in the silence, he tried to calculate his next move. He didn't have long before the doors burst open, and one of the guards from the gate came rushing in.

Hearing the commotion, Gregory came out of his office, "What's wrong?"

"They're back," he said. Whatever that meant was enough for Jesus and Gregory to leave without offering any of us further explanation. We followed them back out of the house and into the grounds where three people were walking in. Two guys and a girl. All of them looked like they'd been through some shit. They were clean enough, but their faces were pale and haunted.

"Nathan, what happened to everybody else?" Gregory asked. "Where's Tim and Marsha?"

"They're dead," one of the guys said. He was the bigger of the two and had a long-ass beard.

"Negan?" Gregory said.

Negan.

That name again. That phantom. I looked at Daryl, knew he'd clocked it too.

"Yeah," Nathan said.

"We had a deal," Gregory lamented.

"He said it wasn't enough." There was something dangerous in Nathan's eyes when he looked back at Gregory. "Was the drop light?"

"No," Gregory insisted. Nobody looked like they trusted him to be telling the truth.

"They still have Craig," the woman told him.

"They said they'd keep him alive," Nathan said. "Return him to us, if I deliver a message to you."

It was a mark of Gregory's inexperience and naivety that on hearing this, he did not arm himself. He stepped forward and said, "So tell me."

"I'm sorry," Nathan said before he stabbed him in the gut. Gregory cried out. There were audible gasps from the people of the Hilltop, unused to violence like this. Rick and Michonne sprang forward, pulling the guy away from Gregory. We had a vested interest in keeping him alive. I ran to where Gregory was writhing on the ground in pain.

"It's agony," he reached towards me. His hand shaking like a damn leaf in the breeze.

I looked up at Glenn. "Go and get that Doctor."

"On it," he said and sprang to his feet, running towards the medical trailer.

"Let me take a look," I said. Gregory moved his hand, and I saw the blood pooling on his shirt. It was a lot, but not a life-threatening amount. I took off his suit jacket and bundled it up, pressing down hard on the wound. "You'll be fine, it ain't that deep. Don't think it's cut anything major."

"My jacket…" he said forlornly. "It'll stain."

"You can bill me for the dry-cleaning," I muttered, while Maggie rolled her eyes behind his back.

"You killed him!" I heard someone scream. Keeping pressure on Gregory's wound, I looked back around and saw the fight was over. Nathan lay dead on the ground. The woman he'd come back with was sobbing over him, and the other guy was lying face down but alive after coming facing off against both Daryl and Abraham. Unlucky guy.

"Everyone, this is over! It's over," Jesus said, standing between Rick's gun and angry Hilltop residents. "Nathan was our friend, but let's not pretend he was anything more than a coward who attacked us. He did this. And these people stopped him."

"What can I do?" Rick asked him.

"Put the gun away, you've done enough," Jesus said. "You need to know that things aren't as simple as they might seem. Just give me some time."

Glenn arrived back with Doctor Carson, and I helped them carry Gregory back into the house. We took him into one of the bedrooms, where he lay and complained about the pain he was in while Doctor Carson stitched him up. I stayed and mopped up the blood while he worked. Then he sent us both away and called for Jesus like he was a man on his death bed.

I found the rest of my group waiting in his study.

"How's Gregory?" Maggie asked when I walked in.

"Well enough to be a pain in the ass," I told her.

"Think he'll give us anything now?" Glenn asked.

"Saved his ass, didn't we?" Daryl said.

"We also killed one of them," Rick pointed out.

"Gregory seems more concerned about saving his own skin than avenging anyone else's," Maggie said.

"True," Rick agreed. "But how's it going to look to his people if we come in here, kill one of them and leave with their food?"

His question hung in the air for a moment, and then Jesus came back into the room.

"Doctor Carson was able to patch Gregory up," he said. "He's in pain, but he'll live."

"He's well enough to worry about his damn suit jacket," I grumbled.

"So, what happens now?" Glenn asked.

"Things like that don't usually happen here, but, uh, it's settled," Jesus said.

"We heard the name Negan," Rick said. "A while back, Daryl, Naomi, and Abraham had a run-in with his men. Who is he?"

"Negan's the head of a group of people he calls the Saviors," Jesus said. "As soon as the walls were built, the Saviours showed up. They met with Gregory on behalf of their boss. They made a lot of demands, even more threats, and he killed one of us - Rory. He was 16 years old. They beat him to death right in front of us. Said we need to understand right off the bat. Gregory's not exactly good at confrontation. He's not the leader I would have chosen, but he helped make this place what it is, and the people like him."

"He made the deal?" Maggie asked.

"Half of everything. Our supplies, our crops, our livestock, it goes to the Saviours."

"And what do you get in return?" Glenn asked.

"They don't attack this place. They don't kill us," Jesus said.

"Pretty lousy deal," I said. Ours had been way better. But I guess if Gregory was already handing over half of everything to those assholes, Maggie's price might have been too steep.

"Why not just kill them?" Daryl asked.

"Most of the people here don't even know how to fight, even if we had ammo," Jesus said. That had been pretty obvious from their reaction to everything that had gone down outside.

"Well, how many people does Negan have?" Rick asked.

"We don't know. We've seen groups as big as 20."

"Now, hold up," Daryl said. "So, they show up, they kill a kid, and you give them half of everything? These dicks just got a good story. The boogeyman, he ain't shit."

"Well, how do you know?" Jesus asked.

"A month ago, we took his guys out PDQ," Abraham said. "Left them in pieces and puddles."

"You know, we'll do it," Daryl said. "If we go get your man back, kill Negan, take out his boys, will you hook us up? We want food, medicine, and one of them cows."

He sounded so sure, so confident. There was a fire in his eyes. I hadn't seen him like that for a while. I was proud of him for speaking up but uneasy about how quick he was to put himself forward for confrontation. Everyone else seemed in agreement, I wondered if this was something they'd all talked about while I was out of the room helping Gregory.

"Confrontation's never been something we've had trouble with," Rick said. I felt uneasy about it, but I knew we had to present a united front in this negotiation, so I held my tongue.

"I'll take it to Gregory," Jesus said.

Gregory agreed to talk, but only to Maggie. She was in there for a lot less time than she had been the first time around, and this time when she emerged, we had a deal. Half of their food if we got their man Craig back and took out Negan and the Saviours. The deal was done before I could voice my concerns or suggest an alternative.

Rick spoke to one of the guys who dropped things off at the Savior's base and convinced him to come with us, talk us through the lay of the land. It would help to have a face the Saviors knew to persuade them to open the door to us. Jesus offered to come too.

We loaded shit into the RV. More fresh food than we'd seen in a while. Seeds to grow crops for ourselves too. Maggie and Glenn were missing from it all. When it was time to go, they came out of Doctor Carson's office with these huge smiles on their faces. Sitting down in the back of the RV, they took out a scan of their kid and showed it to Michonne. Her smile was almost as big as theirs. She hesitated, and then passed it across to Daryl.

He took it from her, and I watched his face as he looked at it. The little smile. The way his eyes softened. Something about it made my heart ache. Much as he might avoid the subject, family was all Daryl wanted. All he looked for in the people he let get close enough to him. He deserved a good one. One he chose, one that deserved someone like him. If he ever stopped fighting long enough to look for one… I hoped he'd find it. I was so lost in thought that I didn't expect him to turn and show it to me. The unexpected way his eyes met mine made my heart drop like he'd somehow be able to read when I was thinking into my face.

"Remember when Mia was this small?" he asked quietly. I know he didn't really want anyone else to overhear, but it was crowded, there was no way to talk without being overheard.

"I was so scared," I said. "Scared for her. Scared of her. Thought she was going to mess everything up."

I'd been so convinced that Mia's arrival would spell the end of my college dreams, and that I would have to give up everything I'd worked for to look after her, that I felt a little guilty about it now she was gone. But I'd gotten through it. Daryl had gotten me through it, he could get me through anything.

"She didn't, though," he said.

"Nah," I agreed. "She made everything so much better."

The scan blurred in front of me, and I blinked a few times. Daryl shifted in the seat beside me, and then I felt his arm across my shoulders, warm and comforting. The smell of him. Like home. I wanted so badly to lean into it, but I was acutely aware of the others around us.

"You okay?" Maggie asked. I couldn't think of anything more terrifying than being pregnant in all of this, but she had this glow about her. I'd always heard that pregnant women get it, but I hadn't seen it on my Momma. Maybe it only comes when it's a kid they really want. My opinion of my Momma might have been too clouded for me to see it on her. Whatever it was, Maggie looked happy. Glenn had it too.

"Yeah," I said, and I was. I really was. I handed the scan to Abraham and looked back at them both. "I'm just real excited to meet your kid."

"Yeah?" Glenn smiled and wound a lock of Maggie's hair around his finger as she curled up against him. "Us too."

I thought Daryl would move again, take his arm back, but he didn't. He kept it around me. Deep in thought about something, his fingers absentmindedly traced lines from my shoulder, down my arm and back up again in a way that sent shivers down my spine. Was he thinking about our past with Mia? Or his future? I thought about asking him but found I didn't want to. I didn't want to do anything that might jolt him out of whatever mood he was in. Didn't even want to breathe too hard in case he suddenly remembered where he was and let go of me.

It was easy to imagine him as a dad. I had a harder time picturing him with anyone. I was so used to him being on his own, what would it be like to see him in love with someone? Something new and surprising twisted up in my gut. Sharp and bitter. I didn't like it. I didn't like it at all. Nothing was more important to me than seeing Daryl happy. He was my best friend, my home. But if I was honest - truly honest with myself - there was a chance it was a damn sight more complicated than that.

Daryl

News of what had happened at the Hilltop spread quickly. Unpacking crates of food at Olivia's drew a small crowd. People poured over them, talking about all the shit they could make now that they had fresh food again. Olivia immediately started taking stock of it all. When people asked questions, Rick announced a meeting in the Church. He said a decision like this would need to be democratic, but we'd already taken the Hilltop's food. We'd made our promises to them. Felt like a done deal.

Not everyone came, but enough people gathered to listen to Rick go over the terms of the deal that Maggie had agreed with Gregory. By morning, everyone would know.

"We can work with the Hilltop," Rick told them. "Maggie hammered out a deal. We're getting food - eggs, butter, fresh vegetables. But they're not just giving it away. These Saviours, they almost killed Sasha, Daryl, Naomi, and Abraham on the road. This needs to be a group decision. If anybody objects, here's your chance to say your piece."

Naomi stood up from where she was sitting beside Aaron. Everyone turned to look at her, and I saw her face flush a little, the way it does when she's embarrassed. What the hell was she doing?

"Daryl and I found another place," she said. At the sound of my name, my heart leaped. If she was going to drag me into this, I would've appreciated the head's up. "The Kingdom. We spoke to their leader, and I think they'd be open to trade with us too. Maybe with an easier deal."

Rick was nodding as she spoke, but I knew his mind was already made up, and I think she did, too. "You got any kinda proof of that?"

"No," she said. "But they seemed like good people, seemed interested in our community. They wanted to open up communications with us."

"It's a risk," Rick said. "Could be a trap to learn more about us. But this deal with the Hilltop? It's certain. It's done. We've already got their downpayment of food."

"I know that," Naomi said. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she knew she was defeated. "I think the risk with the Kingdom might be worth it, to avoid this kind of fight."

"I know of the Kingdom," Jesus spoke up. "And they are good people, but they don't have as much to trade as we do."

"Sooner or later, the Saviors would've found us," Rick said. "Just like the Wolves did, just like Jesus did. They woulda killed someone or some of us. And then they would try to own us. And we would try to stop them. But by then we'd be low and food, and in any kind of fight, we could lose. At least here, we keep the element of surprise. You ain't gotta fight if you don't want to. None of you do."

"No," Naomi sat down again. "If this is happening, I wanna fight. I just wanted to put forward an alternative."

"I appreciate that," Rick said. "And I appreciate you fighting with us. We ain't got the time to shop around for other deals. This is the only way to be sure that we win. And we have to win. We do this not just for the Hilltop, it's how we keep this place. It's how we feed this place."

Someone at the back stood up. We all turned to look at Morgan.

"You're sure we can do it?" he said. "We can beat them?"

"What this group has done," Rick looked around at us all. "What we've learned, what we've become, all of us - yes, I'm sure."

I felt a fire in my veins. The camp by the quarry, the prison, Terminus, getting here… it felt like it had all been training for this. And we were ready. We were damn ready.

"Then all we have to do is just tell them that," Morgan said.

"They don't compromise," Rick said.

"This isn't a compromise. It's a choice you give them. It's a way out for them and for us."

"We try and talk to the Saviors, we give up our advantage, our safety," Rick said. "No, we have to come for them before they come for us. We can't leave them alive."

"Where there's life, there's possibility."

"Of them hitting us," Rick said.

"We're not trapped in this. None of you are trapped in this," Morgan looked around at all of us like he was begging us. I glanced at Naomi, hoping she wasn't tempted to stand up again.

"Morgan… they always come back," Rick said.

"Come back when they're dead, too."

"Yeah, we'll stop them. We have before."

"I'm not talking about the Walkers," Morgan said quietly.

"Morgan wants to talk to them first. I think that would be a mistake, but it's not up to me. I'll talk to people still at home. I'll discuss it with the people on guard now, too, but who else wants to approach the Saviours, speak to them first?

Aaron stood up. "What happened here, we won't let that happen again. I won't."

It looked as if he spoke on behalf of the rest of Alexandria. A few nods from the crowds. A few murmurs of agreement.

"Looks like it's settled. We know exactly what this is. We don't shy from it, we live. We kill them all," Rick started to head out of the Church. "We don't all have to kill. But if people are gonna stay here… they do have to accept it."

He walked out, barely looking at Morgan as he went.

I stood up as others started to make their way out of the Church. I looked for Naomi, wanted to know what the hell was up with her going against us like that. She was already heading out with Aaron and Eric. I pushed past a couple of people to get to her before she disappeared.

"Oi, Naomi!" I called. She turned. Smiled. "The hell was that?"

Her smile faltered, "The hell was what?"

"That," I said. "Back there."

"I think the Kingdom could help us," she said like it was that damn simple.

"If you had a problem with the deal we were making, you could've said it at the time," I said.

"No, I couldn't," she said. "I didn't want to undercut Maggie while we were still negotiating."

"So, you just waited to undercut Rick now, huh?" I said. "In front of everyone?"

"Daryl…" Rick's voice from behind me tried to warn me away from a fight I could already feel rising up.

"That wasn't my intention," she said, and then she looked behind me to where Rick was standing watching us fight. "I'm sorry if it came off that way."

"No, I get it," Rick said. "You made a good point. But we ain't got the time to open negotiations with the Kingdom, and Jesus says it might not be the best idea anyway."

"I get that," she said. "And I'm sor-"

Rick held up a hand and cut her off. "Don't worry, Naomi. We're good."

"Okay, thanks, Rick," she said. And just like that, it was over. Both of them were so calm. Rick didn't seem at all mad that she'd gone against our plan. She didn't look at all mad that he'd shot down her idea either. But I was. It took me a moment to realize that it wasn't actually on Rick's behalf. I'd come up with that deal. I'd helped make it. Didn't feel right that she didn't have my back on it. Felt like I'd slip without her there to catch me. She glanced at Aaron and Eric, "Well, we'll see you guys tomorrow, then."

"No," Rick said. "You guys come to ours. Tonight, we're celebrating."

"Celebrating what?" Naomi asked. "We ain't won yet."

"We've got food," Rick said. "Enough for everyone, and the promise of more. That's worth celebrating, don't you think?"

"Well, I am sure as shit ready to blow off some steam," Abraham said, looking around at the rest of us like he was challenging us to some shit. "Even if you goddamn pussies ain't."

Naomi was still hesitating, but I saw the way Eric brightened, "I could whip something up. Make it a little pot-luck dinner?"

"Sounds good to me," Rick nodded. "Head on over when you're ready."

While we waited, we gathered in one of the houses. One of the guys we'd brought with us from the Hilltop talked us through what he'd seen of the Saviors' base. It wasn't much. But we could make some pretty good guesses about where their armory was and decided to head for it the moment we got into the building. Rick was so sure and confident in this plan that there wasn't any room for anyone else to disagree. He was in a good mood. Tense about the upcoming fight. But positive that we were going to win it.

Other people started to arrive. I half-expected Naomi not to come, for Aaron and Eric to visit without her and with some kind of excuse. But when they pitched up, so did she. They brought food, though it was clearly Eric who'd made it, and she sat down at the other end of the table from me, next to Carol and Tobin. Carol had made something too. Tara and Denise brought cake. Everyone who came contributed something. There was beer and wine. More than I was expecting. I felt that slightly hazy buzz you get from being a little tipsy.

People talked and laughed and ate. There was nervous energy about the place. Like it was our last supper. People were giddy with the promise of the upcoming fight. There was a real feeling that any one of us could die tomorrow. But instead of bringing the mood down, it amped everyone one up. Nervous and excited, terrified, all at once.

Without Naomi next to me, I felt like I was watching it from outside a window. Like I could hear it and see it, but it didn't quite reach me. I felt bad for yelling at her. And wanted to talk to her about it, but she sat so far away. I wondered if it was deliberate and if she was mad. When the food was done, people spread out around the house, conversations spilling into other rooms.

Naomi ducked out, sneaking out in a way that I'm sure was only noticeable to me because I was so aware of every movement she made. I waited for her to come back in. When she didn't, I made some excuse and headed out there too. Rick had planned to recap the plan for everyone who'd missed it, and I didn't want her missing out. I wanted her to be as prepared as possible. Thought I might find her out there talking to someone, but she was alone, leaning on the same part of the porch I liked to stand on in the morning. She turned when she heard the door open, looked away again when she saw it was me.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said. "Drank a little too much. Needed some air to clear my head. Didn't know you could see my house from here."

She took a sip from a glass of water she'd been balancing on the porch rail.

"Oh," I pretended that was news to me. "Can ya?"

"Yeah," she said. Her eyes locked on where it was all shut up and dark because she and Aaron and Eric were over here. Something was up. I let the door close behind me and went to stand beside her. She didn't tell me to leave her alone or yell at me, she didn't say anything. It would've been easier if she had. Was she mad at me? She didn't seem mad. But I wasn't used to her being so quiet, she'd been talking my ear off during every silence lately. Most of it was nonsense. But I liked it. I liked it much better than whatever this silence was.

"Sorry," I said after a while. "I shouldn't have yelled at ya."

"It's okay," she said, and it really sounded like she meant it, but she still didn't look at me. "I didn't mean to undermine Rick… or you."

"Me?" I said, and I felt guilty because it must've been obvious why I'd been such an ass. She could almost always figure me out. Even when I didn't want her to.

"Yeah," she said. "You did good with the Hilltop. Food in exchange for protection, it's a good idea… I didn't mean to shit on it back there."

"You didn't," I said. She took a deep breath.

"I just… every fight we go into…" she looked down at the glass in front of her. "I keep thinking it's one where we could lose each other. I don't want that."

"I don't want that either," I said. "But you ain't gotta come."

"Oh, I'm coming," she told me. "Only thing worse than going is staying at home and fretting."

I couldn't argue, I knew that feeling. Was that what was up? Was she nervous about this fight?

"Rick's right about that group in there," I said, as laughter spilled out of the house behind us. "What we have done, what we can do …we're unstoppable. And with you on our team, too… these damn Saviours don't stand a chance."

"I hope you're right," she said.

"I am."

She nodded but didn't say anything else. The chatter and laughter through the door felt miles away. I wondered if I should leave her alone. She didn't ask me to, I didn't want to, either. Something was different. I usually couldn't get her to shut up. Now, I couldn't get her to look at me.

"I don't like it when we ain't on the same team," I told her.

"We're always on the same team," she said, with one of her little half-smiles. "Even if we ain't agreeing."

"Don't feel like it," I muttered. Naomi was standing so close to me but she felt so far away. "I don't wanna argue with you again."

"We ain't arguing," she said. "Just disagreeing. That weren't a fight. Not a real one."

"Guess we ain't had a real fight since…"

My eyes flickered down to that half-moon scar on her hand, it looked silver against her skin in the light from the real moon. Then I looked away again because it kind of hurt to look at. I expected her to cover it up. Hide it from me like she usually did, but she didn't.

"You gotta let that go, man," she said, finally looking at me to follow my gaze with her own. "One tiny slip-up doesn't deserve the amount of shit you've been giving yourself for it."

"It does," I told her. "It just does."

She shook her head.

"I got a lotta scars, Daryl," she said. I thought about the ones on her thighs. The ones she never talked about, and I'd never seen, but still knew were there. She lifted her hand a little. "This one's my favorite."

"Bullshit," I had a lot of scars too. Couldn't imagine calling a single one of them my favorite.

"Nah, it's true," she said. "It always felt lucky. Any time I had a job interview or an exam… anything I felt nervous about, it just made me feel better. Safe."

I watched her run a finger absentmindedly along it.

"Safe?" I repeated. How could some damage I'd caused in a rage make anyone feel safe?

"Yeah," she said. "Because it made me think of you. And you're the only one in the whole world who makes me feel that way. No matter what you did by mistake one time. You know that, right?"

I kind of did. But it was still nice to hear it.

I looked back down at her scar, and it didn't hurt so much to look at anymore. She held out her hand to me, and I took it. Hers on top of mine. We both looked down at where our fingers met and laced together.

"You're a dork," I told her because I had to say something to diffuse this giddy feeling in my chest like I was racing too fast on my bike down a bumpy road.

"Maybe," she half-laughed half-smiled. She put the glass she was holding back down on the railing in front of us and looked at it. I wished she'd look back at me. "You've always been the most important person in my life. Even when you weren't in it."

I wanted to tell her that it was the same for me. That I'd wasted years acting like it was me against the world, but I'd never really been fighting alone. Even when we were apart, she'd been there. Woven in the fabric of who I am. Every decision I'd made, in every good or bad moment, I'd thought of her. Imagined the things she might say to me, the things we'd talk about if we ever met again.

And here she was, holding my hand on a moonlit porch far from where we'd begun.

But it was so hard to put all of that into words. I moved closer, and she turned her head. If she was surprised to find me so close, she didn't show it. Didn't move back. Just looked at me.

"Daryl…" It was a whisper. Quiet as the breeze around us but way more powerful. Damn near knocked me down. Not a question. Just… my name on her lips. Her eyes caught the light, and something changed. She let go of my hand. I waited for her to take a step back, to call me a dumbass or something.

And then she kissed me.

Soft, gentle surprise. The taste of beer and wine and something else. Something sweet and fiery and new. Something so indescribably her. It stirred something deep inside me. A long-suppressed hunger.

Her hand on my chest. Could she feel my heart under her palm? Beating hard. It lurched as she pulled away from me again. Her eyes fluttered open, full and panicked, terrified she'd made a mistake. I reached out and grabbed her hips, pulled her toward me. There would be no damn gap between us. This was no mistake.

A flash of surprise in her eyes, and then I kissed her hard enough to draw a quiet moan from her lips as shock turned to pleasure. The sound of it made my whole body feel alive, so aware of her. The softness of her lips. The taste of her. The smell of her. The way her body molded to mine like it had been made to fit there.

It was like a dam bursting. Everything I'd felt for her up until now was just the start. A fraction of what had been hiding below the surface. I'd locked it away in some kinda cage deep inside me. Ignored it, starved it. Heard it banging against the bars and thought that meant I knew how to control it. But just she'd bust the door wide open, and I was lost to it. Consumed by it. Could she feel it? The animalistic hunger of my lips on hers. Or did she still think this was a mistake?

With one arm wrapped tightly around her, I cupped the side of her face in my free hand and gently pulled away. Her forehead against mine, we stared at each other, breathing hard. Only we existed in the heat between us.

You are mine, I wanted to tell her. Mine.

Could she see it in my eyes? Did it scare as much as it scared me? She didn't look away, didn't move back, didn't tell me to stop. It was like her eyes silently begged me for more. I leaned in to give her what she wanted.

A door opened behind us. Loud and unwelcome noise in this space where only we existed. We broke apart. Light from inside flooded the deck. She squinted into it. "Aaron?"

"Oh good, you're still here!" he said, relieved. "Rick's about to go over the plan for tomorrow. You should probably both… is everything okay?"

I don't know what we must've looked like to him, but it was enough to make him stop talking.

"Yeah," Naomi said, brightly. She smiled at him. I tried to do the same. "Everything's fine. We'll… be right in."

"Alright then," Aaron grinned back at her. He left the door open. She looked at it and then back at me.

"We should probably..." she trailed off, looking back at the open door. There were so many people in there waiting for us. We couldn't stay out here much longer. But walking away from this moment felt wrong.Like leaving it would let it fall apart.

"Yeah," I agreed, trying to sound casual. "We should."

She nodded but didn't move right away.

"Daryl! Naomi!" I heard Rick call. "Get in here!"

Fuck off. I already know your damn plan.

But Naomi and the others didn't. She took a reluctant step towards the house, and I followed, my knees weak from everything that had just happened. It already felt like a dream. But I knew from the way my heart was still racing that it wasn't. Every cell in my body felt electric. Crackling like static every time she got close.

Everything had changed. Everything was different now.

Hard as I tried, I couldn't catch my breath. That caged thing inside of me had been set free, and there was no way of putting it back. It pumped through my veins like adrenaline, powerful and destructive. I'd been an idiot to think I had any kind of control over it at all. The faint taste of her was still on my lips, and deep in my stomach sat a gnawing hunger for more.