Naomi

Cocooned in the warmth of our comforter, I heard the door open as Daryl snuck in. He'd been working late the last few nights, but this was by far the latest he'd come to bed. I'd tried to wait up for him but wound up drifting in and out of sleep. Not long ago, the sound of a door opening while I slept would have thrown me into a wild panic. Hell, footsteps in the hall would have had me reaching for a knife.

But, the longer I'd slept in Daryl's bed, the grip those fears had on me lessened. I was safe here, in this room, in this bed - our room, our bed.

I didn't even feel the paranoid urge to check. I knew it was him. I knew how he sighed as he eased his boots off at the end of the day, the clink of his belt unfastening, the gentle rustle of his clothes hitting the floor. I knew him even in the quiet dark. Something about his presence soothed me right down to my very soul.

The mattress dipped right behind me as he slipped into bed, my skin tingled in anticipation of his warm arm coming to wrap around my waist. I smiled against the pillow, "You're real late tonight."

"Sorry, sweetheart," he murmured. His voice was its own kind of homecoming.

"Don't be," I put my hand over where his arm had finally hugged my middle. "It's nice seein' you like what you're doing so much."

His other hand stroked through my hair, brushing it away from my neck so that he could start kissing it. Rough stubble and warm lips made me shiver.

"Were you sleepin'?" he whispered against my neck between kisses. His hand started to drift lightly across my waist.

"Only a little," I said, not wanting him to stop, but I could hear the sleepiness in my voice.

His fingers stroked up my bare thigh and nudged the shirt I was wearing up a little. He started making light circles against my naked hip. "Is this okay?"

"Mmmhmm." My tired body relaxed even further into his touch. "It's nice."

"Good."

His fingertips continued grazing my skin so lightly it made me shiver. He kissed the spot where my neck met my jawline.

"You have a good day?" I asked him.

"Yeah, it was alright," he said, sounding distracted. His fingers ran through my hair again. "Finished the first batch of fuel tonight."

My eyes shot open. "No way!"

"Mmm-hmm."

"Daryl, that's -" I turned my head, but he caught my lips in a deep kiss before I could finish trying to congratulate him. Heated and hungry, it burned away a little of my sleepiness. I kept trying to talk in the gap between kisses, but I could only get a few words out before his lips silenced them again. "You're so… that's incredible… Daryl, you're… Daryl…Daryl!"

"What?" he finally stopped.

"Can you stop kissing me for a sec so we can talk about this?"

"Nope." He kissed me again to prove it.

"But-" I started to say before I was muffled by his lips again. His tongue against my teeth. It took all of my willpower to stop kissing him back long enough to ask. "Did you test it yet?"

"Nah," he answered reluctantly, with a heavy sigh. "Gotta finish fixing up some of the cars before we can test it."

"Okay, good," I said. "I don't wanna miss seeing it working for the first time."

"You'll be the first to know, I swear," he said, cupping my cheek to keep my face turned toward him. "Can I kiss you now?"

"Impatient man," I laughed, "Yes, you can."

"Finally," he sighed, his breath tickled my face. "Been thinkin' 'bout ya all day."

I was glad it was dark, so he couldn't see how much I was blushing. Still spooning me, he took advantage of my stunned silence to kiss me again. Urgent and soft all at once, like the taste of me was something he'd been starved of for months. I slipped my tongue into his mouth and felt the vibrations of his moan through his broad chest pressed tight against my back. One hand took my hip, pulling my lower body flush against his. I felt his hard length pressing against my ass, making it clear exactly what kind of thoughts he'd been having all day.

Oh.

Holy shit.

I broke the kiss again, out of shock more than anything else. The good kind. The kind that made my heart flutter like crazy. "All day?"

"Mmmhmm," he nodded against my shoulder before planting a kiss there. "Can't be in that damn workshop without thinkin' about fucking ya."

My heart fluttered again at his admission and at the memory of his mouth between my thighs. The same lips and tongue that had teased me into sweet oblivion were now trailing hot kisses on the back of my neck again. Each one was slow and deliberate. "Sounds… distracting."

"Damn straight. And knowin' I'm coming home to ya at the end of the day? Finding you like this…all tucked up in bed in just your panties and shirt…" He thumbed the shirt I was wearing, "This is one of mine, too, ain't it?"

"Yes," I admitted and felt him smile against my neck. He slipped one arm underneath me, and the hand from that arm started sneaking up my body to touch me under his shirt. His warm palm on my stomach drifted slowly further up to cup my breast. His other hand rested on top of my hip.

"So damn cute when you do that," his voice was low by my ear. My breath hitched in my throat as his thumb brushed ever so lightly against one of my nipples. It immediately hardened under his touch; it was crazy how quickly my body responded to him. His thumb lightly traced it, circling, making me writhe against him. My hips ground back against his lower body, and his lips found their way to my neck again. "How's a guy supposed to think about anythin' else all day when he's got somethin' so sweet waiting for him at the end of it? Huh?"

"You want me to sleep somewhere else?" I asked, smiling because I already knew the answer. "Help you keep your focus?"

"Fuck no," he said. The hand resting on my hip grazed across it and dipped between my thighs. "But you're causing me no end of trouble. How am I supposed to be someplace else when all I really wanna be is right here?"

Two of his thick fingers stroked me through my underwear. I bit my lip in a futile attempt to stifle a moan. I ground my hips against the sensation of his erection at my back and his fingers pushing against my clit.

"God, I love it when you squirm for me," he whispered, rolling my hard nipple between his fingers in a way that made my eyes roll back in my head. His hips moved, too, grinding his erection against me. "You're so fucking sexy, Naomi."

I couldn't believe my ears. He'd always found it easier to say what was on his mind when nobody was looking at him, having the lights off was letting him express things he usually held back. Since we'd started sleeping together, I'd learned there was a whole other side to him that was completely new to me. New to him too, I think. And coaxing it out of him was proving to be the single hottest use of my time on this earth.

Who knew that after all this time I'd still find new things to learn about him, new ways to love him?

"Tell me to stop, baby, if you wanna go back to sleep…." Hot breath against my neck as he barely moved his lips from my skin to speak, his voice was thick with need. "But I want you, angel. Right now."

"Holy shit, Daryl." I reached behind me, slipping my hand between our bodies to stroke him through the fabric of his boxers. I could feel the heat of it even through the material.

"Fuuuck," Daryl grunted, moving against my hand as I gripped the thick ridge in his boxers, "Is that a yes, darlin'?"

"Yes, Daryl." I nodded even though he couldn't see me. His hand was still buried between my thighs, his fingers making deep, rhythmic strokes across the dampening cloth there. I moved my own hand, slipping down through the elastic of his boxers to touch the length of him. Hot, silky skin against my palm, I ran my hand from tip to base, cupped his balls, and stroked back up again.

"Fuck, baby," he breathed, curling his fingers harder against the material separating him from my clit. "Ya got the touch of an angel, I swear to God…"

I ran my hand down again, stopping at the base to wrap my fingers around it. Grip it tight. Daryl let out a long, low breath. I slid my hand back up. "You're so hard for me, Daryl. God, I want your cock in me."

Thrills ran up my spine when I felt his cock throb at my words. He nipped at my ear, tugging at his shirt on my body, "Can I take this damn thing off you now?"

I sat up so he could lift it over my head. "I only put the damn thing on because it smells like you, and I missed ya."

Not having his arms around me was starting to feel like some kind of crime. The second my shirt was off, Daryl flung it out into the dark of our room. I felt his lips across my back, his hands roaming the front of my body. He pushed me back down onto my side. "Missed me, huh? How much?"

"I'm so wet for you," I whispered. Touching me lightly across my stomach, the ridge of my hip bone, Daryl's hand found its way back between my thighs, this time dipping under the waistband of my panties to verify it for himself.

"Fuck, so you are." Daryl gave another grunt of satisfaction and then tugged my underwear down. I reached down to slide it past my knees as he freed his hard cock from his boxers. I felt it push in between my closed thighs. One arm underneath me crossed my upper body so that his fingers could keep lightly teasing my nipples. His other held my hips in place while he rolled his against mine, rubbing his hard cock against my slick slit.

I almost begged him to put it in right there and then, but thankfully I had my wits about me enough not to.

"Mmm, wait, Daryl, we should-"

"Yeah, I know," he sighed. "I got you, girl, don't move."

He shifted a little behind me, and I heard the rustle of a condom wrapper in the dark. I waited as he rolled it on, wondering if I should turn to face him even though he'd explicitly asked me not to. Well, he hadn't asked so much as demanded it, but somehow I didn't mind. Whatever part of me that melted when he gave me one of his crazy pet names also fluttered when he got a little bossy.

I felt the heat of him at my back again, his legs behind mine, one of his hands slid over my thigh and then slipped between them again. His voice was gruff, "Open up for me, sweetheart."

I opened my leg a little, and he gripped my thigh in his warm hand, holding it up as he pressed the rubber-clad swollen head of his cock against my entrance.

"I'll go slow, baby, I know you been sleepin'," he said. I was wide awake now, but there was something so quiet and tender in his voice and in the way he slowly pushed inside me that it drew a long moan from my lips. It was the tip, but the anticipation made me shiver. He kissed my neck again and whispered, "That's it, angel, jus' like that…"

"Oh, fuck," I gasped as he slowly rocked his hips back and forth, pulling back only to push a little more of himself in each time.

"Nice an' slow," he breathed. I wasn't sure if it was to remind me or himself, but there was no way I could forget. I was blissfully aware of where he was filling me and the space aching for the rest of him. "There's my girl."

"Why you always gotta make me wait like this?" I groaned.

"You don't like it?" he asked. I felt his smile against my neck. "'Cause the way you're moaning suggests somethin' very different, Naomi."

"No, I like it," I said. It wasn't a complaint, not really. Everything he was doing was such sweet torture, but I felt like I was about to explode from the sheer need that was building inside me. "But fuck me, you're such a goddamn tease."

"I like knowing my girl's ready for me," he said, continuing to rock slowly into me, giving me time not just to adjust to the size of him but also to start longing for more. "And that ya want me."

How the fuck could I want anything else?

Slowly, he stroked himself all the way inside of me. I cried out, feeling his hot length as deep inside me as he could get. "It's not a want, Daryl, it's a fuckin' need."

Daryl exhaled sharply through his nose, but my words earned me a slight increase in his pace. He slipped an arm underneath me again, using it to hold my body flush against his. Hitting a spot inside me that made me weak. My eyes rolled back in my head involuntarily, "Fuck, how do you do that?"

"Do what, angel?" He knew. I could tell from the smugness in his voice and how he angled himself so that he could hit the right spot even deeper this time that he knew.

"You always know right where to…" The words dissolved on my tongue, my head too foggy with desire, and the way he was making me clench around him as he pushed in and out. My hips rolled back against him, trying to coax him into going a little faster. "Fuck, Daryl…you really know how to fuck me…"

"Yeah… well, I wanna treat my girl right," he said, but some of his control was slipping. I could feel it in the way his fingers dug deep into my thigh and the increasing momentum of his thrusts.

"You always do," I said. I hooked my raised leg over him, freeing up his hand. Warm, rough skin across my stomach as he ran it up my body to cup my breast. Roll my nipple between his fingers and make me squirm again. "You know just how to touch me… Nobody's ever touched me like you do."

Daryl groaned. "You're gonna have to stop talkin' like that, girl, or I ain't gonna last."

I smiled.

"Nobody's ever fucked me like you do... or made me want them as bad as I want you, Daryl."

He exhaled sharply through his nose, the same way he does when he's annoyed I'm beating him at something. "What did I just tell ya?"

"You want me to shut up, Daryl? You're gonna have to make me."

"Listen, baby, I love those pretty little sounds you make," he said, fucking me harder and deeper. His hand had moved back down to grip my hip, and the one hooked underneath me pulled me tight against his chest, holding me right where he wanted me. Drilling his hard cock into me over and over. "But I'm damn lucky these lights are off. You look so fucking pretty taking my cock, do ya know that? Ain't no way I could handle you running your pretty little mouth like this if I could see ya too. My beautiful girl."

Okay, yeah, that'll do it.

God bless the dark for letting him say these things. And for hiding how damn red my face was flushing. It worked, too. I couldn't say a damn thing. I could feel my mouth hanging open, but all that was coming out were these high-pitched moans that sounded closer to sobs than anything else. It had taken me so long to convince him that it was okay to be a little rougher with me, that I was not going to break if he fucks me a little harder, and here I was, breaking in the most exquisite way.

"Fucking hell, Naomi," his fingernails dug deep into my hip. His other hand grabbed mine, our fingers as intertwined as we were. I tilted my head back and his lips caught mine again, hot and hungry. "God, you're so wet tonight, pretty girl."

"Daryl…" It was more of a whine than a moan as he pounded into me.

"Somethin' you want, Naomi?" he asked.

"You're gonna make me cum," I managed to choke out the words.

"Oh yeah? You gonna cum for me, angel?" he said. "C'mon then, baby. Let me feel ya cum all over my cock. Cum for me, angel.

I vaguely remember his name burning on my lips and then it seared through me in pulsing waves. Pleasure so strong I'm certain I'd have fallen apart if he hadn't been holding me so tightly to him. I'd never felt such a goddamn high.

"That's it, angel. That's my girl," he muttered soothingly in my ear. He'd slowed his strokes, which only served to prolong the waves of pleasure coursing through me. His hand moved back to hold up my trembling thigh. "Look at you, sweet thing, you're shaking."

"God, I love you so much," I said, trying to catch my breath. Trying to think straight again.

"Oh, fuck," his breathing got more erratic, his thrusts suddenly faster. Behind me, his body stiffened. Mine was so limp but so ready for him - like a goddamn ragdoll he could throw around. All I wanted was his pleasure. I didn't know if it was that he'd just taken me over the edge, or hearing that I loved him, or a mix of the two, but he was suddenly a hell of a lot closer himself. "Naomi, you're… you're…"

"I'm all yours, Daryl," I murmured to him.

Daryl let out a deep groan, a hint of amazement in his voice. "What did you just say?"

"What, you think I didn't know? You think I don't know who I belong to? I'm yours, Daryl." Our hands gripped each other tight in the dark as I felt him twitch and throb inside me. I clenched around him again. "I love you so damn much."

He held me tight against him as he came, a deep guttural moan roaring out of him and a final few slow strokes of his cock inside me while he finished. Panting, his body relaxed. I sighed, satisfied. Wrapping his arms around me, he squeezed my naked body tight against his. His chin rested on my shoulder, cheek pressed against mine. "I love you too, baby, you have no idea."

We lay like that for a moment, catching our breath. It was the only sound in the now quiet dark. His cock still inside me, Daryl nuzzled against my neck. I reached back and stroked his hair.

"You're incredible, Daryl," I said. My whole body was so tired, so satisfied.

"Ain't nothin'," he mumbled, but he squeezed my body a little tighter.

"Nah, I meant everything I said - about how you touch me, how you fuck me. Nobody could love me like you do."

I could feel him breathing against my back, his face nestled into me because even though it was dark, even though I had my back to him and couldn't see him even if the lights were on, he still had to hide to say, "You're everything to me. I can't lose ya. I won't ever be able to let you go."

"I don't want to go anywhere," I assured him. "I wanna be right wherever you are."

"Let's get you cleaned up, sweetheart," he said. The place where we joined was embarrassingly wet, but I tried not to feel too self-conscious about it because I knew he always got a kick out of knowing how much he turned me on. He pulled his softening cock out of me. "Gimme a sec, angel."

I felt him roll away and closed my eyes for a moment, still basking in how good I felt.

"Um…what the fuck?" Daryl muttered to himself and then, slightly louder, "Oh… shit.

"You good?" I propped myself up on my elbow. That hadn't been a good 'oh shit'.

"Um… I think the condom broke."

Fuck.

Cold panic gripped me. I sat bolt upright, "What?"

Daryl flicked on a nearby lamp, and neither of us was left in any doubt that the damn thing had well and truly split. He gulped, "I thought something felt… different, but I never… I didn't think…"

Before he could form a full sentence, I was on my feet and scrambling into any clothes I could get my hands on. I bolted to the nearest bathroom.

I cleaned myself up as best I could but it all felt futile. The damage, if there was any, would be hard to mitigate at this point. Head in my hands, heart racing, I sank down onto the toilet seat.

What the fuck do I do?

What are the chances of finding non-expired Plan B in the apocalypse?

I'm betting it's zero.

Mia and I had both been C-section babies. Momma had taken every opportunity she could find to remind me how difficult her pregnancy had been with me. Things neither of us would have survived without the intervention of modern medicine. How my birth had single-handedly ruined her life.

I'd spent my life avoiding finding any similarities between me and my Momma, but they cropped up from time to time. The temper I had, the all-consuming rage that had driven me to kill Ronnie was the same anger she'd turned on me when she'd burned cigarettes into my skin. Now, I was forced to stand in front of the bathroom mirror and ask - Were we built the same? Were my hips narrow like hers? Did I look like her?

What if I end up just like her?

What if I damage my kid like she broke me?

This had always been my deepest fear when the topic of kids came up. But it had never before come up in such a real, possible way. And that had all been before I had to think about keeping them alive in a world like this one. I knew if I started thinking about that I'd never leave the bathroom. So I forced myself back out into the hallway.

I took a moment outside our bedroom door. Caught up in my own panic, I hadn't had time to think about how freaked he might be.

Shit. Poor guy.

I closed my eyes, took a deep calming breath and opened the door. He stood up when I came in, hands nervously fidgeting with his own fingers.

"Hey," I said softly. "Sorry, I ran out on ya, I just had to…try and… deal with that."

"'S'okay," he said. "You okay?"

"Yeah," I forced my voice to sound as light as possible. "You?"

"Yeah," he nodded.

"It'll be okay," I said, unsure which of us I was trying to reassure. Nothing but a negative pregnancy test or the arrival of my period would calm me down, so I hoped I could keep the worry away from Daryl until we knew for sure we had something to worry about. I sank onto our bed.

"I'm so sorry," he said quietly, sitting down next to me. "I didn't feel it happen or anything. Or maybe I did, but I didn't realize at the time… I never thought… I didn't..."

I put a hand on his arm. All the things he could have been stressed about right now, and the thing he was most worried about was that I was blaming him for it?

Maybe reality hasn't set in yet.

"It's okay," I said again, and this time I meant it. "Accidents happen, it's not on you. We're good."

"Good," he looked relieved. I waited for the other panic to set in - the looming realization that one slip-up could thrust him into fatherhood. I tried to ease it before it hit him.

"Statistically, it's unlikely that y'know…." I couldn't even bring myself to say the word 'pregnant' in case I spoke it into being. "...from one time. Some people have to try for years before…"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I know."

"You're so… calm," I said, studying his face in the half-light for any sign that he was trying to hide it from me. "How are you so calm?"

"I mean… it ain't like we can know anything for sure right now," he said with a little shrug of his shoulders. He looked down at his fingers again. "So I guess we'll just…figure things out when we do, right?"

What the fuck does that mean?

"Yeah, I guess," I said. I lay down. My head was spinning. I was too exhausted to keep sitting upright.

Daryl lay down next to me, and he put his arm around me. "It'll be alright, Naomi. No matter what. I got you."

"Mmhmm." I rested my head on his chest. My chances of a restful night's sleep were dwindling to zero, but I couldn't get my head around how calm he seemed now. Was he doing the same thing I was? Panicking and trying to play it cool so he didn't freak me out.

Maybe he actually wasn't scared yet. Maybe it hadn't sunk in, or maybe it was just because he hadn't spent his life fearing this moment the way I had. My pregnancy anxiety felt like a disease. If I started talking about pregnancy complications and mortality rates, he'd spin out. He barely held it together when I caught a fever or got a cut. Having to make plans about how he'd raise a baby alone if I died in childbirth wasn't a conversation I felt strong enough to have right now. Before I could broach it with him, I needed to make peace with it.

I heard him drop off to sleep, and tried to find the usual comfort I got from listening to his steady breathing. Most likely, he thought I was overreacting, being overly cautious.

Maybe he was right.

It was one time, right? One little accident. Nothing was certain.

Daryl

I didn't want to be away from Naomi, but we'd promised Mia regular trips to Alexandria, and Rick had things he wanted to discuss with us. Apparently, you can't just put all of that on hold because there's a very, very small chance that the love of your life is carrying your child especially when you can't tell anyone that because you don't know for sure and won't know for a few torturous weeks.

Naomi had asked me to take Mia this time. She'd said it was because Rick wanted an update on the fuel, and we had to arrange a way of getting Alexandria's vehicles to Sanctuary so I could modify them, but I couldn't help wondering if she was trying to keep me distracted.

It didn't matter where I was; Naomi was all I could think about. That had always been true, but it felt even more pronounced now. Rick kept trying to talk to me about some run into D.C. he wanted to do when winter passed, but I couldn't take in much of what he was saying. Even though he was talking about getting old farming supplies from some museum, therefore lessening our reliance on the small amount of fuel Sanctuary would be able to produce, I couldn't listen for too long. My mind kept wandering. He didn't say it, but I could tell Rick wished Naomi had come instead of me because she'd have loved this kind of shit. I wasn't offended because I wished she was here, too.

I've never been known as a patient man, but this was driving me out of my mind. Waiting for some test to tell me if our whole future was changing, I couldn't do it. I was itching to know. I wanted her to take the damn thing now.

Wait.

Do we even have pregnancy tests?

It hadn't occurred to me to ask. Or check. I wouldn't be able to go on a run to get one until I'd got Mia back to Sanctuary, but the thought of having some small thing to do was tantalising, which is how I wound up sneaking into Alexandria's storage rooms and shuffling through their medical supplies.

"Not stealing from us, are you?" Rick's cheerful voice made me want to run a mile.

"No," I said quickly, but I sprang away from the shelves I'd been rummaging in before he could get too close a look at where I'd been looking.

Too late. He frowned. "Are you not feeling well? If you're looking for something specific, I can get Denise, she's got a pretty good idea of how the meds are stocked."

It wasn't all that long ago that a cop catching a guy like me rooting through medical supplies would have arrested me on the spot. And he'd have been right; I'd most likely have been stealing gear for me and Merle.

Fuck. Who in their right mind would wanna have a kid with a guy like me?

No wonder she freaked out.

"Nah, I'm fine."

Rick frowned, expecting me to say something and explain myself, but I couldn't think anything except Naomi might be pregnant. I hadn't been able to think of anything else all week. "Is it Mia? Is she feeling okay?"

"Mmhmm," I nodded. Again, no excuse came outta me. I didn't have any space in my brain to think of one.

"Ok-ay," Rick said slowly, still giving me the space to pull an excuse out of my ass. When I didn't, he continued, "Well, I came looking for you because Michonne and I were hoping to go over some of our ideas about that D.C. trip."

"Yeah. Fine," I said. I knew I should walk away from the supply shelves and find some other time to come back, but my feet had grown roots.

"First off, as a head's up, Carl is desperate to come with us to D.C.," he said. "Michonne and I haven't decided yet and probably won't until we are clearer on what the trip entails and how dangerous it might be."

"Right," I said.

It seemed to have fuck all to do with me, and that thought must have shown on my face because Rick followed up with, "If we let Carl join us, I assume Mia will want to come too, and it might be harder for you guys to say no if we've already okayed Carl being on the team. Just wanted to raise that now so you're not caught off guard when she asks."

"Alright. Thanks."

"Also, they'll probably start asking early," he said. "And if Mia's anything like Carl, then she might do that whole divide and conquer thing that kids sometimes do."

He said it like I was supposed to know what the Hell that meant. "Divide and conquer?"

"Yeah, you know, they ask for something, but they ask for it separately. That way if Mom says no but Dad says yes, they already have someone on side to convince the other one."

Something in my chest ached at the way he assumed Naomi and my mutual responsibility for Mia. I know Noami was coming close to seeing things that way, but I was sure it would take Mia a while, if ever, to put us in equal standing like that.

"Oh," I said. There was a lump in my throat. There'd been one there a lot over the last week. "Yeah, that divide and conquer. Sneaky. Thanks."

"Secondly, we don't wanna go until we know we have a good supply of fuel to make the trip there and back," he said. "And enough vehicles to carry back everything we're hoping to get. So if you could just quit creeping around in here and come back inside the house so that Michonne and I can talk through where we're at with all that..."

"Fine," I sighed, starting to move toward him in the doorway. I felt a deep pull back toward those shelves, like the answer to my life's biggest question was nestled right there between some aspirin and a band-aid.

"Sorry, Daryl, I gotta know," he said. "What the hell are you looking for in here?"

I fought the urge to tell him to go to Hell, but I knew that wouldn't have been fair. He had no way of knowing how badly he was prying into my business right now, or how personal this was. Plus, I was technically looting supplies from a community that wasn't my own anymore. He had every right to stick his nose in.

"This stays between us?"

Rick's expression changed to one of deep concern. "Of course, Daryl. You're my brother, you can trust me. You know that."

I nodded, appreciating the sentiment, but so far this had just been something between Naomi and me. Nobody else. Bringing someone else in so early felt wrong, like a jinx. I took a deep breath. "You got any pregnancy tests?"

The smile that broke out across Rick's face almost split it in half. He stepped up like he was about to hug me. "Woah, Daryl, are you guys trying? That's huge, man-"

"No," I backed away from him. "Not exactly, we…"

I didn't even know how to say it. I already felt like I'd shared way too much, but I didn't want people gossiping. Setting the record straight with Rick would mean he knew not to run his mouth about it unless he got confirmation that we were actually expecting.

Thankfully, Rick got it. "Ah. A scare, huh?"

"Somethin' like that," I shrugged, but 'scare' didn't feel like the right word.

"Been there, man," Rick chuckled as he walked deeper into the storage room toward the shelves of Alexandria's spare medical equipment.

"You have?"

"Yeah," Rick said, reaching up to slide a box off the top shelf. "Lori and I were so young when we met. We were still at school - kinda like you guys, I guess."

"Kinda," I said, although it didn't feel that similar to me at all. I couldn't imagine having the guts to make a move on her back then. I got a sudden flash of how Rick must've been at high school, all confident and popular.

"Lori comes to me one day in our senior year all freaked out because her period was late," Rick said. "She was convinced she was pregnant and we were gonna have to go home and tell her parents."

"What did you do?"

"I did what I thought was right," he said. "I asked her to marry me. Boy, was that a mistake."

"A mistake?" I repeated. How could that be true? She'd said yes, they'd had more than ten years together before the world ended. I knew he'd found something special with Michonne now, but was he really calling all of that a mistake?

"Yeah, she turned me down," Rick said. "It really pissed her off, actually. She said that proposing just because she might be pregnant, not because I really wanted to marry her. In hindsight, I can see where she was coming from, I just panicked and blurted it all out."

"So what happened?"

"Well, it turned out she wasn't pregnant, she was just late," Rick shrugged. "She eventually cooled down, and I made sure that when I asked her to marry me for real she was one hundred percent sure that it was because I wanted her."

"But how did you and Lori know?" I asked. "When it was for real, I mean… with Carl?"

I sidestepped asking about Judith. I remembered that whole mess well enough.

"Oh," his eyebrows raised a little as he thought back. "Well, we'd been trying for a kid since our wedding, so he wasn't much of a surprise. Lori was so excited she was basically taking a pregnancy test a week so we didn't have much time for her to notice any… changes."

"Right," I nodded, but suddenly the gulf of information about what those changes might be reared up in front of me. "Like… morning sickness and stuff?"

"Yeah," Rick nodded, studying me. "Lori got sick pretty bad at first. Wasn't always in the morning though, they don't always tell you that so we were not prepared."

"Did anything help her?"

"Has Naomi been…?"

"No. It would be way too early for that," I said quickly. He'd laugh if he knew how ahead of myself I was getting. "I just…wanna be prepared…and know what to look out for, y'know? So I can look after her if she ain't feeling good."

Rick gave me a look that made me wish I hadn't said anything. "Well ain't that-"

"Don't," I warned him.

"Alright, well, from what I remember, she was constantly drinking ginger tea, which she hated but it was the only thing that stopped her feeling nauseous. She only wanted to eat plain foods, which given how much you can't eat when you're pregnant was probably a blessing."

Oh no, Naomi loves snacks.

"Shit, that's right," I said.

"Of course, some of that wouldn't be a problem now," Rick said. "It ain't like Naomi can go on a sushi run. But, she might have to be careful with some of that Hilltop cheese. Eggs can be risky too, I think. And make sure any meat she eat is cooked all the way through."

I nodded, wondering if I should be writing any of this down and hoping Naomi would be okay with me cooking her food so thoroughly it was basically charcoal. "Alright, what else?"

"Well, the obvious ones like alcohol and coffee," he said.

Shit, she loves coffee too.

"Right."

"Honestly, you'd be better off asking Michonne while you're here," Rick said. "Maggie's literally going through it right now, I'm sure she'd -"

"Nah," I cut him off real quick. "I shouldn't even have told you."

"Okay," he said. "When you know for sure, then."

"Yeah."

"Until then," he pulled two small, flat boxes out of the bigger box he'd pulled down from the top shelf. He handed the pregnancy test to me, and I was surprised something so important could come in such a small box. "Good luck, man… for whichever outcome you want."

He smirked as he said it, because I'm pretty sure he could see it written on my face. Even though I was doing my best to hide it. Even though it had such a slim chance of happening. I knew that. I repeated it to myself over and over. So how was it I could already feel that baby in my arms? How could I already feel their little hand wrapped around my finger, looking up at me with a smile just like their Momma's - beautiful and all for me.

"Thanks," I said. I slipped them so carefully into my back pocket. Would they stop working if they got squished? I didn't think so, but now they felt like the most important things I'd ever held. "I'll just go and hide these in my bag, then I'll be right in and we can talk about D.C. or whatever."

"Alright," Rick was still grinning at me like an idiot. "See you in there."

"Yeah," I nodded, and left before I had to deal with any more of that shit-eating grin.

I sped-walked back to Aaron's house where Mia and I were staying. Carl, Mia and Perla were sitting out on the same porch bench that Naomi and I had our first proper conversation on when we'd found each other again.

"Daryl?" Mia stood up when she saw me coming.

Shit.

I tugged the back of my shirt over the two test boxes peeking out of it. We'd agreed nobody would know until we were certain, and that was doubly true for Mia.

"You guys good?" I asked them, not stopping to chat as I climbed the steps up to the house. My new stash was burning a hole in my pocket. Carl and Perla kind of nodded, and I hoped Mia would get the message that I was busy.

No such luck, Mia followed me into the house. "Are you going to talk to Rick about the D.C. trip?"

News travels fast, huh?

"Maybe," I said. "Why?"

"Can I go, Daryl? Please?"

It hit me for a second, that she was actually asking me. That she thought I had some kind of say over her life. Rick's advice echoed in my head, and I couldn't let the moment overwhelm me. "Maybe. I'll need to talk about it with Naomi."

"We could all go," she said. "Then Naomi and I could show you -"

"It ain't a tourist trip, Mia." I said, stopping her before she could try and tempt me with a tour of things that I'd desperately wanted to see before the world ended. "It's dangerous."

"But…" Mia said. "Carl's going…"

"That ain't been decided yet, actually," I said. She looked embarrassed that I'd caught her in a lie.

"Alright," she admitted. "But I do know my way around."

"So does your sister," I reminded her with a shrug. "Sure does Bryce. I'm sure a lot of folks do."

"Fine," she sighed, admitting temporary defeat.

"We can talk about it closer to the time," I said. "When we've had a chance to scout out how dangerous it'll be. Alright?"

"Okay," she looked disappointed, and turned to leave. "Hey, kid… before ya go…"

"Yeah?" she spun on her heels in the doorway.

God, I don't know how to start this conversation.

"You know I love your sister, right?"

"Ye-es," Mia said slowly, a little frown flickering across her face. "Where's this going?"

"Well, you're the only family she's got and I know usually you ask a dad this kind of shit but she's never-"

Mia made noise in a pitch higher than I'd ever heard another human being make. "Oh my god. Are you… are you going to propose?!"

"Keep your voice down."

"She's miles away, she can't hear us!"

"Yeah, I know, but…" I took a deep breath. "Look, I might not ask for a while. We ain't been… I don't wanna rush anything."

"Rush? You've known each other longer than I've been alive."

"I know, but we've only actually been a couple for…"

"No," Mia said. "Stop it. You know her. You make her happy. Like, actually properly happy. You have to ask her."

My face felt like it was on fire. I'd shared way too much with way too many people today. "I want to, but I probably ain't gonna ask for a while. I just wanted to know if you'd be okay with it."

"Yes I'd be okay with that!" Mia nodded, she had this big smile on her face and made that damn squealing noise again. "God, this is why you've been so weird lately. It all makes sense."

"I have not."

"You have. You've been all… quiet and distracted."

"I just… want it to be the right time, y'know?" I sighed. "So… don't tell anyone, okay?"

"I won't," she said. I thought she might run off to hang on with her friends again, but she didn't. "Hey, you know that means you'll be my brother, right? Like, officially, my brother-in-law."

"Yeah, I guess I would. You okay with that?"

Mia hugged me. "I think I'll like that."

"Yeah, I reckon I will too," I hugged her back. "...if she says yes."

"She will," Mia rolled her eyes and let go of me.

"You think?" I asked as she walked back out of the room.

"I know," she called back over her shoulder as she practically skipped out of the room to rejoin her friends.

God, I hope that kid can keep a secret.

Finally alone, I took the pregnancy tests back out of my back pocket and knelt down by my back. I wrapped them up in a bandanna. Not sure why, maybe to hide them or maybe to keep them safe. I put the little bundle into my backpack, and gave myself a second to sit down on the sofa and catch my damn breath.

I could hear Mia's voice outside, but not what they were talking about. I'd wanted her to know, wanted to make sure she was okay with me being a permanent part of her sister's life. But, now I was worried I'd asked too fast. I had no idea when I'd even ask Naomi herself. Now that we had something else going on, I didn't want her to think I was asking just because I'd knocked her up. On the other hand, what the fuck was I waiting for?