AN: Alright everyone, I officially put "One Knuckleheaded Glutton" on hiatus. I worked on that story for the entire summer, updated it as friggin daily as I could...I think I can take a break from it for at least a month, if not two. (Eyeing open window of In-Progress OKG ch 64)...Yeah, a break.

Disclaimer: Bonesboy15 doesn't own Helluva Boss or Naruto. The following is a written work of fan-fiction. It contains adult language and situations. Reader discretion is advised.

Who's That Father?

Wreck

(Then: Beelzehaven, Mosh Pit Gym)

The sounds of paws, claws, fists and feet colliding with skin kept the blood flowing fast. In the Pit were two titanic musclebound wolf-like Hellhounds that exchanged furious blows with each other, cheered on by groups of various breeds around them. Ignoring the roars, howls and barks that encourage chaos, a eighteen-year-old Hellhound squared off outside of the Pit with his personal trainer. A series of punches, swipes and kicks landed against the pads on his trainer's larger arms when the shorter Hound took a surprise kick to the jaw that had him stumble back and work the hinge.

"Don't get complacent! Mix it up!" The white-furred trainer barked. The younger Hound growled at him and rushed in again, another combination of punches, claw swipes, kicks and even a bite kept the older Hound on the backpedal.

"Good, good! Faster! C'mon, Brat! Stay light on your feet!" The white Hound barked as he twisted and caught the shorter Hound's next kick at the ankle. He tugged the shorter Hound's captured leg in and thrust an open palm into the exposed stomach. The shorter Hound stumbled back and dropped to his knee. He groaned as he cradled his gut and the trainer crossed his arms. "You done? Wanna call it here? Need some bandages for your boo-boos?"

"Piss off!" The orange Hound snarled and slammed his balled up, taped paw into the soft layer of dirt that made up the training arena before he pushed himself back to his feet. His side throbbed and left him with a grimace he couldn't wipe from his face, but he ignored the pain for the most part. The older Hound training him grinned and clapped his hands.

"Atta boy, c'mon!" The trainer lifted his pads up as the shorter Hound rushed in again with another furious barrage. "Left! Left! Watch your left guard, Brat! Incoming right–Good! Stay on it, keep moving your ears, let the body do what it knows! Don't just trust your eyes!"

The sudden and loud wails of a puppy had all the action in the gym come to a complete stop. The shorter Hellhound in particular backed away from his trainer and started to seek out the sound's source, and found it approaching him. The source was in the arms of a young, distressed, Husky-like Hellhound with periwinkle fur, dressed in rags that might have once been decent clothes. All of the Hounds in the gym tensed, for every Hound present easily recognized a Pack Pup as most Gluttony inhabitants did, and many started to reach for concealed weapons to protect themselves in the event this was a ruse. Pack Pups didn't wander alone or away from their Pack's territory very often, and if they did, it was never for a good reason.

The rattled periwinkle She-Hound, maybe a freshly turned teen if not younger, seemed to zero in on him the second he locked eyes on her package and rushed to meet him. He was already making strides towards her and shoving other Hounds out of his way. Any that snarled or barked at him got snarl back and they cowed. He wasn't the largest hound in the gym, but he was the toughest. (Well, he had the credentials that proved it, anyway.)

"Mr. Naruto!" She cried as he took his wailing puppy into his arms and held her against his chest. "Thank Beelzebub. I found her outside of Derelict Drugs while Scavy and I were making a Bre-er, while we were on a run."

"Thank you, uh–?"

"Maureen Connor. I'm with the Drifty Dregs off of 23rd."

"23rd?!" "That's four blocks away." "Pack Pup ran far for that paycheck." "That pup's got brains, hope Party Years don't kill 'em."

"Get back to yer fuckin' training, ya nosy fucks!" The large white-furred trainer barked at the murmuring Hounds as he walked up to join the group. Jiraiya reached out and gently scratched the young puppy's ear as she sniffled at him. "Oh, little Wari, did you have an adventure?"

"Mm, Gump fazgnr dungha.."

"Poor little Wari-Wari. It's okay, Daddy and Grump got'cha." He cooed again and tapped her nose before he nicked part of her torn pants and nodded at Naruto, who nodded back. The older hound turned away and pulled a phone out as he called some of his people to get a coherent story on where the Puppy had gone.

"Thank you, Maureen." Naruto looked at the Pack Pup before he focused on his not yet three-year-old. She huffed at his scent and was steadily calming, but her cries and whimpers renewed as he started to check her for injuries. Her pants were scuffed all over and her shirt had a dark red stain on it. It wasn't blood, but RathCrab-berry Juice. "Oh, Baby Girl, what the fuck are you doing out of the house?"

"Who the fuck is supposed to be watching her today?" Jiraiya asked around a snarl once he hung up. Naruto pushed his lips to his exhausted and whimpering puppy's head before he closed his eyes and fought back a snarl.

"Buto." He turned a cold gaze down onto the Pack Pup that hadn't left yet. Smart kid, stick around for the reward, don't do anything for free. "Maureen? Up for a quick job?"

"Um–"

"You do this for me, kid, and I'll get you a week's worth of supplies and a month's worth of food for your Pack. Plus a personal request, in recompense for this." Naruto gently nudged his puppy with his nose before he locked his blue eyes with the pale blues of the Pack Pup before him. "And a Number."

"A-A Number?!" Maureen's eyes went wide and her curled-up tail started to wag furiously. Numbers, specifically Hellphone numbers, were greater than currency to Pack Pups. Being told one was like getting a free meal ticket to cash in on whenever or a place to crash if something went wrong. Most Pack Pups used their acquired Numbers to get odd jobs for cash to cover supplies and food, either for themselves or packmates. With enough Numbers in a pocket, a Pack Pup could easily rise up the hierarchy and, if they were strong enough, could take control of the Pack.

"Good whenever, unless I'm out of town."

"What's the job?"

"Get the word out, spread it across Beelzehaven. Let the word out to all of the Packs that there's a Seeking Hunt." Naruto bared his teeth for a second. He had to close his eyes and take a breath. "Kabuto Yakushi. Find him. Don't engage, do not attack. Just find him, get a routine if you can."

"Seeking Hunt. Kabuto Yakushi. Got it." Maureen nodded. "Um, can I get the Number now and the other stuff after the Hunt's set up?"

"Smart pup." Naruto praised her with a smirk. She knew what was more valuable and in the long run. He looked around before he nodded at a backpack nearby. "One sheet of paper and one pen, I'll take the hit."

Maureen grinned and darted over to dig around in the bag. A strangled yelp came from the Pit and Naruto turned to glare at the taller Hellhound that made the noise, who looked ready to jump down and tackle the Pack Pup. The two older Hellhounds held the gaze for a long second before Maureen ran back, a pen and slip of paper in hand, and the larger hound backed down. Victor of the small dominance stare off and free to turn his attention away, Naruto knelt down and whispered the number to the Pack Pup as she wrote it down.

"Good rule of thumb, don't try to keep the physical copy for more than a day. Read it, memorize it, and eat it." He advised. The young husky-Pack Pup nodded as her pale blue eyes locked with his. He smiled at her and used one hand to ruffle her messy, greasy hair. "Twenty-four hours. Spread the word, use contacts wherever you can. I'll be back here again tomorrow to pay you back your reward."

"Got it! Thank you, Mr. Naruto!" The Pack Pup beamed before she sprinted out. Naruto stood up and looked down at his sniffling puppy.

"Oh, my poor little Pickle. You're about to lose an Uncle you just met." He sighed as he nuzzled the dozing, sniffling puppy. He looked up at Jiraiya with a cold gaze. "Once they find him, I want him buried. I wanted to give him a chance and Rox told me that he was clean, but if Pickle got this far out–"

"He probably stepped out to get something and left the door unlocked. If only your Dommy Mommy not-girlfriend didn't have a gig today." Jiraiya sighed and smirked at the growl Naruto shot at him. He crossed his arms. "Gonna have to borrow some of your mercs to send him a message, Brat."

"Just do it." Naruto huffed as he walked toward the locker room. He needed to wash off his sweat and his puppy was gross, covered in dirt and possibly exposed to some sort of disease if not parasites. The warm water in the locker room's sauna would help them both relax.

(Now: Beelzehaven, Hellhound Heights)

"Aww, Grump! Daddy and Miss Loona ate all the candy!" Himawari whined as she pulled an empty white plastic bag from the Treat Cupboard. She pouted as she dug around the bag. The empty Levi's Licorice Lice Lickers wasn't the only good candy that got eaten. A case of Boogie's Bites, a bag of Wondrous Wiggly Wyrms, and a small box of DOGG Delight Delectable chocolate bars.

Himawari's ears fell back and she whimpered as her eyes burned. She was glad that Daddy and Miss Loona had a really fun sleepover, but she still wished she could've been here for it. Her lips wobbled and she sniffed. She was gonna cry – she was sad she missed the fun sleepover, she was a little scared Daddy didn't want to play with her anymore because she got broken, and she was deathly afraid Miss Loona wouldn't ever want to be her new mommy like Miss Roxanne hadn't for the same reason – but she shouldn't cry because she's a big girl! And everyone always says that big girls don't cry!

Don't cry! You don't need to cry! You're a big girl now, Himawari! Himawari chided herself as she put the empty candy garbage in the bin beneath the sink. She sniffled and rubbed the back of her good paw over her eyes and tried to dry up the tears that kept falling.

"Ugh, I must've fallen asleep waiting for these stupid things to dry. It's been...Ugh, hours? Geez, who am I? Belphegor? I hate his house and his stupid cursed security, that's the first fucking thing I'm asking him about...Oh, hey! It's the cute, little bay-bee! Er, well, maybe not so little right now..." A soft, but familiar voice said before it gasped. "No! Sweet Bay-Bee, don't be sad!"

A buzzing sound had Himawari lower her paw from her face and she blinked. Hovering in front of her with four legs pressed under its chin was a ...Gluttonbee? A strange looking Gluttonbee, one that looked like a very little Queen Bee. Himawari sniffed and giggled at it when it somersaulted forward before it steadied itself.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, there, Sweetling! Watch where you're using that powerful little sniffer!" The Gluttonbee chided with a small grin. Himawari's ears perked up and she rubbed at her eye again.

"...Queen Bee?"

"Got it in one, sweetie!" The Gluttonbee – Queen Bee! – nodded as she put two hands on her hips and two more crossed over her chest. She flashed a big toothy grin and leaned forward, putting her upper hands on her knees. "And you're...Himawari, right?"

"Uh-huh." She sniffed and nodded. Queen Bee let her shoulders sag as she sighed in relief.

"Whew, I was a little worried I got it wrong. The names of some hounds nowadays are just so fuckin' weird, I swear...I met one that was called Pretzel once at one of my parties, and...well, let's just say they were falsely advertising," Queen Bee said with a snicker. The Puppy didn't get it, but the sight of a tiny Sin of Gluttony laughing was enough to make her giggle. Queen Bee grinned again. "There's that cute little smile! So, what's got'cha tasting so lugubrious, Bay-Bee?"

"...What's loo-goo-bree-us?" Himawari asked, brow furrowed.

"Sad, down, upset, glum, bad – basically, it's just another silly way to say all the icky vibes you're letting off. They don't taste that good, and I don't like being around icky vibes." Queen Bee explained as she hopped off Himawari's nose and flew over to the island countertop. Himawari climbed onto a stool to look down at her. Queen Bee crossed her arms. "Now, see, the whole reason I flew over here was so I could look you in the eye again. Then you climbed up and now I'm back at square one."

"Oh, sorry."

"Bah, don't sweat it, Sweetling. I didn't advertise the plan. I should definitely do that more often. Maybe send a blimp out an hour before a House Trashing..." Queen Bee muttered before she shrugged. She zipped up and poked Himawari's nose. "Hey, you didn't answer my question, puppy. What's got that cute little face looking so down?"

Himawari knew she wasn't supposed to talk to strangers, and Queen Bee was...strange. She remembered the last time they talked, and how fun that was. Sure, she didn't get why she tried to take her away from Daddy, but when she was this small, Himawari was pretty sure she couldn't try again. Even if she did, Grump and Daddy weren't far away. Besides, she was just talking.

"...Daddy had a sleepover last night. So did I, and I had fun with Grump, but–"

"Wait, rewind: What's a Grump? Like, a 'grouch'?" Queen Bee tilted her head. Himawari beamed and her tail wagged. She always felt so happy whenever she had to explain who Grump was. No other Puppy she met had a Grump like she did.

"No, Grump is my Great-Grandpa!"

"Grea...Oh!" Queen Bee snapped her fingers. "The Daddy of your Daddy's Mommy or Daddy, right?"

"Yep-yep!" Himawari yipped as her tail wagged. "Grump's my Daddy's Daddy's Daddy. I don't get to see him a lot, but last night he took me back to his shack outside Rave Town so Daddy and Miss Loona could have their sleepover. We hunted Shrigmys, ate candy and bloody steaks for dinner and watched all of Samael: Lilith's Lost!"

"Wow! That sounds like a fun time!" Queen Bee laughed. She grinned up at her. "So, what's your favorite kind of candy?"

"Levi's Licorice Lice Lickers!" Himawari beamed and licked her chops. "They're so sweet and yummy!" Her tail slowed and her smile dimmed as she remembered why she was sad. "I'd offer you some, but we left a bag at Grump's. He said he accidentally left a bag here with Daddy, but I guess he and Miss Loona ate it…"

"Ooh, nope. Sorry, Sweetling. That was me."

"...Did you eat the other candy too?"

"Yeah…Sorry." Queen Bee winced.

"Oh...I guess it's okay." Himawari shrugged. She was still a bit disap-dapisa– She wasn't happy it was all gone, but it was still okay. Queen Bee probably needed the candy more; Missus Marquise told them that The Seven Sins had different needs for food, potty-trips and sleep than Hellhounds, and treats and goodies were always left out on Sinsmas just for her.

"Nope, not if that's what made you upset. I'll get you another bag with all the same treats and then some, sound good?"

"You don't have to–"

"Yes, I absolutely have to." Queen Bee argued with crossed arms. "Just because your Daddy is a dummy that ignores me doesn't give me the right to not own up to my actions."

"...Daddy's ignoring you?" Himawari asked, tilting her head and furrowing her brow. Her Daddy didn't ignore anyone. He listened where he could and always paid attention when he was asked to, if he could. The only time he ignored somebody was if they were part of Their Pack, but her aunties, auncles and uncles never got upset by it. Usually they were just playing and trying to get him to play with them. Even then, Himawari couldn't understand why her Daddy would be ignoring someone as important as Queen Bee.

"Yeah, the smug sexy bastard. Walking around flashing his goods and screwing that cute little side piece of his." Queen Bee huffed. She curled her lip and glared off at the side. "Gonna give those hams of his a good fuckin' chomp after I rough 'em up a bit and tug on that rocket. Make him regret ignoring his fuckin' Queen."

Himawari pouted, she didn't understand those words. She opened her mouth to ask, when a couple of padded steps caught her ears. She looked up and beamed as Daddy walked towards her with a smile on his face and his goofy green shorts on.

"Hey Pickle, did you have a fun night?" He asked once he got close to her and snatched her into a hug. Himawari felt her tail wagging again as she hugged her Daddy back.

"Yeah!" She blinked and then looked down at Queen Bee, then back at Daddy. She frowned at him. "Why are you ignoring Queen Bee, Daddy?"

"...What?" Daddy blinked and one of his eyebrows went up. Himawari pointed at the island countertop, where Queen Bee stood.

"Queen Bee! She says you're ignoring her."

Daddy looked down at Queen Bee and his eyes changed. The black parts got smaller and the blue parts started to glow. A growl rumbled in his throat and he set her down on the kitchen floor.

"Pickle, go talk to Grump and Miss Loona for a bit."

"But–?"

"Himawari." He looked at her with his 'Listen-To-Daddy-Or-No-More-Fun-Today' eyes and his lip curled up. Himawari felt her ears go flat and her tail curl around her legs. Daddy rarely used those eyes on her, only two times so far including right now, but she'd seen him use it on other Hellhounds all the time and it nearly always got him his way. She didn't know how – she was pretty sure it was his secret super power, because she tried to use it on Zara once and all it did was make them fight – it was a scary face, one that told her exactly what he was going to do if she didn't listen. He closed his eyes and his lip relaxed as he put a hand on her head and gently ruffled her hair. The better, nicer, gentler 'Please-Listen-I-Love-You-Good-Girl' eyes looked back at her when he opened his eyes again. "Go. Now."

"...Okay, Daddy."

"Good girl." She kept an ear on the kitchen as she rushed out to find Grump and Miss Loona. Daddy's voice gained the scary 'Or-Else' growl he used on other Hellhounds when he was very mad. There was a loud crash and she hurried into a run to another adult when Daddy's growl turned into a snarl: "Why the fuck did you break into my house?!"

(Beelzehaven, Hellhound Heights)

"That was fun." Loona hummed as she pulled her hair out from the neckline of one of his old Acid Spitters Tour shirts. It worked as a very oversized dress for her, the neckline just barely small enough to not fall around both of her shoulders. She looked at him questionably before she just snagged one of the brushes he didn't use from a drawer he barely opened.

"And an educational experience." Naruto chuckled as he pulled a pair of neon green and black athletic shorts on. He winced as he straightened out and rubbed a portion on the small of his back. "Most shampoo bottles have warnings that it makes for terrible lube."

"Well, yeah, now we know." Loona snorted as she started stroking out tangles and knots the water put her silver-grey hair in. "I'm going to be a fuckin' minute, if you wanna go greet the rugrat go ahead."

"Don't sound too excited." He snorted as he came up behind her, wrapped her now growling form into a hug and leaned over her face to block her view of the mirror before he planted a kiss on her lips. It took a couple of seconds before she reciprocated, but after that, he broke it and got an elbow to the gut. He winced and stumbled back. "Oomph! What the fuck was that for?"

"New rule? Don't glomp on me after a shower." Loona growled. He huffed at her

"Got it. Damn." He smirked as he walked out of his room and then poked his head back in. "I try to show a bitch I like seeing her wet...and this is the way she thanks me."

"That's the best you could come up with?" Loona asked, smirking as she resumed brushing her hair. "...Seven out of ten."

"I just can't win with you, can I?"

"Get used to it, boyfriend."

"And after such great bribery for my girlfriend, too." Naruto huffed around an amused smirk before he resumed his trek downstairs to greet his puppy and grandfather after a wonderful night with his new girlfriend. He expected a lot of things when he came downstairs to see his daughter. From a bored Jiraiya stealing more food and spoiling his pickle rotten to a messy guts and gore-covered puppy that would need to be rushed into a tub before the mess spread across his floors, he was prepared to find anything.

Anything except a miniaturized Queen Bee-lzebub standing on his kitchen island apparently talking to his puppy. That certainly wasn't one of the things on his bingo cards for the day. It was unfortunate that he had to growl at Himawari to get out, he'd have to apologize for the spook later, but to say he was not happy to see Queen Bee-lzebub in his home – not to mention how she was clearly suffering the effects of the curse Asmodeus gave to him and his people to use as a proper home defense system as part of their active arrangement – would be an understatement of epic proportions.

Thus, one could forgive him for smashing his fist through his own kitchen island countertop near where the curse-stricken Sin stood.

"Why the fuck did you break into my house?!" He snarled.

"Hey, watch it!" She sneered up at him and he felt a pulse of heat flare in his collarbone. He cringed and growled down at her, jerking back when she zipped up to glare him in the eye. "Okay, how the fuck do you keep doing that?!"

"No, you don't fucking understand, Bee. I don't care who the fuck you are out there–" He pointed at the door of his home as he bared his teeth at who was technically his superior and – so fucking irritating – owner. He pointed down at his feet. "In here?! This is my house and you are not a goddamned Queen here! You can own the Ring it's in and the land it's on, but you didn't fuckin' build it and you sure as fuck didn't pay for it!"

"...Oh, yeah. You are so getting the Poundcake and Reach Around special–Helurk!" Bee gasped as his right hand snatched her from the air and squeezed.

"Answer my fucking question!" Naruto snarled as his eyes shone. The second the curse wore off – which could be in seconds for all he knew – he would probably get erased. Or eaten. Before that, right now? He was going to take advantage of his...er, advantage.

"Arggghhh fuck! Oh, yeah, you are so fucked when this curse ends!" Bee snapped at him with glowing red eyes. He snarled and tightened his fist some more. "Ahh-ow! You massive dick! I broke in to rock your world, jackass! Happy?!"

"Oh, yeah I'm ecstatic now– No, you party-addicted dipshit, I'm fuckin' irate!" Naruto snarled before he turned and opened his hand to let her flop back on the kitchen countertop. He turned away from her and looked at the damage he did to his own kitchen counter with a frustrated growl. "Fuck, that's gonna be a couple hundred to fix, for sure."

"Ow! Hey, we're aren't fucking done!" Bee flew around into his face again. Her tiny little claw poked the edge of his nose. Ha, it might as well have been a flick. "Why the fuck do you have Belle's security and Ozzie's curse on your fucking house?!"

"Because I'm so fucking rich and paranoid I thought it'd be a worthwhile investment, y'know, for the shits and giggles. Low and behold," he said, flicking a claw at her and missing since she flew out of the way. "The very fucking Sin my puppy adores broke in to, do what? Sate her fuckin' Lust."

"Fuck you, I don't Lust!" Bee snarled. She crossed her arms and looked away with a huff. "I get cravings: It's different!"

"Yeah, sure, just like my hand and paw are two totally different things..." Naruto rolled his eyes and scoffed as he walked over to inspect the damage to the kitchen island. "Fuckin higher demons..."

"You're technically one now!"

"Sure, yeah, that's why I'm only a fuckin' Colonel." He huffed and crouched down to start cleaning up the debris. She buzzed by his ear and he growled, stopping himself from taking a swipe at her. "Would you just fucking buzz off? It's not enough that you own me, but you have to fuckin' annoy me in my fuckin home, too?"

"Yeah, I own you, guess what dipshit, that means I own everything you own!"

"That's not–" Naruto paused and then looked at her with a smirk. "Oh, yeah? So you'll fix the damage to my-I'm sorry, your kitchen island?"

"Fuck no, you broke it and it's your house." Bee snapped with crossed arms.

"But you own me and everything I own."

"You don't own the house." Bee scoffed. "No offense, but I don't know a single Hellhound that actually owns a place and doesn't rent or share–"

"Bitch, I'm not one of your fuckin' Party Pups that sleeps around and gets wasted to crash wherever the fuck they can, y'know! I own this house." Naruto snarled at her. "I didn't just fuckin' drop one-hundred, twenty-five million, thirty-six thousand four hundred twenty-seven dollars and a nickel on a fuckin' rental, y'know. The Deed is mine, the only thing I pay on the fucking regular is water and electricity. ...Oh, shit, that shower earlier is gonna drive it up...Eh, it was worth it."

"...You dropped one-hundred and twenty-five million dollars on this shithole?" Bee stared at him. Glowing blue glared at her from the corner of his eyes.

"Fuck you." He growled as he finished gathering up the debris in the can he kept beneath the sink. He tucked the can back and then braced himself on the sink. "Don't take that as a fuckin' invitation, either. I'd rather choke on a fuckin sandpaper cock."

"Excuse you? I believe the terms of our fuckin arrangement was a dicking down or paralysis–"

"Yeah, but you never outright fuckin' specified when it had to happen or if I had to be fuckin' willing twenty-four-seven." He smirked at her as she scowled. "And you're not the Sin of Lust, so despite you being as fuckin' hot as you are –"

"I fuckin knew you liked our private time!" Bee smirked back and he blew a sharp breath at her that had her tumble away. "Hey!"

"As I was saying, despite you being as fuckin' hot as you are? I'm not fucking interested right now." Naruto leaned against his kitchen counter and crossed his arms as she flew up into his line of sight and landed on his snout. He arched his brow as she opened and closed her mouth several times. He huffed. "No witty comeback? No deals? No offers?"

"...Look, I just need–"

"Don't care. Why don't you go ask Vortex while you still fuckin' can?"

...Shit. Shit! Naruto closed his eyes. How the fuck did he just blow that he knew about that? Stress? No, probably not, most of it was fucked out into Loona last night. Most. Maybe a bit of stress then. Irritation at the Sin he really didn't care for? Especially since she tricked his Pickle into being endeared to her? Probably. ...Thinking about it, it was likely a little mix of everything. Wait, no, he can spin it.

"What the fuck did you just say to me?" Bee asked, tilting her head. She snarled and stomped down on his muzzle when he didn't answer and he growled. "No, what the fuck did you just say?!"

"...I told you Vortex worked for me, didn't I?"

"As a part-timer." Bee growled. Oh, sure she remembered that. Why not?

"Yeah, he had to tender his resignation for some reason, and asked me to find Verosika Mayday a new, trustworthy bodyguard." Naruto glanced at his claws that had been used on his kitchen island. Definitely needed to be fixed before he had any serious meetings. He'd have to ask Priscilla to set up a Spa Day for himself and Himawari sometime over the weekend. Hm, maybe he could invite Loona along? Shit, he could probably cover all of I.M.P. if he wanted...Yeah, spin it like a win and he could get some alone time with his girlfriend–OW! Naruto glared at the Sin on his nose. "What?!"

"How do you know he's leaving?!"

"...What part of the tendered resignation do you not–? Right, Sin, totally forgot who I was talking to. Of course you don't know anything about us when we're not partying." Naruto scoffed. Bee snarled.

"Excuse you?! Did you forget who the fuck I am, Fishpaste?!

"It's really fuckin' hard to when you keep burning my fucking chest." He snarled as he flicked on the Seal she planted on him. She stumbled back before she stomped on his nose again. "Fuck, ow, what?!"

"How do you keep rebuffing my fuckin commands!?"

"You think I fucking know? You're barking up the wrong tree." He grumbled. He narrowed his eyes and curled his lip when she caused another searing pain to pierce his chest. "What now?"

"That one was another test. Not as bad." Bee rubbed her chin. "What's your pain tolerance threshold?"

"I..." He paused and pursed his lips. "I've never actually thought about that, y'know."

"Hm, well, I guess that's something for me to investigate later." Bee hummed. He tried to ignore the way his tail flicked after she said that and furrowed his brows when she laid down on her stomach – still on his snout – to look him in the eye. She smirked. "Got any plans tonight?"

"Dinner with my puppy and girlfriend."

"...Alright. Tomorrow. Plans?"

"No." He cursed a storm up in his head. Why was he honest just now?! He grimaced when her eyes lit up. "I'm guessing I will–"

"You don't want me to crash dinner tonight and I don't want to get stuck in this curse again." Bee tilted her head. "So here's the deal, Na-Ru-To. Everything that happened this morning? Your sass? Your attitude? Ignoring me when I was shouting at you?"

"You were shouting at me?" Naruto tilted his head and she hovered up to avoid being slid off.

"Yeah. Anyway, all that? Your last pass. That's it. No more of this...salty boo-hoo look at my bad vibes, shit." Bee circled a hand in his direction.

"I promise nothing." He curled his lip. "Master."

"...Ew, no, don't call me that. Ugh. You are not a sub."

"I'm glad we both agree on that much." He grumbled and shifted uncomfortably as she lowered back down to lay on his snout and started to scratch it with two of her four hands. "What's the deal? I used my last pass while defending my home from an unwelcome intruder and you'll, what? Get my kitchen fixed?"

"No, piss off. You broke it, Mister Attitude, you fix it." Bee scoffed. He rolled his eyes. Figures. She grinned and started to scratch circles on his nose – he was going to sneeze at this rate – before her lips pressed to the top of his muzzle. "My deal? Saturday night. Private Party. You and me."

"...Vortex know?"

"...Why do you keep bringing him up?" Bee scowled. "Are you in love with him or something?"

"Ha, no." Naruto deadpanned. "But he's still a friend. And just because he backstabbed me, doesn't mean I'm doing the fucking same."

"Well, tough shit. I own you. I'm not exclusive. I decide who I fuck. And I chose you. Lucky you."

"Whoopie." Naruto twirled a finger. He crossed his arms. "What do I tell my girlfriend then?"

"Tell her? Why? Who gives a shit what she thinks?"

"Well, I fuckin do, for one." Naruto scowled. "I'd like to stay in a fuckin relationship for longer than twenty-four hours."

"Fucking dammit, I hate, hate A.A.S.B., stupidist fucking deal I was ever forced into." Bee grumbled. "I dunno, tell the bitch that I threatened to eat your cute puppy or something."

"You're so fuckin' helpful." Naruto grumbled. He rubbed his face, causing the Sin to fly off. "Fuck it, I'll think of something."

"Whatever, if she dumps your ass, that's her decision. Especially if the dicking I heard last night was anything to go by." Bee's giggle had him glare at her.

"You broke in last night?!"

"Yep! It was a great preview for me. Really. I'll let you vent a bit in the first round if you want." She flew in and kissed the tip of his nose. "See ya, Saturday, Na-Ru-To."

She zipped out toward the door and disappeared through the keyhole. She expanded immediately and flew back at his kitchen window. The smack of her flattening against Belphegor's home defense system was satisfying to watch. He smirked as she groaned and glared at him through the window. Her stomach's weird lava-lamp feature turned various hues of yellows, oranges and reds as her eyes shone before she held a hand to her mouth and flicked her tongue between two fingers and humped the window.

"Very mature. So glad you're my Sin." Naruto sighed and rubbed his temples once she flew off. Why couldn't he have been born in Lust? Asmodeus was so fucking chill compared to Beelzebub. He shook his head and went into the fridge to grab some Beelze-Juice. He stared at the bottle blandly before he flicked the cap off. "Fuckin' only good thing that comes from that psycho bitch, I swear..."

"Mm, you've got Beelze-Juice? Yum." Loona hummed as she snatched the bottle out of his hand before he could get a sip. Naruto blinked and ran his tongue on the inside of his jowls. He gave his girlfriend a deadpan stare as she chugged his bottle. She seemed to feel his stare and lowered it, revealing it down to half-empty. "What?"

"...Give it back, for one." Naruto deadpanned. She hummed and twisted around him to lean against the counter.

"Mm, no. Don't think I will. Not for free." This cheeky little–! He narrowed his eyes at her and her tail flicked. Oh, she was feeling playful, was she? "So what do I fuckin' get?"

"What do you get?" Naruto juked around her and pulled her back against him in another hug from behind. Loona snarled and cradled the bottle out of reach, which was fine. He craned his neck over her shoulder and kissed her cheek as he mumbled low enough for only her to hear: "How about you don't get tickled in front of my very playful and adorable puppy, who would totally remember where I tickle you...and use it against you whenever I ask?"

"You're a fuckin' monster." His cute girlfriend groaned as he kissed and nipped at her neck and jaw. She arched her neck to give him better access and lowered the bottle back down to one of his awaiting claws. He gave her one last kiss right on the side of her throat, above her collar, before he pulled back and grinned.

"Thank you." Then promptly chugged the rest of the alcohol. She huffed and leaned against him even after he finished the drink.

"Your grandpa's a pervert." Loona grumbled.

"And fish shit in the ocean. Any other breaking news you want to share with me?" Naruto asked.

"He kept trying to get the Squirt to lift my shirt."

"...Mm, we can kill him in a minute. Gotta talk to you about our favorite Sin."

"Great. So excited." Loona grumbled, which, yeah, he got it. Naruto explained what she wanted from him on Saturday and his freshly obtained girlfriend growled. "This is such horseshit."

"Trust me, Loo, I agree with you."

"You're not complaining, though."

"About hate-fucking a Sin? No."

"Did she use those words explicitly?" Loona grumbled.

"No, not exactly, just implied." Naruto huffed. "I know it's not ideal–"

"Under-fucking-statement."

"But look at it this way: She might own my soul and take my dick, but you get the rest of me." he mumbled into her ear as he gently stroked her covered sides with his claws. "Yep, yep, lucky you, Loona Buckzo. In this complete package you get: the stupid jokes, the mushy kisses, the dirty shower fucking, and the hot knotty action in my giant fucking bed."

"Mmm...You're hers on paper only, basically on loan..?" Loona muttered as her tail wagged and she started to rub her paws over his arms. Yeah, Naruto figured she'd like coming to that conclusion; all Demons liked a bit of dominance in some regard. He kissed her cheek and ran his claws along the covered curves of her tight, toned stomach.

"Bingo, babe. As far as we're concerned, the Sin only gets to borrow me because otherwise we'd have to take on Lucifer's courts."

"Mm, fuck that."

"Preach, Loon."

AN: Again, "One Knuckleheaded Glutton" is officially on hiatus. I'm still plucking away at ch 64, but consider it on a seasonal break.

Anybutt, Steve, how are you today? ...Wha–Why is yogurt coming out of your...? ...We really need to find Me before I lose my mind.

Thanks for reading!