"How was last night," Teddy asked as Allison buckled Andy and Carly into the stroller.
"Theresa basically called me boring and lame," Allison whined, "I know I'm not exciting but seriously. To suggest I need a hobby."
"You have hobbies," Teddy said, "your gardens and all the stuff you do with what you grow. You volunteer and do advocacy work with the cerebral palsy foundation and the teen mom program. It just doesn't look like hers. It's not an excuse but I think she's really struggling and trying to find faults with others. She snapped at Annie the other day and Ellie said some rude things to Cat. Megan asked her to step out of the OR last week because of her attitude. And I don't know how to help all of you."
"Annie and I talked," Allison said, "we think she's jealous we have you and her mom is gone."
"So do I," Teddy replied, "I struggled with that when I was pregnant with you. I wanted my mom so bad and kept nana at an arms length. It didn't help that no one in my life had kids close in age. She could have great support in you and Ellie if she got her attitude in check."
"Can you say something to her," Allison asked, "I'm trying to be nice and I know how hard it is to be pregnant but she's unreasonable. It's not an excuse to be mean or rude."
"There's never an excuse to be mean or rude," Teddy agreed, "I'm trying to figure out how to say it in a kind way. I need to be the one to say it but I'm not sure how yet. I had your dad and Megan when you were born and Annie was sweet and supportive. She was so excited, your baby board book library was all your sister."
"How do we tell Theresa," Allison asked.
"Right now you can put some distance between you," Teddy suggested.
"That's what Annie suggested," Allison agreed as they walked the forested trail, "don't be overly warm but don't be rude. Let her come to me."
"Try it and if she asks be honest," Teddy replied, "you and Ellie have been spending a ton of time together and Ava."
"They get it," Allison replied, "and they're them. Does my French conversation group and book club count as a hobby?"
"I thought so," Teddy said, "my German one is one of my hobbies that I've always done. Yours are more social and community based. You don't do individual sit and be quiet hobbies."
"It's boring," Allison said, "she's criticizing me and she can't even make dinner. Leo does all their cooking. Mom she can't fry eggs."
"I was a terrible cook until you were born but I could do that," Teddy replied, "I was alone. I could do a couple scrambled eggs and toast with some fruit or veggies and call it a meal. I could follow a recipe and do basics. I could roast a chicken or turkey do classic comfort foods but I wasn't adventurous. I'd throw together a stir fry with what ever protein and veggies I had around and a jar of sauce. Annie and Jenna will always be our best cooks."
"Chris can," Allison said, "Ellie is really good so is Cat. Nisha is very middle eastern and Mediterranean flavors but she's excellent."
"I don't know if anyone ever taught Theresa," Teddy replied, "then she lived on campus through college and med school so she didn't have to cook she could use the dining hall."
"Doesn't mean she can be rude to me for enjoying it," Allison said, "or Annie or you about your baking. I like trying different things. I have a bunch of Moose from Chris that I want to try do moose Wellington."
"That sounds fun," Teddy said, "can we try it?"
"I was thinking I'd do it next week when we host Sunday dinner," Allison replied.
"I'm looking forward to it," Teddy smiled, "Allison don't worry about Theresa. She's doing a lot of sit alone hobbies because other than Leo who is she close to? What friends does she have here?"
"No one ," Allison said, "she's not exactly the most friendly at work."
"Have you tried to include her," Teddy asked.
"I do when I'm in ortho stuff in the main building but I'm usually in peds," Allison replied, "when she's brought into consult on a teen she just takes over. She tried to override Josh last week."
"Josh the head of peds," Teddy gasped, "she should know her chain of command."
"She acts like she's the only person who has done traumas her and Leo," Allison complained.
"Some of that is entry to civilian life after being in the army," Teddy replied, "what did Josh do?"
"Called her on it," Allison said, "told her to step back and take her hands out of the patient. This is a long term one Josh, Annie, Faroke and I have been doing staged surgeries on for two years after the school shooting and explosion in Tacoma. We have three more procedures to go. And two are plastics. Annie's fully done surgically just following up. Josh needs to remove the ostomy and I have one more procedure on the ribs before Faroke finishes the scar revisions."
"There's so much to be proud of in that work," Teddy smiled, "she hasn't had the chance to have the long term patients and the pride in that. She has a lot experience with quick fixes but not the pride of long term patients."
"Mom I can't stand her," Allison said, "in thought she was okay but I don't know now. Since they've been home she's been nothing but rude."
"I know," Teddy replied, "and you get the worst of it. I will speak to her this week. I need to figure out how. I never had to correct Josh about family things and ask him to change his behaviour with family like this. Sure I told him not to give you so many cookies or keep Leo up past his bed time but those were minor. And Asher was a teenager, living with us he needed direction and parenting. We grounded both of you."
"Because we were home 20 minutes late," Allison remembered, "your grounded us for a week, school, work and baby stuff."
"But it was easier to direct you two," Teddy said.
"We were young and needed direction and correction," Allison replied.
"I need to think," Teddy replied, "it's delicate. She's an adult and I'm her mother in law."
"I hate when Michelle has tried to tell me what to do," Allison agreed.
"Exactly," Teddy replied, "I can't just say it. I thought Megan and I modelled it but."
"What if I said something," Allison asked," she's comfortable saying what she wants and calling me pathetic."
"You could," Teddy replied, "but you should think carefully about what your going to say so you don't hurt her the way she hurt you."
"I know," Allison agreed.
At the hospital Annie paged Theresa to scrub in, "Dr Winquest are you going to do exactly what your asked?"
"I'm not a resident or a fellow," Theresa hissed.
"I put rank you as chief of cardio," Annie replied, "the patient being a cardio case. The chief of neuro will also be scrubbing in. Jenna and I are in charge. "
"They said you were the chill one," Theresa snapped.
"I'll page someone else dr Winquest," Annie said, "I don't need your services."
"Annie please," Theresa pleaded.
"No," Annie replied, "you and I will talk in my office after. I never got any favors as the chiefs daughter I never gave Allison any favors as a resident and I won't start with you. You earn it."
"Please," Theresa begged continuing to scrub, "Allison hates me I don't know anyone here other than Leo."
"You blew it with Allie," Annie stated, "you and I will talk after this surgery but you're not coming into my OR."
Theresa turned and walked off in a huff. Jenna joined Annie at the scrub sink.
"Now I get to discipline my sister in law," Annie groaned, "she's mean to Allie which I didn't expect and now she's disrespectful in the OR. Over riding me and Josh for no medical reason."
"I can," Jenna said.
"I have to," Annie groaned, "but I don't know what to say. It's so weird with my younger siblings in law. You were my friend before you were with Chris."
"And you've told me what you think before," Jenna said, "you knew I was pregnant with Tyler before Chris did."
"I knew about Everly first two," Annie said, "I was the one that read the blood work and told Allie."
"What will you do about Theresa," Jenna asked.
"I'm going to be blunt," Annie replied, "everyone is afraid to say it and I can be the bad guy. I hate when Josh's mom criticises me, I've learned to tune out Gloria but I hate it. It just instantly makes me angry, irrationally angry, my whole body shakes."
"And if Josh had a sister," Jenna asked, "you and I can disagree but we have our own relationship with out Chris."
"I don't mind being the bad guy here," Annie replied, "I can be honest with her instead of letting Mama do it. If I don't she will and it can't be her."
"If you're sure," Jenna said, "it could ruin your relationship with her."
"I know," Annie said, "but better me than Mama or Allie. Her and Allie have to be friends, Mama is her mother in law. I'm always in a weird spot with Leo and Allie and their relationships. And she's been rude to Ellie. Allie and Ellie could be great friends and supports for her with her babies."
"I've noticed her superiority complex," Jenna agreed, "we would have taken her down when we were residents, fellows or new attendings."
"I'll just talk to her," Annie replied.
After surgery Annie paged Theresa to her office.
"No coffee in the lounge," Theresa asked.
"I have your coffee," Annie said, "and a snack. I remember the pregnancy hunger."
"Why did you throw me out of the OR," Theresa asked.
"Because you don't know your chain of command here," Annie replied, "I am the chief of cardio. I out rank you. When you work on my very delicate paediatric cardiac patients I am in charge. That patient today Jenna and I have been working on for 9 years. We have been working with her since before you finished medical school. You came in guns blazing trying to take over. I asked you to meet me here because i'm going to say some things that I don't think you want to be public knowledge in the attendance lounge."
"What," Theresa asked.
"I have a few things to say but I don't know where my boundary is with you," Annie said, "some things I've noticed with you, Allie, Ellie and Cat. i know none of them are perfect and that they all have baby fever and it can be bad. I know how I would approach this if you were Jenna. I've always been in a weird spot with Leo and Allie, i'm more their aunt than their sister because of the age gap. I'm going to say a few things and you need to know I am saying them out of love and care for you."
"What," Theresa asked.
"I know things aren't smooth between you and the other girls your age at home," Annie said, "and I have my theories about why. I've also noticed you don't seem to be connecting with people here. I know you've had a lot of changes really fast. You have babies coming, you just left the army and are living with Leo for the first time and in his parents house. So it doesn't feel like yours."
"Yeah," Theresa shrugged.
"Okay," Annie said.
"Just say it," Theresa said.
"I'm worried about you," Annie said, "I see you having a hard time and I want to help. But you are pushing everyone away. You have a very narrow view of what people can or should do and little experience. Your experience of family from what o understand is very different from Leo's. From what you've said your family was slightly dysfunctional. You never met my mom or Jessica. That was dysfunctional. I've been there and been afraid to let people in and people love me."
"You," Theresa said.
"Jessica my other sister almost killed me when I was 19 and then two years later stabbed me with a steak knife," Annie explained, "she passed 25 years ago. My mom Leslie didn't know how to stop Jessica so let her do whatever to keep the peace. It was my fault in their eyes. Dan and Leslie divorced when I was 30. I was raised in a very conservative church with a lot of rules and backwards expectations. Theresa I understand needing time to adapt to family changes."
"But how did you do it," Theresa asked.
"A lot of therapy," Annie replied, "and learning to let people in. Mama first, then Steph Mitchell and Josh. But you can't take your discomfort and anxiety out on others. You don't get to be rude anywhere. Not here and not at home. I've heard how you talk to others. I'm not impressed. Allie and Ellie are trying to help you and be supportive and you make fun of them or brush them off. Allie loves being with her family and doing things to make them happy so do I. You need to do some growing, your views of what people can enjoy or how people have to be are narrow. What I see is someone who isn't sure where she fits in, is a bit scared about becoming a mom and is a little intimidated by your inlaws."
Theresa blushed and nodded.
Annie continued, " you need to be the one to make some choices before you alienate yourself from everyone but Leo. I'm aware of what has been said between you, Ellie and Allie. My daughter talks to me and so does my sister. I'm Allie's other sounding board, she has Mama and me for that. And you don't want Mama to have this conversation with you. Trust me it's the worst coming from your mother in law. You need to be kind, you do not have to agree with everyone or like what they like but you are going to be respectful and accept that they have things they like to do that you don't get. I don't get Allie's love of her garden or Mama's baking but it makes them happy and I enjoy the results. Mama has never understood Allie and I doing highland dance but has always encouraged us to because it makes us happy. I don't get why Leo likes to build his model trucks and do them to such a tiny scale but he enjoys it. I've never understood why Matt loves anime but he does and it's not hurting anyone. Heather is a great hip hop dancer, I hated that style and could never do it but I love watching her do it. Ellie paints, it's too slow for me but she's good and she painted the mountains in Ben's room herself from a photo of her favourite place. We don't all have to enjoy the same things. None of them enjoy making traditional metis food with me but everyone eats my tortier and bannock. "
"I wish people would talk about something other than the babies," Theresa said, "it's too much."
"We're all excited for you," Annie replied, "and you don't give us much else to talk about. You need to open up a bit. It's how every one is trying to connect with you. The being the center of attention can be alot. Only a few more weeks and you'll fade into the back ground and it'll all be on your babies. "
"It's weird the obsession with babies," Theresa said, "when I had ALiyana it wasn't talked about."
"When did you choose adoption," Annie asked.
"By 12 weeks," Theresa said.
"So you knew from the time you started telling people that you weren't keeping her," Annie said, "thats a different story then two very wanted babies."
"Unplanned and it's embarrassing," Theresa admitted.
"So were Henry and Heather," Annie replied, "Heather I didn't even realise it until 7 weeks then had a panic attack."
"But you were," Theresa said.
"A doctor, married, had two or three kids," Annie said, "in my mid 30s. Allie wasn't planned and Mama was 45! It doesn't matter."
"Is your mom judging," Theresa asked, "she's got this stellar record."
"She's had two of us unplanned," Annie said, "adopting Leo wasn't a planned thing. Tyler wasn't planned Chris and Jenna were just starting to date. Our family doesn't care."
"But a second time," Theresa said.
"With your fiance," Annie replied, "Josh and I had two. It's okay. We're not judging or upset about that. You and Leo love each other and are committed to each other. We are worried about how distant you are with others and how you're isolating yourself. Theresa if you keep pushing people away and don't have your support system your risk of postpartum depression and anxiety goes up exponentially. People are going to stop trying, people are here. Patience with you is wearing thin. You're not wanted as the ortho consult because you don't work well with others. You see your coworkers as the troops you command and that's not the case. I see two problems with two different approaches but you're going to relax. You need to chill."
"But," Theresa said.
"Here you are going to learn to be a team player," Annie said, "you are going to be part of the team and suggest, discuss treatment plans. This isn't a field hospital you have colleagues to talk to theres more than you for ortho. We have resources. You don't have to charge ahead with the quick fix you can take your time. For the next two weeks here your job is to watch what the teams are doing, watch how the the teams talk to eachother and the collaboration. Grey Sloan is a collaborative place. You came in here trying to take over and it's not appreciated. You need to back off, watch and try to slowly slide into teams and surgeries."
"And at home," Theresa asked.
"Stop shutting the others your age down,"Annie directed, "open up and share more about you. Talk about your feeling. You can set boundaries, we're good with boundaries."
Annie's page buzzed in her pocket. She pulled it out and glanced at it.
"I have to go to the peds er," Annie said, "crush injuries to the chest. Must be bad if it's me and Jenna. I'm willing to give you a shot to watch our team work and we will ask you to step in when needed. Be our fellow. Can you do that?"
"I can," Theresa pouted.
"Attitude," Annie warned.
"I'll try," Theresa agreed.
"Okay let's go," Annie said.
Annie texted Teddy while they waited for the elevator, "I talked to Theresa hopefully things improve. Better from me than you."
Teddy, "thanks. That's not easy."
Annie, "it isn't but major trauma talk to you later just gowning."