Little asteracée nibbles scales
Last light, first drumbeats, electric lights off, and the lanterns of children too young to be trainers gathered in the main square. Ash and Pancham watched them from the Center hall while Braixen settled accounts with Sylveon.
"But he helped you find your gift after all," the fairy type defended herself.
"He mostly took advantage of me," the vixen grumbled, "and you know very well that I don't blame you for that!"
Braixen looked like Serena when she bent over like that with her fists on her hips, and both Ash and Pancham were glad not to be the target of the day.
"They're coming!"
The panda had shouted loudly enough on purpose to get Braixen's attention. Braixen grumbled a little more before finally making her way to the window to watch the two latecomers arrive. Plusle was the first to enter, but in what state? Electric arcs kept forming on his sweat-soaked coat, his numb muscles struggling to keep his body upright as he staggered from side to side, squeaking:
"I can't feel my cheeks! I can't feel my cheeeeeeks!"
Pancham tried to support him, but the shocks he received forced him backwards. He watched helplessly as the positive pokemon fell to the ground, articulating weakly:
"We spent hours on it. Hours and hours of non-stop attacks!"
His brother followed behind. He was not in much better shape, but he still seemed to be able to walk, held together by stupor.
"Dim lights, dim lights," he repeated. "Actually, they wanted Zapdos in pokemon to provide the accompaniment."
"Aren't you exaggerating a bit?" grumbled Braixen, still annoyed by her misadventure.
Besides, they were showing off this morning with their gift from the forest, they weren't so proud now!
"You're so ruthless," Pancham said, sounding disgusted.
She let out an indignant scream. Who had sent her into this dark forest? Whose fault was it that Serena had spent a good hour cleaning her coat of mud, leaves and needles? There was only one ruthless pokemon here, and it certainly wasn't her!
"Let's calm down," Ash quickly interjected. "The parade will be leaving soon, we'd better warn Serena that everyone's back instead of arguing, what do you say?"
Braixen growled at the panda one last time before finally turning to the kitchens to fetch some water for the rabbits.
" I'll leave you in charge of Serena?" Pancham asked.
Ash had seen her at the videophone corner a while ago, consulting the trainer's register. She must be trying to find out where May was and maybe she was talking to her right now. Who knew, if he hurried he could say hello to his friend.
"Are you sure you're going to be okay?" asked Ash.
The panda puffed out his cheek, annoyed that the former trainer didn't trust him more to take care of the two brothers.
"Well, yeah, there's no reason it should be any worse than usual."
"Are you sure?" the reptile swallowed.
Pancham blinked several times, unable to understand why the shapeshifter looked so horrified.
"Are you so afraid of being alone with her?" the panda sighed, crossing his arms.
A few flames escaped the shapeshifter's grasp as he stepped back, his scales glowing a beautiful scarlet.
"It's not that! Well, it's true that I've been feeling a little... different lately," he squeaked. "Anyway, the problem here isn't me, it's you who's risking..."
"'Yeah, yeah," the panda pretended, already pushing the dragon towards where the girl was. "Don't worry about me, I'll be fine."
Ash seemed to hesitate for a moment, then, seeing the panda's determination and incredible courage, decided to trust him.
"Well then... Good luck with Braixen."
Kecleons had better watch out, because Pancham had just turned white from eartip to pawtip in less than a thousandth of a second.
"Braixen? Yes, Braixen, of course Braixen," he chattered, searching his fur for a leaf. "She shouldn't have time to... Ah ah, it's getting hot in here," he hiccupped.
Only this time it wasn't the reptile's fault, because he had already left. With sweaty hands, Pancham rolled his painkiller between his fingers without deciding to take a bite.
"Sylveon..." he begged in a low voice.
But she already approached Minun, who was standing against a wall. If she was hurrying, it was obviously because she was worried about him, not because the vixen had a score to settle with her! She put a ribbon in front of her face and thanked the panda in a prayer for his sacrifice when she heard him stutter:
"Braixen, don't bother carrying the glass, I'll... N-No, I haven't forgotten that we need to talk. In fact, we'll do it right now, a good talk between friends, because that's what we are: friends! And of course, friends don't get into fisticuffs, let alone fists, especially not with Fire Blast.
Sylveon resented leaving her comrade like that, and was about to turn to help when she heard a faint whimper:
"Did you find anything?"
She hadn't expected Minun to care about her. Plusle often played the role of mediator, even more so after what had happened at Mount Chimney, so they rarely spoke directly to each other.
"Wait, Braixen! Please! No! No, no, no, I beg you! Not my leaf! Not my leaf!" Pancham shouted from behind her.
"Serena helped me a little, but in the end I think I'm glad," she explained.
"All the better," the newcomer rejoiced, pressing his forehead against the wall.
He started to scrape the floor with his foot, then turned to her before stopping abruptly, as if he'd been cut off by Fake Out.
"Minun, you'll swallow volbeats if you keep your mouth open too long. Although that wouldn't be so bad," Plusle grinned, still lying down.
The stung blue rabbit tried to retort, but was caught off guard. Sylveon caught him just in time and helped him to regain his balance.
"What I really wanted to tell you," he ventured, "you might think it's a bit silly, especially after all this time, but I still haven't... well, you know."
"Very clear indeed," Plusle commented with a yawn.
Minun stamped his foot, reminding his brother that it was complicated enough without him adding to it.
"Yes, you know, well..." he continued, staring at the tips of his paws. "Ash has been paying more attention to Serena lately."
Sylveon tilted her head to the side, and the blue rabbit resented losing her even more.
"It's not that he never paid attention to her!" he corrected. "It's just that before, it was like he was helping her, but through him, and I think I was doing the same thing. Aaaah! That still doesn't make any sense! What I'm trying to explain is that I saw other pokemons through me in the same way that Ash saw Serena through him, whereas if we look at them through them, well, the others, well, not me, but... Why is that so hard to explain!"
He felt a warm link slide against his back and was surprised by the amused smile the fairy type gave him.
"I think I understand," she breathed.
"R-Really?" the blue rabbit swallowed.
"Well... You know, when Ash turned into a pokemon, the first thing he wanted to do for Serena was help her win a contest."
"Ah, that, Braixen never misses a chance to tell how much he screwed up," the rabbit recalled.
"But what he did wasn't necessarily bad, it's just... He must have felt it was the right thing to do, because it worked for him."
The little pokemon grimaced, a few sparks dying on his cheeks, a sign of his discomfort.
"I also thought that the Ash who always believed in Serena was the best," she continued, "the one who would succeed in cheering her up no matter what, until..."
"The volcano," Minun breathed.
She nodded, her ears drooping at the painful memory.
"That he should resent her, that he should get angry when she needed him most, I thought was completely unfair... I just didn't realize how much it would have been too much for her to bear."
A light fairy wind had risen around her, accompanying the twitching of her ribbons, swollen from the anger she'd felt at that moment. But they finally subsided as she explained:
"If he had behaved like he did in Kalos, Serena would have tried to live up to his vision of her, the trainer who could keep going no matter what, the one who never gave up..."
"It amounted to pushing her further when she'd already stumbled," the blue completed, staring at the fairy type.
"Yes. Even if it was supposed to bring out the best in her, it would only destroy her in the end."
"Because he wouldn't have tried to see or understand what was going on," Minun muttered. "It would have been easier if Serena had become what he wanted her to be. But in the end, he was able to pay attention."
The blue rabbit looked to where the dragon had gone. The strong and powerful Charizard who had discovered a sudden passion for cooking, the one who had questioned his blind faith in fighting, the one who simply wanted to better understand the one who wasn't him. Maybe that was why he seemed so attentive to her lately, much more so than when he'd proclaimed he'd do anything to encourage her in competitions.
"You were really amazing against Archie."
Sylveon tensed, bringing all her ribbons in front of her as she stammered:
"N-No, actually, you don't know this, but I wanted to... I wasn't..."
"That's okay. It must have been terrifying, and yet you stayed while I..." He shook his head, dark circles under his eyes. "It was you, Sylveon. It was you who was there, who is there. And it doesn't matter that I'm an idiot who broods about not being strong enough, who wants everything to be his fault so he forgets that others can doubt too, feel weak or useless. It must have been hard, so hard, and all I could think of was to tell you, all I could think of..."
The little monster's crying didn't stop, nor did the big tears rolling down his cheeks. And Sylveon, completely panicked, seeing that Plusle couldn't - or wouldn't - help, clumsily tried to comfort the rabbit when all she could do was... rub her cheek against the sparks, spread her aura, calm the sobs and be there. Yes, be there.
"Sorry..." the rabbit chuckled.
She lowered her head, letting him stare at the knot on her ear, that tangle of ribbons that looked like the wings of a beautifly, unless it was one of those famous vivillons the others sometimes mentioned. It may look solid, but it doesn't take much to make it fly away, his brother had said mischievously. Oh... Don't tell him it was really Plusle the elder to figure it all out so quickly. Minun wiped his snotty nose and puffed out his chest, but unfortunately his voice didn't get any firmer and his "thank you" sounded like a funny cross between a nasal and a deflating balloon.
And if he had any doubts about the pathetic nature of his performance, Plusle soon confirmed it with a burst of laughter. The blue waddled on the spot, annoyed at not being able to escape to his favorite perch: the shapeshifter's shoulder. All he could do to defend himself was stick out his tongue.
"Bad player," Plusle chuckled. "Well, even if it took you a while, at least you got there," he chattered, his eyes half closed.
"Always up to mischief," Sylveon sighed.
"You've seen how annoying he is," Minun agreed. "And just think, I've put up with him for years."
"It's terrible," she joked in a falsely apologetic tone.
"Yes, absolutely horrible and awful," the blue despaired.
"Uh oh, you know my ears aren't long for pretty."
But his annoyance was swallowed by a big yawn. His batteries were too low to take revenge on his brother, and the fairy-like waves that soothed his aches and pains gradually lulled him to sleep. The three of them were fine, glued together, their smiles in unison, nothing to disturb them.
"Please, someone. I really, REALLY need help!"
No, really nothing. Nor would the panda's frightened cries reach the trainer, who was too preoccupied with what she could find on the center's computer, or rather, the lack of anything she could find on a particular trainer.
Serena moved the mouse again to make sure her eyes weren't playing tricks on her, but soon had to face the facts: not a single new entry in Ash's trainer file since the Kalos League. It didn't bother her that the page only listed victories in gyms or placements in tournaments large and small, but the former finalist in Kalos' greatest competition hadn't defeated a single leader in all that time. Even in Galar, known for the difficulty of its Gym Challenge, she believed he was more than capable of winning a single badge. He had vanished into thin air, as if he'd given up his training career. You know Ash is more likely to be abducted by aliens than to give up training, she reasoned.
She switched her search to the phone book. Ash's mother wouldn't mind her calling to check on her son, and more importantly, she could explain why Ash had suddenly disappeared from the competition. Special training perhaps? "M", "M", "N", he had isolated himself on I don't know what mountain to improve. Maybe he's really, really sick! No, there's no point in imagining the worst, just try... Here we are! Professor Oak. He should be able to tell me Delia's number if he doesn't already have information about Ash.
"Char?"
Serena gasped, her ear tickled by the dragon's breath as he brought his nose close to the screen.
"Is it time to go?" she asked. He nodded, a little disappointed to see only the pages of the phone book. "Do I still have some time?"
Ash thought he detected some nervousness in the girl, as if she was begging him to say yes. Unfortunately, the procession had already sounded the trumpet when he came to get her.
"Char, charichar, chari," he explained.
It also meant that it was late, so there was little chance that anyone would be in the lab. She sighed and put on her cloak, but she would have to wait until tomorrow to get to the bottom of this.
"Char, Zard?"
"I didn't find what I was looking for," she admitted, "I'll try to find out tomorrow."
His trainer seemed more surprised than panicked, which reassured Ash. May must have lost a contest, which wasn't good news, but nothing to worry about, especially since her friend from Hoenn had always been able to bounce back from defeat. Still, the former human could understand Serena's surprise, she who only knew the experienced, confident coordinator.
"Try to enjoy the party anyway," he breathed.
Once again, the girl's heart was consumed. Ash was disappearing, and her first reaction to keep her footing was to cling to the fire pokemon. It was a weight she did not want to put on the dragon's shoulders, no matter how much he wanted it.
"Charizard, promise me that you will not spend the evening worrying about me."
"Zar..."
"I've been relying on you a lot lately, and just because you're my pokemon doesn't mean you have to put up with everything."
"Chari, char!"
"I know you don't mind. But what I'm trying to make you understand is that sometimes it can be bad, really bad," she grimaced, feeling her heart quicken.
Outside, cymbals, drums, trumpets, and horns called to join them. But Ash wanted to support her, to improve himself for her, and when he approached to tell her so, she gently but firmly pushed him away.
"There are things I cannot and must not dump on you."
"Chari, Charichar?" he grumbled.
For the first time, she looked away, her cheeks flushed as she answered:
"I've been feeling... strange lately, and Brendan helped me understand why."
"Char!" cried Ash.
What did the boy have to do with this conversation? Especially when it was about May, the former human felt much more entitled to give advice.
"You're a pokemon!" she asserted. "You... There are things too complex for you, and it's not a question of intelligence, it's just..." Serena caught her breath, it was hard to see the pained look on her pokemon's face and she knew her words were harsh, but she had to say them, for his sake as well as hers: "These are ideas, stupid human behaviors that wouldn't even occur to you. That's why I needed Brendan's human perspective to solve the problem."
"Charichar!"
Ash regretted that roar in the second that followed. Not because she'd backed away, not because he'd frightened her, but because he'd said, "Me too," he'd roared: "Me too." Oh... maybe he really was jealous of Brendan, of this trainer who dreamed of becoming a Master, of this boy who could talk to Serena so easily, share his ideas without her hearing grunts. Me too, me too when I'm human again... His heart sank. The only image that came to mind, vibrating with truth and cruelty, was that of a Pikachu trainer on the road, arguing that he was never alone because his pokemons were there. It was enough that pokemons were there for him not to feel alone.
"You... Repeat that," the girl stammered.
"The others will be angry with us if we delay any longer."
"Wait! Please, wait! I didn't understand, I didn't understand what you were saying and... please repeat it just once, just one last time!"
He thought he would shake, that his voice would freeze, but it flowed, clear and crisp. You never lied to her?
"I'm your pokemon, that's why I'm with you."
And indeed, his grunts had never rung so blatantly true.
The procession was long gone by the time they left the center, and they had to run back to it, an effort too great for the two rabbits, who ended up dozing in the reptile's arms.
It was hard to believe that a big dragon like him could show such kindness to the two rabbits, but Serena was no longer surprised. In fact, she was convinced of it: anyone who spent a little time with him would understand how safe he made you feel, and cross out the word terrifying... She clutched the lantern tighter to her chest. No, he hadn't scared her right then, not really. Her fingers brushed the bamboo frame, as if to make sure nothing was broken and everything was in place.
It wasn't the fact that he had screamed, or even the few flames that had escaped him, it wasn't even a sense of danger from the monster capable of melting rock with his breath, it was just what he had said to her. Something that had scared the life out of her, something her whole being had understood as she felt her muscles tense and her stomach knot, but she, Serena, still couldn't make sense of it.
"Brendan?" she worried.
He was staring at Charizard, but not in the way she'd expected. He could have been surprised, neutral or even touched, which she would have understood, but this way of looking at him, as if trying to see beyond what he was - a pokemon, nothing more - brought Serena back to her own unease.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"No, nothing."
Why did she give up the possibility of an answer so quickly? The young girl watched the pokemon's face for a few seconds before quickly looking away. It was... She'd rejected it. She had understood what it had said at the time, but she had rejected it immediately, and even now, as she tried to remember, her memory seemed to be under the yoke of her reason, which told her that it was impossible, and that what was impossible was not worth remembering.
"Do you trust Charizard?" asked Brendan.
Serena stayed without answering for a while, dazed by the boy's casual, relaxed tone, as she could no longer tell up from down in her mind. But it gave her something to hold on to, and now all her concentration, all her abilities were focused on answering, on shouting:
"Of course!"
Of course she trusted him! If she didn't, flying on his back would be unimaginable! Then it was true that she'd been avoiding it lately. The dizziness was to blame, though she didn't try too hard to fight it, using any excuse to stay on the ground. He doesn't ask for it anymore, either, she thought. She remembered that the reptile had insisted on flying to the contest site and leaving Brendan behind, but his requests had stopped since... well, since the boy had punched him in the nose for no reason at all. At least he regretted his gesture, although it was more because she'd gotten angry than out of any real remorse for hurting the pokemon. In any case, after this episode, Serena had seriously reconsidered her opinion of the trainer.
"Braix!"
Small cube-shaped lanterns floated on the lake, while paper egrets fluttered in the air along the shore. Serena took a deep breath, the party was just around the corner, and except for Charizard and Sylveon, who had given her their presents early, the others must have been eager to reveal theirs. She couldn't receive them while thinking about Ash, Charizard's opaque words or even Brendan's attitude.
"Mi, Minun, Min!" the rabbit cried as he freed himself from the reptile's arms.
Wax scented the atmosphere as volbeats and illumises joined in the celestial ballet, hopping between the lanterns. Minun rubbed his cheeks, trying to stimulate the electrons running through them, only to produce a small spark barely stronger than static electricity. He turned to his brother, but the pokemon did no better, still too exhausted to even stand.
"It's not fair..." the pokemon murmured, then raised his snout to the violent flash and shouted, "It's not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair!"
Nearly bursting into tears, a hand came to rest on his head and slid down his back.
"Did you organize this?"
The pokemon's lip quivered. The dancers had come, and their show was enough to please the trainers, but it had to be more, so much better, if only he could throw his damned lightning! Serena suddenly grabbed him to give him some height.
"I know it's not as good as Charizard's head, but you should be able to see better from here."
It was painful. To see how beautiful it was even without them, to see that people were content with it, to learn that the extraordinary they could have brought was not necessary.
"It's not so bad," the blue rabbit admitted.
After all, he could stay here with Serena and the others, admiring the fake stars with them and telling himself that it was finally here, closest to his trainer, enjoying the pride of having been able to amaze her.
"Not bad, but I've got better, much better!" boasted Pancham as he hopped onto his trainer's shoulder.
Proudly, he pulled a bamboo branch out of his coat, and when Minun was about to say that there was nothing unusual about it, he fell silent when he saw the leaves glowing a beautiful pink color. The panda grinned mischievously as he slipped the branch through the girl's fingers. At home, it was customary to give this gift to the group leader, a powerful pangoro whom Serena envied nothing, especially when she was angry.
Braixen stepped forward with a wrapped leaf in her hand. The girl unwrapped the contents and the fox waddled over. It wasn't as visually appealing as the little monsters' gifts, but Ursaring had assured her that by mixing honey with a few other elements and heating it, she would get a product that would make her fur silkier.
"Oh!" The girl understood. "It wouldn't be..."
"XenBraix," the pokemon nodded.
Pancham and the others pokemons were skeptical of the viscous substance, but the girl's pupils sparkled as she muttered conspiratorially:
"I'll try it as soon as we get home."
"Try what, exactly?" asked Pancham.
Serena twisted a lock of hair around her finger, feeling the brittleness she'd inherited from these weeks of depression and constant vigilance. Caring for it, restoring its luster, a small thing, ridiculous and yet so important for the young girl to feel fully herself.
She hugged the vixen, her first pokemon that knew her so well, that resembled her, that was her closest friend... Charizard approached, lantern in hand. He wasn't her first pokemon, he didn't look like her, and something stopped her from calling him a friend. When she saw him, her first thought was different. Different from all of her pokemons, different from everything she felt for her pokemons.
"Hold it," he said.
Serena felt the paper crumple in her hands as the pokemon approached the flame with the tip of his tail. The trainer was afraid that the paper and bamboo circles she had so painstakingly assembled would go up in flames, but he contented himself with brushing the burner.
He, too, needed to distract himself, and what better way than to watch the miniature balloon inflate, a reminder of the Kanto festivals of his childhood. Ash could see the flame dancing through the paper, but he couldn't see the red face of the girl, who could only think of the scales and claw tips holding her hands. When he finally let go of the lantern and she imitated him, when he followed the rice paper bell with his gaze and she couldn't let go of his face, the trainer brought both hands to her heart and felt the warmth of the ribbon Ash had given her and which she no longer dared to wear on the collar of her outfit. Without thinking, she untied it, concentrating on the reptile's features and the pokemon's gentle smile. The same smile as Ash! Exactly the same!
"Chari?"
She gasped, suddenly realizing that the ribbon had left her wrist. Trembling, she raised her hand to discover what had surprised her pokemon: there it was, Ash's gift, tied to her hair.
"I'm... I'm going to see Brendan!"
She had to call the Pallet Town trainer, no matter where he was or what he was doing, because it was getting urgent, really urgent!
"Brendan!"
Serena ran to the boy kneeling by the water. She apologized in advance for bothering him with her problems, but he was her only escape, the only one who understood... She froze as he turned to face her. His gaze was somber, and even the light reflected in his pupils seemed to fade, to die in a kind of abyss, to fall off the cliff of his irises.
"Need help lighting your lantern?" he asked.
"Charizard showed me how," she hurried to answer. "And I wanted to know what you've been up to on your side, and... have you made a floating lantern, too?"
The boy's fingers dipped into the icy water for a few seconds.
"I made it for myself, I guess."
Brendan swallowed his saliva over and over, as if trying to moisten his good-humored throat, which he succeeded in doing when he said:
"Your pokemon is smarter than it looks, but then again, with you as a trainer, that's hardly surprising. By the way, that ribbon in your hair looks nice."
She hid the blue link under her hand, still wondering what had possessed her to do such a thing, but not wanting to put it back on her wrist.
"I'm not sure it's me," she confessed, "he always... sometimes knows things without me knowing where or how he learned them."
A lantern burst into flames. Caught, the paper withered and fell toward the retina, already disrupted by hundreds of phosphenes.
"The Mysteries of Pokemons," he quoted as if he were an old researcher. "And by the way, were you able to contact your friend?"
The hiss of the lantern caught in the cold, its gurgling agony, Ash couldn't hear it, so preoccupied was he with the boy's last words.
"Here, Charizard!" Brendan greeted him.
The young girl tensed, sensing that the dragon's silence meant nothing good.
"We were talking about a trainer I met in Kalos," she decided to explain. "I wanted to contact him, but... he's busy at the moment."
Ash's eyes widened. Did she mean Professor Sycamore? But Serena had said trainer, so... one of her performers friends! No, still not. Oh, she'd met plenty of trainers : Alain, Tierno, Sawyer. That was it! She was talking about Clemont, of course, so it was only natural that she wanted to contact the inventor and have a chat with Bonnie.
Reassured, the paper floated on the surface of the pond as Brendan smiled. Friendly, really friendly, maybe too friendly.
"Serena hasn't been feeling well lately," he explained. "We thought it might be because she missed that boy."
"Zard!" the monster choked.
"Well, old boy, you don't look too good," Brendan laughed. "Is it the idea that there might be a rival out there far more dangerous than me?"
He had his arm around the girl's shoulders, and she immediately pulled away.
"Brendan! I'm not amused!" she shouted, her face completely red.
The weaves, remnants of the celestial corpse, scanned the other lanterns, biding their time until they flared up again. It's Ash she's talking about. His saliva resembled the sand of the Desert Resort, and the flames lingering at the back of his throat made him thirsty. Tomorrow. She's calling Ash tomorrow. She's calling me tomorrow!
Notes : I tried to limit the shopping list aspect of the gift-giving part, but it still feels a bit ^^'.
So, if you're wondering why I waited for Serena to call Ash, it was to let Ash know that she was going to contact him and build up all the stress that comes with xp (and also to add a bit of lore to the universe: I had fun thinking about how trainers manage to contact each other when they don't have cell phones and are always on the move).