Learning To Swim

Chapter Twelve: The Reason

Peepers and Wander are face to face once more. Let's see how that goes!

Thank you to everyone who read and/or commented on my last chapter. I always love hearing what you think of my story! I think I'm getting a little more comfortable writing for Peepers, but he's still the hardest of the four for me to get in his headspace.

See you at the bottom!

"So, you're probably pretty pleased with yourself, aren't you?"

Wander paused, putting down the curly fry he'd been munching on. He'd slapped the moustache back on when the waiter brought their food, growling exaggeratedly until he left. Peepers still couldn't believe how effective it was, and it was a little bizarre to see the peaceful space hippy growling and glaring and puffing up with rage, as ridiculous and over the top as that rage was. It was at least a brief distraction from his miserable thoughts, but with Wander being the cause of those thoughts, the distraction was very temporary.

"Why would I be?" Wander blinked across at Peepers, seeming genuinely curious. Peepers glared in response. There was no way Wander didn't know what he was talking about. That had to be an act.

"Because of what you're doing to Hater," he clarified, eye twitching slightly as he emphasized the words. He held up a hand to forestall any response. "And I know you said it's not a 'trick' and you 'meant' it. That doesn't matter! You're still changing him, trying to soften him up and make him into a good guy, and I won't believe you don't know you're doing it."

Wander paused, seeming to think for a minute.

"It's not really something I'm doin'," he said hesitantly after a moment.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Wander spread his hands out, palms open.

"Well, it's jus' something that's happenin' between us, that's all."

"And you actually expect me to believe that?"

Wander chuckled softly, eyes sliding away from Peepers and out into the bar where the minion tester could be heard starting up again in the background. When his eyes found Peepers again, he was smiling, but it looked a little sad.

"I can't make ya believe me, Mr. Peepers." Another pause, in which Peepers started feeling uncomfortable under Wander's oddly serious gaze. When Wander spoke again, his voice was quiet, contemplative. "D'ya think it's bad if Hater changes?"

Peepers gaped for a moment, the casual way the question was asked catching him somehow off guard.

"It…of course it's bad!" he snapped, hands clenching below the surface of the table. "It's a serious blow for evil and villainy and the spread of darkness across the galaxy! Isn't that why you've been trying to change him all along?"

"What about Hater?"

Peepers blinked, confused.

"What about Hater?"

"Is it bad fer him?"

It took Peepers a second to process the question, and then he glared across at the nomad.

"Of course it is," he said again. "You want to change him into someone else. Someone stupid and joyful and completely flarping harmless. He won't even be him anymore."

"Well now, that's just silly." Wander was smiling a little now and Peepers' glare darkened in contrast. "I like Hatey. Why would I wanna do that? I'd still like him even if he never changed. I'm not trying ta change him, jus' help him ta be happy. 'Sides, changin' a bit's not gonna make 'im inta someone else. We all change a little as we learn an' grow. Doesn't mean he's any less him than before."

"Ugh, this is getting us nowhere!" Peepers glared out at the main bar, grabbing his glass and taking an angry gulp.

"'S that why ya left? You don't want Hater ta change?" Wander's voice sounded sad again, but Peepers refused to look at him. His glare darkened. It sounded stupid when Wander said it like that.

"It's not that simple," he muttered, still glaring down into his glass like it held all the answers he needed to make the stupid fluff-ball go away. He sensed Wander nod encouragingly out of the corner of his eye and his hand tightened on the glass.

Why was he bothering to explain himself to the furry pain anyway? It was his fault all of this was happening, as he must be aware. How was explaining his reasoning to the inane space hick going to help anything anyway? Yet, he still somehow felt compelled to do so, to justify his actions, to himself, if not necessarily to Wander.

"Hater used to amazing," he said quietly after a moment, giving Wander a piercing look across the table. "I'm sure you remember. He was the most respected villain in the galaxy with hundreds of planets under his control. He struck fear into the hearts of millions. And he was passionate; excited and driven to conquer the galaxy. I couldn't plan invasions fast enough for him." He paused, letting out a sigh as he flicked his glass with one finger.

"Now look at him. He's mocked relentlessly by other villains, his planet count is constantly falling, and he's barely interested in expanding the empire; falls asleep during my briefings half the time, and whenever we do manage to go and try to conquer a planet, you're there." His eye narrowed on Wander's face. The nomad was watching him seriously without a hint of a smile, and that somehow made it easier to continue. "And now, he doesn't even hate you anymore," Peepers bit out, feeling the harsh truth in the words as he said them. "That was the one thing I thought would never change."

Wander looked sad again, and Peepers didn't want to think that he might be sympathizing with him. He didn't want the annoying hairball doing that. Maybe he'd said too much, admitted too much to his enemy. Only a few days ago he would have adamantly refused to admit how much the frustrating orange headache had changed Hater, the extent to which the overlord had fallen from his previous impressive height. Maybe admitting it had been easier because he was no longer fighting it. He'd quit his position as Hater's commander and left the overlord to face off against the furry menace on his own.

It didn't matter what he admitted to Wander anymore. It wouldn't do him any good to pretend it hadn't happened. Wander was going to win anyway.

Wander clasped his hands together, resting his chin on top of them. He was still looking steadily across at Peepers, and the watchdog shifted uncomfortably. He wasn't used to Wander being so…focused.

"Ya know, Hatey's never been tha best at talkin' about his feelings, or even bein' honest about what he's feelin' to himself."

Peepers rolled his eye. He should have known Wander was going to avoid what he'd just said.

"Yes, I'm quite aware," he agreed dismissively.

Wander nodded as though affirming something to himself.

"The two o' you've been friends for a long time," he said.

Peepers almost started to correct him, 'friends' wasn't how he or Hater had ever defined their relationship, but he decided to let it be. Wander seemed to think everyone was friends, and arguing the point was probably useless.

"Long enough," he said instead, eye narrowing suspiciously again on Wander's face. He wondered where the fuzzy mop was going with this. He didn't trust the direction the conversation seemed to be taking.

"Then ya must know that he's missin' you."

Ah.

Peepers leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms and peering at Wander from under his hat.

"Oh sure," he scoffed. "He's probably missing having someone to yell at and disregard, someone whose brilliant, detailed plans he can pick apart and complain about and someone who organizes and keeps the skull-ship running. I don't see why any of that is a reason that I should come back."

"I didn't say it was." Wander's voice was still serious, and Peepers had the distinct impression there was something he was supposed to be understanding in the nomad's tone and the way he tilted his head. "An' if that's all ya think he's missing, then you probably shouldn't go back. You deserve better'n that, Mr. Peepers."

Peepers bristled at that, though he wasn't entirely sure why.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" he snapped, frustration suddenly boiling over as he glared at the furry freak. "This is probably exactly what you wanted. Get me to take myself out of the picture so you can have Hater all to yourself and comfort him in his 'hour of need,' right?"

"D'ya really think I'd want that, Mr. Peepers?"

Wander's quiet voice was like a pin popping the balloon of Peepers' indignation. He gave a frustrated sigh, leaning his head back on the cushioned side of the booth to stare at the high ceiling. Even he couldn't pretend Wander would wish ill on anyone, even a villain.

"No, but only because you're an idiot."

Wander chuckled at that, not looking the least bit offended. He leaned forward, somehow meeting Peepers' gaze again so that the watchdog couldn't look away.

"He does miss you, ya know," he said quietly. "An' not just 'cause of all that stuff you just said. Hatey may not show it, but you're one o' the mos' important people in the universe ta him."

Just not as important as you.

The thought came out of nowhere, and Peepers didn't say the words out loud, but they still seemed to resonate in the air between them, and he was certain Wander knew what he was thinking. Suddenly his throat felt uncomfortably tight, and he forced himself to look away from the nomad and out into the rest of the bar, though he couldn't see much through the blurriness in his eye.

The truth of that thought practically took his breath away. It hadn't occurred to him before, but that was part of what made all this so hard for him to bear, the knowledge that, no matter what he did, how effective and supportive a commander he was to Hater, he would never matter as much as Wander. Hater had always put Wander first, even when he was trying to kill the furry pain, and the destruction ceremony had just been the first time Peepers had really realized that. Hater had pushed aside their own plans for Boomapalooza just because Wander had shown up because, despite his ambitions and his desire for power, Wander would always come first, before the conquering, and before Peepers.

And despite how ineffectual Hater's attempts to destroy Wander had been, while that had been his drive, Peepers had stuck with him, through all the ridiculous disruptions, captures and constant pandemonium the pest caused. Despite it all, he'd still held out a small hope, a thought in the back of his head, that if Hater ever succeeded in killing the little nomad, things would finally go back to normal. They'd be free of Wander, and able to get back to conquering the galaxy together.

But now he knew that was never going to happen.

Hater no longer wanted to destroy Wander. He wanted to date him instead, and that meant Wander was never going away, and Hater was never going to get over him.

Peepers sat there; eye unseeing as he wrestled painfully with his feelings. He couldn't find anything to say.

Wander, mercifully, was quiet.

Lord Hater had had better days.

Yesterday, in fact. Yesterday had been a significantly better day, even with Sylvia pressuring him into an uncomfortable conversation and Peepers complaining and kidnapping Wander against his specific orders.

He'd had a really nice time, gotten to actually use one of his smooching rooms for smooching, even if it hadn't been quite as much smooching as he'd planned on, and he was actually dating someone now; someone weird and goofy and sometimes annoying, but someone he actually, well, wanted to date. He and Wander were dating. He still had a hard time believing it.

Today had been another story altogether.

He'd never in his wildest dreams imagined that Peepers would quit. Sure, he knew the watchdog was frustrated with everything that was happening with Wander. Hater could even kind of understand where he was coming from.

Wander used to be his most hated enemy, and even he wasn't sure when that designation had changed in his mind. Peepers still certainly saw the nomad that way, as an obstacle to their conquering, and he probably still was. That was a lot to adjust to. Hater had known Peepers was upset about him and Wander getting together, and about being yelled at last night, and had expected an emotional outburst of some kind this morning, but to just leave? Without even saying a word?

It was insulting, that's what it was. It was like the watchdog was completely disregarding all the years they'd spent together; all they'd done to build up the Lord Hater Empire from when it was just the two of them cruising around in a banged up van bullying random losers on different planets. It was like he was disregarding Hater.

Hater knew he wasn't always the most considerate boss. It kind of came with the territory of being an evil galactic conqueror. He put down his subordinates, yelled at them and ignored their feelings. When they disappointed him, he made them regret it. All of that was just part of being a galactic villain. You had to show your minions they were worth less than you, keep their morale down so they didn't get too happy and consequently think they started deserving rights or free time or any of that junk.

His relationship with Peepers was, well, a little different, he supposed, especially lately. Peepers would sometimes even berate him for his lack of focus or his obsession with Wander, which none of his other watchdogs would dare to do. But Hater was still solidly in charge, and he'd always figured that when push came to shove, Peepers would go along with his decisions, even if he grumbled or complained about them.

Apparently, he'd been wrong.

Hater growled to himself, crossing his arms and slumping onto the hard wood of a park bench. He'd checked all the planets on his list with no sign of his commander. All that had happened had been a lot of screaming and running whenever he landed the skull-ship, and then he'd had to conduct his search while the inhabitants dove out of his way and tried to set up defenses for an invasion that wasn't happening. It was usually gratifying to see the citizens of a planet run in fear at his very presence, but he had too much going on right now to enjoy it, and it had just been kind of annoying.

Now he was waiting impatiently for Wander and Sylvia to get back from checking their planets.

He could at least admit that it had been a good idea to ask Wander for help. That was what he was known for, after all, and it wasn't like Hater had anyone else he could ask.

And it had given him something to do, something to calm him down after his initial panicked search all over the skull-ship. It had been awkward to call the zbornak again in order to ask Wander for help, but it had been more important that he find Peepers, if only to give him a piece of his mind, so he'd done it. And Wander had shown up to help, with Sylvia in toe, of course, and even though it had been awkward, it had still been a relief to have them there to help him figure out what to do.

Now, however, he was starting to worry that this hadn't been the best plan. One of the watchdogs had seen Peepers get into a cross-galactic taxi early this morning, and Sylvia had figured he'd be on one of the nearby planets, but what if he wasn't? What if Peepers had bought a ship or something on whatever planet he'd gone to and headed off somewhere else? Hater tried to reassure himself that he didn't pay his commander nearly enough to buy his own ship, but he still found himself concerned.

As he sat there, chewing over everything all over again, he spotted an orble floating down and heading towards him, and noted it contained the zbornak, with some annoyance. The orble popped as it landed, Sylvia striding up to him and shaking her head.

"No luck. You?"

"No." Hater looked away, still not comfortable being on speaking terms with the brutish alien, especially without Wander around and after their conversation yesterday.

Sylvia seemed to feel the same way. She picked a tree to lean against that was a good twenty feet away from Hater's bench, gaze resolutely focused on the evening sky overhead, likely watching for Wander. Well, good. It wasn't like Hater wanted to talk to her anyway.

That meant they were just waiting to see whether Wander had found anything, and that left Hater with a rather uncomfortable feeling. He didn't like the idea of Wander being the one to find Peepers, though whether it was a worry about Peepers shooting the nomad or Wander scaring his former commander away, even Hater couldn't be sure.

"You should talk to him."

Peepers' eye twitched again, gaze sliding back over to his unwelcome visitor.

Neither of them had spoken to each other for a while. Wander had ordered some drinks, water and tea for both of them. He hadn't asked Peepers what he wanted, and the watchdog had ignored the offerings when they were set in front of them. He suspected Wander was trying to get him to drink liquids so he wouldn't get a hangover tomorrow, trying to 'help' him once again.

"You think I haven't tried that?" His voice was almost a whisper. He wasn't sure why he kept talking to the weirdo, only that Wander's words seemed to demand responses. "I've been the one trying to talk about this since this whole thing started with that stupid destruction ceremony you planned together. It hasn't done any good."

"I don't think you tried before ya left." Peepers was silent and Wander continued after a moment, voice quiet as well. "Like I said before, Mr. Peepers, if ya don't wanna go back, that's your choice. No one's gonna stop you from doin' what's right fer you. But you an' Hatey've been together for a long time, an' you should at least tell 'im how you feel an' why yer leavin'. Don't ya think he deserves ta hear it from you?"

Peepers grimaced down into his glass. When had the hairy orange weirdo started making so much sense? He didn't want Wander to be right about this; it was all his fault to begin with, and he had no business telling Peepers what to do but, well, he was making a very compelling point. Peepers did feel slightly guilty over leaving with only a brief note, and without explaining anything.

Not only that, while he'd tried several times to get Hater to tell him what was going on between him and Wander and what he was thinking, Peepers had never exactly explained how he was feeling about all of this. The only time he'd sort of tried to do that had been when he'd found out about the destruction ceremony and confronted Hater about it. Then Hater had tried to destroy Wander, saved Wander, and then run away to hide in his room, which was not a very positive indicator for how their conversation might go if he went back to talk to his boss.

Still, he couldn't shake the feeling that he maybe had been a little hasty in his departure. Hater probably was pretty lost without him. Peepers would bet he didn't even know how to get into the skull-ship's computers or use the intercom.

"I'm not saying I agree." Peepers looked across at Wander, trying to see past any façade the furry mop might have up. Wander stared back, completely guileless. Agreeing with anything Wander had to say was just weird. "But if I did go and talk to Hater about all this, how do I even know he'd be willing to listen?" Or that talking would do anything to fix the problem, a problem that just so happened to be sitting directly across from him in the booth.

Wander spread his hands.

"Ya won't know unless you try!"

That was certainly true, and while Peepers wasn't willing to make the decision just yet, he supposed thinking about it a little longer couldn't hurt. Without thinking, he lifted the tea cup in front of him, taking a sip. Chamomile. It was a little soothing, though he wasn't about to admit that to the scruffy nomad.

Wander was smiling again, but Peepers elected to ignore it. He had some thinking to do, after all.

"That's it." Sylvia's voice was completely deadpan. "I'm going to buy him a phone."

They had been waiting for almost an hour past their agreed upon meeting time with no sign of the nomad, and both of them were out of patience.

Hater scoffed, shifting from the bench he'd been sitting on, standing up and crossing his arms.

"Why doesn't he have one already?" he demanded. It would certainly make it easier calling and making plans if he could contact Wander directly and didn't have to go through the zbornak every time.

"Because he's Wander." Sylvia sighed, turning away and looking out across the empty park. It was well into evening now, and the street lamps were on, but it was still quite dark. "It's like he's allergic to reliability. He lost the last three phones I got him, and gave the one before that to someone who needed it to get in touch with a long lost relative."

That did sound a lot like Wander.

Hater looked out across the trees of the park to where he could distantly see the skull-ship, listing slightly where it was parked. He still wasn't sure why the steering kept pulling to the right.

He was also tired of sitting here with the dumpy zbornak while Peepers, and now Wander, were out there somewhere in the vast reaches of the galaxy.

"I hope you're taking this opportunity to figure out what you're going to say once we finally do find him." Sylvia's tone made it clear she wasn't talking about Wander anymore.

Hater glared across at her.

"What's do you mean by that?"

Sylvia shrugged, posture relaxed as though they were discussing the weather or something.

"Just that he obviously left for a reason, and you and I both have an idea of what that reason was. If you want him to come back, you're going to actually have to talk about this."

"Argh! This is so stupid!" Hater growled, feeling lightning skitter across his bones. "Talking about 'feelings' is stupid. Bad guys don't do that!"

"Well, maybe you should start." Sylvia didn't seem impressed by his display. "Don't get me wrong; I don't particularly care if you two crazy kids make up or not. Fruit, it makes my job easier if Mr. Paranoid isn't hanging around causing trouble and kidnapping my buddy, but," she paused, giving Hater a serious look under her brows. "Wander cares about it. He cares about everybody after all, and you obviously care about this, whether you're willing to admit it or not."

Hater glared, but didn't correct her.

"Well then, what exactly am I supposed to say?" he grumbled.

"I don't know." Sylvia looked away again, up into the night sky, possibly hoping Wander would suddenly show up and save her from the conversation. Hater knew he was hoping the same thing. "But you'd better think of something, because I don't think showing up and yelling about how he's 'not aloud to quit' is going to be very convincing."

Hater didn't answer and Sylvia sighed, trotting over to the bench and sitting on it heavily.

"Listen Hater, do you think I like this whole thing between you and Wander? Because I don't. Wander is great; he's nice and kind and creative and lots of fun to travel with, and he means a lot to me. He's my best friend, and he's helped me more times than I can name. And, quite frankly, you don't deserve him."

Hater's glare darkened and he took a menacing step forward, opening his mouth to retort, but Sylvia cut him off.

"Do you know why I haven't tried to stop this?"

"Probably because he's your 'best pal'," Hater muttered, but he still found himself wanting to hear what the answer was.

"Well, there's that." The zbornak smiled fondly, a smile that seemed to be reserved only for the little nomad. "But also, because Wander talked to me about everything." Sylvia leveled her gaze at the overlord, emphasizing her point. "He told me how he feels. He really likes you, Grop knows why. And he told me how important this is to him. So, I'm putting up with it, just so long as Wander's happy."

Hater crossed his arms, hands gripping the bone uncomfortably. He felt an ache in his chest again at Sylvia's acknowledgement.

"So, what, I have to have another stupid, mushy conversation with Peepers all about our 'feelings?'" Hater was well and truly sick of those.

"If this is important to you, yes." Sylvia's affirmed. "Then, if he doesn't want to come back, I guess you're out of luck, but at least you'll have been honest with him."

Hater looked away, back at the vast night sky above them. Much as he'd rather not admit it, the zbornak had a point. Just yelling at Peepers and ignoring the problem wasn't going to solve anything. As a matter of fact, it had probably been part of what caused his commander to quit in the first place. He had to at least try to tell Peepers he wanted him back, and maybe even some of the other stuff.

Sylvia stood abruptly and he glanced back over at her.

"Well, let's go find Wander and the optic nerd, shall we?"

Sudden panic pierced through Hater. He'd just realized he really didn't know what to say to Peepers.

"You don't…want to wait a little longer?" he offered weakly.

"No, I don't think so." Sylvia gave him a glance that indicated she could tell why he was stalling. "Wander's been gone long enough that ordinarily I'd assume you'd captured him." She shot Hater a very pointed look and he shuffled his feet uncomfortably. "As that's not the case, I'd like to go see what he's actually doing. You're welcome to keep hanging out here if you want though."

"No, I'll go with you." Hater glared, stomping over to stand beside her as she dug out the orble juice. He still didn't like the brutish alien, and was pretty annoyed with her constant needling, but he wasn't about to wait here by himself. At least this way he was finally doing something. They were going to find Wander, and with any luck Peepers as well, and hopefully by then he'd have a better idea of what exactly he was going to say.

Thanks for reading!

I hope you enjoyed Peepers' talk with Wander. It was a little more civil than last time, anyway, and Hater and Sylvia getting to interact once more. A lot of talking and thinking in this chapter. Next time, we'll see if we can get Hater and Peepers talking and whether Peepers will feel like coming back.

Never Hurts To Help will likely be updated next. We are nearing the end of that story!

See you then!