Learning to Trust

"Hope will never be silent."
 -Harvey Milk

Chapter 7: Voice of Hope

Toshinori immediately began to cough, covering his mouth and turning away. What the hell? He shot a cursory glance around the parking lot, but few people were in the area, and those who were there had merely glanced up briefly, shaken their heads upon seeing Yamada Hizashi, otherwise known as the pro hero and teacher Present Mic, and then turned away.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Aizawa glare daggers at the other man, hissing irritably, "Could you keep it down, you moron?"

"What did I do?" The look of utter bafflement on Mic's face would have been funny if the situation weren't so serious.

"You almost gave him a heart attack with your screaming. That's what."

"Too loud?" Mic's voice held the innocent confusion of a child.

Toshinori took those few moments to compose himself, honestly surprised that he hadn't immediately had to answer to Aizawa, or anyone else, the second Mic had announced his name to the world. He took a couple of deep breaths and swiped at his mouth, finally releasing the death grip he'd unwittingly had on his chest.

Mic seemed to have finally noticed Toshinori's ashen face and shaky stance. He stiffened, eyes widening in alarm. "Whoa, man. Sorry! Do you legit have a heart condition?"

"I'm fine," the frail hero bit out through clenched teeth. His health was absolutely the last thing he was concerned about at the moment.

"Sorry." Mike fidgeted awkwardly with his sunglasses. "I didn't know."

"You have eyes, Mic," Aizawa sighed. "You can see he isn't well."

"I'm fine," Toshinori cut in. "Really." He briefly balled his hands into fists as was his tendency when he didn't have an immediate solution to an uncomfortable situation. In a low voice, he continued, "I'm more interested in why-"

But Aizawa cut him off just then, sending a sour look in Mic's direction. "I've told you before, Mic, it's not funny. You're literally the only person other than Joke who thinks it is."

"Joke thinks it's hilarious, actually."

"She thinks everything you say is hilarious, Mic. It isn't. Trust me."

Toshi shook his head in bafflement. "Funny?"

Aizawa sighed, glancing back down at his watch. "He usually only does it with interns and sidekicks. Calls them by their agency names instead of their real ones. Claims it's funny when they don't know how to respond."

"It is."

Aizawa huffed. "You're just bad at learning names. It isn't even a joke. It's the same reason you call every student 'listener' instead of using their names." He glanced at Toshinori. "Hey, do you have everything you need from the car, Yagi?"

At Toshi's distracted nod, he leaned in once more and grabbed something out of the console. Then he hit the lock button and slammed the door shut.

A… joke? Toshi just stared at the two men, baffled. He'd worked with both of them in an official capacity before. But of course, he'd been powered up at the time, so they'd been on their best behavior. A joke… That idea had never even occurred to him. Really, other than the cheesy humor he threw around as All Might to relax people around him, he really didn't have much experience with humor or chit chat. Nighteye used to try to keep him socialized at least, but really as brilliant as he'd been, he was more socially awkward than Toshinori, himself. Still, how out-of-touch had he allowed himself to get since his sidekick had left? Thank goodness he had Tsukauchi. Not that he could imagine his one and only friend actually teasing like this.

"Yagi?"

Toshinori was started from his thoughts by Aizawa, who stood, arms crossed, staring at him with that inscrutable face of his.

"Sorry."

Aizawa's eyes narrowed. "You okay? I'm sure in light of today's events, Nezu would understand if you needed to skip a meeting and just rest."

"No, no." Toshinori flashed the erasure hero a thumbs up and what he hoped to be a reasonably healthy looking smile. "I'm fine." His heart was still pounding uncomfortably in his chest from Mic's "joke," and he was sure both men had to hear it banging against his ribcage. Still, he wanted to touch base with Nezu anyway. Especially after his talk with Aizawa.

The smile must have been convincing enough. Yamada only tilted his head to the side, one eyebrow raised, and said nothing. Aizawa just sighed and tossed Toshi a couple of the small packets that he'd grabbed from the car.

He caught them without thinking, not even realizing what they were until after they were in his hands. Nutrient packs.

His expression must have betrayed his confusion, because Aizawa commented by way of explanation, "I somehow have a feeling you're just going to skip lunch. Don't. If you have to see Nezu now, at least take a couple of those. The last thing I need with exams coming up is Recovery Girl breathing down my neck when you pass out in the middle of the sidewalk."

"I couldn't-" Toshi began blustering, but Aizawa just blew him off.

"Relax. Just take them. I have a whole case in my office. Learn to accept help when you need it, Yagi. No one actually has to go it alone." He gave the tall blond a significant look. "Not even men like us. Especially not us." With that, Aizawa turned on his heel, thumbs hooked in his belt and began walking toward the main building. "Anyway, I've got kids to torture. See you around, Yagi. Try to stay alive til then. And Mic… make sure he eats one of those things."

Toshinori and Present Mic silently watched the black garbed man slouch off under the dappled early afternoon light.

Finally Mic spoke. "Well, that was weird." An odd look was still on his face. "Since when are you and Eraserhead buds? Last I knew, he was avoiding you."

Toshinori's lips twitched into another small smile. "We aren't friends. Recovery Girl made him drive me home after I got a little too familiar with a runaway support item. Trust me, he dislikes just about everything about me. He told me all about it. In detail. Also, he thinks I'm an idiot."

The leather-clad hero snorted at that. "Eraserhead calls everyone an idiot. Doesn't mean a thing. Come on. Let's get moving." He began walking toward another building where Nezu's office was located. He motioned Toshinori to follow him. "You gotta understand Eraserhead. He's rational to a fault. He's not gonna waste time giving advice to someone when he doesn't care if you follow it, ya dig? And he's hardest on people he likes."

The skeletal man walked close beside Mic, feeling like some faded shadow of a hero next to this loud and energetic teacher. He shook his head. "You've got it wrong. He knows I need to eat on a strict schedule. He just doesn't want to deal with Recovery Girl if I don't follow directions. That's what this is all about." He waved the packs in the air as though to better emphasize his point. And even if he does like Yagi… that's not going to last when he finds out my real connection to All Might. Aizawa is no Tsukauchi, that's for sure…

"Tell yourself what you want," Mic replied, shrugging. He pointed to the packets in Toshinori's hands. "You'd better eat one of those though."

Toshi just sighed and complied. At least these were easier for his system to digest than regular food. Still... He'd been looking forward to something from Lunch Rush, small though his portion would have had to be. Maybe I'll pick up something to take home for dinner…

Yamada remained surprisingly quiet, letting Toshinori eat in peace, not speaking again until he'd finished the nutrient pack and disposed of the packaging in a rubbish bin.

Toshi tucked the second packet into his suit pocket, and paused beside the bin to catch his breath, embarrassed that a walk across campus had winded him so badly. That's what you get when you try to function on two nutrient packs and some tea all day. You know your limits, old man. Aizawa's right. You're an idiot. He shivered a bit as a cool breeze puffed by. The bin was in the shade, and his coat had been torn up in the earlier snafu. Now he was left with nothing but his suit coat for heat-certainly not warm enough for this weakened shell he was trapped in.

It took Mic a moment to realize that his frail companion had stopped. "You okay, man?"

Toshinori noticed that the man was making an obvious effort to keep his voice down since Aizawa's lecture. I'm going to have to remember to thank Aizawa for that later…

The voice hero approached him cautiously. "You know, maybe Eraserhead's right. You should call it a day. I can tell the principal, no prob."

Toshi held up a quieting hand. "No. No, I'm fine. This is normal. Just need to get my second wind. Today's been a bit… more than I'm used to in this…" He trailed off glancing away. He'd almost said, "in this form." What's wrong with me today?

Yamada continued tentatively approaching. "Hey," he said seriously, "this isn't normal. Eraserhead meant it when he said I almost gave you a heart attack, didn't he?"

Toshi just shook his head. "Don't worry about it. I'm just getting old. Nothing to-"

"I don't think turning fifty usually looks like this."

Toshinori stiffened at those words and coughed hard in surprise. He quickly turned his face away, wiping the blood from his mouth, but it was obvious that Mic saw. Toshinori barely registered how the other man's face paled as his own mind tried to wrap itself around Yamada's words. His brow furrowed. "How do you know my age?" he asked slowly, his deep voice heavy and serious. He looked Yamada straight in the eye.

Mic stared blankly at the man for a moment before seeming to process what he'd said. Then he flushed awkwardly and motioned to a bench. "Why don't you sit?" he muttered. "No one's around, and since this route doesn't lead to student centers, it should be nice and quiet. Nezu will understand if we're late. Take a breather."

Toshinori sent him a suspicious look, but complied, moving over to the nearby bench and easing himself onto the cold metal slats. "Well?"

Mic took a deep breath as he crammed his hand into his pocket and withdrew a black leather wallet, handing it over. You dropped this near the main building…" He lowered his voice to a surprisingly quiet level. "Probably after the support item incident you mentioned." He glanced away for a moment as Toshiniori looked through it to confirm nothing was missing.

"I wasn't trying to be nosy, but I wanted to know who to return it to. Your My Number Card was in there… All Might."

Toshinori stiffened at that, his grip tightening on the wallet, and his breath catching once more. He forced a couple of steady breaths, and, without looking up, he stuffed the wallet into his pocket. Finally, he responded in a quiet, flat voice, "So you weren't joking back there. There's no hero licence in here, Mic. What makes you think I'm All Might?"

Yamada plopped down on the bench beside him, leaning forward, elbows resting on his knees, fingers interlaced. Pointedly avoiding eye contact. "No. There was no hero licence. And everything says Yagi Toshinori… but I'm right, aren't I?"

When Toshinori didn't immediately reply, Yamada continued. "Your quirk registration card is in there. Enhancement quirk. It makes sense." He glanced over at the skeletal man beside him. "And your mannerisms give you away. From one over-the-top hero to another, I know we can't keep up the persona all the time. We slip. The thumbs up was a dead giveaway. Especially when you're smiling. You do that a lot. Your speech patterns are entirely different, but there are certain things that you say and do that match up. I noticed during the meeting, but I assumed you just picked some stuff up from your boss. I've been watching you since then, though. It's too many little things. And it was pretty obvious when I called you All Might in front of Aizawa." He rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. "Sorry about that. I figured you'd react if I was right, and I knew no one would take me seriously. Seemed like a safe bet, ya know?"

Toshinori sighed deeply and leaned back on the bench, rubbing his eyes. "And if I tell you you're right?"

"I'd thank you for not lying about it."

Toshinori said nothing in reply.

"So, are you okay, man?"

That wasn't what Toshinori had expected. Maybe some berating for lying in the first place, but not the concern. He started and looked to see the younger man studying him. "I'm-"

"Don't say you're fine," Mic cut in. "I'm picking up that 'fine' just means that you don't want people to fuss about whatever's wrong with you." He began tapping out a nervous beat on his knee, and glanced away. "You know, All Might-"

"Yagi, please. Yagi Toshinori."

"Sure. Right. Yagi. You know, I used to be an insane fan of yours? Still kinda am, if I'm honest. I have an autographed poster and everything packed away somewhere."

Toshinori smiled a little at that. "I didn't expect you to be into my style."

Yamada grinned at that, starting off into the distance, still beating out that nervous little solo on his knee with his fingertips. "Of course I was. Who wasn't? I mean, why do you think so many of us became heroes? If you could go out there and save a thousand people by yourself, why not some other kid with a pretty cool quirk? Why not even the weird kid who couldn't stop yelling?" Yamada laughed quietly, his expression unnaturally serious. His face was still a bit flushed, probably from the cool air as much as from embarrassment.

"Anyone can be a hero," Toshi replied quietly.

Yamada nodded. "Yeah. I remember you saying that on TV once. I knew I could never be like you, but watching you made me want to be a hero, too."

The two men sat quietly side-by-side for a long moment. Toshinori leaned forward again, back bent and arms resting on his knees, staring down at his hands. Painfully thin. Just like the rest of him now. His joints ached on bad days. His limbs felt like lead. Three hours a day. There's no way I can save a thousand people by myself anymore. Not like this. I'm lucky to take down a few big league villains with the help of the Police Force . How much longer can I keep it up before the wrong person realizes? Or before someone dies and I can't help because my time runs out?

"What's wrong, big guy?"

Toshinori snorted at that. "Nothing. I'm…" He trailed off as he realized he was about to restate his mantra of fine, fine, fine… Always fine. Just keep smiling and maybe no one will notice... Maybe I can even keep fooling myself...

"I'm sorry," he replied simply. "This must be a disappointment."

"A… what? Seriously... what are you talking about?"

"This is all I am now. My hero work is getting pretty limited. And you can see what my health is like. Not very glamorous, huh?"

Mic looked incredulous. "You're kidding, right? I was never motivated by your muscles." He held up his own skinny arms. "Do I look like the kind of hero who was your fan because you were strong? I was your fan because you didn't give up, even when you probably should have. Made me feel like I could do that, too. You gave us hope. I don't care if you're older or you lost some weight. Or whatever. You're still a hero, same as the rest of us. No one who matters is gonna care about stuff like that." His pale green eyes slid over to study Toshinori, who had been stunned into speechlessness. "But honestly... answer me this time. You okay? I mean, I get it if this is what you've always looked like and your quirk just sorta amps you up, but the way you keep dodging my question... I don't like it. And then there's the blood. That has me kinda worried, too."

"Don't be." Toshinori managed one of his broad smiles-the sort he usually saved for times when he was saving a frightened bystander. "I'm just getting old, like I said. Yeah… fifty doesn't usually look like this, but fight the kind of battles that I do at close range for as long as I have, and your body starts to wear out." Internally Toshi winced. He didn't want to lie about this, so he added, "I suffered a pretty bad injury a few years ago. I'll probably be retiring soon. That's one reason I'm here. I can't keep fighting the way I used to. Teaching here gives me something else to do. Another way to still be useful." Not the full truth, but he supposed it was better than an outright lie.

"You could have told us, you know."

But Toshinori just shook his head. "I need to decide where I stand here. I'm no teacher." He sighed. "I wasn't even much of a student to be honest. I don't know that UA is actually a good fit for me. I may cause more harm than good here. And if I don't decide to stay, why destroy everyone's image of me?" He turned his severe gaze on Yamada.

"You're worried people will think less of you?"

"I'm worried they'll lose hope. I'm supposed to be the Symbol of Peace. This-" He held up his skeletal arms for Mic to see "-isn't likely to garner much hope. I don't want people to lose their hero for no reason. Better I go down fighting than let everyone down like that."

"You sure about that?"

At Toshi's puzzled expression, Yamada shrugged. "I'm just sayin'... I'd rather have you be alive like this than be a dead symbol. Pretty sure most people would agree."

Toshinori rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"Look, man," Mic continued, "I won't tell anyone who you really are. That's your call. You do you. But just remember that some of us weren't looking up to you to actually physically save us. Some of us got our hope from the fact that you always seemed to care about everyone, so we could all believe that you would personally save any of us, even if we weren't important. Every one of us felt like we were worth saving because All Might was there. Even loud brats like me." He stood facing the sun and stared ahead at the large building before them. "And that's something you can still do right here."

Author's Note: I just wanted to point out that Mic's voice has been the most challenging for me to write yet. I apologize if it feels off. I was trying to keep with his voice in the series while toning it down, as I feel he would for a conversation like this. I hope it worked.

*EDIT* I did tone down his Mic-isms quite a bit in a recent edit, as it was (very fairly) pointed out to be a bit overboard. Sorry about that! I hope it's better!

Thanks so much to lolo popoki for the wonderful beta work! And thanks to everyone who has read (and commented) on this story so far. I appreciate it! I hope you enjoyed the chapter.

Sincerely,
Sirius:)