Takeshi Yamato: Well… things are getting really nuts now.

Ron the True Fan: And for once, it's not MY fault!

Pallet Town, outside the Ketchum Residence, 1402 hours local time, Day 248 of Ash Ketchum's Pokemon Journey

After the GS Ball reveal, Ash was… pissed. But outburst aside, he was NOT going to take it out on the Celebi.

So he decided to pack and prepare for the trip to Ransei, starting with getting…well, a bigger bag. Enough to carry…well a LOT of Pokeballs.

He took out the Rocket machine pistol and set it on the table, unloading it and preparing to take it apart and clean it, but not before he heard an angry yell.

"ASH!" came the voice of Max Maple, approaching the house.

"Oh, joy." Ash said dryly. "What did I do THIS time?"

"Pika." 'Why don't we find out?' Pikachu asked, Ash sighing and continuing to dismantle the weapon, figuring he might as well.

He got to removing the trigger mechanism when Max barged in. "Hello, Max." Ash greeted, continuing to dismantle the weapon. "Is there a reason for the anger, or do I have to ask?"

"You son of a BITCH." Max snapped, finally resorting to cursing. "My SISTER."

Ash sighed. It was depressing that the only thing he could muster to counter Max's indignation was exasperation. "Well, you know about the time travel thing." he deadpanned. "Just so you know, I didn't have much of a say-"

"You being from an alternate future doesn't factor into this!" Max cut off. "All that matters is my sister!"

Pikachu sparked warningly. "Pika." 'Calm your shit or I put you down.' Pikachu said, knowing Max couldn't understand his words exactly. The message was STILL clear.

"May fell in love with you. You manipulated her, you used her feelings for you-" Max started before Ash gave him a dark look to SHUT UP NOW.

"Max… I left your sister behind so she could fall for someone ELSE." he ground out. "I am not deserving. I have failed FAR too much to be worthy of anyone's love, much less your sister."

"And you tortured her with it by leaving her behind! You're as bad as the Magma grunt that tried to rape her!"

Ash dropped the trigger mechanism to the table and stood up slowly, then fixed Max with a look of pure, unfiltered RAGE.

"What." he demanded, pure fury and malice in his voice.

THAT took all the fire out of Max, making him fall to the floor and scramble to a wall as far from Ash as possible. "I-it was last year." he stammered, Ash slowly walking towards the young man. "S-she was trying to learn how some Pokemon behaved when… well, you know what May looks like-"

"Like a 16 year old." Ash cut off, pulling out his Pokedex.

Whoever did it DIED. His list of people that absolutely needed to be put in the ground just went up by one.

Max knew what Ash was doing: cycling in Natu to teleport him to Hoenn. "He's already dead!" he exclamed. "Maxie killed him before he could do it, saying that… well, it's a lot less polite then-"

"Max." Ash cut off, STILL thoroughly PISSED. "Repeat it."

Max gulped. "…'Shit like that does not belong in Team Magma'." he quoted, hoping this would calm Ash down. "He took responsibility for what happened and… Can you please calm down? I'm going to soil myself if you keep glaring at me…"

Ash turned his gaze away from Max. This was just another reason to put Cyrus in the ground. May was nearly raped because he fucked with the timeline.

"Max… Your sister can love whoever she wants to." he said. "As long as it's not me. I'm not a good fit for her."

(Spider webs cracked in his mind, pleasing a tyrant.)

Kyoji felt a headache coming on.

Ash must've been being stupid again. His annoyance was only tempered by the fact he had to remind himself that Ash had been through as much as Kyoji himself and guilt was powerful.

He could've taken a sizable chunk of his family's fortune and lived well… but he did not. And while Kyoji was key in the destruction of his family, Ash felt responsible for the death of an entire universe.

A crime family against reality itself. Enough to make him sympathetic, but not to the point of just letting him keep being an idiot about the girls that were VERY much in love with him and he them.

But the Ranseian knew part of that wasn't just guilt. A tyrant was in his head. One that wanted to torture Ash as revenge for his part in preventing the return of his empire. And they were so deep inside only Arceus could drag them out. But Arceus was notoriously hard to contact. Only 23 times that historians knew of did the Creator grace the world and not once were any of those times pleasant.

Then again… wrath of God in all its' fury and all.

Speaking of gods… Oh, boy…

A spritely grass-type Legendary was flitting about, making Gible dizzy. "Giiiiiiiibbbbbbbbbbb…" 'Stop moving…my head hurts…' the land shark pleaded, the young Celebi going too fast for him. Well, he also wanted to chomp.

…He was a Gible. It was what they did.

"Bi!" 'Your Gible's different then I remember, Daddy.' said the time travel Pokemon, which only added to Kyoji's confusion.

"WHY are you calling me that?" he asked, making Celebi look at him.

"Bi?" 'Because you're daddy?' she said, tilting her head to one side. "Bi?" 'Why? Shouldn't I?'

Kyoji was many things - including well-versed in warfare, bad at dealing with people and having a love of parrots and land sharks - but cruel to…well, children was not one of them. "No, it's just…been a while." he said. "I kinda forgot."

He was also well-versed in lying. But that tied into the cruelty thing. After all, what was a lie to a child to comfort them then a truth that would hurt them? Celebi seemingly believed him, eyesmiling like a certain land shark.

Speaking of…

CHOMP!

"Gible!" cried the land shark, who seemingly ATE the grass-type.

"GIBLE NO!" Kyoji cried, naturally worried for the little girl. Then Gible opened his maw and inside was Celebi, giggling.

"Brrii!" 'Gible is fun!' she cried, getting an eyesmile from the land shark.

Kyoji sighed, Celebi taking to the air again before he patted her on the head. "You scared me." he admitted. "Well, I suppose we should really see what you can do, right?"

Celebi wren't really known as fighters, but hopefully she knew something until his own team could back her up.

"Bi!" 'Ok!' she cried, before a bubble formed around them. Kyoji paled.

This was NOT what he had in mind! Ash was going to kill him if this was what he thought it was!

A shimmering purple barrier formed over Pallet, Ash looking outside.

"Someone is screwing with time travel." he said, knowing that all too well before…Sabrina fell from the roof?

"Uh…" she groaned, laying in a rose bush.

"Sabrina…" Ash started before Max struggled to look at the gym leader. "What are you doing?"

The psychic pulled herself out of the bush, wincing at the pain. "I had time to visit. Then I ran into the time bubble mid-teleport." she said, struggling to stand. "…Celebi?"

"If this is Kyoji, there's going to be hell to pay." Ash deadpanned. "I already have Cyrus screwing with time: I don't need someone else doing it, too."

"Stay calm… Stay very calm…" Kyoji said as Celebi giggled. "Touch. NOTHING."

He learned one thing from Ash's temporal shenanigans: do not fuck with time. The only ones that SHOULD were Dialga and Celebi, but only if they needed to.

Cyrus tried that. Ended the universe and left ash with a raging guilt complex. Humans and temporal bullshit did not mix. And Kyoji wasn't stupid enough to ignore Ash's experience with time shit. So he was not going to touch a goddamn thing.

Currently he stood inside a bubble that the little Celebi had conjured up, and surrounding them were a… myriad of thread-like objects almost looking like a massive spider web. The webs were white-blue in color and they were utterly massive. "Sweetie… where are we…?"

"The time stream, Daddy!" Celebi explained, "Where all timelines exist!" She looked around, looking confused. "Strange… some threads look… severed for some reason…"

Kyoji looked, and sure enough while many threads were interconnected, there was a large number that seemed to of been… broken off, left dangling around and floating aimlessly.

"Just… don't touch anything…" Kyoji said cautiously, taking a step backwards. "Let's just go back and-GAK!" He tripped on something, causing him to fall backwards… and into one of the streams head-first, but Gible grabbed him before he could fall completely inside.

From Kyoji's perspective, his head went inside… and at first he thought he was just looking at regular-old Pallet town. "Oh, thank Arceus…" He muttered, "So we just go into our normal timeline and-"

"I'm going dad!" A feminine voice said, as a figure walked out of Ash's house… wearing Ash's clothes, but with a big rack, longer black hair and…

…oh…

…oh no…

"...this is not my universe…" He muttered, looking at the… admittedly sexy-looking female version of Ash with a Pikachu hopping on her shoulder. "Oh shit, she's coming this way… how the fuck do I-GAK!" Suddenly he felt himself being tugged back - before the next thing he knew he was back in the bubble.

"Gib? 'You Okay?'" Gible looked up at him after he and Celebi helped pull him out of the alternate timestream.

"Uh… yeah, I think…" He grumbled, shaking his head. "Just… I'm… not gonna be looking at Ash the same way for a bit… oh god, I hope Sabrina doesn't read my mind on that… "

She probably would. But Kyoji soon had OTHER problems.

"Bi!" 'I can tie the strings together!' she declared, making Kyoji IMMEDIATELY forget…Ashley, for lack of a better term.

If Celebi started tying the timelines together…Oh, Ash was going to do WORSE then kill him…

"Celebi, why don't we leave that for Dialga?" he asked, knowing that the God of Time was probably better off dealing with this then a…young-ish Celebi.

Less chances of accidentally turning people into Pokemon or turning Ash into a very hot chick.

Or turning HIM into a very hot chick. …Ok, he was KINDA mixed on that one, but Ash would still kill him.

Celebi ignored him and started putting her hands on the 'strings', tying to fix everything.

Back in Pallet, everyone had noticed the skies.

"…Someone care to explain?" Robin asked.

"Time shit." replied all of Ash's previous veteran travelers in a deadpan.

"BEK!" Jaden grunted as he tripped into another timeline "Celebi! This… isn't…" He began to protest, before looking at his surroundings and… noticing he wasn't alone. Standing next to him was… a woman. At least he thought it was a woman… only… different… namely two key factors. Number 1: She had two Gible-like horns, a fin on her back, and her skin was a mixture of tans and yellows… and Number 2: She was totally naked and a fucking bombshell.

"...what the fuck…?" Kyoji muttered, his face turning red at the sight.

"Gob?" The… Pokemon-girl spoke, looking surprised before grinning rather… sulturily. "Goble…"

"…I… I need to g-go…" He began, before the woman started to lung at her. "Fuck, Fuck! FUUU-" Suddenly he was once again pulled out of the time stream and back into… the space between timelines.

"Bi! 'Sorry!'" Celebi apologized, "Celebi! 'Bumped into you… why is your face so red?'"

"…Sabrina's gonna have so many fucking questions when she reads my mind next time…" Kyoji muttered.

"Bi!" 'Oh, I like that one!' the pixie Pokemon declared.

Gible looked at him, Kyoji looking away. "Gib?" 'What'd I do?' he asked, sad.

"I will never be able to look at Gibles the same way ever again…" he muttered before reaching for the 'knots' in the timestream. Ash was going to kill him for starting this, but he was going to make damn sure Celebi couldn't make things worse!

That said, he was aware this would be like plugging holes in a sinking ship: utterly freaking pointless and might makes things worse.

Oh, well: carpe diem.

"Okay, what did you do here?" Kyoji groaned, looking at the Timeline.

"Celebi, bi bi, Cele!" 'I tried to tie up this timeline to pieces of another timeline to balance themselves out!' The little green time-traveller said, "Bi…" 'Didn't work though, but if we untie it I can fix that one over there!'

"Let's… just put it back the way we found it…" The soldier muttered, as he grabbed the 'modification' Celebi made, untying it…then he heard a loud 'popping' sound before something crashed into him.

"OOF!"

"Goble?"

"…oh no…" Kyoji paled, looking up… and seeing the short Gible-like Girl laying atop of him, blinking in surprise, before smiling.

"Goble!" She said, before giving him a hug… and a kiss.

"…Gib?" '…what?' Gible muttered in confusion.

The temporal barrier started to fluctuate.

Well, they were doomed anyway. What the hell.

Ash calmly left the house, heading for the ranch, where everyone was just watching the skies.

Before he opened his mouth, Serena raised a hand. "If this is the cliche 'we're all gonna die, so here's the declaration of love' thing, we're not interested." she said.

"But-" Ash started.

"We ALREADY KNOW." Misty cut off. "Besides, unless Dialga's napping, we'll be fine." And sure enough, the barrier faded away, leaving a clear sky.

Then a bubble appeared, Kyoji and Gible dropping out of it.

Both looked traumatized. Ash walked up to them, Anabel giving him a look to not, well, gut him like a fish.

"You know, if I wasn't sure this was an accident, I'd probably be telling Pikachu to zap you." Ash stated dryly. "Hasn't my experiences with time travel taught you anything?"

"No fucky with time." Kyoji said, somewhat dazed.

"Gible…" 'That was weird… why was she pretty?' the land shark asked.

Kyoji looked at Gible. "Please don't mention that." he asked. "I don't want-"

"Me to flay your mind?" Sabrina asked, making both of them look behind him, seeing a smirking Sabrina.

"Oh, crap." the Ranseian said.

"Kyoji, I have questions, but absolutely none of them are child-friendly." the greenette said, more amused then offended. "You're going to have a VERY hard time looking at Gible the same way from now on, though."

"Gible." 'Lady, I'M going to have a hard time looking at my kind the same way ever again.' the yellow shark said before another Celebi popped in.

"Celebi." 'Someone screwed with time.' she declared, confirming this was Ash's. She then gave Kyoji a look. "Bi." 'Explain NOW.'

"Uh, not my fault…" Kyoji said, "Um, it was… well…"

"Bi…" 'S-Sorry…' Celebi blinked… before floating from behind Kyoji was a… smaller Celebi, looking very sheepish, still sorta hiding behind Kyoji.

Ash's facepalmed. "Bi…" 'Stay here. I need to figure out if I need to get Dialga involved.' she said, right before disappearing.

"Kyoji." Ash started, startling the Ranseian. "I'm going to ask the Porygon in my Pokedex if ANYTHING has changed. Just…keep your baby Celebi from going back in time for a while, please. Last thing I want is to have to go through going back in time AGAIN."

"Oh, come on-" Kyoji protested before Sabrina put a hand on his shoulder.

"Considering what happened to send him here, it's not unreasonable to…err on the side of caution." she said right before they felt the ground rumble.

"We're not on a fault line." Serena said before Anabel pointed down the road leading from Viridian. Coming down that road…was an Onix.

Kyoji got up, looking at the giant snake of rock before glancing at Ash. "You know anyone with an Onix?" he asked.

"Brock Slate, Gym Leader from Pewter City." Ash said, fondly. "Taught me a lot along with Misty during my early days in Kanto. Hell of a cook, too."

Kyoji pulled out a pair of field binoculars to get a look at the man in question before his expression turned into shock. "Uh…" he started.

"What is it?" the Pallet trainer asked before Mei took them from the shocked specops soldier.

"Are you sure you're remembering clearly?" she asked as the Onix dove underground. "Because-"

"Mei, nothing personal, but I know Brock." Ash cut off, but rubbed the back of his neck. "Still, he's got no reason to leave the gym-"

The ground shook as Onix emerged from the ground, a little too close for comfort.

"Hi, Ash!" declared a female voice, near Onix's head, revealing a dark-skinned young woman, smiling at them. She wore a black and green vest under an orange shirt with shorts that made Misty's almost conservative and hiking boots that complimented her figure, which was…well, the only thing Ash could describe it was a mixture of a rock climber and a supermodel, with all the muscle of the former and…well, all the curves in all the right places of the latter. Especially her bust.

Dark brown hair and eternally squinting eyes…

Ash's eyes narrowed as he put the pieces together. Kyoji ALSO put the pieces together and started getting to his feet.

"Sorry about the mess!" the girl that was seemingly a female Brock shouted. "It took me three months to get the paperwork to have my dad reinstated as the Pewter Gym Leader. Seriously, he gets his ass handed to him by someone with a Galaran Farfetch'd and he goes off hiding in the mountains."

Ash was now very, VERY mad and Kyoji knew better then to stay.

Kyoji had FUCKED THE TIMELINE.

The female Brock looked to Misty. "Guess we'll be travelling together after all!" she said cheerfully, Kyoji taking this as a chance to run.

That said…

"GET BACK HERE, YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Ash roared, chasing after him.

A flock of Natus looked at the land shark and soldier and flapped their wings. "NATU!" 'FLY, YOU FOOLS! FLY!' they squawked.

"WE'RE TRYING!" Kyoji yelled before he heard the snap-hiss of the beam sword he gave Ash activating.

Serena chuckled as Ash ran after Kyoji. He fucked with time, so Ash was right to be angry.

He's survive though.

"Is there…something I missed?" asked the very, VERY sexy female Brock, who was two steps short of looking like a more grown-up version of Iris.

Oh, BOY was her imagination running wild.

"Nothing. Just something Kyoji did before you… got here." Misty said, telling the truth from a certain vantage point. 'Anabel, I KNOW you can hear me, so PLEASE give me this lady's name!'

'Already on it.' Anabel said, scanning her mind. '…Rebecca Slate, normally just Becca. She's 16, oldest of her siblings… and is in love with Ash.'

Misty could all but HEAR Taggard cackling at the idea of a strong 'warrior woman' for Ash's harem. He was probably watching. Asshole.

'How… love?' Misty asked.

'Started with the gym battle, where he handed her ass to her. Then taking on the Rockets at Mount Moon alone and… well, Orre pretty much turned her into Serena.' Anabel explained.

'I resent that remark.' Astral Serena said.

'Hey, as long as she's interested in both sides of the fence, who are we to argue?' came the living libido called Jade.

Misty fought the blush. "So, Becca…" she started. "You're planning on coming with us?"

"Of course!" Becca said. "Misty, I know it's awkward and all, but… well…"

"I know." Misty said. "I know." all too well.

The rock climber looked around. "Anyone want to introduce themselves?" she asked.

Serena's eyes flashed red. Misty sighed as Jade prepared to scar Becca for life.

Or turn her into a submissive bedmate. Whichever.

Kyoji was very good at running.

Cops, soldiers, angry maidens, he outran them all.

So why was an almost 15 year old catching up to him with a fucking laser sword?!

He jumped over a river that Ash just plowed through, unheeding of the water before running into what was more or less a wall of rock.

Gible unearthed himself, looking at it before looking at his friend. "Gible." 'Sorry. Can't carry you up there.' he said. "Gi." 'You're too heavy.'

"Oh, thanks a lot, land shark!" Kyoji snapped before they heard the hum of the blade.

"GIB!" 'EVERY LAND SHARK FOR HIMSELF!' cried the land shark as he dove and ran.

Kyoji looked at Ash over his shoulder. "Ash…" he said, trying to be disarming. "I know things have gotten-OH FUCK!" Kyoji jumped as Ash rushed and swung, plasma gashing at the rocks.

"You." Ash growled, Kyoji knowing this was more the King then Ash. "Fucked. With. Time."

"It was an accident!" Kyoji exclaimed. "Look, I know I fucked up!"

"Brock was my friend! He was one of the biggest things in my life!" Ash exclaimed. "The big brother I never had, the FATHER I never had! NOW LOOK WHAT'S HAPPENED!"

Kyoji winced. He had done WRONG. But it WAS an accident. He had to get Ash to burn out the anger and listen to reason. After all, he was lashing out because a major pillar of stability just VANISHED and was replaced with a girl that was barely older then he was.

So no, he wasn't taking this personally.

Ash dropped the blade, falling to his knees. "Arceus fucking hates me." he wept. "I'm not his chosen. I'm his chewtoy."

Kyoji cautiously approached him. "Look… Nothing I say can change what's happened." he admitted. "But… it wasn't intentional. It was an accident. I'm not even sure it was me! It could've been Celebi, it could've been both of us…"

Ash just silently mourned.

"Come on." he said, reaching out to Ash. "I can't change what happened."

Ash looked back at him. "I just tried to kill you." he said.

Kyoji scoffed. "Look, from your perspective, I just erased one of the biggest presences in your life and replaced it with a busty hiker." he said, Ash giving him a look for THAT comment. "You were right to be mad. Besides, you weren't thinking straight. If you WERE… well, I'm pretty sure I'd be dead."

Ash reached out with his own hand, Kyoji helping him to his feet. "Look at it this way." Kyoji started. "That's not Brock. That's… his sister."

"I've met Brock's siblings." Ash retorted dryly. "I'm not going to fool myself THAT easily."

Kyoji narrowed his eyes. "I'm trying to help. You know, since I fucked up?" he said, owning up to the whole reason the pretty Brock-ette even existed.

Gible then surfaced, seeing Ash's expression. And decided there was only one thing to do.

He powered into the air… and latched onto Ash's head with a mighty CHOMP.

"Aw…" Becca said as she picked up a confused Gible. "He's cute!"

"Gible?" 'Why does she smell like Brock?' he asked, before she started scratching his fin, making him eyesmile and warble. "Giiiiiiiiiibbbbbbbbb…" 'Oh, that's Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice…'

All of Ash's Pokemon that knew Brock personally STARED.

"Tile." 'I am confused.' Sceptile stated.

"Char." 'No shit. I am also…torn on whether or not to call this an improvement.' Charizard said, getting looks from ALL of his starters. (minus Pikachu, who was laughing his ass off)

"Ape." 'What.' Infernape stated.

"Char." 'Think about it. Brock was always good for Ash as a brother figure.' he explained. "Zard." 'Imagine that caring figure as a mate.'

They REALLY couldn't make any argument against that. It would also really help with Ash's mental stability to have Brock in some form or another around him again.

Database corruption. Error. Error.

Ron the True Fan: I am just going to make this ABUNDANTLY clear…(Points at Jorn) HE DID IT!

117Jorn: I regret nothing. The reference had to be made. Of course now the question is… what happened to Goble?

Ron the True Fan: Again, direct ALL blame towards him. ESPECIALLY for the new girl. He came up with it and came up with a good excuse as to how to execute it. One so good even my picky ass couldn't argue with it.

Takeshi Yamato: *sighs* Time travel can get REALLY strange sometimes.

Ron the True Fan: It could be worse. You should see what Daniels is going through. (Distant scream of pain) As if he doesn't DESERVE everything he gets…

Ja Ne!