The Joker liked to have fun with his work, but work is only fun when he had someone to play with. Like... Commissioner Gordon, or Batsie. But Johnny was getting all the attention. He didn't like being ignored.

"OOOOH PUDDIN!" Joker huffed loudly, most people were ignoring him. He stood up from his cluttered desk and without a second though jumped out the window. He know one person who wouldn't ignore him... or smother him in spandex.

4:16 AM

"We're gonna need to start putting out advertisements." Marcus suggested, wrapping his coat around his neck tighter. Gary and Kyle were trailing behind Alexandria and Marcus grunting in agreement with their unspoken second in command, sipping heavily from their large coffees. "We have a few people I know in the mob coming here but they aren't apart of the Family proper. If we get to them, we can get to the Penguin."

Alexandria was surprised, albeit pleasantly to find Marcus had some brains to him beyond chemicals and cookies, and a distaste towards to "Short, Round, and Birdbrained".

"I'm sure word will spread enough. We're getting a following we just need to back it. I was going over some old cook books and found some good Italian recipes." Alexandria pulled her key out of her pocket. It was early morning and they weren't going to be opened today. They had a lot of work to do if they were to set their plan in motion. Unlocking the door she couldn't help but drop her coffee, the warm liquids splashing her legs as the lid busted off.

All her tables were pushed to the center, tarps haphazardly strewn about. The smell of paint wafted around in the cool breeze, as a clash of colours were slapped on walls, floors, and the kitchen swing door. Smiling faces and cartoonish batmans in various scenes of... humiliation littered the large Rorschach. And right in the center... The Joker.

"Heeeey Dollface! It's been a while." The Joker spread his arms wide. "I brought a gift." Alexandria walked in, stunned. The boys walked in before closing the door and, wisely, locking it.

"What?...You..."

"I know, your in shock of my generosity!" The Joker but on an over dramatic face, the back of his hand resting on his forehead, "But I do what I can for my...Friends." Gary and Kyle muttered a greeting before retreating to the kitchen, starting both pots of coffee.

"Why?" Alexandria slumped in booth, staring at a picture of the Batman hanging upside down over a tank of... fish? The Joker frowned.

"It's a gift." he walked over to her in two steps using his finger to push her face into a forced smile. "I thought sprucing up the place would be a good idea. Marco, it's a good idea right?" Marcus stood at attention.

"Actually, yeah."

"See!"

"WHAT?!"

"Boss, let's be honest the foods great but the look is..." he faltered at the glare from Alexandria, "Not what the mob is used to."

"The Mob?" The Joker grinned widely and slowly turned his head back to Alexandria. "Oh Alex you've been keeping secrets." His grin darkened with a chuckle

"Friends don't keep secrets." Alexendria sighed, before running over the Penguins visit and subsequent plan. Gary scuttled out with three cups of coffee before slinking back to the kitchen. The Joker was having a riot.

"HAHAHAHA! You..." snort. "You want to push Waldo outta business!" The wheezing started. "I," snort. "I knew you were, HeeHEEHEEE, crazy!" Alexandria glared over the lip of her cup.

"I'm... not crazy. I'm mad."

"Don't be mad! HAHAHA!" Joker wiped an eye, reaching for the creamer blindly but grabbing the salt, he began pouring it in his coffee. "It's a brilliant idea."

"You really think so, huh?" she glanced at Marcus, "Then we know it's crazy."

"Alex, Alex, Alex," She winced at each word. "I may be 'CRAZY' but there is one thing you should know by now. My plans are just crazy enough to work."

And with that Alexandria only had one thought as The Joker drank his salty coffee without flinching or caring.

There's not enough paint to cover up this mess...

5:15 AM

"You're suit has been laid out, but I highly suggest you get some rest, Sir."

"Thank you Alfred but not tonight." Bruce grinned weakly at his joke.

"Any clues as to The Jokers' whereabouts?" Alfred watched as Bruce sat at his desk logging into his secure Bat-Network.

"No, but sources say he's been frequenting the Narrows. I haven't been able to follow any leads, with Scarecrow and Killer Croc causing trouble it's been..."

"Tiresome, Sir?"

"You're not going to drop it are you?"

"No, Sir. Someone needs to look out for you're health, heaven knows you don't...Sir." Bruce chuckled as he slipped off his cowl.

"Only a short nap."

"Of course, Master Bruce." Though truth be told, Alfred was going to be very busy, he just might lose track of time... for a few hours.

Both men left the Batcave, both ready for a new day.

okay...so holy hell... I did not think this would garner so much attention. Thank you all so much for your reviews, some of the best I've ever received. Updates will be slow as I am currently looking for a new place to live, but hey, I have tons of ideas. Thank you all so much!