Chapter 20

Ron stepped down the grand staircase with a high level of indifference as he walked. He knew he could be seen stomping or bouldering along when he was angry or upset. In that moment he felt too deflated and numb to be doing anything so dramatic.

Absentmindedly he licked at his lip, now fatter still with a metallic taste as it had been freshly reopened. He really had to remember to drop his jaw next time he got into it with Harry, he really did favour aiming for his mouth.

The issue that cut at him most was Harry's reaction to Hermione, the anger he showed her was as unjust in his mind, Ron felt solely responsible and wanted to shield her. But Hermione was as stubborn as they both were and she dug her heals in, not allowing Ron to take the blame. She'd gone further too, not begging or pandering to Harry and instead demanding that they all talk, and Harry see it for what it really was and not what he thought it was.

Ron felt it might have worked had she not been so insistent on putting herself between him and Harry to protect him. Ron had offered no resistance to Harry's punches. Hermione had physically placed herself between them and when that wasn't enough, drew her wand on her boyfriend. This seemed to tip Harry over, and he had stormed out of the room. Hermione said nothing to Ron as she left to go after Harry.

Ron had decided he was left with little choice but to occupy himself for a while before spending the night somewhere other than his dorm. And with that he had fallen on his ever-reliable game of Champions. But the idea did nothing to lift his mood, if at all possible, it brought even more anger as he thought about his best mate and how they were meant to share this joy.

"Pansy!", Draco shouted as he caught her, he took a tight grip of her wrist, trying to pull her back towards him.

"GET OFF!", she yelled as she wrenched herself from him. There was a wild anger in her eyes which appeared bloodshot and tired as she continued to walk off from him.

Draco didn't stop his advance as he caught her again, this time pushing her into a wall and pinning her there.

"Don't you dare touch me!", she hissed with so much anger she spat over him.

Draco recoiled slightly as she did, "Pansy I wouldn't!" his anger apparent as he realised for a moment that she thought he was capable of doing something to her like, that! "Pansy I just want to talk".

She kept trying to push past him, "you had your chance to talk, I was even stupid enough to kiss you and you had that chance too", she kept pushing against him with every word. "You, wretched, despicable…shite!".

She pushed into him again and he jumped back, but Draco flung his hands up to try and holt her from leaving and instead took to blocking her way.

"Look, not grabbing you! Just please wait a minute".

"Why, you've just brought me here to feed me that crap and get me to neck on with you".

"Right, well, I'm no angel I'll agree but Pansy, I'd never hurt you", Draco sounded as sincere as when he'd started to win her over, but Pansy's guard was up now.

"You've hurt me plenty", she ground out.

"Yep, I won't deny that, and yeah, I admit that you being gone has put you right up there in my mind. I can't stop thinking about you".

"Because you want to use me!" she was shouting again now, falling into the argument she felt he was desperate to have with her.

"I'd never use you", Draco put on his warm smile for her and took a step towards her. "All I want is to be able to go back to me and you, all those times we shared. All that playing". He crossed to her and again she was too easily trapped in to keep a distance.

Coming to stop a foot away from her he made to take her shoulders in his hands hesitantly like approaching a coiled snake.

"You could have me whenever you want, no waiting for me to make a move, I'd come running for you, for all of you". He slid his hands down her arms to her waist.

"And If I don't want to share you", she knew her words, grounded out through clenched teeth were falling on his deaf ears".

"You don't need to worry about that. I'd make sure you never know who or where".

Pansy bit her lip, this time it wasn't lust or temptation, it was in choosing which part of him to aim for first as he confirmed everything, she realised he wanted. He didn't want her with anyone but him, while he had freedom to chase whatever took his fancy.

"But I'd be yours", he purred into her ear, "publicly, privately, I wouldn't hide it". His hand slid down her back to the roundness of her rear. "Even betrothed…".

Pansy's eyes widened in shock. To even mention such an idea, Draco was too honour bound to throw out such words without intent. This was everything she'd been aiming for. A flash of her father came to her and words like, 'what she was groomed to do', seemed more appropriate.

In an instant her pupils dilated as she was transported into visions of triumph and perhaps even exoneration from her father. This was a job finally done and done well. It didn't matter how or why, as long as the task was complete. But now it could be and maybe, she could let go of some of that same fear that drove her away from her home.

"You must be bloody joking!" came a voice in Pansy's mind, so clear in fact that she even looked round to try and see where Tracey was, the voice sounding so real. Then Tracey's voice began to roar on and screech with unchecked emotions as she often did when she flew off the handle.

"Is that it then, job done, back off home to a man who'd sooner sell you off than love you, to a boy who'd sooner sew his oats while you rear his child? My Pansy wouldn't stand for a life like that".

The presence of Tracey reminded her that she was beyond such weakness now and that she was stronger than that. Her change in self, was a change in life, not just a changed attitude. This meant she couldn't allow herself to be pulled in. And she felt strong now, as strong as she knew her bond was with Tracey, as strong as Neville standing up to friends or bullies.

Then a different kind of strength hit her, like a calmness. And Snape's words too seemed to finally fit. Where did her true self begin and her years of falseness end. What kind of person was she willing to be as she finally accepted who she was in her new self.

As she felt it, she drew herself back from where Draco still lingered, arms wrapping around her waist. She felt she had finally discovered hiss attack, seen her own vulnerabilities, and recognised which game she was truly playing. She tried to find a word she'd heard before. Something she'd observed a boy say while she was sat languidly watching from afar as he destroyed someone on his chess board.

"Discovered Check", she breathed. "Bloody Weasley", she thought as she pictured his beautiful face.

"Hmm?", Draco murmured not hearing her.

Pansy pushed on his chest to create distance, but she was still cornered to the wall he was backing her into. "Stop", she said firmly. As she always admired about the boy, he was coercive and encouraging but never forceful with her. He pulled back instantly.

"Pansy don't be frigid", he reached out for her hand, but she snatched it away as anger flashed in her eyes. He was quicker though, and he pulled her back to him, getting close to her and whispered in her ear as he held on, "hey, hey, hey! I'm sorry, I didn't mean it".

"Your never going to understand this are you", she said, her voice now shaking with anger, Pansy pushed at him again, "I don't want this, and I don't want you!"

She was expecting a sadness to fill his eyes, but she saw them flash in anger as he fixed her with a rigid stare. A boy not getting his own way sprang to mind.

"You need to stop this, now", and for the first time he was shouting. "This crap with those tarts you hang around with, it stops. This isn't you, your not my Pansy anymore and it's wrong",

The rise in his voice made her flinch on reaction, she would have been ready to cower but not anymore, his reaction made her confidence skyrocket, she felt reckless.

"I never was your Pansy, she was! That weak thing that would have followed you anywhere, she might roll over for you, not me". Pansy realised she was smiling as she spoke, she saw the rise in his temper as he noticed, she didn't care.

"This is exactly what I'm talking about, they've poisoned you. Look at yourself, look at your real friends, they miss you, I miss you!"

Pansy knew she was over him, but that she would always have a slither of something in her heart. Even if it was the love for the soul of a boy whom she'd met at Eleven. And for a heartbeat she saw the sadness in his eyes, and it cut her. But again, it didn't last long.

"I'm done Draco!" She looked at the corridor and thought about leaving. "You and me, were never going to happen". Deciding on one last show of compassion she added softly, "and, for what it's worth, I am sorry".

She turned to leave and took a few steps.

"It's already out of your hands", he said flatly.

The weightlessness to his words chilled her and she hurried back, fixated on his eyes. "What do you mean? What's out of my hands?"

"I've already written to my farther, asking him to make an official approach to yours", Pansy struggled to read his face as he spoke. He was a mix of fear and triumph. "He knows your fathers depending on an offer of an allowance. He won't refuse".

"Why would you do that!" Pansy gripped onto his shoulders shaking him, "you can't do this Draco, we're not…you can't…".

She turned and steadied herself on the wall, she knew it was more than an idol threat, if he said he'd done it then he had. And if Lucius approached her father, and she knew he would, then that was it. She was Pureblood and more than that she was from a line of dark wizards who kept tradition. This arrangement would be absolute, and her own wishes be damned.

Anxiety pressed in on her from all angles and she struggled for air and felt her vision blur. "I can't stop this", she thought desperately. "I can't breathe…".

Draco rubbed her shoulders, "you'll come round, I'll honour you as my wife".

Something in Pansy snapped, a viciousness that she'd been holding onto for weeks now. She allowed it to release along with the tears that caught in her eyes. She felt a cold chill as a callousness awakened in her. The serpent reared back and flashed its fangs as it stretched and reset its jaw ready to strike once again. Pansy, the Slytherin, remembered who she was and aimed for his artery.

"Draco", Pansy ground out weakly, but steadying her voice all the while she spoke. "I really hope your lying about this", she let out a crazed cackle, "because I'm worried you really don't measure up anymore", she cruelly allowed her gaze to address him top to tail. The spark of nastiness that had been missing from her for a while now burned as the ember ignited.

Draco recoiled with disgust, as he saw her eyes linger below his waistline and the sad pout she offered him, it showed that in a simple moment, she had done more damage than a stray curse could ever do.

"Don't talk to me like that", he said darkly, stepping back from her.

"Why not", she recanted quickly, "you are my betrothed no? I need to make sure your enough for me, can you perform the duty dearest?"

"The hell are you saying!" Draco found anger again but she didn't flinch, "who have you been with?" he demanded.

Pansy blinked for a second as she failed to register the question. Then she recognised instantly that he had taken this the wrong way. She could have rectified it, but they were past that now and as he began to shout at her, her own anger grew in retaliation.

She had no desire to put him straight, to sooth his ego and act as pure as she truly was. She wanted to verbally back hand him away from her. Now in a flurry of lashing out, she let further damage fly.

"Use your imagination Draco, I've been trailing after you for so long, I had a lot of catching up to do. I couldn't just stop at giving it away once".

"Rubbish", Draco barked, "I'm not buying that. Little wallflower Parkinson turned school slut; I don't think so".

The fire, lit under her, erupted with fuel as that single word struck a nerve. In an instant she defiantly wanted it to be truer than anything she'd ever said to him before.

"Call me that again", she said gravely, her fingers finding the end of her wand.

"Little Whorekinson", he took a step towards her and grinned in Sinicism, "who's been having a go on you then. Or is that what you and your Dyke friend get up to, little gang of lesbians sitting around eating each other…".

There was a crack of sound that echoed as she'd abandoned her wand and let her hand fly, straight across his face. It left a glowing red mark that forced him to recoil away from her.

Draco snarled angrily and took a step towards her in seething rage, his fists clenched.

Instantly fear took struck. A mirror image of her father approaching, hand raised ready to rain down on her. But her defiance was wild now and she summoned all her anger, all her rage and began to shout at the top of her lungs. She screamed at the cruel boy, at her pig of a father, one and the same coming at her with violence.

"Go on hit me! Do it! See how the Gryffindors react when they see what you've done to their new favourite toy!".

Her words rang out through the corridor, it stopped him in his tracks, but she couldn't stop and carried on, now walking towards him as he began to back away from her advances.

"Not sure what I prefer taking, Mudblood's or Blood Traitors!" she carried on the assault, reversing him further until he was backed against the wall. "Then again, no one's ever hit quite as deep as Longbottom, perhaps Potter? that is until Weasley had me swearing blue murder, but he's that good it doesn't bother me that he can't afford to pay like the other's-…".

A second crack echoed out; this time Pansy reeled back clutching her face. Draco looked as pale as she'd ever seen him. Even in the darkness of the follow through she saw that he was bone white and sweating. He was clutching at the hand he'd struck her with like it had done so without his permission.

Her face was racked with a heavy numbness from the impact, but her whole body was so ablaze with adrenaline that she felt nothing but fire around her. She only had time to recognise the fear and hurt in his eyes as she turned and ran, disappearing into the thick white soup that swirled around them.

Pansy made it to the Main Hall as she ascended the dungeon, it was only then that she slowed to light pace as she recognised the time and the fact there would be prefect's patrolling. Now finding the adrenaline not to be as potent, pain began to spread out across her face.

Frowning angrily at the idea she'd now be dealing with her face stinging for an age she decided to leave the castle for the cold of the grounds. She accepted this in punishment of herself for her own stupidity. Pansy already had a flood of fears wash over her as she contemplated all the repercussions of what he'd done and furthermore, what she'd had done.

She pulled a small, folded sheet of fabric from her inside pocket and with a tap of her wand held out what was one of her smaller, emergency cloaks made pocket size by a convenient miniaturising transfiguration. She reverted it with the tap from her wand and deciding herself less brave than her own punishment demanded, fired up a warming charm on it as she threw it around herself.

Pansy pulled on the giant door, once outside, in an effort to close it. The subsequent clicks and knocks as it locked back into place were loud due to the size of the thing.

The noise made Ron turn around in shock, again his hand would have found his wand in the surprise had he not already had it in hand pointed to the sky. He froze as he locked eyes with Parkinson. She couldn't have been but a few moments behind him as he'd left the castle.

Pansy too was shocked to see Weasley as he stood, wand raised to the sky. A wayward eyebrow arched up in wander at the sight when a whirring whoosh sounded through the air. Pansy watched as his eyes widened and he dodged his head to the side, from behind something flew to where his head had just been, but now the thing continued towards her. She winced, recoiling on instinct to avoid being struck in the face by whatever it was.

No strike came and Pansy opened her eyes to see he had caught it and the object appeared only inches from her face. It turned out to be the broom she'd watched him carry around so much this year. The realisation that he'd been summoning it from what appeared to be the direction of the Quidditch pitch came to her, but it didn't stop her panting from the shock.

Ron stepped forwards to reach for her as she fell back but felt stupid as he did. He dropped the broom dispassionately as he stepped towards her, an apology on his lips but he never spoke it. As he neared her the outdoor sconces surrounding the door lit her face.

Ron's fingertips touched at her small, pointed chin as he upped her face to the light to get a better look at the angry red mark that was glowing on her white skin. A stoicism struck him as he traced a finger lightly across the handprint.

Pansy did nothing to hide the wince she felt as he touched her, staring up into his hard eyes, she saw they blazed an angry blue. She could see the angry thoughts that flashed tellingly across his face. They were of barbaric retribution, sweaty and blood smelling assaults of knuckle and fist across broken teeth and nose. To see such anger strike at him, for her benefit made her ears feel hot and her insides warm.

Then she frowned as she spotted his lip. It was freshly opened and as angry in colour as her own mark. While not as testosterone filled as she imagined his anger to be, she was pleasantly surprised to feel her own rage for whoever had put their hands on him.

Long moments went on unanswered as they both stayed frozen, each with a hand lingering near the others injury. They both knew that there had been a lot left unsaid between them recently and even more questions left to ask. Ron had feelings he didn't want to sit on anymore. Tonight was a bad night for such things, but he didn't care. But as he remained staring at her face, he decided he had nothing to give her, too battered and broken after such an ordeal.

Likewise, Pansy wanted to strike while they were alone, tell him she hated his guts but wanted to be wrapped in them all the same. She grimaced at the idea of such a thought, but then when she opened her mouth, she saw how sad his beautiful blue eyes looked tonight. Reaching to him Pansy drew the back of her fingers down his cheek, if she couldn't speak, she wanted to make him feel some of what she had struggled to put into words, those things she'd been feeling ever stronger for him recently.

Seeing his reaction to her touch she felt vulnerably aware of how much she was battling the weakness that wracked her body. The altercation in the Dungeon had left her scarred emotionally, she wondered if silence was a bad thing after all.

Ron closed his eyes as he took in the feeling of her touching him, he'd never felt anything so caring even after the tender reassurances from Hermione, somehow this didn't compare. Ron looked around, he didn't know what time it was, but he knew they were alone and right now he wanted to keep it that way.

Pansy stood perplexed as he turned his back to her and walked away. By now she'd truly lost her voice and doubted she could shout to him if she needed. She watched as he stood over his broom and without a word, held out his hand and commanded it up.

Broom in hand Ron returned. He walked behind her and guided her back to be pressed into his chest. He delighted in the feel of her bristling as he caught the hitch in her throat. With a reassuring squeeze of her shoulder, he lifted his leg and slid his broom under them both.

Pansy stilled as she realised; he was seating her on his broom. The notion alarmed her but then she recalled Tracey relaying that the word on the pitch was that he was something of a dark horse in the air. Feeling brave and foolish enough to trust him on this she let him guide her. Doing as she was led to; she gently leaned her full weight back as she sat on the thing. Pansy stopped, standing back up she turned to him, pulling off her cloak. With a whisper she tapped it again with her wand, now it grew to be twice the size. She threw it over him and tied it, then leaning back she had him pass her the ends and she tucked them in, wrapping them both up.

Pansy felt the weight shift as he too lowered his full weight onto the broom. The thing gently bobbed as it remained levitating three feet off the ground. She was surprised at the lack of discomfort realising it was well made and supportive. Then he leaned forward, his left hand gripping it tightly, his right snaked around her and pulled her into him, locking them together.

Pansy rode wonderful waves of rigidity as his actions continued to surprise her. He could feel his fingers settling on her stomach and the solid frame of his chest pressing into her back. Her eyes repeatedly lulled in the warmth that this sudden amount of contact brought.

Ron pushed off with a constant eye on the smoothness of flight, knowing he only had one chance at not cocking it up he soon got them some twenty feet in the air with a gentle pace. Whatever enchantments on her cloak kept him warm and comfortable. Then as he looked down, he took in the full notion that he was now alone with her, in a setting of his own making, with no prying eyes.

Pansy's eyes were wide and fearful as they moved up and out into the grounds. She realised this was a horrible idea for any form of first date. But very quickly she began to ease into trusting his skill. She imagined it was taking a great deal of concentration on his part, to move so fluidly and without turbulence. Then her eyes widened again as she felt a heavy and purposeful weight on the back of her head. Taking a glance, she saw, and felt, that he had drooped to rest his chin on her head. There was a moment of trepidation, but it was fleeting. Pansy felt for his arm around her. Sliding her hand to his she found his fingers and laced them with her own. As she did, feeling as his thumb absently passed back and forth over her smaller fingers, lightly caressing them. With every pass she felt a spark run through her arm.

Ron had taken to remaining some twenty feet from the ground in long looping turns that were so smooth they were unnoticeable. It became a star lit tour of the grounds at night, a route he'd taken several times before. This all running in the background of his mind, he was free to let go and remain in the moment with her.

Feeling her wrap his fingers around her own hand, pulling his arm to holding her tighter, he started to understand the differences of feeling the touch of a girl he was attracted to and a girl who was making him feel magic fire through his body. For the first time he felt he was free to enjoy an intimacy that they'd both chosen to share in each other, and the sensation was absolute.

Pansy had the cloak pulled tightly around them both, it wrapped up and over her shoulders and round to shield her face. As she tucked her chin into it, she watched through the window of fabric at what was becoming a magical, exhilarating ride in the skies. He had remained as sure handed as when they set off and the ride couldn't have been smoother. But as she felt his strong arm lock her in place, she braced herself.

Gasping in surprise she watched as his hand pushed the tip of the broom down and the ground came into view. The angle was steep enough that they picked up speed, but not so harshly that it did little more than quicken the blood for a few moments. Like a ride he once heard Dean telling them that Muggles went on for thrills and excitement, Ron emulated similar movements. Flying steadily higher in smooth circles only to push them both back down in a mild thrill of bustling wind and threatening danger.

Pansy grabbed at his arms as his movements, still as smooth as ever, became that bit more daring. She imagined to him this was tranquil, but she was no flier, and the experience was filling her with adrenaline.

This time though, she swallowed those adrenal blasts and embraced the light headedness of the highs it brought. She trusted his movements and allowed herself to trust in the experience. As she did, she found each gentle dive thrilled her. Soon she was pushing the cloak off her face and delighted in feeling the wind on her skin.

Ron could feel her body answering him as he silently asked her to show him where her limit was. The tiny gasps he heard her make told him when it was electrifying her. Where she might tighten against him, pointed to the areas where her nerves picked up. From that he knew where her resolve reached and kept them within that boundary so that she could simply enjoy the flight as he did.

Ron dipped them down so that their feet could just brush gently over the tips of the trees in the Forbidden Forest. He took them as far out as he could, winding through the air and showing her every sight worth seeing.

After he took them for a desperately low pass over the placid Black Lake, Pansy felt them rise. They continued up, higher now than they'd been. Soon she felt the chill of clouds disperse as they passed through them. She could feel that they straightened out and slowed. She hadn't realised as he turned them, that they'd stopped. Levitating so high in the air her gaze followed the direction he turned them and saw from a huge distance, their school in all its entirety.

Pansy's eyes widened; she'd never seen Hogwarts from such an angle. To be so high up, easily half a mile away into the surrounding grounds. Its picture mirrored in the stillness of the lake; the vast castle twinkled like its own constellation in the heavens.

They moved on, heading back towards the immediate grounds. As they flew along, he leaned his head down and rested his cheek against hers. She told him she accepted by leaning into him.

She closed her eyes against the sensation as they started to nuzzle their faces into each other. Inside pieces of Pansy were crying out at the overwhelming passions he had lit within her. She leaned her head back to rest in the crook of his neck.

Pansy's eyes still closed; she was instantly taken by every sensation. Deep arousal heightened everything further. These sensations she'd never felt before, the boy pressing her body into him. Coiling himself around her, his face and head moving over hers in deliberate caress and the feel of the warm delicate wind as it whipped at her face.

She was flying, and he was flying with her, holding her into the air and demanding that she remain there with him.

Ron's mind felt limitless. The moment they were sharing lingered on, and he could have stayed there for an age, drinking her in. Living off her touch and yet there was more. And yet, somewhere there, more boldness could be found.

He lowered his face to her, pushing his cheek to hers. He felt her head turn slowly towards his own, allowing her body to move in response to his. Her breath, even up here, was tangible as he felt her so close to his face. She was meeting him now, eyes closed he fell into the deafness of the silence that now surrounded him.

Pansy closed her eyes once more, drowning in this sensation of flight. She felt his body as it coaxed her into turning to him. She felt his face trace back and forth against hers and it pulled at her. There was an attraction there now. Stronger than the one they felt for each other. The attraction was a forceful pull. Pansy felt it as it guided her lips to where his waited.

Pansy's lips followed where his led. Her eyes still closed she knew, in her stomach that his were too. His forehead leaned against hers and she felt that force again, stronger than she'd ever felt. She knew his lips were a parchments width from hers.

In the darkness, in flight, together, their lips fell.

-End-

-Authors notes-

Hi to everyone who made it to the end. If you did then, 'wow' thanks for sticking with it and hope it was enjoyable enough.

So firstly, this is an end point for this story for myself, as of right now (you could say paused). I want to get on with the other story's that I've had more structured stuck in my head while writing this with the hope that I then come back to this. The other side is to see if there's a point, this is my first sizable Fic and I've put in over 100k in words and a ton of time juggling a busy life and I don't want to presume I'm writing anything that anyone enjoys but it would be nice to know its pulled anyone alone who wants more. If that's the case then there's so much in this story I touched on that hasn't come full circle yet. To that end there will be another chapter directly after this already complete. Its just that, as I realised, directly at the point the silent flight took its inevitable turn seemed a better place to Pause then where the story directly continues.

I was honest at the beginning of this when I mentioned that there is a large hole, that being a lack of a true structured plot in my head and its shown in the pace of this. It's been very day to day heavy but its also been quite fluent while writing it so its been an odd one that's been fun to write as its surprised me at times with which direction the story turned.

I'd love to hear from anyone who got to the end of this, so please do leave a review and let me know if more of this would be welcome and all constructive comments welcome.

I've learnt a lot writing this, mostly about my own writing and where I've fallen foul of myself and so on so I've took a lot on that hopefully will better anything new that I post.

Thanks and much love.