The Sword and the Shield

by sunspid3r

A man who's too strong for love, meets a woman far too soft for war. But Levi should know better than anyone that looks can be deceiving, because behind that pretty face, there's a lifetime of secrets waiting to rear their ugly heads only in the face of despair. If there's such a thing as fate, she's a fickle little whore. [Levi X Fem!OC, Slow Burn, NSFW, sun/moon trope supremacy]

7. Chapter 7 - Wildflower and Barley

Chapter Seven - Wildflower and Barley

"You shouldn't be getting so close to that guy, Quinn. He's dangerous."

Sairam waited until he was sure the two were out of earshot before making his first snide comment, sitting down next to their squad's sleeping bags. Quinn pours a generous amount of water onto a white cloth, wringing out the excess liquid before folding it up and handing it to him. "I don't know what the hell happened between you two, but I think you're wrong."

"You weren't there." Sairam says defensively. He examines the rag in his hand before offering it back to her. "Could you help? I can't exactly see my own face."

Quinn grinds her teeth together, biting back the word 'no' as she takes the cloth and presses it against Sairam's bruised cheek. She deliberately adverts her gaze from his, feeling uncomfortable as his eyes beg for contact. She isn't about to grant him the intimate moment he was searching for. "There, if you hold it right here, you should be fine."

Sairam begrudgingly replaces Quinn's hand with his own. "Thanks." he mumbles, his voice muffled by the swelling in his face.

"If Levi is such a dangerous person, then tell me what happened."

Her interrogation causes Sairam to shift his eyes to the side. "I don't know. I was just trying to lighten the mood, and then he snapped. Started saying a bunch of crazy shit about me, even insulting you a couple of times."

"Insulting me?" Quinn feels a slight twist in her stomach. "What did he say?"

"He called you stupid. Said you were a coward and an idiot."

Sairam's words make Quinn feel a bit disheartened. It isn't exactly hard to believe that Levi would say that — she just now managed to have her first "normal" conversation with the guy, and even that didn't consist of much on his part. She had thought that his lack of response when she asked if he wanted her to leave him alone might have been a genuine sign that he didn't, but it could've also been out of pity. Still, she's pretty sure there are parts of the story Sairam is leaving out. "So why did he end up hitting you?"

"Because I was defending you!" Sairam's tone rises slightly, causing him to wince at the strain in his jaw. "I tried to tell him he was wrong, but he didn't listen. Then when I wouldn't be quiet, he kicked me in the mouth."

That part she does believe — at least, the part about Sairam not being able to keep his mouth shut. The picture he's painting isn't exactly unbelievable. Despite how much she doesn't want to believe it, Levi very well could have said those things unprovoked.

Regardless, Quinn decides she's had enough of the conversation and pulls herself to her feet. "You should be able to baby your injury with that until we get back to HQ. Just pour some more water on it if it gets warm."

"Wait–" Sairam stops her before she can take a single step. "You're not really going back over there with him, are you?"

"I have to. Because of your little incident, Flagon put me in charge of watching him for the rest of the trip."

Sairam turns away, his expression filled with frustration. "Great. Just great. I get hurt, and Flagon responds by getting you two nice and comfortable instead."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Quinn seethes, utterly appalled by Sairam's implication.

"You two were snuggled up by the fire having tea. You tell me."

Quinn scoffs in disbelief. "I was showing him something in my journal — just trying to explain something to him! And why the hell would you have the right to get upset about something like that, anyway?"

"I'm–" Sairam starts to stutter as he scrambles for a response. "I'm just trying to protect you!"

"I told you before, Sairam. I don't need your protection. I'm not your property or your responsibility. You have no right to be so dramatic and twist the situation to fit some stupid narrative in your head."

Without giving Sairam a chance to respond, Quinn turns around and heads back to her own area, her feet heavy with frustration as she walks.

︎***

It was only a few minutes later that Flagon called everyone to morning assembly.

Quinn was apparently on super babysitting duty today. She was tasked with guiding some of the newer cadets through a few standard procedures — Levi's group included. She didn't mind, though. Quinn enjoyed teaching and getting to help the less experienced soldiers develop their skills. She walked them through basic things like conducting small area patrols, locating sources of freshwater, setting up temporary watchtowers — all of the more lackluster responsibilities that come with being a Scout.

Levi, of course, spent his time lingering near Isabel and Furlan. He hadn't spoken a word to Quinn ever since she left with Sairam — in fact, he hardly acknowledged her presence at all. Any time Quinn would so much as glance his direction, Levi was focused on anything else but her. Normally, she would have a problem with someone neglecting these lessons, but she knew Levi was capable enough without them. The same couldn't be said for the litter of teenagers that were dumped into her lap — they were her real priority. She had less than two weeks now to get them as prepared as she could for their first expedition.

Even during their evening supper Levi stayed completely silent, listening to Isabel and Quinn chatter about the forest around them. Isabel would point out various things and ask questions, and Quinn would answer them effortlessly. Furlan made a couple of comments himself, though he wasn't a huge participant in the conversation.

And not to Quinn's surprise, Sairam was nowhere to be found.

He could pout as long as he wanted to for all she cared. At this point, Quinn is kind of glad Levi knocked the shit out of him. His subsequent behavior was nothing but a clear indication that he deserved it.

But she still can't stop thinking about what Sairam said — about what Levi might have said.

Levi never gave her much to go off of one way or the other. Even in conversation, the man was a complete mystery. The uncertainty almost felt worse than the thought of him outright hating her.

Almost.

Before Flagon dismissed everyone for the night, he assigned his squad's watch shifts accordingly. Not to Quinn's surprise, she and Levi were paired together for the first shift of the night.

The dry foliage beneath Quinn's feet crackles and snaps as she makes her way toward their lookout spot, pulling her cloak snug around her figure before sitting down. Levi had taken a minute to return to his group's area, so she told him to meet her there, even though he was technically still under her supervision.

Quinn still isn't sure what she's supposed to be watching for. It's not like Levi was jumping at his first chance to hurt Sairam — and even if he were, it's not like she could stop him.

Levi shows up only a few minutes later, coming to a stop a few feet away without a word. Unlike Quinn, he stays on his feet, crossing his arms and shifting his weight onto one leg.

After a moment of silence, Quinn decides to speak up. "Are you not gonna sit down?"

Levi glances over at her with his nose wrinkled up in disgust. "I'm not sitting in the dirt like some animal."

Quinn lets out a heavy sigh and tries to make her eye-roll as subtle as possible. "I get that you have an aversion to dirt, trust me, but if you're gonna be a Scout, you're gonna have to get a bit more familiar with the outdoors. Otherwise, you're gonna drive yourself crazy." She pauses and reaches down, brushing her hand against the ground beneath her. "It's not like the dirt in the Underground. The soil won't cling to your clothes as long as you're on the grass. Unless it's muddy, of course."

"... But won't the grass stain the pants?"

There isn't a damn thing Quinn can do to suppress the laughter that erupts from her belly, slapping one of her hands over her mouth in vain. Her frantic giggling causes Levi's face to turn beet red, his features twisting into a furious glare.

Suddenly, her laughter is abruptly silenced as Levi yanks the collar of her shirt, tangling it in his fist and jerking Quinn upward. Her hand latches onto his forearm just a split second later, gripping onto him with enough strength to snap an average person's arm. The force seems to startle him, causing something in his eyes to waver for a moment.

She stares up at Levi with wide eyes, the corners of her mouth twitching up into a smile. "We can do this again, if you want. But I promise, it's not gonna be as cut and dry as it was last time."

Levi appears to be growing more furious by the second, and for a moment Quinn worries that she might actually have a fight on her hands. But to her surprise, Levi releases his grip, walks a couple steps to the side, and very carefully sits himself down with a huff.

"If I see so much as a single mark on these pants, it's your ass."

Quinn lets out a ghost of a laugh, trying her best not to look too victorious. This was a good sign. If Levi was really upset, he'd surely have just knocked her on her ass and been done with it.

The two sit in silence for a while, with Quinn opting to pick at the grass while the minutes ticked away. It doesn't take long for the boredom to set in, and eventually Quinn can't help but try and seek out conversation again.

"I hope today wasn't too painful for you."

Levi doesn't respond immediately, and Quinn starts to think he's just going to ignore her, but he doesn't. "It was fine."

A particularly strong gust of wind sweeps over Quinn's back, causing her to pull her cloak tighter around her shoulders, feeling the lingering cold of the early spring air.

"Are you cold?" Levi asks from her left. It doesn't sound like he's asking out of concern — the sarcasm is evident in his voice.

It's true that everyone else seemed perfectly comfortable in this weather, but Quinn has always been more sensitive to cooler temperatures. Embarrassingly so.

"Just getting comfortable."

Levi hums and turns his attention forward with empty eyes, when something seems to grab his attention. He points to the sky hastily. "What was that?"

Quinn raises her head and glances in the direction that he's pointing. She can't see anything out of the ordinary. "What was what?"

"This light, it was like a — there, that. What the hell is that?"

Quinn catches sight of a brief flash of movement – a small white streak of light that's gone in a flash. She knows exactly what it is. "Oh! A shooting star! They say that if you see one, you're supposed to make a wish."

"A wish?" Levi asks skeptically.

"Yeah, a wish is—"

"I know what a wish is, I'm not stupid."

A sly smirk spreads across Quinn's face. "What, you above making wishes or something?"

Levi's eyes remain fixated on the sky. "Kind of."

"Oh, c'mon. It's not like it's gonna hurt anything."

"I wish I wasn't here right now."

Quinn gives him an annoyed look before turning her gaze back at the sky. "You're not supposed to say it out loud. Now it won't come true."

"Then what's the point?"

A defeated sigh leaves her lips. "Just to make yourself feel better, I guess – try to manifest something good."

She stares up at the sky and decides to make her own silent wish – a wish for her comrades, and their safety.

She's wished for it before, but that won't stop her from trying again.

A few more quiet moments pass when Quinn's thoughts begin to wander. One of Levi's responses — 'I'm not stupid' — reminds her of the conversation she had with Sairam that morning. "So, can I ask you again what happened last night?"

"What did he tell you?"

Levi's immediate response catches Quinn off guard. She chews on the inside of her cheek as she contemplates how to respond. "He said that he was just 'trying to lighten the mood', but then you snapped on him and insulted me in the process. Then when he defended me, you kicked him in the face." She keeps her tone flat, trying to make it evident that she was still neutral on the subject.

Levi doesn't look at all surprised at Sairam's version of events. "Did he tell you what I said that was so insulting?"

"He said that you called me an idiot and a coward."

"Hm," Levi pauses for a second in consideration. "Yeah, I did say that."

Quinn is taken aback by how casual Levi is about his response. "Wh— But why?"

"I told him you were a coward for not telling him to piss off and that you aren't going to sleep with him."

What was once a state of shock is quickly turning into revulsion. "Sleep with him? Why the hell would I have to tell him that?"

Levi turns his head and looks at her directly for the first time tonight. "And that's why you're an idiot."

"Can you please elaborate for once?"

"Don't try to tell me you don't see it. He relies on you like you're his mommy and patronizes you as if you were an infant at the same time – and you let him."

As much as Quinn hates what Levi is saying, he isn't exactly wrong.

That only makes it feel worse.

"I'm not anyone's mother."

"Then fucking act like it." Levi spits. "You do everybody else's work at the drop of a hat without question. You act like all of these damn Scouts are your responsibility, especially those new cadets."

Quinn's agitation rises in sync with his. "What's it to you if I want to try and help my comrades?"

"Doing their work for them isn't helping them, and it isn't going to stop them from getting killed."

"Screw you." Quinn shoots up to her feet so fast that she nearly loses her balance. "You don't know a damn thing about me or my squad. You have no idea what they can do — what I can do. "I'm done being your damn chaperone. Flagon can chew me out all he wants, I'm going to bed."

She retreats furiously back to camp, choking down a Titan-sized lump in her throat and wiping away the sting from the corners of her eyes. Even after she burrows herself deep inside her sleeping bag, Quinn can feel those ghosts of the past looming over her.

She spends her entire night hiding from them.

*︎**

One week before the expedition

Quinn made sure to avoid Levi at all costs.

It wasn't difficult, considering how the man already avoided human interaction like the plague. She would only catch glimpses of him during briefings and meals, being overwhelmed with her own set of responsibilities as the expedition crept closer and closer. She was given a few more opportunities to work with the new cadets, and their progress was better than Quinn could've imagined. It actually brought her some newfound hope, pushing the doubts that Levi had given her out of her mind completely.

Despite the sour attitude between Quinn and that aforementioned grump, Isabel was still as kind as ever. She wasn't hesitant about coming to Quinn with any concerns she had about the things going on around her. It made her just the slightest bit grateful that Levi was at least above trying to influence his friends to avoid her.

Things between Quinn and Sairam had gone back to normal for the most part. He did seem a little more reluctant to ask her for help, which was the one small benefit she had gotten out of that stressful trip.

This weekend was bound to be a lot more lighthearted, and it was a much needed break that Quinn looked forward to every year.

"So, Quinn, are you gonna be coming into town with us this weekend?" Freya inquires from across the table, her spoon stirring idly in her porridge.

Isabel's voice rings out from a few seats down, interrupting Quinn before she gets the chance to respond. "What's this weekend?"

Quinn turns her attention to the younger girl, who's sat directly in between her two male counterparts. "There's going to be a festival in Trost to celebrate the spring equinox."

"A festival?" Isabel repeats the word thoughtfully. "I've never been to one! What's it like?"

"People decorate the streets with a bunch of different flowers, and set up special merchant stalls. There's a lot of music and food and—"

"And booze!" Sairam interjects from Quinn's side. "Lots and lots of booze."

A look of excitement quickly spreads across Isabel's face. "Can we go? Are we allowed?"

Quinn pauses for a moment and takes a sip of her tea. "I can ask Flagon to confirm, but I don't see why not."

Isabel quickly turns to her left to face Levi. "Can we go, bro? Pleaseee? Pretty please?"

Levi grimaces at the question, clearly less than enthused about the idea.

"I can take her," Quinn suggests thoughtfully. "If you guys just want to stay–"

"No." Levi cuts her off. He looks over at Isabel, the girl's eyes sparking with anticipation. His scowl hardens even more.

"We'll go."

"Yayy!" Isabel exclaims as she throws an arm around Levi's shoulder. "You're the best, bro!"

The idea of taking another small trip with Levi leaves Quinn feeling more than uneasy. She still feels the lingering resentment towards him for his insensitive comments, but she tries not to think about that and instead focuses on the idea of getting to show Isabel something new — something pretty. It's a small silver lining that she'll be holding onto all the way up until Saturday.

︎***

Five days before the expedition

Levi can't believe he actually agreed to this.

He curses himself for being so weak and giving into Isabel's wishes, though it wouldn't be the first time he's willingly put himself through hell for the girl's happiness. With all of the shit they've been through since their arrival, she deserved to have a nice experience. Plus, they've been put to work so hard lately that some time away from headquarters actually sounds somewhat appealing.

Being in a crowd does not.

The three had been informed that the group would be leaving late in the morning, as the ride to Trost took a little over an hour. They were also told that they were welcome to wear their civilian clothes, so Levi was dressed in the same outfit he had on when he arrived. The same went for Isabel and Furlan, and Levi is just now realizing that they only own one set of street clothes each.

He'll change that once they get out of here. He'll make sure to get them something nice, something they deserve for suffering through all of this bullshit with him.

The three had retrieved their horses and were waiting in the courtyard with another small group of Scouts. It seemed they weren't the only ones planning to go into town today. Freya was the first to arrive, followed by Sairam just a couple of minutes later. They were both dressed in modest attire — Freya in a tan blouse and a brown skirt, and Sairam in a gray button up with what seemed to be his white uniform pants.

'Lazy', Levi thinks to himself.

"So, we're just waiting on Quinn now?" Sairam asks Freya as he approaches the group.

"Seems like it."

The man lets out a laugh. "You think she's doing her little princess routine again?"

Freya responds with a firm elbow to Sairam's side. "I wish you'd stop doing that. So what if she wants to feel pretty for the festival? You don't even put in half the effort into your appearance."

"Aw, c'mon," Sairam says as he rubs the tender spot on his ribs. "Quinn knows it's all in good fun. You know she only dresses like that because she likes the atte— ah, there she is!"

Quinn already has her middle finger directed towards Sairam as she walks over, evidently already anticipating his teasing. She's dressed an off-white peasant gown, a red overdress accentuating her waist. Her normally tied up hair is draped down her shoulders, the front section pulled back and secured with a ribbon. There's a soft pink tint spread across her lips and cheeks, and her eyelashes look more full than usual.

It isn't exactly over the top, but Freya was definitely right — she put a hell of a lot more effort into her appearance than the others.

If anyone had told Levi that a woman like that would be able to put up a decent fight against him, he'd tell them they were insane.

Sairam ignores Quinn's snubbing and throws an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into an awkward half-hug. For a brief moment, Levi can see Sairam giving him a conniving side eye.

That little shit is actually calling his bluff.

If they weren't in the middle of this damn courtyard, surrounded by unfamiliar soldiers, he'd show Sairam exactly why that's a bad idea. However, Quinn doesn't look as uncomfortable as she did before. If anything, the gesture actually makes her smile.

That should put Levi's mind at ease, but it doesn't. If anything, it makes him more irritated that she's still buying into Sairam's bullshit. When he looks away from the two, Furlan is giving him that same wary look. Levi almost wants to smack it off of him.

Their ride to Trost was relatively uneventful. It had reached midday by the time they got into town, and just as Levi feared, the streets were packed with patrons. Quinn managed to find a nearby Garrison base that allowed them to board their horses, before she started leading them through the crowd. While everyone else had dispersed, Isabel was glued to Quinn's side. That meant by association, Furlan and Levi were too.

There were brightly colored banners strung along the nearby buildings, with various different stalls lining the streets. The food selection was scarce, but there were plenty of flowers and miscellaneous trinkets being sold. Quinn had offered — no, insisted on buying a few handfuls of flowers for Isabel, weaving several blooms through the girl's short hair. Isabel returned the favor, having a lot more hair to work with on Quinn's end, and the girls ended up with more petals in their hair than there were on the damn sidewalk.

Their unrelenting laughter did test his nerves a bit, but Levi had never seen Isabel smile this much before. He knows that she never really had any female influence in her life, so watching her get to just be a girl was… satisfying. Quinn had a way of bringing out that side of her that neither Levi nor Furlan could ever match up to. All they could do was trail behind the two as Quinn led Isabel all around the city.

Freya and Sairam found their way back to the group just as the sun was beginning to set, meeting up in an outdoor area adjacent to a nearby tavern. Loud music spilled from inside the building, blending with the sound of idle chatter. The crowd had died down a bit from earlier, but there were still far more people than Levi was comfortable with.

The outdoor area was next to an overpass that offered an impressive view of the city, one that beckoned Isabel and the others to the edge of the railing. The younger girl gazed out at the cityscape with a look of amazement.

"Is it like this where you're from, Quinn?" Isabel asks, watching as a collection of lights begin to shine from the buildings below.

"Oh no, Shiganshina is a lot more modest. The buildings are a lot smaller, and most of the roads are unpaved." Quinn replies as she takes her own spot next to Isabel. "But I gotta say, I think we throw a better festival. There's plenty more land for wildflowers."

"Do you have family there?"

Levi almost wants to stop Isabel before she starts her string of personal questions, but a part of him is interested in Quinn's answer.

Even if he already knows a great bit from snooping through her personal file.

"I do," Quinn answers without hesitation. "I have my dad, my mom, and my little brother Jericho. My mom grew up on a farm, so she owns a shop where she makes home goods from other local farmers. My dad is a craftsman, and he sells some of his woodwork there too. They're kind of a cornerstone of the city, so as far as life in Wall Maria goes, we're more fortunate than others."

Isabel looks genuinely impressed by Quinn's response. "Wow. That sounds really nice."

"Things could definitely be worse." Quinn says, doing her best to sound modest. "We launch all of our missions from Shiganshina, so you guys will get to see it on our way out. I can take you to see the shop some time."

The younger girl's face beams with excitement. She opens her mouth to respond, when the group spots Sairam approaching with two mugs in hand.

He shamelessly interrupts the conversation by extending one of the mugs to Quinn. "Here, I got you your favorite."

Quinn looks a bit stunned as she accepts the drink from his hand. "Oh, thank you. You really didn't have to do that."

"Oh please, you really think I would let you get away with not drinking with me tonight?"

The thought of Quinn drinking with Sairam doesn't sit right with Levi. He already knows she's a pushover by nature, and there's a good chance Sairam will try to push her past her limits.

Coupled with Sairam's well-known affection for her raises numerous red flags in Levi's mind.

"What is that?" Isabel asks curiously as she gazes down at Quinn's cup.

"It's mead. It's kind of like beer, but sweeter."

Isabel's eyes light up with interest. "Ooooh, can I try it?"

"Are you even old enough to drink?"

"Yes!" Isabel exclaims defensively. "I'm 17. I'm more than old enough."

A soft laugh leaves Quinn's lips as she hands the mug to Isabel. "Barely. But here, you can try it."

Isabel takes the drink and eagerly takes a sip, her eyes widening in surprise as the sweet yet bitter alcohol coats her tongue. She hands the mug back over to Quinn. "Okay, I have to get one of those."

"Isabel…" Levi's voice emerges as a warning, though he knows there isn't much he can do to stop her. She's been drunk before, and she is technically old enough. Not to mention, the military did provide them with their first stipend just the other day. "Don't go crazy."

"I'm not, bro!" Isabel attempts to reassure him, already making her way toward the front doors of the tavern. "Furlan, do you want one?"

The blonde next to Levi shrugs his shoulders. "Sure."

"Yeah!" Isabel exclaims with a smile. "What about you, Levi?"

Levi's nose turns up slightly at the offer. He's usually not a big fan of alcohol. "Do they have tea?"

"Oh, c'mon bro! You gotta try it!"

"It's made with honey." Quinn adds apprehensively – a reminder of the conversation they had last weekend.

The last thing Levi wants is both Isabel and Quinn on his back. Plus, he might be just a little bit curious about how it tastes. If honey is something that can pair well with tea, this might be something worth trying. At least, to appease them.

"Fine."

Isabel's smile broadens even further before she vanishes into the bar, returning eagerly with three mugs just a couple of minutes later. She hands a cup to both Levi and Furlan.

Levi can feel the eyes of both girls on him as he hesitantly takes his first sip, and it's better than he expected. The harsh taste of alcohol is definitely there, but the unique sweetness compliments it nicely.

Once again, when Levi lowers his cup, he finds wide, curious eyes fixated on him — only this time, there are twice as many.

"It's okay," Levi says begrudgingly. "I wouldn't drink a lot of it, but it's tolerable."

Isabel seems happy with Levi's small amount of approval, while Quinn looks like she's trying to suppress a smile, attempting to hide it behind her own cup. Sairam, still standing close to her, tries to hide the resentment on his face.

Isabel didn't seem too keen on spending time with Quinn while Sairam was around, so she slowly gravitated back toward Levi and Furlan. Her and the blonde were engaged in their own menial conversation about the festival, while Levi stood idly to the side. He can't help but keep a watchful eye on the two still mingling by the bridge, noticing how Sairam gets closer and closer with every drink that appears in Quinn's hands. He's been keeping count in his head: one, two, three, four different mugs make their rounds. As Quinn finishes the remnants of her most recent cup, Levi can see a slight sway in her stature, her face flushed a deep red. She's giggling senselessly as Sairam rambles about something Levi can't quite understand. He does hear the words "pretty" and "cute" a couple of times. Too many times.

Sairam begins to offer her another drink, and Levi almost makes a move to stop him, but Quinn takes the initiative herself. "M' thinkin' we should start heading out, guys." she announces to the group. "We gotta- gotta ride for a whole hour to get back."

"Can you even ride a horse in the state you're in?" Sairam asks with a smug laugh. Quinn looks back at him with uncertainty, to which he responds, "Don't worry, you can ride with me."

"But Tilly–"

"We'll hook up Tilly like we do the spare horses. She'll be fine."

That seems to be sufficient enough of an answer for Quinn to accept. Everyone else agrees to leave, the wear and tear of the day beginning to take its toll on them. Levi wasn't particularly fold of the idea of Quinn riding with Sairam, but it appeared to be their best option. Freya had disappeared earlier with a different group, and Isabel was lucky enough to be able to hold herself up. Not to mention, neither Levi or Furlan was a fan of the idea of a drunk person slumped over on their back for an hour.

That doesn't mean Levi wouldn't do it, if she really needed it. He would. Especially since there's still something unsettling about watching Quinn grip Sairam's waist like it's the only thing keeping her upright, and the smug expression on the man's face as she does so.

Levi grips his reins just a little bit harder.

It's late at night by the time they make it back to headquarters, the light of the moon offering just enough visibility for the group to reach the stables without issue. The ride there only seemed to disorient Quinn even further, her state of mind quickly changing from giggly to sleepy. She nearly trips a couple of times, and Sairam ends up supporting her until they enter the dim light of HQ's main hall.

"M'fine from here Sairam, really." Quinn's voice drags as slowly as her feet, still swaying as she tries to maintain her balance.

Sairam doesn't look convinced, attempting to place Quinn's arm back around his shoulder. "No no, don't worry. I'll make sure you get back to your room safely."

That makes one red flag too many.

"No."

Everyone looks shocked at Levi's protest, including Quinn, despite in her inebriated state.

"What's the problem?" Sairam asks, clearly becoming agitated. "Can't you see she can barely walk?"

"I can, but you're not gonna be the one taking her back to her room."

Sairam's body tenses in frustration. "And why not? Are you suggesting she wouldn't be safe with me?"

"I can do it, bro," Isabel offers from Levi's side. "I can–"

"No." Levi cuts her off. "You're drunk too. You'll fall right over with her."

Furlan is the next one to speak up. "But I could-"

"You need to help Isabel back to her own bed."

Sairam takes a couple of steps toward Levi, the tension in the room rapidly escalating. "And why should I believe she'll be any safer with you? Seems a bit suspicious to me that you're offering to escort a drunk woman you barely know."

"I'm not the one who's been shoveling drinks into her all night. Unlike you, I don't need to get my women drunk to spark their interest."

Sairam's temper quickly escalates. "You little–"

"Hey," Isabel interrupts the two men, stumbling over her own intoxicated words. "Why don't you just ask Quinn herself?"

"Fine." Sairam quickly turns back to the woman beside him, exuding confidence in what her answer will be. "Quinn, who do you want to help you? Some jackass you barely know, or me?"

Quinn looks at each of the men with uncertainty, clearly uncomfortable with being put on the spot. This was such a stupid idea – leaving this decision up to somebody so wasted that she can't tell her right from her left. Sairam has been doting on her all night, of could she would end up picking–

"Levi."

Everyone looks at Quinn in shock, and Levi is no exception. Even if she were sober, he would never believe that she'd trust him more than she does Sairam – especially considering how their last conversation went.

Maybe there were even more red flags that Levi hadn't seen, but she did.

Either that, or she's a lot more drunk than he originally thought.

"Wh- Quinn, are you sure? It's me. You barely know this guy, for all you know he could–"

"Enough." Levi interrupts Sairam in a firm tone. "You heard the girl."

The other man looks from Quinn, to Levi, and then back to Quinn, obviously offended. "Fine. Be like that. I'll remember this the next time you need someone to help your wasted ass."

It's obvious that Sairam's words hurt Quinn's feelings, even more so with her exaggerated emotional state. "Sairam, I'm sorry–"

The man is already stomping away in anger, interrupting whatever apology Quinn was about to offer. It makes her look even more broken-hearted, her face forming a frown that's downright pitiful.

"Come on," Levi groans as he walks toward her, pulling her arm over his shoulder impatiently. "I don't have all night."

The woman offers no protest as Levi guides her down the hallway. He can smell the alcohol on her — a bitter aroma that's both pungent and sweet. "Were you trying to drink the whole damn bar?"

"It's rude to say no to free drinks." Quinn slurs before suddenly tripping over her feet, causing both of them to fumble.

Levi swears under his breath as he attempts to lift her back up. "Well, you need to practice being rude, because this is absolutely ridiculous."

"I'm sorryyy."

She sounds even more pathetic than before.

"Don't be sorry. Just walk."

Quinn manages to walk a few more steps, seeming to regain her balance, before her feet tangle together once again.

"Oh, for fucks sake." Levi groans, deciding to take matters into his own hands – literally. In one swift motion, Levi snatches Quinn up and tosses her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, securing arm around her knees while the rest of her drapes down his back.

"Hey!" Quinn exclaims, attempting to use what little strength she has to squirm out of his hold. "You can't do this to me! I'm a lady!"

"Well, you haven't been acting very ladylike tonight." Levi replies in a deadpan tone as he starts to walk, ignoring Quinn's protests.

"You could make me sick, you know!"

"If you vomit on me, I swear to God I'll make you sleep in it."

The woman on his shoulder lets out a defeated groan. " Well, how the hell do you expect to find my room if I can't give you directions?"

"If you were in an unfamiliar place like this, you'd memorize where everything is too."

"That's creepy."

"It's smart. Don't go thinking you're special, miss priss."

Quinn gasps and slams her fist as hard as she can manage against Levi's back, which isn't very hard given the state she's in. "What'd you just call me?"

"You heard me. Now shut up and let me get you to your damn room."

"Some gentleman you are." she huffs.

"If you wanted a gentleman, you should've picked someone else."

"Maybe I should've."

Just as Quinn finishes her sentence, Levi arrives at the door to her room and plops her back down on her feet. "So why didn't you?"

Quinn has to take a moment to reorient herself, balancing against the wooden frame of her door. "Huh?"

"Why the hell did you pick me over Sairam?"

His question causes the girl to shrink back a bit, rubbing the side of her arm and averting her gaze from his. "I dunno. It's not like I think Sairam would hurt me or anything, but… I know where his interests lie. And I know that's not the case with you."

"It's stupid to assume something like that about a man you don't know."

"Yeah, yeah, I already know you think I'm stupid." Quinn sighs as she leans her full weight against the door. "I don't know, I guess you just feel… safe."

"Safe?"

That isn't exactly a word Levi has ever heard someone use to describe him, but Quinn doubles down. "Safe."

"A lot of people would disagree with you."

"Yeah, well, they're stupid too."

Levi only scoffs in response.

"Can I ask you something?" Quinn asks in a meek tone, her eyes still glazed over as she looks his way.

"Sure."

"Do you hate me?"

Great. More drunken dramatics.

"I don't hate you. I don't particularly like you, but that lumps you in with most people."

She looks relieved at his half-hearted answer. "I can live with that."

"Go to bed." Levi orders her as he straightens up to leave, before pausing for a moment and plucking a stray flower from Quinn's hair that's nearly dangling in her face. "And take this shit out of your hair."

A smile spreads across the girl's face as she cracks open her door. "Thank you by the way, Levi. I appreciate it."

Levi rolls his eyes. "I told you before. Don't thank me."

Quinn disappears behind the door as he starts walking down the hallway, shoving his hands into his pockets and pondering the mess of a day he's just had. That woman became stranger and stranger to him every time they spoke, always keeping him on a fine line between concern and comfort. He does think she's stupid for choosing him so blindly, but she wasn't exactly wrong for it. He wouldn't dream of taking advantage of someone who's intoxicated — hell, he wouldn't dream about doing anything like that sober. Despite how dumb he thinks Quinn is for trusting him, a part of him is thankful that she did.

Better him than anyone else.

As Levi continues to walk, he glances down at his hand, where the flower he picked out of Quinn's hair is still pinched between his fingers. It's a vibrant blend of orange and yellow, its petals fluffing out into a perfect circle.

He flicks the flower to the ground and keeps walking.

*︎**

Furlan is waiting for Levi at the end of the hallway that leads to the men's barracks.

"Took care of Isabel, I assume?" Levi asks as he walks past his friend, yearning for what little comfort his bed has to offer.

"Yeah," Furlan replies, a hint of concern in his voice. "Levi, I think we need to talk."

His words stop Levi dead in his tracks. He responds to Furlan without turning around to face him. "About what?"

Furlan walks himself in front of Levi, rendering his avoidance useless. "The expedition. It's coming up fast. We need to decide what that means — and what our next moves are."

The group had a discussion about this a few days ago, carefully considering their options on how to proceed. They could attempt to finish the job before the expedition and avoid going outside the walls, or they could go along with the expedition to buy themselves more time, ensuring the job won't be sloppy. Hell, they could try to go after Erwin while on the expedition itself.

There's a fourth option that Furlan keeps bringing up, but Levi doesn't like to talk about it.

"I really do think staying is worth considering." Furlan starts, bringing up the last thing Levi wants to hear right now. "We don't know how this situation is going to play out. I mean, think about it, if we get caught, there's no way one noble's good word would grant us release – not that we would get it in the first place. That would be an admission of guilt on his part."

"But if we succeed, we'll have an easy life on the surface. And I don't get caught. I never get caught."

"But that was in the Underground where all we had to worry about were those half-ass MP patrol units. We're surrounded by soldiers 24/7 – soldiers who are trained to take down monsters. The chances of us getting away scot free are low. Too low. I know you don't like the idea, but staying with the Scouts might be our best option. Sure, we're putting ourselves in danger, but we have a roof over our heads and guaranteed meals we don't have to fight for. We'll never have to go back to the Underground again, or worry about doing a nobleman's dirty work."

Levi's jaw is wired tight with frustration. "I already told you, I don't intend on enlisting."

"I think a part of you wants to." Furlan's voice is unusually blunt, catching Levi off guard. "For a completely different reason."

Something heavy hits the pit of his stomach. "You better not be saying what I think you're saying."

"I am. You've been acting strange ever since we got here, and it gets worse when you're around her."

"Things around here are fucking strange." Levi argues, voice sharp and defensive. "She's fucking strange. If anything, she makes me want to get out of here even more."

That part was true.

"Then why the hell are you helping her all the time?"

"Because she keeps getting herself in fucking trouble."

"And why the hell do you care?"

"I don't—" Levi sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. "I don't know. Why the hell did we care when Isabel was in trouble?"

"Isabel's life was in danger. She had no place to go, and multiple people were trying to hunt her down. Quinn isn't in any kind of situa—"

"I'm done listening to this stupid shit." Levi cuts Furlan's words short, his tone harsh. "We'll do the job during the expedition, and we'll do it right. Scouts die all the time, and their precious commanders are no exception. We'll get the job done, and get the fuck out."

Furlan doesn't look at all convinced. "Levi, I-"

"I mean it. There isn't a damn thing you can do to change my mind. I'm not staying in this shithole any longer than I have to."

Furlan looks disheartened, but he doesn't argue any further. "Fine. If that's what you choose, I'll go along with you."

There's never been any other choice in Levi's eyes. He wasn't built to serve others, or to be a pawn in this asinine game that the Survey Corps was playing. He's sick and tired of fighting, and after they do what they came here to do, he'll be done with it.

He'll be done with fighting.