Chapter Ten - Questions, Answers

"WHAAT?! You're telling me Levi originally joined the Scouts to kill-"

Nanaba's hand slaps firmly onto Hange's mouth, the blonde looking back and forth at their surroundings to make sure nobody had heard their outburst. "Yes, okay?" she hisses under her breath. "That's what Miche told us, anyway. The blackmail, the assassination plan, the expedition – all of it.

Hange's eyes are still blown wide with shock. "Have you told Quinn about this?"

"No, not yet."

"Good. Don't."

Nanaba looks both surprised and confused. "Why not?"

Hange tuts and pushes their glasses up their nose. "I know she seems all nice and understanding, but Quinn has a sense of justice sent from hell. If she found out that one of her comrades deserted their squad out on the field, she'd make heads roll."

"That doesn't sound very easy to do when it's Levi's head in question."

Hange points out a finger at Nanaba in emphasis. "Exactly. Can you imagine if those two got into a fight? I don't think there's enough money in the regiment's entire budget to cover the damages that would cost."

"So what do we do?"

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing. You don't know anything, I don't know anything — nobody knows a damn thing."

Nanaba sighs and rubs a hand over her face. "That will only hold up for so long. It only took one month for Miche to let this slip, and I'm even worse at keeping secrets. That's why I came to you. You're sure it wouldn't be easier to just tell her?"

"I'm sure." Hange answers immediately. "More than sure."

"… I still feel like this is gonna turn out badly."

Hange is quiet for a moment before they answer. "Yeah. It probably will."

*︎**

Levi was starting to get used to the idea of having friends again.

Well, acquaintances.

People that he didn't hate.

The first couple of weeks after Isabel and Furlan died were pretty ugly for him. He would snap at nearly anyone who said a word to him, and even got himself in trouble for sucker punching a guy who had the audacity to toss his shirt onto Levi's bunk. Erwin had pulled him into his office and told him that if he really wanted this — if he really wanted to be a part of the Scout Regiment — he would need to establish some kind of comradery between himself and his fellow soldiers.

'When you're outside the walls, you need to be able to trust the people who are fighting alongside you. That's kind of hard to do when you're afraid that said person will hit you in the face over any trivial issue.'

Calling that blatant violation of personal space a "trivial issue" was a bit insulting, but to some extent, Erwin was right. Evidence has always shown that assisted Titan kills resulted in less casualties to ones attempted solo, and squad synergy plays a huge role in that.

Plus, the last time Levi went at something solo, it didn't do him any favors.

Sometimes he still isn't sure if he really does want to become a part of the Scout Regiment. Did he make this decision because he truly thought it was right? Or was it because he was so grief stricken that he had no idea what the hell else he was supposed to do with himself?

'Being a soldier means utilizing your strengths to accomplish what others can't.'

'I've always been a lot stronger than other people, and I want that strength to mean something. Something good.'

Yeah. If he was going to dedicate his life to anything, let it be this. Not fighting to survive in the filth of the Underground, or rotting away in some jail cell in Sina.

Something good.

He almost sounds just as cheesy as she does.

Speaking of her, Quinn hadn't been quite as mopey as she was before they took that trip into Trost. She looked like the weight on her shoulders was a bit lighter, and walked with a slight skip in her step that had been missing ever since she had returned. The scorching summer sun also seemed to have a great influence on her mood. While everyone else was sluggish and overwhelmed from the heat, Quinn was thriving in it. She ran through her training drills like it was nothing, her skin never even showing the slightest sign of perspiration. It was actually kind of impressive.

Levi wasn't one to get very exhausted during training either, but even he wasn't immune to the heat like she was. It never got this bad in the Underground — people down there were lucky if they got to see the sun at all. The high temperatures had him pacing around the training yard with his canteen in hand, taking periodic gulps of water as he tries to recover from the laps he had just finished. There's a faint sound of laughter behind him, and it's fast approaching.

"I win!" Quinn yells triumphantly as she sprints past him, no sign of slowing down as she continues around the Scouts' pitiful excuse for a track.

"Wh- When the hell did this become a competition?!" Levi yells after her.

He has no idea how he didn't even notice Quinn trailing him.

"Oh by all means, we can keep going! You can take a little break, I'll still be here when you get back!"

Cocky little brat.

When Quinn completes another lap, she comes to a stop next to him. Her breathing is slightly labored, and there's the tiniest bit of moisture spread across her forehead. "Made you break a sweat, though." Levi points out as Quinn retrieves her own canteen of water. She shoots him an amused glare, but that look is quickly replaced with one of concern.

"Oh, shit." Quinn says as she walks closer to him, and Levi notices she's examining his face.

"What?" Levi asks in confusion, lifting his hand to his face and pressing two of his fingers against his cheek. "Ow, shit-"

"Mhm. Sun got you good."

For some dumb reason, Levi decides to press his fingers to his face again, a sharp burning pain radiating across his skin. "What the hell?"

"It's a sunburn, and a pretty bad one at that." Quinn answers him, wincing as though the sight of his face is putting her through pain. "It happens when you're out in the sun for too long."

Now that it's pointed out to him, Levi's skin does feel a bit tight, every movement of his face bringing a slight discomfort that's quickly growing. "Well what the hell do I do about it?"

Quinn points over to a tree a few yards away. "For starters, get out of the sun. Go sit over there, I have something that'll help."

Levi doesn't even get the chance to reply before Quinn takes off walking towards the main building. He sighs and decides to do what she says, sitting himself down in the shade of the tree.

"Bossy." he mumbles.

He hears a faint "I heard that!" before Quinn disappears through the doors. It doesn't take more than a few minutes before she shows back up, two small jars in hand. She extends one of them out to Levi.

"What is it?" he asks as he opens the container, his face scrunching up in disgust the moment he sees the texture of what's inside. It looks almost like clear snot, and there's a string of it that's sticking to the lid of the jar.

"It's aloe. It's from a plant, it'll help the sunburn heal."

"There's no chance in hell I'm putting this shit on my face."

Quinn rolls her eyes. "You'll regret it if you don't. The pain will only get worse the more it sets in."

Levi bites his tongue, and he can't even believe he's considering it, but damn it, his face hurts. He very reluctantly dips one of his fingers into the substance, and it nearly makes him gag.

"Do it or I'm gonna do it by force."

"I'm pissing myself already." Levi scoffs as he finally smears the mystery gel on his face, and it actually feels… great. It leaves an odd cooling sensation that lessens the pain on his skin almost instantly.

When he looks back up at Quinn, she's smirking. "I told you so." she says as she shoves the other jar towards him. "And that will help make sure it doesn't happen again."

Levi looks at the second container skeptically. "What is this one supposed to be?"

"A lotion for your face. Put it on before you go out in the sun."

He's still not a fan of the idea of putting more strange substances on his face, but he accepts it anyway. He assumes it's another one of those weird products her mother made and/or traded for, which is just enough of a reason to trust it.

He looks back up to Quinn. "Thank y-"

She's got an even bigger smirk on her face.

He doesn't finish his sentence.

Quinn is in the middle of walking back inside of HQ when she runs into Nanaba, who's looking at her with just the slightest amount of concern. "Oh, hey."

"Hey." The other woman responds in a quiet tone, watching from the corner of her eye as Levi walks past the two. She waits until she's sure he's out of earshot to continue. "What uh, what were you guys doing out there?"

"Oh." Quinn blinks a couple of times at the unusual question. "Well, Levi got a little sunburnt, so I gave him a couple of things to help. I imagine his skin isn't very used to the sun yet."

Nanaba hums to herself in response, and a sour look spreads across the blonde's face. It only weirds Quinn out even more. "What is it?"

"Huh? Oh- it's nothing."

"It really doesn't sound like nothing."

"No, really!" Nanaba insists. "It's nothing. I promise."

Quinn doesn't believe her for a second, but she doesn't think pushing more will get her much further than that.

For now.

Over the course of the next few days, Quinn began to notice that Nanaba was distancing herself from her. She had confronted her about it two other times, but the woman's will power was just strong enough for her to keep her mouth shut. But still, Quinn knew there was something wrong.

Next, she went to Gelgar, who was just as insistent that he didn't know what she was talking about. His argument sounded convincing enough, but he still wouldn't look her in the eye.

Quinn doubted that going to Commander Miche would be much help. He didn't seem like the type to indulge in gossip. So, fresh out of options, Quinn goes to the only person she has left.

Hange.

But there was a problem — Hange was a tough nut to crack when it came to secrets. If you had a secret that you just had to tell someone, it should be them. Despite their loud-mouthed nature, when it came to secrecy, their mouth was locked up tight.

But Quinn wasn't above trying.

She had managed to track her friend down just minutes before lights-out, pacing after them down a dimly lit hallway. "Hange, please. I know something is up with Nanaba, and I've seen you two talking before. You gotta give me something to work with."

"Nope nope nope nope nope!" Hange refuses over and over again. "You're being paranoid. You're crazy. You've lost your mind."

Quinn's hands ball up in frustration. "You don't sound very convincing, you know?"

Hange decides to resort to a new tactic, and starts to bolt it down the hallway while waving their hand back at Quinn. "This was a nice talk, but I've got a lot of work to catch up on, so I'll catch ya later okayyy?! Byeee!"

"For fuck's sake." Quinn gripes to herself, watching as Hange nearly trips over their own two feet trying to make their escape. She doesn't chase after them — there's no point. Her chances of getting Hange to talk were slim from the get-go.

But damn it, what else is she supposed to do?

Deciding that she's done enough worrying for the night, Quinn makes her way down to the mess hall, keeping a vigilant eye out for anyone who might be on night watch. Very few people actually dared to sneak out after curfew, knowing Commander Shadis would rip them a new asshole if they were caught. The Scouts apparently had a surprising amount of espionage committed against them.

So, the only people who snuck out after dark were the skillful and the stupid.

Quinn doesn't make a sound as she slinks into the kitchen, managing to navigate herself through the dim light well enough to find one of the several old wood-burning stoves. She prepares a small pot of water and sets it up to boil, leaning back against one of the counters and sighing in frustration.

"What's got you all in a twist?"

There's an embarrassing yelp of surprise from Quinn, startled so harshly she nearly loses her balance. When she looks over at Levi, he isn't quite smirking, but the corners of his lips are turned up ever so slightly. It's the closest thing she's seen to a smile ever appear on his face.

And it's because he's fucking laughing at her.

"What the hell?!" Quinn yells at him as she tries to collect herself, and damn it she tries so hard to hide the embarrassment in her voice. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing. Isn't it against the rules to be out past your bedtime?"

Quinn feels her eye twitch in frustration. "I don't have the patience for this right now."

"I'll shut my mouth if you answer me."

There's a groan that comes from her as she throws her head back dramatically. "Fine. It's stupid. I just think Nanaba is avoiding me and nobody will tell me why."

Levi is quiet for a moment. "Hmm, you're right. That is stupid."

"Thanks, Levi. I never would've guessed you'd be the type to offer such nice advice. So, can I ask why you're down here?"

Levi cocks his head towards the stove. "You beat me to it."

"Ah," Quinn glances back towards the pot. "Well, do you want a cup?"

"Let me make it."

Quinn almost looks offended. "So first you sneak up on me, then you try to ambush my tea?"

"If you're scared that mine will show yours up, you can just say that."

Levi's voice is laden with sarcasm, and it's slowly getting under her skin. She holds her hands up and surrenders. "Fine. Seems it's only fair since I made the last one."

Levi rolls his eyes as he begins to work, even going so far as to change out the water that Quinn was boiling. He preemptively defends himself once he sees the insulted look on her face. "I have my methods."

She isn't sure what "method" could possibly be ruined by her water, but she doesn't argue. The two stand across from each other in silence as the water boils — not an awkward one, just a comfortable sense of quiet.

One thing Quinn likes about Levi is how she never feels obligated to talk when she doesn't want to. He's more than comfortable with just existing in the same space. In fact, he probably prefers it that way.

It takes him a few minutes, but Levi finally presents Quinn with a proper looking cup of tea. It does smell really nice — she can tell just from where it sits comfortably in her hands. Levi watches her, eyebrow slightly raised, waiting for her to take a sip.

She does, and fuck, it's good. Ridiculously good. It's so good that she doesn't even want to admit it, because she knows it would only inflate Levi's tea-making ego even more. When she looks back up at him, his face is virtually unchanged, but there's a smirk in his eyes.

"… That's not fair. I only had a campfire and some tin cans to work with."

Levi almost smiles again.

*︎**

She had tea with him two more times that week.

It was nice having someone around who was actually pleasant company to have tea with. Hange was far too loud for anything to be remotely peaceful, and Nanaba and Gelgar preferred a hard ale over a cup of tea any day. But with Levi, things were easy. Simple. In the brief periods where they would talk, Quinn could get carried away with her rambling, but Levi always listened. Maybe he didn't mind her pointless conversations just as much as she didn't mind his silence.

They had about a week now before the next expedition, and Miche was keeping his squad especially busy. They'd had several meetings alongside Erwin's squad about their new positioning in the formation — the front of the right side, right behind Erwin. Those hours in that boardroom felt like years, and it left Quinn feeling completely burnt out. She could run laps all day and night, but mission briefings? Pure torture.

She's doing her best to drag herself down to the mess hall for dinner, when Quinn hears a voice from behind her call out her name. When she turns around, she's surprised to see that it's Nanaba. "Quinn! Whatcha' doing tonight?"

She isn't sure why Nanaba bothered to ask, given the fact that she never really does anything special after the work day ends – when she thinks about Levi.

It's not like meeting up for tea was a scheduled thing or anything, it was just a total coincidence that the two of them showed up around the same time three times that week.

Okay, well, technically it might not have been, but that still doesn't make it a pre existing commitment.

"Nothing special, why?"

"Miche, Gelgar and I are having drinks in one of the lounges upstairs. You should come join, it'll be fun."

Quinn has to take a moment to think about it. She hadn't drank alcohol since the festival last spring, and an unwinding buzz does sound nice to her right now. Plus, Nanaba is actually talking to her like a normal human being again.

So, if Levi did show up tonight, he would just have to drink his tea alone.

"Alright, yeah, that sounds fun. I'll be there."

*︎**

Miche's office was surprisingly nice.

It was a large room with space for both a sitting area and a desk. There was a coffee table sat between two sofas, with various bottles of liquor and crystal glasses set out. Nanaba and Quinn sat on one side, with Miche and Gelgar on the other. While a lot of people would find drinking with their subordinates wildly inappropriate (and also technically forbidden), Quinn had learned that Miche was a very relaxed superior compared to others. He was definitely a leader through comradery, not the iron-fist type at all.

The group had been talking and joking as the night went on, and Quinn was sipping on her second glass of gin for the night, when a question pops into her head out of nowhere.

"So, why did you guys not invite Levi tonight?"

All three of them go dead silent. Gelgar and Nanaba exchange worried looks with each other.

"I mean, he's a part of the squad too. Sure, he'd probably say no, but it feels kinda bad not inviting him anyways."

Another moment of silence passes before a long, drawn out sigh comes from Miche, setting his glass down on the table. "Alright, if everybody else knows, then you should too."

Nanaba is shaking her head frantically, which Miche doesn't seem to notice at all. "You see, during the abnormal attack on the last expedition-"

"Ahaha! Maybe this isn't the right time to talk about this!" Nanaba interrupts, voice cracking as she tries and fails to sound casual.

Quinn looks over at her with a confused look before a moment of realization hits her. "Is this about why you've been acting so damn weird?"

Nanaba doesn't answer. Quinn turns back to Miche. "Keep going."

He puts it a lot more bluntly this time. "Levi wasn't with your squad during the abnormal attack because he had secretly been hired to kill Commander Erwin. That's why he came to the Scouts in the first place."

It takes Quinn a minute to even process what he just said. "Wh- Huh? Kill Commander Erwin?"

"Yes."

At first, she's sure that Miche has to be joking. Kill Erwin? Why the hell would Levi do that?

"Why the hell would he do that?"

Miche straightens up a bit and picks up his drink, shooting back the rest of it in one smooth motion. "They were hired by a councilman that Erwin had on a tight leash. He promised them a comfortable life on the surface if they could kill Erwin and steal back the documents he was using to blackmail him."

"They?" Quinn swallows a lump in her throat. "The other two were in on it?"

"Isabel and Furlan? Yes, they were."

It's a lot of information to take in all at once — infuriating information, at that. The liquor lingering in Quinn's system only intensifies the heat quickly building in her chest, with a tight knot of betrayal to accompany it. "But then why the hell would they wait until the expedition? Why not do it sooner and not have to risk going beyond the walls?"

"I don't know. To be honest with you, we thought they'd act sooner, too. You'd have to ask him."

Him. Quinn's fists tighten at her side. She immediately looks over to the clock, and oh boy, look what time it is.

Quinn stands up so fast it almost scoots the sofa back, pacing quickly towards the door and out into the hall. She doesn't bother to be quiet — she'll be damned if anyone is going to stop her from confronting him.

When she opens the kitchen door, Levi is standing in his usual spot against one of the counters. He immediately notices that Quinn is upset, straightening up his posture

"Did you abandon your squad out on the field to go try and kill Commander Erwin?"

Levi is silent for a moment, then he answers. "Yes."

At first, Quinn feels like she can't move a muscle, his confession bringing a sense of betrayal that seeps under her skin. But, next thing she knows, her arm is moving by itself, her fist making contact with Levi's nose.

It's not that he couldn't have dodged it, he just let her. He let her hit him.

Levi braces himself against the counter and looks back at her with a cold expression, his chest heaving slightly as a trail of blood trickles down to his upper lip. His lack of emotion only makes Quinn's anger worse.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?! Why the hell would you take them outside of the walls if you didn't have to?! You had an entire month to do what you came here to do! Why the fuck-"

Her voice gets caught in her throat, just for a split second. The liquor was starting to go to her head. "Why the fuck would you wait until the exact moment we needed you the most to disappear?"

Levi doesn't answer. He continues to stare at her with a face of indifference.

"Fucking answer me!"

Quinn rushes forward and grabs at the collar of Levi's shirt, which seems to snap him out of whatever thought process he was in. He pries her arms away and grabs onto her shirt in return, the fabric knotted tightly in his hands as he slams Quinn against a nearby wall. The back of her head hits the stone surface so hard it dazes her.

"I don't know what the hell it is with you and your damn liquor, but you need to stop acting like you know anything about my goddamn situation!" Levi snaps in Quinn's face, nearly lifting her off of the ground. "I did what I fucking had to. It's war! People die! Why are you the only fucking one in this shithole who can't get that through your thick fucking skull?!"

There's a ringing in her ears that's slowly fading out. When Quinn opens her eyes again, she sees a raging storm of gray reflecting all of her anger straight back at her.

"Put me down."

Levi hesitates for a moment, then lowers Quinn to the floor and steps back. She has to take a moment to compose herself, but doesn't give him the privilege of looking him in the eye again. She can't think of what to say — she has nothing to say to him. All she wants is to be as far away from him as physically possible.

When she straightens herself out again, she notices Levi watching her with an… apologetic look?

Quinn shoves herself past him and leaves without another word.