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CHAPTER 12
2-20-2186
[ EAGLE NEBULA | IMIR SYSTEM | KORLUS ]
OPERATIONAL MANDATE: RECRUITMENT DR. OKEER
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It was amazing what a great neat mess it was down here under all the catwalks in engineering. Tali had spent the better half of two hours now working through the pipes, manifolds, and circuitry that gave life to their fast little ship.
Not so little anymore, Tali reminded herself, remembering that this wasn't the old Normandy.
Just to get through some of the nooks and crannies, she had to take off her boots and belts just to slip through. But she had to give it to Cerberus. They built the ship and built it well. Everything was exactly where she thought it should've been. It was organic in a way, with some admission. Pretty awesome that she didn't have to think too much about where everything was.
"Hey." Garrus' disembodied voice said from somewhere behind her.
Tali looked up and saw only a small part of him through the winding tubes and bounded wires.
"How'd you know I was here?"
"Well, you left your boots here on the ground. Didn't think you'd be much farther than them."
"Ah."
"Now what're you doing exactly?"
"Just running a thorough check of everything."
"Don't trust the computers to tell you what's right and not?"
"I do. But it certainly helps to know where things are before they go wrong to save time and lives."
"That's what manuals and EDI are for, Tali."
Tali wound her way back and poked her head through to give him a look. "Alright asshole. What do you want?"
Garrus just laughed softly and sat down on a small chair. "Just looking for small talk to cover lost time. It has been a while since we've really talked."
She disappeared back into the ships guts and returned to work. "It has hasn't it? You doing whatever it was you were doing and me staying home."
She ran her fingers along a pipe and found the lettering she was looking for. "Speaking of that… what exactly were you doing for those past two years?"
"Cleaning up Omega. Ever heard of archangel?"
"Yeah, on reddit maybe, on one of omega's forums."
"Yeah." He nodded, "That was me."
"Can't imagine," Tali said, actually surprised but not at the same time, "You keep a count of how many bad guys you tagged?"
"Stopped keeping track after a while." Garrus shrugged as he took a sip of whatever it was he brought down with him, "You start to feel more like a mass murderer if you do."
"If you think like that, then we're all mass murderers." Tali mumbled, "We all had a minimum of 50 confirmed kills back on the old Normandy... not including geth or collectors."
"Yeah," Garrus murmured, nodding sullenly as he resigned himself to change the subject, "I'm surprised that you're not down there with John. Thought you'd be a little upset honestly."
"Not really."
He raised a brow. "Do you even know who he's with?"
"Zaeed. Mordin. Like, four Cerberus marines, and a volunteer from Olasie's squad I think. Either Darehk or Talukh."
"So you know he's in good hands." Garrus nodded, "So tell me about your friend Olasie and her squad."
"What do you want to know?"
"Their names and their unit."
Tali quirked her brow. "Giving you their names is going to be a mouthful."
"That's fine."
"Well, you have Sergeant Olasie'Venn. She's the squad leader obviously." Tali started, not really paying attention anymore as she kept studying some of the blinking lights on a circuit panel, "They were part of Admiral Gerrel's special tasks unit. The Neema's detachment of expeditionaries essentially. She was the smallest squad of four."
"Yeah?"
"Yup. Then you got Corporals Kylie'Pass and Teri'Migh and specialists Talukh'Daer and Darehk'Talon. All of us end in vas Neema."
"That wasn't too bad." Garrus said earnestly.
"I guess. Why'd you wanna know?"
"Thought I'd ask you first before I try integrating them with my team. Anything I should know in advance?"
"Nope. They're your pretty basic soldier. With the exception of Talukh. Trained infiltrator."
"You mean that 'invisible' sniping."
"What's so bad about that?"
"I just heard those cloaks give you headaches or something."
"What?"
"I don't know," Garrus shrugged, "Guess it was just a rumor I heard."
Tali pushed her way back to where Garrus and her boots were at, folded her arms along a pipe, and faced the turian.
"Alright. Enough of the small talk. What're you down here for?"
Garrus took a steady breath and stared at his feet before sighing. "Am I that transparent?"
"Yes."
"Alright," Garrus said, raising his hands slightly in surrender, "I just… wanted to know if you're at a hundred percent. Ever since you—well… disappeared and left that night two years ago. You know. After John's funeral."
It was Tali's turn to sigh. She hadn't thought much of her last night on the Citadel before leaving without any goodbyes to the team.
"John's back. I'm fine." Tali said quietly, staring rather seriously at Garrus, "Don't worry about me."
"Look." Garrus said slowly while thinking really hard, "You're my friend Tali. Hell, one of the only few real friends I've ever had. Which means I want what's best for you. I've thought a lot about this and I want to remind you of the reality of the work we all do."
Tali felt her stomach churn a little. "What do you mean?"
Garrus stood up and paced slowly back and forth while his eyes wandered the ceiling.
"Remember how I told you Jack killed two of my guys?"
"Yes." She said timidly.
"In seconds, they were gone. Dead instantly. Impaled with a dozen rebars." The turian closed his eyes for a solid moment and continued. "They were good people and I wish you could've met them." He whispered with a slight crack in his voice, "And these past few days I thought long and hard about how that could've been any one of us in their place."
He finally faced her with a serious frown and dead on stare. "It could be me next time. It could be you. And even John."
There was dead silence between them and Tali felt the room begin to spin.
"…John can't be your crutch." Garrus murmured, "No one can. Not me. Not your friends. No one."
Every word Garrus said hit her like a sharp knife. So she stood rigid and felt her legs go numb while a tear started to grace her cheek.
"I'm not in some fantasy," Tali said, visibly shaken, "I know how this goes for all of us. I was there right by you back on Ullipses. Back when the collectors took everyone and John. And everything before that."
"I would never say any of this to hurt you." Garrus said, still standing stiffly, "I say this to prepare you for something I hope will never happen."
"Garrus?"
"Yes, Tali."
"Please leave me alone."
Garrus looked down, completely defeated with himself, and nodded once. "Okay."
He left without saying another word and without looking back.
She kept her gaze on him until he was out of sight and slithered back into her dark corner.
With a choked up look, she hugged her knees and covered her head and took several deep breaths.
"That was totally uncalled for Garrus," she breathed to herself, "What the hell, dude. Ask me if I'm a hundred percent before totally wiping me out? As if I didn't have enough on my plate?"
With her eyes still closed, she sat for several more minutes doing nothing.
Her omni-tool chimed.
"Hello?" She answered slowly, doing her best to hide her sad voice.
"Hey Tals," John greeted with a tired but fairly happy and relieved tone, "Just calling to tell you we're all alright. I'm gonna need you and Mordin to take a look at what we're bringing up to the Normandy later today."
"What is it?" Tali asked, still hugging her knees and watching the screen on her omni-tool.
"Take a look," John said before showing her the giant glass tank with a krogan inside of it.
"Uhm… what exactly do you need me to do?" Tali panned, "I'm not really competent with krogan in test tubes."
"Okeer was a no go, fortunately." John explained, "Kind of relieved to be honest. After talking to him, I didn't really want him on the team."
"I see he's not around. What happened?"
"Died protecting his science project. We're bringing his kid with us though."
"What?"
"Well, his kid is the test tube."
"...That's probably a shaky 2 on a 1 to 10 scale for being a good idea." Tali said with total honesty.
"Yeah, I thought the same. But don't worry. We're going to work on it tonight."
All Tali could do was shrug at that point. "Alright, John."
"Hey… you okay?" John said a little quietly, "You don't… sound right."
"No, I'm fine. Just been busy all day."
"Sure it isn't because you're not down here with us?"
"I'm fine. Really." Tali smiled to try and make her words sound and feel a little truer.
"If you say so," John acquiesced, "I'll see you in about two hours. Stay pretty."
Tali smiled a little and nodded to him before ending the call.
John cautiously sipped on his tea while he watched Tali and Mordin work on the giant vat Okeer had so obsessively worked on.
"What do you think, Mordin?" John asked he leaned on a wall, "Anything of particular interest?"
Mordin nodded as he typed a couple things on his tablet, "Krogan scientist unheard of. Usually never heard in same sentence." Mordin observed with a small smile, "Not because unintelligent, but because of violent culture and societal tendency. Study of agriculture, art, construction frowned upon; unless with guns."
"Naturally." Tali murmured.
"Yes," Mordin breathed, nodding once, "But not natural at same time. Krogan large. Strong. Capable and valued as soldier. Gamble of their fate as opposed to entire galactic community was considered. Eventually deemed acceptable to cull rachni in rachni war."
"And that's when it backfired." Tali added, still looking at a keypad.
"Yes." Mordin agreed, "Worst came to fear: Adoption of krogan cause unintended acceleration of their culture: Weren't ready. Catastrophe followed."
"You sound like you've studied your fair share of history, professor." Shepard said.
"Must know. Part of job; all related in some way to genophage." Mordin reminded, "Context vital for long-standing goal."
Tali pressed some buttons and there was a decompressive hiss.
"…Uhm…"
Mordin whirled around as Shepard set down his cup of tea.
"Everything alright?"
"I… I'm not sure…" Tali said, backing away slowly. By now, blue liquid began oozing from the sides of the vat.
"It's opening." John murmured dumbly, "What are we expecting?"
"Don't know." Mordin shrugged, "Be ready. Handgun in locker. Please get it." Mordin breathed before turning to the quarian, "Tali. Please retrieve shotgun."
All she did was nod and rush to the table to get it."
"EDI, send someone down here to help us out just in case things go south."
"Right away." EDI replied, "Notifying Mrs. Lawson now."
Shepard holstered the pistol on his hip and folded his arms before standing between Mordin and Tali. By now, the blue stuff had finally dribbled the rest of its contents out before finally opening.
The krogan fell to his knees and hurled two stomachs full of vat fluid.
"Can you hear me?" John asked simply when the krogan finished retching. Mordin kept looking at his omni-tool while Tali stood there with her shotgun ready.
The krogan took a ragged breath and settled his eyes on John.
"Human. Male." The giant beast said.
He looked to Mordin next. "Salarian. Male."
Lastly, he looked to Tali. "Quarian. Female."
John gave Tali a sideways glance. "Uh, yes. That's what we are. Do you have a name?"
"No." The krogan growled, inhaled deeply, and charged.
Quick on the trigger, Tali fired her shotgun, the stock kicking sharply into her shoulder. He took the blow center mass, but the armor held. Within a second, he'd cleared the distance between the three.
He knocked Tali's shotgun out of her hands and threw her across the room before grabbing Mordin's arm, twisting, and giving the poor old man a swift kick to the rear. Before Shepard tried to bring his sidearm to bear, the giant tank bred alien grabbed a hold of him before slamming him up against the wall right next to where Tali was trying to regain her wits. He put a boot on her to keep her from moving.
"Stand down." John said as calmly as possible, "I won't ask again."
Seeing as how the krogan hadn't noticed, John put the muzzle of his gun between the seal of his chest plate.
The krogan's piercing blue gaze studied the human for a moment before he spoke. "Before you die, I need a name."
John didn't have much patience for anyone that wasn't willing to listen to reason. Especially so for enraged krogan.
"Commander John Shepard. Captain of the Normandy SR2." John snarled before pulling the trigger.
The round passed through the korgan's clothes and disappeared into his gut. Taking advantage of the surprised look on the krogan's face, John focused all his cybernetic might into pushing the large dinosaur away. Keeping the leverage up, John slung seven slugs into the beast before letting off the trigger and aiming for one of his two eyeballs.
The krogan began bleeding in several places, but looked largely fine.
"You're just shy of dying pal. Move a finger and you'll be breathing through a new hole in your head."
Satisfied for the moment that this raging idiot wasn't going to move, he helped Tali up and kept the handgun trained on the krogan. "You alright Tali?"
"Nothing a couple of pain meds won't solve." She groaned, "Keelah, I knew this was a bad idea."
"Not your name." The krogan said, still ignoring the volley of bullets he'd received, "Mine. I am trained, I know things, but the tank… Okeer couldn't implant connection. His words are hollow."
The krogan kept staring resolutely forward and started reciting random gibberish. "Warlord. Legacy. Grunt. —…Grunt. It was among the last. It has no meaning. It'll do."
John gave the krogan an unimpressed look before glancing at the doctor to see if he was okay. "Doctor, you alright?" John asked as Mordin stood up.
"Am fine. Though am fascinated." The salarian answered with what John couldn't believe was curiosity.
"I am Grunt. If you are worthy of your command, prove your strength and try to destroy me."
"And I just said that if you move a goddamn finger, you'll be breathing through a new hole in your head."
"Why make attempt to kill you?" Mordin decided to ask.
"To do what I am meant to." Grunt replied, only glancing at the salarian, "To fight and reveal the strongest. I feel nothing for Okeer's clan or his enemies. That imprint failed. He has failed."
Mordin folded his arms and kept studying Grunt. "Fascinating," he said again.
Grunt continued. "Without a reason that's mine, one fight is as good as any other. Might as well start with all of you."
John was beginning to lose his patience. "Stop it. Now. I took you in with the intention to have you join us and fight an enemy that threatens the galaxy. You fight us now? You won't live past five minutes to do anything."
Miranda, Jacob, Zaeed, and two Cerberus soldiers stepped into the room with Garrus and his team just right behind.
"You're fighting the reapers." Grunt said in a way that wasn't a question.
"Okeer imprint that to you?"
"Yes," Grunt said with a mindful eye on the biotics flowing from both Jacob and Miranda at the door, "It was one of the last things he gave me."
"Did Okeer ever tell you anything about us?"
"No." Grunt answered.
John motioned to Tali and Garrus with a simple nod. "You're talking to a group who killed one."
The krogan contemplated his options and sounded pleased. "That's acceptable… A worthy foe… and a reason for me to fight for you."
John gave him a long and cautious stare. "Are we good then?"
"Yes."
"Are you sure?"
Grunt stood in a more relaxed position and nodded once. "Yes."
"Good." John sighed with relief as he holstered his gun, "Here. You might want to take that off."
John handed Grunt a disarmed detonator and pointed to the shaped charge wedged just under his breast plate.
Grunt laughed as he removed the explosive device. "Ha! You offered one hand and armed the other. You're worthy of your command."
Not a minute passed by and everyone had cleared out with Mordin and Miranda staying behind to watch over Grunt.
Tali, John, and Garrus stopped by the elevator. They let everyone else go back up first and waited for the lift to come back down to get them.
"You're lucky we brought those shaped charges down there for you." Garrus started slowly, "But detonating that, regardless of what is was designed for, was incredibly dangerous. Stupid even."
"It was about the only thing that was going to stop him."
"Yeah, and it could've stopped everyone dead in the room too."
"It was a half-assed risk, yes. But Grunt looked more dangerous. Just glad we hadn't used them to open up his tank."
"And we were just about to too." Tali murmured, still dazed by the whole ordeal, "I think I'm relieved it didn't come to that."
John just shook his head and stared upsettingly at Tali. "We should've been more prepared. I put you in massive jeopardy. Garrus was right; there wasn't anything stopping him from just killing all of us."
Tali felt her breath leave her when John said that. The words Garrus had told her earlier rung in her head ominously.
Tali pressed the button on the elevator with a little more force than necessary. "Let's not think about that, because it didn't happen."
"You have to admit it was a close call."
"It was, and I don't want to think about it, okay?"
"…okay." John said quietly.
Sensing that Tali was thinking about what he said to her earlier in the day, Garrus decided it was a good time to leave. He'd hang around and help Miranda and Mordin instead.
John kept staring at her until Garrus disappeared from the hallway.
"Tali?"
She looked him in the eye. "What?"
"Why don't you go up to our room? I'll be there in thirty minutes, okay? I just have stuff to situate first."
The elevator pinged and they both stepped inside.
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Tali splashed water on her face and stared at herself in the mirror with an empty expression.
She couldn't stop thinking about what John said. About what Garrus said. It was bugging the hell out of her and she couldn't for the life of her figure out why. She knew how this worked. She knew the risks of their work.
And yet… she didn't.
She was used to loss. Wasn't she?
She took a deep breath, reached for a clean towel, and pat herself dry. Maybe she wasn't used to loss. Maybe she wanted to give it all up and just live in a normal fantasy. To live in some condo with John and all her friends living their peaceful lives. To be able to complain about stupid things and to stop taking bets for who was going to lose their leg or, god-fucking-forbid, their life.
Tali held her breath till it hurt and let it out. It was morbid to talk so lightly of dying. It was bizarre. And she partook in it too. She shook her head. Maybe it was a good way to remind you of everyone's' mortality.
She heard John walk in humming to himself while he skimmed over some ship specs.
"Hun? You in here?" He asked between a sip of his tea.
"Yes." She answered sullenly.
He put down his tablet and mug immediately and walked to the bathroom.
For some reason, she put her mask back on before he could see her.
"You okay?"
"Yeah."
He gave her a very unconvinced look and crossed his arms. "If you think for a second the glass hides anything about you, you're going to have to try harder."
"Nothing's wrong." She murmured.
He took a deep breath and looked slightly down momentarily. "This is the second time I've asked if you were doing okay today. You're lying."
"I'm not."
"Yes. Yes you are."
"I can't… stop thinking, alright?" She mumbled with a slight choke up, "I think about us dying and I can't stand it."
His arms fell by his side and he stared straight into her with a serious frown.
"Nothing's going to happen to us, Tals."
"You don't know that."
She was right, he knew. There was no way he could know that. As that may be, John wasn't going to tell her otherwise.
"John." She shrugged as she looked up at the ceiling to keep the tears from falling, "All it takes is for some stray bullet or cooked grenade to end it for any one of us."
John's voice dropped to a sad whisper. "What's this about Tali?"
She couldn't look him in the face anymore. "Nothing." She whimpered, crossing an arm around her chest while a fist pressed against where her lips were, "It's nothing."
"Something made you think about this. What was it? Was it me going down there without you?"
"No."
"Then what?"
She sniffled. "…Ugh— it was Garrus, okay? He came to talk to me. About…—about how I can't have anyone be a crutch because any one of us could just die."
Shepard put his hands on his hips, bit his lip, and nodded grimly. "…He gave me that talk too."
"He did?"
"Yeah. Told me the same thing. Didn't think he would tell you."
"Well, surprise! Because he did."
"It's because he lost two of his own. I don't know if you know, but Garrus isn't the same man we've known two years ago."
Tali grit her teeth to starve herself the urge to let a tear fall. "I noticed."
"Omega changed him. And I'm not really sure if it was for the better."
"I knew he did it because he cares, but it was uncalled for."
"I think it's because he wasn't prepared to lose his friends the way he did." John explained slowly, "And the only way he knows how to handle it is to warn the people he cares about most to save him from what he's feeling now."
"That makes a lot of sense. He did mention them."
"He did for me too. But don't let what happened to him control you, Tali. Don't let it ever control you again."
She wrapped her arms around John and embraced him sluggishly. "I won't," She whispered, "I promise."
It wasn't long before they changed and went to bed.