Okay, so the other two were crack treated seriously, this one is just crack. But it still is canon to Crystallization. I hope you enjoy.

This oneshot takes place in late September, the recording itself during the week where Makoto is bedridden.

The joke is exactly what you think it is.

Summary: Makoto Yuki watches Walter's Command Room recording and is alarmed by what he sees.

Walter's Video

Makoto Yuki was confused, when he clicked the console to try and watch the next video the screen was black. It appeared that the camera may have been broken. But he could hear some shuffling on the screen. He wasn't sure what was going on.

Then, he heard his voice.

"Alright. It's finally time that I teach you all how to cook." Water White exclaimed on the recording.

Alarm bells immediately started ringing in his head at that. …Did he just say?

"Hell yeah! I've been waiting for this, Mr. White!" Junpei's voice came from the screen.

Junpei?!

"That's my line." Akihiko grumbled.

Akihiko?!

"Eh… Come on… Your line, my line. I just wanted to say it one time." Junpei laughed.

"I've been waiting for this!" Another shrill voice yelled on the recording.

FUUKA?! His eyes widened even further in shock. He didn't want to believe it. He could somewhat understand Junpei to a degree, he looked up to Mr. White and maybe Junpei thought the drugs were like protein powder to help with his workouts or something... But Fuuka?!

"You're right, that is fun!" She giggled.

"See, you get it, Fuuka!" Junpei still kept a rather jovial tone. She couldn't help but chuckle too. "Don't you wanna try, Yuka-tan?"

"You're a moron." The girl groaned.

YUKARI TOO?!

"You don't have to make fun of him." A much lower, feminine voice added.

MITSURU?! Now he knew he must've been dreaming or something because there is no way the girl that outed Mr. White to all of them would now want to be learning how to cook his meth. What was going on?! Were they going to be Persona users and criminals now? That didn't seem like a good combination that would ever work.

"I knew I could count on you, Mitsuru-senpai!"

There was a pause.

"I would prefer if you would remove your arm from my shoulder, Junpei-san."

There was an awkward chuckle and more shifting.

"You see why I make fun of him?" Yukari deadpanned.

"Fair enough." Mitsuru agreed.

"You really do strike out with all the girls, do you?" A much higher pitched younger voice asked.

KEN?! Makoto was flabbergasted. Walter brought a CHILD to cook his meth with him?! Is he out of his mind?!

"Striking out is Junpei's specialty, as they say." Another more monotonous voice confirmed.

He actually wasn't as surprised by Aigis' presence at this point.

"Guys, can we all focus?" Walter's voice came again.

This time another voice joined the fray. His, that of an adult male but a lot smoother and silkier. "Oh, I am so excited to learn Walter White's famous recipe!"

IKUTSUKI?!

"When you brought it in to share with the staff that day, we all couldn't get enough! And now we all get to learn from the master himself? Gosh, I must be the president of the United States cuz I'm in the White House right now?"

You then could hear him waiting for a response.

None came, just the groans of everyone, including Walter.

But even through all of that the only thought on his mind was that HE BROUGHT IT TO THE SCHOOL?!

He could see it now. In his mind, he was standing at the open door to Gekkoukan High's faculty office. Mr. Miyahara going on and on about his precious numbers a mile a minute writing all sorts of complex mathematical equations on the walls, his third eye opened. Oda, high as a kite, back in his beloved Sengoku period pretending that he was a samurai and breaking all sorts of things in the room. Then there would be Mr. Edogawa, would have been casting a spell right in the middle of the faculty office and one would hope that it wasn't one that would require a human sacrifice. Ikutsuki would be leaning over his shoulder as he was preparing those ingredients for his spell explaining to him that he was a moron and that there were shadows and the dark hour and Personas and that he'll never have any real magic because it was all science at the end of the day. And Elizabeth was there for some reason, just kinda there. He wasn't sure why but she waved at him. And the rest were all giggling excitedly talking about who knows what in the corner. All the while, Walter leaned on his desk, smiled at him and raised a mug of steaming hot coffee in his direction.

"Listen, you all have to take this seriously. This is a delicate procedure." Walter confirmed. Makoto was confused until he snapped back to reality, sitting in the chair in the command room again. He blinked, confused. But Walter continued in the recording. "It takes the perfect measurement of the ingredients, cooked at the perfect temperature and for the perfect period of time. One wrong move and you will destroy the entire batch."

Makoto was alarmed at this point. So everyone had decided to learn how to cook Walter's meth? Just like that?

"Well then, there's no time like the present! Let's get started!" Mitsuru announced.

And just like that, the feed finally switched back on and it showed all of SEES, all in aprons, standing in the kitchen with all sorts of ingredients in front of them.

"This breakfast isn't going to cook itself!" Walter announced. "The omelets need to be perfect and the bacon, fried at the perfect temperature for just long enough to get it crispy but not burnt. Because if you can't do it right, then why do it all?"

Everyone nodded in agreement and immediately got to work cooking.

Makoto Yuki slumped back in the chair and let out the heaviest most relieved sigh that he ever had in his life. It was just breakfast. Of course it was just breakfast. How could he be so stupid?

"And when we're done with all that, we can cook some of that Crystal? Huh, Mr. White?" Junpei asked on the recording.

There were some laughs, Yukari simply hit him upside the head, which warranted in more laughs.

Walter just chuckled and shook his head. "Junpei, I would never do that."

Makoto really should've had more faith in his teacher and his teammates.

So unlike the other parts of Crystallization, I wrote this dumb joke in an hour.

I've been enjoying Persona 3 Reload though. I'm a slow gamer and am in mid-October and yes, I got to the moment and am devastated but God, that scene was amazing.

But in game, I kinda forgot about the recordings and watched like 3 of them in a row last night and so I just bumrushed those 3 and that made me think of Walter's video and then the idea clicked and I am now writing this author's note lol.

Don't ask me where Shinji is in this fic, idk. He already knows how to cook and thought it was a waste of time. Yeah, that's what I'm going with.

I do intend to do more Crystallization as I've said I have all sorts of different ideas for it like I've said. But this spur of the moment idea was funny and needed to come out now.

If you read my other work, more specifically Sonic, I haven't abandoned it but writers block is a pain but I haven't given up on it.

Hope you enjoyed this little drabble R&R.