Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
"If you could go back and change one thing, what would it be?" It was Ron who drunkenly posed the question at the time waving the bottle sparking off Harry's curiosity.
Night time had fallen upon Hogwarts as if finally saying the day was over. There was a sound of wood burning in the air, the only sound present after he spoke.
Smoke rising into the sky had the attention of the gathering as they watched it rise and dissipate. The simple little action served to soothe their minds over the tragedy that befell them all.
'Or rather calamity.' Harry added without a hint of humor. There was no fun to be had here.
He glanced at the faces around the campfire. It did not matter your age for it was fleeting. Nor your experience for it was immaterial.
Death showed they were all equals in the grand scheme of things. He knew that well now. No amount of power chasing or running would change it. It was alpha and omega.
"...I would have spent more time with her." Parvati Patil said, interrupting his thought process. He slowly turned his eyes over to the girl, seeing the red eyes, the messed up hair and the tear marks on the side of her face.
A normal appearance of a number of those here.
Harry watched as her sister squeezed her hand but said little. A bond between sisters he mused silently. No words needed to be said.
He looked at the girl silently remembering once feeling so bad for the night of the yule ball. At the time it seemed like he was the biggest muck up of them all.
Now? Now he felt nothing. It wasn't even the slightest blimp on his radar. The only constant thought was why he wasn't better.
"I wish I told him I loved him." He looked at the voice that cracked trying to figure out who he was before it clicked. Colin Creevey's brother huh? Harry clenched his knee as he remembered seeing the body.
Just lying there. Dead to the world. The expression of pain and surprise dashed on the face.
It was horrifying.
Just another name on Voldemort's mad quest. His misguided attempt for power. How easily he caused lives to be snuffed just by existing. Causing so much damage without contributing anything to anyone.
A true textbook definition of a leech. An overgrown one who had no right getting so big. Becoming such an enormous problem to everyone involved.
Harry glanced around with unseeing eyes. He heard everything. From Mrs Weasley's regrets, Susan Bones laments and Seamus's fears.
He listened to even the Syltherins whom he couldn't name most, the Ravenclaws and the Hufflepuffs. The alcohol had loosened many tongues though not many people were here.
The night evolved as they moved on from their regrets to the fear of the future. Some who had siblings with terminal futures, others whose futures were uncertain with the upheaval that was Voldemort.
Those who were crippled with dark magic and would have to live through it for the majority of their lives.
Those who were disillusioned with the society they were in. The ministry who caused nearly just as much harm as Voldemort. Who would sit here and honestly hope that things would get better?
'And it all comes back to that no nose having wanker!' Harry finally felt something filling his chest. It burned something fierce and spread to all corners of his body.
Rage. Deep seated primal rage. The likes he couldn't have even imagined before. He didn't feel at peace having come to terms with death. Nor did he feel triumph at the death of Voldemort.
No, the man took too much from them for that to ever satisfy him. He got off Scott free in Harry's opinion.
He wanted more. He wanted complete domination.
His journey to change what he once knew was an arduous one. Even with his new found fame he knew he couldn't be too quick about it. He couldn't allow anyone to know what he was planning.
They'd think him crazy no doubt. A complete nut who needed help mentally.
Harry knew better however. He didn't need help. He needed to get his hands on Voldemort again. Needed to see him bleed.
He needed to see him despair. For Sirius, Tonks, Remus, Fred…
And above all he needed to make things right. All of this was his fault. He caused this.
Had he been just a bit more focused, just a bit more talented and hardworking he was sure he could stop this. Because of his incompetence others suffered.
When he should have been searching arcane arts he was practicing quidditch. When he was supposed to be bringing down the fall of Voldemort he was slacking off trying to live a normal life.
What was wrong with him? Why was he so laid back and relaxed when death stalked him towards every corner? Why was he so casual when the lives of others were held in his hands?
Why was he so mediocre? Why couldn't he have lived to the hype people had for him once upon a time? If he was more like professor Dumbeldore he was sure that…
Even that Snape would have done better than him…
Well.
No more.
Harry took out a quill and an enchanted book. He was now inside Sirius' old home. The stuffy dark place that once caused shivers down his spine now comforted him.
The dreary place now matched his mindset. He could see the appeal in it now. It was quiet and the ambience only further served to enhance his work ethic.
He had his plan and now it was time to get to the meat of it. He would change everything for the better. How exactly? He didn't know. But he just knew he would.
If that made sense.
He may not be the most talented but if he spent enough time. Gave enough blood and even more effort he was sure..
Sure he would succeed.
He turned his head looking at the penhesive. Getting up he moved his wand towards his head and extracted his memory.
Placing it down into the device he watched as it shifted and changed to his desire.
'Let us begin.' He thought such a thing, placing his head inside. Feeling the familiar experience he opened his eyes looking around.
"Hagrid." Harry looked in a bit of amusement at the man. It was his first time seeing him that he chose to start with. The beginning of every tragedy that he had access to.
For he needed to start at the beginning to end it all. Because without understanding only ignorance was left.
"Never seen you like this mate! Anything I need to know?" Ron jested as the 3 teens walked to headmistress McGonagall's office letters in hand.
It was from Kingsley Shacklebolt. The new minister of magic asking for assistance in dealing with the aftermath. They were going to the headmistress to tell her their responses.
"Mmm. I've just been feeling a bit under the weather, no need to worry." Harry caught the undertone of concern in his voice and nearly smiled.
Nearly.
"..." Ron nodded but said little else. He felt he couldn't understand Harry a bit more everyday and it worried him. He couldn't remember the last time his best time was unreadable.
Hermione eyed the raven haired teen. She had been watching Harry keenly for quite some time having already caught the subtle change. She knew her boys like that.
The perpetual grief that was stuck in his eyes was still there however it wasn't quite as prominent anymore. Something else took its place.
The Harry she knew. The one after the battle that is, had his back a bit slouched, his pace dragged a bit and his tone unenthusiastic.
Those things hadn't changed much but there was a certain power in his step. A certainty.
'Or is it conviction?' She smiled at him when he turned to her with a raised eyebrow.
"Ronald is right, Harry James Potter. You seem ready to do something quite stupid. Anything I need to know?" She raised an eyebrow right back making sure he knew he wouldn't get by without an answer.
Literally that is. Both her and Ronald were blocking his way afterall.
Harry paused in his steps. Looking at their crossed arms he had already anticipated this and was already prepared. Still he hesitated. He hadn't lied much to them but he knew he couldn't tell them the truth now.
They wouldn't understand and they would begin to move away. Or perhaps they would understand too much and stop him before he did something crazy.
"Well." He sighed out loud. The best lie was one that was as true as it could be. He learned that from Hermione herself.
"I've been thinking." He glared at the "Oh no." That came from Ron.
"Like I was saying. I've been thinking of becoming the best version of myself that I can. To honor the deaths of those who died because of me. I can't slack off when others would kill to be here…" He trailed off realizing what he said hit a bit too close to home.
He looked at the complicated eyes of his two best friends. Hermione opened her mouth hesitantly but closed it with a clack.
"Mate. That sounds good on paper and all but.." Ron tried telling him exactly what was wrong with that.
"I know. I know. Though I can't help what I feel right? Trust me I'm trying to get better so don't worry, okay?" He walked forward placing his arms on them, turning around.
He ignored the awkward looks as he brought them forward.
"Let's just focus on the future now."
'How ironic.' He smiled.
"Mate what!" Ron was shocked
"Harry, I'm so happy!" Hermione nearly broke his spine.
"Quite the mature decision Mr. Potter." And the professor/headmistress was in her default state.
Harry got 3 different responses from his decision. Betrayal, happiness, and pride.
He had decided to stay at Hogwarts to further his education and goal. He would always have access to Grimmauld Place but Hogwarts was a bit more complicated.
It would be difficult to come and get information without drawing attention if he wasn't a student. So he would use the year given to him to get everything he could. He was sure it would be enough.
"Yes professor, I've decided it would be best to stay here. A little time to calm down would do wonders for my mind." He responded looking directly in her eyes.
"Well I for one am happy you will be continuing your tenure here Mr. Potter. Quite frankly your duty is done for our country." She nodded strongly glad the young man would get rest.
'My duty isn't done until I'm dead.' He looked over to Ron who spoke.
"Mate? Weren't we in this together? What's with this now?" Ron looked at him with deep disappointment and a little anger. They had already agreed on this didn't they?!
Harry sighed.
"Don't think I don't know what you did Harry." Hermione whispered when they sat down for lunch. She had been shocked seeing how he pacified Ron and it caused her not to be able to stop him.
Not that she knew if she would now. He had left so much happier she doubted she could tell him the Auror life wasn't that glamorous.
She saw Harry look at her in confusion as she rolled her eyes.
"It's obvious you played on insecurities leading him to believe that he would be able to carve his own name at the aurors without you! It's not hard to see but it's hard to think you did it!" She knew Harry was smart in his own sassy, sarcastic way but this was a more cunning manipulative smart.
She didn't know if she liked it or not.
"Well nothing I said wasn't true right?" Harry shrugged, loading his plate.
"He'll be known for however he does there. I won't be there to outshine him just by my fame. I think it's a good thing really. He needs something for himself without me. He's his own man." Harry mused, not noticing the wide eyes at his maturity.
Hermione sat and didn't question him anymore on it but she did glance at him from time to time. This was a new Harry Potter wasn't it?
"Now where to start?" Harry mused as he walked the library. How did one even begin with what he needed? He certainly didn't have the slightest clue.
Walking the long library he decided that perhaps the restricted section would have what he needed? He didn't dally when the thought caught on.
He walked inside not pausing knowing no one would question him being here if he didn't make a big problem of it. As he reached inside he glanced at the numerous tomes before pulling out his wand.
Remembering his experience during his first year he checked for any curses, jinxes or any plain annoying things.
Finding them he ignored them promptly before looking over to a certain shelf. Gliding over he looked at the books on it before his eyes picked out a certain title.
'Introduction to the Esoteric Arts'
That was as good a place to start as any he reckoned. Picking it up he spied a table nearby as he sat and got to work.
It would be hours before he left with wide eyes. They were definitely called esoteric for a reason! However he left with his spirits lighter.
He at least found something towards his insane goal! The first step was always the hardest.
Days later after constant research and making nice with the Hogwarts population trying his best to maintain a happy facade to soothe others Harry got the dreaded note.
It was quick. Had he not been trying his best to get better and not be as lazy as he was before he doubted he would have seen it slipped in his pocket.
The redheaded spitfire that was his ex seemed to pick up a thing or two from her brothers with the way she made it so natural.
Standing in front of the room of requirement his heart pounded in dread at what he was about to do. He had gotten especially spiffy and he had come up with many reasons why they couldn't work out.
He definitely liked her. He knew that for sure. When she stopped being so shy he saw the little firecracker she truly was. She was as quirky as the best of them. Drop dead gorgeous too.
She also knew how to knock sense into him when needed but he couldn't allow that to happen. He needed to focus on hid goal.
So pushing open the door he puffed his chest out ready to break her heart before his own heart stopped.
"Ah Harry? Please close the door~ This is about to be a very intimate conversation." Harry felt his heart pound as he laid eyes on her. He closed the door as he took hesitant steps forward.
Everything he had once thought flew out of his mind as he came forward laying eyes on her.
She was perfect.
His first thought was that he entered some luxurious room but that changed when he recognized most things here. It was the girls dorm room but it was changed to only have one bed in the middle.
A big bed was facing the door. The red bed sheets contrasted the girl nicely Harry thought walking behind her looking down steam puffing from his nose. It was a regular reaction for any man who saw the sight.
"G-Gin…what is this?" He placed a hand onto the curve of her ass. He could feel himself throbbing looking at her. She wasn't wearing a bra either. Her creamy tits ballooned onto her sides making an enticing sight.
They had grown quite a bit since he had last looked at them well.
She was leaning over the bed facing away from him, only turning her head to look back at him. Her red hair fell to the side, and her upper body was entirely on the bed with her arms propping her up a bit.
As she leaned forward she revealed her full, lush thighs and her vermillion panties tightly covering her puffy pussy. He could see the outline of the no doubt soft flesh swallowing the poor lingerie. The two lips nearly completely engulfed it!
"Ah you see I already predicted you were going to try to break up with me." She wiggled her hips as they jiggled in his sight. The gelatin-like orbs hypnotized him. He kneeled looking at the motion with wide eyes.
Feeling him cup her ass she continued smiling.
"So I decided. If you can still muster the will to reject me after tonight? I'll cut off my losses." She looked back at him as their eyes connected. She tried pouring in how much she did not want to lose him.
She needed him in her life and she hoped he needed her too. She had waited too long for him to leave her like that.
She couldn't take another person leaving so quickly. That's why she needed to keep him by any means possible.
Harry felt his heart beat faster. He knew how much it took for her to do this. Especially after what happened. He didn't know if he should-
He paused in shock.
"Ah ah ah! None of that self pity shit Harry! Look!" Already knowing his que well even if he tried hiding them she unleashed her secret weapon as she shimmied the panties down.
Harry breathed heavily seeing the thin material glide over the perfect creamy ass before they rested at the bottom curve of her peach. Harry felt his meat throbbing fiercely as he saw the evidence of her arousal clinging from her plump lips drawing a line of drool to her red garment.
She looked back rolling her eyes at him. Honestly, how much did it take to break his control?!
"You see that? I hope you know what it is! It means I'm fucking horny! So get over here and oh god!" She squealed, feeling her cheeks spread apart and the tongue assaulting her lips!
"Thank you Gin." Harry said heavily feeling both satisfied and like a piece of shit. That was the best night of his life and he couldn't wish for a better way to lose his virginity.
The girl who was hugging him looked up at hearing the tone and sighed. She tried blinking the tears back knowing he was set on it. She shifted her legs still feeling sore.
"So that's it then? Guess we'll just-" She was interrupted as he held her lips. Looking up she saw his complicated face. She waited for him to speak and he delivered.
"Ginny, I won't lie to you. I'm going through some things right now. Like everyone I guess but…I've decided to do something that will change everything for all of us! Hopefully." He squeezed it out looking at her. He saw her wide eyes looking at him.
"You…" He felt his heart beat hearing the fear in her tone.
"You aren't gonna become a dark lord are you?!" She screamed in mock shock gasping as she got up.
He looked as her round perky set of breast jumped and jiggled. The pink caps and puffy nipples were well bruised. Stopping his observation he looked up at her glaring a bit.
"No. Of course not!" He immediately shut her down with a roll of the eye.
"Oh well you were sounding quite dark lordish" She shrugged before plopping down again. She breathed out looking at him as she took his hand.
"So what you're saying is this relationship will inevitably cause your goal to slow down? I've never heard you so determined to do something." She cupped his chin feeling the fuzziness. Her man errr ex man? Was growing a little scruffy beard.
How cute.
"It's hot." She stated her feelings to it.
"Yeah. So I can't.. we can't…" He sighed out finding the words hard. If he did so it would no doubt cause him to never finish ever. He would never not commit to a relationship and that would take priority over what he was doing now.
Ginny scratched his chin as she thought about it. She didn't want to lose him…but she also wasn't going to wait years like he was making it out to be. So she found a compromise.
"How about this?" She patted his chest feeling his muscles. She could feel his chin tilting downwards.
"We break up. You go do whatever it is you want and I do the same. I've been thinking about trying for the harpies before all this terrible stuff started happening so a relationship would probably cause issues." She didn't really think that. However she said it for his benefit. She knew he felt guilty for the littlest things so she'd try to make it less painful.
She closed her eyes, sighing.
"We go our separate ways. One day we'll come together and decide if we want to continue this relationship. Capisce?!" She barked at the boy who nodded slowly with a smile.
"However! For me being so generous with you there is a condition!" She purred out as she rolled onto him.
Harry held the young woman's hip quickly as she started grinding on him. He felt the aftershocks of pleasure as he stiffened.
Looking up at the beautiful girl he grunted. "What do you want, Gin? I'll try my best to fulfill it!"
The girl smiled like a cat that caught the canary. Exactly what she wanted to hear.
"How manly!~" She leaned forward cupping his head as she whispered.
"Anytime I want I'm going to come to your place and take a nice wild ride on this monster you have! You got that?!" She punctuated it with a rough rub.
"?!" Harry looked up not at all expecting it. If they broke up shouldn't they-
"Unless you want someone else to deal with this itch you made-" The girl giggled as she was flipped on her back moaning, feeling him sink inside. Curling her legs around him she couldn't help but roll her eyes.
'Boys!' Even the thought of letting someone else have her made him go crazy huh?
Well he better do his job.
Harry leaned on the wall sweating as he watched the girl leave with a pep in her step. He saw her twirl flashing him with a cheeky smile and cheeks.
As she left she told him one last thing. "By the way I want you and everyone to know that I stole your virginity and I allowed you to have mine! You didn't give it to me!"
Finished with that she cackled and turned out of the corridor.
Patting his pocket Harry felt the red garment inside it. He couldn't help but gulp after getting caught in hurricane Ginny. Had he been a bit less willed he was sure he'd cave to her.
Luckily he knew he couldn't just do it. He had something far more important that needed his time and energy. He was sure they'd all be better for it.
Now if only he knew how to reach there.
"What is that Harry?" Hermione sat next to him in potions class as they had reached a bit early. She had seen the book before but knew it was getting more and more frequent seeing him with it.
If he wasn't writing in it, he was reading over it or charming it with his wand. She had resisted for a valiant amount of time before caving. Well a valiant amount of time for her anyway. Which wasn't long at all.
Harry didn't pause as he answered her. He knew his friend to well so he already had a answer prepared for her. Like he said before.
Always stick close to the truth.
"I'm making a catalog or maybe a journal? Well a journal of everything I've ever experienced since I knew I was a wizard." He answered her with a smile as her eyes blinked.
"Well! That is a delightful idea Harry! With how much you've experienced already I'm sure you'll have your hands full with such a project!" Hermione smiled. Oh how she loved seeing him become more academically inclined. She had noticed his work was improving quickly too.
She was past that awful jealousy phase she had and she could feel the full pride and happiness at seeing him better himself. It was great to see him distracting himself from everything war wise.
'Speaking of that.' She paused her unpacking as she slowly turned towards him.
"So Harry, will you be attending the Malfoy's trial?" She asked, seeing him pause. If she didn't know better she would have thought he had completely forgotten about it.
But that couldn't be right. Right?
"Oh yeah don't worry. I'll be there for sure." He looked away sweating seeing the brown eyes bore holes into him.
Man she got creepy when she was ready.
Anyway he would go. He needed to ask Narcissa a question about her crazy bitch of a sister anyway. He had found something at Grimmauld Place and he couldn't help but be curious no matter how much he hated her.
Bellatrix Black. Was she sane once upon a time? How did she become Voldemort's deranged cunt and try to kill her family in the process?
Afterall the childlike drawings she made and letters to her family painted a completely different picture.
And who the bloody hell was Delphine?
"Mr. Potter? I'm surprised to see you visiting me. Something I need to be worried about?" The woman crossed her legs and posed as she looked up at the boy who came in.
Young man was more like it. He had become quite something from the shrimp she remembered him as. Especially when he sought to dress so much better.
She watched as he talked down the guards. From what she heard he wasn't supposed to even be here.
Interesting.
"Nothing insidious Mrs. Malfoy. I just came to ask some questions." Harry sat inside the cell with his quill and book. At this point he was documenting any and everything.
"Nothing pertaining to our trials I hope? I'm afraid I'll have to disappoint you." She shook her head placing her lidded eyes onto the boy.
While she wasn't as hard headed as her husband she wasn't interested in self sabotage.
"..." Harry paused observing the woman. Even in the prisoner gown she was quite something. The blonde hair was swept back in a braid which she obviously made and he could see her soft mounds in full.
Though he didn't continue his observations. It wasn't the time. Nor place.
Nor person for that matter. He would never ogle Malfoy's mum. That was disgusting.
"Mrs. Malfoy it's about…Bellatrix Lestrange." He mused seeing her pause.
"My sister? I'm surprised Mr. Potter. I've already heard of what she did to Sirius …" she trailed off seeing him look down a bit.
"You're right, however I found some things that interested me." He pulled out the bag as he took out the items.
Narcissa watched as the familiar drawings came on the table. Along with an unfamiliar book.
"I see you are Lord Black now?" She mused sorting through the items. She was hit with a quick wave of nostalgia seeing the innocent drawings.
Back to a simpler time. Not easier. She wasn't one to allow such things to cloud her mind.
She remembered vividly how difficult it was to live even back then.
"Bellatrix was always a normal child just like everyone else. If you can believe it she was just a bit more regal than even me. Yes I know." she raised a hand to her mouth seeing his shock.
"Truly!? That rabid bitc-'' He paused. While he didn't care a lot about her it was still a bit much to mention a dead sister to one who was currently imprisoned.
He had that much tact.
Seeing him struggle she sighed softly. "Mr Potter? I know my sister is a…how do you say it? A rabid animal that needed to be put down. It hurts but… she was no longer who she used to be."
'She wasn't my sister for a long time.'
"I see but.." He took the journal that she didn't take and handed it to her.
His face was complicated as he saw her reading it. As her eyes widened with every letter and word he said.
"That runs contrary to everything you said doesn't it?"
"Thank you Potter." She nodded as they left the court. She had sought him out after he vouched for her and Draco to send her thanks. She didn't think she had given him the impression that she was such a individual but she would accept it all the same.
"Thank me? Your son is still spending 5 years in prison." He looked at her a bit funnily. He felt she would be more angry that he couldn't do much there.
She shook her head. "It would have been 30 without your interference and I would have gotten 5 myself. Now I'm just on house patrol and my son doesn't spend the rest of his life in jail."
She paused as he did the same. They both didn't mention exactly what happened to her late husband. She had seen his eyes when the man was mentioned and it shook her a bit.
She had thought with him asking about her sister had meant he had let go of some of his anger. She was wrong she realized.
It was because she was dead that he didn't seem to hate her as much. She shuddered to think what would happen had the woman survived...
"Well you got to keep some of your assets which means you're still rich." He rolled his eyes at the thought. Even with most gone the amount he heard they still had was a bit ridiculous.
"True enough Mr. Po-"
"Call me Harry. After all, we are going to see each other more often, right? Aunt Narcissa." He smiled with full teeth seeing her stiffen.
She had a child to take care of after all.
"Mr Potter I highly doubt that Bellatrix even has a child and even if she did I am not fit to-"
"Mrs Malfoy I'm under no illusions that you are a good person. Or even a decent one." He placed her on her shoulder as she stiffened.
Harry looked at her with dead eyes. This woman should get the memo. He helped her now she needed to help him. He had no wish for some crazy spawn of that bitch to come back and try to kill him or his friends.
"So I'm telling you. You will raise that girl and you will do so normally. Not filling her head with bullshit like you did Draco but as a normal girl. I will be checking in on you to make sure you and her are doing okay."
He looked into her face seeing the pursed lips and wide eyes.
"Understand?"
"Yes Potter."
"Call me Harry."
Harry had gotten to his 4th year when writing things in his little journal when he had his first breakthrough.
"Arcind Joshi?" It was the name that he found under constant hours of searching. There weren't many books on what he was looking for and even the ones he found didn't actually focus on how to get started.
However this name mentioned in the book seemed to say this man was trying to pioneer a way to go back in time.
Exactly what he was looking for however he could find nothing else on him. As if he disappeared from history…
Harry had a wild thought before he shook his head. He let go of it. He couldn't just go back and…
He had succumbed.
Harry sighed as he looked at the stone in his hand. It had been a week of deliberation when he decided to go and find it. He needed to get help on what he was looking for and this was just what he needed to skip the process.
Looking at it reluctantly he sighed before he flipped it 3 times as he called upon the one he needed.
He watched as the shade slowly appeared before his eyes looking around with a confused tilt before focusing on him.
"Arcind Joshi?"
"In the ghostly flesh I believe young man."
The man did not in fact try to pioneer a way for time travel. No he was murdered for trying to temporarily break apart the fabric of reality to send something back in time.
He had failed horribly but he had claimed he was the one who opened the veil of death. After hearing exactly what he sacrificed to do so Harry promptly sent him on his way.
He had no time for wanton murderers.
However this gave him an idea…
If he could use the stone to bring back someone from such a long time back.
Who else could he bring back?
Time wasn't something so easily manipulated. At least not by a single wizard.
How about 2 wizards? Or 5? 10? 100? 1000?
A great amount of genius wizards and witches all at his disposal.
He was sure with this he would be able to change everything. After all, didn't he already know time travel was possible in a form?
Of course he vastly overestimated their usefulness. What he summoned were simply shades of people. Gaps of knowledge and constantly trying to get you killed didn't make for good conversations or anything particularly well structured.
Still he could work with this.