Regular - story
Italicized - thoughts
Chapter 17
Wellesley - In Zoro's Nightmare
The first few seconds after walking into the fear fog were suffocating. Air was thick, metallic, and humid as I swirled around me. My grip on Zoro's shirt ceased to matter as the fabric began dissolving from my hands the second I was fully engulfed, and then I suddenly felt like I was in free fall. I'd been in Fredric's nightmares many times, but this was the first time I'd entered willingly. Instead of struggling, I let the current of the fog carry me away on a thick black current. I knew I wasn't actually falling, just my mind being taken to another destination. I tried to hold on to the image of Zoro standing before me for as long as possible before my vision went out.
I floated in the darkness for an unknowable amount of time before a flush of heat swam over me. Golden sunlight filtering through lush greenery is what woke me. I felt the sun's heat, hot on my skin, and the humidity dampened my hair and lashes. I was surrounded by the fresh, earthy scent of bamboo, interwoven with the sweet fragrance of blossoming flowers. The ground was hard compacted dirt below me, and I could feel the starts of bamboo shoots stabbing into my ass and shoulder.
I cracked an eye open only to slam it shut immediately when blinded by the intense sunlight. Shielding my face with my hands, I reopened them again, much slower this time. I was immediately caught off guard by the beauty surrounding me. Thick bamboo, lush fern, and bright white lily of the valley ringed the small clearing I found myself in. There was a slash of the tall bamboo surrounding me, casting crisscrossing shadows across my body. Birds twittered and fluttered above me, their songs melodic and soothing. Insects buzzed loudly in the nearby brush, their trill energetic and abrasive to the ear. I sat up slowly, my body aching with phantom pains that had long since healed. My legs shook as I got to my feet. I wiped dirt on my pants and tried to get a sense of where I was and where Fredric may have sent Zoro. Anxiety swelled in my chest as I spun in a circle, each direction looking exactly the same as the last.
The bamboo around me was thick. It was so dense in some places that I couldn't see more than ten feet past the first few rows. Other than the birds and the bugs, I didn't hear or see anything else. I appeared to have been dropped in the middle of an uninhabited forest with no idea where to go. I knew I didn't have long before Fredric either lost his concentration and this world dissolved, or he lost patience and just shot into the fog, hoping to kill us both. I needed to move! I took a deep breath to try and settle my racing heart and quiet my thoughts.
Years ago, my mother had used the power of the soothsy to find my father when he and his hunting party had gone missing in the mountains. She'd tried to describe to my siblings and me the pull she felt toward the person fate had chosen. She said it felt like a tingle in your gut that spread and got warmer the closer you got to them. The trick was that you had to quiet your mind and empty it of everything else. That was all well and good in theory, but I'd never been great at emptying my mind at the best of times. Now, especially, my mind was in utter chaos. All I could think about was what might be happening in reality to Nami, Sanji, and the others. I clutched my fists tight, squeezed my eyes closed, and brought Zoro to the front of my mind. I tried to focus on how he looked the first time I saw him, how he smiled at me as he offered to kill Marcus for me, his face as the fog swallowed him up.
The tug at my navel was startling, even though I was searching for it. My eyes flew wide with the sensation, the tingle urging me to go south. I took a deep, fortifying breath and began to move. Bamboo stabbed into my feet with almost every step, but it healed as soon as my foot lifted, so I tried my best to ignore it and continued on. The bamboo got darker before it got lighter. I'd been dropped into a clearing, and as I moved out of it and into the forest proper, it became denser and darker; the thick canopy almost completely blotted out the sun. The dark was stifling with the midmorning heat, and sweat ran in rivulets down my back. The stalks of bamboo grew close together, forcing me to have to squeeze and duck between them constantly.
Stumbling around in the dark, I should have been hopelessly lost. But the tug at my navel, a strange yet comforting sensation, kept me on track. The warm feeling turning to bouts of nausea with even one step in the wrong direction. After what felt like an eternity, the foliage began to thin. The gaps between bamboo widened, and signs of life sprouted up around me. I passed an abandoned tool shed; the thatched roof caved in and moldy. Close to it, several small homes sat between the bamboo. A few had laundry out on a line, a sign that people were still living there, so I kept to the shade still provided by the forest. I could just hear the sound of children playing and their mothers hollering for them as I walked around a bend, and the houses and their inhabitants fell out of sight.
I was carefully picking my way around the bend when the ground beneath me suddenly dipped, and I tumbled face-first down a steep incline. I tumbled head over foot for several seconds before landing hard at the bottom on my hands and knees. Frustrated, I smashed my fist against the hard soil I'd landed on. "Son of a fucking bitch!"
Shallow gasps ran out of me as I breathed slowly while a few minor abrasions on my palms, shins, and forehead healed. Not for the first time, wishing that my ability came with limited pain and not just quick healing. A drop of blood dripped off my eyebrow, and before it hit the dirt below, the scrap across my eyebrow, along with the other scraps and bumps, had healed. I shakily got back to my feet and spun in circles till the sour feeling in my stomach sweetened out. It was a fight to keep my mind clear, and the edge of panic kept trying to creep in as minutes passed with nothing happening.
Finally, it clicked; a feeling like slipping into a warm bath settled over me, chasing away the lingering cold fear. I felt lighter and breathing came easier as my rising panic faded, and with renewed energy, I took off toward the direction it was pointing me, toward Zoro. There were way fewer bamboo shoots growing in this area, making walking much quicker and less painful. Eventually, I found myself on a well-worn footpath full of potholes and deep ruts in the dirt from cart tires. A smacking sound started to get louder and louder slowly as I neared the edge of the forest.
I exited the forest and was immediately blinded by the bright sunlight that the shade gave way to. As I blinked the spots from my vision, I was surprised to see a bustling farming village. The sun was high, indicating that it was close to noon—harried mothers with small children hustled by with baskets and bags tucked tight under their arms. Older children chased each other, kicking a bright red ball back and forth as they let out elated shrieks. Men were building what appeared to be a new house right at the edge of a soybean field, their hammers making the rhythmic sound that had led me from the forest.
They all seemed happy and went about their tasks with content and purpose, oblivious to the sudden appearance of a rumpled stranger in their midst. I was momentarily stunned, still at the edge of the forest. I had never seen such a peaceful scene in one of Fredric's fearscapes. My pulse raced as I started toward the village, sure something would jump out at me any second.
I tried to follow the tug in my gut, but the noise and chaos of the busy village screwed up my concentration, and the connection was lost. The sights and smells of the village shattered my concentration in seconds. I hadn't been around this many people in ages, and the noise was enough to set my teeth on edge. A frustrated grunt left me, and I continued to stick to the edge of the bamboo, hoping the distance from the noise might help me get the connection back up and running. It didn't work; adrenaline was pumping too fast through my veins now that I was so close. I mourned the loss of the connection I'd only just found.
Staying at the edge of the forest was getting me nowhere. I glanced nervously at the village and the people bustling by. If Zoro was in this village chances are someone might know where. He seems like the sort that would stick out after all. Taking a fortifying breath, I cut behind a squat home with a spiral of smoke drifting up from it. There was a family sitting around a low table that I could see through a window. They appeared to be eating a mid-day meal. I watched for a moment, absorbed in this moment of familial bliss. I watched as the father placed a gentle kiss on his wife's cheek as she passed him a bowl of ice. She smiled warmly at him, a blush pinkening her cheeks as she patted their son on his head. The boy appeared no more than three, and he was trying to tell his father something that appeared to be of grave importance, though he seemed unable to yet fully articulate the words.
My heart wrenched at the sight. This was what my family had been. Whole and happy and so sure of the love we shared for one another. I was glad this still existed somewhere, even if it was inside a fictional universe. It took great effort, but eventually, I made a break for their backyard, where I snatched an old dress off a clothesline. It was simple, green with a scoop neck and lace trim along the skirt. I quickly shed my torn and bloody clothing, stashing it in their compost bin before booking it two yards over. Only once the house was fully out of sight did I slow down and start listening to what was happening around me.
I passed a general store, a bar, and an open-air market. I didn't hear anything about a swordsman or even a man with green hair. I was starting to think this was a bust and decided that if I didn't hear something by eavesdropping soon, I'd have to just straight up ask people. The very idea was giving me a headache, the pain bouncing back and forth across my temples as I crossed into another residential area. As I passed a low open building full of women washing laundry, I heard one say, "Did you hear Master Zoro is finally taking over the dojo?"
I froze midstep and pressed against the porch side to peek in the window. Another woman wearing a pale pink yukata said, "Oh really? That's great for him." She paused, and an uncertain look settled in her pale eyes. "And his wife?" Her voice was hesitant.
Wife. A flustered, jealous feeling started to dig roots in my stomach, and I tried hard to smother it. It's not like this is even real. And he's not mine to feel possessive over anyway. I shook my head and moved closer to the window that was obscured mostly by a large wisteria bush. I could see the woman wearing a similar yukata to the first but in bright yellow, wringing out a white sheet with dainty peach-colored flowers printed on it. She turned her head and gave her friend a sad look I didn't understand and then shook her head, loose strands of hair escaping her bun to frame her face.
"You know how Kuina is. She's been sneaking off to train every spare minute she gets. Never mind, she just had their son two weeks ago. My sister Mai works as a cleaner at the dojo, and she told me she heard a little spat between father and daughter. She said she heard Koushirou tell Kuina that she didn't put enough thought into the actual running of the dojo and training of the students. He apparently thinks she thinks too much of the off-island dreams and not enough about what's happening here and now." My heart clenched tighter. A child. He has a child here. Fresh anger at Fredric festered inside me. Pain and anguish were a given inside these nightmares, but this felt like a step too far. The pain of losing something like that would be nearly unbearable.
Both women were silent for a moment, only the sound of water splashing in the washtub coming through the open window. I heard them begin to get to their feet. The washtub scraping against the floor as they hefted it up was the only sign I had that they were about to dump out over the side of the porch. I panicked and moved farther behind the bush, praying they wouldn't see me. Dirty wash water sloshed between my toes as they dumped it over the porch edge, turning the dirt into mud. Several tiny spiders ran from the mini flood, and several tried to run up my legs to escape. I slapped a hand over my mouth to hold in my panicked shriek and felt my skin shudder as their little legs skittered across my calves.
I batted at my legs, and once all the spider legs had fallen away, I took a deep breath and stepped a little closer to the porch, mud sucking at my bare toes. I watched Pink pull a hand-rolled cigarette and some matches from her pocket. She struck it and took a deep drag before passing it to her companion in yellow. They passed it back and forth for a moment before Pink finally broke the silence. "I hear she's going to leave."
Yellow's mouth fell open in shock. "What do you mean leave? Leave the island? What about their son? What about Zoro?"
Pink shrugged noncommittally, "She's always talked about leaving. Hell, they both used to before they got hitched. I'm just surprised she waited so long."
A harsh laugh I didn't like rolled out of Pink's wide lips around the cigarette. "Kuina's always been cold like that. She'd be gone already if she hadn't gotten knocked up." She lowered her voice and moved closer to her friend, "And from what Dr. Hana told me, she tried to have that terminated but was too far along for that to be an option. She apparently even had to be admitted for a while on suicide watch after she tried to," Pink waved her hands around as if looking for a polite way to say something before finally settling on something and using air quotes to say, "'self-terminate.'" If Yellow's eyes get any bigger, they're gonna fall out of her head. Pink's insensitivity was jarring, and even though she wasn't real, I had an instant dislike for her.
I felt sad for this woman they were talking about. An unwanted pregnancy is such a life-altering event. I'd seen enough of that in my years trapped with Marcus and the unfortunate women who had bared him children over the years. Finally, Yellow said in a hushed, scandalized voice, "Why would Dr. Hana tell you that? Seems kind of personal, private, don't cha think?" Pink's face flushed with pleasure, which struck me as wholly inappropriate given the context of their conversation. She then gave her friend a salacious smile and took a puff of the cigarette.
She blew out a stream of smoke and said, "Pillow talk." Yellow again looked shocked, and then she let out an exhilarated laugh and lightly pushed Pink's shoulder.
"How does your husband feel about that?"
Pink's smile grew wider. "Well, considering he was on the other side of me, I think he's pretty ok with it."
They shared a conspiratory laugh, and then their conversation had turned wholly to the sexual exploits of Pink, her husband, and their doctor, who, from the sound of it, was quite the contortionist. After Pink let out a raunchy cackle, she started talking about the pros and cons of different positions, and I had had enough. My face was hot, and I felt mildly embarrassed for listening for so long, but I'd never heard anyone talk about sex like that, like they enjoyed it. A split-second flash of Zoro and Sanji flashed through my head, followed quickly by shame and guilt. I shook my head hard to dislodge the images and tried to tell myself that the flush that had overcome me was from the heat and not... anything else.
With one last glance at the gossiping women, I began to quietly creep around the side of the house. Once I was sure no one was around to see me I booked it to the other side of the street. I couldn't stop thinking about those women. Their casual gossip about another woman's personal trauma disgusted me. I didn't know her; she probably wasn't even real, but she deserved more respect and discretion than the apparently chatty doctor in the village was capable of.
I tried to push past my disgust and focus on the bits of actual helpful information they had revealed. They had said Zoro was now the master of a dojo, so the first step was to find it. But I had no idea what a dojo was. What did it look like? Was it like an auditorium? A field? Inside? Outside? I wracked my brain as I stopped to lean against a squat little building to catch my breath. Based on the playground currently full of screaming and playing children, I thought it might be a school or daycare of some kind.
As I rested, I watched people bustle on by, arms full of odds and ends. Each person on their way to individual tasks, different schedules, and hobbies to attend to. Not for the first time, the realness of these fearscapes hit me. There was no reason this corner of the dream should be so thorough, so detailed, especially without Zoro here in the immediate vacinity. There were families sat round kitchen tables, children playing, men working hard to build homes no one would ever live in. All these fine details of a world that doesn't really exist are so pointless! Everything was perfect, down to the bees pollinating the flowers and the bird shit on the sidewalk.
I must have been way too lost in thought because a gentle tug on my pant leg made me jump and smack my head against the wall. "Fuck!"
Gently rubbing my tender scalp, I looked down, my other hand on my chest and heart racing; I saw a little girl. She couldn't have been older than five. Her hair was bubblegum pink and twisted up in lopsided pigtails. She was missing her right front tooth and had giant cocoa-brown eyes. She was dirty, but in the way children get after they have played hard all day rather than from neglect. She looked up at me curiously and tilted her head to the left.
"You just said a bad word! You'll have to put five berries in Ms. Aiko's swear jar." She turned her head and looked around, confused. "Whatcha doing sneaking behind the school with no shoes on?" She looked back at me, and a shy smile lit up her face. "Are you playing a game? Are you playing hide-and-seek?" Her already high voice pitched up several octaves in her excitement.
I had never had much of a chance to interact with children, so for a moment, I just stared at her, unsure what to say. Her smile began to dim the longer I stared. She started to look unsure and even took a half step back away from me. My heart ached at the loss of that smile. Finally, I stammered out, "Uh, um, yes, actually. My name is Wellesley. Me and my friend Zoro and I were playing hide-and-seek. But he's really good, and now I can't find him. Have you seen him anywhere?"
She stopped backing up. She let out a high giggle and did a little excited jump. "You were playing with Master Zoro?"
I smiled down at her, relieved that she had believed me, "Yes, that's right. I was playing with Master Zoro. Have you seen him?"
Hands on her hips, she looked at me curiously and said, "Well, ya, it's almost one. The kendo tournament is today." Then she looked at me in a childlike version of an oh-poor-you look. "He must not like you very much if he left you to look for him while he ran off to the dojo."
Her bluntness made me laugh, and I think it startled her as she started a little. "You're right. That wasn't very nice. Do you think you could show me where the dojo is so I can give him a piece of my mind?"
She gasped and looked around as if to make sure no one was listening. She leaned closer to me, put her hand near her mouth, and, in what I'm sure she thought was a whisper, asked, "I'd have to skip school, wouldn't I? I've never done that before." As she said that, a woman, Ms. Aiko, I'm assuming, yelled from the door to the building, "Alright, kids, recess is over. Please form an orderly line and file back into the classroom." The kids started groaning, begging for ten more minutes. Ms. Aiko just crossed her arms and stood near the doorway, a no-nonsense look on her face. The kids whined and grumbled, but they still started to form a loose version of the requested line, their feet dragging and kicking up dust.
The little girl let out a nervous giggle. She looked behind her at where her classmates were lining up and turned back to me with a grin. The last student had disappeared through the front door of the school. A moment later, Ms. Aiko came back out and scanned her eyes across the playground. "Suni! Where are you? It's time to come in!" The little girl, Suni, looked indecisive when her teacher called for her for all of one second before she grabbed my hand and started pulling me around the back of the building, quiet cackles flying from her the entire time. I felt terrible for the teacher, she was probably frantic to find her lost student. I just kept telling myself that this wasn't real and that finding Zoro was more important than soothing imaginary people's feelings.
I looked down at Suni fondly as we weaved through backyards and across alleyways before we started making our way up a hill. She reminded me of Celia when she was young, an endless ball of energy just waiting to explode outward. We followed the dirt path up the hill, wooden fencing barely holding back bamboo and lush flowers that were trying to encroach.
About halfway up, Suni came to an abrupt halt, her eyes sparkling with excitement. I had to quickly adjust my steps to avoid colliding with her. With a proud gesture, she pointed towards the top of the hill. "That's the dojo. Master Zoro is probably too busy to talk to you, though. Mama said he's got eighteen students participating today, and she said that no good wife of his is going to be no help." I looked at her, a little bemused at how casually she told a total stranger her mom's gossip. Jesus, kids are honest.
Shaking my head, I turned and took in the building she had pointed to. It was a wide, sprawling building with a gabled roof made of dark grey ceramic tiles; its eaves upturned elegantly at the corners. The outside walls were a unique mix of dark wooden panels and pale paper windows, with a wide wooden porch wrapping around the whole thing. The steps led to a large sliding door adorned with beautifully painted cranes, which were open to let in a breeze and ward off the hot, humid day.
A large koi pond, its tranquil waters reflecting the sky, was wrapped around the side of the building, with lilypads and cattails lining the edges swaying gently in the breeze. The bright orange and white fish swam near the surface, occasionally breaching to try and snag the iridescent dragonflies that skimmed the water. A rock garden with a black-and-white peddle path wound around the front of the building. It was peaceful and inviting, with wooden benches and tables sat in a circle around a rather large bonsai tree.
I could feel my little companions' jittery energy rolling off her in thick waves. I turned to her and found the cocoa-brown eyes wide and locked on me. She was bouncing on her toes, lopsided pigtails swinging wildly. "Master Zoro's probably in his office or talking with the contestants. The tournament starts any minute. I begged Mama and Papa to let me go, but they said school was more important and that I was too little to go." She sounded petulant, and her eyes looked at the building with clear longing in her eyes.
Affection filled my chest, and I smiled warmly at her. I kneeled down and put a gentle hand on her shoulder. Suni looked back at me, eyes wide, surprised, I think, by the soft touch. "Thank you so much for bringing me here. I'm going to head in and see if I can find Zoro. Since you are already here and have already skipped school, why don't you head in and watch the tournament?
Her smile got wider and brighter, and a little shriek of excitement slipped out of her. "Really! I can go watch it."
"I don't see why not." It's not like these imaginary parents are ever going to have to discipline her anyway. Suni shrieked again and threw her arms around my shoulders. While holding on, she bounced up and down, repeating, "Thank you, thank you, thank you."
She released me and ran a little ahead of me. She stopped and spun, causing the skirt of her dress to bell around her. "If Zoro is still being a jerk and won't talk to you, come find me, okay? We can sit together and eat popcorn!"
Once she got past the front door, her pink hair disappeared from sight. I shook my head at her antics and started making my way up the path toward the porch. I decided to cut around the side of the building to try and find a side entrance. I really didn't want to draw too much attention and have people delay me any longer. I had to walk through the rock garden to get around the building, and while the stones of the rock garden were beautiful to look at, but were hell on my bare feet. Small cuts and bruises worked their way into my soles with every step, but I just pushed through, knowing they'd be healed once I made my way out.
Taking deep breaths to avoid the pain, I skirted the porch, and as I rounded the corner, I spotted a small wooden door propped open with a rock. A wave of relief washed over me, and I quickened my pace to reach the steps. I practically vaulted the four steps that led to the door. I paused outside it, straining my ears for any sign there was someone on the other side. After several silent moments, I grabbed the edge and gently pulled it open. Thankfully, the hinges were well-oiled and didn't let out any kind of obnoxious speak that would have possibly given me away. The inside of the dojo was hot, and even though the front door was wide open it was doing nothing to cool it down.
It was dim, too. The paper windows diluted the sunlight, and the lamps spaced evenly along the hall were set low so they didn't give off too much heat. The floor was a warm honey-colored wood that felt soothing against my still healing feet. As quietly as I could, I padded down the short hallway. I could hear voices echoing from behind multiple sliding doors lining the corridor. I held my breath until I came to another door at the end of the hall, praying the whole time that no one would come out and question why I was there. The door slid open smoothly and revealed another short hall that opened up into what had to be the main auditorium for the dojo. Several dozen people were already milling around, some having found seats and others clearly dressed to compete. They wore jackets and hakama dyed a deep indigo blue. As I watched, they helped each other put on protective gear, and others were sparing with bamboo swords on the padded bamboo mat, checking their forms in the mirror along one wall.
Given how hot it was, I knew they must be sweltering, but they all looked determined and excited for the tournament to begin. The drone of dozens of people all talking at once, combined with the close heat of the room, caused my anxiety to mount with each passing moment. From the hidden alcove where I stood, I anxiously looked around for something that might tell me where to go next. A row of practice swords and staffs caught my eye. They were lined on a rack near the door and had clearly been shoved out of the way to make room for all the seats and guests of the event. Taking a deep, fortifying breath, I began to quietly tiptoe across the short space between me and the rack.
I tripped over my own feet as I hid behind it and knocked over several wooden staffs that smacked awkwardly onto the soft pads of the training floor. I froze, heart in my throat, as I waited for someone to notice. The fear was palpable as I imagined hands gripping me and ripping me from behind the rack, hard and angry, demanding to know why I was creeping around where I shouldn't be. After a few agonizing minutes of silence, I craned my neck and found the contestants too engrossed in their sparing and the audience too busy watching them, the racket caused by my clumsiness lost in the clatter of wooden swords and shouts of glee.
A flash of pink in my peripheral caught my attention. I turned and found Suni engrossed in a conversation with one of the contestants. She appeared to be interrogating him about his form and having quite a few opinions on what he was doing wrong. The poor kid, who couldn't have been a day over twelve, looked at her completely flustered as she grabbed his bamboo sword and corrected his stance with it. Several other boys and girls around him were chiding him, but he actually appeared to be taking her advice to heart, nodding along with her every word and adjusting his stance as instructed. Clearly, her desire to see the tournament wasn't just because she was a fan.
I smiled fondly at her, and after releasing a heavy breath, I shook my shoulders to rid myself of the tenseness coiled there. After double-checking and triple-checking that no one was looking, I slinked past the rack and through another door on the other side of the auditorium. The low rumble of voices abruptly cut off as I slid the door shut.
I pressed my back to the closed door and took several deep breaths. Sweat began to gather and pour down my neck. This section of the dojo was even hotter and stagnant. There were no open doors or windows to let in what little breeze there was outside. The lights were also brighter; the gas lights' flames turned high, throwing off waves of heat. The hall itself was narrow, with walls so close that if I stood in the middle, I could touch both sides with my arms stretched out. A heated argument broke the still silence of the hall, and a baby's piercing cry echoed off the walls. A baby? Shock and worry tried to take root before I remembered. Oh, Right. Zoro's imaginary baby. The sound of glass shattering blasted through the hall, another sharp cry followed and a hard, angry shout of a man.
More yelling followed, this time a woman's voice, high, furious, and hysterical, reverberated through the room. I moved quickly across the thick padded matting, my steps muffled as I approached the door. It was slid partially open, and the paper in the sliding door ripped in several places, allowing a glimpse into the room beyond. It held the same mat flooring, dark wood, and paper walls. It was clearly set up as some kind of office. Two matching desks lined the far wall; both were stacked high with paperwork that was sitting much too precariously on the edges for my tastes.
There were two people in the room. They were standing at odds with each other. I could only see the woman; she was about five-eight years old, with short navy hair pulled up into a tight bun. She wore fighting gear in a burgundy shade with a white sheathed sword strapped to her hip. She stared at the man across from her with a fierce glare and tight crossed arms. I turned my gaze to the man. His voice cut off as I neared the door, so I missed whatever it was he had said that had pissed her off so much. He was tall, broad, and dressed similar to the pupils of the dojo, though his clothing was a dark forest green. He stood with most of his back to the door, but I could see his arms were holding a small bundle close. Defensive in the face of her wrath. The baby's cries had turned to small babbling whines, no longer loud enough to cover it, parents' heated argument.
The woman's hot angry voice broke the tense silence, "...s'not fair, Zoro. You always promised we'd leave here that we'd be the greatest swordsmen in the world! And now what? You suddenly want to hang around here and teach? You just want to give our dream? For nothing!"
My gaze flashed to the man holding the baby. I don't know why I hadn't realized it was him before, but now it couldn't have been more obvious. Beneath a black bandana wrapped around his head, I could see tufts of his green hair peeking out, three golden earrings clinked together on his left ear, and three swords dangled at his hip. I felt so relieved that I had found him, but it was short-lived. It was clear as day to me that whatever nightmares he had been experiencing while trapped in here had been taking their toll.
This was far from the confident man who'd offered me Marcus's head. His shoulders sloped, and his body language was beaten. He looked nearly broken, and I suddenly felt sick to my stomach at the sight. He tucked the baby closer to his chest, and shot back at the woman in a pleading tone, "No, not nothing, Kuina. Don't you see? We would stay for our son to give him a better future! We'd stay for your father so he could finally retire!" His head tilted down so he could give the child a soft, loving smile.
Kuina let out a dismissive scoff, her burning gaze shifting down to latch onto the child in Zoro's arms. There was real hatred in her eyes as they tracked from the child back up to Zoro. Her voice trembled with the weight of her words. "His future? What about my future? My dreams? I'm just supposed to give all of that up just because I popped out a baby?"
Zoro's head snapped up, clearly taken aback by her scathing tone. "What, no! That's not what this is, Kuina. But we do have a baby now. Koji is only a few weeks old. We can't just drag him across the ocean. Mihawk lives on the Grand Line. It'd be too dangerous. If we wait a few years, maybe once he's a teenager, we can..."
If possible, her face grew even redder and angrier. "Obviously, we wouldn't take it with us. Father can watch it just fine till we get back."
Zoro took a small step back from her and clutched the baby, Koji, closer to his chest. "You want to leave him here? Just abandon him to chase a dream that might take years, if not decades, to accomplish."
Kuina nodded, her eyes shining with determination. "Yes. Can't you imagine it, Zoro? You and me on the open sea. Koji will be just fine here without us. He'll have my father. And Father can..."
"We aren't abandoning our son Kuina! God, do you hear yourself? What kind of mother..." Zoro's voice trailed off, his disbelief palpable in his tone.
"I never wanted to be a mother!" She screeched and paced away to the other side of the room, knocking clutter from the desk in her frustration. "Why do you think I tried to get rid of it!?"
I tensed as I watched her unravel. A manic haze had settled across her face. Her hands dropped to her hips, the fingers on her left hand lightly grazing the hilt of the sword at her hip, raising it over and over and letting the weight of the blade drag it back down. An anxious tick that was growing in frequency the more agitated she became. This version of Zoro didn't seem to realize how much danger he was in as he slowly approached her and placed his free hand gently on her shoulder. This put Koji right near her face, and I watched it screwed up like she had presented her with something disgusting.
"Kuina. You don't mean that. I know this has all been a lot and was very unexpected, but this is a blessing, Kuina. Have you spoken to that doctor Dr. Hana recommended? She was telling me she thinks this might all be part of the post-partum..."
Kuina stumbled back a step and looked up at him with bewildered outrage. "Dr. Hana told you that, huh? That gossipy bitch needs to learn the meaning of confidential." Another frustrated growl left her, and she smacked his hand away. "I don't need that doctor. I don't have post-partum. What I have is rage at having to give up my dreams and wreck my body carrying that brat!"
She brushed past his shoulder, checking him hard enough to send him into a half-spin. It was torture watching utter anguish fill every line of his face. Even with the poison she had shot at him, he still reached for her, this time gently taking hold of her wrist. His mouth opened and closed several times as he searched for the right words to give her. Finally, a resigned look crossed his face, and he said. "Kuina, Love, I would never try to take your dream from you. If you want to go, if you need to go, then go, and we will be here when you get back."
It was clearly exactly the wrong thing to say to her. From my spot behind the door, I watched as pure rage filled every inch of her face, her thin hold on her sanity breaking. The hand that had been fiddling with the hilt of her white sword suddenly gripped tighter, and in one smooth, practiced motion, she ripped it from the sheath and turned toward Zoro.
Horror filled him as he took two giant steps backward, turning his body so that the child was shielded against his body. His hand was still held out in front of him; to ward her off or beseech her to stop wasn't clear. She ignored it, and in one practiced motion, she severed his hand right at the wrist.
A lot happened in the following moments. Kuina seemed to freeze. The anger drained from her momentarily as she realized what she had done. She looked down at the blade in shock. Zoro dropped to his knees, his shock so intense it was almost tangible, as he held his mangled arm up to his face and clutched the baby closer to his chest almost reflexively. He didn't scream, but his usually tan complexion had gone paperwhite, a stark contrast to the blood that was now staining his clothes. Kuina took one step closer to him, her sword held tight in her hand. I may have been mistaken, but it appeared there was an intention to continue what she had started. I couldn't remain silent any longer and finally broke from my trance, slammed the sliding door open, and began to stride into the room.
Her shock at what she had done and at being caught had her just off-kilter enough that I was able to shove her out of the way and kneel in front of Zoro. He was still in shock, his eyes glazed as he stared at his heavily bleeding stump. She smashed into the desk, and her blade clattered softly on the padded floor. She quickly righted herself, and rapid footfalls approached me from behind. The sharp point of the sword touched the back of my shoulder forcefully.
Several heavy breaths came from behind me before she said. "Who the fuck are you?"
I ignored her and focused on trying to force my power into Zoro to slow the bleeding, wishing that just this once, my power would let me regrow the severed limb. It's not real, it's not real, it's not real. I kept the mantra up as his blood soaked into the knees of my pants and dripped off the point of my elbow. "Zoro, honey, come back. It's not real." I pressed harder on his wrist and touched my forehead to his, willing him to wake up. The baby somehow was still asleep in his arms. His face is so strikingly similar to Zoro's that it caused my heart to ache.
Kuina pushed harder on the blade till I felt it rip through my top to the skin of my back, "Did you not hear me bitch? Who the hell are you, and what are you doing here."
I looked up at her over my shoulder, my gaze filled with a potent mix of anger and determination. "I heard you, but seeing as Zoro is bleeding all over the floor, that takes precedence over your hysterics." The tension in the air was palpable, and my snarky tone, though risky with her sword at my back, was a testament to my resolve. Given that she had crippled Zoro, I couldn't bring myself to care about her feelings. I turned my head back to the task at hand.
More harsh breaths, these ones beginning to show a hint of panic. Kuina didn't say anything else to me, but I could hear mumbled ramblings beginning to be muttered under her breath as she continued to press on the blade till it ripped into my skin. It was sinking in so slowly that my body was able to heal around the blade, making the slow slide even more agonizing. I heard Zoro take a deep breath from above me. Even kneeling, he still had a solid six inches on me, so his breath stirred several hairs that had slipped to hang over my face. "Lav...ender." That wretched nickname had never sounded so good. I whipped my head up and found Zoro's blank gaze locked on my face. His brow was furrowed, and his lips moved slowly in what looked like my name.
Joy lit inside me. He was remembering me! "Zoro. Can you hear me?" His head nodded once, and the dark grey of his eyes started to clear. Before he could fully come back, though, I felt a sudden stabbing pain in my back. Stunned, I fell forward into Zoro and half-turned to find Kuina had plunged her sword deep into my shoulder. Her quiet mumbling finally solidified into coherent words, and she said, "I... I can't let you tell." She pushed harder till the point pushed out just under my collarbone. "I'll tell them it was you. Yeah, that'll probably work. You are a drifter who snuck into the dojo. We caught you stealing from the safe. No! Trying to take the baby. Zoro died first, caught off guard when you burst in. The baby next, you killed him when you realized you'd been caught. I cut you down as you ran. I'll be a hero! No one would question my need to leave, to run. Who could blame a woman, a mother, for wanting to leave an island where her family had been murdered?"
Her ramblings were more to herself than me. She had already decided that she was going to kill us all, so what did she care if I heard her. I could not let her kill us. If we died here, the dream would shift to some other nightmare, and who knew if I'd be able to find Zoro again in time. The pain in my shoulder was excruciating but nothing new, so I ignored it as I rested my throbbing temple against Zoro's chest just above the baby. Zoro's stump had stopped bleeding and now rested against my waist, pulling me toward him.
Kuina was still rambling, the words too fast for me to catch; she'd pulled the blade from my shoulder and was now pacing behind us, knocking over those perilous stacks of papers and making the place look like it had been ransacked. My mind spun as I tried to figure out a way out of here. We had to get away from her, and fast. In my ear, a sudden deep rumble surprised me from my musings. "Lavender? What's going on? What are you doing here?" He seemed deeply confused, words slightly slurred from shock and blood loss.
His other arm tightened around the baby, and it let out a sleepy little grunt. In a hushed tone, I whispered, "I... I came to get you. To save you."
He looked down at me and quietly said, "Save me from what? How did you get to Shimotsuki Village? Is Kuina still here?" He must still be in shock, not fully remembering what she did.
I sighed sadly. He was remembering, but not in order. "Zoro, we aren't in a village. This is all an illusion. It's not real. It's only a nightmare." I didn't bring up that Kuina was currently staging the scene for our murder. We'd get there soon, regardless.
He pulled away from me abruptly, my body missing the heat from his immediately. "What do you mean not real?!"
His deep shout brought Kuina's attention back to us. She stopped her ransacking and stomped back toward us, and my body immediately sought the protection of Zoro's arms.
Kuina's sharp voice boomed in my ear, "Zoro! I am so sorry." She threw her arms around his shoulders, knocking me away so that I fell onto my side, causing the still-healing wound in my chest to ache. I let out one grunt of pain. Zoro's eye latched onto me where I lay against the mat. Kuina's arms tightened around him when he went to move toward me. She grabbed where his hand should be and raised it to her eyeline. Confusion was evident in her eyes as she took in the fully healed stump.
"Zoro, I'm so sorry. You know how I am. I just lost my temper. Please forgive me; please don't tell my father." Ah, I thought. She's not sorry she did it; she's just worried she might get in trouble.
He looked at her, then where his hand should be, and then back at her. His face morphed to one of pure rage, and all the love I had seen earlier shining in her direction had drained away. Now, he just looked cold and distant. "Get off me."
She seemed stunned by his words, stumbling back onto her heels as he gave her a gentle but firm shove. She even had the audacity to let a few tears fall down her cheeks as she looked at him. "Zoro, I said I was sorry."
He jerked to his feet. "Sorry! You've permanently maimed me, Kuina! There's no apology great enough to make up for that!" He held his arm out so the stump was thrust right into her face. If I had any idea that she was crazy, this just confirmed it as instead of guilt fluttering across her face, irritation settled in her every feature as if she was annoyed he had brought up the injury at all. Zoro's exclamations woke Koji, and he began to emit quiet, distressed whines that only calmed when Zoro gently began to rock him. It was almost a comical sight, given the death glare settled across his face.
Zoro's attitude toward her and the attentiveness to their so was clearly pissing Kuina off. The apologetic expression slipped from her face and was quickly replaced by bitterness. "That was your fault. You should have known better than to try and grab me when I was in that state."
I'd been trapped with an abuser long enough to recognize the manipulation for what it was. I didn't have enough hands to count the number of times Marcus had tried to make me responsible for my own abuse. Given how beaten down Zoro had looked when I stumbled across them, I was worried that he might fall for the manipulation, but Zoro wasn't having any of it. Maybe it might have worked before she took his hand, but now he saw her for the monster she was. He brushed past her and came to stand next to me, kneeling to help me to my feet. Kuina's eyes zeroed in on me, and hatred like I'd never seen before poured out of her.
"And who's this Zoro? She seemed awfully familiar with you. Is this some whore you've been spending time with while I've been raising your brat and watching over the dojo?" Classic deflection. Bitch.
Zoro's eyes bugged. "Kuina," his tone was patronizing. "You have not been raising Koji or doing any of the dojo responsibilities, and you know it. I do that. When, during the almost twenty-four hours a day I spend in this building, with your father and dozens of students, would I have time to have an affair?"
Her face flushed red, and she gawped momentarily at Zoro's frank words about her lack of duty. Her anger burned brighter, so hot it was almost like an open flame. It was easier to believe Zoro was having an affair than to see that the problem was with her. Never mind that Zoro was too honorable to cheat on someone like that. In her mind, this was no longer about her actions but an imagined slight against her, which was an insult too far.
She had taken one step toward us, violence in her every movement, but before she could say or do anything, a loud gasp came from the doorway. I swiveled toward the door and saw Suni's wide brown eyes, filled with a fear so palpable it sent shivers down my spine, locked on the blood surrounding us.
Her terrified eyes flashed to me, and mine swung to Kuina. Her eyes were blank. She slowly walked over to where she had dropped her sword and gripped it tightly. The intent in her eyes was frightening, and I felt paralyzed by the look. It reminded me of how Marcus would look at me when he decided to punish me—hard and sinister and full of promised malice. I stayed frozen until Kuina finally took a step toward the door. Toward Suni.
I jerked in Zoro's arm, swung my head toward Suni, and screamed, "Run!"
She didn't hesitate, taking off like a frightened rabbit down the hall, pink pigtails flying behind her as she bolted. Kuina took off after her, stopping in the doorway long enough to give us look that promised extreme violence before flying out the door. I watched her go, my heart in my throat, torn between the urge to follow and the knowledge that we didn't have much time left. As much as I wanted to protect little Suni, I knew it wouldn't matter in the end. My throat closed up as tears choked me and poured down my cheeks. My mind constantly chanted that this wasn't real over and over. However, that didn't stop the tears from flowing.
"Kuina! Get back here!"
Zoro's voice echoed off the walls around us. Unlike me, he had stumbled halfway to the door already. I became afraid that if he left my line of sight, I would lose him forever. I reached out and grabbed the tail of his jacket, pulling him to a stumbling stop.
He turned toward me, fire in his eyes. "What are you doing? We have to go after them." He pulled hard on his jacket to dislodge my grip, but I kept hold.
"Zoro, please just think," I urged, my voice tinged with determination, "this isn't real. How do you know me? How would you know my name if you've never left this island."
He looked at me, his eyes a mix of anger and confusion. "Wendi told me your name," he said, his voice uncertain.
His mention of Wendi was a jolt, but I didn't let it distract me. "Right. But where did you meet Wendi?" I pressed on, my voice unwavering.
His mouth opened, an answer on the tip of his tongue. But he hesitated, the response clearly not making any sense given what this dream had him believing about his life. "We met in a dungeon," he paused, confused."But wait not that can't be. I've never been in a dungeon; there aren't any castles here. How did I..."
He broke off his question and fussed with the baby in his arms to distract himself. The baby was getting fussier, probably feeling the anxiety wafting off his father. I hated to interrupt, but I needed to get him to understand. With a heavy sigh, I put my hand on his shoulder and said, "I'm so sorry, Zoro, but we have to leave here. This isn't real. Not the island, the dojo. Not Suni, not Kuina, not K..Koji. None of it. Please remember. Fredric's fear-fog swallowed you up. This is all just an illusion."
He shook off my hand and took a step back from me. "What the hell does that even mean? Kuina's real! I grew up with her and trained with her. I loved her." His voice hesitated on the word "love." If Kuina is based on someone real, whatever love Fredric polluted with this dream wasn't of the romantic kind.
"That may be, but this," I swept my arm around us, "is a perversion of that. You left Zoro. Remember. You left and joined the Starwhats. Luffy, Nami, Sanji. Remember them. They are your crew, your family, and they are in trouble. Please! We need you to wake up." My eyes were beseeching as I pleaded with him.
Zoro began making little shooshing sounds to soothe Koji's fussing and possibly to help with his own anxiety as well. "Koji is real." His voice trembled, uncertainty in every syllable. His body shook with tension; his desire to be right was palpable. He held Koji out and raked his eyes over every inch of him. From the frantic eye movement, I could tell that he was only seeing what the dream wanted him to see and not the truth of things. Sympathy for him filled every inch of me. Slowly, I walked closer and gently placed my hand on Koji's back. It was warm, and his tiny breaths moved gently under my palm. Zoro let me touch him, and when I looked up at him, his eyes were now swimming with tears.
"You feel him. You feel his breaths, his heartbeats. How can you say he's not real? He must be real." His voice, barely audible, was filled with uncertainty. I carefully pried Koji from Zoro's arms. I thought he'd stop me, but he only held his hand on the infant for as long as possible. As I cradled Koji, Zoro's gaze followed us to the cozy bassinet in the corner. I laid Koji down, and he snuggled into the soft mattress, emitting a sleepy coo as he fell asleep.
I watched him sleep, sadness welling in my gut at having to take something so precious away from Zoro. When I turned, I found him directly behind me, barely a breath away. He looked at me morosely, but his eyes were bright, an alertness now settled in them that had been missing since I'd found him.
"Luffy, Nami, Sanji. I remember. But," his gaze locked on the baby, "I remember him too. I remember his birth, Kuina being pregnant with him, hell, all the moments that led to now. How can that be and still not be real?"
"It's like any dream. They feel real while you are in them, but if you focus closely, you can find the inconsistencies." To make my point, I gently pulled Koji's hand from where it sat curling against his chest. I held it out for Zoro to see. He peaked over the bassinet and lurched back in horror as he took in the malformed hand with its missing fingers. "What happened to his hand?"
I placed Koji's hand back and turned back to Zoro. "In dreams, it can be hard to tell reality for dreaming from within these fearscapes, but one way to tell is to count things or try to read. Koji only has three fingers on his hand; that clock above the door doesn't have numbers but squiggles; none of these open notebooks on the desk have real words, just unintelligible ramblings, and images. You've never noticed because you were a part of the dream. You see it now because you are waking up."
Gasps and screams burst into the room. They were coming from the auditorium down the hall. I can only guess that dream-Kuina had caught up to Suni. My feet twitched, a deep yearning to run to Suni's rescue, burning a hole in my chest. I was able to push it aside, but just barely. I felt a fat tear drip down my cheek, and a sob choked in my throat as I fought to keep more at bay. Taking a deep breath I tuned out the scream-bait and continued to hold Zoro's gaze; the same helpless agony I felt was plastered across his face. I could see his body vibrating with tension as he fought to keep from bolting from the room. Briefly, he looked down at the baby and then at me. His eyes were finally clear, the haze lifted.
He brushed past me and stared down into the bassinet. The longer I looked, the less like a real infant Koji looked. Yes, the side facing us was still fully formed, but the part of his face lying on the mattress was hazy and malformed. Zoro must have been able to see it, too, but he still smiled softly at the baby, lightly reaching out to stroke his cheek. Having resolved some inner turmoil, he nodded to himself and leaned down to gently kiss Koji's forehead. "Goodbye, Little One. I'll never forget you."
My chest tightened at the words. This reality may be false, but the emotions and memories were very real. I wanted desperately to go to him. Try and soothe the hurt he was experiencing, but it felt wrong to intrude on his last moment with his son. So instead, I just had to watch his heart break. His face was a mask of conflicting emotions. He allowed himself a few moments to feel the pain, and then he roughly scrubbed his face with his hands, bandishing tears that had never fallen. Then, he pulled himself together and stepped away from the bassinet. His steps were heavy as he forced his feet forward one step at a time. He turned back to me and took my hand tightly in his. We looked at each other as the nightmare played out in the auditorium.
He looked toward the door and then back at me. His eyes were filled with a mix of fear and determination. "I remember now. The throne room, finding Nami, that bastard Marcus, an eerie black cloud barreling toward you, throwing myself in front to protect you." He pulled me closer so he could tuck me under his chin. "I remember you smelled like daisies."
My heart tripped over itself. I gripped his jacket, holding him as close as possible. "Luffy, Sanji, and Robin are out there now. They bust into the room not long after the fog swallowed you up. We have to get out of here before Fredric decides to kill you and uses the fear fog against anyone else." I felt his chin move as he nodded. I also felt when he looked toward the door as another scream hit his ears.
"How can we just leave? How can we not go out there and stop this?" His voice rumbled across the top of my head, shaking ever so slightly. I could feel his anguish and his need to prevent the impending disaster.
I sighed heavily. "I can only assume that had I not shown up, that's exactly what would have happened. You and Kuina would still have fought; she still would have harmed you. That little girl still would have witnessed it and run. Kuina would have chased her, you would have chased Kuina, and the carnage in the auditorium would have been the final horror needed to break your mind forever." A heavy sigh burst from me, weary and exhausted. "We leave because as awful as this is, it's not real. We have to get back to protect what is."
More screams echoed down the hall, several even shouting his name. He flinched with every one, his grip on me tightening as he fought to keep himself still. Finally, he took a deep breath and looked at me. "How do we get outta here?"
An inappropriate laugh slipped from me, surprising us both. He pulled away slightly and looked down at me with a raised brow. "Um, well, I'm not one hundred percent sure. I've never dream-walked before. But I remember my mother once saying that you have to visualize a door to where your physical body is located. So I guess I just have to imagine the throne room."
He pulled me closer. "Should we both, or does it only work for you?"
"It couldn't hurt."
Silence descended as I closed my eyes and imagined the throne room. I knew every nook and cranny. Hundreds of memories flashed through my mind. My father and mother sat among commoners and nobility alike as they discussed the goings on of the kingdom. The night they were murdered, Celia ripped from my arms. The dozens of nights spent in there with Marcus. And finally, this night, the last night. Nami, Celia, Zoro, Sanij, Al. The hope I felt for the first time in over a decade as they offered me what I had wanted so badly for years. Freedom.
A loud whoosh and blast of cold air came from my left. When I opened my eyes, the same dense fog Fredric released was spiraling in a six-foot-tall, four-foot-wide oval. Unbridled joy filled me. I did it! Mama would be so proud! Zoro gasped, and when I looked up at him, he wasn't looking at the portal but to the right at the door.
Following his gaze, I was struck by the horror standing in the frame. Leaning heavily against the sliding door stood Kuina, covered head to toe in blood. Her face was twisted up with murderous glee, her sword dangled at her waster, dripping blood and viscera onto the jute matting at her feet. I finally noticed that the air was still; the screaming had stopped, and silence hung heavy in the air.
"Zoro~," her bright, singsongy voice said as she swanned into the room. It's okay now. There's no one left to stop us." Her eyes snapped to me. Well, almost no one."
Chills ran up my spine as she continued toward us. Zoro started to edge us backward toward the portal. "Kuina, what have you done?"
His whispered question must not have reached Kuina as she didn't bother to give him a response. She just continued to make shuffling, swaying steps into the room, leaving a blood footprint in her wake. Mutterings rang out from her. "Dead~, dead~, dead~! All dead, all gone. No more students, no more parents, not more Father. Just a few more loose ends, and there won't be anything left the trap me on this fucking island." Her ravings continued like that on a loop, words slurring together, and her form began to lose its shape.
Zoro and I watched on in horror as the stability of Kuina's form started to deteriorate. Her face was now longer and sharper, and her limbs were disproportionate to her body. Her lips pulled up into a wide smile with sharp teeth. Her hair had fallen from its bun and now fell in lank hunks near her chin; her skin had turned a mottled grey. Her voice took on an echoey snake-like tone.
"Zoro, dear, bring the whore to me. I can get rid of her, and then there'd be nothing to stop us from setting sail to fulfill our dream~." A spindly hand reached out toward me; a single finger beckoned me closer. Zoro's arm around my waist tightened, pushing me back a step away from her. I could feel the cold humidity of the portal at my back. Kuina had edged closer to us. Occasionally swaying and flinging the sword in her hands in wide arcs, the sharp edge coming within a hairsbreadth from my face.
I reached behind me, the swirling fog sucking at my fingers, practically begging me to step inside. I tightened my hand on Zoro's waist and began tugging him through. I'd just set my foot inside the whirlpool when a cry echoed from the bassinet. Kuina froze. Her face stretched to horrific sinister proportions as she turned toward it. "Zoro~. Come help me~. Our sweet baby boy is crying~."
I felt Zoro tense back up. He whipped around and had even taken a step away from me, away from freedom, before my grip on him ground him to a halt. He looked down at me, helpless. I pulled him back and hugged him tightly. "I know this is hard. I'd bring him with us if I could, but we can't. He's not real." I edged backward another step, disappearing from the calf down. "Please trust me that this will work."
Tears ran down my hands. The baby's wails became screams, and a sudden crunching sound filled the room. Zoro tried to turn his head, but I held him firm and pulled him another step with me. My waist and his left foot were fully engulfed when a monstrous shriek echoed through the room. "Zoro!"
A skittering noise rushed toward us and latched onto Zoro's jacket, ripping into it until it hit the skin of his back, latching on with sharp, pointed fingers. Zoro screamed, and the monster that was once Kuina began to try to pull him back out of the portal. I looked over his shoulder and into white, blank eyes. The fearscape was panicking. In reality, Fredric must be in trouble for the details here to be unraveling so wholly.
The room had practically melted, warped beyond recognition. Zoro's grip on me was tight; all of his considerable strength needed to keep himself from being pulled away from me. "Goddamit! Let the fuck go!" His voice was rough with anger. He yanked and pulled from her grip.
He managed to regain another step, pushing me farther into the portal, but the monster's face suddenly appeared over his shoulder, jaw nearly unhinged. As I looked on in terror, she chomped down onto Zoro's shoulder and began to shake her head like she was trying to tear a piece of him off. Another step back, and I was now into the portal up to my chest, but Zoro was still barely in, only his feet within its threshold. I feared that if I went in without him, the portal might close, and he may be left behind.
Zoro's grunts of pain and the monsters' grunts and growls filled my head. Thinking was becoming hard to do over the panic. Looking around the near-black room, I slid my hand down Zoro's side to get a better grip, and my hand bumped against the hilts of his swords. An idea lit inside me, and I gripped the sword tightly. Pulling it out took considerable effort. The thing was heavier than I had been anticipating.
Once I had it freed, I knew I had to let him go. "Zoro." He looked at him, eyes wide with panic and pain. "I need you to hold on to me as tightly as possible. OK? I have an idea to get us out of this."
The monster gave her head a violent shake, drawing a cry from him that ripped at my heart. But he still struggled to lift his head and nodded bravely. His grip on my upper arm tightened nearly painfully. Once I knew he wasn't going to let go, I lifted the sword and aimed the point at the one blank eye I could make out. My arms shook, my muscles weak from years of lack of use.
The white orbs that replaced her eyes rolled toward me and stared at me with the same malice Fredric had before I'd entered this fearscape. Even his subconscious hates me.
A scream exploded out of me, all the hate I'd held for so long at Fredric pouring into the thrust, and I sunk the blade into the monster's skull. It screamed like a banshee and reared back, releasing Zoro so that it could clutch at its head. Taking advantage of her distraction, I grabbed Zoro's jacket and pulled. I fell backward into the portal, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and holding him close to me, ensuring he came through at the same time. Zoro's arms wrapped around me as we fell as if to protect me from the landing that never came.
The office fell away, the monster shrieks followed us for a moment, and then silence. As we continued to fall and silence surrounded us, Zoro's shoulder began to shake, and wetness pooled at the base of my neck. There wasn't anything I could do until we reached the end of the portal. So while we waited, I just held him, stoking my hand across the nape of his neck in soothing motions, offering as much comfort as I could. "It's ok. It's over. I've got you."
His tears didn't stop, but he did let out a sigh of relief, and the tension left his body. We clung to each other as we fell through the fog.
I did it. We're out. Hold on Celia, Nami, Sanji. We are coming.
A/N: Finally done. May have gotten away from me a bit, but I'm pretty happy with the final result.
Have a great holiday! -CL