It was late, past Asuka's bed time (not that Mama was likely to punish her, or even notice—shut up shut up!), when she at last managed to pin Kaworu down for interrogation. Obviously they couldn't talk freely in front of their classmates, and Asuka somehow hadn't felt comfortable even in front of Shinji when they delivered the Ramiel. Kaworu had then spent all evening evading, deflecting, and generally being an unhelpful schweinhundt, but she eventually cornered him on the balcony.

"Ah-hah! Gotcha!" He'll have to jump over the railing to escape now!

Annoyingly, Kaworu didn't immediately break down in repentant confession. Staring at the moon – his favourite hobby – and twisting something in his fingers, he took a full second to blink and turn slowly to face her. "Hm?"

Asuka folded her arms. "Enough bullshit. You need to talk."

"I do? What about?"

"What do you think, idiot?" She crossed over to jab him in the chest – not too hard, since he was sitting on the rail with one leg dangling out into space, but hard enough. "About that giant thing in the cave, the Lilith!"

"Oh, them. They aren't an Angel."

"I figured that, since we didn't collect it, and also it's freaking huge! So what actually is it?"

"Lilith is Lilith."

"And a punch to the face is a punch to the face. Answer the question properly!"

Kaworu looked at the moon again as though for inspiration, than down at the thing in his hands. Despite herself, Asuka peered at it too – a black braided leather cuff studded with tiny jewels the same shade of red as his eyes.

She knew already, but said it out loud anyway. "That's from Shinji, isn't it."

Kaworu nodded.

"Geez. That guy has no middle gears at all – hasn't he ever heard of taking it slow?"

She frowned and leaned in to better stare at Kaworu's face.

"...You don't look happy about it. Don't try and pretend you don't like him that way too, I've got eyes in my head."

Kaworu's voice was quiet. "I should give it back."

Asuka winced. "Okay, I know I said 'no middle gears', but do you really need to slam on the brakes that hard?"

"It would be unkind to encourage a temporary attachment, when humans—people are so sad to say goodbye."

"Huh?" said Asuka elegantly. "Temporary? Goodbye? You're not going anywhere – are you?"

"Ah. Um. Well, in case I get transferred again, you know? Uncle Keel's work takes him to many places, after all."

Asuka huffed. "Well, we'll burn that bridge when we get to it."

Kaworu's brow furrowed. "Is that how the saying goes?"

"Point is!" She jabbed him in the chest again. "That's no way to be! Fatalism is a self-fulfilling sabotage – just because something might end is no reason not to go for it. Things aren't less worth having just because they're not infinite or perfect or whatever. A life half-lived is no life at all!"

Kaworu's eyes were wide as he drank in her words. He swallowed.

Asuka's voice softened. "And it's not fair to Shinji to be like that, either. When did he ever demand forever from you, huh?"

Kaworu shook his head. "He didn't ask anything of me," he said softly, "just to hear his feelings." The affection on his face glowed at least as bright as the moon shining on him.

Asuka put a hand gently on his shoulder. "If you really want Shinji to not be sad..."

Kaworu looked up hopefully.

"...you can explain that Lilith thing to me, so I don't kill you."

He 'urk'ed.

"Now, schweinhundt!"

"Ouch! All right! All right."

Asuka let go of him and folded her arms expectantly.

Kaworu took a deep breath. "Lilith is the avatar of this planet's life."

"Huh? Avatar?"

"You've heard of the primordial soup?"

"Uh, I think so?" Asuka searched in her memory – like most obscure bits of knowledge, the corresponding audio file was in Rei's voice. "A theorised grouping of amino acids, charged and energised by some external input, such as a strike of lightning, to assemble into self-replicating chains of organic chemistry – the 'building blocks of life'." "That's, like, impossible to prove, though, right?"

"As consciousness may be considered an emergent property of sentient neurological complexity, Lilith is the emergent embodiment of the evolution of Earth lifeforms – their midwife and mirror, companion and witness. Lilith is you, and every human, and all animals, plants, viruses, in all the kingdoms of life."

Asuke felt dizzy. The Lilith had looked at her, and recognised her. Welcomed her. "And it's just – hanging out? In that cave, just down there?"

"For now. Life is everywhere on this planet, so Lilith goes everywhere."

"I – I..." She rubbed her temples. "This makes no sense. It's insane, you realise that, right? The Lilith would have to be, like, three billion years old! Nothing lives that long! Entropy, decay, energy loss—"

"Energy is never lost, only transformed." Kaworu had no right to look so calm about this. (And Rei's lectures sound much cooler than his do, so there!)

"Same difference! As far as we're concerned, anyway!" She shoved at his shoulder again, forgetting he was half-over the balcony rail, but somehow he kept his balance. "And how do you know all this, anyway? If it's true—"

"It is."

"IF it is, it's a scientific revolution! And you're just waving 'hi' while you're down there collecting your little cryptid. Where are you getting all this stuff from?"

Kaworu tucked his hands into his pockets and hummed nonchalantly. "Some of it is from my uncle's work. Some is … some is just a feeling I have."

"'Just a feeling'," she snorted. "Like you 'just feel' like checking when an Angel's nearby."

"Yes, like that."

"That's not an answer!"

"It's the only answer I have. I'm sorry, Asuka," he said, suddenly serious. "You've helped me so much since I came here. I wish I had something better for you."

Asuka scowled. "Sure, whatever. I mean, it's such a novelty to get anything out of you."

He smiled serenely. "My pleasure, to provide entertainment."

She rolled her eyes. "And you're still full of it. I don't know why I bother."

"Because you enjoy the melodious sound of my voice?" he suggested, and Asuka wheezed.

"You're not Rei." She bit her lip. Oop – that was a bit...

Kaworu's smile had gone mischievous. "Of course, how could I ever compare to the wonderful Miss Rei?"

"Shut up." Asuka felt her face heating.

"Have you sent her all your selfos yet?"

"Selfies! And they weren't all selfies anyway!"

"No more than ninety percent, I'm sure."

"Shut up! I'll tip you off the damn balcony!"

Kaworu shrugged. "We are only five floors up, hardly a fatal distance."

"You think you're so funny."

"Funny? We are on the fifth floor, yes?" For such a bullshit artist, he did a good line in 'genuinely clueless', Asuka had to admit.

"I've had enough of you," she declared, and spun away.

Behind her she heard Kaworu muttering, "So five floors is dangerous – I must remember that."

Tch. Weirdo.

Alone in her room, Asuka closed the door and leant against it, head and heart both whirling. All this crazy stuff happening, primordial avatars and screaming geometry, and she just wanted to talk with Rei. Just – to look into those calm and calming eyes, to know she would be heard, and in turn to hear whatever the other girl thought, or felt, however trivial or unrelated. She didn't need Rei to solve anything, or manage or fix or whatever. She just needed Rei to – to be Rei.

"I just want us to be us," she whispered. "No schemes, no plans, no agendas – just … us."

Hurry up, Shinji. I miss her.