This chapter explains explicit sexual content (and so does the next chapter) so please be aware of that before reading if this is not something that interests you.
As Amanda's hand continues its slow descent into Olivia's flannel pajama bottoms, she carefully observes the other woman's facial expressions and body language, wanting to be completely sure that Olivia is comfortable with what is happening between them. The brunette's head is thrust back against her shoulder, giving Amanda a glimpse of parted lips and a puckered brow and eyelids that are squeezed tightly shut as Olivia's taller figure arches slightly into her own with the languid movement of her palm. The only sound in the room is Olivia's ragged breathing and Amanda's soft panting as her fingertips make contact with the delicate cotton waistband of the lieutenant's underwear, drifting leisurely back and forth along the material and causing Olivia to buck hard into her body in response.
"Getting a little impatient, are we?" Amanda teases lightly, pressing another kiss to the side of Olivia's neck while her fingertips dance gradually lower.
She knows that time is of the essence here; that not only are they in danger of the kids waking up at any second from their impromptu nap, but she has also been dying to touch Olivia in this way for as long as she can remember. Despite these very good reasons for speeding up the process, Amanda still can't resist dragging it out just a little bit longer; wanting to savor this moment between them, especially when she hears the breathy moan escape from Olivia's mouth as she moves her hand lower again and cups the older woman gently through her panties.
"Amanda."
A flood of moisture is pasting her own underwear to her body as she listens to her name being drawn out in a groan of passion from Olivia's lips and feels the unbelievable amount of wetness currently soaking through the thin material that is the only barrier between her hand and Olivia's skin. "Oh my god, Liv," she whispers with a throaty moan of her own, tracing a fingernail delicately over the drenched cotton as her rapidly heightening arousal spikes to an even greater degree.
Amanda rubs Olivia softly through her panties, still incredulous that this is really happening, as it seems more like some kind of erotic dream sequence; an unattainable fantasy instead of actual reality. Her eyebrows pull together in a concerned frown when she notices that Olivia's legs are buckling slightly beneath her as she continues to draw a fingertip in ever-narrowing circles around the sodden garment, her stomach muscles clenching tightly when she makes contact with the brunette's clit through the material.
"Liv, honey, let's go over to the bed so we can lie down," Amanda whispers into her ear, giving a quiet chuckle before placing a soothing kiss to the side of her neck. "You seem to have a disconcerting habit of going weak in the knees when you're around me. I think we should try to avoid another near-collapse onto the floor."
"No, I can't-" Olivia gasps out, seeming to lose the power of speech for several seconds before finding her voice again. "I can't wait that long."
"You can't wait long enough to walk a few feet over to the bed?" Amanda replies in amusement, although the growing amount of wetness underneath her palm as she continues to circle the swollen nub with her fingertip is making it obvious that Olivia is not exaggerating.
"No," the older woman responds in a breathy whimper and Amanda smiles as she trails her other hand up Olivia's sweatshirt and gently cups a generous breast through her top, letting her thumb graze back and forth across an erect nipple.
"Okay, Liv," Amanda snickers softly, overcome with a mixture of lust and tenderness when she hears the quick intake of air and feels the other woman arching against her body again.
She is aware of Olivia clutching onto her arm with desperate, clumsy fingers in an effort to move Amanda's hand out of her pajama pants, and she peers over Olivia's shoulder once more to get another look at her pinched features and flushed cheeks. "Sorry, honey, do you want me to stop?" she asks softly as that concern cuts through her arousal again, very conscious of not making Olivia feel uncomfortable in any way.
"No, I want..."
"What?" Amanda prods gently as Olivia's fingers tangle with her own and their conjoined hands come to a halt at the waistband of the taller woman's underwear. "Tell me what you want, Liv."
While the lieutenant is usually so assertive and dominant at the precinct, this is a whole other side of Olivia and one that Amanda feels privileged to see when they are alone; the uncertain and endearing aspects of her personality causing her to mold the brunette more securely into her own body in a somewhat protective fashion. She is pretty sure that she knows what Olivia is trying to say as her friend's hand is trembling against her own now, Olivia's curvy figure shuddering hard in Amanda's embrace, but she needs to hear the words pass through her lips before going any further, her fingers twitching minutely against soft cotton as she waits patiently.
"I want you to go inside," Olivia murmurs huskily, Amanda watching as the older woman turns her head so their mouths are hovering mere inches apart. "I want to feel your hands on my skin."
"Okay," Amanda whispers in a voice that is choked with need and desire, inclining her head the barest amount so her lips are grazing over Olivia's for the first time ever, the tentative kiss instantly deepening as her fingers breach the barrier of the other woman's panties and slip slowly beneath the waistband.
She opens her mouth and lets her tongue brush lightly against Olivia's, swallowing the brunette's loud moan as her hand makes contact with the damp curls and heated skin between the older woman's legs. Amanda rests her hand tenderly on Olivia's pubic hair for a moment, letting her friend get used to her touch while her heart hammers wildly inside her chest at finally being able to be so intimate with the woman she loves.
"Lower," Olivia rasps out amid kisses that are growing more passionate with each passing second, Amanda not wasting any more time as she grants Olivia's request and slides her fingers into soaking wet folds.
They both groan simultaneously at the deliciously new and incredible feeling of the skin to skin contact as Amanda's other hand glides underneath the hem of Olivia's sweatshirt, gently massaging a soft breast that feels like satin to the touch, her thumb pressing down upon a swiftly hardening nipple. Her fingertips are tracing delicate patterns along the protruding bundle of nerves at the juncture of Olivia's thighs, moving the tiny bud back and forth in swirling figure eights as Olivia's rapidly growing wetness creates erotic noises that fill the air and mingle with the muffled sounds of panting and moaning.
"Fuck," Olivia gasps into Amanda's mouth as her knees buckle a little further, Amanda doing her best to tighten her hold around the squirming form of the taller woman and keep her upright. "Harder."
"You're pretty demanding, you know that, Liv?" she teases in a husky tone, but obliges her right away by kneading a voluptuous breast with a firmer touch and sinking one finger very slowly into the velvet heat between Olivia's legs.
She is rewarded by a strangled moan that works its way out of Olivia's mouth, the older woman murmuring her name repeatedly in between fervent kisses, and Amanda thinks she might explode right then and there just from the sheer amount of pleasure she seems to be bringing to Olivia, her panties sticking right to her soaked skin. She slips another finger inside the tight, wet warmth of her friend's shuddering body, picking up the pace as her thumb swipes intermittently over her clitoris before pressing down more firmly and circling it with a steady touch.
Olivia instantly goes stiff in her embrace with a ragged gasp of air, the other woman's head slamming back against her shoulder and their lips wrenching apart as she lets out a long cry that Amanda immediately tries to stifle by covering Olivia's mouth with her own once more. They kiss frantically while Olivia bucks hard into her smaller frame, her slick walls fluttering around Amanda's fingers and spasming over and over again before the lieutenant goes slack in her arms, Amanda gently removing her hand from inside of Olivia's sweatshirt and easing her fingers free from the dripping, confined passage.
Before they even have a chance to catch their breaths or utter a single word, a childish wail pierces the air, followed by a loud bark and the clicking of canine toenails across the floor, and Amanda and Olivia are yanking themselves away from each other so quickly that they practically lose their balance and stumble over one another's feet.
"Fuck me," Olivia mutters in exasperation under her breath as she hastily smooths her clothing back into place and drags her hands through disheveled hair, Amanda quirking an amused eyebrow at her in response.
"I think I just did," she smirks with a cheeky grin, keeping an ear cocked for the sound of little footsteps in the hallway as her eyes rake up and down Olivia's trembling body with an arousal that needs to start abating as fast as possible. "I'll go check on the kids and Frannie while you take a minute alone in here, okay, honey?"
Olivia simply nods in response as words seem to have failed her for the time being, brown eyes locking intensely onto blue as Amanda forces herself to turn away and head to the bedroom door, even though she wants nothing more than throw herself back into the other woman's arms and pick up right where they had left off.
After a quick and easy dinner of grilled cheese and tomato soup, the five occupants of the apartment are gathered in the living room once again for a movie night; the kids in their pajamas with stacks of pillows and blankets to maximize their comfort. Amanda has made a little nest on the floor for Noah and Jesse and Frannie to curl up in together while they watch a children's film and munch on a giant bowl of popcorn, the kids occasionally tossing the kernels at one another or sneaking them to the dog when they think their mothers aren't paying attention.
She and Olivia have taken over the entire couch, Amanda sitting at one end with Olivia's feet in her lap as the older woman stretches out across the remaining cushions and enjoys the massage that Amanda is lavishing upon her lower extremities, working her hands around a tight calf muscle underneath the blanket they are sharing. They have not had a chance to discuss what had taken place between them in the bedroom a few hours prior, as the kids have been their top priority since awakening from their brief snooze and they have been busy entertaining everyone and trying to keep them out of trouble.
The short nap that Noah and Jesse had taken before dinner seems to have energized them even more instead of mellowing them out for the evening, Amanda looking on with a mixture of annoyance and amusement as each child takes a turn letting the other smack them in the face with a pillow before bursting into hysterical laughter.
"You know, Liv, I think there might be something seriously wrong with our children," Amanda remarks dryly, raising an eyebrow and shaking her head in consternation as she watches the shenanigans play out before her.
She hears Olivia snort in response and glances over to see a roll of her big brown eyes before the older woman is lifting her head off the pillow she is lying on and fixing the kids with a stern expression. "Okay, guys, can we cool it with the pillow fighting before somebody gets hurt?" she calls out in a tone that suggests there is absolutely no room for argument despite voicing her command as a question. "Noah, stop hitting your sister right now, please."
Amanda immediately freezes in her seat at the term 'sister', her limbs molded into the cushions and her heart feeling like it has come to a complete halt inside her chest, throwing another cautious glance at Olivia to see that all color has drained from the other woman's face as she seems to register what she has just said. She notices with a mixture of relief and disappointment that Noah doesn't appear to be listening to a word his mother says, as both kids are still very engaged in their pillow fight and have now gotten Frannie all riled up with excitement, the little boy not reacting at all to Olivia's order.
Amanda is unable to tear her gaze away from Olivia's face and waits until the brunette is looking straight at her before speaking, those dark eyes as wide as she has ever seen them, panic and regret rippling plainly over Olivia's sheet-white features. "Liv, it's okay," she whispers gently, reaching out to lay a tender hand on the other woman's forearm and intending on calming her down before Olivia completely overacts and decides to do something ridiculous again, like packing up and going home.
"I, uh, I didn't meant to say that," the lieutenant stutters quietly, seemingly trying to get ahold of herself and fix her mistake. "I wasn't thinking. It just slipped out."
"It's okay," Amanda repeats softly, tangling her fingers with Olivia's and giving them a soothing squeeze as the brunette struggles into an upright position on the couch. "The kids are so hyper, I don't think they even heard you."
Her heart feels as if it has started up an uneven rhythm of barely concealed joy as she tries to stop herself from going down that uncertain road again; from entertaining the thought of what it would be like if Noah and Jesse were actually siblings. Amanda has spent far too much time wishing and hoping for this to be true, and even though she and Olivia had taken a giant step together that day, she still doesn't know what the status of their relationship can be classified as, since they have yet to engage in a serious conversation on the topic.
She does know that it is definitely time to sit down and discuss everything that has been going on between them lately, but remembers that she had resolved not to keep pushing on the subject while Olivia is still recovering. It's hard to start up any kind of dialogue on the situation with the kids wide awake and sprinting and jumping around the room, using the pillows and blankets as an obstacle course now as Frannie trails after them while emitting frantic barks, but she doesn't know how much longer they can go without addressing the subject head-on.
Amanda feels Olivia's fingers slacken in her grip and when she looks over at the other woman again, she spots an expression on her face that she is all too familiar with, quickly shuffling over on the cushions so they are sitting shoulder to shoulder and hip to hip. "Liv, you don't need to get all worked up about what you just said," she warns in a low tone as she tightens her hold around Olivia's hand. "I know it was just a slip of the tongue and you didn't mean to say it. And to be perfectly honest, I didn't really mind at all. I like the sound of it."
When Olivia's gaze meets her own, Amanda swallows hard at the myriad of untold emotions that are visible in those chocolate orbs, her mind flashing back to the intimate scene they had shared in her bedroom earlier. She licks her lips before she can stop herself, her stomach muscles clenching tightly when she notices Olivia's eyes following the movement of her tongue around her mouth, and she hastily puts a stop to an action that has become somewhat sensuous when that hadn't been her intention.
"You like the sound of it?" Olivia asks in a whispered tone that is ringing with hesitation and Amanda nods firmly as brown eyes bore into blue, shifting impossibly closer on the couch and easing a comforting arm around Olivia's shoulders.
"Yes, I do," she confirms softly, her fingers tracing soothing patterns along the material of the older woman's sweatshirt. "I like it a lot. It sounds right to me; Jesse being Noah's sister."
"Hmm." Olivia doesn't say anything else after exhaling with the thoughtful noise but she does lean her head onto Amanda's shoulder, causing a relieved smile to stretch across her lips.
They sit there contentedly together for a few minutes, watching the kids work themselves into an absolute frenzy of wild shrieking and crazy laughter and airborne pillows, until Amanda figures it is time to put a stop to the horseplay and try to get them tucked into bed for the night before her neighbors decide to file a noise complaint against her. She reluctantly pulls herself away from Olivia's warm body and presses down gently on her shoulders when the brunette begins getting to her feet at the same time, murmuring in protest at her actions.
"No, you just stay right there and relax, Liv," Amanda chastises quietly, smoothing a hand over thick dark locks and pushing Olivia back onto the cushions. "Let me handle the little monsters tonight, okay? I know you're not feeling a hundred percent better yet, and you had a somewhat...vigorous...afternoon, so it's probably best if you don't overexert yourself again."
A saucy grin is pulling at the corners of her lips as she watches the hot flush of color spread across Olivia's face, immensely enjoying her ability to make the other woman blush each time she so much as mentions anything even remotely romantic. Amanda doesn't think she will ever get sick of this sweet and adorable side of Olivia's normally tough and kick-ass personality, and she feels privileged yet again that Olivia feels comfortable enough to show her all the different parts of herself, including her more insecure qualities.
"Alright, guys, listen up!" Amanda calls out over the ridiculous amount of noise that is permeating the living room. "I want all of these pillows and blankets picked up right this instant, and then we're going to bed."
"But I wanna watch the movie!" Noah shouts in complaint, giant tears immediately welling up in his eyes and streaking down his small face.
"Really? Well, that's news to me," Amanda replies with an arched eyebrow and a surprised tone, her hands coming up to rest on her hips. "It seems to me that all the two of you want to do is throw pillows at each other. I don't see very much movie-watching going on here."
"I wanna watch the movie with my sister!" Noah pouts in response, his hands on his own hips now and a tongue sticking out of his mouth as he glares spitefully at Amanda.
She throws a swift glance over her shoulder at Olivia who has adopted the exact same position and expression that she had before, a deer-in-the-headlights look that has Amanda feeling a mixture of emotions on the situation; unsure if she wants to jump for joy at Noah's proclamation or just ignore it and carry on with their evening like he hadn't said anything. That familiar concern is simmering underneath the other emotions now that she knows without a doubt that the little boy had heard them talking; terrified that Olivia is going to get scared again and decide to pack up and leave when all Amanda wants is for her and Noah to stay there forever with Jesse and Frannie and herself, in their cozy little home filled with chaos and love.
She figures the best course of action for now is to just pretend that she hasn't heard what Noah had said, at least until she is able to have a serious chat with Olivia about everything and finally hear what the older woman actually thinks about all that has transpired between them over the past week; the declaration of love, the shared intimacy, and the fact that they have been living as a family for the last several days. Amanda blows out an frazzled breath and leans down to scoop Jesse up with one arm and ruffle a hand over Noah's unruly hair, stepping carefully over the clumps of pillows and blankets that are strewn across the floor.
"You know what?" she says brightly as she sneaks another peek at Olivia, who is watching her with an unreadable expression fixed on her features, hooded eyes flicking back and forth between Amanda and her son. "We're just going to leave this mess alone for now and snuggle up in Jesse's bed with a few good books, okay? We can clean this up another time and we'll finish the movie tomorrow. Right now, I think it would be best if we all just settle down and relax for the rest of the night."
"But I wanna watch the movie now," Noah whines pitifully, dragging his feet along the floor as Amanda leads the group slowly back to her daughter's bedroom, Frannie trotting eagerly after them.
"I have a better idea," she replies with feigned enthusiasm as she gets both kids settled on the bed with Frannie leaping up beside them right away, trying not to show how utterly exhausted she is with this day. "Why don't you and Jesse take turns showing me how well you can read? I want to hear some great stories from you guys."
She is relieved when her suggestion is met with quite a bit more interest than she had expected, and squeezes herself onto the tiny toddler bed next to both children and the dog, tilting her head in curiosity when she hears the water in the bathtub turn on. Amanda shrugs to herself as Noah presents her with a giant hardcover children's book, figuring Olivia has decided to take a bath while she has some time alone and trying to push down any thoughts that insist on creeping into her mind of the other woman nude in the tub with droplets of moisture sliding down her smooth skin and foamy bubbles clinging to her curvy body.
It takes various made-up plotlines from Noah and Jesse's imaginations as they work their way through several books while the kids pretend they are reading, along with multiple cups of water for each child, before they have calmed down enough to drift off to sleep, tucked side by side in the small bed with Frannie resting on the floor. After Amanda has placed a kiss on both tiny foreheads and given her pet a rub behind the ears, she creeps as quietly as she can from the room, walking on her tiptoes, and goes in search of Olivia. She assumes the other woman is basking in the tub and enjoying her relaxation time, so she is puzzled when she notices that the bathroom door is standing wide open and the room appears to be mostly dark with the exception of a low flickering light.
Amanda frowns in confusion and surprise when she steps through the doorway and sees the tub filled to the brim with frothy white bubbles, a multitude of candles spread out across every available surface of the counter and shelves, the dancing flames creating shadowy patterns along the dim walls. Olivia appears from the kitchen clad in a short black robe with a glass of red wine held in each hand, thick hair curling around her shoulders and a shy smile gracing her lips.
"What's all this?" Amanda asks with a note of wonder in her tone, one eyebrow quirking in curiosity when Olivia hands her a glass before taking a sip from her own, unable to stop her gaze from wandering down to those long bare legs.
"As a thank you for everything that you've done for us this past week, and because we got interrupted at an inconvenient time earlier, I thought I would set this up for you," Olivia replies softly, stepping closer to Amanda so they are standing nearly nose to nose before the brunette leans in to place a lingering kiss on her lips. "You deserve a night to unwind after this crazy week."
"Well, I appreciate that very much, Liv," Amanda says quietly, a warmth unfurling inside her chest as she reaches up to caress the older woman's cheek, and she doesn't think she has ever loved Olivia more than she has at this very moment; so relieved that this is the scene that has greeted her upon exiting Jesse's bedroom instead of being faced with Olivia's rejection and urge to flee. "But we weren't really interrupted at an inconvenient time, were we? I think you were pretty satisfied with the way things went in my bedroom, if I'm remembering correctly."
"Yes, your memory is quite amazing, Amanda," Olivia remarks wryly with a roll of her eyes and a somewhat embarrassed smile tugging at her lips. "But my memory is pretty good too and I seem to recall that only one of us was satisfied in that bedroom. And that doesn't seem very fair to me."
Amanda's mouth has gone completely dry at the lieutenant's words so she takes a quick gulp of the wine to ease her suddenly parched throat, her heart picking up to a thundering pace and all thoughts of a serious discussion immediately obliterated from her brain, even though she is aware that there is an ever-growing list of things that need to be talked about. "So what are you suggesting?"
"I'm suggesting that you lose those clothes and get into the tub," Olivia answers in a voice that is both sultry and uncertain, Amanda's toes curling inside her socks in response and swallowing hard at the other woman's next statement. "I haven't actually wanted to admit this to you because it sounds rather immature, but I've been dying to see what you look like naked."
Amanda is suddenly handing Olivia her glass of wine and grabbing onto the hem of her shirt with both hands, yanking the top over her head and tossing it to the ground before attacking her belt buckle with a swift enthusiasm that is overtaking her rapidly diminishing fatigue, her tone radiating with an energetic anticipation for what is to come.
"Well, geez, Liv, all you had to do was ask!"